• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

Jesus watching the most hateful people claiming to be his followers

I don’t recall signing up for living in a dystopian sci-fi novel.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Text STOP to opt out of updates on war plans.

Consistently wrong since 2002

When they say they are pro-life, they do not mean yours.

Never give a known liar the benefit of the doubt.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

The words do not have to be perfect.

Oppose, oppose, oppose. do not congratulate. this is not business as usual.

I am pretty sure these ‘journalists’ were not always such a bootlicking sycophants.

When you’re in more danger from the IDF than from Russian shelling, that’s really bad.

Giving in to doom is how we fail to fight for ourselves & one another.

They were going to turn on one another at some point. It was inevitable.

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

Narcissists are always shocked to discover other people have agency.

The Giant Orange Man Baby is having a bad day.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

Hot air and ill-informed banter

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Mobile Menu

  • 4 Directions VA 2025 Raffle
  • 2025 Activism
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2025 Activism
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Lamest Defense Yet

Lamest Defense Yet

by John Cole|  August 5, 200412:15 pm| 1 Comment

This post is in: Democratic Stupidity

FacebookTweetEmail

How damaging is the Swift Boat commercial? I think you can get an idea by the lame defenses being offered. This one is just a gem:

The Kerry campaign has denounced the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, saying none of the men in the ad served on the boat that Kerry commanded. The leader of the group, retired Adm. Roy Hoffmann, said none of the 13 veterans in the commercial served on Kerry’s boat but rather were in other swiftboats within 50 yards of Kerry’s.

Jim Rassmann, an Army veteran who was saved by Kerry, said there were only six crewmates who served with Kerry on his boat. Five support his candidacy and one is deceased.

So, when I run for President, and some people in my platoon denounce my candidacy, all I have to say is:

“Hey- they were never on the same 4 man tank as me. Often when we moved in formation, the other tanks were 100 to 200 yards away.”

Snicker.

But don’t worry- Media Matters is on the story. David Brock and Duncan Black probably can sniff out who the liars are!!!

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Congrats
Next Post: Let The Ad Hominems Begin »

Reader Interactions

1Comments

  1. 1.

    M. Scott Eiland

    August 5, 2004 at 10:28 pm

    Well, they can find two right off the bat just by looking in the nearest mirror.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

On The Road - Captain C - Netherlands, September 2024 Part 11: Amsterdam Part 4
Image by Captain C (12/4/25)

2026 Pets of Balloon Juice Calendar

PLEASE REVIEW YOUR INFO ASAP

Recent Comments

  • Jay on War for Ukraine Day 1,379: You May Not Be Interested In Putin’s World War, But Putin’s World War Is Definitely Interested in You (Dec 4, 2025 @ 9:57pm)
  • Steve in the ATL on Thursday Night Open Thread (Dec 4, 2025 @ 9:57pm)
  • Westyny on War for Ukraine Day 1,379: You May Not Be Interested In Putin’s World War, But Putin’s World War Is Definitely Interested in You (Dec 4, 2025 @ 9:56pm)
  • Gloria DryGarden on Thursday Night Open Thread (Dec 4, 2025 @ 9:56pm)
  • frosty on Thursday Night Open Thread (Dec 4, 2025 @ 9:55pm)

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
On Artificial Intelligence (7-part series)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)
Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup

Social Media

Balloon Juice
WaterGirl
TaMara
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
DougJ NYT Pitchbot
mistermix
Rose Judson (podcast)

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!