Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

the 10% who apparently lack object permanence

“In this country American means white. everybody else has to hyphenate.”

If you still can’t see these things even now, maybe politics isn’t your forte and you should stop writing about it.

Trumpflation is an intolerable hardship for every American, and it’s Trump’s fault.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

I am pretty sure these ‘journalists’ were not always such a bootlicking sycophants.

You know he’s going to shit a cat.

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

He wakes up lying, and he lies all day.

This chaos was totally avoidable.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

People really shouldn’t expect the government to help after they watched the GOP drown it in a bathtub.

Every decision we make has lots of baggage with it, known or unknown.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

“Everybody’s entitled to be an idiot.”

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

They are not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

T R E 4 5 O N

They fucked up the fucking up of the fuckup!

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

Giving in to doom is how authoritarians win.

You are here: Home / Politics / Politicans / David Brooks Giving A Seminar At The Aspen Institute / Not all good things come to an end, only a chosen few

Not all good things come to an end, only a chosen few

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The fake Cokie Roberts twitter feed was an epic bit of trolling:

Lots of journalists have been retweeting the misguided Applebee’s queries. BuzzFeed’s Andrew Kaczynski speculated the whole thing may be an “Applebees viral marketing campaign.”

In 2009, Roberts told a crowd at the Newseum that Twitter is a “rude” and “appalling” technology, according to The Hill newspaper. Perhaps that was inspiration for the hoaxster.

The that powers that be Twitter has since closed the account and deleted the tweets.

The Applebees angle makes me think that the hoaxster may be one of you.

Your secret’s safe with me.

Reader Interactions

41Comments

  2. 2.

    SparkleMotion!

    Couldn’t have happened to a better* gal.

    *By “better” I mean more insufferable, more intoxicated by her own pretend insight, and more representative of the beltway press’s self-obsession.

  4. 4.

    Schlemizel

    being a cranky old fart I refuse to tweet in any way shape or form. I missed the whole thing!

  8. 8.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    So when are they going to get around to shutting down the fake David Brooks satire that’s been trolling the NYT for years now?

  9. 9.

    ericblair

    I’ve been tweeting, but it’s probably the chili. Sorry.

    I gotta agree that most tweets aren’t worth the two seconds to read them; however, it’s because they’re generally shallow and stupid and not “rude” and “appalling”. I guess I’m more concerned about usefulness and insight more than whether someone says fuck or not. I’ll try to work on that, I guess.

  11. 11.

    J. Michael Neal

    @Schlemizel: I got the scores right, just the days reversed. Perfect in three out of four dimensions.

    North Dakota is pretty good, though I’ve had a suspicion for a couple of years that they play harder against us than anyone else for obvious reasons. Their big problems are a lack of finishers and an appalling lack of discipline. JLam took some epically dumb penalties on Sunday and her sister finished a 4-2 game in the box.

    We had stretches where we didn’t look very good in both games. I can’t decide whether this shows some weaknesses or whether it’s just a good sign that they can fail to play their best and still beat a good team. On the upside, there aren’t a lot of teams on the schedule that are fast enough to exploit those weaknesses.

  12. 12.

    J. Michael Neal

    The Applebees angle makes me think that the hoaxster may be one of you.

    It makes me think that it’s one of you, Doug.

  13. 13.

    kindness

    It wasn’t me. I’d have made Cokie to be all the things she hates. How much awfullness can one fit into 140 characters?

  14. 14.

    Donut

    This is good news for John McCain, and obviously proves that the polls can’t be trusted save to show that Romney has the momentum.

  16. 16.

    MikeJ

    @kindness:

    It wasn’t me. I’d have made Cokie to be all the things she hates.

    Which is why yours wouldn’t have been as funny or believable enough to get other media types to pick it up.

  17. 17.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    @kindness: How much awfullness can one fit into 140 characters?

    I don’t know, but I believe this is the research question Twitter was conceived to answer.

  18. 18.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @ericblair: I made a dismissive, off-hand remark about twitter here once, and got comically enraged response from someone whose handle I never saw again, basically saying I was a stupid old who didn’t understand the innertoobz. Which is all true, but they were very mean about it.

  22. 22.

    leinie

    @J. Michael Neal:

    Saw Saturday’s score and thought “JMN was off by a day.” Didn’t realize you’d gotten Sunday too.

    You recovered from the flatness that is the flatness of ND’s Red River Valley yet?

  25. 25.

    J. Michael Neal

    @leinie: Somewhere around Alexandria the world became normal again. It may be the lamest continental divide around, but there was at least a bit of up and down.

  26. 26.

    scott (the other one)

    My good lady wife joined the twitter back in 2007, I think, when we’d first moved from the east coast to San Diego county and encountered our first wildfires not long thereafter. With no family or friends nearby, we turned to our local NPR station…which advised people to watch their twitter feed for up to the second updates. Sure enough, there were hundreds of locals updating the exact location of the fire minute-by-minute. Made several still sleepless nights much, much less stressful.

    So, sure, people can and do say insipid stuff on twitter all the time. But as far as I’m concerned, it’s more than worth it. And not just ‘cuz I say insipid stuff on twitter all the time.

  27. 27.

    Mnemosyne

    @ericblair:

    It helps to follow professional comedians and other funny people. George Takei (yes, of “Star Trek” fame) is one of the funniest Tweeters out there. If you watch “Downton Abbey,” Patton Oswalt does some very funny live-tweeting of it.

  28. 28.

    ericblair

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    I made a dismissive, off-hand remark about twitter here once, and got comically enraged response from someone whose handle I never saw again, basically saying I was a stupid old who didn’t understand the innertoobz.

    I’m expecting it. It’s not like public short message services are anything new, either, and don’t have their uses. In fact, this is about the only time I’m logged in to Twitter: there’s a major storm underway and short messages to a broad public are useful.

    As an enterprise IT guy, I can say with some confidence that one thing we don’t need right now is more useless content-free communication to already overloaded people. I’m not sure what the long-term strategy to capabilities like Siri is, but I’m guessing it’s to develop an actual useful automated assistant to filter through the megabytes of useless shit everyone gets every day into actionable information.

  29. 29.

    Maude

    @ericblair:
    I like Twitter. It depends on who you follow. I follow Bloomberg news, NASA and that sort of thing. NOAA has done great tweets since Sandy started.
    I don’t know about a lot of Twitter, because I ignore it.
    I do understand that it could be irritating and don’t blame anyone who hates it.

    Edit, I follow Mr. Johnson.

  31. 31.

    Southern Beale

    I was hoping someone would capture some screen shots, the fake Twitter account was hilarious. Apparently “Cokie” was confusing Google and Twitter and was trying to find the nearest Applebee’s location. It was so funny.

  32. 32.

    taylormattd

    Hahahaha.

    I love the whole “mistaken twitter / facebook for a search engine” genre.

    There is a great one about “Dad” opening a facebook account, and then, believing his status box is a search engine, typing a bunch of porn terms into it.

  39. 39.

    shortstop

    Jesus, that’s funny. But that song is firmly lodged in my brain now. I believe I’ll sing it to the dog in its entirety. She loves that shit.

    I did think of all of you while having “dinner” at an Applebees in Toledo this weekend. After 12 hours of canvassing, we just wanted to shove something into our pieholes, but I was very disappointed to discover that there is no fucking salad bar.

  40. 40.

    David

    Doug, once again you confirm my belief in your unerring musical taste be quoting from one of my favorite records ever.

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