Osama is back, just in time for the Oscars, releasing a new collection of his greatest hits:
An audio tape purported to carry the voice of Osama bin Laden called on Iraqis to carry out suicide attacks against Americans and defend themselves against a U.S. attack.
The tape was broadcast on the Al-Jazeera Arab satellite station on Tuesday, the first day of the Muslim holiday Eid al-Adha. The speaker also urged Iraqis to dig trenches and engage in urban warfare to fend off U.S. troops.
“We stress the importance of martyrdom operations against the enemy, these attacks that have scared Americans and Israelis like never before,” the speaker said, using a term often used by militants for suicide attacks.
Before the broacast, Secretary of State Colin Powell told a Senate panel Tuesday that he had read a transcript of the statement and that it shows why the world needs to be concerned about Iraqi ties to terrorism.
This will no doubt fluster the Democrats, who have been whining for months that there is no connection between Al Qaeda and Osama. Well, is this tape is real, there is now a connection. In short, loudmouths, here are your options:
1.) Claim the tapes are fake, and quit claiming Osama is alive. This will upset the anti-war crowd a great deal, as one of their favorite responses to the Bush Iraq policy has been to wail “What About Osama?”
2.) Claim the tapes are real, and endorse an attack on Iraq.
I am betting they will go for the third option, which is to sputter incoherently, call Bush the ‘selected’ President, scream something about unilateralism, and then go write domestic spending projects while yelling at Bush for ruining the deficit. Daschle and Kerry, of course, will have some more serious questions.
*** UPDATE ***
I was just reading Atrios (need to check in daily to find out who is a racist, you know), and I found that the Democrats have chosen option #4, which goes something like this:
The tape is a fake, planted by the CIA to prove a link between Osama and Saddam. Despite the fake nature of the tape, however, do not assume that we think bin Laden is dead. On the contrary, this tape shows that BUSH has failed to kill Osama and is a unilateralist bully who will do anything to go to war with Iraq.
My head hurts.