Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

T R E 4 5 O N

fuckem (in honor of the late great efgoldman)

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

You can’t love your country only when you win.

Since when do we limit our critiques to things we could do better ourselves?

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

Insiders who complain to politico: please report to the white house office of shut the fuck up.

Presidents are not kings, and Plaintiff is not President.

All your base are belong to Tunch.

If you are still in the GOP, you are an extremist.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

No one could have predicted…

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

Whatever happens next week, the fight doesn’t end.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

After roe, women are no longer free.

Perhaps you mistook them for somebody who gives a damn.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

When your entire life is steeped in white supremacy, equality feels like discrimination.

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101Comments

  2. 2.

    dreggas

    I read about the guy in Minn. the other day and damn near put a large object through my monitor. I was talking with one of our security people this morning about the cuts to the VA (he was in the Army as I was) and about all the “support the troops” bullshit. We both agreed that despite Shithead (bush’s) rhetoric in 2000 the military was in damn good shape when Clinton left office and the VA was as well.

    Now the military is truly at the breaking point and the VA is a shambles thanks to the influx of new patients and cases that are the result of Operation Avenge My Daddy.

    As I said earlier, it pisses me off to no end to see people use these troops as a shield when we expose them for the assholes they are, however it pisses me off even more that they profess devotion to the troops with an overly pious fervor but in the end it’s still just words and the Troops are nothing more than a political tool.

  3. 3.

    The Other Steve

    Ok, so Bush’s budget for Iraq shows a substantial decline in 2008… and his budget for the VA shows a decline in 2009.

    I think this means Bush is planning to withdraw troops from Iraq in 2008.

  4. 4.

    Punchy

    Ok, so Bush’s budget for Iraq shows a substantial decline in 2008

    isnt he proposing something like 145 BILL for 2008 ops in both Affy and Iraq?

    Perhaps that’s a cut…but DAMN, that’s still a LOT of scratch that could pay for a TON of VA assistance. But hey…he doesn’t want them to go bored, hence he puts them back in Iraq. And to ensure they don’t screw up (read: get hurt), he’s cut a portion of their healthcare.

    Bush supports the troops. Fox News says so.

  5. 5.

    Mike

    What did you expect John? For Bush to treat soldiers with the respect and honor they deserve? He knows he was never able to live up their standards or be fit to polish their boots, and for that, he will piss on them until the day he dies.

    Makes you proud to be a republican, right? Now, will you finally come to grips with the fact that Bush LIED ABOUT THIS TOO, and admit that he lied and that you believed it?

    It is not so difficult, and I promise that it will be good for you to admit the painful obvious truth of the matter. It will relieve you of a stinking burden that you no longer have to carry. BUSH. LIED. TO. ME. Go ahead. Say it out loud. Relish it. Use the word LIE in its full glory.

  6. 6.

    Bubblegum Tate

    As I said earlier, it pisses me off to no end to see people use these troops as a shield when we expose them for the assholes they are, however it pisses me off even more that they profess devotion to the troops with an overly pious fervor but in the end it’s still just words and the Troops are nothing more than a political tool.

    A-fucking-men.

  7. 7.

    Zifnab

    We both agreed that despite Shithead (bush’s) rhetoric in 2000 the military was in damn good shape when Clinton left office and the VA was as well.

    I’ve heard this meme before. Clinton cut the defense budget and people cried foul over all the money that should have been going to the “troops”. Meanwhile, contractors were still picking up billion dollar contracts for weapons systems that don’t work and weapons we would never (in a sane administration) have a reason to use. A billion on new stealth bombers. But no money for bullet-proof vests. Hmmm…

    Somehow that was Clinton’s fault.

  8. 8.

    Tsulagi

    What did you expect John? For Bush to treat soldiers with the respect and honor they deserve? He knows he was never able to live up their standards or be fit to polish their boots, and for that, he will piss on them until the day he dies.

    I’m too pissed to write too, so I’ll just add a nod to what I blockquoted.

  9. 9.

    ThymeZone

    We can’t ever repay these veterans, but we can pony up generous funding and try like hell.

    I really can’t understand why anybody would want to reduce funding for veterans benefits. It’s nuts.

  10. 10.

    Pb

    Boy that’s depressing. I’ll counter with a horrific yet hopeful story–and as the diarist says, “before you click on it, be warned that it’s one of the most tragic photographs I’ve ever seen”.

  11. 11.

    Zifnab

    I really can’t understand why anybody would want to reduce funding for veterans benefits. It’s nuts.

    Bush is in political freefall mode. He can’t get hated anymore, so he’s free to offer up dumb-as-shit ideas to the general public to give his fellows cover to utter the phrase, “Well at least we tried, unlike the Democrats who have no new ideas.”

  12. 12.

    ThymeZone

    Yes Pb, Jonathan posted that the other day. It’s a heart stopper. I couldn’t post to the thread the rest of that day.

    It’s heartbreaking. Enough of this shit is enough, for God’s sake. This shot has to stop.

  13. 13.

    les

    Don’t worry, it’s just part of the balanced budget con; see here at Carpetbagger Report.

    White House budget office spokesman Sean Kevelighan said the cuts for veterans’ health care “don’t reflect any policy decisions. We’ll revisit them when we do the (future) budgets.”

  14. 14.

    Steve

    Of course we should do whatever it takes to make sure our veterans get all the benefits and health care they deserve. It’s the least we can do.

    But I note that veterans voted for Bush over Kerry by a 16-point margin. Democrats, God bless ’em, continue to push for veterans’ benefits because it’s the right thing to do. But where is the incentive for Republicans to do more for veterans, considering they’re easily carrying this constituency even as they propose cut after cut?

  15. 15.

    Mike

    But I note that veterans voted for Bush over Kerry by a 16-point margin. Democrats, God bless ‘em, continue to push for veterans’ benefits because it’s the right thing to do. But where is the incentive for Republicans to do more for veterans, considering they’re easily carrying this constituency even as they propose cut after cut?

    That is clearly more incentive for the Rethugs to blow these guys off. “Look, they voted for us after we screwed them. Let’s screw them some more.”

  16. 16.

    Zifnab

    Indictments for some, decorative party hats for others!

    A federal grand jury handed down indictments for Dusty Foggo and Brent Wilkes today in a major blow against the systemic corruption that has kept the GOP fat and sassy. Just before noon the A.P. reported that Foggo, Bush’s eyes and ears (and grabby hands) inside the CIA– he was a political operative and hack– was charged with fraud, conspiracy and money laundering in conjunction with the ongoing and expanding “Duke” Cunningham case. Wilkes, who had received as much as $100 million in illicit Bush Regime contracts, many through the connivance of Foggo and Cunningham, was charged with conspiring to bribe Cunningham. A third crooked Republican, John Michael, nephew of convicted GOP bigwig Thomas Kontogiannis, was also charged.

  17. 17.

    Jake

    I am sure all the people furious about Obama’s remarks will be spear-heading a movement for restoring funding to the VA and expanded services.

    John Cole made a funny.

    I guess the soldiers will get purple heart bandages and a smack on the ass. Or to paraphrase Rumsfilled: “You come back from war to the VA you have.”

    But I note that veterans voted for Bush over Kerry by a 16-point margin.

    Uh. Yeah. Does anyone have a link to poll results for a more recent election? (cough2006cough)

  18. 18.

    Kimmitt

    Why would Bush — or the rest of the chickenhawks — do anything for soldiers once they’re done with them? If they wanted decent health care, they wouldn’t be poor enough to serve.

  20. 20.

    Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop

    God forbid you clowns use a little perspective:

    Yet, the data from the Office of Management and Budget suggests that this agency has been dramatically under—funded for over five decades.

    For instance, in 1947, the budget for veterans’ benefits and services was $6.344 billion. As amazing as it might seem, in Lyndon Johnson’s last budget in fiscal 1969, the VA received $7.670 billion —— a shockingly low 21% increase in 22 years.

    During this same period, the total spending by our federal government increased by 432%, which means that VA spending in the two plus decades following World War II — in the midst of the Korean and Vietnam wars — increased at only 4.8% the rate of the aggregate federal budget. Wow!

    I guess Presidents Truman, Eisenhower, Kennedy, and Johnson weren’t very big on veterans’ affairs. Or, could it have been the Democrat—controlled Congress during this period was blocking increases in VA spending?

    By contrast, under Bush 43, the VA budget has gone from $45 billion to $68 billion in fiscal 2005, representing a 51% increase during his first term. This compares to a 32% increase in the total federal budget during the same period.

    This means that not only has this president been the first since World War II to increase VA spending at the rate of growth of the federal budget, he actually increased funding for this agency at 1.57 times that growth.

    and from the article you linked:

    the veterans’ medical services budget — up 83 percent since Bush took office and winning a big increase in Bush’s proposed 2008 budget

    So what President has done more for the VA than Bush has? [crickets] Now go back to your BDS whining about how Bush hates veterans and wants them to die on the streets.

  21. 21.

    Larv

    As infuriating as this is, it’s pretty much par for the course. On the bright side, I don’t think there’s very much chance that the cuts will ever happen. This is just a way of gaming the budget. You predict cuts in sacred programs to get the numbers to work, then when it comes time to actually implement the cuts, reverse course and say you’re doing it for the troops. If anyone complains, accuse them of hating the troops and wanting veterans to suffer. Republican budget 101.

  22. 22.

    Nikki

    “It’s kind of surprising,” Carbone, 28, of North Haledon, said Monday. “It’s one of those things that you always expect to be taken care of after everything you do.” (…)

    Why do soldiers continue to believe that is the Republics who support them the most when VA benefits always seem to be dramatically slashed under a Republic administration? Is that what the troops consider “supporting the troops”?

  23. 23.

    Perry Como

    So what President has done more for the VA than Bush has?

    You got that right Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop. Bush is keeping a steady supply of seriously wounded soldiers flowing into the VA. Mission accomplished.

  24. 24.

    Otto Man

    It’s all about priorities, John. We’ve earmarked $20,000,000 dollars for a victory party for Operation Awesome Kickass!™ and therefore have to cut funding for frivolous, unimportant issues like taking care of the men and women who defend us and make sacrifices on our behalf.

    Jesus, what do you expect Bush to do? Roll back the tax cuts for the rich?

  25. 25.

    Mike S

    Maybe he’s unhappy that so many veterans ran and won as Democrats. He figures that they are ungratefull bastards and don’t deserve the support anymore.

  27. 27.

    Nikki

    Boy that’s depressing. I’ll counter with a horrific yet hopeful story—and as the diarist says, “before you click on it, be warned that it’s one of the most tragic photographs I’ve ever seen”.

    And that photo has made me cry.

  28. 28.

    BettyPageisaBlonde

    Um, Ellison, Blowhard, Douchebag & Company… Might it occur to you that a great many of us would like to see spending INCREASED*? Cite your statistics until you’re blue in the face. More money for the people who’ve put it on the line for you, me and everyone else.

    *All caps because I’m not convinced they can read anything other than, um, all caps.

  29. 29.

    Perry Como

    Cite your statistics until you’re blue in the face. More money for the people who’ve put it on the line for you, me and everyone else.

    How shrill.

  30. 30.

    Zifnab

    Maybe he’s unhappy that so many veterans ran and won as Democrats. He figures that they are ungratefull bastards and don’t deserve the support anymore.

    If Tammey Duckworth hadn’t run for Congress, and just killed herself, she’d have save the Republicans millions in campaign contributions spent against her.

    The cuts pay for themselves.

  32. 32.

    matt

    One of the problems (and why this isn’t political suicide when it obviously should be) is that the right wing noise machine pretty much controls the media narrative. If they don’t care, the press doesn’t care, and so people don’t care (or know).

    It’s why a botched joke can derail your presidential hopes, while actually screwing the troops hardly gets a notice.

    I would urge everyone to sign up at and support the folks at
    http://www.iava.org (Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America) a veterans advocacy group.

  33. 33.

    matt

    By the way, seriously, at least join their mailing list. They’re doing some really good (and important) work.

  34. 34.

    JWeidner

    Dozens of dolphins and sea lions trained to detect and apprehend waterborne attackers could be sent to patrol a military base in Washington state, the Navy said Monday.

    How the hell does a dolphin or sea lion apprehend someone?

  35. 35.

    Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop

    Might it occur to you that a great many of us would like to see spending INCREASED*?

    What the spending history shows a smart person is 1) that there may be problems at the VA, but getting funding under the BUsh Administration isn’t one of them. And 2) if you saw the stats from the WWII, Korea, and Vietnam era, you should see that the problem isn’t the war. The VA was funded much worse in much greater conflicts. And 3) the retarded “EvilBushHitler is an asshole for not supporting and respecting the troops!” hucksterism is shortbus rhetoric, but of course, I expect to see it from some of you BDS-stricken knuckledraggers.

  36. 36.

    Andrew

    Well, assuming we’re talking about being underwater, how the hell does a dolphin or sea lion not apprehend someone?

    I’m also assuming that they are armed with mini-torpedoes.

  37. 37.

    ThymeZone

    I expect to see it from some of you BDS-stricken knuckledraggers.

    Look, dude, this is Carnegie Hall here. We really don’t have time for second-rate amateurish spoof material.

    Either step up the quality or go back to the minor leagues and get some more practice.

  38. 38.

    John Cole

    So what President has done more for the VA than Bush has? [crickets] Now go back to your BDS whining about how Bush hates veterans and wants them to die on the streets.

    And what this chowderhead, EEEL, refuses to acknowledge is that the mortality rate in combat is down SIGNIFICANTLY due to an increased capacity to keep what would formerly be KIA soldiers in past wars alive. Hell, I bet Bush spends more on veteran services than his apparent mentor (if you are a Powerline reader), Abraham Lincoln. A great thing, if you ask me, but what does that mean, exactly?

    It means there are more wounded soldiers to contend with civilian side, with an even greater need for medical services for a long, long time. He needs to spend more. We need to spend more. And we still aren’t keeping up with demand.

    Next talking point, EEEL.

  40. 40.

    Rome Again

    Let’s not forget the amount of childbirth defects happening to those who were injured and then came home to father children. I knew a guy in college in Vegas who had this happen in the first gulf war. I understand it’s happening more and more now. Advanced chemical warfare and all (from our side, I hear).

  42. 42.

    tBone

    the retarded “EvilBushHitler is an asshole for not supporting and respecting the troops!” hucksterism is shortbus rhetoric, but of course, I expect to see it from some of you BDS-stricken knuckledraggers.

    Shorter Mac Buckets: Why are you goddamned traitorous terrarist-loving Defeatocrat retards so shrill?

  44. 44.

    tBone

    I’m also assuming that they are armed with mini-torpedoes.

    Damn it, I asked for sharks with frickin’ laser beams on their heads, not this chicken-of-the-sea-with-mini-torpedoes bullshit.

    Are the dolphins and sea lions ill-tempered, at least?

  45. 45.

    Otto Man

    Help me decipher the chowderheaded spoof: what the hell is a BDS?

    Bush Derangement Syndrome.

    It’s what conservatives call pointing out when the president makes a mistake. Its usage is usually a sign that the conservative in question has no real argument to make, no real facts to support his position, no reality to fall back upon and all they can do is insist that it’s just a personal grudge.

    In their eyes, Dear Leader cannot make a mistake. Dear Leader is glorious and great and wise. Anyone who argues — insanely, of course — that Dear Leader might not be glorious and great and wise is DoublePlusUngood.

  46. 46.

    Perry Como

    Help me decipher the chowderheaded spoof: what the hell is a BDS?

    Bush Defender Syndrome. Its symptoms include:

    – Blurred vision when budget numbers are released
    – Momentary deafness when accountability is called for
    – Reading impairment when Constitutional issues are brought up
    – Bouts of verbal diarrhea including, but not limited to: moonbat, appeaser, dhimmicrat, cut and run, stay the course
    – Apoplectic fits whenever the Decider is criticized for anything, ever

    The only known cure at this time is a heaping dose of reality. Unfortunately 27% of the population of the US has shown high levels of resistance to the cure.

    hth
    hand

  47. 47.

    jake

    Shorter E3L: I know how to search the internons to find stuff that supports what I think!

    I think this method of supporting one’s contentions is lazy (to say the least), but it can be amusing. For example, the E3L method of research allows the average moon bat to prove that President Bush is an unpleasant person.

  48. 48.

    Andrew

    Until 2002, the vast majority of VA expenses were for chronic health problems and end of life care for older vets. In many ways, it was basically a special medicare for vets.

    Now there are 25,000+ seriously injured vets coming into the pipeline once they come out of Tricare. Their problems are significantly different from those of the existing patients.

    You can’t reasonably extrapolate a cost increase proportional to the number of new patients because the type of care is radically different.

    Now, to address the blatant misrepresentations in EEEL’s stupid fucking quoted text:
    The 1947 funding includes the huge outlays for wartime only vets for education, unemployment benefits, and home buying assistance. Given the huge number of WW2 vets, it’s not surprising that this was a huge amount of money. In particular, the one year of unemployment insurance reached its peak claims in 1947.

    Now, these benefits were not extended to peacetime veterans who served after the war, so of course, this spending dropped significantly after the WW2 vets claimed these benefits. So, 1947 was a peak year of funding for quite a long time. There was a bump in 1952 with the Korea reauthorization of the GI bill, but VA funding dropped to $5 billion, FAR below the 1947 peak for many years afterwards. Adjusted for inflation, up until Vietnam, most years of post-1947 VA funding were a fraction of the 1947 expenditures.

    Now, onto Johnson, who apparently hated veterans so much that he extended GI bill benefits to ALL servicemembers, not just WW2 and Korea combatants. What an ass. Of course, the vast majority of Vietnam vets were not eligible for benefits by FY1969 — that didn’t occur until 1976 — but that does not matter to ass ponies like EEEL.

    Now, looking at George W Bush’s oh so generous increases in funding: the 51% increase in VA funding for the first 5 years of his term barely covers the inflation in health care costs. Benefits were not made more generous because Bush loves vets. Now, add in the significant expenditures for the aforementioned acute medical cases, and we see that his “generous” funding increases is, at best, keeping pace.

    The amount of VA funding relative to the size of the federal government MEANS ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING. The only metric is whether vets are getting the care and funding they need.

    In other words, go fuck yourself hard with an Ann Coulter hardcover in whatever orifice will bleed the most, EEEL.

  49. 49.

    Richard Bottoms

    We can’t ever repay these veterans, but we can pony up generous funding and try like hell.

    Sounds nice. But in reality the money will go to stealh carriers and planes, stuff that fattens the wallets of Republican donors.

    One of the problems (and why this isn’t political suicide when it obviously should be) is that the right wing noise machine pretty much controls the media narrative. If they don’t care, the press doesn’t care, and so people don’t care (or know).

    It’s why a botched joke can derail your presidential hopes, while actually screwing the troops hardly gets a notice.

    Saying mean things about the troops is more of a problem than actually doing mean things to them. At least if you are a Republican.

  50. 50.

    Davebo

    Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop

    Got a link to support your claims? Because American Thinker sure as hell doesn’t support them.

  52. 52.

    Ted

    I’m sorry, but the more than a few cases of PTSD afflicted vets who’ve killed themselves or someone else after being put on a waiting list for in-patient psych care is all the damning case you need for Bush’s VA support. And that’s leaving aside all the other cases dealing with physical health problems.

  53. 53.

    Perry Como

    Got a link to support your claims? Because American Thinker sure as hell doesn’t support them.

    I’m sure Hugh Hewitt said something that supports Lambchop.

  54. 54.

    Rome Again

    Saying mean things about the troops is more of a problem than actually doing mean things to them. At least if you are a Republican.

    Yeah, what’s up with that, kinda screwy, huh?

  55. 55.

    Richard 23

    When you offer too much health care and other services for free there will always be deadbeats that consume more than they need. I think it’s wise to cut excess funding to get down to the right level as opposed to the Democrat party that thinks the answer to everything is more money, tax and spend, and all that.

    While Democrats like to enslave people by keeping them on the government teat, smart and compassionate Republicans know better. Since we believe in individual responsibility, the correct course of action is one that nudges people in the direction of pulling themselves up by their own bootstraps.

    Democrats: a pony for every vet.
    Republicans: individual responsibility for all.

    Besides, it was Clinton who made deep cuts in the military. I think you can look to the nineties for the cause of most of today’s troubles.

  57. 57.

    The Other Andrew

    I think we’re going to have a spoof Presidential candidate, in 2008. “We’re at war, we’re deep in debt…let’s cut taxes!”

  58. 58.

    Rome Again

    Republicans: individual responsibility for all.

    “Liar”… excuse me, that’s not exactly correct… “Fucking Liar”!

  59. 59.

    Bob In Pacifica

    I worked for the VA Hospital in San Francisco from 1974 to 1979. The hospital was flooded not only with vets from Vietnam but also WWII vets and some Korean vets who were reaching the age where they needed serious healthcare. I don’t even know if a vet without healthcare can be seen at the VA unless it’s for a service-connected condition. A lot of coverage was reduced during the Reagan-Bush years.

    I find it reprehensible that people who send men off to war (since I’ve been paying attention off to wars that weren’t in our national interest) to be killed or wounded and then don’t take care of them when they get home. There hasn’t been a Republican administration in my lifetime that really gives a damn about our men and women in uniform.

  60. 60.

    Rome Again

    There hasn’t been a Republican administration in my lifetime that really gives a damn about our men and women in uniform.

    That’s because they really DON’T care. It’s all a freaking show, image only, made to look like they give a damn when they don’t. It’s fake, it’s trickery, it’s meant to deceive, for the purpose of re-election, and saving a buck for the upper 2$. YIPPEEEE! Fuck yeah!

  63. 63.

    grumpy realist

    Dolphins? And sea lions?

    Yeah, that’ll work REALLY well in the middle of Iraq….

    Sounds like the entire U.S.A. military has jumped the shark.

  64. 64.

    Sojourner

    Democrats: a pony for every vet.
    Republicans: individual responsibility for all.

    Translation: I got mine. Screw everyone else.

  65. 65.

    DougJ

    Lambchop, you seem like a bright sort. I’m going to give you a quiz. Finish the phrase “the right to work gets traded in for..”

    And then this one “you don’t know that now nobody’s gonna tell you, you don’t know that now…”

  69. 69.

    demimondian

    What the hell has happened to spoof?

    It’s turned

    Serious. Samrt. Strong.

    It’s just that you leftards are so far from the mainstream that you don’t see it. That’s how you are.

  70. 70.

    Sojourner

    It’s just that you leftards are so far from the mainstream that you don’t see it. That’s how you are.

    Check the polls, sweetheart.

  71. 71.

    tBone

    Check the polls, sweetheart.

    The Decider doesn’t decide on decisions by looking at polls, moonbat. And those “polls” are from the liberal MSM. How “honest” of you to omit that point.

  73. 73.

    demimondian

    Check the polls, sweetheart.

    After last November’s election, when the liberal MSM spent literally months swooning over Pelosi (and her daughter, the “film-maker”), while not investigating any instance of electoral fraud in Philadelphia. Oh, yeah, like their polls mean anything.

  74. 74.

    Zifnab

    A lie, a big fat lie!

    Get your facts straight. FOX is the most liberal news station on TV according to the New York Post. And the New York Post is manned by commie-terror-islamo-facists according the the Weekly Standard. And the Bill O’Reily says the Weekly Standard needs to come off the fence and be a real conservative.

    Every media outlet I listen to says the MSM is too liberal. They can’t all by lying. Next thing is you’re going to tell me they’re all owned by the same guy.

    Stoop liberals.

  76. 76.

    Mike

    Serious. Samrt. Strong.

    It’s just that you leftards are so far from the mainstream that you don’t see it. That’s how you are.

    Did you mispell “Samrt” intentionally? I almost lost my drink on my monitor.

  77. 77.

    Pb

    Speaking of Bill O’ (and spoofery), did you hear about his book? No, I mean the one from 1998:

    A string of murders rocks the media world. In the opening chapter, a TV correspondent covering the Clintons’ vacation on Martha’s Vineyard gets offed. The cause of death, O’Malley says, is a long-stemmed silver spoon “jammed through the roof of the guy’s mouth.” (Promoting the book on Good Morning America, O’Reilly told co-host Charlie Gibson, “I kill you on Page 6.”) The second TV bigwig to be murdered is “a young woman named Hillary Ross,” an executive whose “entire career has been based on using and abusing the press” and who “couldn’t care less about journalistic ethics because to her it’s an oxymoron.” Hillary’s punishment is severe: Michaels stuffs pantyhose in her mouth before tossing her off the balcony of a Central Park West apartment.

    As the narrative moves on, Michaels kills again and again. On a Malibu beach, he buries a man up to his neck in the sand. The crime? The victim produced faulty demographic research saying that younger audiences like younger news anchors. (Take that, Nielsen ratings!) Later, he slits the throat of local TV host Lance Worthington with a box cutter. “It’s a cutthroat business you’re in, Worthington,” the killer says. The use of literary metaphor is in full effect — the media industry is brutal, so brutal.

    It’s just amazing how hilariously bad and embarrassing the whole thing is–I just don’t see how you could write a more damning parody of a book that Bill O’ would write. So it’s no wonder that Stephen Colbert has so much respect for him–Bill O’ is already his own perfect self-parody!

  78. 78.

    demimondian

    Jeebus, Pb. That sounds truly…awful. I mean…really, really bad.

    Serious. Samrt. Strong. (Gotta figure out how to add that word to my FF spelling dictionary so that I don’t the nasty red line underneath…)

  79. 79.

    demimondian

    Jeebus, Pb. That sounds truly…awful. I mean…really, really bad.

    Serious. Samrt. Strong. (Gotta figure out how to add that word to my FF spelling dictionary so that I don’t the nasty red line underneath…)

  80. 80.

    Ted

    When you offer too much health care and other services for free there will always be deadbeats that consume more than they need.

    We have “deadbeat” veterans?? Huh. And here I thought their life-risking service warranted quality health care for life.

    I guess the top 2% couldn’t be asked to part with that $1.4 trillion tax cut. After all, they’re essential to winning the biggest, most important war in the history of civilization.

  81. 81.

    BettyPageisaBlonde

    Serious, Samrt, Strong & Lambchop (And Douchebag and Bloward) say the following:

    Splellcheckers are for pussbags. BDS is a a a a thing. And I’ve got links! And stuff. And, um,,,, BDS means other things too! Like, um,,,, stupid comma, Big Dick Syndronme! Yeah, where it is too big! And stuff!

    And,,, vetrans are happy people who have all the hot dogs they need! And,,, umm, painkillers! They KILL the pain!

    We can also rpresent you at trail too!

  82. 82.

    Perry Como

    When do we get a post about the historic agreement between the US and North Korea that returns us to where we were 6 years ago? Except now North Korea has nukes.

    Strong. Smart.

  83. 83.

    Richard 23

    I guess the top 2% couldn’t be asked to part with that $1.4 trillion tax cut. After all, they’re essential to winning the biggest, most important war in the history of civilization.

    Yeah, punish the successful. The liberal way: reverse natural selection.

    I hope you make this your campaign slogan, kooks.

    BettyPageisaBlonde Says:

    Whatever. She had black hair, weirdo.

  84. 84.

    Ted

    Yeah, punish the successful. The liberal way: reverse natural selection.

    Hey, if this war is so critical to our national survival (which of course it isn’t), the billionaires won’t mind if we preserve their royal way of life by repealing a few tax cuts.

  85. 85.

    Richard 23

    Hey, if this war is so critical to our national survival…

    then we ought to encourage the strongest of us to survive.

    Weakest or unemployed, if you’re a neorad.

  86. 86.

    Sherard

    Ridiculous. The entire federal budget could EASILY withstand an administrative hit of at LEAST 2%. Nothing like a little faux outrage.

  88. 88.

    numbskull

    Dick 23 says

    then we ought to encourage the strongest of us to survive.

    Heh. I remember reading Atlas Shrugged in junior high, too. Hopefully you’ll figure out what a pile of crap it is by the time you graduate high school. In the meantime, ponder your own lack of logic: Why would “the strongest” need any encouragement to survive?

  90. 90.

    Otto Man

    The entire federal budget richest 0.1% of Americans could EASILY withstand an administrative hit a rollback of their tax cuts of at LEAST 2%. Nothing like a little faux outrage.

    Fixed.

  92. 92.

    Zifnab

    then we ought to encourage the strongest of us to survive.

    That’s ridiculous. I thought Republicans believed in Intelligent Design? Or at least… design. The first part the board is still out on.

  93. 93.

    Sojourner

    The Decider doesn’t decide on decisions by looking at polls, moonbat. And those “polls” are from the liberal MSM. How “honest” of you to omit that point.

    No shit. He thinks G-d is guiding him. My point was that so-called lefty positions have now become mainstream. Remember November?

    Please point me towards the “liberal” MSM, such as CNN (Glen Beck), ABC (Mark Halperin, Glen Beck), MSNBC (Carlson, Scarborough, Tweety), Fox News (enough said).

    Only suckers still buy into righty claims of liberal bias.

  94. 94.

    tBone

    It’s just amazing how hilariously bad and embarrassing the whole thing is—I just don’t see how you could write a more damning parody of a book that Bill O’ would write.

    You should hear excerpts from the audiobook version, read by the author. It’s unintentionally hilarious, and there’s a scene in there that shows that Loofah Bill definitely has a thing about showers.

  95. 95.

    tBone

    No shit. He thinks G-d is guiding him.

    I suppose you’d rather have a goat-sacrificing pagan for a leader, moonbat? Please, shout it from the rooftops so everyone can see just how extreme you really are.

  96. 96.

    Sojourner

    I suppose you’d rather have a goat-sacrificing pagan for a leader, moonbat? Please, shout it from the rooftops so everyone can see just how extreme you really are.

    Another insightful missive from the faith-based community.

  97. 97.

    demimondian

    Another insightful missive from the faith-based community.

    Ah, Soj. Welcome back.

    I don’t know if you’re trolling the trolls or not, but, either way, welcome back.

  99. 99.

    Ellison, Ellensburg, Ellers, and Lambchop

    And what this chowderhead, EEEL, refuses to acknowledge is that the mortality rate in combat is down SIGNIFICANTLY due to an increased capacity to keep what would formerly be KIA soldiers in past wars alive.

    Gosh, I’m just a “chowderhead,” but even I know that mortality rates are almost entirely irrelevant to funding the VA. The gross number of wounded and the VA caseloads are far more significant.

    During the war on terror, the VA caseload for medical services increased by 22%, from 4.1M in 2001 to 5.3M in 2005 (last stats available). Bush increased the VA budget for medical services during that time by 83%. “B-B-B-But Bush hates the soldiers and doesn’t respect them and doesn’t care about the wounded!” If you’re dumb enough to believe that, look at the 2008 budget — he’s got a funny way of showing it.

    “The administration is again demonstrating that funding a nation at war includes caring for her warriors when they return home,” said Gary Kurpius, a Vietnam veteran from Anchorage, Alaska, who leads the 2.4 million-member Veterans of Foreign Wars of the U.S. and its Auxiliaries.

    Released today was an $87 billion proposal for the VA that includes an increase in discretionary medical care funding to $34.2 billion, or almost $3 billion more than last year’s request, with significant increases in mental health care, and additional funding to help reduce a VA backlog that currently exceeds more than 870,000 claims.

    By the way, the VA reports that case backlog (like what happened in the unfortunate case you linked) is also down in the Bush years, despite the additional personnel coming through the system — backlog has been cut by 20% since 2001.

  100. 100.

    ChristieS

    Richard 23, I’m breaking from my normal practice of staying clear of nasty attacks, but buddy…you’ve earned it with this quote.

    When you offer too much health care and other services for free there will always be deadbeats that consume more than they need. I think it’s wise to cut excess funding to get down to the right level as opposed to the Democrat party that thinks the answer to everything is more money, tax and spend, and all that.

    Too much, healthcare…too much healthcare…TOO MUCH HEALTHCARE! You pustulant boil on the face of our country. THESE ARE VETS OF THE UNITED GODDAMNED STATES OF AMERICA!!!!!

  101. 101.

    Jessica

    Apparently according to Republicans, the “right level” of healthcare is the level at which those who have the greatest amount of need just go die or live under a bridge, and stop wasting money that could go to perfectly good plasma TVs and McMansions and stock portfolios of companies whose products are all made in China.

    Personal responsibility, you know.

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