Chief Republican economic advisor Joe the Plumber speaks:
And no reason to be subtle, he said, as long as folks inform themselves. “I don’t believe there’s two sides to every story. It’s black and white,” Wurzelbacher explained. “There’s right and wrong.”
One thing that needs to be done, he said, is killing this stimulus package, because it’s just another example of “American government” — Republicans and Democrats — “kicking our butts left and right.” He also called it welfare.
As for his own political career, America will just have to wait six years until his son grows up.
“I don’t know if the American public deserve me,” he said, “but my son definitely deserves my time now.”
Normally, I would agree that the American public doesn’t deserve to be governed by someone like Joe the Plumber, but these days I am not so sure. If there was a way I could have the Republicans governed by Joe the Plumber and Sarah Palin, and the rest of us led by others, I would do it in a heartbeat.
*** Update ***
BTW, as many commenters have pointed out, black and white and right and wrong are two sides to a story.
Adrienne
As I mentioned, I welcome our new Republican overlords. Palin, Rush, and JTP as the Three Headed Cerberus keeping Republicans from leaving electoral Hades.
All your votes are belong to us.
Keith
This reminds me that FoxNews skit where Rush and Ann Coulter were POTUS/VPOTUS, and a sizeable number of viewers vocally wrote/called in about it being a genuinely *terrific* (and serious) idea. Of course, that same channel spouted the "Having a country within viewing range of a remote island in your state counts as foreign experience" as what I thought was a joke (it came from Doocy) but took on a life of its own until it starts showing up in stump speeches by the candidate herself.
Politically Lost
No, we don’t.
Keepin’ it real there joe.
The Grand Panjandrum
So the American public is now Wayne and Garth?
I’m going to get yucks out of this for a few days. Just glad I wasn’t drinking anything when I read this piece.
Dave
As the waves of Stupid keep rolling off the GOP, I find it both more and more amazing and embarrassing that I used to be a Republican in the long ago. Did I ever come off as this much of an idiot?
Laura W
Glad to hear you refer to having a heartbeat today.
A pick-me-up/mental/heart health break
Fwiffo
I just don’t understand.
So, companies getting a handout are going to be required to limit executive pay, but it’s an optional requirement. They can waive it by letting shareholders know, and they have to let shareholders vote, but the vote is nonbinding. While we’re at it, let’s make them do the hokey-pokey.
Dustin
There is a way John, it’s called "Jesusland".
bago
Ok, when does Ministry release New
World Order 2?
Edited to provide version that doesn’t show Al being an old fogey. (Goddammit, I’m getting old).
Zifnab
It’s "kicking our butts left and right"? What the hell does that even mean? Oh no! Don’t add an extra two lanes to my highway! Don’t clean up my national parks! Don’t provide financial assistance to home owners! My bum! My bum! I have been kick’et’ed!
Phoenix Woman
John: Have a hug. And a whiskey seven.
How’s His Tunchiness doing?
Dave
@Zifnab:
My drinking water is clean!! Why, government, why??!!
flounder
John, every time you mention Joe or Sarah, you need to throw in an offhand comment that they are both tax cheats. You will thank me later for this, I guarantee.
Roar
I moved away a couple of years ago, but Ohio’s 9th seems smart enough not to elect this cretin.
Notorious P.A.T.
"Black and white" sounds to me like two sides. But I’m not an unlicensed plumber.
former capitalist
"I don’t believe there’s (sic) two sides of the story…there’s right and wrong". WTF? 1)right 2)wrong.
Dave
On the upside, however, Obama is signing the SCHIP expansion today. Just one more example of the government kicking us by keeping kids healthy.
I hope the Frost’s have their home on lockdown because this will likely send Malkin into screed/stalker mode again.
Adrienne
@Dave: Oh noez! Please don’t fix that crumbling school! Oh, the horror! Think of the CHILDREN!!
former capitalist
@Notorious P.A.T.: Beat me to it. Sorry.
magisterludi
In deference to plumbers everywhere, I submit Joe the Plumber be heretofore known only as Joe the Butt Crack.
Grand Moff Texan
How does Joe the Plumber sound any dumber than the average blogger or commentator here on the left, lately?
I think the only difference between him and a lot of my online friends is that Joe has been given enough microphone cord to hang himself with. That is all.
.
Tom
Was he being serious here, or self-deprecating?
Athenae
It would be so hilarious if the world wasn’t, you know, COMPLETELY BURNING DOWN OH MY GOD.
A.
Wisdom
The small percentage of the electorate who decided the last vote are already starting to realize there mistake and it will be clear to them before the year is out. While the democrats fiddle with their lemony socialism, we’ll see how that works out for you when Barack returns for another Trillion (or two) in October. Of course, nobody here will hold him accountable for this bailouts failure, but those populists you love to snark about will.
Unfortunately, people are going to learn exactly what it was like to live under FDR and discover just how much revisionism there’s been.
Dave
@Adrienne:
No government, don’t keep mercury out of my food! Bad government!!
TenguPhule
When they want a word to mean something it means exactly what they want it to mean.
The Other Steve
Joe the Plumber is awesome!
Get him on The Daily Show now!
Notorious P.A.T.
It means the last 8 years have been so good for America that if we start to do the opposite we are DOOMED!
jharp
“I don’t believe there’s two sides to every story. It’s black and white,”
There you have it. Exactly what the Limbaugh and Hannity crowd believe.
Conservatively Liberal
Too bad we can’t give them Alaska. Then let the AIP take over up there and watch them secede. We cut off a welfare state and clean up the lower 48.
Problem solved! If we were really lucky after independence they would immediately declare war on Russia.
Rome Again
Ummm, NO! That’s just too many ways of wrong to count.
HyperIon
well, at least he’ll have to clear up that tax lien before he takes over.
SpotWeld
I got to feel a little sorry for the kid. Imagine it, constant reminders on how the US is a horrible place (… because of Obama and the liberial media) and how his dad would be out there fixing it, if he did have to stay home and raise his kid.
Or worse.. even more tales of how said kid is expected to "repay" all this investment by his father by one day helping his dad "speak the truth" to the world.
It’s like watching a GOP themed version of "Gypsy".
…Everything’s Coming up Joeses?
Dexter Morgan
@Adrienne:
Sarah and Joe rulz. And Libruls are teh stupid.
Rome Again
This would be best, I think.
This would make it even better. I’m sure we’d all be happy with this war starting, although I’m not so sure how the new Alaskans would like the ending.
Punchy
Brainstorming this…..so…..do Republican aides and/or reps show up and actually think he’s an articulate, well-reasoned and cogent economic egghead, or was this more in the realm of a circus-like pep rally?
I’m serious….are the R’s so shockingly off the reservation as to take his words and message with any merit at all? If so……WOW are we in trouble.
TenguPhule
Fixed.
Because I owe Conservative Liberal a Melted Brain.
Rome Again
If you don’t solve a problem the first time and have to go back and work at it one more time, it’s not because the first solution was the problem, it’s because "THE PROBLEM WAS TOO FUCKING BIG" – and that problem (Mr. Wisdumb) is BUSH’s ECONOMY on BUSH’s WATCH!
Go take a walk in traffic, please.
Punchy
You’ll have to forgive Republicans on this. They havent recognized anything colored Black in their lifetimes. I’m sure they’re busy congratulating Steele on his phat tan.
TenguPhule
Snark and bad grammer in the same sentence.
DougJ, are you even trying anymore?
Tonal Crow
I think it might be child abuse for this guy to *have* a child.
Dexter Morgan
@ dave
"On the upside, however, Obama is signing the SCHIP expansion today. Just one more example of the government kicking us by keeping kids healthy."
Socialism!
DougJ
@Laura
It’s not Don Johnson doing "Heart Beat".
Joshua Norton
Amazing insight there Joey. Usually you have to talk to a bartender or a barber to get such astute, in-depth analysis.
TenguPhule
No need to insult bartenders here.
Adrienne
@Dave: Oh noez! Please, pretty please don’t fix that crumbling bridge I used to drive over everyday on my way to work, when I actually had a job! Why do you hate America?
Dexter Morgan
@Tom:
"Was he being serious here, or self-deprecating?"
Self-deprecation requires a certain level of humility, something this subliterate nitwit surely lacks.
amorphous
He’s right! Fucking welfare queen roads and other public infrastructure. You know that the integrated power grid is only going to blow it on booze, and the railroads are going to buy Wii games.
kommrade reproductive vigor
So he thinks Republicans and Democrats are part of the problem.
If I thought he were being honest or even had some control over what came out of his mouth I’d almost admire him.
No one deserves that.
Stooleo
From Bloomberg
I wonder if this is what Dick Armey (Cock Tommygun) meant when he said that America was a nation of whiners.
Adrienne
@Tonal Crow: I hear ya. We need a license to drive, and a license to do just about everything else, but *THIS* guy can have a kid no questions asked? Really?
But what about the children?
Joshua Norton
Sure. I can imagine a bunch of Georgetown grads are thrilled to be hanging on JTP’s every word. Especially since they’ve had to whore themselves out to the Heritage Foundation and all Jo(k)e had to do was shoot off his big mouth in front of a TV camera.
Next they’ll be found sitting at the feet of the flag pin lady taking copious notes.
/snark
...now I try to be amused
We need a word for "rule by pretend politicians". Pseudocracy?
liberal
@Rome Again:
Bullcrap.
The fact that Obama appears to be in the process of gearing up to bail out banks in return for almost no upside for the taxpayer is at issue.
His doing so is (a) bad policy, and (b) inequitable, regardless of how solvable the general economic crash is.
amorphous
@…now I try to be amused: Republican-controlled government.
Brick Oven Bill
I do believe that the Obama Administration is on the edge. Therefore, as I share the ideals that he espoused on the campaign trail, and sincerely hope that Obama is not an agent of the power structure, I will provide this plan to save his Administration. It would work.
1. Hire Joe the Plumber as a government ‘Anti-Corruption Czar’. Give him a budget of $10 million and free reign to ask questions and write about his findings. Let the American people judge what he finds.
2. Publically urge the Congress to pass a law mandating the IRS to perform audits on leaders in all branches of government. This audit shall be done by three IRS agents, who will all need to sign their names, and be witnessed by a junior officer, and two enlisted men.
3. If Congress fails to pass this law, enact it by Executive Order, and let Congress defend themselves before the Justice System and the Press.
Mnemosyne
Wow, you must be pretty old if you lived under FDR and are here today to tell us what it was like. After all, you must have been at least 14 or 15 when he was first elected in 1932 if you can really give us a first-hand account and not just a bunch of recycled BS from people who claim to be able to tell us about what "really" happened 60 years before they were born.
So tell us, what was it like, Grandpa?
Adrienne
@Mnemosyne: He’s older than Grandpa. He’s like great grandpa, or even great, great Grandpa.
My own grandma is 75 and she was born in 1933. 2 years AFTER Roosey was sworn in.
Stooleo
Joe the plumber is a dumb ass, certainly. He has only the weakest grasp on policy issue like the bailout, so I can understand why he says stupid shit in public. What I don’t understand is why the republicans keep calling him up to do stuff for them. What pearls of wisdom are dropping from Joe’s mouth behind closed doors, cause they sure aren’t dropping in public.
Rome Again
@liberal:
I’m not disagreeing with you liberal, I’m merely stating that the original problem was not Obama’s fault. The economy fell out under Bush. Rightwingers are now acting like Obama got us into this mess. I’m not saying I don’t disagree with how any of this is handled, but, I’m not the one making policy decisions, am I? Neither are you. Hope for the best and keep your mouth shouting out other ideas and hopefully they will take one day soon.
How would you make it equitable to the American public? Some say give the loans to directly to those who are in foreclosure, how many people will then stop paying their mortgage payments so that they can get money too? That is not a solution, it’s a bigger problem. How would you solve it?
Dave
@Adrienne:
My grandmother came of age in the Roaring 20s and experienced all the suck of the 30s. As bad as it is now, it was a lot worse then. And she, a crusty, self-sufficient Irishwoman, fucking loved FDR. He saved this country and jackasses like Wisdom can cram it with walnuts.
Napoleon
A must read from Josh Marshall.
I think it is pretty clear at this point the right in this country intends to do everything in its power to destroy this country’s economy in order to hurt the Democrats, and the Democrats are too gutless to get rid of the filibuster and pass the plan, Republican’s be damned.
Dave
@Napoleon:
They genuinely want the country to suffer and for Obama to fail. And while I understand that on an intellectual level, I cannot comprehend on a human level how an entire group of people can be so morally benighted as to embrace a strategy like that.
Notorious P.A.T.
I love it.
Stefan
“I don’t believe there’s two sides to every story. It’s black and white,” Wurzelbacher explained. “There’s right and wrong.”
Um, aren’t those two sides? Right and wrong aren’t the same side, after all…..
chrome agnomen
the funny, not ha ha, thing? if the plumber served one or two terms, screwed the country up even worse that W did in 8 years, and then a dem was elected? we’d be going through the same thing right now.
it is literally impossible for me to imagine what the right thinks is the direction this country should be going in, or what the core values of the country should be, or how anything would ever get done as far as the infrastructure with the kind of people in charge that they seem to favor.
would it all just happen by divine fiat? help me, FSM, in my ignorance, that i might see.
Adrienne
@Dave: Oh, I agree that it was probably a LOT worse then. No safety net, the first real recession of the manufacturing age, and still being pegged to the gold standard makes for a very explosive situation. My grandma was a child during the 30’s and early 40’s but she still remembers. Her father worked for Atlantic Steel and so he was employed, but times were still hard.
new day rising
My 2010 presidential campaign dream team is Joe and Sarah. I really don’t care which one gets top spot. What great fun it would be!
chrome agnomen
and don’t give them alaska. i still want to visit. put them on the part of antarctica that we control, and let them report on the myth of global warming.
Davis X. Machina
.
It’s easy to imagine. Imagine 16th century France.
Ward 3 Denizen
BOB is serving rotten leftovers from yesterday’s thread. Caveat emptor.
Tsulagi
“Clown shoes” is the appropriate tag.
During the campaign didn’t Nutters proudly proclaim “We are all Joe the Plumber!”? True then, true now. They ought to add a JTP lapel pin to their collection. Stay the Course.
Zuzu's Petals
Much as I hate to give them the hits, here’s the latest from "Joe" the "Plumber":
PJTV/YouTube
He starts out by describing the Heritage and Cato foundations – oh, and Club for Growth – as "neutral." No kidding. How they’d jump behind any idea, Dem or Repub, that was good, and wow, they’re ALL against the stimulus package !
BTW, did you know that a 50% tax decrease is going to the "Hollywood Elite"?!
The best part was "Joe"/Roger’s utter bewilderment why PJTV was denied press credentials for being an opinion-content format when that opinionated NBC gets credentials….
Though his thorough and insightful analysis of the GOP version of the bill is stellar … "There’s absolutely no pork in it!"
Laura W
@DougJ:
I am one huge disappointment, DougJ.
Of course I had to go find your offering. I made it to 2:12, with the sound off. It was just that visually disturbing to me. How on earth he milked it to over 4 minutes with "music" and "lyrics" shall remain one of the great mysteries in my life. (Because I have no intention of answering my own question.)
liberal
@Rome Again:
That’s true. For purposes of political propaganda, it’s fine to say that it’s Bush’s fault.
But if we’re honest about the history, the Clinton administration bears a heavy responsibility. The efforts to prevent any regulation of derivatives date from then, as does the gutting of Glass-Stegal.
Of course, the basis of hte whole thing is the fault of the Republicans, because Reagan started it all.
Huh?
Of course not. Equitable means equitable to the taxpayer—those of us who are going to be handing the money over to the banks, now and in the future when resulting gov’t debt has to be paid off.
Helping homeowners is actually terribly inequitable. A "home" is an asset, not a minimal standard of living. Bailing out homeowners sets a terrible precedent, namely that the government will put a floor under assets for their owners.
Furthermore, for every homeowner kept in his/her house via gov’t aid, a potential new homeowner is denied the chance to buy that house at a presumably lower price. Why should the gov’t play favorites like that?
Fact is that most homeowners in trouble (a) are underwater, (b) put little or nothing down. So they lose nothing but their pride and their credit rating if they walk. So "aid to homeowners" is mostly aid to bankers and their shareholders.
My point is about the bank bailout: insolvent banks should be shut down and put into receivership. Any bank which isn’t, which needs gov’t help, should be forced to give taxpayers a huge equity stake.
comrade rawshark
He’s an ordinary average guy saying what ordinary average guys want to hear said. Right and wrong has nothing to do with it. It has an added bonus of destroying instituions. If Jow can report from Gaza why do we need journalists who are biased. If Joe can talk ‘intelligently’ about economics we don’t need Krugmans. Plus he blames it all on the group designated as the enemy. Trust me, the heartland is swooning.
liberal
@Adrienne:
The folks critical of fractional reserve banking will tell you that the US was no longer truly on the gold standard long before the Depression hit.
liberal
@Rome Again:
I should add that the point is that that’s no excuse for Obama to appoint people like Summers and Geithner who were and apparently are part of the problem.
It’s like Bush committed an act of arson, and instead of calling the fire company, Obama calls more arsonists. Yeah, Obama didn’t start the fire, but he hired the wrong people to deal with it.
Al Swearengen
Joe’s inability to count to two must make his plumbing jobs go smoothly.
He and Palin are the perfect storm of media whoredom.
RememberNovember
Nice. Brings back memories of the 80’s- what a decade. it was our "60’s"
Rik comes into our place every now and again. Nice guy. one of our techs recently went to David Byrnes place as well.
Rome Again
I don’t disagree with that either.
liberal
@Rome Again:
Right, but that’s the BIG issue. We’re talking about hundreds of billions of dollars at risk, to be loaned to the criminals who precipitated this disaster.
scarshapedstar
Hey, John, I know you mean well and I agree with you completely here, and I understand the stylistic concerns that led to this sentence, but let’s not say that Republicans govern and Democrats lead. If anybody’s a flock of sheep, it’s, um, the elephants. You dig?
[/Lambert]
ThymeZone
Doug, please. You can write better spoof than this.
When did you stop trying?
scarshapedstar
Lambert, since I have an odd (probably alcohol/sudafed-induced, but still) feeling you’re perusing this thread, did I see a teensy bit of Hillary criticism there? Tee-hee-hee-hee!
Rome Again
Ummm, no! Samuel the Not-Joe, Not-Plumber doesn’t deserve 10m for anything. Why do you figure his accidental celebrity should be rewarded? What has he done?
Conservatively Liberal
You could throw five JtP’s at me and it wouldn’t faze me more than my description of what Palin could do to try and get my attention and fail. You gotta admit that combining live broadcast television, Palin, nudity, chocolate pudding, whipped cream, a zucchini and the Sybian Orgasm Machine makes for one bad nightmare.
Eh, eh? ;)
Improved.
scarshapedstar
Dudes. Wait, what? Shit’s weird. All I gotta say.