Predict which portion of Obama’s speech will cause the greatest freak-out among the usual suspects.
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by John Cole| 97 Comments
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Come for the politics, stay for the snark.
Let me file that under fuck it.
The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.
When the time comes to make an endorsement, the pain of NYT editors will be palpable as they reluctantly whisper “Biden.”
I also would like a pony to improve my balloon juice experience.
Republicans are radicals, not conservatives.
Nothing says ‘pro-life’ like letting children go hungry.
A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.
The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.
Republicans do not pay their debts.
If you are in line to indict donald trump, stay in line.
The lights are all blinking red.
Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.
Consistently wrong since 2002
Fani Willis claps back at Trump chihuahua, Jim Jordan.
I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.
I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.
When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.
Fundamental belief of white supremacy: white people are presumed innocent, minorities are presumed guilty.
Bogus polls are all they’ve got left. Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls a year from now.
It’s a doggy dog world.
Republican also-rans: four mules fighting over a turnip.
“What are Republicans afraid of?” Everything.
Chutkan laughs. Lauro sits back down.
You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.
joe from Lowell
The fact that Barack Obama is giving it.
SadOldVet
With the assistance of the highly educated staff at Fox News, we have determined the following from his speech.
If you take the 7th word of the 2nd paragraph and the 11th word of the 4th paragraph and the 15th word of the 6th paragraph and the 3rd word of the 7th paragraph and the 27th word of the 8th paragraph and the 2nd word of the 10th paragraph and the 6th word of the 12th paragraph and the 21st word of the 14th paragraph, it clears states:
“I am a Muslim and I hate America”
drunken hausfrau
What Sad Old Vet said.
Oh, and calling the Koran “holy” — like the bible or the torah.
And saying their is Islam woven into the fabric of America — heads exploded on that bit.
R-Jud
Pick only one section; are you kidding me? It’s like the whole thing– the content, the speaker, the setting– was calculated to burst blood vessels all over Wingnuttia.
So, you know, I thought it was teriffic.
cleek
what joe from Lowell said.
they’re mad that a Dem is president, so anything that Dem does is the worst thing ever.
NLB
Quoting from the Qur’an first — and not the Bible.
wilfred
1) Saying ‘the Holy Qur’an’, and pronouncing Qur’an correctly;
2) Almost pronouncing al-qaida correctly, or even trying;
3) Saying Assalam Aleikum;
4) Saying ‘justice and prosperity’, not freedom and prosperity;
5) Recognizing Hamas – which is what everyone here is saying
6) Recognizing Islamic history in the US
Zifnab
He’ll be mocked for showing weakness by talking about peace and harmony. Then he’ll be blasted for abandoning Israel in her hour of greatest need, when the entire Terro-Muslim world is about to develop a massive stockpile of nuclear weapons for realzy real this time. And finally, he’ll be compared to both Neville Chamberline – for “appeasing” the evil muslims – and Adolf Hitler – for maybe not shaving often enough and growing a ‘stache or something.
Balconesfault
The most amusing has been pants wetting that Khamenei released a statement pre-speech saying how it wouldn’t change anything. Thus, proof that Obama was wasting his time.
Not like these morons can understand that Khamenei is scared that millions of Iranians are going to quit seeing America as “the Great Satan”, and that he at least understands that this speech is aimed directly at the Iranian elections coming up. As Joe said – it’s just that Obama is MAKING IT that gives them the vapors.
That, and the gnawing suspicion that they can’t voice – that Obama will succeed in the Middle East where Bush failed.
Lister
Those who call themselves Christians will be offended that our president talked about Moses, Jesus, and Mohammed praying together in Jerusalem. The others on the political right will zero in on his remarks about the Iraq war.
4tehlulz
Kung Fu star David Carradine found dead
The Moar You Know
Acknowledging that Muslims are human beings and not mobile targets for the greater glory of our armed forces.
Forgot the obvious: OMG PREZNITS A NEGRO MAN
bayville
I think it will be the portion that “wasn’t” in his speech that will drive the usual supsects crazy.
Like the fact that Obama didn’t announce that Israel is great to the masses. Cue up the Anti-Israel faux hysteria.
Bill E Pilgrim
“Any world order that elevates one nation over another will fail”.
It’s a slam dunk.
Any sentence that disputes that were the bestest, baddest, most wunnerful collection of human beings and I just want to say you’re all beautful and I don’t deserve this audience…
Oh sorry. With all the retro Wingnuttery about “chicks” and so on I somehow started chanelling the Rat Pack at 3 am somewhere in Vegas.
Crashman06
@Zifnab: Slate’s already on it. His speech strengthens Iran!
NLB
I also thought it was a phenomenal speech for many reasons besides the awesome-cherry-on-top of sure-to-come wingnut head explosions. It will obviously freak them out, because they are Republitards who are innately uncomfortable whenever the discourse is above “Dick and Jane” Bushisms.
Brick Oven Bill
Megalomania and teleprompters.
Oil and water.
Cats and dogs.
Litlebritdifrnt
Any time he spoke Arabic will do it SEEEEEEE TOLD YOU HE’S A DIRTY MUSLIN! Oh and the bit about the settlements in Palestine. Oh and quoting the Qur’an, oh never mind, what R-Jud said.
TheFountainHead - 'Easily Led'
I actually read thing whole thing–Sully has it up–and I have to say it was the most straightforward language and terms I have ever heard in a major foreign policy speech. I thought it was fantastic, which must mean that it was “TEH WORSTEST SPEECHIFICATION FROM A PREZNIT EVAH!”
matoko_chan
Cognitive dissonance from Cap’n Ed.
I doubt Bush would ever have gotten standing ovations or …
If I could remind Cap’n Clueless….Bush had a shoe thrown at him.
I see this desperate desire on the right to turn O into some sort of reprised Black Bush.
Creepy.
eric
“They” loved him. Isn’t that enough?
Eric
jp2
Speech was very, very well done. Prolly female literacy will piss em off most.
PeakVT
The speech has soon many points they don’t like they will be able to get 4-5 different fauxrages out of it over the next couple of weeks. Expect a series of “fact-checks” to pop up at Drudge and follow the usual path to respectability.
Bill E Pilgrim
Repeating from the other thread: I read it all an hour ago and thought it was absolutely brillant. You find yourself marveling how far away we got from this kind of intelligence.
I’m no worshipper by any means but I thought this was a fantastic speech.
MattF
Obama identified a set of issues: violent extremism, Israel, nuclear arms and Iran, democracy, religious freedom, women’s rights, economic opportunity, and what he called a “fear of modernity.” It wouldn’t surprise me if wingers take a good number of the items on that list… in a personal way.
Steve
Some say it was the worst speech ever.
Some also say that everyone working at Fox News is an irredeemable douchebag. “Some” in this case being me. I say that all the time.
YellowJournalism
Who (or what) killed Bill?! That’s terrible. I’ve enjoyed a lot of his recent work.
I’ve already been hearing people say that Obama pronounces Muslim terms and names too easily. (That stealth Muslim!) Expect more of that after today’s speech.
patrick
Last night, at dinner with friends, one of my fellows came in and sat down and said “Obama just said in his speech that America was a Muslim Nation!”.
This guy is an otherwise intelligent, highly educated, compassionate, kind and reasonable man.
When I asked if he he heard that on Rush, he said that he “got it in an email”.
When I pointed out that he hadn’t yet given his speech, and that he said “America could be considered one of the bigger Muslim nations” – meaning that we have a quite a few Muslims here in the good ol’ USofA, he got agitated and asked “Did he say that America wasn’t a Christian Nation?”
Their pointy little heads are already feverishly mincing words to find something – anything – to gnash their teeth and rend their garments over.
They will take that “considered” quote and parse it out into “ZOFG! He’s going to turn America over to Islamic Law!!!”
But when you point out that by the same kind of parsed, minced word logic, that America is, by definition, a secular nation (we have no religious requirements for citizenship or holding public office), they’ll freak smooth out.
I wish they would all DIAF.
wilfred
I don’t know about that. But certainly the criticism has been measured and reasonable, not hostile and inflammatory. From what I’ve heard so far there was a genuine appreciation for the effort and a feeling of the need to be genuine in return.
Courtesy, adab, is an important idea to Muslims, especially Arabs, And Obama showed plenty. It’s a nice change and I think he, an Americans, will receive the same, at least for the time being.
Insh’allah
Sumayya
OK, I’m Muslim, and that was awesome. No offense to anyone here, but I think you have to be Muslim to recognize how awesome it was. (OMG, I’m never going to be a Supreme Cour Justice now, am I?) He lanced a lot of boils (sorry about the unattractive image) for us and asked us not to be less Muslim, but to be better Muslims. Phenomenal. And although the Qur’an tells “the believing men and the believing women” to “lower their eyes”, he’s a bit of halal cheesecake, too.
Col. Klink
I think the part where he talked about the Death Star being fully operational.
Zifnab
@wilfred: I wish we could get the reasoned and educated coverage of a third world Middle Eastern country. *sigh* Maybe one day.
Bill E Pilgrim
“Klaatu Barada Nikto”
would be my guess.
Brick Oven Bill
This post contrasts Pompey’s Pillar with cigarettes. It is not widely known that human progress can end and regression can begin. Egypt is a good example of this, and Pompey’s Pillar can be seen as emblematic of Egypt.
Pompey’s Pillar is 30 meters in length, has a diameter of 2.7 meters, and weights 396 tons. It was constructed in 296AD from polished granite. How it was made vertical is a matter of mystery, although it seems to be one element of what was a much larger ancient building. The capital appears to be a takeoff on the Greek Corinthian Order.
I have travelled to Egypt during my time in the service. The US government was compelled to hire an Egyptian guide to ‘assist’ our unit. He refused to begin his well-paid duties until we gave him a carton of Marlboros (Reds). He unwrapped the cigarettes in our presence and deposited the wrappings on the floor.
“O Commander of the Faithful, permit me to march on Egypt. It will be a source of strength and sustenance for the Muslims. It is the richest of lands on earth.”
– Amr ibn al-Aas, 639AD, three hundred and forty three years after the raising of Pompey’s Pillar. Alexandria fell in 641AD. Per treaty, the wealth of the Egyptians was spared and the Muslims took the belongings of the Greeks and Romans (the Jizya).
linda
from the opening paragraph:
and a greeting of peace from Muslim communities in my country: assalaamu alaykum.
lololololololololol……….
donovong
Simple. They will bitch and complain about every word from “I,” the first word, to “you,” the last word of his speech, in a clusterfuck of inanity.
Hey, that rhymes at the end with asshole!
JenJen
Well, he had barely finished the speech before MSNBC invited a giddy Liz Cheney on to absolutely trash every single word he said. Her shrillness was giving me a bit of a migraine, so I’ll admit to not paying close attention, but I think she was trying to say that our new President is “naive” and an “apologist.”
It’s weird, because in eight years of Bush/Cheney, I just can’t recall a fierce opponent of that Administration being invited on the teevee to take the first cheap shots after every speech.
Same old shit, just a different day.
TheFountainHead - 'Easily Led'
@Col. Klink: I would think they would cheer that…
SGEW
A bit that jumped out at me, when reading the text, that kinda gets to the crux of why Obama is “anti-American” (emphasis added):
“One of”? Not the greatest nation evah?! Horrors!
Nuance. Drives the right wing crazy, every time.
Also: Obama touches on the wrongs committed by this country (the “war of choice” in Iraq, torture, the “role played” by the U.S. in the overthrow of Mosaddeq(!), etc.) but never actually apologizes, or acknowledges any national responsibility! It’s a nice rhetorical move, but it’s probably about the best we can hope for, I guess. [Has any American president ever publicly acknowledged the U.S. role in the Iranian coup d’etat before?]
Napoleon
@Bill E Pilgrim:
LMAO
Earl
Right off the bat by Joe from Lowell:
That is all you need read at this point…
Tattoosydney
@Brick Oven Bill:
Bob, are “Pompey’s Pillar” and “cigarettes” euphemisms? ’cause I found that post strangely erotic…
I have to go and wash myself with steel wool and bleach now.
slightly_peeved
I thought it was the bit where he simultaneously addressed religious conflict and the threat of nuclear weapons by saying that hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side. Kid.
strawmanmunny
This is off topic of the speech, but does anyone read Digby? I get a feeling she has a grudge against Obama from her writing. Does anybody else feel that way or is just my Obama love blinding me to anything critical said about him?
Tattoosydney
OMG. Obama said that he would try to speak the truth, but not that he would be conscious of God! He’s a secret atheist! Wait, no… he quoted the Koran. Secret Mooslim-Atheist!
Secret Mooslim-Atheist who wants to make our good Christian women wear burkas!
Bill H
@Brick Oven Bill:
That entire post is totally devoid of any sense at all. I think BOB is smoking something, and it isn’t Marlboro (reds).
gnomedad
@TheFountainHead – ‘Easily Led’:
Here.
Meanderthal
@4tehlulz:
Not dead. Just gone to walk the earth. RIP
Brick Oven Bill
Here is a good article about life in Egypt. The religious authorities used the swine flu scare to order the slaughter of Egyptian pigs, although there was no scientific basis for this action, as swine flu is transmitted from humans to humans, and not from pigs to humans.
Egyptian pigs are raised by Christian garbagemen. The garbagemen sort through the garbage alongside their pigs, who consume the organic matter contained in the garbage. As the garbagemen look for things of value in the collected garbage.
So anyway, the garbagemen with the pigs got angry with the religious authorities who ordered their pigs slaughtered for no good reason. Everybody is yelling at each other. There is a picture of a man carrying a pig in the link. The man appears to be not very compassionate about the pig’s feelings. There is also a picture of angry garbagemen.
Obama will likely fix this and make everybody happy. Perhaps Egypt will then get back into architecture.
Tattoosydney
@Brick Oven Bill:
I’m guessing that “pigs” is one of those euphemisms too, hey BOB?
Why don’t you just come out and say it?
Brick Oven Bill
I do believe that everything boils down to sex and power TattooSydney. That and perhaps food.
Comrade Dread
The part where he said that the Palestinians might sort of have a legitimate point about the whole occupation and bombing things being bad.
One can never acknowledge this in discussions of Middle East politics without setting off the whining chorus of wingnuts screaming anti-Semite.
Tattoosydney
@Brick Oven Bill:
What about dancing?
Brick Oven Bill
Dancing is a subset of power and a precursor of sex. So it does not count as a seperate item.
MattF
@strawmanmunny
I think Digby is deliberately irritating. You don’t come away from one of her posts with serene thoughts– but that’s the point.
jake 4 that 1
@joe from Lowell: And right off the bat we have a winner.
The speech was what, a hair under an hour. That’s 60 major freak outs right there. But we all know they’ll get distracted by something shiny, well before they get to 15.
Laura W
He’s totally under-dressed as he boards Air Force One for Germany.
His casual dress is very disrespectful to all Egyptians. Not to mention he jogged up the airplane stairs like a giddy schoolgirl.
And just like a giddy schoolgirl, I giggled loudly at the sight of his casually dressed back bounding up those stairs, trying to imagine Bush attempting it and not looking like the total buffoon he is. Obama just manages to wear almost everything well, visually at least.
ChrisB
@JenJen: Well, ABC had Sean Hannity for instant analysis after the speech and he dutifully reminded us that Obama had associated with the Rev. Jeremiah Wright for 20 years. I kid you not.
ChrisB
You mean they won’t say that partisan politics end at the water’s edge and that they wholeheartedly support our president’s leadership?
InflatableCommenter
@4tehlulz:
Very sad.
R.I.P.
InflatableCommenter
@Brick Oven Bill:
BOB still posting indecipherable gibberish.
Very sad.
Cat Lady
@ChrisB:
No.
SATSQ
Awesom0
Obama committed the awful, awful sin of giving a speech while being both black and liberal.
Egilsson
Hey John
Howard Kurtz approvingly cites Michelle Malkin’s claim that the army recruiter shooting was an example of media selectively ignoring “left wing terrorism” in contrast to Tiller’s murder.
The idea that a muslim prison convert fundamentist who shoots army people on the street is “left wing” just leaves me speechless. I’d say fundamentalist muslim beliefs aren’t actually “left wing”.
Can you please deliver a beatdown?
Thanks.
Scott de B.
This post appears (though god knows I could be wrong) to be implying that Egypt was powerful and technologically supreme until those evil Muslims came along.
I feel obliged to point out, however, that the magnificent building of which Pompey’s Pillar was originally a part was torn down by Christian zealots.
Bey
@Awesom0:
And president. That’s the worst evar.
mt
Hugh Hewitt is the go to guy for over-the-top analysis. Brief trip over to the Hewitt cesspool reveals melt down over the “deeply dishonest” speech that will cause our nation to shrivel up and die.
jcricket
Kill Bill, Part III :-(
bago
OT, but amusing: E3 is going on now. In order to promote a video game EA hired a firm to do some viral marketing for a title of theirs based on Dante’s Inferno. The results are hilarious.
There is the requisite shitty geocities website complete with the “Untitled Document” title and apostrophe typo, and actual protesters.
Highly amusing capalert level work.
jcricket
“Presidenting while black and liberal” is against the law in many states. They passed a ballot initiative a while back.
Montysano
Pammy over at Atlas Shrugs has a post up that totals 4,250 words. I will not read it or link to it, but she seems to be deeply disappointed that Obama’s speech went beyond “exterminate all the brutes”.
jake 4 that 1
@Egilsson: Suspect is black, ergo he must be liberal. Kew Ee Dee.
@mt: Hugh has gotten his balls and the nation mixed up again.
geemoney
I just drove home from work, which is right by the airport here in Dresden, and there are literally at least 3 police cars at every intersection. Crazy.
RememberNovember
@NLB:
Because, if God forbid an Islamic leader quoted from the Quran instead of say teh Bible on a visit to the US, the shite would go ballistic…
Calouste
I don’t watch TV, but has any network invited over a US muslim to comment on Obama’s speech? To give some more insight on what the impact of the speech would on, you know, its intended audience, the Muslim world? Or has it just been the usual Village circle-jerk?
Bill Belichick
I didn’t catch the whole thing. Did he mention mustard? If so there’s my vote.
Chuck Butcher
Why is Lynne Cheney important? Seriously, have we become that dependent on nepotism in this country? Why do we care about second hand Dick Cheney opinions when at the drop of a hat we can have them from the horse’s ass?
Andrea actually had the nerve to half-heartedly contradict her at one point – that ended quickly.
Ecks
Yes, possibly the only saving grace of Obama’s presidency is that he has chauffeurs now, so will at no point be guilty of a DWB.
Though, come to think of it, CWB might be worse.
TenguPhule
Because the new ass has tits and could run for office in the future.
Also, Lesbian is the new armor the GOP is testing.
RememberNovember
I want to see a Youtube of Lynne Cheney crying into the camera, saying
“Leave Dick Cheney alone!”
waaagghhhh
ET
Well according to Michael Rubin “Obama abandons Democracy”
RglrLrkr
@TenguPhule: Younger sister Mary is the one with the freedom-hatin’ unpatriotic sexual orientation. Media star du jour Liz has a dude hubby and everything a proper Repub woman should have. {In fact, I seem to recall that dude hubby had a position in the last Administration that allowed him to spike or otherwise thwart tighter safety and security regs on chemical and hazmat industrial facilities. I guess 9/11 didn’t change quite everything.}
A good ONION article title – “Younger Cheney daughter upset at being denied opportunity as Voice of Evil”.
Wile E. Quixote
matoko_chan
Yes, but what you don’t understand, and what Cap’n Ed does is that the shoe that was thrown at George W. Bush was a shoe of luvvvvvvvvvvvv.
Indylib
Slightly OT Apologies if someone upthread already linked to these,
but the pics of POTUS in Egypt, especially the one of him with the Sphinx in the background, are pretty cool.
Via TPM
Wile E. Quixote
@Brick Oven Bill
Jesus Bill, could you come out of the closet already and just admit to the world that you’re a big old submissive homosexual who’s looking for a leather daddy to walk him around on a leash and tenderly yet firmly lay a strap across his behind when he gets out of line? First you spend weeks posting about how Captain Sully Sullenberger should be made dictator over everything, then you start posting about how Captain Richard Phillips should be made dictator over everything (Does Sully Sullenberger know that you’ve thrown him over for someone new?) and now you’re posting about huge phallic objects and the mystery of how they were
erectedmade vertical. and how “…Dancing is a subset of power and a precursor of sex.”C’mon Bill, just give in, it’s OK to be gay. You’ll be much happier hanging around at the local leather bar wearing nothing but a studded dog collar, nipple rings and a pair of black leather chaps than you ever were hanging around those Glenn Beck get-togethers where the toothless lesbians were ripping the shirts off of the asian chicks and going at it and then going home to furtively watch Cruising for the umpteen millionth time. And for someone such as yourself, with those twin fetishes for authoritative men in uniform and phallic objects, well, you’ll never go hungry for either at a leather bar. Plus gay bars have kick-ass music and most of them, with the exception of the real meat markets, have great bartenders as well and are blessedly free of toothless lesbians and shirtless asian women.
ruemara
I predict the most contentious parts come between “Thank you for having me here” and “Thank you for listening”. Other than that, what’s to complain about besides the mooslofachiststealthkenyaist.
GranFalloon
I heard a whopper today.
Apparently, at some point, his middle name was used.
Of course, this set off a flurry of “why didn’t you use your middle name in the election?” among the pseudo-intellectuals.
I suppose this is important because . . . why? It proves the GOP right that Hussein is his middle name?
Tattoosydney
@Brick Oven Bill:
Bullshit. Dancing is an end (and a joy) in itself. The fact that you don’t understand that says a lot about you.
Jay C
It doesn’t really matter which part of Obama’s Cairo speech will freak out the wingnuts the most – surely as night follows day, they will, of course, find something “wrong” with it to become frothingly outraged over. And over. And over. But I’m willing to bet that, as surely as day follows night, that the net effect will be to make the President’s critics look small, cheap, shrill and stupidly partisan (not hard, though, considering where they start out) – and himself look bigger and wiser in the process.
It’s amazing: even given the low caliber of the Opposition, Barack Obama has this bizarre gift of being able to make himself look like Statemanlike even when delivering standard boilerplate speeches larded with commonplaces. Weird.
Mike in NC
B.O.B., you neglected to finish the story! A buddy and me once tried to bribe some gate guards in Karachi to let us take a shortcut through the shipyard with our lovely new carpets and leather goods. They kept the carton of Kents we handed them and made us take the long way ’round. Bastards. Didn’t speak “American” apparently.
HRA
Joe from Lowell said it all for me.
Chris B. Someone who watches Hannity so I don’t have to. Thanks. Rev. Wright?
Liz Cheney – I saw her face on the screen and kept walking by into the other rooms. Did I hear Romney and Cheney for 2012 or was it a dream?
I was suckered in to wait for the 12 pm airing on MSNBC. Talk about wanting to throw something at the TV. Nora ODonnell’s comments between segments and then commercials.
Mike in NC
Well, it’s not like he hard act to follow or anything.
Seanly
My prediction:
“Good afternoon, my name is Barack Hussein Obama and I am the president of the United States of America.”
@Brick Oven Bill:
Huhh? He unwrapped an entire carton of cigarettes right in front of you? What did he do with 200 loose cigarettes? Are you sure your crack unit didn’t hire this guy?
asiangrrlMN
@Sumayya: Thank you for chiming in with your point of view. I was listening to NPR, and I heard mixed reactions from Egyptian Muslims.
I haven’t listened to the speech yet, but I did hear him quote from the Qur’an. That would be my guess. Or, everything else listed here.
@Tattoosydney: Hi, fake hubby! Ya gotta admit that dancing can lead to sex. I agree, though, dancing, in and of itself, is a thrill.
JWW
John,
Who are the “usual suspects”? Do you care not to define or is it that anybody can have an opinion, but if it doesn’t agree with yours then it should be discarded.
Cain
Dammit, John, I was the last commenter before you closed the Obama speech thread. The irony was that the title was “who would have the biggest freakout” it turned out to be us! hahaha!!!
And my comment was the awesome, full of win.. you’ll never know it now.
cain
Wile E. Quixote
@cain
Oh yeah. Mine was better. It was all turgid and throbbing and ready to just let loose and coat the thread with a thick and gooey layer of win but then John closed things down.