Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

“woke” is the new caravan.

They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

Republican speaker of the house Mike Johnson is the bland and smiling face of evil.

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

A consequence of cucumbers

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

The republican caucus is covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

It’s not hopeless, and we’re not helpless.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Republicans don’t lie to be believed, they lie to be repeated.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

Republicans seem to think life begins at the candlelight dinner the night before.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

I’m pretty sure there’s only one Jack Smith.

Marge, god is saying you’re stupid.

People are complicated. Love is not.

Fight for a just cause, love your fellow man, live a good life.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

Speaking of republicans, is there a way for a political party to declare intellectual bankruptcy?

Never forget that he train is barreling down on Trump, even as he dances on the tracks.

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22Comments

  4. 4.

    4tehlulz

    Frightening usually. At mine, the person who put it together announced to the gathering the existence of a previously unknown; apparently, the 4tehlulz ancestor that came from Ireland had an affair soon after he got off the boat.

  5. 5.

    Zifnab

    apparently, the 4tehlulz ancestor that came from Ireland had an affair soon after he got off the boat.

    Hey, get off my dingy!

  6. 6.

    The Grand Panjandrum

    Looking to pick up chicks, eh?

    It was the first thing that popped into my mind. But, I would NEVER stoop that … never mind.

    I hope its not like my reunions where alcohol, guns and 4WD vehicles always give evidence as to why we should all belong to MENSA. Or not.

    Have a good’un, JC.

  7. 7.

    Punchy

    I’m always the designated lifeguard at our family reunions.
    Apparently my relatives either lack the ability to swim or possess an outstanding ability to act like they’re drowning.

    Who’s bloggin in your absence? Can we get Jake please? PLEASE?

  11. 11.

    Brachiator

    Off to a Cole family reunion. Thirty to forty people who share my bloodline. Should be entertaining.

    Or frightening.

    Here’s a little Rodney Dangerfield:

    I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

    I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.

  13. 13.

    Tsulagi

    Thirty to forty people who share my bloodline.

    Probably all living within a five block radius, right? Sorry, couldn’t resist.

    When my family manages to have a reunion, we look like the freaking United Nations. My family on both sides has long been equal opportunity fuckers. A proud family tradition I did my utmost to uphold until the SO. Guess we’re sort of the anti-WVs.

  15. 15.

    cmorenc

    What’s particuarly frightening about family reunions is to rediscover just how vastly your situation and worldview has diverged from people who closely share ancestry and DNA. In some cases, it even seems appropriate to measure the gap in light-years, since some “relatives” seem to now inhabit an entirely different planet than the one you know. In other cases, the discomfort is for quite the opposite reason – damn! you haven’t escaped some unsettling family resemblances or traits nearly as much as you’d somehow convinced yourself you had.

  16. 16.

    jake

    When my family manages to have a reunion, we look like the freaking United Nations. My family on both sides has long been equal opportunity fuckers.

    Heh. Same here. For extra fun I’m probably the least liberal person in my family. Nothing spells a-m-u-s-m-e-n-t like five little old ladies of various hues expressing their opinion of Bush2.

  17. 17.

    RSA

    Thirty to forty people who share my bloodline.

    That’s a lot of vampires at one time; keep an eye out for anemia.

  18. 18.

    Genine

    I find it fascinating when families get together- on purpose.

    Mine doesn’t, and there are good reasons for that. So I am always riveted at the family gatherings of other people. I like to observe the undercurrents and the interactions. Its great stuff!

  20. 20.

    jake

    Well, I didn’t have to put up with Close Encounters of the K^3^ kind.

    Seeing my grand-parents return fire probably didn’t help either. ;-p

  21. 21.

    Tsulagi

    When my family manages to have a reunion, we look like the freaking United Nations. My family on both sides has long been equal opportunity fuckers.

    Heh. Same here. For extra fun I’m probably the least liberal person in my family. Nothing spells a-m-u-s-m-e-n-t like five little old ladies of various hues expressing their opinion of Bush2.

    In mine, while there are one or two toward the farther ends of the political spectrum, the large majority of my family leans center-right. Fairly conservative, but not the Party of Bush 28%ers joke version.

    When I told my dad I had contributed more than a dollar or two to ACLU, he couldn’t have looked more bewildered if I’d told him I’d just returned from Mars hanging out with Jesus who appointed me his 13th disciple. That was fun.

  22. 22.

    skippy

    i vote for frightening. the thing about family reunions is you’re stuck with a bunch of strangers whose only excuse for being together is someone else’s sexual encounters.

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