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Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls 2 years from now.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

There are more Russians standing up to Putin than Republicans.

Let there be snark.

Someone should tell Republicans that violence is the last refuge of the incompetent, or possibly the first.

It is not hopeless, and we are not helpless.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

Sometimes the world just tells you your cat is here.

In my day, never was longer.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

Stop using mental illness to avoid talking about armed white supremacy.

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Giving in to doom is how authoritarians win.

You are here: Home / Politics / Politicans / Lies, Damned Lies, and Sarah Palin / Zombie lies and the liberal media

Zombie lies and the liberal media

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Sheryl Gay Stolberg in in the liberal New York Times pimps the marsh mouse myth:

Mr. Gingrich sees the stimulus bill as his party’s ticket to a revival in 2010, as Republicans decry what they see as pork-barrel spending for projects like marsh-mouse preservation.

Update: I’m late to the party, I see. Greg Sargent has more:

It turns out, however, that earlier drafts of the story did describe the claim as “misleading” — but Times editors removed that description from the copy, leaving the assertion to stand on its own. An email from the author of the story to a reader confirms this.

Reader Interactions

80Comments

  1. 1.

    Joshua Norton

    Republicans decry what they see as pork-barrel spending for projects like marsh-mouse preservation.

    They’ve gone from zero to full-throated swamp fever in 30 days. That has to be some kind of speed record for total political melt down.

  2. 2.

    Delia

    See, if you’re not born stupid, you have to pass a stupidity test to stay in the party. Rush administers it.

  3. 3.

    LittlePig

    They just won’t die. I called a radio show today (something I rarely do) because the usually sane guy was pushing that "Fannie and Freddie caused the mortgage crisis" crap. I politely told him both the money amounts and the timeline don’t jibe with that. "You need to check your facts", he says. I said even if *all* of $2T F&F mortgages were bad, that still doesn’t account for the money amounts he had just mentioned ("tens of trillions"). "I just can’t talk to people like you *click*".

    Sigh.

  4. 4.

    JGabriel

    … pork-barrel spending for projects like marsh-mouse preservation.

    Are marsh mice really best preserved in pork barrels?

    Formaldehyde would be a better option, unless it’s for eatin’ – then plastic vacuum packing is the best choice.

    .

  5. 5.

    MikeJ

    Formaldehyde would really be a better option, unless it’s for eatin’ – then plastic vacuum packing is the best choice.

    You haven’t had marsh mouse until you’ve done it sous vide.

  7. 7.

    demkat620

    Seriously, how do they just keep moving from one bullshit story to the next?
    Don’t any of them ever stop to think? WTF?

  8. 8.

    Ed Drone

    I can’t wait till a high-speed train of marsh-mice from Disneyland to Las Vegas gets derailed by a sudden and unexpected volcanic eruption.

    Ed

  9. 9.

    jwb2005

    Seriously, how do they just keep moving from one bullshit story to the next?
    Don’t any of them ever stop to think? WTF?

    If they did, they wouldn’t be able to live with themselves.

  10. 10.

    Martin

    I think this is what made Jindal’s speech so bad. Obama stayed at a high level – big programs, big plans, big idea. Jindal’s $140M ‘volcano monitoring’ was jarring because it wouldn’t even have been a big issue in many state budgets, and if that’s the biggest opposition he can come up with in a national speech against almost $1.5T in bank bailout and stimulus spending, then why would anyone care about Republican concerns?

    The marsh mouse, the train (and they don’t even object to the train, just the destination of the train), volcano monitoring, etc. – they are just totally out of their depth. They’re throwing pebbles at tanks and wondering why nobody takes them seriously.

  11. 11.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    Despite the fact that the marsh mouse story is complete fiction, what the fuck is wrong with saving a species on the brink of extinction? I mean really, we human being have been responsible for the extinction of so many species I would think that in our enlightened times we would do anything and everything to stop yet another species becoming extinct. We are not gods, everything we do has some sort of effect on our world. The Marsh Mouse might well feed on something that feeds on something that effects our food supply. Bees are under attack right now, they are dying in great numbers, no one seems to give a shit, and yet a very wise man once said "if we lose the bees I give the human race four years" Mice matter, bugs matter,butterflies matter, and anyone who does’nt acknowlege this fact is a fucking moron to be honest.

  12. 12.

    themis

    Don’t any of them ever stop to think? WTF?

    They can’t – they would be subject to the great purity purge of 2009.

    Sometimes the comedy just writes itself.

  14. 14.

    jayackroyd

    To be fair, she has said that she said that this was "misleading" in her original copy, which was edited out.

  15. 15.

    Comrade Stuck

    Republicans decry what they see as pork-barrel spending for projects like marsh-mouse preservation.

    They won’t be laughing so much when Homeless Marsh Mice march in the Gweat Willard Wingnut Weckoning.

  16. 16.

    Lev

    Newt Gingrich’s Daily List of American Solutions (part 21 of 46)*:

    465. Change the country’s temperature measurements from the Fahrenheit scale to the Rankine scale, which sets 0 degrees at absolute zero and doesn’t mesh with that commie metric system that Europe uses.

    466. Switch toilet paper at all government buildings to single-ply. So-called treehuggers that use twice the trees to make the same amount of toilet paper! We’ll show them…

    467. Pass a bill that forces members of Congress to refer to earmarks as "pork patties", defense cuts as "pig entrails" and tax hikes as "pig shit". What representative will want to load up his district with pig shit? Nobody, that’s who!

    468. Replace all government cell phones with satellite phones. This is what REAL FUCKING INNOVATION looks like.

    469. Have every Social Security office display the Ten Commandments.

    470. Cut the capital gains tax.

    471. See #470

    472. Declare the first Sunday of every October to be Steven Seagal day.

    473. Overhaul the census bureau and get rid of sampling.

    *How’d I do? As well as the real Gingrich?

  17. 17.

    Martin

    Bees are under attack right now, they are dying in great numbers, no one seems to give a shit, and yet a very wise man once said "if we lose the bees I give the human race four years"

    If bees were meant to survive, God would have equipped them better when he made them.

    But yeah, conservatives used to care about such things as not fucking with the environment fearing the consequences, and then they all went insane with Jesus fever.

    And yes, Safari 4 is teh win.

  19. 19.

    themis

    @Lev:

    468. Replace all government cell phones with satellite phones. This is what REAL FUCKING INNOVATION looks like.

    But but but… we can’t do that. It would require more satellites in space and (gasp) we’d have to launch them and (gasp) then we’d have to fund NASA and then (gasp) that’s not a taxcut!

    /Newtwhinybaby

    Otherwise, spot on.

  20. 20.

    Comrade Stuck

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    "if we lose the bees I give the human race four years" Mice matter

    The Great Pollinators. Besides being a vital link in food production, Ganja will never be the same.

  21. 21.

    El Cid

    If you’re going to come up with bullshit, untrue ‘pork’ spending allegations against Democrats, is ‘preserving marsh mice’ the best you can come up with?

    I mean, if it’s mice you want, how about "Nancy Pelosi’s special stimulus program to have San Francisco scientists teach gay field mice to cook organic Muslim tofu for Saul Alinsky ACORN offices!"

  22. 22.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    @Martin:

    These fucking wingnuts are so far removed from the fact of things that hey have got themselves into a bind. If we lose the bees, if we lose the fucking bees we are well and truly fucked, crops will not be polinated, which basically mean no vegetables, ever, at all. No vegetables ever, which also means that there is no hay for the cattle, which means there is no meat, which means that the entire human race is doomed to starve. Why the fuck don’t these people make the connection?

  23. 23.

    bootlegger

    Not to mention that the fucking bill never earmarked money for that. The is money targeted at that kind of activity, for which scientists could apply for the purpose of saving the yummy mouse. Ditto for the train from Disney to Vegas, there is no earmark for it, only money that can the states can apply for that includes these kinds of projects.

    They prefer to distract you with their left hand while the Right hand is masturbating under the rain coat.

  26. 26.

    Martin

    Why the fuck don’t these people make the connection?

    God created the Earth for Americans 6,000 years ago, and will always provide for us. If the bees die off, then the commie vegan liberals will lose their arugula and will be forced to eat BBQ. It’s all God’s plan, you know.

  27. 27.

    Ella in NM

    @Ed Drone:

    I can’t wait till a high-speed train of marsh-mice from Disneyland to Las Vegas gets derailed by a sudden and unexpected volcanic eruption.

    Make that a high-speed train of marsh-mice who recently quit a gang and just got their tatoos removed for free traveling from Disneyland to Las Vegas gets derailed by a sudden and unexpected volcanic eruption.

    theplumline.whorunsgov.com/political-media/conservatives-hit-dems-over-tattoo-removal-pork-but-its-a…

  28. 28.

    Conservatively Liberal

    Besides being a vital link in food production, Ganja will never be the same.

    Indoor pot growers don’t need bees! Though we may be still be able to get stoned there will be no munchies if the bees disappear. That would be depressing.

    . . . what the fuck is wrong with saving a species on the brink of extinction?

    Manifest Destiny Bitches!

    /wingnut

  29. 29.

    themis

    @El Cid:

    I’d love to see what they would say in response to some of their own’s ideas for the stimulus.

    In Clermont County, Mike Budzynski of Loveland requested $100 million to build a "120-foot solid gold statue" of Obama in the middle of the city, which he called "Obama d’Or."

    "This way everyone can bow down to the great savior and realize that without him and government our lives would have no meaning," Budzynski wrote. "I want to make it in Gold because I want to show that government spending has no bounds and all of our prayers for free jobs safe from layoff, 0 percent home loans, free gas, and free medical care for every person on Earth."

    To add further insult, this happens to have the added benefit of being true.

    (I hope I linked correctly… sorry if I didn’t)

  30. 30.

    nikita

    Off topic I know but watching Stevie Wonder at the Whitehouse on PBS. What a genius. Love, love, love "Sir Duke".

  31. 31.

    Ivan Ivanovich Renko

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    Just to be the pedantic bastard I always wanted to be– if we lose the bees, we won’t lose the human species.

    Man is too adaptable; an omnivore with a truly phenomenal range of potential foodstuffs.

    The species wouldn’t go extinct– but we would lose our high energy civilization, coupled with a major die-back due to famine and warfare.

    Some of us would survive– their lives nasty, brutish and short, but they will survive nonetheless.

    Jesus, I need a drink.

  32. 32.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @Steve: OMFG.. so all this time we been wonderin’ if the liberal writers or conservative publishers had more influence, it’s been the goddamned editors??

  36. 36.

    Comrade Stuck

    @themis:

    That explains Velveeta

    Hey now. I lived on Velveeta in college. That and a little John Barleycorn. Well, a lot of JB actually. Nutrition out the yazoo!

  38. 38.

    Tonal Crow

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    …if we lose the fucking bees we are well and truly fucked, crops will not be polinated, which basically mean no vegetables, ever, at all.

    We indeed will be well GOPed in that case, but we won’t lose all vegetables. We will lose most production of many tree fruits (which includes nuts), and lots of other crops like strawberries and raspberries. Some green vegetables (e.g., salad greens) will be OK. See beeculture.com/content/pollination_handbook/ for much more detail.

    …which also means that there is no hay for the cattle,

    Incorrect. Grasses are wind-pollinated.

    which means there is no meat, which means that the entire human race is doomed to starve.

    Incorrect. We can get along just fine on vegetables, many of which will still be available if honeybees disappear. BTW, the major grains (wheat: gmo-compass.org/eng/safety/environmental_safety/188.wheat.html , rice: gmo-compass.org/eng/safety/environmental_safety/189.rice.html , corn: gmo-compass.org/eng/safety/environmental_safety/182.maize.html ) are wind-pollinated, are are soybeans. beeculture.com/content/pollination_handbook/soy.html

  39. 39.

    TenguPhule

    if we lose the bees, we won’t lose the human species.

    Wanna bet?

    Unless our entire species can survive on a diet of mushrooms and seafood, we’d starve.

    Okay scratch that, we would survive. But we’d be better off dead.

  40. 40.

    themis

    @TenguPhule:

    It does explain Red Clam Chowder.

    I thought that was just chunky Clamato… but at least it’s not the petroleum product that is Velveeta.

    @Comrade Stuck: I’m glad you survived. Heck, I’m amazed you survived.

  41. 41.

    TenguPhule

    They prefer to distract you with their left hand while the Right hand is masturbating under the rain coat.

    Actually the right hand is trying to pick your wallet which it seems to believe is buried deep in your ass. And it’s wearing a chafing iron glove.

  43. 43.

    TenguPhule

    but at least it’s not the petroleum product that is Velveeta.

    Velveeta is a key ingredient in delicious fudge and soup.

    And I’m sorry but nothing explains Haggis except that the Scotts are a bunch of fucking sick and ax crazy bastards.

  44. 44.

    Tonal Crow

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    …if we lose the fucking bees we are well and truly fucked, crops will not be polinated, which basically mean no vegetables, ever, at all.

    We indeed will be well GOPed in that case, but we won’t lose all vegetables. We will lose most production of many tree fruits (which includes nuts), and lots of other crops like strawberries and raspberries. Some green vegetables (e.g., salad greens) will be OK. See beeculture.com/content/pollination_handbook/ for much more detail.

    …which also means that there is no hay for the cattle,

    Incorrect. Grasses are wind-pollinated.

    which means there is no meat, which means that the entire human race is doomed to starve.

    Incorrect. We can get along just fine on vegetables (with B12 supplements), many of which will still be available if honeybees disappear. BTW, the major grains (wheat , rice, corn) are wind-pollinated. Soybeans are self-pollinated.

  45. 45.

    themis

    @TenguPhule: OK, now it’s time to defend your statements:)

    I get the Velveeta-soup relationship (texture), but fudge? I can only believe that you’re not referring to the chocolaty kind, but rather to the kind I prefer to not think about during dinner.

    And haggis is wonderful, if prepared correctly. Although I do love me some crazy Scots… sticks and all.

  46. 46.

    Laura W

    @nikita: Thanks! Just flipped over. I HATE how damn happy in love that First Couple is. Make me sick.
    Good Lord, lookit Michelle’s green dress. Have the men in this thread seen her in that dress yet?

  47. 47.

    TenguPhule

    I get the Velveeta-soup relationship (texture), but fudge?

    Yeah, I’m not making this up.

    It actually tastes really good. The velveeta gives it a creamy texture and you’d never know it was there unless somone told you.

    Calorie rich as all hell though.

  48. 48.

    WyldPirate

    @Litlebritdifrnt"balloon-juice.com/?p=17827#comment-1161659"

    These fucking wingnuts are so far removed from the fact of things that hey have got themselves into a bind. If we lose the bees, if we lose the fucking bees we are well and truly fucked, crops will not be polinated, which basically mean no vegetables, ever, at all.

    Yeah…and we’re losing bats, too.

    Tens of thousands of hibernating bats have died since New York Department of Environmental Conservation biologists identified white-nose syndrome west of Albany, N.Y., in February 2006. Biologists with state and federal agencies and organizations across the country are trying to find the answer to this deadly mystery.

  50. 50.

    Bubblegum Tate

    OT: Are there any CPAC infiltrators out there? I’d hate to think we’re missing out on all the unintentional comedy that lies therein.

  51. 51.

    Calouste

    @Litlebritdifrnt:

    You would indeed think that good Christians would look after God’s Creation and not let all the hard work that He put into Intelligently Designing all those little animals and plants go to waste. Evil evolutionists of course would of course just see the mice die out because it’s survival of the fittests you know.

    Funnily enough things are just the other way around and the ones who are supposed to be compassionate are not even faking it.

  54. 54.

    TenguPhule

    And haggis is wonderful, if prepared correctly.

    The only correct way to prepare it is to never start at all. >;P

  56. 56.

    TenguPhule

    Haggis is just a big sausage with a more inventive casing.

    And filling designed by the Spanish Inquisition.

  60. 60.

    nikita

    @Laura W:

    I know! They do seem disgustingly happy. I love that they are really opening up the whitehouse so much. Cocktail hour on Wednesdays and Stevie Wonder concerts. I wonder who I’d have to bribe to get tickets to a WH event?

  62. 62.

    Joshua Norton

    I get the Velveeta-soup relationship (texture), but fudge?

    Hmm. I take it you’re not that familiar with the barfable recipes that Kraft has been churning out over the years. Doing things with prunes, cream cheese and mini marshmallows and such. I recall that they had one recipe for Eggs Benedict make with Miracle Whip that would have gagged a goat.

    K-R-A-F-T * buuurp *

  64. 64.

    Comrade Stuck

    Not to worry. As long as we have Corn (wing blowed poll) and chemical factories we can survive just fine of High Fructose Corn Syrup and Yellow Die # 5. We practically do now.

  68. 68.

    Mike in NC

    God created the Earth for Americans 6,000 years ago, and will always provide for us. If the bees die off, then the commie vegan liberals will lose their arugula and will be forced to eat BBQ. It’s all God’s plan, you know.

    CPAC has a round table on this very subject tomorrow. Tinfoil hats will be issued at the door.

  69. 69.

    LaDonne

    Just like with the honey bee thing.

    These people want the entire system to collapse. Then tax cuts for everyone!

  70. 70.

    Comrade Kevin

    @TenguPhule:

    It actually tastes really good. The velveeta gives it a creamy texture and you’d never know it was there unless somone told you.
    Calorie rich as all hell though.

    I could see using cream cheese, but velveeta? Ick.

  71. 71.

    TenguPhule

    I could see using cream cheese, but velveeta? Ick.

    Try it before you scoff. You’d be surprised.

    Not like say, Haggis, which I have seen, smelt, tasted and immediately vomited.

  73. 73.

    DougL

    No, if bees disappear, it won’t be the end of the human race. As a matter of fact, GOOD NEWS! The exciting new career field of
    human plant-pollinating     will help get this country back on its feet by drastically reducing unemployment!

  74. 74.

    AnneLaurie

    The MSU dairy farms used to (probably still do) sell blocks of what they called "chocolate cheese", which was essentially a very rich fudge product. So you could presumably make up a batch of ‘Velveeta fudge’ using actual food-grade cheese, and get something worth eating. But only in very small cubes at a time, because never mind calories, the stuff was wonderful but you could feel it coating your tastebuds on the first bite!

  75. 75.

    TenguPhule

    I mean how bad can bad can sheep stomach taste?

    If you have to ask, consider yourself fortunate.

  76. 76.

    Damned at Random

    I figured out the marsh mouse connection in the recovery bill. There is money (250 mil if memory serves me) set aside for flood prevention programs, of which up to 30 million can be spent by a single state. The assumption by the right is that the entire 30 mil will be spent by California on the San Francisco wetlands and so the true beneficiary is not the city (which will receive flood protection as the wetands soak up excess water) or San Francisco Bay water quality (wetlands purify storm runoff before releasing it into the bay), but the lowly salt marsh harvest mouse and other denisens of the wetlands.

    The trick was not to search on "salt marsh harvest mouse", or "mouse" or "endangered species", but by searching to "$30,000,000 – the figure Hannity and co have been shouting about for the past month.

  77. 77.

    Don

    No, if bees disappear, it won’t be the end of the human race. As a matter of fact, GOOD NEWS! The exciting new career field of
    human plant-pollinating will help get this country back on its feet by drastically reducing unemployment!

    I have started my re-employment training by practicing rubbing my ass on all the flowers in the park near my home.

  78. 78.

    gwangung

    I figured out the marsh mouse connection in the recovery bill. There is money (250 mil if memory serves me) set aside for flood prevention programs, of which up to 30 million can be spent by a single state. The assumption by the right is that the entire 30 mil will be spent by California on the San Francisco wetlands and so the true beneficiary is not the city (which will receive flood protection as the wetands soak up excess water) or San Francisco Bay water quality (wetlands purify storm runoff before releasing it into the bay), but the lowly salt marsh harvest mouse and other denisens of the wetlands.

    So the Right is against efficiency?

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