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You are here: Home / Smell the santorum

Smell the santorum

by Sarah, Proud and Tall|  December 2, 20118:58 am| 28 Comments

This post is in: Sociopaths

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Over at Kathryn Jean’s House o’ Bug Crazy, the santorum is not only particularly frothy – it has sparkles in it.

My favorite moment on Hannity last night came during an interview with Sarah Palin: “If voters start shifting gears and deciding they want ideological consistency, then they’re going to start paying attention to say, Rick Santorum.”

I put the former senator and governor together in a column this week, as it happens. …

By the way: When Sean pressed her on whether or not she would be endorsing someone in the primaries, when it might matter to someone, she dismissed her influence at this point, calling herself a mere “pundit” whose endorsement wouldn’t amount to “a hill of beans.”

Jesus. Sarah Palin and Rick Santorum meeting at K-Lo’s apartment, to sup her bitter tea and nibble at her cupcakes of regret, is the kind of cosmic dumbness event that flattens small cities and makes the sunsets red for months.

God is not kind enough that he would grant me, before I conga from this vale of tears, the sight of Santorum on the convention stage clasping the hand of his Vice Presidential pick, Two Time Sarah.

A girl can dream.

[Image: The First Foolish Virgin – Martin Schongauer (c1430-1491)]
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Previous Post: « Let the Fellation Begin
Next Post: No surprise: the rubes embrace “The Professor” and his grift… »

Reader Interactions

28Comments

  1. 1.

    Certified Mutant Enemy

    December 2, 2011 at 9:01 am

    Hannity interviewing Palin – could it get any stupider?

  2. 2.

    Hawes

    December 2, 2011 at 9:02 am

    Smell the Santorum?

    Thank you, the retching of my morning coffee and oatmeal back into my mouth has now left me ready for the day.

  3. 3.

    SiubhanDuinne

    December 2, 2011 at 9:02 am

    “Cupcakes of regret.”

    :: giggle ::

  4. 4.

    Comrade Javamanphil

    December 2, 2011 at 9:07 am

    @Certified Mutant Enemy: KLo live blogging it?

  5. 5.

    Alexandra

    December 2, 2011 at 9:09 am

    “Sarah Palin and Rick Santorum meeting at K-Lo’s apartment, to sup her bitter tea and nibble at her cupcakes of regret, is the kind of cosmic dumbness event that flattens small cities and makes the sunsets red for months.”

    Stone-cold classic. Loves me some Sarah Proud and Tall.

  6. 6.

    Mark S.

    December 2, 2011 at 9:10 am

    @Certified Mutant Enemy:

    No, but I think it’s the only show she’ll go on. Sarah finds the hard-hitting question of O’Reilly and Cyborg Lady (I don’t feel like looking up how to spell her name) far too taxing.

  7. 7.

    Tone In DC

    December 2, 2011 at 9:21 am

    Sarah Palin is 100% pure Grift-o-matic. Even Rick the Sanctimonious won’t put up with that.

    SP&T, great as usual.

  8. 8.

    Face

    December 2, 2011 at 9:31 am

    Call me when Palin has her junk enhanced and stars in midnight Cinemax softcore “movie”.

  9. 9.

    Jerzy Russian

    December 2, 2011 at 9:33 am

    @Certified Mutant Enemy:

    Hannity interviewing Palin – could it get any stupider?

    Yes, it can get stupider. Over the years I have given up being amazed at the level of stupid in some people. There must be a vast supply of stupid in the fourth dimension that people like Palin can somehow tap into.

  10. 10.

    arguingwithsignposts

    December 2, 2011 at 9:37 am

    My favorite moment on Hannity last night

    How anyone can type that with a straight face is why we are doomed.

  11. 11.

    Ben Cisco

    December 2, 2011 at 9:43 am

    Sorry to go OT, but schadenfreude strikes again.

  12. 12.

    Ben Cisco

    December 2, 2011 at 9:55 am

    It has sparkles in it.

    Somebody had breakfast at Chappelle’s house.

  13. 13.

    Benjamin Franklin

    December 2, 2011 at 10:25 am

    ” she dismissed her influence at this point, calling herself a mere “pundit” whose endorsement wouldn’t amount to “a hill of beans.””

    Plato once commented on the politicians who visited the slums during their campaign and noted;

    “Your vanity shows forth through every hole in your garment”

    They dressed down for the poor folk for simpatico. The faux humility
    is best expressed by the avaricious crone in question.

  14. 14.

    Snarki, child of Loki

    December 2, 2011 at 10:32 am

    @Jerzy Russian:

    There must be a vast supply of stupid in the fourth dimension that people like Palin can somehow tap into.

    Einstein is rumored to have said that “two things are infinite: the Universe, and Dumbf*. And I’m not sure about the Universe.”

    (*=probably unkennlichkeit or something similar in the original, loosely translated ‘the quantity of Dumb’)

  15. 15.

    Larkspur

    December 2, 2011 at 10:36 am

    I wonder if she pronounced “pundit” as “pundint” again. I just want to tell her, “No, honey, it’s not ‘pundint’, it’s ‘pundon’t‘”.

    I swear, it’s enough to make ya skirm.

  16. 16.

    Hillary Rettig

    December 2, 2011 at 10:48 am

    i wish someone would explain that illustration to me. why is she foolish? and what is she holding? and what’s with her shawl?

  17. 17.

    Shock Trooper in the War on Christmas

    December 2, 2011 at 11:02 am

    @Hillary Rettig:

    Edit: there should be a link in my post; it’s probably momentarily stuck in moderating limbo…

    In any case, the image is based on the biblical parable of the ten virgins (Matt 25:1-13). Taking a look at this passage will clarify the image.

  18. 18.

    Sarah Proud and Tall

    December 2, 2011 at 11:03 am

    @Hillary Rettig:

    1 Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom.
    2 And five of them were wise, and five were foolish.
    3 They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them:
    4 But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.
    5 While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept.
    6 And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.
    7 Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps.
    8 And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your oil; for our lamps are gone out.
    9 But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves.
    10 And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut.
    11 Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us.
    12 But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not.
    Matthew 25:1-12

    Which, frankly, seems a bit rude on his part.

    As for the shawl, I have no idea.

  19. 19.

    ET

    December 2, 2011 at 11:32 am

    If by intimation she was referring to Romney’s lack of “ideological consistency” then she wasn’t exactly wrong.

  20. 20.

    Shock Trooper in the War on Christmas

    December 2, 2011 at 11:52 am

    @Sarah Proud and Tall:

    As for the shawl, I have no idea.

    The shawl may very well signify vanity on behalf of the virgin in question. The foolish virgins are (since they’re foolish and therefore obviously not good God-fearing women) bound to be immodest, vain, and all too eager to lose their virginity.

  21. 21.

    Sarah Proud and Tall

    December 2, 2011 at 11:57 am

    @Shock Trooper in the War on Christmas:

    The foolish virgins are (since they’re foolish and therefore obviously not good God-fearing women) bound to be immodest, vain, and all too eager to lose their virginity.

    Someone’s not getting into Narnia then.

  22. 22.

    Shock Trooper in the War on Christmas

    December 2, 2011 at 12:10 pm

    @Sarah Proud and Tall: Which seems to be the point of the parable…

  23. 23.

    Hillary Rettig

    December 2, 2011 at 1:18 pm

    thanks everyone!

    @shock – beyond vanity, concupiscence, since the shawl outlines her butt.

  24. 24.

    BonnyAnne

    December 2, 2011 at 1:41 pm

    @Hillary Rettig:

    It certainly does, doesn’t it? I thought my eyes were just playing tricks on me but no, that’s her bottom, more or less.

    More, actually. Was this the ideal of the early renaissance woman? Slim, delicate arms, a tiny waistline, dainty neck and no breasts to speak of … but thighs that could crack nuts. Seriously, that woman is FloJo from the hips down.

  25. 25.

    SRW1

    December 2, 2011 at 2:50 pm

    So, Sarah thinks that brokered convention really would do wonders for her market value.

    Grifting to the last dead cat bounce. (Sorry for that violent image on a pet friendly blog.)

  26. 26.

    Arm The Homeless

    December 2, 2011 at 2:58 pm

    Did anyone else notice she is most definitely flipping someone (perhaps God) the Bird? Someone call Ruth Marcus and get me my fainting couch, stat!

  27. 27.

    Cheryl from Maryland

    December 2, 2011 at 3:01 pm

    Oh yes, that is the Northern Renaissance ideal. Go to Google Images and check out the van Eyck brothers, Hans Memling, Albrecht Durer, Lucas Cranach, and Hugo Van der Goes, to name a few.

  28. 28.

    Julia Grey

    December 2, 2011 at 5:52 pm

    to sup her bitter tea and nibble at her cupcakes of regret

    MY EYES!

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