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Archives for March 2002
Hyperbole Alert: Karl Rove’s loyalty
Karl Rove’s loyalty police should be on deep orange alert, if not hot pink. There is a sleeper cell operating in the White House.
I actually watched Milbank defend this schlock on Hardball with Chris Matthews. Matthews was in his near orgasmic state (as he usually gets whenever someone mentions anything loosely conspiratorial), throwing out words like cabal as if Milbank’s writing was the revelation. Milbank seemed to take this whole thing in a more tongue in cheek matter, but Matthews was convinced- this is a NEOCON conspiracy.
At one point, Matthews even asked: “How does a Canadian (David Frum) become a speechwriter in the White House. No one bothered to ask how a windbag Carter speechwriter becomes a bloviating political talk show host.
Wake the children! Phone the neighbors. Grab the pitchfork. Conservatives with an interventionist foreign policy towards rogue states are at the helm of our government. Several of them are even (this is so horrible to mention), speechwriters.
I wouldn’t recommend sex, drugs
I wouldn’t recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they’ve always worked for me. —Hunter S. Thompson
Why is it that the people who are most against drugs are the ones who almost drive me to do them? Apparently there is a new drug hysteria brought on by the fact that Oklahoma thinks everyone in their band and other after-school activities is on crack. I remember when I was in High School, the joke went like this:
Did you hear that 80% of high school students are sexually active?
No. Really?
Yeah. The other 20% are in the band.
Apparently now they are smoking rock and shooting up. I did a google search for ‘drug fiending tuba players,’ and came up with nothing, so I am not sure how serious the problem really is, but I do know one thing- I would have had to have been stoned to the bejeezus to ever have anything to do with the band when I was in high school.
I spent several years working with people in the Education Department of a prominent university. You should hear some of the off-the -wall, hare-brained teaching strategies they teach prospective teachers to go out and inflict on our youth. No wonder they need an escape. Then again, half the students could be self-medicating themselves, trying to find some balance between all the ritalin and other crap all the fruity bastards in psychiatry are forcing the kids to take.
Hell, I need a stiff drink after listening to this pro drug testing nanny on MSNBC.
Our country does have a serious drug problem. It is our drug policy.
Has anyone seen Glenn Kinen
Has anyone seen Glenn Kinen or Matt Yglesias lately?
William Sulik confirms he is
William Sulik confirms he is a geek with an ‘all your base’ reference.
This is what passes for
This is what passes for humor in the Observer/Guardian. A ‘humorous’ timeline since 9/11. Some tidbits:
September 19th: The pop singer Michael Jackson is refused permission to lie down and sing songs from his new album into the World Trade Centre rubble. Jackson is reported to have been a ‘nuisance presence’ at Ground Zero – foisting cheaply embroidered MJ handkerchiefs on to grieving relatives and incessantly moondancing into the paths of rescue workers.
October 7th: Bush announces the start of Operation Bomb Islamics. He tells the US that coalition members agree this title is not offensive to ‘good Muslims’. This is confirmed in a hastily written episode of The West Wing in which a good Muslim is played by Jeff Goldblum.
October 9th: US bombs hit a Red Cross emergency centre on the outskirts of Kabul, but the Pentagon refuses to apologise, blaming the Red Cross logo for ‘looking like the crosshairs on a viewfinder’. Spokesman Paul Wolfowitz says: ‘I’d ask this clearly self-loathing organisation to change its suicidal insignia before they kill us all.’ The Red Cross complies immediately and changes its logo to a blue baseball hat.
February 9th: WTC legal fall-out. A New York banker whose car was hit by a man jumping out of the burning north tower is suing the dead man’s estate because he failed to curl up into a neat ball to minimise the damage. The city of New York is to sue firms occupying the upper 38 storeys of both towers because as they crashed earthwards, they added hugely to the numbers of people on the lower floors, thus ‘momentarily breaking fire regulations’.
Funny stuff, people jumping from burning buildings, mass murder, accidental war casualties. Is Ted Rall British?
Steve den Beste comes out
Steve den Beste comes out blasting like Yosemite Sam on Africa, Asia, and well, the rest of the world.
Yes. That was a Cypress Hill reference.