I sort of feel worse than the time I rick’rolled you with the Whitey Tape, but for reasons I can not explain, this feels necessary:
Don’t hate me because I am beautiful.
This post is in: Assholes
I sort of feel worse than the time I rick’rolled you with the Whitey Tape, but for reasons I can not explain, this feels necessary:
Don’t hate me because I am beautiful.
Comments are closed.
kommrade reproductive vigor
Dear John,
D.I.A.F.
Sincerely,
krv
General Winfield Stuck
Since I am unable to play you tube, I won’t pad my record for getting ric rolled again by your diabolical tomfoolery.
JGabriel
Ok, while the Motley Crue video is up, I confess: I actually like the Norton Security ad that features Dokken facing off with a switchblade wielding chicken carcasse.
It just cracks me up. Yes, you can think less of me now.
.
Bootlegger
Dude, you were only gone 2 days.
mai naem
Just wondering how Jon Kyl feels about me not wanting to pay for his Viagra and Proscar because I am,like, never going to use it.
Fulcanelli
Not to worry, we have plenty of other reasons and I wouldn’t know you if I tripped over you anyway. However, the dog and cat hair all over your clothes and the awkwardly positioned mop might give you away.
/kidding
AhabTRuler
Ehh, I give you in return the most unintentionally funny nuclear holocaust song: Two Suns in the Sunset, off of the worst Floyd album The Final Cut. I always crack up at the “Daddy, Daddy” bit. It’s like Waters had totally given up on any notions of subtlety or wit.
JK
On C-SPAN’s Washington Journal this week, Sen. James Inhofe (R-OK), the godfather of global warming deniers, said that he will travel to the climate change summit in Copenhagen this fall to present “another view.” “I think somebody has to be there — a one-man truth squad,” he said.
h/t http://thinkprogress.org/2009/09/25/inhofe-god-cycles
Dave C
Wow, we must have pissed you off somehow, John. Otherwise, I don’t see how you could be so heartless as to inflict this upon us!
mai naem
Did Lily treat you like this soldier’s dogs treated him when he got back home?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNKOGsV5J7s
Singularity
Look, just because you have a miserable time traveling doesn’t mean you need to make the rest of us just as miserable. Chee-rist.
It is pretty funny looking at Motley Crue dressing up in glam clothes like friggin Poison and Ratt after the Satan/leather thing played out in L.A. They were always such a bunch of fucking followers. A year later, they were dressing up like Guns N’ Roses.
TenguPhule
It’s because Tunch is absorbing 80% of all light in the known universe, isn’t it?
Dejablue
Isn’t this more your style John?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXrU1GFqYEU
wasabi gasp
Back at’chya.
Jay in Oregon
@Dejablue:
I hope you weren’t being disrepsectful of the Muppets.
That show is still a concentrated source of awesome. :) I wish we had more like it today.
Dejablue
Not at all Jay, in fact Fozzie has a proud spot along side me at my desk! Muppets forever!!
Polish the Guillotines
Motley Crue?! Ugh.
Must… cleanse… palate…
Dave C
If you’re in need of a soul-soothing balm after that abomination of a music video, I suggest this:
Tool – No Quarter
Punchy
HAWKEYEZ BITCHEZ!
Bestest game I’ve seen in years. Blocked punt return for TD to take the lead? Unpossible. POSSIBLE!
It may take me a week to lose this hard-on.
Polish the Guillotines
@Jay in Oregon:
You said it. This has to be one of the greatest moments: Buddy Rich vs. Animal.
Fulcanelli
Hey John, here’s a gift that might cheer you up: Lowell George explaining his playing technique. For Little Feat fans…
The Dangerman
The way Vince Neal is holding the mic at about 59 seconds reminds me of the Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee thing. Thanks so very much.
Couldn’t you have linked this one (Rick Roll free).
Gina
I just wanted to post Bhangra Man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jw-tQTS3-Iw
And Bhangra Man vs. Evil Morris Dancer Man.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJ1mU3nD79c
JK
@Fulcanelli:
Thanks. Best link of the thread so far.
JGabriel
We’ve done the 80’s threads repeatedly. I think it’s time for:
Atrocities of the 70’s!
.
MikeJ
See you and raise
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-L0NpaErkk
Bootlegger
OH NOES! Its the Battle of the Lame Songs!!!
wasabi gasp
Hooked On a Feeling
stickler
Shall we infer that the rental Buick didn’t turn out to be so hot on the home-trip?
‘Cause otherwise, as a child of the ’80s, I have to say that that was the worst crap-metal song of the entire decade. And that’s saying a lot. A very hairy, scarf-laden, fireworky lot.
Stop the hating on GM.
wag
the 70’s had a whole lot of suck to balance the great stuff
This sucks
wag
…and this doesn’t
JGabriel
For instance, the 70s brought us the only, as far as I know, top 40 hit that was actually a paean to nocturnal emissions:
stickler
In the name of all that is holy, for the love of Judas Priest, I am departing this thread now.
Nothing good can come of what will follow. Abandon all hope, ye who read past Post 31.
JGabriel
And no one should ever forget that great artifact of the 70’s, sung by an actual Chevy Van!
And that’s all right with meeee….
.
wasabi gasp
@JGabriel: Midnight Tennesee? Are you sure it’s not Arkansas.
JGabriel
@wasabi gasp:
Bah, humbug. It’s just a typo.
.
JGabriel
It’s the 70’s all over again, folks!
We’re gonna blow it all Skyhigh!
PanAmerican
Seasons must change
Separate paths, separate ways
If we blame it on anything
Let’s blame it on the rain…
Girl, don’t go away mad
Now girl, just go away
Crusty Dem
Dammit, John, you’re drunk with power (at least I hope you’re drunk). I had to survive freshmen year in the dorms with roommates blaring “Kickstart my Heart”, which pretty much gives away my age (+/- one year). Goddamn were they awful…
And to everyone else who also felt the need to share something awful, I clicked every damn link. Screw you all (except Dejablue – have you heard the Cake version?), but especially you JGabriel. That’s just wrong.
Crusty +3
DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal)
I thought it was hilarious when I saw the Balloon Juice Whitey tape rickroll mentioned at Wikipedia.
I have yet to be rickrolled by anyone. Probably saved by my habit of not clicking on a link unless I have a reason to, but it is still funny that I have avoided it as many times as I have seen it done to others.
Maybe it’s because I haven’t rickrolled anyone?
JK
@JGabriel:
Watching this video is a form of enhanced interrogation.
Music like this HORRIBLE, ATROCIOUS, AND NAUSEATING makes me regret Thomas Edison’s pioneering work on the phonograph, Peter Goldmark’s invention of the long playing record, Les Paul’s pioneering work on the electric guitar, the work of John Atanasoff, Clifford Berry, John Mauchly, and J. Presper Eckert which led to the invention of the computer, the work of Ed Roberts and Forrest Mims which led to the development of the first home computer, the work of J.C.R. Licklider, Paul Baran, Vinton, Cerf, and Leonard Kleinrock which led to the birth of the Internet, Tim Berners Lee’s invention of the world wide web, and Marc Andressen’s development of Mosaic and Netscape Navigator.
I hope you’re feeling very happy and pleased with yourself now.
Fulcanelli
If you’ve got no stomach for the 70’s stuff and like the guitar…
The best fucking slide player alive, period: Sonny Landreth
Accept no substitutes.
JGabriel
Crusty Dem:
JK:
I am feeling the love! I feel love!
.
Crusty Dem
@JK: Seconded (great rant, btw). I’m pretty much ready to blow up my house, destroy my computer, trash my phone and go live in a cave, just so I don’t have to risk experiencing that again. For a second there, before I was able to close the window, I completely lost the will to live. the darkness was closing in.
It’s the YouTube equivalent of waterboarding.
wasabi gasp
@PanAmerican:
Just Go Away – Blondie
JK
@JGabriel:
Please correct me if I am mistaken.
Aren’t you the same person who posted comments on the fine distinction between art rock and progressive rock?
Aren’t you the same person who previously denounced and denigrated the music of Emerson, Lake, and Palmer and Yes?
JGabriel
Hey, I suffered through my child in the 70s. Now it’s your turn to relive all those seasons in the sun.
Hey, it’s not just me. Even Nirvana feels the pain!
.
jrg
Did anyone else see this idiocy?
A half-hour birther infomercial asking people to send in $30 for a bumper-sticker?
Whoever came up with this scam is a genius. It’s running in TX, TN, LA, MO, FL, AL, and LA. Nigerian spammers might refer to these areas as “target rich environments”.
General Winfield Stuck
KT Tunstall Other Side of the World
JGabriel
JK:
What’s your point? Are you accusing me of using my powers of musical discrimination and encyclopedic pop knowledge for the purposes of evil?
Bwaahaha! Go tie a yellow ribbon.
.
JK
@Crusty Dem:
I miss the good old days when asiangrrl, tattoosydney, steeplejack, general winfield struck, comrade mary, et. al. strove to find great music to post on the open music thread.
wasabi gasp
Seasons In The Sun should be played 24/7 over a loudspeaker on the Golden Gate Bridge.
Dulcie
@JGabriel: Midnight Tennessee? Really? LMAO!!! “cause I remember it as midnight fantasy. That’s an awesome mondegreen!
JK
@JGabriel:
YES.
NO SOUP FOR YOU FOR THE REST OF THE MILLENIUM.
Bill E Pilgrim
Great lexicon progress. You should mention that “I for one welcome our (insect) overlords” is directly from the brilliant writing at the Simpsons, here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N38z9gYOEIY
Dulcie
@JGabriel: The 70’s were truly the decade of the story song, weren’t they?
wasabi gasp
Horse With No Name – America
Skullduggery
Dejablue—
Thank you for the Muppets. After some further searching on YouTube, I found Mahna Mahna burlesque. This is now a magical evening.
RedKitten
There’s an ad in the left sidebar for a comic titled “Calamities of Nature.”
In my sleep-deprived haze, I keep thinking it reads “Catamites of Nature.”
Goddamn, I really need to get some sleep. Oh, and The Muppet Show was the absolute best, thankyouverymuch. Stadler and Waldorf were my favourites. And the sight of Animal pursuing Charo, while grunting “woman, woman, WOMAN!”…well, it warms the cockles of the heart, doesn’t it?
JGabriel
JK:
Oh, fine, you whiny ass titty baby, here’s a great song from the 70’s for you, call it a strawberry letter to sweeten your ears. Number 23 to be exact.
.
wasabi gasp
Summer Breeze – Seals & Crofts
Bill E Pilgrim
@DougL (frmrly: Conservatively Liberal):
The concept actually came up seriously during the election campaign, it was quite a controversy. People were saying that it was “great news” for McCain when it happened but others weren’t so sure. Check it out here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XDq49cORkY
JGabriel
@Dulcie:
Yes, truly. The story songs for ages. OF HELL!
(I was going to link that to Billy Joel’s The Piano Man, but apparently there are limits even to my evil.)
.
wasabi gasp
Grazing in the Grass – The Friends of Distinction
JGabriel
@wasabi gasp:
I see your Seals & Croft, and raise you an England Dan & John Ford Coley. We could go walking in a windy park, take a drive along the beach, or stay at home and watch TV.
You see really it doesn’t matter much to me.
.
Bill E Pilgrim
This is the most evil thread I’ve ever seen here.
I would have gone for years without remembering that “piano man” ever existed.
Linkmeister
Okay. A story song from the 1960s:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VMSGrY-IlU
Bill E Pilgrim
PS: One word:
Honey.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59BZxgohr9g
JGabriel
Dulcie:
I do my best. Don’t give up on us.
.
JK
@JGabriel:
Enjoy your Village People, Bay City Rollers, K.C. and the Sunshine Band, Leo Sayer, Rick Springfield, Sheena Easton, Barry Manilow, England Dan and John Ford Coley, Neil Diamond, Helen Reddy, Mac Davis, John Davidson, Bert Convy, Peter Lemongello, Bread, Bachmann Turner Overdrive, Guess Who, Iron Butterfly, Carl Douglas, Christopher Cross, and Corey Hart
Jason Bylinowski
@JGabriel: That was a hoot.
Anybody heard of the Monsters of Folk? It’s basically a supergroup featuring M Ward, Bright Eyes, and Jim james from My Morning Jacket. I just got the new album today and am pretty pleased with it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfcI2HliOIM
This is not even close to their best song but it’s all I could on the tubes right now. Folksy anthem rock from some of the best voices in the biz. If they just could get that guy from Fleet Foxes, it would be a perfect ensemble.
Anyway I’m basically so hopped on Maker’s and hydrocodone that I can barely type. I know one doesn’t mix the two if one plans to live very long, but my back went out on me earlier, and I didn’t want that to spoil my hard-earned drinking session so I just kinda said a prayer to Marilyn Monroe and let the beatings begin. Right now it’s freaking awesome but I’m already having premonitions of tomorrow’s headache so I better go fill up on water in a bit to head it off.
As Oscar Wilde put it, “Work is the curse of the drinking class.”
+ Eleventy
JGabriel
Bill E Pilgrim:
Thank you. For being a friend.
.
wasabi gasp
@JGabriel: As awful as some 70s songs can be, they all make me feel pretty damn good. That’s not a bet, though. ;)
Danny’s Song – Loggins and Messina
PanAmerican
The Villagers theme song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPKbCRkMlUM
You’re a rag-trade girl,
you’re the queen of porn
You’re the easiest lay on the White House lawn
JK
@Jason Bylinowski:
I like Tom Ashbrook. I also like listening to Teri Gross, Diane Rehm, Warren Olney, Christopher Lydon, Brian Lehrer, and Leonard Lopate.
MikeJ
Would a little more love make it right?
JGabriel
JK:
Dude, this is Atrocities of the 70s! (I said, “Hi!” She said, “Yeah, I guess I am.”)
Rick Springfield, Sheena Easton and Corey Hart, are just so 80’s, man!
By the way, is it just me, or does anyone else ever get Corey Hart and Corey Doctorow confused?
.
Steeplejack
One of my favorites: Feist on Sesame Street. “I love counting to the number 4.”
MikeJ
Does Corey Hart wear a cape and travel by hot air balloon?
Jason Bylinowski
love me some terry gross too, yes. i know she’s not nearly so attractive as her voice is, but dayam!, what a voice, and a great interviewer to boot.
The Main Gauche of Mild Reason
Totally random, but if any of you have “dentist phobia” like I do, a great site is http://www.dentalfearcentral.com
After neglecting the dentist out of sheer terror for years, I finally found that site and convinced myself that I needed an appointment. Of course, this was just as I notice three obvious cavities in my teeth…I suppose I’m fortunate that I get decent dental coverage as a grad student and can take advantage of the local dental school. But my parents, being self-employed AND dental phobic, are in an even worse situation and I worry about them.
To be honest, I think dentistry is sort of the next frontier for healthcare reform. As articles like this demonstrate, dental care is part of normal healthcare (lack of dental care can kill you). But we (and many other countries, including some socialized healthcare ones like the UK) still don’t think of it that way. Granted, I imagine the situation is much worse in the US where even people that have good HEALTH insurance often don’t have dental insurance.
JGabriel
wasabi gasp:
Standing on the edge of time, caught up in a world of uphill climbing, I never realized how happy they made me.
.
Linkmeister
@The Main Gauche of Mild Reason: Kaiser unbundled dental insurance from its health plan two or maybe three years ago. Since then I’ve been paying Kaiser $300/month and rising (now $349) for health insurance and a separate $30/month to Hawai’i Dental Society for dental insurance.
JGabriel
MikeJ:
He doesn’t?
.
The Main Gauche of Mild Reason
@ Linkmeister Figures.
Bill E Pilgrim
But let’s not forget the good things from the 70s. Also.
I saw this live during the Mad Dogs and Englishmen tour around 1971.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RnjWLVyMps
And while we’re there, the funniest video on the tubes ever, bar none:
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=55105814
JK
@JGabriel:
Try an association trick to avoid confusing the Coreys.
Corey Hart – Hart to Hart – mindless tv series starring Robert Wagner and Stefanie Powers, created by Sidney Sheldon, and produced by Aaron Spelling and Leonard Goldberg.
Corey Doctorow – E.L. Doctorow – critically acclaimed novelist and recipient of the PEN/Faulkner Award, the National Book Critics Circle Award, and the National Humanities Medal
You definitely know your atrocities from the 1970’s. You’ve managed to hit each and every bad note and then some.
wasabi gasp
You Don’t Have to Be a Star (To Be in My Show) – Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr.
JGabriel
@MikeJ:
It would if it were from the 70’s, but that song is from the 80’s. If you find one from the 70’s, let me know.
.
JGabriel
JK:
But sometimes I have dreams of good songs…
.
wasabi gasp
Love Hangover – Diana Ross
wasabi gasp
@JGabriel: That makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.
But, if I ever snap and let loose on the world with a rusty chainsaw, I’ll be listening to this:
You Light Up My Life – Debby Boone
MikeJ
Music video by Olivia Newton-John performing A Little More Love with John Farrar [Producer] (C) 1978 Geffen Records
JGabriel
Hmm, not a lot of people getting into the spirit of this, or at least not adding links to Atrocities from the 70’s! Mostly just me and Wasabi Gasp.
Well, that’s all-right, man. Right, Wasabi?
Yeah, it’s all-right. It’s ok. I’ll live to see another day. And to all the haters out there, I’ll just say: This thread is Stayin’ Alive!
.
JGabriel
@wasabi gasp:
Oh, man. That calls for respect: even I wasn’t evil enough to touch that one.
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Hey, it wasn’t just you suffering. It was all of us–me and you and a dog named Boo.
JGabriel
MikeJ:
Damn, I coulda sworn that was from the eighties. So wrong.
I bow before your superior 70’s atrocitidal knowledge.
.
Tattoosydney
@JGabriel:
Omg. I’m almost too ashamed to admit that thirty seconds into that I had to go to Itunes and buy the track. Cheese ahoy.
Steeplejack
@wasabi gasp:
Hey, hey, hey, hey. That’s actually a good song, damn it. When it first came out I thought for a few minutes it was Neil Young. Then I realized, no, the song was called “A Horse with No Neil.”
geg6
Whoever started the bad ’70s music stuff here should DIAF. I had to survive this shit in the original iteration, making every should-be-precious memory of school dances, the first awkward gropings with teenage boys, and every signficant moment a miserable experience with this as the basic soundtrack to my youth. I have worked hard to blot most of this dreck from my memory. And now you evil, evil people torture me with it in my old age when I am too weak and decrepit to punch you in the necks. Which is what you all deserve. Damn you to hell.
wasabi gasp
Obscure palette refreshment:
You & You/Little Ants – DNA
JGabriel
jrg:
But is it really more evil or idiotic than: this?
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Hey, you’re polluting this thread with some songs that actually have some claim to good-ness. Although the version by the Brothers Johnson was better.
I must force you to recalibrate with an afternoon delight. Now this is wretched.
JGabriel
@Tattoosydney:
Embrace your inner cheese surrender!
.
JGabriel
I don’t know if this atrocious or actually great: Do The Hustle!
.
geg6
wasabi gasp: Ooooo, bringing on the Debbie Boone is really the evilest thing I’ve ever seen anyone do. Though that counter blow of Starland Vocal Band is a pretty close second. Horrible people, you all are.
wasabi gasp
@Steeplejack: I like it too. Summer Breeze, as well. I’m a sucker for the 70s. One of my earliest and favorite memories is sitting in my mom’s Plymouth Valiant listening to Heart of Gold.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
Hey, I said it was a good song! It’s necessary to leaven the atrocities with occasional glimpses of beauty, if only to highlight the wretchedness with contrast. Like aural chiaroscuro painted on a canvas of ears and icepicks.
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
I’ll see your “Mandy” and raise you a “Claire.”
MikeJ
100 comments in and nobody has found a pony yet?
Steeplejack
Oh, by the way, it is still Saturday night, isn’t it?
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
Ooh, bringing up 70’s vocal bands. I gotta agree with geg6, that’s almost as evil as Debbie Boone.
You are so lucky I can’t find video with decent audio quality of Manhattan Transfer doing Chatanooga Choo Choo.
.
Martin
Fixedeth.
Steeplejack
I can feel myself getting into this way too much. Teh evil, it clutches at my heart! I’m melting . . .
Anyway, here is a fookin’ great song from the ’70s–“Go All the Way,” the Raspberries. Great guitar hook (1:47 in clip)!
Need a little bit of the good to wash out the taste of all the awful. Ngrr!
wasabi gasp
Sorry about the Debby Boone, everybody. It was uncalled for, I won’t do it again. Can we go back to the way we were?
MikeJ
Are we going to knock down the old grey wall and post good songs?
Steeplejack
Okay, back in action again.
You want a story song, d’ya? Be careful what you ask for.
Gravenstone
All right, you jackals forced my hand. BeholdThe Power of Gold.
I refuse to delve into the schlockier stuff Fogelberg churned out in the 70’s.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
Oh. My. God. A paean to pedophilia:
Ewww.
.
Linkmeister
@JGabriel: You got a problem with Manhattan Transfer?
And for some reason that reminded me of this 2000s song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBr8bXJyWSw
(Middle Age Blues Boogie)
Steeplejack
And the brothers got to represent . . .
Comrade Kevin
@wasabi gasp: Danny’s Song
Steeplejack
Gosh, all this song-slinging is makin’ me kind of thirsty. Perhaps a piña colada would hit the spot.
Gravenstone
Before he became King of the 80’s Soundtracks, This [Was] It for Kenny Loggins.
Linkmeister
@JGabriel: And in the same vein: Gary Puckett and the Union Gap’s Young Girl.
Gravenstone
And of course, who can forget when Kiss went disco!
Steeplejack
@MikeJ:
Are we going to [. . .] post good songs?
Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha. No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.
Linkmeister
And the ultimate country story song: A Boy Named Sue.
Okay, it’s 1969. Sue me.
This is the live one from San Quentin, meaning no bleeped out “son of a bitch.”
Gravenstone
One Last Kiss as an example fo 70’s without the suck.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
I think the crux of this, um, somewhat unorthodox relationship is captured in these lines:
But why in spite of our age difference do I cry
Each time I leave you I feel I could die
Nothing means more to me than hearing you say,
“I’m going to marry you;
Will you marry me, Uncle Ray?”
Good times.
Try to think outside the box, people.
JGabriel
Gravenstone:
You can discriminate amongst the schlockier stuff from Fogelberg? It’s all the same auld land syne to me.
We bought a six pack, and we … drank it in her car … we tried to reach beyond the emptiness, but neither one knew how.
Jeepers, that might be the first song here tonight that’s actually worse than I remember. And as anyone reading this thread can see, I have a pretty strong memory for trauma.
.
wasabi gasp
A couple of swell fellas. Enough booze and I just might sleep with the first one.
I Was Made For Dancing – Leif Garret
I Just Want To Be Your Everything – Andy Gibb
Tattoosydney
@JGabriel:
Are you sure you want me to do that?
(Warning: Contains Olivia Newton-John, ABBA AND Andy Gibb’s chest.)
Linkmeister
Funk 49, anyone?
(J Geils reminded me of the James Gang)
wasabi gasp
@Comrade Kevin: Me First And The Gimme Gimmes – best cover band evah!
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
It’s so hard to stop once you get started. It’s like … purging.
.
Steeplejack
Can’t believe we forgot this gem, which cemented the grand American tradition of substituting pointless symbolism for actually doing something constructive.
God, someone stop me before I link again. I feel like one of those serial killers who taunts the cops in hopes of being captured and put out of his misery.
But, hey, as long as I’ve got your attention, who could forget Tony Orlando’s contribution to the story-song genre?
Linkmeister
Summer Breeze wasn’t the only schlocky thing Seals and Crofts put out: Hummingbird.
Linkmeister
@Steeplejack: I’ll see your Tony Orlando and Dawn and raise you The Captain and Tenille.
Yes, you know what that has to be.
Gravenstone
We now return you to our leisurely schmaltz and schlock cruise to Thunder Island.
Steeplejack
@Gravenstone:
Again: hey, hey, hey, hey. Hold up, pard. No one who has this song to his credit need ever apologize for anything ever again, no matter what tit-sucking pap it may be. ‘Nuff said.
MikeJ
That made me start trying to think of everybody who hosted a variety show and thus might have put out an album. No suck luck with Shields and Yarnell.
JGabriel
@Tattoosydney:
You know, for some reason, I remember this as a bad song, but listening to it now, it’s a lot better than I remember. I couldn’t even find any especially egregious lyrics to mock: feel the beat from tambourine, oh yeah …
(The costumes are pretty awesomely mockworthy though.)
.
wasabi gasp
@Gravenstone: I had every friggin Kiss album back then, even the solo albums. The family dog peed all over them.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Jeepers, that might be the first song here tonight that’s actually worse than I remember. And as anyone reading this thread can see, I have a pretty strong memory for trauma.
Heh. A touch, sir, a definite touch.
I’m having a timeout while I listen to the long version of “Angry Eyes” I threw out above. Fuck, that is good. Maybe the ’70s weren’t a complete musical wasteland after all.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
Dude, I covered that one almost a hundred posts ago.
Although linking it again does give the thread that repetitious AM radio feel, so no harm done.
.
Steeplejack
Gosh, it doesn’t quite make the cut–1980–but this thread is making me feel like I’m turning Japanese. I really think so.
MikeJ
My name is Michael(J)
I’ve got a nickle….
Santiago
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I0fle64w2IU
creepy.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Yes, but right now I’m stuck on the bingeing part. Urk.
Linkmeister
I confess there are a few Barry Manilow songs I like, and Copacabana is one of them. This is an amusing video: look for the Three Stooges.
Gravenstone
Oh, the 70’s certainly were no bereft of talent.
Conquistidor
What’s Going On
It’s Too Late
Sadly, the garbage tended to vastly outnumber a lot of the gems.
Steeplejack
@Linkmeister:
Sir, you know you have taken us to the brink of the abyss with that. Let the consequences be on your head.
Gravenstone
a’ight, what the hell happened to my edit button?
wasabi gasp
Brand New Key – Melanie
Linkmeister
@Steeplejack: I admit I like Angry Eyes a lot better than Muskrat Love.
The version L&M did in their 2007 reunion show in Santa Barbara is pretty good too; neither of ’em has lost any chops.
Steeplejack
@MikeJ:
God, Shields and Yarnell?! Dude, if you’re going to open up the whole festering, gangrenous wound of ’70s pop culture, then I’m outta here. I thought we were playing Cole rules–music videos only.
Linkmeister
@Gravenstone: I think I’m on my third copy of Carole King’s Tapestry album.
MikeJ
@Gravenstone: If we’re still posting the occasional good song, How about Kangaroo?
Steeplejack
@wasabi gasp:
The family dog peed all over them.
As well he should.
burnspbesq
Way too much bad 70s stuff in this thread.
Herewith, industrial-strength brain bleach, courtesy of Graham Parker and the Rumour.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4KAI0v3oX0
JGabriel
@wasabi gasp:
Even with that lead-in, I still can’t bring myself to link anything from Shaun Cassidy. I mean, I watched a half minute or so, but thought it would be Just. Too. Cruel. To link to Da Doo Ron Ron.
.
wasabi gasp
@JGabriel: Yeah, I thought about adding Shaun in with those guys, then I thought again.
Linkmeister
@JGabriel: Would you accept Cassidy’s predecessor, Rick Nelson?
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
Hey! That’s not only from the 80’s, it’s a good song!
It’s ok to break one rule, but two? Sheesh.
.
burnspbesq
@geg6:
Would you like to dance with me?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUtcRcfrLF0
Bill E Pilgrim
@JGabriel: Oh no that’s the whole thing with that ABBA song, it went from silly to sort of cool to actually kind of wonderful, in retrospect.
It has to do with song genetics, context, and a bunch of other things no one really understands.
JGabriel
Oh, shit. I just realized something.
When he sees this thread, I am so gonna be on John Cole’s shit list tomorrow.
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Well, excuse me all to hell. I came late to the thread and threw in a Feist clip to what I thought was an innocent trip through the back lots of Sesame Street nostalgia. Little did I know that I would be walking into a free-fire zone of ’70s flashbacks that would have me reaching unconsciously for my gold chains, my big-lapel shirts and my M-16 with the duct-taped banana clips.
“Wojohowicz! Rico! O’Hanlon! Littlejohn! Gooks in the wire! Gooks in the wire!”
. . . Damn it! 1982. Okay, how abut this–his contribution to the story-song genre.
burnspbesq
And for the slow-dance portion of the program …
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Red3R17FlUQ
Gravenstone
Mebbe I missed this earlier, but it’s no mercy time.
Convoy
JGabriel
wasabi gasp:
At least someone in the family had taste.
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
You bastard. You ratfucking bastard.
MikeJ
I make a point of forcing that song on at least one person every June 6th.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Oh, yeah. That’s why I’ve been gleefully piling on. “He did it, Mr. Cole. It was him.”
JGabriel
geg6:
Please don’t me, Geg6. I just wanna kiss you all over.
.
Gravenstone
Baby Come Back
While that song will always have a soft spot in my memory, dear god check out the related videos. A veritable who’s who of 70’s cheese in the early links.
MikeJ
I’m solid gold
I’ve got the goods
They stand when I walk
Through the neighborhoods
JGabriel
JGabriel:
Supposed to be: Please don’t hate me, Geg 6.
Sigh. Really missing that edit button.
.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
I may have corrupted you all, but let’s face it: you wanted to be corrupted.
.
MikeJ
I’ll never be over Macho Grande.
Steeplejack
Okay, I’m on the ropes, trying to catch my breath and getting the cut-man to look at one of my eyes. Trying to reach deep and dig out something to get me out of this George Clooney “Damn! I’m in a tight spot!” situation.
All right, I’ll try a little misdirection. This song is cheesy, but I like it anyway. Discuss.
wasabi gasp
Nite folks, the pillow is calling. Time for some dreamweavin’.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
I agree. Geg6 is such a sexy thing.
JGabriel
Y’know, David Naughton may be a well-respected character actor nowadays, but there was a time when he was young and struggling, telling himself, “No more faking it, this time in life, I’m makin’ it. To the top. Whoo Whoo Whoo!”
(Yes, that’s the full 12″ Special Disco Version 7.5 minute version. Git down!)
.
Tattoosydney
@JGabriel:
Abba were a phenomenon of extraordinary proportions in Australia in the 70s. I find it very hard to dislike them – they made up so much of the soundtrack of my childhood. My brother was convinced he was going to become Mr Lyngstad. They can certainly sing, and their camp value can’t be understated.
burnspbesq
Time to stop screwing around, and bring out the heavy ammunition.
How about a little Grand Funk Railroad, Scarecrow?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DnSzCQ1NAA
burnspbesq
And a little Congressman John Hall as a chaser.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-IXJLgRnvs&feature=related
Steeplejack
@MikeJ:
David Naughton. David fucking Naughton. Just when I think this thread can’t get any worse, I get another pill shot that makes me realize that what I thought was agony before was just mild discomfort compared to this.
Okay, I’m swinging for the fences. Geneva conventions be damned. So far we’ve managed to avoid the D-word, but I’m bringing it. And, to add to the dirty-bomb, scorched-earth vibe, let’s throw in some bad humor. Suck. On. This.
OriGuy
These guys had one hit song in 1978, and they’re still playing it in 2007.
Head East — Never Been Any Reason
Steeplejack
@MikeJ:
God, you are sick, sick, sick. At this point I don’t know whether I successfully forgot Angie or mercifully missed it in the first place, but you brought it all back like the hot kiss at the end of a wet fist.
Bonus burn: a young(er) Doris Roberts, whom I hatey-hate-mc-hated on <Everyone Loves Raymond, a show I hated anyway even without her on it.
I am spent.
Steeplejack
@wasabi gasp:
Nice exit, bonewad. Leave like the rat deserting the sinking ship that you are.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
It’s kind of reminds me how all of those horrible K-Tel collections of 70’s singles always had that one GREAT song:
(First link is the original video, but the sound is kind of funky. The second link has better audio, but the video is just lyrics.)
.
Gravenstone
Just because I can…
Indian Reservation
Half Breed
And just to complete the set, Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves
Steeplejack
@Steeplejack:
Everyone Loves Raymond. Couldn’t bring myself to name the name.
JGabriel
Steeplejack:
This song is cheesy, but I like it anyway.
It’s kind of reminds me how all of those horrible K-Tel collections of 70’s singles always had that one GREAT song:
(First link is the original video, but the sound is kind of funky. The second link is a live version. The third link is a good quality copy of the original audio, but the video is just lyrics.)
.
Steeplejack
@burnspbesq:
Man, that is a great song–by the Animals! Jesus, I don’t see how GFR could screw that up so bad.
Steeplejack
Okay, I’m trying to salvage something before I pack it in and go to bed. This song is a little cheesy, but I always liked it a lot. It reeks of the ’70s to me, but in a good way. Which, we have demonstrated tonight, is an exceedingly rare thing.
Steep out.
Steeplejack
@Tattoosydney:
Just want to say that I always had a soft spot for “SOS,” despite hearing Pierce Brosnan bellow his way through it in Mamma Mia. [Shudder] That’s all I’m prepared to say at this point. This thread has sapped my vital essence. I need some rainwater and grain alcohol. Purity of essence. That is all.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Too true, bro’. I bought many an album because it had maybe two great songs on it floating in a sea of dreck. Remember the days of the cut-out bins?
Steeplejack
Well, I was cleaning up the blood on the floor before leaving, and I noticed we almost got to 200 posts. Let me bonk that with another of my favorite songs from the much-maligned ’70s, Jesse Colin Young’s “Ridgetop.”
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
Man, you even scooped me on “Disco Duck.” This was not my night. Must retire to the Steep-cave and work on a new superweapon, or at least a new costume.
burnspbesq
There’s plenty more where these came from.
Firefall.
Linda Ronstadt singing a duet with Andy Williams.
Just sayin’
Consider yourselves warned.
Singularity
Time to blow this thread Sky High.
Steeplejack
@Singularity:
Blogger, please. JGabriel blew you sky high at #37. You were walkin’ around dead and didn’t even know it.
Now can you move that IV drip over here a little closer to my bed? Thanks.
Singularity
David Naughton is inspired. “Makin’ It” was the theme song from the show of the same name. Naughton basically played Tony Manero from Saturday Night Fever, although as a sitcom. Costarred John Travolta’s sister.
That video for “A Little More Love” makes me happy. ONJ was ridiculously hot and her voice was amazing. I was 11-12 when both of these songs came out, so of course they will forever be embedded in my soul.
Singularity
Damn, I did a search for it too! All right. But still a great song. It bears repeating.
Singularity
I was thrown off by the “midnight, Tennessee” thing…
And it’s late. And um, snarfle…
JGabriel
@Singularity:
Both true. Pity about the actual songs, though.
.
Steeplejack
@JGabriel:
You still up?
I’m not quite dead yet. Um, rrk–snzzz . . .
JGabriel
We can’t leave Atrocities of the 70’s without paying homage to the Garth Brooks of the 70’s: Take Me Home, Country Roads.
Mountain Mama!
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Singularity
Yeah, mostly. The chorus on “A Little More Love” still gives me a little chill. I must have some deep-seated memory based on it that I just can’t recall.
Speaking of which: Not really from the 70’s, but I have to. Girlfriend in high school made this “our song”. Shudder.
Singularity
Okay. I don’t see it anywhere above, which is hard to believe, and I may have missed it, but here it is star-spangled rodeo and all.
JGabriel
@Steeplejack:
Still here. That song is good, which is breaking the rules, but maybe it’s to switch over to the good songs from the 70’s – now that everyone is gone. I always like the bar best when it’s just a few people left at the end of the night, like hanging out in the kitchen at the end of party, listening to the radio (radio).
.
JGabriel
This is interesting. Joni Mitchell, 1970, BBC Live – California.
Sorry, Singularity, but I’ll Joni over ONJ any day of the week.
.
JGabriel
Anyone left? Is No One Recieving?
.
Singularity
Oh the potential for good stuff from the 70’s could last hours. I acknowledge the talent of Joni Mitchell, but I was more a fan of the British glam bands, the NYC protopunks, and some guilty pleasures.
HeartlandLiberal
It’s not the music. That was tolerable. It’s the fashion sense. My eyes, my eyes! The pain. How did we ever live through the 70’s and glam headbanger rock?
As for the greatness and awesomeness (and fond memories) of the Muppet Show, that is a constant in the universe (sort of like Tunch).
1. We lived in Nashiville and Hendersonville, TN, in the 70’s and early 80’s. John and June Cash bought the center two minute commercial insert in the Muppet Show, that was airing in prime time then, for a video that had made to surprise their son, who was a fan, by singing happy birthday to him.
2. As for the Muppet Show itself, one of my favorite spots ever was when Linda Ronstadt was the guest, and did Blue Bayou, with muppet frogs popping their heads up and down in the set that had her walking through the swamp while singing. She was awesome, the Muppets were awesome.
And Miss Piggy had far more fashion sense than Motely Crue.
JGabriel
Hey, Hey, Indians Coming! New thread.
.
Singularity
Apparently my comment is awaiting moderation because I linked too many things. But basically it was some of my favorite 70’s stuff including Bowie, T. Rex, Mott, NYDolls, Ramones, and Cheap Trick.
wasabi gasp
Arrrrgh, I can’t sleep. Must be a Marquee Moon or something.
SiubhanDuinne
O/T but this thread reminded me: could we please have a lexicon definition for rick-rolled, ric rolled, rick’rolled or however you spell it? Thanks!
Obama Death Panel Chairman (formerly glocksman)
@Singularity:
I had the serious adolescent hots for Olivia back in grade school as well.
I must have seen Xanadu 20 times or so at the local dollar theater.
Of course I was young and stupid at the time to the point I didn’t get the ‘date me’ vibes from the attractive classmate who would grope me in the hallway and say ‘you know you like it’ when I complained.
If I only knew then what I know now. :)
asiangrrlMN
Dear Late-Night Balloon Juicers, I say this with utmost respect and sincerity: Fuck you (especially JGabriel). As someone with CDO (Compulsive Disorder Obsessive, Alphabetically-correct), I had to click on every. damn. link. Thank god my CDO isn’t so bad that I had to listen/watch the whole video each time.
I had to learn You Light Up My Life in sign language when I was a Brownie (shut up, I was). My dad loved, Knock Three Times, and he owned the LP.
And, I am ridiculously proud that my snarky definition of meme made it into the BJ Lexicon under internet meme. Yay, me!
Jay in Oregon
@asiangrrlMN:
Heh. I avoided this thread as best I could.
Not much of a change this weekend so far. I kept a couple of old, broken promises, and she asked me if I wanted to have munch with her, but not much else.
My moods seem to have straightened out. Now I need to figure out how to get 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep — I can go for 4, then I start waking up every hour or two.
Jay in Oregon
“munch” should be “lunch”, of course. Mac users like to edit things too.
Jay in Oregon
Zapping cookies to see if that helps anything…
Jay in Oregon
I love the Mark Hamill/C-3PO/R2D2 episode of the Muppet Show; it’s one of the few reminders we have left (since Lucas tries very hard to pretend that the Star Wars Holiday Special never existed) that Star Wars didn’t always take itself so seriously.
Mark Hamill appeared both as himself and as Luke Skywalker, and we had the inevitable Miss Piggy-as-Princess-Leia and Gonzo as “Darth Weirdo”, wearing a Darth Vader helmet with the trademark Gonzo nose.
My favorite episode of the Muppets, I think, is the one with Harry Belafonte. The number he does at the end, with a collection of unique African-themed Muppets, was pretty impressive.
Of course, there’s the Gene Kelly episode where the Muppet crew tries to get him to do Singin’ In the Rain and he keeps creatively dodging it until the end.
asiangrrlMN
@Jay in Oregon: Munching at lunch. That’s a good thing. Glad to see that you’re doing better. Yeah, I should have avoided this thread, but once I started clicking, I just couldn’t stop!
Ked
Am I the ONLY person on this thread who enjoys Motley Crue?
I’d forgotten about them for a decade or so until I stumbled into a couple of full concerts while channel-surfing past Palladia. Yes, they’re a bunch of posers. Yes, the stage show is gratuitously over the top. No, they’re not a real metal band, nor were they ever. But by the standards of 80s/90s ballad rock, by the quality of their current live performance, by the plain exuberance of the music… they’re in my current playlists.
Now, if you want real metal, I’m listening to a lot of Wolves in the Throne Room and Moonsorrow (note the price on that album – may be the best deal I’ve gotten on music ever). Good for the soul.
Morbo
Darn, this looks like it was a fun one. My 70’s contribution: Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia’s greatest love machine. Oh, and of course its metal cover.
Steeplejack
@asiangrrlMN:
I had to learn “You Light Up My Life” in sign language when I was a Brownie [. . .]
Aw, who’s a cute little Brownie? You are! You are! You’re a cute little Brownie! Nom-nom-nom-nom!
Just now back to the land of the living after a long work shift, the horror that was this thread and a few hours of much-needed sleep. Although sleep that was laced with dreams of ’70s music. The horror, the horror. Should have listened to stickler last night.
Steeplejack
@Ked:
Am I the only person on this thread who enjoys Mötley Crüe?
I sincerely hope so.
asiangrrlMN
@Morbo: I’m so fucking tired, I thought the first link was a parody of Bohemian Rhapsody (the name of the band plus the name of the song oh never mind).
@Steeplejack: Bite me. No, wait. Er, DIAF. My mom made me.
Sleeper
@Ked:
No, you’re not the only metalhead here. This place seems to be overrun by Deadheads, though, so tread cautiously.