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You are here: Home / The Ultimate Single Malt

The Ultimate Single Malt

by @heymistermix.com|  September 1, 20109:54 am| 49 Comments

This post is in: WTF?

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A drink that brings a new meaning to the phrase “tastes like piss” uses sugar from the urine of elderly diabetics. (via, where else, Slashdot)

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Previous Post: « Snowbilly Chronicles
Next Post: Glenn Beck is the Lich King »

Reader Interactions

49Comments

  1. 1.

    Svensker

    September 1, 2010 at 9:56 am

    Gah. Couldn’t you have waited until the afternoon to post this? Delicate morning stomach here.

  2. 2.

    kd bart

    September 1, 2010 at 9:58 am

    Well, there was a reason for the Beck rally afterall.

  3. 3.

    John PM

    September 1, 2010 at 9:59 am

    Soylent Schnaps is Seniors!

  4. 4.

    jwb

    September 1, 2010 at 10:01 am

    @Svensker: Seriously!

  5. 5.

    Punchy

    September 1, 2010 at 10:06 am

    College kids donate plasma, middle aged peeps donate old clothes, wrinklies pawning their piss. Huh. Brings a new meaning to “golden shower”.

  6. 6.

    Stephen1947

    September 1, 2010 at 10:07 am

    This is actually intended for John’s latest PayPal update – but for some reason I don’t get a comment box at the bottom of the thread. Anyway, when I read this yesterday – I definitely thought of John’s travails with a huge faceless bureaucorpocracy.

  7. 7.

    scav

    September 1, 2010 at 10:08 am

    Premptive eek! but could somebody please attend to the slashout issue in the latest Paypal thread? I’m left hanging on the Egregious details of Experion and I think I’m going to enjoy them. Ta.

  8. 8.

    Dr. O. W. Ludwig

    September 1, 2010 at 10:15 am

    There are over twenty bodily fluids present in the human body and I am proud to say I have tasted all of them.

  9. 9.

    maya

    September 1, 2010 at 10:23 am

    Now this puts recycling on the Cutty Sark edge.

  10. 10.

    Violet

    September 1, 2010 at 10:24 am

    Can a front pager edit the Paypal thread below? Someone used a dash and fuked the thread.

  11. 11.

    MoeLarryAndJesus

    September 1, 2010 at 10:30 am

    Finally, a drink fit for Dick Cheney.

  12. 12.

    Amir_Khalid

    September 1, 2010 at 10:32 am

    For some reason, I’m reminded of Harry Dean Stanton in Young Doctors in Love.

  13. 13.

    Comrade Javamanphil

    September 1, 2010 at 10:33 am

    @John PM: Win!

  14. 14.

    cleek

    September 1, 2010 at 10:35 am

    can’t help but think of Dune and the “stillsuits“.

  15. 15.

    kindness

    September 1, 2010 at 10:39 am

    So much for enjoying my morning coffee…..

    Now I gotta clean up my keyboard & monitor.

  16. 16.

    AxelFoley

    September 1, 2010 at 10:42 am

    A drink that brings a new meaning to the phrase “tastes like piss” uses sugar from the urine of elderly diabetics. (via, where else, Slashdot)

    lolwut?

  17. 17.

    R-Jud

    September 1, 2010 at 10:43 am

    Heh. “Slash” is British slang for a piss.

  18. 18.

    Mike in NC

    September 1, 2010 at 10:45 am

    @MoeLarryAndJesus:

    Finally, a drink fit for Dick Cheney.

    The New Republican Congress will replace unemployment benefits and health care with a weekly ration of this stuff.

  19. 19.

    Athenae

    September 1, 2010 at 10:45 am

    A British friend often refers to Fosters’ Australian beer as “Fosters: Australian for Piss.”

    I think I’ll stick to my Balvenie Double Wood, thank you. When I finally finish this fucking book I’m working on I am going to buy myself another bottle and spend an evening pleasantly knackered. You can feel that shit in your fingertips.

    A.

  20. 20.

    Loneoak

    September 1, 2010 at 10:53 am

    The paradox here is that if the water is purified then there is no difference between using cane sugar and tap water. So why do it? Either it is still piss or it is just a gimmick.

  21. 21.

    WereBear

    September 1, 2010 at 10:54 am

    @John PM: Love it!

  22. 22.

    slag

    September 1, 2010 at 10:58 am

    You’re just a ray of sunshine this morning, mistermix. First, Sideshow Sarah and now another bucket of piss to shake our heads at.

    PS Cleanup needed in comment 12 of the PayPal update thread.

  23. 23.

    scav

    September 1, 2010 at 11:07 am

    @maya: so now I’m wondering about possible marketing possibilities in Cutty Snark . . .

  24. 24.

    Mnemosyne

    September 1, 2010 at 11:10 am

    I may be overly sensitive, but this seems like a form of cannibalism to me.

  25. 25.

    Amir_Khalid

    September 1, 2010 at 11:13 am

    If you drink this stuff, will you live longer?

  26. 26.

    Brachiator

    September 1, 2010 at 11:18 am

    A drink that brings a new meaning to the phrase “tastes like piss” uses sugar from the urine of elderly diabetics.

    And, if you have a shot of this stuff along with a cup of Kopi Luwak coffee (collected from the feces of civets), is this the ultimate in recycling?

  27. 27.

    Rosalita

    September 1, 2010 at 11:21 am

    Good God, not awake enough for THAT and it’s almost lunchtime… fucking HURL!

  28. 28.

    Martin

    September 1, 2010 at 11:29 am

    @Mnemosyne: To paraphrase Sam Bee, it’s no different than having sex with someone who’s wearing a mask with your sister’s face on it.

    Perfectly normal.

  29. 29.

    Shinobi

    September 1, 2010 at 11:39 am

    I may never be able to drink whiskey again. Thanks a lot.

    I’m now going to go gargle coca cola.

  30. 30.

    Amir_Khalid

    September 1, 2010 at 11:41 am

    Former Indian Prime Minister Morarji Desai was known for drinking a cup of his own piss every morning. According to Wikipedia, he took it up in his forties to cure his hemorrhoids, and apparently it worked. BTW, Desai lived to be 99.

    But that’s different, of course, from taking sugar refined from an old diabetic’s wee.

  31. 31.

    WereBear

    September 1, 2010 at 11:45 am

    @Amir_Khalid: I’m skeptical, because if that worked so well, wouldn’t everyone in India be doing it by now?

    I assume the body knows what it wants to get rid of…

    Besides, my great grandmother made it to 101, and I can be certain she did not resort to this.

  32. 32.

    schrodinger's cat

    September 1, 2010 at 11:51 am

    @WereBear: Morarajee Desai was a bit of a crank. About the main post, I only have to say this eeewwwww….

  33. 33.

    joeyess

    September 1, 2010 at 11:52 am

    That’s just fuckin’ wrong.

  34. 34.

    Amir_Khalid

    September 1, 2010 at 12:04 pm

    @WereBear: I assure you, very few people in India shared Desai’s belief in urine therapy then (late 1970s), let alone now. When it was reported at the time, people everywhere thought this practice of his was weird and gross.

  35. 35.

    kommrade reproductive vigor

    September 1, 2010 at 12:10 pm

    And I thought Old Grand-Dad was just the name of a whiskey, not an ingredient.

  36. 36.

    Svensker

    September 1, 2010 at 12:16 pm

    @kommrade reproductive vigor:

    win

  37. 37.

    Xenos

    September 1, 2010 at 12:36 pm

    My old archaeology prof used to drink Laphroaig because he could then boast that his whiskey was filtered through bog people. Tasty stuff, though.

  38. 38.

    Tax Analyst

    September 1, 2010 at 12:38 pm

    Is it served in a urinal-shaped tankard? Is it traditional to order it with one of those public bathroom deodorizer cakes as garnish?

  39. 39.

    Tax Analyst

    September 1, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    And to prove we’re not elitist, our servants eat the same food we do…literally.

  40. 40.

    Alwhite

    September 1, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    @Amir_Khalid:

    There is a newage-ie belief that has floated around for years that there is some magical benefits to drinking your own urine. Since it has been done in survival situations I assume it is not in and of itself deadly but it seems like a bad idea to ingest what your body wants to be rid of.

    I bet if you google it you would get some fan sites.

  41. 41.

    Amir_Khalid

    September 1, 2010 at 12:46 pm

    Finally took a look at the Slashdot story. “Gilpin Family Whisky” is such a boring name for a drink. They should rename it “Old No. 1”.

  42. 42.

    jake the snake

    September 1, 2010 at 12:52 pm

    I’ve heard the Corona is what Dox Equis drinkers piss, but I thought it was snark until now.

  43. 43.

    Cain

    September 1, 2010 at 2:10 pm

    @Amir_Khalid:

    Former Indian Prime Minister Morarji Desai was known for drinking a cup of his own piss every morning. According to Wikipedia, he took it up in his forties to cure his hemorrhoids, and apparently it worked. BTW, Desai lived to be 99.

    That guy was a funny man… his english was horrible too. Of course maybe if he didn’t drink piss, he could have made it to 100.

    cain

  44. 44.

    Cain

    September 1, 2010 at 2:11 pm

    @Amir_Khalid:

    Former Indian Prime Minister Morarji Desai was known for drinking a cup of his own piss every morning. According to Wikipedia, he took it up in his forties to cure his hemorrhoids, and apparently it worked. BTW, Desai lived to be 99.

    On the other hand, a lot of people did believe in gargling cow piss to get rid of canker sores. Or so my parents have told me. It might be a south thing.

    cain

  45. 45.

    Ruckus

    September 1, 2010 at 2:28 pm

    @kommrade reproductive vigor:

    I always thought Old Grand Dad tastes like I expect piss to taste. And no I’m not into comparison drinking.

  46. 46.

    Vlad

    September 1, 2010 at 5:19 pm

    Another notable piss-drinker: former UFC light-heavyweight champ Lyoto Machida.

  47. 47.

    thalarctos

    September 1, 2010 at 5:24 pm

    Well, it’s not without precedent–that is how doctors in antiquity distinguished between diabetes mellitus (“sugar diabetes”) and diabetes insipidus (“tasteless diabetes”).

  48. 48.

    Platonicspoof

    September 1, 2010 at 5:43 pm

    Fetishists out to shock people.

    As this commenter at Slashdot pointed out,
    The only time there is glucose in the urine is when blood glucose levels exceed the ability of the kidneys to resorb the glucose back into the blood . . .

    If there was significantly greater glucose in the urine, then the blood glucose was at damaging levels at least a few hours earlier (ADA Complete Guide to Diabetes).

    Either these diabetics are damaging themselves or it’s geezer abuse or it’s just for the shock value.

Comments are closed.

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