Chuck Norris can bore just about anyone, I know — but anything? Wow. That’s some serious chi, dude.
8.
Ed Drone
Well, in terms of really strange campaign ads, this goes on my shelf right next to Mike Gravel’s toss-the-stone-into-the-lake one. I didn’t go over to Redstate to see what they said, ’cause I won’t give wingnut sites any traffic if I can possibly help it. So what did they say that we haven’t said (minus the “damn those liberals” language)?
Ed
9.
Zifnab
Yaaa…Chuck Norris jokes. The fad of last year.
I remember when I saw Jay Leno break into “All Your Base Are Belong To Us” jokes, and knew the fad was truly dead. When your 72-year-old grandmother gets the joke… game over.
Of course Huckabee should have said “I’m Mike Huckabee, Chuck Norris’ bitch, and I approve this message and provided I suck his dick well later Norris will approve me”
Semi-related: entomb LOLcats, TEH, typing a series of ones instead of exclamation points, place the tomb on a boat, set the boat on fire. I think it was on Excalibur.
12.
Ugh
Speaking of insane and Redstate, this Moe Lane piece really does take the cake.
13.
Billy K
Semi-related: entomb LOLcats, TEH, typing a series of ones instead of exclamation points, place the tomb on a boat, set the boat on fire.
LOL!!!11 LOLcats are teh funny!!1uno
14.
4tehlulz
entomb LOLcats, TEH
Now you’re getting personal.
15.
grumpy realist
How about entombing anyone who uses LOL (lol, all the other variants) in a posting?
Oh, wait, let’s just waterboard them. Since Patty et al. have decided that it isn’t torture.
16.
Jen
Well, mostly, Ed, they sidetracked. i thought for sure they’d think it was hilarious, based on my unpleasant foray into Malkin territory yesterday (“pimp my camel” is evidently the height of Republican wit), but mostly they digressed. I heard the audio of the ad on the Post Politics Podcast the other day (yes, I am a geek) and thought, wow, I guess Huckabee has just written off all chances of winning the nomination and just wanted to do something bizarre with his campaign money… I dunno, I can’t explain it.
It’s at least better than Mitt Romney’s ad which is about how great families are. You know how the Democrats’ priority Numero Uno is to outlaw families, and if the American public could name one reason why we’re on the wrong track it would be that we don’t love our families any more.
Actually, I agree that it’s a great ad. Very well done. Shows that Huckabee has humor, etc.
It’s fascinating to read the comment section over at RedState, by the way. They’re going at each other’s throats.
21.
Bombadil
It’s fascinating to read the comment section over at RedState, by the way. They’re going at each other’s throats.
Yeah, especially that whole section on banning smoking.
22.
Bubblegum Tate
FredState?
Ha! Good one.
I also like the book being advertised over at CommieProvince: “Whitewash: What the Media Won’t Tell You ABout Hillary Clinton but Conservatives Will.” Finally, proof of Hillary’s lesbian affair with Vince Foster (I know that doesn’t make sense, but I’m sure Brent “Dr. Zaius” Bozell has it all worked out). If it’s printed in a book, that makes it Known Fact!
23.
grumpy realist
Sometimes I really, really wish we had U.K. libel laws.
WTF, I’m completely blown away by the negativity of the attitudes toward Huckabee in the Redstate comments. This ad is very good, but apparently Huck is too much of a big-government liberal for them, so they want a real conservative like Guiliani. “Redstate – putting the ‘crazy’ back in ‘crazy’.”
WTF, I’m completely blown away by the negativity of the attitudes toward Huckabee in the Redstate comments. This ad is very good, but apparently Huck is too much of a big-government liberal for them, so they want a real conservative like Guiliani.
I noticed that too. They’re also quite positive about Fred. The problem is, though, that he’s a ‘moderate Republican’ according to some, which then results in a consensus: the only real conservatives are Hunter and… Tancredo if I remember correctly.
Then they go on to bitch that real conservatives don’t stand a chance after which…. they go at each other’s throat.
The anti-Huckabee stuff is weird, isn’t it? If I try to play anthropologist on Mars and think, if I were a conservative but I also wanted to win the election who would I support, I keep getting Huckabee. He seems to me to be both the Republican party line plus he is trying to rock that compassionate-conservative-nice-guy angle, too. I’m not saying he necessarily succeeds, but he seems a decent sort and it certainly seems to me like with the right campaign he could appeal to independents, but what do I know.
Giuiliani seems to me to be a nasty, mean-spirited, guy, not to mention much more wingnutty than he is portrayed as being, another chickenhawk, doesn’t toe the Republican party line, and it amazes me that he’s gotten the support that he has.
29.
4tehlulz
it amazes me that he’s gotten the support that he has.
Why are you surprised? He’s the most likely to drop a megaton on Mecca, so the mass-murder contingent in the GOP (e.g., Pat Robertson) is going to back him over everyone else.
30.
jenniebee
Oh good. The presidential campaign has gone Barrens chat. Super.
Finally, proof of Hillary’s lesbian affair with Vince Foster (I know that doesn’t make sense, but I’m sure Brent “Dr. Zaius” Bozell has it all worked out).
Well that’s probably true. I think you need to see the evidence before rendering judgement. Brent Bozell always argues in good faith.
Maybe you haven’t seen the good work he does at the Parents Television Council. Certainly grassroots activism at its finest.
32.
jaime
It WOULD have been funny if those Chuck Norris jokes were’nt stolen directly from the Family guy.
It WOULD have been funny if those Chuck Norris jokes were’nt stolen directly from the Family guy.
or the t-shirt in Spencer’s Gifts…
35.
Zifnab
Dude. Whatever. It’s Romney in the bag. Guiliani is going to cave because the religious right won’t back him. Their vote will get split between those people who can stomach a reformed hater – McCain, a Mormon, and Grandpa Fred.
Romney is soaking up all the Republican money that’s still out there like a wet sponge. And he’s the real Republican perfect candidate – a totally empty suit. The diehard rich who haven’t started backing Hillary will feel comfortable with him, because he’s a businessman. The social cons who can handle crazy always-on underwear will accept him into the Christian Coalition. And the “kill the brownies!” movementarians don’t have anything specifically against him, so he’ll get enough support there to swing it.
Once Mitt takes Iowa and New Hampshire, it’ll be all over when the authoritarians start lining up in neat little rows.
And then he’ll get absolutely clobbered by virtually anyone running on the Dem side of the ticket. Because this is 2008, and people won’t vote for George Bush three times in a row. Not even America is that dumb.
36.
slippytoad
I haven’t watched the ad. I just want people to understand: who the FUCK would vote for a President based on the opinion of a guy whose sole accomplishments of note in life are getting his ass royally creamed by Bruce Lee, and being the source of a half a million pages of repetitive Internet jokes?
37.
Peter Johnson
If I try to play anthropologist on Mars and think, if I were a conservative but I also wanted to win the election who would I support, I keep getting Huckabee.
Never mind that Huckabee is not a conservative. He’s a class warrior who holds some socially conservative positions. He’s basically an evaneglical John Edwards.
38.
Bubblegum Tate
sole accomplishments of note in life are getting his ass royally creamed by Bruce Lee, and being the source of a half a million pages of repetitive Internet jokes?
Hey, those aren’t his sole accomplishments. He also has this awesome piece of slapdash jingoism under his belt. I actually saw this when it first aired, and I had to wonder if I had secretly been dosed or something because it was so ridiculous. The one part that cracked me up the most (though it was hardly the only batshit-crazy part) was when Chuckie got his paratrooper on by jumping out of a Stealth fighter (seriously) that was going faster than the speed of sound (no, seriously).
I kept waiting for Crow and Tom Servo to show up.
39.
jcricket
He also has this awesome piece of slapdash jingoism under his belt.
“I’d like you to meet my kids, Walker and Texas Ranger”
Joe Bob Briggs (I believe) once published a bunch of rules for judging the “badness” of a movie. Having both a colon and a subtitle were automatic grounds for assuming a movie will be really bad. The trifecta was adding a roman numeral.
(I especially like the fact that the word “force” appears three times in a 6 word title).
40.
Cain
And then he’ll get absolutely clobbered by virtually anyone running on the Dem side of the ticket. Because this is 2008, and people won’t vote for George Bush three times in a row. Not even America is that dumb.
Ha! We’ll see, you never know. The president and on down to the press are trying to get Hillary elected because they think they can resurrect all the crap that went on before and start nailing her with some awesome swift-boating goodness.
If Hillary wins, we are going to see some of the worst election years ever. It’s going to be rumble in the jungle with money flying everywhere. The press is going to make a killing! :-)
cain
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JR
The only thing I could think of when I saw it was, “I guess Obama’s not the only one banking on young voters in Iowa.”
Hey, whatever keeps him from having to talk about supporting the “Fair”Tax…
Nicholas Weaver
You’d have to waterboard me to get me to vote for ANY republican presidential candidate, but that IS a really good ad
zmulls
Yeah, I’m going to vote for the candidate with the most entertaining ad. ‘Cuz that’s what I want from my government — entertainment…
Jake
Huck doesn’t have a chance of the White House, but at least he’ll be remembered for one he-larious ad. I wonder what he’ll do with Ric Flair?
There’s no chin…
Bwahaa!
Wilfred
Chuck Norris doesn’t get waterboarded.
He bored the water.
Ninerdave
Yaaa…Chuck Norris jokes. The fad of last year.
demimondian
Chuck Norris can bore just about anyone, I know — but anything? Wow. That’s some serious chi, dude.
Ed Drone
Well, in terms of really strange campaign ads, this goes on my shelf right next to Mike Gravel’s toss-the-stone-into-the-lake one. I didn’t go over to Redstate to see what they said, ’cause I won’t give wingnut sites any traffic if I can possibly help it. So what did they say that we haven’t said (minus the “damn those liberals” language)?
Ed
Zifnab
I remember when I saw Jay Leno break into “All Your Base Are Belong To Us” jokes, and knew the fad was truly dead. When your 72-year-old grandmother gets the joke… game over.
Dreggas
I pointed that out yesterday BWAHAHAHA.
Of course Huckabee should have said “I’m Mike Huckabee, Chuck Norris’ bitch, and I approve this message and provided I suck his dick well later Norris will approve me”
norbizness
Semi-related: entomb LOLcats, TEH, typing a series of ones instead of exclamation points, place the tomb on a boat, set the boat on fire. I think it was on Excalibur.
Ugh
Speaking of insane and Redstate, this Moe Lane piece really does take the cake.
Billy K
LOL!!!11 LOLcats are teh funny!!1uno
4tehlulz
Now you’re getting personal.
grumpy realist
How about entombing anyone who uses LOL (lol, all the other variants) in a posting?
Oh, wait, let’s just waterboard them. Since Patty et al. have decided that it isn’t torture.
Jen
Well, mostly, Ed, they sidetracked. i thought for sure they’d think it was hilarious, based on my unpleasant foray into Malkin territory yesterday (“pimp my camel” is evidently the height of Republican wit), but mostly they digressed. I heard the audio of the ad on the Post Politics Podcast the other day (yes, I am a geek) and thought, wow, I guess Huckabee has just written off all chances of winning the nomination and just wanted to do something bizarre with his campaign money… I dunno, I can’t explain it.
It’s at least better than Mitt Romney’s ad which is about how great families are. You know how the Democrats’ priority Numero Uno is to outlaw families, and if the American public could name one reason why we’re on the wrong track it would be that we don’t love our families any more.
OxyCon
Jonah Goldberg thinks Huckabee’s a scary liberal
http://cliffschecter.bravenewfilms.org/blog/19363-jonah-goldberg-thinks-huckabee-s-a-scary-liberal
Psycheout
Now THAT’s funny!
Whatever happened to FredState? I thought they were all grandpa all the time. That’s why I haven’t been there in awhile.
Now someone’s praising the Huckster? Too much!
Hmm, but I’d be careful not to get Chuck Norris angry with you. I don’t think you can take him.
bago
Irony tends to fail at … Evaluation.
Michael van der Galiën
Actually, I agree that it’s a great ad. Very well done. Shows that Huckabee has humor, etc.
It’s fascinating to read the comment section over at RedState, by the way. They’re going at each other’s throats.
Bombadil
Yeah, especially that whole section on banning smoking.
Bubblegum Tate
Ha! Good one.
I also like the book being advertised over at CommieProvince: “Whitewash: What the Media Won’t Tell You ABout Hillary Clinton but Conservatives Will.” Finally, proof of Hillary’s lesbian affair with Vince Foster (I know that doesn’t make sense, but I’m sure Brent “Dr. Zaius” Bozell has it all worked out). If it’s printed in a book, that makes it Known Fact!
grumpy realist
Sometimes I really, really wish we had U.K. libel laws.
Fwiffo
WTF, I’m completely blown away by the negativity of the attitudes toward Huckabee in the Redstate comments. This ad is very good, but apparently Huck is too much of a big-government liberal for them, so they want a real conservative like Guiliani. “Redstate – putting the ‘crazy’ back in ‘crazy’.”
Michael van der Galiën
Yeah.
I’m siding with the not-so-small-but-not-Bush-size-government-conservatives on that one though: no ban.
I wonder when they’ll start calling each other terrorist appeasing hippies.
Michael van der Galiën
I noticed that too. They’re also quite positive about Fred. The problem is, though, that he’s a ‘moderate Republican’ according to some, which then results in a consensus: the only real conservatives are Hunter and… Tancredo if I remember correctly.
Then they go on to bitch that real conservatives don’t stand a chance after which…. they go at each other’s throat.
cleek
stop misunderstanding me or you’re banned!!!!!
Jen
The anti-Huckabee stuff is weird, isn’t it? If I try to play anthropologist on Mars and think, if I were a conservative but I also wanted to win the election who would I support, I keep getting Huckabee. He seems to me to be both the Republican party line plus he is trying to rock that compassionate-conservative-nice-guy angle, too. I’m not saying he necessarily succeeds, but he seems a decent sort and it certainly seems to me like with the right campaign he could appeal to independents, but what do I know.
Giuiliani seems to me to be a nasty, mean-spirited, guy, not to mention much more wingnutty than he is portrayed as being, another chickenhawk, doesn’t toe the Republican party line, and it amazes me that he’s gotten the support that he has.
4tehlulz
Why are you surprised? He’s the most likely to drop a megaton on Mecca, so the mass-murder contingent in the GOP (e.g., Pat Robertson) is going to back him over everyone else.
jenniebee
Oh good. The presidential campaign has gone Barrens chat. Super.
/turns off General channel
Psycheout
Well that’s probably true. I think you need to see the evidence before rendering judgement. Brent Bozell always argues in good faith.
Maybe you haven’t seen the good work he does at the Parents Television Council. Certainly grassroots activism at its finest.
jaime
It WOULD have been funny if those Chuck Norris jokes were’nt stolen directly from the Family guy.
Psycheout
Better than this “Insanely Good” headline is one I noticed over at Politico:
“Young Voters Dig Giuliani’s Moderate Views.”
Now that’s just foul. There’s so many things wrong with that that I don’t know where to begin. Raise the voting age perhaps?
Dreggas
or the t-shirt in Spencer’s Gifts…
Zifnab
Dude. Whatever. It’s Romney in the bag. Guiliani is going to cave because the religious right won’t back him. Their vote will get split between those people who can stomach a reformed hater – McCain, a Mormon, and Grandpa Fred.
Romney is soaking up all the Republican money that’s still out there like a wet sponge. And he’s the real Republican perfect candidate – a totally empty suit. The diehard rich who haven’t started backing Hillary will feel comfortable with him, because he’s a businessman. The social cons who can handle crazy always-on underwear will accept him into the Christian Coalition. And the “kill the brownies!” movementarians don’t have anything specifically against him, so he’ll get enough support there to swing it.
Once Mitt takes Iowa and New Hampshire, it’ll be all over when the authoritarians start lining up in neat little rows.
And then he’ll get absolutely clobbered by virtually anyone running on the Dem side of the ticket. Because this is 2008, and people won’t vote for George Bush three times in a row. Not even America is that dumb.
slippytoad
I haven’t watched the ad. I just want people to understand: who the FUCK would vote for a President based on the opinion of a guy whose sole accomplishments of note in life are getting his ass royally creamed by Bruce Lee, and being the source of a half a million pages of repetitive Internet jokes?
Peter Johnson
Never mind that Huckabee is not a conservative. He’s a class warrior who holds some socially conservative positions. He’s basically an evaneglical John Edwards.
Bubblegum Tate
Hey, those aren’t his sole accomplishments. He also has this awesome piece of slapdash jingoism under his belt. I actually saw this when it first aired, and I had to wonder if I had secretly been dosed or something because it was so ridiculous. The one part that cracked me up the most (though it was hardly the only batshit-crazy part) was when Chuckie got his paratrooper on by jumping out of a Stealth fighter (seriously) that was going faster than the speed of sound (no, seriously).
I kept waiting for Crow and Tom Servo to show up.
jcricket
“I’d like you to meet my kids, Walker and Texas Ranger”
Joe Bob Briggs (I believe) once published a bunch of rules for judging the “badness” of a movie. Having both a colon and a subtitle were automatic grounds for assuming a movie will be really bad. The trifecta was adding a roman numeral.
A crowning example: Excessive Force II: Force on Force
(I especially like the fact that the word “force” appears three times in a 6 word title).
Cain
Ha! We’ll see, you never know. The president and on down to the press are trying to get Hillary elected because they think they can resurrect all the crap that went on before and start nailing her with some awesome swift-boating goodness.
If Hillary wins, we are going to see some of the worst election years ever. It’s going to be rumble in the jungle with money flying everywhere. The press is going to make a killing! :-)
cain