With the news that the new “Trenta”* size Starbucks will offer exceeds the average volume of the human stomach, I (a) gain the opportunity to say I’m not dead yet to this (very spiffy, suddenly) community…
…and more important, have an excuse to post a couple of really juicy bits of art appropriate to the news.
First, for all of you who may wish to revisit what might have been chemically aided visions of your youth, this:
(Next pic after the jump)
*I believe “Trenta” is Seattitalian for “Anti-Personnel Drink.”
And then, I suppose no kinder to anyone with a dread of flashbacks, there’s this:
Bottoms up all.
Images: Hieronymous Bosch, “Gluttony,” from The Seven Deadly Sins and the Four Last Things, c. 1480
Hieronymous Cock engraving after Pieter Breugel the Elder, The Seven Deadly Sins or the Seven Vices – Gluttony, 1558
S. cerevisiae
Woah. Dude. This is like…so freaky…
mr. whipple
Awesome!!!
JPL
@S. cerevisiae: Actually I was going to say it was hilarious. (All meanings of the word intended.)
beltane
Also, Jan Steen’s pair “The Lean Kitchen” and “The Fat Kitchen”.
Radix omnium malorum est cupiditas. Once upon a time greed and gluttony were considered deadly sins, now they are our only real virtues.
djheru
Woah, my senior class photo! How did you get your hands on that?
geg6
Blech. You mean there are people out there that would drink that much of the crappiest coffee on earth? Seriously? I’d rather drink instant than Shitbucks.
NineJean
As one who always orders a “Venti Americano in a Grande Cup” — 5 cents cheaper than a Grande with an extra shot — even that is sometimes too much to drink before it gets too cold. “Anti-Personnel Drink”, I think, is a win for Starbucks — lotsa profit on what you can’t possibly drink.
susteph
i hear ya. besides, trenta is italian for 30. technically, it should be called the trent’uno.
jeffreyw
All of my food pr0n is non-fattening.
RossInDetroit
Coffee is probably the least of their actual costs of doing business. Advertising is far more expensive than roasted beans. Give away more coffee in a giant cup, get free press exposure. No brainer.
asiangrrlMN
Tom, Hieronymus (according to the Googles) Bosch is one of my favorite painters. And, I have never heard of Hieronymus Cock, but that painting is excellent, too. Maybe it’s something with the name Hieronymus. Both these paintings are amazing.
ETA: I love Bosch’s triptychs.
@jeffreyw: And yet, not a single damn link was included in your post.
As for Starbucks–you’re on your own there. But, I am glad your stomach did not explode and spew forth the contents within.
SiubhanDuinne
Great post, Tom, and as always, perfect art choices.
Because it’s an Open Thread (with a “Decline and Fall” subcategory) I’d just like to note that Orange Boner has turned down the White House invitation to the State Dinner for Chinese President Hu, according to the Other Orange (GOS). The comments over there, which I have not checked out for veracity, indicate that this is the third Obama State Dinner that Boner has snubbed. Not to mention the Tucson memorial service last week. His rudeness at this point has gone well beyond giving a finger to the Obamas, and has moved into the realm of dissing important world leaders. It’s not just a breach of protocol, it’s a violation of all kinds of common sense. And this is the man second in line to the Presidency.
:: shakes head sadly ::
Brian S (formerly Incertus)
So I mentioned late in the last open thread that I’d (finally) gotten copies of my book of poems, and someone asked me if I’d post one of them as an example of my work. Well, I don’t want to jam up the comment stream, but here’s a link to one published recently in storySouth, and there’s a link to another on that page.
And if you’d like to buy the book directly from me, here’s how you do it.
RossInDetroit
@SiubhanDuinne:
Protocol, common sense and the GOP in the same paragraph. Crazy talk!
aimai
@SiubhanDuinne:
Yes, but if you read the comment thread at Politico Boehner is pleasing his base. They are all on that old kick “how dare Obama be president when people in this country are having a hard time paying their mortgages!” Plus there are those who see the entire concept of a “State Dinner” as outrageous pandering to China. Interestingly all the pro Boehner/anti Obama commentary over there self identifies as “independent.” But whatever they are calling themselves they are determined that Boehner is doing the right thing by refusing to work with, eat with, socialize with, or have a “photo op” (this seemed to be a huge bone of contention) with Obama.
aimai
asiangrrlMN
@asiangrrlMN: That’s what I get for editing. The last comment is for Tom, obviously.
@Brian S (formerly Incertus): Congratulations! Woot woot. Love the cover.
JPL
@SiubhanDuinne: Josh at TPM gives him a pass on the memorial in Tucson but the state dinner personally causes me to wonder. What are the odds that the repubs are going to use the next election to discuss China’s military build-up. They campaign on fear and bigotry.
Felanius Kootea (formerly Salt and freshly ground black people)
@Brian S (formerly Incertus): Nice!
Zifnab
Damn. Only $.50? I had respect for you Starbucks. I thought for sure this drink was finally going to crest the $10 mark.
Uloborus
@aimai:
You have included one of the most important details of our current political climate that pollsters and the media consistently ignore:
Right now ‘independent’ does not mean ‘swing vote moderate’, it means ‘Republican who doesn’t want to admit it’.
YellowJournalism
Wonder how pleased they’ll be when Boehner requests separate drinking fountains.
Gravenstone
@Uloborus:
FTFY
geg6
Nice to see that at least one person who has used inflammatory rhetoric recently regrets his remarks and has apologized:
http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/01/tucson_shooting_victim_who_threatened_tea_partier.php?ref=fpa
Too bad the only classy person in this whole mess is one who was a victim.
Morbo
Nonsense, coffee is responsible for all of Western Civilization as we know it. And given current events, we need a little more civilization. Civilization… BRB tomorrow morning, damn you, Sid Meier!
aimai
@Uloborus:
Yes, its the new “love that dare not speak its name.”
aimai
Andy K
ZOMG!
When was the last time you saw a mainstream movie in a typical American multiplex, Tom? The medium-size cup holds more than the Trenta’s 31 ounces.
slag
For those of you who are on the verge of getting a cold/flu, I have a suggestion:
Combine 1 tablet (slightly broken up) of Wellness Fizz (aka hippy Airborne) with 1 packet of Emergen-C in a cup of water and swallow it with a Vitamin D3 tablet and lots more water. Daily.
Admittedly OD-ing on Vitamin C and water is hardly a revolutionary illness preventative, but since this is the very first time I’ve ever successfully evaded the flu after being subjected to weeks of it by close friends and co-workers, I thought I’d mention what has worked for me so far. Also, I’ve eaten a lot of oranges. I’m turning Boehner at this very moment.
JPL
@slag: Since this mixture is not purple, I doubt it has medicinal value.
gnomedad
In 1966, the thing being “pushed down our throats” was … black people.
Omnes Omnibus
@JPL:Add food coloring.
Ella in New Mexico
I for one, am ECSTATIC about the Trenta. The only thing that would be better would be if I could by a GALLON of coffee on my way to work at 6am. 13 hour day’s on one’s fee in the ICU are like that.
And hey, ya know what? Fuck all of you and your snooty “Anti-Starbucks” crap. Every year it’s a new corporate enemy–but, God help me it just gets old. I file that fake moral superiority in the same category as “Walmart is Teh Evil” and “Shopping at Target Means You Hate Gay People”. We only got so many stores in my town folks, I can only hold out for so long for a new hairbrush.
I know, it’s so KEEEEWL to roll your eyes and make some cynical pronouncement about their corporate takeover of the local hippie coffee house. But let me state for the record that as an “old crazy-busy people”, I LOVE the fact that I can go to a place to get coffee that is consistently good, has fast, excellent service, and provides my community with jobs that pay above minimum wage and offers health insurance benefits to their employees. The local shops in my town do just fine anyway because they fill a niche for things Starbucks just doesn’t do.
Sorry, just haven’t had enough of my Casi Cielo this morning.
slag
@JPL: Yeah. The color is more of a mauve. So, maybe it’s just the placebo effect that has kept me alive. Either way, I’ll take it.
slag
@Ella in New Mexico:
Really? I was just going to suggest that you may have had too much.
geg6
@Ella in New Mexico:
Well, I certainly don’t think Starbucks is evil. Just the taste of their coffee. I like the baristas in our local one. Especially the one that agrees with me on the evilness of the taste of Starbucks coffee. If I must drink coffee that wasn’t ground and brewed in my own home, I’ll take Dunkin’ Donuts over Starbucks every single time. Hell, Mickey D’s is 100 times better. YMMV.
Tom Levenson
@Ella in New Mexico: Not anti Starbucks, me. I drink their coffee a few times a week, especially Sat. a.m. as I blearily watch my son in martial arts class.
I am anti-gigantism. If that’s elitist, then so am I.
@Andy K: I know. But I regard that as (a) just as bad, and (b) the marketing ploy to make it possible to shove movie theater concession prices down the punters’ throats. Alternative, I’ve seen those buckets of soda used as troughs for whole rows, so it could be seen as mere efficiency.
Yutsano
@Tom Levenson:
I live in the city with the Holy Shrine of All Things Starbucks. I personally love the coffee there (lots of folks don’t like that edge it has, I do) and the baristas are always fun. But no way would I ever order that monstrosity.
RossInDetroit
I spent 10 years in the restaurant business around wine snobs, some of the most insufferable twits on the planet.
Coffee nerdism is getting there fast, people. Turn back while ordinary citizens will still tolerate you.
Cris
“Venti” makes me think of Figaro measuring his wedding bed.
scav
Oh dear: I have in the past gone in and requested their popcorn bucketful of coffee when in a cranky mood (the 20-ozer could last about all day at work). It wasn’t meant to be a suggestion guys. Does this offering come with a towel as they shift to a personal spa business model?
Phyllis
@gnomedad: From the Perlstein column:
I’ve never understood this thinking–if you have your home on the market, it means you want to sell it. Which, to me anyway, logically means you no longer want to live there. So logically, wouldn’t you want to sell it to someone ‘because they had the money’?
Andy K
@Tom Levenson:
As do I, but I don’t see why you needed this “news” as your excuse to post Bosch & Breugel.
An interesting marketing ploy, seeing that every cinema around here has self-serve all you can drink fountains.
Unless these people have been involved in some sort of Mongolian clusterfuck and were already swapping bodily fluids indiscriminately- and for a much better reason than washing down popcorn, imo- that is just disgusting!
Phyllis
And in breaking news on Yahoo’s front page, Venus Williams wore an outfit that appears to be a longish tank top and shorts onto the court to play tennis. What was she thinking?
Bob In Pacifica
I can barely think about it without needing to take a pee.
Tom Levenson
@Andy K:
Not so much an excuse as the prompt to remind me to do so, I guess. ;)
asiangrrlMN
@geg6: Here here. I’m with you on this. I don’t like their coffee. I drink mine at home. If I were to drink at an actual cafe, it would be Caribou Coffee (local chain). It’s not elitist or reverse-elitist or whatever to say Starbucks coffee is not tasty coffee.
Tom Levenson
@Bob In Pacifica: On that theme, this a.m. I retweeted the following bit of webby wit:
scav
@asiangrrlMN: so long as there’s an implicit “to me” at then end of this, sure. My personal absolute nadir of coffee is Grevalia and yet the Swedes love it — all their coffee is like it. I suddenly acquired an absolutist tea habit.
mr. whipple
We drink 8 o’clock as our normal brew. The way we drink coffee, designer blends would put us in the poorhouse.
goatchowder
Hieronymous COCK??? Excuse me? Was that a pun, an intenional misspelling, or something Freudian? Someone feeling a bit phallic today?
Phyllis
@mr. whipple: Same here. Columbian whole bean that I grind every morning.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: I can’t give up Starbucks for two reasons:
1) Shaken passion iced tea lemonade. It’s more of a sickness than a disease.
2) Salted caramel hot chocolate. Heaven in a cup. Pisses me off that it’s seasonal though. And one of those I can only drink one of, but soooo worth it.
Hi hon. About to hit the road here soon but getting in some last-minute blog time.
R-Jud
Nice flashback image choices. I imagine this 50’s housewife on acid would have a hard time with them.
“I wish I could talk to you in Technicolor.”
Nellcote
The new super big size is only for ice drinks. They only hold about 10oz. of coffee anyway. No big deal just more room for ice.
Svensker
@scav:
Srsly? I luuurve me some Gevalia. But, er, maybe it’s the background.
As a native Seattlite and coffee lover I’m of two minds about Starbucks. I used to go the first one way back in the day and the feeling at the time was they were not bad, but not nearly as good as some of the other local joints (especially one place down near the ferry docks where Frank Herbert used to buy his freshly roasted beans). But SBs was pretty good. Then they expanded and when I moved to L.A. and discovered they had NO good coffee there, I was thrilled when SBs arrived and changed the coffee culture in So. Cal. Then I moved to NYC area and the coffee there stank, so was pleased to see SBs come in and improve the coffee culture on the East Coast. But the SBs I’ve visited in NJ and Toronto have the WORST coffee, overroasted and it tastes like dirt, plus they make it too strong — I ask for it watered down and then add cream and it still tastes like crap. Since hub is only allowed to drink paper-filtered coffee (triglycerides) I am having a hard time finding any good coffee outside the house. Tim Horton and McDonalds don’t cut it, and Dunkin’ Donuts is, well, not very good. I haz a coffee sad. But maybe I’ll see if Gevalia delivers to Canada? Will the budget stand it?
SiubhanDuinne
@asiangrrlMN:
Didn’t you ever see the 1969 movie “Can Hieronymous Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?”? Anthony Newley, Joan Collins and Milton Berle, bitchez!
(Edited to get the movie title right.)
eco2geek
So if you cross a disgraced former Senator with a Starbucks coffee drink, do you get a Trenta Latte?
Catsy
@Ella in New Mexico:
You may want to rethink your filing system in favor of one that avoids lazily glossing over nontrivial differences.
At the end of the day, Target and Starbucks rank pretty low on the corporate axis of evil scale. Target is actually a pretty good company to work for overall, and Starbuck isn’t bad unless you’re picky about your coffee or care passionately about the plight of independent baristas. Wal-Mart, on the other hand, is an unqualified malignancy that destroys local economies, abusive and exploitative in its treatment of employees, aggressively and effectively anti-union, and a significant source of funding and lobbying efforts on behalf of destructive right-wing policies.
The equivalency is an absurd one. They’re not even on the same map.
iriedc
Nice open thread kickoff post. I just learned about a site via twitter a couple weeks ago that seems, umm… fitting: http://www.thisiswhyyourefat.com/
b-psycho
I saw an article recently saying Panera Bread has been converting some of their stores to pay-what-you-can non-profit groups. Found that interesting. Then, I came across a thread of Freepers talking about that news…
I swear, those people are so deep into their political stereotypes that it makes me wonder if they practice spouting tired Limbaughisms in the mirror every morning.
MrTemecula
I love coffee. Good coffee. Bad coffee. Expensive coffee. AA coffee. Even Starbuck coffee. As far as I’m concerned, they finally got the size right.
Comrade Mary
Huh. I pick up a Grande tea at Starbucks every now and then, and I’m shocked to see that even that is half the capacity of my stomach. So I guess my New Year’s resolution is not to eat or drink more than two Grande-equivalents at a time.
CalD
What bugs me is that Venti and Trenta are Italian for 20 and 30, which of course is how much the cups hold in fluid ounces, but they don’t have fluid ounces in Italy. So even an Italian person would have no idea what the hell they’re talking about.
Darkrose
@Morbo: I still haven’t unlocked the Coldstone Achievement yet.
Darkrose
@geg6: I think Dunkin Donuts coffee is good if you like your coffee black or with cream and a little sugar. Because I like my coffee as adulturated as possible, and DD’s mocha-type drinks? Gross. They always tasted weirdly chemically to me.
Starbucks’ great achievement has been to convince Americans that French roast coffee is “real” coffee. Even in non-*$ places, French roast is the default now.
divF
I live in Berkeley, and have my coffee every morning at the Peet’s store at the corner of Walnut and Vine where the current high-end coffee craze started. When I’m traveling to cities that don’t have a Peet’s, the Starbuck’s brewed coffee just doesn’t cut it for me, so I order a four-shot espresso and treat it like a regular cup of coffee (i.e. add 1/2 & 1/2). One or two of those and I’m ready to face the day. Ordering the second one of those (if you go to the same store several mornings in a row) does give one a reputation with the baristas, though.
Re: Mozart – We’ll see if Starbucks brings out the 36 and 43 oz. sizes.
Smedley
@Ella in New Mexico: Venta and Tranta is NOT snooty? What happened to small, medium, large and Big Gulp?
The naming is ostentatious and could only appeal to the SNOOTY.
Smedley
@Ella in New Mexico: Venta and Tranta is NOT snooty? What happened to small, medium, large and Big Gulp?
The naming is ostentatious and could only appeal to the [email protected]CalD:
Smedley
@Ella in New Mexico: Venta and Tranta is NOT snooty? What happened to small, medium, large and Big Gulp?
The naming is ostentatious and could only appeal to the [email protected]CalD: @CalD: YES!
Smedley
Sorry about the multi post. The blog server seems to go to sleep and needs poking from time to time.
b-psycho
@divF: I can drink 40 ounces of malt liquor easier than 40, or even 24, ounces of coffee, iced or not.
Gus
@R-Jud: I found that video moving, believe it or not. I’ve had similar experiences under the influence.