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I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

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Quote tweet friends, screenshot enemies.

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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Open Thread: Brown Bagging It

Open Thread: Brown Bagging It

by $8 blue check mistermix|  March 7, 201410:19 am| 162 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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Paul Ryan is a plagarist and/or liar. But it’s all OK because Obama’s book wasn’t 100% true. Or something. Open thread.

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Reader Interactions

162Comments

  1. 1.

    David Hunt

    March 7, 2014 at 10:22 am

    What? Next you’ll be telling me he didn’t run a 2 hour marathon!

  2. 2.

    I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet

    March 7, 2014 at 10:23 am

    Aasif Mandvi was brilliant on The Daily Show last night – Third World Health Care: Knoxville TN Edition.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  3. 3.

    Poopyman

    March 7, 2014 at 10:23 am

    According to the Raw Story article he’s both, having lifted the story and then lying about where it came from.

  4. 4.

    Linnaeus

    March 7, 2014 at 10:25 am

    I’m not normally one for armchair psychology, but I’m wondering if this guy’s a sociopath.

  5. 5.

    Samuel Knight

    March 7, 2014 at 10:26 am

    Standard playbook, just make up stuff and pander to the nutbase biases.

    Jack Kemp did it, he learned the lesson and is doing the exact same thing.

    Will the other side be willing to just use the word “lie” and call him on it?

    He’s an easy punching bag, highly recommend just laughing at it. Since it’s a pathetic joke treat it as one.

  6. 6.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 10:27 am

    Actually, Ryan’s allowed to lie because the Noah movie isn’t historically accurate.

  7. 7.

    japa21

    March 7, 2014 at 10:28 am

    Actually, it looks like he wasn’t totally a liar. The person who he says told him the story actually testified before his committee on food stamps and did repeat the story. She is actually the plagiarist. However, as the Washington Post points out, if you are giving a major address you better be sure of what you are saying.

    Of courser, it is possible that he actually knew where the story came from and knew not only that it was false but also that it was used as an argument for school lunches and food stamps. But he wouldn’t let an opportunity to feed the belly of the beast that is CPAC pass by.

  8. 8.

    japa21

    March 7, 2014 at 10:31 am

    @japa21: Link to Washington Post article http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/fact-checker/wp/2014/03/06/a-story-too-good-to-check-paul-ryan-and-the-story-of-the-brown-paper-bag/

  9. 9.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 7, 2014 at 10:31 am

    @Belafon: A movie about mythical events isn’t historically accurate? Color me shocked.

  10. 10.

    dubo

    March 7, 2014 at 10:31 am

    According to the WaPo, Ryan’s “source,” Eloise Anderson, actually did tell this story – she’s the plagiarist.

  11. 11.

    dmsilev

    March 7, 2014 at 10:32 am

    It doesn’t matter. He’s still a Serious Policy Person who Cares About The Poor.

    Because reasons.

  12. 12.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    March 7, 2014 at 10:33 am

    This is the politician’s equivalent of those right wing chain emails that go around.

  13. 13.

    Chris

    March 7, 2014 at 10:36 am

    Paul Ryan is a plagarist and/or liar. Republican does bad thing. But it’s all OK because Obama’s book wasn’t 100% true. both sides do it, and Democrats are worse.

    They’re getting as tiresome and predictable as ever.

  14. 14.

    Chris

    March 7, 2014 at 10:39 am

    @japa21:

    Of courser, it is possible that he actually knew where the story came from and knew not only that it was false but also that it was used as an argument for school lunches and food stamps. But he wouldn’t let an opportunity to feed the belly of the beast that is CPAC pass by.

    I remember reading a theory about Birthers that said that for some of them, whether Obama actually faked his birth certificate or not was irrelevant: it was the kind of thing he would do, whether or not he’d actually done it, because he’s a sneaky underhanded lying cheating… you know.

  15. 15.

    MomSense

    March 7, 2014 at 10:39 am

    @I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet:

    WOW! Mandvi was brilliant and that Wall St. Journal guy is an ignoranus. So much stupid and mean in one person.

  16. 16.

    NonyNony

    March 7, 2014 at 10:39 am

    @Linnaeus:

    I’m not normally one for armchair psychology, but I’m wondering if this guy’s a sociopath.

    Let’s see, what’s the definition of a sociopath? The dictionary definition is:

    a person with a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience.

    He may or may not be a sociopath from a clinical perspective, but it certainly appears to my eyes that he’s at least had his conscience surgically removed at some point (if he ever had one).

    Of course, that seems to be a requirement to be a Republican politician these days.

  17. 17.

    geg6

    March 7, 2014 at 10:40 am

    @Linnaeus:

    You’re still wondering about that? I’ve been convinced for years now. IMHO, anyone who reveres that hypocritical psychopath Ayn Rand is either stupid, a psychopath or a sociopath. Or all of the above. What they aren’t are normal people.

  18. 18.

    SRW1

    March 7, 2014 at 10:41 am

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    What you mean? Pat Robertson is interviewing an eyewitness as we speak! And he has documentary footage!

  19. 19.

    MomSense

    March 7, 2014 at 10:45 am

    @geg6:

    IMHO, anyone who reveres that hypocritical psychopath Ayn Rand is either stupid, a psychopath or a sociopath. Or all of the above.

    Or a 12 year old boy who likes the poorly written sexy bits. Hopefully they grow up and leave Rand behind. The ones who don’t become US congresscritters or Wall St. Journal op ed writers.

  20. 20.

    Omnes Omnibus

    March 7, 2014 at 10:46 am

    @SRW1: Pat Robertson is the kind of person who would have bought Jesus’s toenail clippings from a traveling salesman in the Middle Ages

  21. 21.

    RuhRow_Gyro

    March 7, 2014 at 10:47 am

    That is so sweet that she puts his food in a brown bag and now he knows someone really cares.

  22. 22.

    Shakezula

    March 7, 2014 at 10:49 am

    Well let’s see. To begin with, the original story was about a homeless child so his take was already wrong. And he uses this story to claim that it is better for kids not to eat at all, if their parents can’t show their love by making enough money to pay for lunch (while he works to make sure said parents can’t earn a living wage).

    I put all my chips on #3 – Crazy assed liar.

  23. 23.

    cleek

    March 7, 2014 at 10:49 am

    you can’t hide your Ryan eyes…

  24. 24.

    kindness

    March 7, 2014 at 10:52 am

    Integrity is not one of Paul Ryan’s virtues. That the MSM doesn’t go head on Jon Stewart with anything that comes out of Ryan’s mouth just goes to show that the MSM is complicit in the scam most the time.

  25. 25.

    Cassidy

    March 7, 2014 at 10:52 am

    I think we can agree on “all around pile of shit”.

  26. 26.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 7, 2014 at 10:52 am

    Republicans have to plagiarize or synthesize their anecdotes about the poor because none of them have actually spoken with a poor person since the Great Depression.

  27. 27.

    Linnaeus

    March 7, 2014 at 10:53 am

    @NonyNony: @geg6:

    I’m just often reluctant to throw around terms like “sociopath” too loosely. Maybe he’s not one, at least not clinically as NonyNony suggests. Socially, though, his policy prescriptions are functionally sociopathic.

  28. 28.

    burnspbesq

    March 7, 2014 at 10:53 am

    There is a new record out this week on Deutsche Grammophon of the Copenhagen Philharmonic playing new orchestral works by Bryce Dessner (of The National) and an orchestral suite derived from the soundtrack of the film “There Will Be Blood,” composed by Jonny Greenwood (of Radiohead).

    If you care at all about the current state of “classical music,” this is a must-hear. These guys may make their money on rock, but they are both major talents as composers.

  29. 29.

    danielx

    March 7, 2014 at 10:54 am

    But it’s all good because it totally proves that Paul Ryan reads books.

    And that proves that he is a Very Serious Person.

  30. 30.

    BubbaDave

    March 7, 2014 at 10:55 am

    I guess we should cancel our liberal plans to have hordes of roaming “urban” youth (IYKWIMAITYD) knock down school kids and steal their brown bag lunches to force them into a life of cafeteria dependency. Curse you, Paul Ryan, for discovering our evil plot and having the courage to boldly reveal the truth!

  31. 31.

    Highway Rob

    March 7, 2014 at 10:56 am

    (1) Conservative tells false story.

    (2) Non-crazy-person demonstrates that the story is false.

    (3) “So what if this story is false, what matters is that it could be true.”

    Repeat as necessary.

  32. 32.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 10:59 am

    I propose a brown-bag tax credit. Keep your receipts as you buy your kids’ lunches, all those brown bags you buy may save you money on next year’s tax returns.

  33. 33.

    Frankensteinbeck

    March 7, 2014 at 11:01 am

    @kindness:
    As a class – and they are a social group, mixing primarily with each other – national journalists seem to be Reagan Democrats. They know that they’re basically liberal but the country is basically conservative and that really the way you help poor people is by gutting the safety net so they’ll learn character, and that Obama guy, he just doesn’t seem relatable, and how can we be safe from the Evil Empire without a cowboy to stare the bad guys down? Oh, and since most of them are rich, it’s clear to them that rich people are just better than poor people and should get preferential treatment and constant praise.

  34. 34.

    MattF

    March 7, 2014 at 11:02 am

    @Just Some Fuckhead: I think there’s a lot of truth to this. Ryan has a whole spectrum of behaviors that draw from the winger-universe. It’s his repertoire. And the whole set of responses that start out with “Well, y’know, none of this is actually true” is just irrelevant.

  35. 35.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 11:02 am

    Next, Ryan will propose a program where homeless schoolkids will get their lunches in an Ayn Rand lunch box. But, instead of actual food inside it will contain selected passages from her many, many, fine books.
    I loved my Hopalong Cassidy lunch box with its thermos full of Topper pee.

  36. 36.

    Chyron HR

    March 7, 2014 at 11:03 am

    I recommend the Republicans re-re-rebrand themselves as the “brown baggers” and wear lunch bags over their heads. It could only help their electoral chances.

  37. 37.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 11:06 am

    @dmsilev: He’s also a budget hawk fiscal conservative who voted to put two wars on the national credit card and wants us to get Serious about Entitlements. Also, too, his history as a marathon runner, the story of his hard luck childhood, having an after school job, the Janesville Ford plant. The man has a long history as a careful half-truther.

    He’s still just the sort of young man Bob Schieffer and Cokie Roberts wish their daughters could bring home.

  38. 38.

    feebog

    March 7, 2014 at 11:06 am

    I’ll take liar for $200 Alex.

  39. 39.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 11:07 am

    @Chyron HR: Would be better if they wore plastic dry cleaner bags over their entire heads.

  40. 40.

    Petorado

    March 7, 2014 at 11:12 am

    This is silly to bring this up, but contrary to Ryan’s fairy tale, kids in the lunchroom would more likely say that the kids with the Lunchables in the brown paper bag has the parents that don’t care, while the kid who has the cash to get a burger and fries from the cafeteria has the parents who do. So that’s my contrary annecdata to Ryan’s version.

  41. 41.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    March 7, 2014 at 11:13 am

    @MattF: When you tell them it isn’t true – and I do with relatives and Facebook friends – they reply that this or that tangential claim may be questionable but it illustrates a larger truth they believe in.

  42. 42.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:13 am

    @MomSense:

    “Stupid and mean” is a job requirement at the WSJ.

  43. 43.

    Violet

    March 7, 2014 at 11:13 am

    @David Hunt:

    What? Next you’ll be telling me he didn’t run a 2 hour marathon!

    Don’t forget all those fourteeners in Colorado that he climbed.

  44. 44.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:14 am

    @Petorado:

    Actually, yes.

    When I was growing up, it was definitely not cool to be a brown bagger. Even if you were brown bagging with a Beatles lunchbox. What was cool was eating whatever the lunch lady was serving up.

  45. 45.

    GregB

    March 7, 2014 at 11:14 am

    Paul Ryan and the GOP have inspired me to go and slap the trays of food out of the hands of these freeloading young urchins.

    They should be force to mop the floors wearing Gingrich 2016 t-shirts if they want any of my tax dollar supported food handouts.

  46. 46.

    Ruckus

    March 7, 2014 at 11:15 am

    @Linnaeus:
    Wonder no more.

  47. 47.

    maximiliano furtive, formerly known as dr. bloor

    March 7, 2014 at 11:17 am

    @Linnaeus:

    I’m not normally one for armchair psychology, but I’m wondering if this guy’s a sociopath.

    I favor a Shaker rocker rather than an armchair, but the answer is “yes.”

  48. 48.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 11:18 am

    @I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet: That WSJ douchebag did sum up the Paul Ryan-GOP stance on poverty: Stop being poor. Health care: Don’t get sick.

    The sad part is that segment could have been run at any point in the last five years.

  49. 49.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 11:18 am

    @Violet: Any time I read that I think of William H. Macy’s character in Jurassic Park III, though I tend to hope the spinosaurus catches him.

  50. 50.

    Amir Khalid

    March 7, 2014 at 11:19 am

    Maybe someone familiar with the New Testament can help me. How does this one end?

    “Blessed are those packing heat, for …”

  51. 51.

    SiubhanDuinne

    March 7, 2014 at 11:19 am

    @burnspbesq:

    Ordered from Arkivmusic. Thanks!

  52. 52.

    Yatsuno

    March 7, 2014 at 11:20 am

    @Villago Delenda Est: Of course they can turn that into poor shaming by making the reduced or free lunch ticket colours different. Which they do.

  53. 53.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:20 am

    @MomSense:

    Aha!

    and that Wall St. Journal guy is an ignoranus.

    I see what you did there! It took me a second reading, but, by golly, I see it now!

  54. 54.

    MattF

    March 7, 2014 at 11:21 am

    @GregB: Noot would be cool with that, as long as they don’t try to form a labor union.

  55. 55.

    jibeaux

    March 7, 2014 at 11:21 am

    Of course he’s a sociopath. These days, conservatism isn’t a political philosophy, it’s an entry in the DSM-IV.

  56. 56.

    geg6

    March 7, 2014 at 11:25 am

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Totally agree. It was the most embarrassing thing in the world to bring lunch to school. You ate the cafeteria food or were considered weird forever more. At least until high school, where it was cool to skip the cafeteria and go off campus to the local Burger King and Arby’s.

    I don’t think the kids in my old high school are allowed to leave campus for lunch anymore. It could be because my generation often never came back from lunch. We were too stoned to make it back.

  57. 57.

    Violet

    March 7, 2014 at 11:26 am

    @Belafon: I have never seen Jurassic Park III. There was a third one? What happened to that character?

  58. 58.

    MattF

    March 7, 2014 at 11:26 am

    @Amir Khalid: “…for they will mow down the lilies of the field and give ’em what they really deserve.”

  59. 59.

    Violet

    March 7, 2014 at 11:32 am

    @geg6: This was how it was in my schools too, although we did have a “bring your own lunch day” from time to time and everyone had lunchboxes. I brought my lunch in high school because, as you said, it wasn’t cool to eat in the cafeteria. Although they did put in a salad bar and then it became cool for the cheerleaders and other popular girls to eat a teensy salad at lunch.

  60. 60.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:32 am

    @Violet:

    Well, one of them gets eaten by a dinosaur.

    Well, not one of the principles, of course, but one of the bit players.

    No speaking part extras are of course known as “hors d’oeuvres”

  61. 61.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 11:32 am

    Two days after a poll shows that John McCain is the least respected Senator in the country, after a week of everyone who knows anything about the region saying that everything he says about Russia/Ukraine is remarkably and dangerously ignorant, when a cursory review of the last ten years confirms that ignorance and underscores his hypocrisy, Time Magazine is touting a “Newsmaker Interview” with the man Andrew Sullivan is now calling “the buffoon from Arizona”. I guess he needed a dry run for his lines for this two or three Sunday Show exclusives this week.

  62. 62.

    D58826

    March 7, 2014 at 11:33 am

    Given all the love he is getting at CPAC and from the GOP, will Putin be invited to speak? Or maybe he will be in the 2016 presidential front runner. He certainly looks better shirtless than Christie!

  63. 63.

    MattF

    March 7, 2014 at 11:34 am

    @D58826: Ew.

  64. 64.

    Violet

    March 7, 2014 at 11:37 am

    @D58826: Speaking of Christie, I saw a few minutes of the Today Show this morning and they showed a clip of Christie at CPAC. He said something like, “If we’re going to be the party of pro-life, we need to care for the babies both in the womb and after they leave the womb.” Interesting… Was in another room so didn’t catch if they showed how well that was received by the audience. Anyone know?

  65. 65.

    chopper

    March 7, 2014 at 11:38 am

    the problem in these guys’ minds isn’t as much that kids are getting free lunches, it’s that the kids’ parents don’t feel sufficiently guilty about their kids getting free lunches. they are supposed to feel horrible, like leeches ruining things for everyone else. you know, like worthless assholes who should just up and die and ‘reduce the surplus population’.

    truth is, somewhere there’s a parent of a kid getting a free lunch who doesn’t get down on their knees every morning and beg forgiveness from paul ryan for being a ‘taker’. and that gives paul ryan a sad.

  66. 66.

    Mararama

    March 7, 2014 at 11:38 am

    @Villago Delenda Est: When I grew up, bringing lunch from home wasn’t any particular stigma, but I envied all the girls with the pretty lunch boxes. Only brown bags for our family of six! And mom wasn’t any too fancy about what she packed. Mom allowed us one “hot lunch” per week. We studied the menu like detectives to pick the best stuff, which back in the sixties was usually a hamburger and jello with a little dollop of whipped cream. Bringing lunch in a brown bag was no badge of honor, that’s for sure.

  67. 67.

    Yatsuno

    March 7, 2014 at 11:38 am

    @D58826: Didn’t Bibi speak at CPAC one year? Also: am I crazy or does CPAC seem kinda boring this year?

  68. 68.

    Yatsuno

    March 7, 2014 at 11:38 am

    @D58826: Didn’t Bibi speak at CPAC one year? Also: am I crazy or does CPAC seem kinda boring this year?

  69. 69.

    Someguy

    March 7, 2014 at 11:38 am

    No comments on the Senate Rapeublicans shooting down Gillibrand’s bill to force the military to take sexual assault at least as serious as budget cut threats or annual service academy football games? Huh.

  70. 70.

    BGK

    March 7, 2014 at 11:39 am

    So yesterday there was a serious (seriously!) discussion here on requiring gun owners to have liability insurance. This happened in Florida, making my brane hurt: Florida House Moves Ahead On Insurance Gun Bill.

    The shorter: House and Senate committees passed bills barring “discrimination” against gun owners by homeowners insurance carriers by prohibiting the carriers from dropping coverage or changing different premiums of gun owners.

    So I guess the insurers will get to eat the liability suits, and like it.

    So, my coverage can by dropped, or refused, based on the kind of dog I own, but not on my personal arsenal.

  71. 71.

    chopper

    March 7, 2014 at 11:40 am

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    totally. i brought a bag lunch every day because i was too broke to buy a hot lunch like all my $2-having friends.

  72. 72.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 11:42 am

    @Violet: It was a pretty good version, as a trilogy goes, they were all pretty good.

    The premise of this one is that the son of this couple, the Kirbys (played by Macy and Tea Leoni) is trapped on the island from the second movie. They hire the paleontologist from the first movie, Grant (played again by Sam Neill), to help them search the island for their son, though they don’t tell him this at the beginning. Instead, they say that Kirby is a wealthy businessman whose been hiking everywhere and they just want a flyover and Grant to tell them about the wildlife. In one of the scenes, Kirby is trying to put his backpack on, and is spinning around in circles trying to get to the second backpack strap, making it pretty obvious that he’s not very experienced. Ultimately they find the son and the son, parents, Grant, and Grants intern make it off the island, after being chased by a spinosaurus and velociraptors.

  73. 73.

    chopper

    March 7, 2014 at 11:43 am

    @BGK:

    so i guess the insurance companies will have to raise everybody’s rates, for which floridians will blame obama.

  74. 74.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 11:43 am

    @Someguy: When you’re trying to persuade people of something, passive aggressive self-righteous condescension is always the best place to start. You are a very smart person.

  75. 75.

    Violet

    March 7, 2014 at 11:45 am

    @Belafon: Oh, okay! Now I see the comparison.

  76. 76.

    JPL

    March 7, 2014 at 11:45 am

    Glenn Kessler gave Paul four pinocchios and gave Wonkette some credit. I still think that Obama shares the blame for calling Ryan a serious thinker though.

  77. 77.

    maximiliano furtive, formerly known as dr. bloor

    March 7, 2014 at 11:48 am

    @jibeaux: Ryan’s a particularly interesting creature, though. He’s an instrumental liar, as all politicians are, and he’s an ambitious, which all politicians are, and he’s got a narcissistic streak, which all politicans do.

    But he lies gratuitously. He lies about anything and everything, for no good reason and in many cases when he’s clearly going to get caught. And getting caught has no discernible impact on him–not as in changing his views, which never happens, but he can’t even be bothered to pretend that he thinks getting caught means or says anything.

  78. 78.

    beltane

    March 7, 2014 at 11:48 am

    @BGK: Being that insurance companies are businesses and not charities, the only logical response to this law will be for insurers to assume that ALL Florida homeowners own guns and are careless with them. The forced subsidization of Florida gun owners is soc!alism, but it’s drenched in blood so it’s OK, not like birth control coverage.

  79. 79.

    gvg

    March 7, 2014 at 11:48 am

    One of the comets on that WSJ article had a good point. Besides being liars, both Ryan and Anderson are talking nonsense. What do they even MEAN by the left is only offering “a full stomach and an empty soul.” How does he come to the conclusion that the brown bag story mean SNAP programs should be cut? I got that the child in question had a mother that essentially abandoned him and wanted food AND a substitute mother in the nice lady who was taking an interest in him. There aren’t enough nice ladys who can do that though there are some. Programs like snap help more numbers even though they aren’t personal love.
    Has Ryan ever gotten to know one homeless kid and helped him? All I ever hear about is him trying to hurt the poor.

  80. 80.

    scav

    March 7, 2014 at 11:49 am

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    speaking part extras are of course known as “hors d’oeuvres”

    If the producer really loved those dinosaurs or monsters, he’d have costume hand-wrap the extras in paper bags.

    Red paper bags, it goes without saying.

  81. 81.

    cleek

    March 7, 2014 at 11:50 am

    @Someguy:
    it’s too depressing to think about

  82. 82.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:50 am

    @Someguy:

    I haven’t looked at THOMAS, but I read that 10 Rethugs voted for it, and 10 Dems voted against it, so there was some bi-partisan douchbaggery involved in this.

    There are some people out there who are loathe to “interfere” with the military justice system, even when it’s painfully obvious it needs some interference.

  83. 83.

    Amir Khalid

    March 7, 2014 at 11:52 am

    @JPL:
    I suspect Obama was misquoted, i.e. that he actually called Paul Ryan a “serious stinker”.

  84. 84.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 7, 2014 at 11:52 am

    @gvg:

    Has Ryan ever gotten to know one homeless kid and helped him?

    Ryan so loves the poor that he intends to starve them straight into heaven.

  85. 85.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:53 am

    @maximiliano furtive, formerly known as dr. bloor:

    What is even worse is that a majority of his constituents have absolutely no problem with his behavior, either.

  86. 86.

    piratedan

    March 7, 2014 at 11:53 am

    @JPL: well he’s what passes as a serious thinker on that side of the aisle simply because of lack of spittle and vitriol, which when you think about is a pretty low bar that regrettably few GOP congress critters can clear

  87. 87.

    scav

    March 7, 2014 at 11:54 am

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate: It’s God’s plan. Pop em out early and often, then Pop em off before they have the opportunity to sin or worse, inconvenience their betters.

  88. 88.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 11:56 am

    @gvg: Ryan hasn’t come to any conclusion from the story that SNAP should be cut. He wants SNAP to be cut because he doesn’t want to pay for other people and thinks that this story will convince people to allow it.

  89. 89.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 11:59 am

    @Violet:

    Of course, by caring for babies outside the womb he means darling white babies, not those brown and blah ones that will grow up to wear hoodies and terrorize entire neighborhoods with skittles and “thug music” played really loud.

  90. 90.

    Someguy

    March 7, 2014 at 12:01 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist

    If condescension and snark causes you butthurt, I suspect you have difficulty reading BJ while sitting down.

  91. 91.

    Yatsuno

    March 7, 2014 at 12:02 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: At least he’s not a hippie. Or one of them Dumbocrats. Tribalism über alles, mein Freund.

  92. 92.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:02 pm

    @Belafon: Well, I think it’s time for veterans to take a stand on this.

    Male, didn’t serve, supported the war of your generation but had “other priorities”? No freedom for you, jackass.

    So sorry, Dark Lord (Vietnam) and Paul Ryan (Desert Storm). You’re fucked.

  93. 93.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate:

    Ryan so loves the poor that he intends to starve them straight into heaven.

    Suffer the little children.

  94. 94.

    Cassidy

    March 7, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: Paul Ryan is young enough to have volunteered for OIF/ OEF.

  95. 95.

    different-church-lady

    March 7, 2014 at 12:06 pm

    @maximiliano furtive, formerly known as dr. bloor: It’s Harry Franfurt’s well-worn distinction between lying and bullshitting:

    Frankfurt argues that bullshit either can be true or can be false; hence, the bullshitter is a man or a woman whose principal aim — when uttering or publishing bullshit — is to impress the listener and the reader with words that communicate an impression favorable to the speaker, with no concern for the truth of what they’re saying. Likewise, the bullshitter is not concerned with consistency between what they’re saying at the moment, and anything they’ve previously said. Consequently, “the bullshitter is faking things, but that does not necessarily mean he gets them wrong.”.[1] He simply doesn’t care. In contrast, the liar must know the truth, of the matter under discussion, in order to better conceal it from the listener or the reader being deceived with a lie; while the bullshitter’s sole concern is personal advancement and advantage to his or her agenda; bullshit thus is a greater enemy of the truth than are lies.[2]

  96. 96.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 7, 2014 at 12:07 pm

    @scav:

    Pop em out early and often, then Pop em off before they have the opportunity to sin or worse, inconvenience their betters.

    Darn tootin’! Some of them are still managing to get into college and you know what happens then. By starving them to death while they’re children we’re saving some Real American the cost of the ammunition he’d expend in standing his ground later.

  97. 97.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 12:07 pm

    @Someguy: aw, Puddinhead, you overestimate your effectiveness. You’re a bloggy mosquito.

  98. 98.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:07 pm

    @Cassidy:

    That too. You and I have paid for our freedom. The Dark Lord, the Marquis de Mittens and his vile spawn, and Paul Ryan? Not so much.

    They’re fucked, and they fucked themselves.

  99. 99.

    Kay

    March 7, 2014 at 12:09 pm

    @Violet:

    “When we say that we’re pro-life and that we’re proudly pro-life, that doesn’t mean that we’re pro-life just when that human being is in the womb,” Christie said. “We need to be pro-life when they leave the womb as well, for every step of their lives.”

    I really find the phrasing offensive, and they use this language and this frame all the time. The woman is not separate from “the womb”. If she were abortion laws wouldn’t be so difficult and we wouldn’t have been struggling over this for 150 years.

    They are completely removing the woman from the pregnancy. She disappears. You see it even in their statutes, their state laws.

    That they don’t realize this, that it doesn’t occur to them, to me means they cannot be trusted to write laws that apply to pregnant women. Fuck him. If he could write that paragraph and deliver it without realizing she’s missing, he has no business talking to me or anyone else about this. They’re not even willing to seriously grapple with it, think it through, weight the interests. She’s not even worth that.

  100. 100.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 12:10 pm

    @Amir Khalid: “Blessed are those packing heat, for they shall be treated politely.” Glock. 9.30

  101. 101.

    schrodinger's cat

    March 7, 2014 at 12:11 pm

    I have a contender for the False Equivalence Award, Nick Kristof.

  102. 102.

    patrick II

    March 7, 2014 at 12:12 pm

    I don’t really care if Ryan is lying or not. Stopping lunch programs for millions of kids because one kid wants his lunch in a brown paper bag is preposterous on its face. The sociopathology is worse than the lie.

  103. 103.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:12 pm

    @maya: A well armed society is a polite society.

    Eventually, because there can be only one.

  104. 104.

    Shakezula

    March 7, 2014 at 12:13 pm

    @BGK: Let the gun manufacturer vs. insurance company bidding war begin!

    If gun makers come out on top change your dog’s name to Glock or Bullet or something like that.

  105. 105.

    Cassidy

    March 7, 2014 at 12:14 pm

    @Kay: They realize it. You all are nothing to them. It’s done on purpose.

  106. 106.

    Elizabelle

    March 7, 2014 at 12:14 pm

    @cleek:

    you can’t hide your Ryan eyes…

    THAT needs to be a revolving tagline.

    Some of the others are getting to be too inside baseball, although I still laugh at the vicious jackals one. Whatever.

  107. 107.

    different-church-lady

    March 7, 2014 at 12:14 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: And at the rate they accidentally shoot themselves, eventually zero.

  108. 108.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 12:15 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: Ugh, I saw that last night and was so disgusted that he felt the need to start with Very Reasonable disclaimer that I didn’t even notice that half-wittery about arming the Syrians. What an asshole.

  109. 109.

    JustRuss

    March 7, 2014 at 12:16 pm

    @gvg: Indeed. Sure, it would be great if every kid had a mother who lovingly packed his lunch every morning, but cutting SNAP does nothing to make that happen. But doing nothing is cheap–in the short run at least–and fits in nicely with the conservative strategy of “If we ignore it, we can pretend it doesn’t exist”. See also warming, global.

  110. 110.

    Yatsuno

    March 7, 2014 at 12:16 pm

    @maya: “Their authoritah shall be respected, and they shall be numbered among the elect. And they shall strike down with a fierce vengeance all those of dark countenance who dare cross them.”

  111. 111.

    RaflW

    March 7, 2014 at 12:16 pm

    “He wanted one, he said, because he knew a kid with a brown paper bag had someone who cared for him,” Ryan said. “This is what the left does not understand.”

    Fuck you with a red hot poker, Mister. How dare you pretend that its the left that doesn’t understand compassion. You would starve your own mother if it was “good for her soul.”

    You fucking moral black hole.

  112. 112.

    Kay

    March 7, 2014 at 12:17 pm

    @Violet:

    Not that he asked, but I actually find the mewling sanctimony and smarmy pity more offensive that a straight-up Right winger that shrieks about baby killers. At least those Right wingers are granting women some agency, an existence apart from “the womb”.

    The people who scare me are the Christie’s, where she simply disappears.

  113. 113.

    Suffern ACE

    March 7, 2014 at 12:17 pm

    I know it’s really just an attempt to drive them off the air, but I do find it amusing that the Canadian pron channels are going to need to start finding Canadian porn in order to meet their license renewals and offer closed captioning. I wonder if being an Enlgish to French porn translator pays well. We’ve got to make certain everyone understands what they’re watching.

  114. 114.

    JoyfulA

    March 7, 2014 at 12:18 pm

    @Belafon: You don’t get groceries in little brown paper bags anymore. You have to buy a package of brown paper bags, which is not an item covered by food stamps. So that adds another expense for poor families, and you have to be at least “lower-middle” class to afford a package of brown paper bags.

    So maybe they could update their story to “brown plastic bags”?

  115. 115.

    karen

    March 7, 2014 at 12:18 pm

    But it’s all OK because Obama ’s book wasn’t 100% true. Or something is black/a thug/pick one.

    FTFY

  116. 116.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 7, 2014 at 12:19 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    You and I have paid for our freedom.

    As did I. If my fury wasn’t exhausted I would be furious with Ryan and all of the other stay-at-homes who still imply that they’re better Americans than I am simply because I believe that all of my fellows here deserve whatever it takes from the rest of us to have a roof over their heads, full stomachs, medical care, and an education.

    ETA: Having served does not in any way make me a better citizen than anyone else.

  117. 117.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 12:21 pm

    For heaven’s sakes, they are not sociopaths. They regard themselves as socioyellowbrickroaders. Their way leads to the Wizard (Jesus Christ) who teaches all that true enlightenment, courage, intelligence and power comes from within. And, from the natural order of a free munchkin marketplace.

  118. 118.

    Elizabelle

    March 7, 2014 at 12:22 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    That church should not have its tax exemption.

    Ridiculous. And what a wolf in sheeple clothing is that pastor. Wanker.

  119. 119.

    different-church-lady

    March 7, 2014 at 12:22 pm

    @Suffern ACE:

    the Canadian pron channels are going to need to… …offer closed captioning.

    Heh.

  120. 120.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:23 pm

    @Suffern ACE: This is because long, windy exposition is absolutely vital to every pr0n clip ever presented on the interwebs, because it’s simply impossible to understand the plot or WTF is going on without extensive backstory and explanation.

    Of course, you can tell if it’s Canadian pr0n if one of the participants is wearing a toque. An occasional “eh” is helpful as well.

  121. 121.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    March 7, 2014 at 12:25 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    This is because long, windy exposition is absolutely vital to every pr0n clip ever presented on the interwebs…

    Oh shit, there’s another thing I’ve been doing wrong. I always just wait for the crappy saxophone music.

  122. 122.

    piratedan

    March 7, 2014 at 12:26 pm

    @different-church-lady: it’s not authentic Canadian Porn unless it has hotdish or Labatt’s involved…..

  123. 123.

    JoyfulA

    March 7, 2014 at 12:26 pm

    @gvg: Ryan washed the clean dishes at a soup kitchen when he was on the campaign trail. Surely that should count for something!

  124. 124.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 12:27 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: “Of course, you can tell if it’s Canadian pr0n if one of the participants is wearing a toque. An occasional “eh” is helpful as well. ”

    They also call a condom “aboot”.

  125. 125.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:27 pm

    @Higgs Boson’s Mate:

    ETA: Having served does not in any way make me a better citizen than anyone else.

    Oh, I think it does make you better than Paul Ryan, particularly because you actually state that and thus deny Ryan’s unstated, but implied, point.

    Ryan has no basis to make such a claim, ever. You and I might do so, but we won’t because we learned a bit of humility in the process.

  126. 126.

    catclub

    March 7, 2014 at 12:28 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: “There are some people out there who are loathe to “interfere” with the military justice system, even when it’s painfully obvious it needs some interference. ”

    So we have this system that has clearly not worked. The last thing we should allow is to try some change in that system.

    Also, it was McCaskill versus Gillibrand, as far as NPR was concerned.

  127. 127.

    schrodinger's cat

    March 7, 2014 at 12:28 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: He doesn’t seem that bright.

  128. 128.

    RaflW

    March 7, 2014 at 12:29 pm

    @Frankensteinbeck:

    …that Obama guy, he just doesn’t seem relatable…

    Most of the time, this is the core of it I think. Most of the access-obsessed media hate the cool detachment and the careful analysis. He’s the “A” student they hated all through middle and high school.

    What a bunch of vain, useless turds we have in the press.

  129. 129.

    catclub

    March 7, 2014 at 12:30 pm

    @BGK: Free market as long as you do what you are told.

  130. 130.

    Hungry Joe

    March 7, 2014 at 12:33 pm

    Ryan seems to be a pathological liar, i.e., someone who’ll lie for no good reason. A wonderful passage in Manil Sura’s novel “The Death of Vishnu” (I think that’s where I read it, anyway) describes a civil servant who was such a pathological liar that he’d go to the roof of the building to eat alone because he’d lie about what he brought for lunch.

  131. 131.

    Hal

    March 7, 2014 at 12:35 pm

    I love that the moral of the story is that these kids are better off starving then getting a free lunch. Builds character.

  132. 132.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:35 pm

    @Hungry Joe: Jon Lovitz did Paul Ryan back in the 80’s.

    “My wife…Morgan Fairchild! Yeah, that’s the ticket!”

  133. 133.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 7, 2014 at 12:37 pm

    @maya:

    No aboot, no booty. Wait, that’s a terrible rhyme…

  134. 134.

    RaflW

    March 7, 2014 at 12:37 pm

    @maximiliano furtive, formerly known as dr. bloor:

    getting caught has no discernible impact on him–not as in changing his views, which never happens, but he can’t even be bothered to pretend that he thinks getting caught means or says anything.

    Well, when the sole punishment is four pinocchios (how sissy is that!?), why shouldn’t he lie like a banshee? Will it mean he won’t get on the Sunday shows? Won’t get plenty of ink from the Murdoch empire? No, of course not.

    There is no disincentive to lie, whatsoever, if you are Republican.

    (Sorry, Glenn Kessler, none of your peers cares, not one iota).

  135. 135.

    Belafon

    March 7, 2014 at 12:47 pm

    @JoyfulA: What would be the point of a tax credit if the poor could earn it?

  136. 136.

    Frankensteinbeck

    March 7, 2014 at 12:55 pm

    @RaflW:
    ‘He just isn’t relatable’ is also how mild racism works psychologically. You never get to see how your feelings are constructed, only try to guess at them. The vast majority of the national journalist class are in high risk groups for non-frothing ‘those poor black people in their ghettos’ racism, which was a dominant theme during the time of their beloved Reagan. Those people would never put together the sentence ‘blacks are inferior’, but they will never have as good an opinion of a black male as they will of anyone else. Since they’re sure they can’t be racists, but Obama being in charge makes them uncomfortable, it must be his fault somehow.

    I will grant you that they are ALSO the kind of people who feel resentful when an actual intellect reveals them to be mindless gossips and bullshitters.

  137. 137.

    Bobby Thomson

    March 7, 2014 at 12:56 pm

    @JPL:

    Glenn Kessler gave Paul four pinocchios and gave Wonkette some credit.

    Which is more than TPM did. They gave Kessler 100% of the credit. For people who whine all the time about dead tree media not giving them credit, they’re doing a piss poor job of it themselves.

  138. 138.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    March 7, 2014 at 12:57 pm

    @RaflW: (Sorry, Glenn Kessler, none of your peers cares, not one iota).

    They care as much as Kessler does, which is about as much as a sports reporter cares who writes “that was a bungled pass interference call…” about a game they’re only marginally interested in. The whole infantile language (“pinnochios”, “pants on fire”) they use for “fact checking” (the idea that “fact checking” is a subset political journalism drives me crazy) just underscores how the superficial way they view politics. Truth is as important as the lighting in a campaign commercial or the candidates wardrobe.

  139. 139.

    JPL

    March 7, 2014 at 12:58 pm

    @JoyfulA: Paul Ryan was running for V.P. and had to be careful not to mess up his manicure. also, cooties.

  140. 140.

    schrodinger's cat

    March 7, 2014 at 1:02 pm

    @Frankensteinbeck: I think the national media cannot accept the fact that a black is smarter than they are and who does not fall for their BS, like most Democratic office holders do. It bothers them, that he won’t play their game.

  141. 141.

    Bubblegum Tate

    March 7, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    Also on the “literary” tip, Greg Gutfield, the guy Fox News hired to be all “cool” and “conservative Daily Show-ish, has a new whining tome out called Not Cool: The Hipster Elite and Their War on You. It’s about how too-cool-for-school liberals are evil and uncool conservatives are both their victims and their superiors.

    Thesis statement: “This bigotry toward the bland is neither harmless nor slight, but results in actual suffering, and even death.”

    Go ahead and skim through the Look Inside on Amazon. It’s…something.

  142. 142.

    maya

    March 7, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    There’s something about Ryan that seems so familiar.

  143. 143.

    Frankensteinbeck

    March 7, 2014 at 1:05 pm

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:
    If Kessler was really interested in the truth and his fact checking was reliable, he might get some respect from somebody.

  144. 144.

    Cassidy

    March 7, 2014 at 1:10 pm

    What is it with the name Glenn and be a dishonest hack?

  145. 145.

    gogol's wife

    March 7, 2014 at 1:19 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    I stopped reading that column when I got to the word “Look,”

  146. 146.

    Calouste

    March 7, 2014 at 1:21 pm

    It’s @Hal:

    Jesus gave out one of the largest free lunches in history.

  147. 147.

    gogol's wife

    March 7, 2014 at 1:24 pm

    @maya:

    Oh, please, don’t malign Horace Debussy Jones!

  148. 148.

    burnspbesq

    March 7, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    @D58826:

    Or maybe he will be in the 2016 presidential front runner. He certainly looks better shirtless than Christie!

    It was one thing to call Grandpa Walnuts a native-born citizen because the Panama Canal Zone was kinda-sorta part of the united States. Applying that principle to St. Petersburg may be a bit of a stretch, unless you’re prepared to argue that St. Petersburg, Russia is really part of St. Petersburg, Florida.

  149. 149.

    Bubblegum Tate

    March 7, 2014 at 1:37 pm

    @Chris:

    I remember reading a theory about Birthers that said that for some of them, whether Obama actually faked his birth certificate or not was irrelevant: it was the kind of thing he would do, whether or not he’d actually done it, because he’s a sneaky underhanded lying cheating… you know.

    I encountered that sort of argument when that one girl scratched a backward “B” onto her cheek and claimed that deranged Obama supporters did it. Wingnut jumped on it right away, proclaimed it “Naziism 2.0,” and insisted that “this is what the left was, is, and always will be all about.” Man, did he get an amazing rant off.

    And then even his fellow wingnuts started saying, “Hey, you know, I don’t think her story adds up. Why is the B backward, anyway?” And he ultimately had to admit that the whole thing was a really weak attempt at a hoax. So when pressed about his earlier rant, he replied, “It’s all your fault, anyway. This is absolutely the sort of thing The Left does. Change your ways, and I won’t believe these sorts of stories anymore, but for now, I do believe them because they accurately describe you.”

    It was an amazing display. It actually left me speechless for a bit.

  150. 150.

    Bubblegum Tate

    March 7, 2014 at 2:19 pm

    @gvg:

    There aren’t enough nice ladys who can do that though there are some. Programs like snap help more numbers even though they aren’t personal love.

    Several months ago, I read about a report on how much aid comes from private charities vs. public assistance. The disparity was even greater than I thought:

    “Virtually every church, synagogue, and mosque in the country is now gathering up food and distributing, and all of that work that food banks do comes to 5% of the food that needy people get,” said the Bread for the World president, Reverend David Beckmann. “95% comes from school breakfasts, lunches, food stamps and WIC, so Congress can say ‘We can cut this program 5% per cent – no big deal.’ But if you cut the national nutrition programs 5%, you cancel out everything that the charitable system is doing.”

    Which kinda puts a pin in the wingers’ “private charity will pick up the slack once we cut public assistance!” balloon. Not that I expect them to deal with the facts, of course.

  151. 151.

    opiejeanne

    March 7, 2014 at 2:31 pm

    Could someone please explain to me what the wingers are fussing about with regard to Obama’s illegal use of Executive Orders? My God, it’s in the local weekly rag this week, which never allows this crapola but the writer squeezed it in because it was marginally about our local rep, Suzan Del Bene.

  152. 152.

    ellie

    March 7, 2014 at 2:35 pm

    I never bought lunch the entire 12 years I was in school. My mom made me peanut butter and jelly every day and I loved it. She always had just the right amount of peanut butter and the right amount of jelly. When I go home this summer I am going to ask her to make me one.

  153. 153.

    Trollhattan

    March 7, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    Paul Ryan would gladly be at the school in Salt Lake City that took away and threw out those kids’ subsidized lunches. “Gimme that lunch, you little moocher fuck!”

  154. 154.

    Trollhattan

    March 7, 2014 at 2:46 pm

    @ellie:

    Because this is Balloon Juice, you need to ask her for “a sammich.” Remember, now, for the rest of us.

  155. 155.

    Jebediah, RBG

    March 7, 2014 at 3:04 pm

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    they reply that this or that tangential claim may be questionable but it illustrates a larger truth they believe in.

    So they build their larger truths on known falsehoods?
    I suppose pointing that out wouldn’t faze them either.

  156. 156.

    cckids

    March 7, 2014 at 3:19 pm

    My sentiments about Paul Ryan’s remarks are best summed up by a commenter at that RS article:

    Dear Paul Ryan,

    I am one of those people on the left you claim do not know what love is. I was working full time and I was poor. I did not go to movies, out to eat, or even have a TV. I gave my child the food and ate nothing. I was starving, in the literal sense. There was not enough food to put in a bag of any sort. My life changed when a coworker told me about WIC.

    Kiss my ass, you worthless excuse for a human being. You are unfit to judge others, and unfit to use the word “love”.

  157. 157.

    Trollhattan

    March 7, 2014 at 3:31 pm

    @cckids:

    And, there it is. Amazing to me how much energy he puts into denying his own past. At least the biblical Judas had the “decency” to hang himself.

  158. 158.

    Svensker

    March 7, 2014 at 3:46 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est

    Of course, you can tell if it’s Canadian pr0n if one of the participants is wearing a toque. An occasional “eh” is helpful as well.

    Pronounced “too-k”.

  159. 159.

    Another Botsplainer

    March 7, 2014 at 4:04 pm

    @I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet: That was hilarious, except someone needs to phonebook that pasty fat white shitheel from Fox.

  160. 160.

    schrodinger's cat

    March 7, 2014 at 4:12 pm

    @gogol’s wife: Good call.

  161. 161.

    opiejeanne

    March 7, 2014 at 4:42 pm

    @Svensker: And I’ve been seeing it spelled “tuque”.

  162. 162.

    GregB

    March 7, 2014 at 5:34 pm

    @gogol’s wife:

    Satchela my boy!

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