Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

White supremacy is terrorism.

This really is a full service blog.

Fuck the extremist election deniers. What’s money for if not for keeping them out of office?

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

The revolution will be supervised.

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

Red lights blinking on democracy’s dashboard

Optimism opens the door to great things.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

New McCarthy, same old McCarthyism.

Consistently wrong since 2002

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

No one could have predicted…

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

The party of Reagan has become the party of Putin.

In after Baud. Damn.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2008 / The Table

The Table

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So far Sarah Palin takes the following attacks off the table:

* Experience.
* Terrorist friends (what is Palin’s position on plastic explosives?).
* Crazy pastors who say offensive things.
* Upright family values (it’s private, fine, except that they’re marching the young couple around the convention and the McCain campaign won’t shut up about it).

Then there are the many ways that Palin enhances the perception that electing McCain essentially means a third term for George W. Bush.

* McCain’s decision itself: hasty, poorly though out, politically motivated.
* She serves the extreme Christianist fringe.
* Palin abuses power, fires employees for inappropriate reasons, replaces them with Michael Brown cronies (repeatedly as both mayor and as governor) then, in true Bush style, stonewalls the investigation and smears the investigators.
* Hates pork in words, loves it in practice.
* Cuts taxes in Wasilla and increases spending, leaving a city that had a balanced budget with more than $2,000 of debt per resident.
* Vindictive, intolerant of minor criticism, keeps a permanent enemies list.
* Lies about insultingly obvious things that practically dare the press to call her on it. So far she has falsely claimed to have won a Miss Congeniality prize at a beauty pageant, she denied any contact with the anti-American fringe Alaska Independence Party (multiple sources confirm that she attended their convention in 1994, she sent a video address this year and her husband was a longtime registered member), she claimed that she opposed the Bridge to Nowhere when her gubernatorial campaign was predicated on supporting it. The McCain has repeatedly, flagrantly lied about the vetting process (the latest fallback position: Palin filled out an extensive, probing questionnaire. That must be GOP-speak for ‘due diligence’).

To sum up, Sarah Palin nullifies John McCain’s most productive lines of attack and reinforces the narrative that hurts McCain the most. In exchange her presence adds a dulling buff to his maverick image (it’s hard to overstate the mistake that she made in emphasizing the Bridge story on day one). On the whole the only imaginable reason why Palin would make a good pick is if every other possibility was worse. That may be the case, but if so, what that means for the GOP is almost too depressing for words.

Reader Interactions

230Comments

  1. 1.

    rob!

    That may be the case, but if so, what that means for the GOP is almost too depressing for words.

    depressing? why? am i missing something?

    after the massive damage Bush/Cheney has wraught, I’d be ok if the Republican Party was summarily disbanded, permanently. then we’d have Democrats running everything forever.

    of course, they’d quickly f**k things up and it would require a new party to develop, but at least the main principles of the Democratic Party would return to the mainstream, instead of the all-bullying, all-bombing, all-hating-gays all-the-time that the Republicans have managed to sell to the country as “solid American values.”

  3. 3.

    rob!

    oops…those are blockquotes from the Bizarro World. sorry…i’m barely better at the internets than McCain, apparently.

    btw, did you hear he’s a POW? that excuses Sarah Palin from criticism, doesn’t it?

  5. 5.

    Radon Chong

    ‘tain’t depressin fer me!

    Oh, it’ll be plenty depressing when they win.

    …which, of course, they can’t possibly do. I mean, fer fuck’s sake, they can’t win, right? Right?!?

  6. 6.

    MNPundit

    How is it depressing? The GOP must be destroyed and replaced by something else, like the Fiscal-Liberty Party or something.

    Whatever, they must be obliterated and sent to the graveyard with the Whigs and Federalists.

  7. 7.

    gbear

    UprightUptight family values…

    & not in the everything-is-alright, Stevie Wonder sense of the word.

  8. 8.

    NR

    I don’t know. The Republicans are going full-tilt pushing back against the media. They may yet turn this around. I’ve seen them do it before.

    I have no doubt that she will deliver a successful speech tonight, and afterward, every Republican out there is going to be claiming that she knocked it out of the park, wowed everyone, and saved the Republican party. That’s the baseline from where we’ll start tomorrow. And it could get worse (for us) from there.

  9. 9.

    Andrew

    Actually, I think it would be great to roll out Hillary right now and have her start blasting Palin on foreign policy and economic issues.

  10. 10.

    gex

    That may be the case, but if so, what that means for the GOP is almost too depressing for words.

    If by “depressing” you mean “the most optimistic I’ve felt for our country in a long time” I’m right there with you.

  11. 11.

    Tim F.

    The Republicans are going full-tilt pushing back against the media.

    It’s a desperation move. They’re playing that out of a position of weakness rather than a position of strength and everyone knows it. What was bullying in 2002 is pathetic whinging today.

  12. 12.

    Deborah

    Detail: She did win Miss Congeniality at Miss Alaska; the other woman won at Miss Wassila. Or perhaps vice versa. But that tiny factoid is true.

    To edit Andrew: Have Hillary attack McCain. This contest is against McCain; Palin matters only in that she demonstrates his poor judgment and shoot first decision making style. The Rs are trying for a Palin v Obama narrative; don’t give it to them.

  13. 13.

    NR

    Here’s Sully on what’s going to happen:

    Just a word from the bleachers. In all likelihood, Sarah Palin will deliver a speech that will tear the roof off the Xcel Center tonight. Every single commentator on the cable and the networks will declare it a triumph. The base will exult at their Joan of Arc triumphing over the evil, despicable vile press, who have had the effrontery to ask a potential future vice-president of the United States basic questions about her life story and record. Such effrontery has now been greeted by a presidential campaign refusing to answer simple questions that anyone with access to Google can figure out. McCain’s relationship with the press corps has hit the ocean bed – which is ironic, since McCain has given the press the wackiest and most copy-ready nominee in recent history.

    Nonetheless, the GOP machine will ensure that her speech is great.

    She just has to read it from a TelePrompter. It’s not that hard. And the crowd will be lifting her up to the rafters.

  14. 14.

    jenniebee

    It’s like, you saw Dan Quayle, and you thought that the veep slot couldn’t be filled with anybody who formed more of a perfect combination of stupid, crazy, batshit religious wackjobisity (and even crazier spouse) than he was. And you thought that, you thought it for twenty years.

    And you were wrong to think that.

    We were all so very, very wrong.

  15. 15.

    cgp

    TimF,

    You’ve set it up wonderfully, and taken what I’ve written in emails to friends. I think you sum up the situation PERFECTLY. When on the attack, this is not about Palin specifically, but about their record demonstrates that the ticket is more about continuing all that is bad about the previous administration.

    Ideally, they stick to their core issues which are playing to the democrats – economy (and energy policy tangentially), and even foreign policy (but not experience, as that’s a dead point on both sides) I would presume there really isn’t any need to expand from that set of issues. Obama may be able to take Ohio and Michigan alone on these issues.

    Religion is a tough play (and dangerous), it’s already a core democrat issue and I imagine the blogosphere can keep the core together as I’ve seen enough selling out on McCains’ part and enough video on Palin that will turn away most secularists from their ticket.

  16. 16.

    maxbaer (not the original)

    Palin has taken any and all attacks off the table because they can’t attack while they’re busy defending the fuck up that is her nomination.

  17. 17.

    PC

    The GOP must be destroyed and replaced by something else, like the Fiscal-Liberty Party or something.

    pRon Aul!

  19. 19.

    Doug H. (Fausto no more)

    Palin rallied the base. Just from what I’ve seen around the Internets, this is looking to be the case.

    Nevermind that any hope McCain had of winning over disaffected independents went out the window, he did manage to rally the base. Now whether that will carry him over the top, I seriously doubt it, but the base will at least have their martyr.

  20. 20.

    Andrew

    Carly “HP Killer” Fiorina is doing a bang up job in making sure that McCain won’t be the worst speaker at the convention.

  22. 22.

    FLILF Hunter

    Could Fiorna and Whit be any more stiff?

    Is it just me, or does Carly Fiorina look like a Martin Short character?

  23. 23.

    NonyNony

    depressing? why? am i missing something?

    In a democracy, having only one working political party makes the whole thing dysfunctional. The fact that Republicans have chosen to destroy their ability to govern in exchange for winning elections has been depressing me since Newt’s crew trashed the Congress for that very reason.

    The only upshot of the Republican flame-out is that if you’re going to be stuck with a single party, the Democrats are the better choice. Not for ideological reasons, but more because no one mounts a better opposition to Democrats than other Democrats…

  25. 25.

    PhoenixRising

    This choice of VP makes one ask, Why do I get no results from the Google string and YouTube search, ‘Tim Pawlenty MN Governor +goats’?

    Palin rallied the 27%, all right. Good thing they were already, in Rogers’ phrase, ‘Bat-shit head-trauma crazy’..or that might have hurt the black guy running as Hercules ready to clean out the stables. As things stand, the Crazification Factor rides to the sound of Barack Obama’s voice. To vote for whoever is running against him. As it should be. And no performance on the part of Sarah Palin affects that.

  26. 26.

    PhoenixRising

    This choice of VP makes one ask, Why do I get no results from the Google string and YouTube search, ‘Tim Pawlenty MN Governor +goats’?

    Palin rallied the 27%, all right. Good thing they were already, in Rogers’ phrase, ‘Bat-shit head-trauma crazy’..or that might have hurt the black guy running as Hercules ready to clean out the stables. As things stand, the Crazification Factor rides to the sound of Barack Obama’s voice. To vote for whoever is running against him. As it should be. And no performance on the part of Sarah Palin affects that.

  27. 27.

    Dennis - SGMM

    The shorter Republican party, 2008: “You know all those things that we didn’t do when we had full control of the government for six years? The things that we said the free markets would take care of, even when the nation was at peace with a budget surplus? Well, we’re going to do them now! No, really.”

  29. 29.

    zzyzx

    So from the excerpts I read from the speech, it doesn’t seem bad. It’s like what you would expect a small state governor to give. And hey, if you ignore that she vetoed a bill to make the kind of alternative fuels she will speak out for, that’ll sound good. Still though, flip the attacks to the Republicans and the policies to the Democrats and does that speech come anywhere near primetime for the DNC?

    Oh and if you have to mention your PTA experience to explain why you’re ready to be VP, then you aren’t.

  30. 30.

    NR

    Still though, flip the attacks to the Republicans and the policies to the Democrats and does that speech come anywhere near primetime for the DNC?

    Doesn’t matter. She could get up there and say “Spam Spam Spam Spam” for 45 minutes and the Republicans and the pundits would still praise her to the skies as the savior of the Republican party.

    It’s not about the speech, it’s about how it’s spun. And you’d better believe the Republicans are going to be on the ball about that.

  31. 31.

    dr. bloor

    Mitt Romney is completely pathetic. I hope Palin gets shipped back to Alaska fast enough for Biden to rip him a new one during the VP debate.

  33. 33.

    TR

    Did Romney just call the Supreme Court — 7 of 9 appointees by Republicans — a liberal court?

    Did he just say Washington, with an eight-year Republican administration and six of the last eight years Republican House and Senate, is liberal?

    I think my head just exploded.

  34. 34.

    zzyzx

    “Doesn’t matter. She could get up there and say “Spam Spam Spam Spam” for 45 minutes and the Republicans and the pundits would still praise her to the skies as the savior of the Republican party.

    It’s not about the speech, it’s about how it’s spun. And you’d better believe the Republicans are going to be on the ball about that.”

    For tonight, sure. But without a real hook to keep people talking about it after today, we’re back to the scandals.

  35. 35.

    LiberalTarian

    Remember how the Schiavo affair was the straw that broke the camel’s back for John Cole? Well, paraphrasing, I wasn’t reading BJ much then, that I’ve heard it basically popped his head off. Anyway, the base that Palin will excite is going to go all Save-Terri-Schiavo on national TV, but this time the apple of their glazed-over eyes will be Sarah Palin.

    I foresee a lot of independents running for the hills to get away from them. It’ll be interesting to see what happens.

  38. 38.

    TheFountainHead

    Did Romney just call the Supreme Court—7 of 9 appointees by Republicans—a liberal court?

    Did he just say Washington, with an eight-year Republican administration and six of the last eight years Republican House and Senate, is liberal?

    I think my head just exploded.

    Yes. Yes. Mine too.

  39. 39.

    hamletta

    Haha, they’re playing “September” by Earth Wind & Fire. Cue sternly worded letter from Maurice White’s attorneys in 3…2…1….

  40. 40.

    PC

    Old white conservatives are so cute when they try to dance to EWF.

    I’m not sure cute is the word I would use. Didn’t the Dems actually have EWF playing at their convention?

  41. 41.

    Ted

    You’d think they’d bus in the rare and precious black Republicans, just to get SOME kind of color in the convention hall. I had forgotten how much of a sea of unbroken white it would look like.

  42. 42.

    PC

    You’d think they’d bus in the rare and precious black Republicans, just to get SOME kind of color in the convention hall. I had forgotten how much of a sea of unbroken white it would look like.

    There is one. MSNBC has shown her a half dozen times.

  44. 44.

    Dan

    McCain likes to drag out his mom, but the fact is his dad died at 70. And he is now 72, so … President Palin?

  45. 45.

    jake

    Depressing? Tim, this is a demonstration of the beauty of the free market. The GOP pushed a crap product so long and so hard that it can’t find enough buyers to keep the company afloat. Anyone competent enough to fix their problems has been ‘fired’ or quit in disgust. They could call in help, re-work their business plan and eventually get them back on sound footing. But for now they went with Door Number 2: Try another quick fix that makes exacerbates all the problems caused by all the other quick fixes.

    Don’t worry. Something will come along to fill the vacuum.

  46. 46.

    dr. bloor

    So let’s review: John McCain spent five years in a POW camp in a worthless spit of land in SE Asia so I could sit at a school desk?

  47. 47.

    TR

    Romney takes it to the liberal elites of the East Coast, and then Huckabee talks sinisterly about Obama bringing back suspect ideas from Europe.

    The Republican Party: Building a Bridge to the 1950s

  49. 49.

    PeterJ

    Dan, McCain’s paternal grandfather died at 61.
    Also both he and McCain’s father died suddenly.

    On his mother’s side, they live longer.

  50. 50.

    dr. bloor

    The GOP pushed a crap product so long and so hard that it can’t find enough buyers to keep the company afloat.

    Uh-oh. Looks like a major political party is in for steak knives this November.

  54. 54.

    plus C

    The AIP issue might not play so well, since neither of the Palins were caught saying “whitey” on video.

  55. 55.

    Chum

    On the whole the only imaginable reason why Palin would make a good pick is if every other possibility was worse.

    The others hadn’t watched every episode of The West Wing.

  57. 57.

    Narcissus

    They oughta show this video to every highschool lothario who won’t use a condom. As a cautionary tale.

  59. 59.

    Stuck in the Fun House

    Gregory just said, what he was getting from the Goopers was they were going to try and turn Sarah Palin into an Icon in the mold of Ronald Reagan. Is this a great country or what?

  60. 60.

    Tim F.

    BTW, I don’t really want to publicize it in a post of its own, but something just came up that knocked my socks off. My dad is a neocon Liebercrat who emphatically sided with Bush after paleocons and most lifelong Republicans long since given up on the President. With no prompting from me, he just said that McCain’s decision to choose Palin had put him on the fence. If he can’t stomach McCain anymore then the Palin effect is going to be huge. Palin needs to cure cancer tonight or you can stick a fork in the straight talk express.

  61. 61.

    PC

    The way they’re all talking about Palin, you’d think that she was the Presidential nominee.

    The way they are talking in general, you’d think they haven’t been in charge for the last eight years.

  62. 62.

    zzyzx

    This was mentioned in the GOS open thread. The Republicans have been in power for 8 years. How come they aren’t running on any accomplishments?

  64. 64.

    The Moar You Know

    The way they’re all talking about Palin, you’d think that she was the Presidential nominee.

    Given McCain’s age, America needs to be looking at her as exactly that.

  67. 67.

    Equal Opportunity Cynic


    Depressing? Tim, this is a demonstration of the beauty of the free market.

    No.

    Like in many other industries, the barriers to entry for new vendors (in this case, winning first-past-the-post elections or at least convincing voters to overcome the “wasted vote” problem) are unrealistically high. Therefore the two entrenched vendors start out with such a huge advantage that they can peddle crap and still default to #2 in market share.

    If the GOP had to compete in a really free market, with dozens of competitors, they’d be the Christian Right Party with a stable 10% or so of the electorate.

  68. 68.

    PC

    Not like those tough decisions Giuliani had to make. Should I put my emergency command center within shagging distance of the mayor’s office or not?

  69. 69.

    Dreggas

    Thank the gods Ghost Hunters is back on tonight. Watching Giuliani make me hate him even more than I did when I was a New Yorker. Of course the stale attacks are just sad

  71. 71.

    Path

    Did Giuliani just drive away all the independent voters from McCain or is that just wishful thinking?

  72. 72.

    John S.

    BTW, I don’t really want to publicize it in a post of its own, but something just came up that knocked my socks off.

    My father-in-law sounds identical to your father, Tim.

    He said as much to me the other day, and frankly was rather upset that McCain put his back to the wall with Palin and might make him vote for the schfartza.

  73. 73.

    NonWonderDog

    Well, go through Obama’s resume point-by-point and leave out nine tenths of it, mock the very idea of helping people, and then show a remarkable ignorance for the concept of constitutional majority. Rudy really is a slimy little motherfucker, isn’t he?

  74. 74.

    TR

    How many times has John McCain been absent for votes this year?

    Excellent point. Present is better than AWOL.

    I didn’t think anyone could top the asshole performance by Romney, but Rudy sure managed to do it.

  75. 75.

    PC

    You know who else was a lawyer from Illinois that served in the state house then in the federal government for a few years before coming president?

    That’s right. Hitler.

  76. 76.

    Stuck in the Fun House

    Has anyone seen Rudy’s neck?

    Oh that’s what happens sometimes with extreme embarrassment. It’s the turtle neck syndrome where one has the overwhelming urge to pull ones heads inside ones shell. See it a lot these days with wingnuts.

  78. 78.

    Tim F.

    He said as much to me the other day, and frankly was rather upset that McCain put his back to the wall with Palin and might make him vote for the schfartza.

    It is spooky that that is almost exactly how my dad put it.

  79. 79.

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford

    TR Says:

    …I didn’t think anyone could top the asshole performance by Romney, but Rudy sure managed to do it.

    September 3rd, 2008 at 9:13 pm

    Had enough of Giuliani’s toothy maniacal grin yet?

  80. 80.

    dr. bloor

    Thank the gods Ghost Hunters is back on tonight. Watching Giuliani make me hate him even more than I did when I was a New Yorker. Of course the stale attacks are just sad

    And it goes without saying that Guiliani is more physically unappealing than the auras of decomposing corpses on GH.

  81. 81.

    gratefulcub

    Drill Baby Drill!!!

    That is a tagline they are pushing. Am I missing something? Is that going to help them?

  82. 82.

    John S.

    It is spooky that that is almost exactly how my dad put it.

    Neocon Jewish men in their sixties are a fascinating breed, aren’t they?

  83. 83.

    gil mann

    I never really watched Romney so I never realized how funny it is that Colbert uses clips of Guy Smiley as footage of him. What a dweeb.

    Huckabee, though, that dude was born for the TV to love. Even when he speaks extemporaneously he always nails it—he’s like a good character actor playing a fictionalized version of himself.

    The Enforcer is playing opposite Rudy. I chuckled at first but then the parallels started piling up and now I’m kind of freaked out.

  84. 84.

    gratefulcub

    Who decided to put Rudy on to remind everyone about 9/11 before they put Palin on stage? Is that smart?

  90. 90.

    Desmond

    Giuliani is absolutely despicable. I can’t believe these apes think “community organizer” is a laugh line…wait, yes I can. These are Republicans.

  91. 91.

    PC

    I’m glad Rudy is nailing Dr. Laura to the wall about questioning Palin about how much time she can spend with her family.

  92. 92.

    zzyzx

    We’re not questioning that Rudy. YOU GUYS are. Dr. Laura is, not us. We’re questioning her abilities.

    I do have to say that if Rudy were the VP, we might be in trouble.

  93. 93.

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford

    I can’t believe I just sat through Romney, Huckabee and Giuliani just to hear what this woman has to say.

  94. 94.

    Rosali

    Ok, Rudy. I’ll say it. Maybe you too should have spent more time with your family when you were mayor.

  97. 97.

    TR

    I can’t believe these apes think “community organizer” is a laugh line…

    My wife’s mouth is still aghast at that.

  98. 98.

    gopher2b

    Nice subtle backdrop for Rudy. I wonder why they chose that?

    At least there was no smoke.

    Wow, Olberman just said they had to cancel the video of Palin because the Rudy’s speech went too long.

    Un-fuckin-believable. They can’t even run a god-damn convention.

  99. 99.

    dr. bloor

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford Says:

    I can’t believe I just sat through Romney, Huckabee and Giuliani just to hear what this woman has to say was told to say by McInsane’s goon squad.

    Fixt.

  100. 100.

    Calouste

    For tonight, sure. But without a real hook to keep people talking about it after today, we’re back to the scandals.

    We will be back to the scandals. The National Enquirer is hitting the shelves tomorrow, and I guess they haven’t let everything that is in the paper edition go to the other press for free.

  101. 101.

    TR

    It’s nice seeing the Republicans replay all their greatest hits.

    Spiro Agnew from ’68, Buchanan from ’92 … oooh, Quayle ’88!

  102. 102.

    gopher2b

    Silly media. They’ve had the wrong daughter on the tube all night. The other one is preggo.

    BTW, the Palins (family) look completely and totally overwhelmed by this.

  103. 103.

    D. Mason

    Did Rudy seriously just get through a speech without mentioning 9/11 or being the mayor of New York? WTF…

  104. 104.

    tBone

    Has anyone seen Rudy’s neck?

    Oh that’s what happens sometimes with extreme embarrassment. It’s the turtle neck syndrome where one has the overwhelming urge to pull ones heads inside ones shell.

    Simpler explanation: he’s a huge dickhead.

    I’ve been alternating tonight between watching the convention and walking around with my colicky 3-month-old. The experiences are surprisingly similar.

  105. 105.

    rococo

    Most Americans would regard two 17-year-old non-high-school graduates having a baby and getting married a tragedy even if they believe abortion shouldn’t be an option. To see these xtianist freaks celebrating (falsely!) something so sad and preventable is disheartening.

  107. 107.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    They overlooked the fact John McCain is 5’7″ and can run between Bin Laden’s legs, quickly turn around and bite him on the ass. They overlooked John Sidney McCain.

  109. 109.

    Jon H

    “God she sounds like a student reading her winning essay in a contest.”

    Well, at least she’s an improvement on Bush, who always sounds like a C-average 5th grader giving an oral report.

  110. 110.

    Davis X. Machina

    You know who else was a lawyer from Illinois that served in the state house then in the federal government for a few years before coming president?

    That’s right. Hitler.

    Shit, when did they put Hitler on the penny and five-spot?

    I thought we won that war.

    And it’s a bad likeness — no moustache.

  114. 114.

    Mary

    Shallow fashion note: good choice to leave her hair down instead of keeping that damn updo.

    (I caught a glimpse on my way downstairs for tea, but I’ll wait for the YouTube highlights later.)

  115. 115.

    gopher2b

    Who’s keeping count. There are at least two more Palin children, Scount and Flipper, who have not been exploited by the McCain campaign yet.

  116. 116.

    NonWonderDog

    Great spawn of Iggdrasil, this “there’s a time for politicking, and a time to put country first” pablum sounds like horseshit after 9u11iani’s fucknuttery.

  117. 117.

    TheFountainHead

    I wonder if she is going to shove someone into a wood chipper while she’s up there?

    Nominated for PotD.

  119. 119.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Did Rudy seriously just get through a speech without mentioning 9/11 or being the mayor of New York? WTF…

    Nope, he brought it up.

  120. 120.

    Narcissus

    The big-picture story of this is just so pathetic. I mean she got knocked up by this dude in high school and now she’s stuck with him and he’s a professional snow-machine racer and she got token-picked for the Vice President because McCain is a 70 year old angry child and now her daughter’s screwed up life is following the trajectory of her own on national television. Way to go. And oh yeah, she’s been on the PTA. That’s her qualification. She can’t evne choke it out without laughing.

  122. 122.

    dr. bloor

    Levi looks like a lizard trapped in a jar.

    Speech blows big time, btw. Shoulda saved all this for her appearance on “The View.”

  123. 123.

    gopher2b

    Damn, she has the Minnesota accent DOWN.

    I truly feel bad for this family. They are so in over their head right now.

  124. 124.

    Pooh

    They overlooked the fact John McCain is 5’7” and can run between Bin Laden’s legs, quickly turn around and bite him on the ass. They overlooked John Sidney McCain.

    This needs more love.

  126. 126.

    Rosali

    Watching PBS here. They just showed the youngest daughter lick her hand and use her spit to smooth out Trig’s hair.

  127. 127.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Who’s keeping count. There are at least two more Palin children, Scount and Flipper, who have not been exploited by the McCain campaign yet.

    Don’t leave out little Field and Precalc.

  129. 129.

    jcricket

    Did Romney just call the Supreme Court—7 of 9 appointees by Republicans—a liberal court?
    Did he just say Washington, with an eight-year Republican administration and six of the last eight years Republican House and Senate, is liberal?

    Doesn’t matter – none of it matters. Republicans play the victim card better than any of the supposed “victims” they rail against (welfare moms, feminists, etc).
    The reality is their party platform is 100% bunk – none of it works. It’s all crap. From supply side economics, no-bid contracts, “free market” healthcare, abstinence eduction, “100% war all the time”, market-led-environmental regulations, etc. It’s all been proven false, in an empirical manner, time and again.

    But when everything you do is going to turn into complete shit, but you still want to reap the benefits of winning, you just keep blaming the other side. Paint it as though no matter what happens, it was all someone else’s fault. Couple this victim complex with their amazing ability to “project” (psychological projection) and you will understand the modern-day GOP.

    As PJ O’Rourke (no lover of Democrats) said, Republicans are the party that campaign on the premise that government is incompetent, and then get elected and prove it.

  130. 130.

    Jon H

    They overlooked the fact John McCain is 5’7” and can run between Bin Laden’s legs, quickly turn around and bite him on the ass. They overlooked John Sidney McCain.

    Bah, if that worked, he’d have done it to Obama.

  132. 132.

    Eric

    Wow, I thought she’d do better. The speech text is okay, but her delivery is suck as hell.

    And what’s with the baby hot potato…are they just passing him around the whole audience?

  133. 133.

    gopher2b

    OMG Scout just licked Trig’s head!!!

    Someone please tell Mom she is on national television. This is horrible.

  134. 134.

    Chum

    I can’t believe these apes think “community organizer” is a laugh line…

    My wife’s mouth is still aghast at that.

    Or Romney’s kine about the liberals ‘will just increase Medicaide’.

  136. 136.

    Chum

    I can’t believe these apes think “community organizer” is a laugh line…

    My wife’s mouth is still aghast at that.

    Or Romney’s kine about the liberals ‘will just increase Medicaide’.

  137. 137.

    jcricket

    Levi looks like a lizard trapped in a jar.

    As Josh Marshall mentioned, we “all” agree that kids are supposed to be off-limits, and yet here’s McCain, making the unwed daughter and reluctant husband-to-be the centerpiece of Palin’s introduction to the world. I do think I’m experiencing irony overload watching Republicans cheer an unwed teenage mother. I guess she’s white and suckles from the teat of the Republican federal welfare state, so it’s OK.

  142. 142.

    TR

    I can’t believe she just had the nerve to claim she said “thanks but no thanks” to the Bridge to Nowhere after it’s been proven that she actively campaigned on a promise to get it. Sweet Jesus.

  144. 144.

    Helena Handbag

    grateful cub sayeth: “Drill Baby Drill

    That is a tagline they are pushing. Am I missing something? Is that going to help them?”

    Geez, that’s what got Bristol in this predicament in the first place.

  145. 145.

    tomjones

    Isn’t belittling Obama’s experience as a community organizer sort of akin to belittling McCain’s experience as a jet plane crasher?

  146. 146.

    The Moar You Know

    Levi looks like a lizard trapped in a jar.

    Man, I feel bad for that poor fucking kid. Both of ’em, actually. It’ll be a miserable marriage (if it ever happens, which I doubt) and an even more miserable divorce. 17 is too damn young.

  147. 147.

    Stuck in the Fun House

    Levi looks like a lizard trapped in a jar.

    I look for him and Cindy to run off to Mexico together.

  148. 148.

    jcricket

    Neocon Jewish men in their sixties are a fascinating breed, aren’t they?

    Uh, yeah, since my dad (67, Jewish, pretty hawkish, voted Reagan twice) has become a rabid Obama fan after McCain nominated Palin. He was never gonna vote McCain (8 years of Bush were enough was his line), but the nomination of an unqualified hack has sent him over the edge (something fairly difficult to do with my dad).

    There’s no doubt Obama’s gonna win this. The only question is do we somehow end up with a big win (60% popular vote)?

  149. 149.

    gopher2b

    Data point: My mother who is a nurse, late 50’s, would identify herself as Independent/Republican but who’s policies really align themselves with Dems thinks she’s doing a good job.

  150. 150.

    TR

    And now she’s lying that Obama never passed any major legislation in the U.S. Senate or State Senate.

    I expect her to claim he’s actually a Hispanic woman. It’d be about as true.

  151. 151.

    dr. bloor

    wasabi gasp Says:

    Palin kinda reminds me of a right wing Rosanna Barr.

    Or possibly Roseanne Roseannadana.

  163. 163.

    damemusic

    I’m sorry, but if this is the best that the GOP can do, this election is in the bag. You can tell she’s phoning this in. And her voice is annoying the hell out of me.

  165. 165.

    TR

    This is drifting into Pat Buchanan ‘92 territory. The crowd has an ugly, ugly vibe.

    Yep. Apparently mockery, hatred and asshole comments are all they have left.

  167. 167.

    PC

    And her voice is annoying the hell out of me.

    At least it isn’t Fred Thompson. His speech put my hyperactive puppy to sleep.

  169. 169.

    RareSanity

    GOP: We have more POWs than you…put that in your pipe and smoke it!

    BTW, did you know John McCain was a POW?

  170. 170.

    montysano

    The crowd has an ugly, ugly vibe.

    It’s a good thing they dragged the Code Pink protestor out of the hall; they’d rip her to shreds……… literally.

  171. 171.

    montysano

    The crowd has an ugly, ugly vibe.

    It’s a good thing they dragged the Code Pink protestor out of the hall; they’d rip her to shreds……… literally.

  173. 173.

    gopher2b

    She’s incredibly (I guess not “incredibly”) raw but she isn’t doing that poorly for being plucked out of Alaska less than a week ago.

    She will be a force in GOP politics from here on out.

  179. 179.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Did I miss the part where she talked about being 6 years old when John McCain was a POW? Because apparently John McCain was a POW.

  180. 180.

    Chum

    Apparently mockery, hatred and asshole comments are all they have left.

    Hey, they’re authentic don’t you know?

    I never get how ppl are are so willing to display their small mindedness.

  181. 181.

    Jim

    I seriously will be suicidal if we have Cindy McCain as first lady for the next four years. God, I’ve come to loath that woman.

  184. 184.

    Soylent Green

    Who’s keeping count. There are at least two more Palin children, Scount and Flipper, who have not been exploited by the McCain campaign yet.

    Don’t leave out little Field and Precalc.

    Don’t you watch Colbert? Their names are Snackchip and Toejam.

  186. 186.

    Will Hunting

    This comment thread is on absolute fire tonight. I would have to repost pretty much all of it to get all the high notes in. Great work tonight.

  188. 188.

    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford

    If McCain-Palin wins how long before the smash reality hit, Pimp My Veep, airs on FOX?

  189. 189.

    dorkboy

    I can’t believe she used the “thanks, but no thanks” line regarding the so-called bridge to nowhere. Didn’t they get the memo…

    psst, guys, it’s a lie and everyone knows it.

  190. 190.

    gopher2b

    Couldn’t someone have told Levi to spit out his gum. He looked like a cow.

    This is total anarchy.

  192. 192.

    AkaDad

    After this speech, if anyone says that we have to take it easy on Palin, they can politely go fuck themselves.

  193. 193.

    PC

    Major fuck up. They should have had John McCain hold the baby.

    John McCain didn’t have any babies to hold for 5.5 years while he was a POW.

  194. 194.

    L. Ron Obama

    Stewart also on fire. The only show that contrasts these circus freaks’ past and present statements. Immensely satisfying.

    Well, it took so long to post this that L. Ron Obama can now report that Colbert is en fuego tambien.

  195. 195.

    tBone

    Wow. Could the big finish where McCain came out have been any more awkward? Palin acted like she wanted to get away from him before he grabbed her ass, and he doddered around like an embarrassing elderly relative at a family reunion.

    I bet the baby daddy was wishing there was a real vice president around to shoot him in the face.

  196. 196.

    Stimpy

    What a bunch of nasty, condescending, mean spirited ass-clowns. What is wrong with these people? Of course, by all rights Obama should be at 60% after this display.

    How much you want to bet that McCain gets a positive bounce because of this? Never underestimate the American electorate!

  197. 197.

    Original Lee

    Slightly OT, but I’m still honked off about the Friday presser where McCain introduced Palin as his running mate. Not for the usual reasons, or at least not mostly for the usual reasons. No, I’m honked off because the Goopers thought it was a good idea to have Boy Scouts in uniform as part of the backdrop for the podium. My brother is an Eagle Scout, and he was sitting there with his mouth agape because Boy Scouts are NEVER supposed to show up at partisan political events in uniform. Plus, my nephew is in a Boy Scout troop that normally helps at the polls near the local nursing home/assisted living complex, and yesterday when my brother put in the normal request for permission to help, he was told that they can’t help any more because they are not nonpartisan. (So it wasn’t just the Original wingnuts that noticed.) Grrrr. I hope National chews on the butts of those four idiots in Ohio and feeds the pieces to a woodchipper. Or maybe to a polar bear.

    The good news is, my brother and my sister-in-law are now voting Obama because of this. Plus, I just got off the phone with my mom, who is now voting Obama because Palin is batshit crazy. “Flying from Texas to Alaska while you’re in labor isn’t tough, it’s NUTS!” (verbatim) “You notice how she’s never carrying the baby or even really touching her kids? What’s up with that?” (also verbatim) Mom is in her 70s and has voted Republican all her life, but she is splitting her ticket this time.

  198. 198.

    jenniebee

    She reminds me so much of the dentist’s wife in Waiting for Guffman

    So somebody finally explained why attacks on her are sexist. Apparently, somebody refered to her as a “cheerleader” – which is just so obviously wrong, listening to her talk about how important it is for the president to believe in America and success and victory… it’s clearly McCain who’s running for Cheerleader in Chief.

    Then there’s that people are questioning whether somebody with a special needs newborn is really at a place in her life where becoming Vice President is a good idea. Which is so totally legitimately sexist from a Republican’s point of view. Nobody would ask whether a man with a family member who needed extensive medical attention and care should be taking on one of the hardest, most demanding jobs in the world. I mean, sure, Edwards’ decision to stay in the race when his wife was diagnosed received the exact same kind of scrutiny, but they think he’s a girl too.

  200. 200.

    Svensker

    She’s pretty good — I wouldn’t underestimate her. But the media stories will keep a comin’…

    Does John Boehner have a speech impediment or was he trying to wrap his gums around an extra-large chunk of gruel? (Not to mention how disappointed I am that his name is pronounced “Bay-ner” and not “Boh-ner”.)

  201. 201.

    Stuck in the Fun House

    wasabi gasp Says:

    Man, I would love to be a fly on Hillary’s wall right now. Meow!

    You know wasabi, I was just thinking along those lines. Maybe Palin will light a fire under Hillary and she goes full bore for Obama. Talk about a world class catfight. Hillary would chew her up and spit her out.

  203. 203.

    gopher2b

    Major fuck up. They should have had John McCain hold the baby.

    I guess there’s still time.

    He’s supposed to hold the baby through the entire speech tomorrow night.

  205. 205.

    tBone

    She really has you guys nervous doesn’t she??

    Yes, yes she does. I enjoy popcorn, and I’m not going to be able to afford it if she stays on the ticket.

  206. 206.

    b. hussein canuckistani

    Saw 20 seconds of the RNC and overfilled my quota of old white guys in cowboy hats. So let us all know if anything interesting actually happens.

  207. 207.

    DougJ

    She really has you guys nervous doesn’t she??

    I was nervous before the speech.

    I don’t think they reworked it enough. The part about her family and so on was good, but the sarcasm was over the top.

    They had a chance tonight with her and they blew it. The speech could have been a lot better.

  208. 208.

    AkaDad

    So let us all know if anything interesting actually happens.

    I did learn one thing tonight. John McCain was a POW.

  210. 210.

    hamletta

    With that “Thanks, but no thanks” line, she defiles the memory of the goddess Delores Gray.

    I wish that vlog girl had the resources to reproduce that little number. I’m seein’ that last line as “…’cause I’ve-got-a-guy-that’s-Wilford-Brimley-and-Andy-Rooney combiii-iined!/Thanks a lot, but no! No tha-a-a-a-aanks.'”

  211. 211.

    b. hussein canuckistani

    I did learn one thing tonight. John McCain was a POW.

    Bullshit. If that were true, someone somewhere would have mentioned it before now.

  212. 212.

    wasabi gasp

    Palin seems like a love her or hate her candidate. The problem with that is if, after tonight, you’re not now loving her, prolonged exposure will just make it easier to hate her.

  213. 213.

    Equal Opportunity Cynic

    montysano:


    It’s a good thing they dragged the Code Pink protestor out of the hall; they’d rip her to shreds……… literally.

    Naah, they’re Republicans. They don’t like to actually do the fighting, just to cheer others on as they send them out to fight.

    They’d send out a page of talking points to the 101st Chairborne and then hire working class security thugs to do their dirty work, like always.

    BTW, just curious from your user name, are you from North Alabama too?

  214. 214.

    LiberalTarian

    dr. bloor Says:

    wasabi gasp Says:

    Palin kinda reminds me of a right wing Rosanna Barr.

    Or possibly Roseanne Roseannadana.

    Or, how about Rosanne Barr-barella?

    Rosanne Barr-Barr-Barr-Barr-Barr-Barr-ino?

  215. 215.

    zoe from pittsburgh

    I think she seemed snide, snotty, sarcastic, arrogant and pretty unlikable. I was sort of surprised that for an introductory speech they didn’t try to make her more likable, just do a great bio speech and give her a chance for people to really admire and respect her. It would have made her a really great weapon. Their mistake was overlooking the fact that her audience wasn’t just the Republican true believers in that room, it was her introduction to the world-at-large.

  216. 216.

    zoe from pittsburgh

    Also, did any of you know that John McCain was a P.O.W.? Or that Sarah Palin has kids that are “off limits” except when she parades them around to remind everyone that she’s just a “hockey mom.”

    It’s really all they got– a POW and a woman VP– oh, that and blatantly and shamelessly lying about their own records as well as Obama’s. Lovely. Although I’ve come to expect nothing less from the “Christian” fundamentalists that are clearly still in charge of the Republican party.

  217. 217.

    LiberalTarian

    So, she said the difference between hockey moms and pitbulls is lipstick. And, she’s really concentrated on denigrating Obama/Biden. So, guess if she can dish it out, she sure as hell better be able to take it, eh?

    Bwahahaha. It’ll be a political slugfest!!

    And she better not whine about it, either. :D

  218. 218.

    wasabi gasp

    I found the most amusing thing of the night to be displaying the baby daddy. Aside from being some absurd symbol of family values, does the guy who knocked up Bristol realize he was just used like a piece of meat?

  219. 219.

    Beej

    The talking heads are lauding her-even on MSNBC. Not Olbermann so much, but Mathews thinks she was great. Howard Fineman says she shored up the base, which is what McCain needed her to do. That much is probably true, but I think McCain can kiss most independents goodbye.

  220. 220.

    Mel V

    Wasabi gasp, oh he realizes it all right.

    So what do you think John McCain said to Levi when he met him earlier today and placed a grandfatherly hand on Levi’s shoulder? Inquiring minds (well, this one) want to know.

  221. 221.

    zoe from pittsburgh

    The talking heads were absolutely GLOWING about Obama last week– even Buchanan was babbling about how magnificent he was. By comparison they really didn’t seem especially impressed, just sort of polite, and all of them said it was a lot of “red meat.”

  223. 223.

    Brachiator

    gopher2b Says:

    She’s incredibly (I guess not “incredibly”) raw but she isn’t doing that poorly for being plucked out of Alaska less than a week ago.

    You underestimate her, as did some of the ABC pundits. She was a sports anchor. It may have been for a small TV station, but she is used to speaking on camera, and used to teleprompters and all the other media tricks. And just as Hawaii is not a faraway exotic land, Alaska is not a foreign country untouched by civilization.

    Her speech was crafted by White House staffers, but this was not her first trip to the rodeo. She even handled to “foreign policy” bits well and only sounded like Miss South Carolina a couple of times. And such.

    She will be a force in GOP politics from here on out.

    This is a frightening possibility. The new culture wars are on. If the stories about her vindictive firing of enemies is fully verified, Palin’s continued rise within the GOP would see a potential victory of rigidly intolerant Christianists.

    Imagine Ann Coulter with real political power.

  225. 225.

    Brachiator

    PC Says:

    Imagine Ann Coulter with real political power.

    Coulter doesn’t eat kill her own dog food. Palin does.

    Fixed

  226. 226.

    zzyzx

    Hey I’ll admit I’m terrified of her. An unqualified book banner who makes all members of the government kowtow to her and thinks a raped 14 year old should be forced to carry the pregnancy to term trying to win office by reading a speech that attack people who worked hard for little pay to help the less fortunate. Yes, I’m terrified this will work and I’m terrified she will have to run the country.

  227. 227.

    PeterJ

    (Not to mention how disappointed I am that his name is pronounced “Bay-ner” and not “Boh-ner”.)

    I predict that after Boehner is finished in the congress he’ll end up doing what Dole is doing, selling those kind of pills I can mention here since then my comment would end up in comment limbo, never to be seen again.

    “No, my name is actually pronounced Bay-ner, but if you want the other one, then this is the pill you should take.”

    He should probably start his own brand. Boehner pills.

  228. 228.

    chopper

    i love it. ‘community organizer’ is worthless, but ‘PTA membership’ makes a solid resume.

  229. 229.

    Greg

    “PC Says:

    You know who else was a lawyer from Illinois that served in the state house then in the federal government for a few years before coming president?

    That’s right. Hitler.”
    PC wins an internets. Go PC!

    B. Hussein Canuckistani for a close second:

    I did learn one thing tonight. John McCain was a POW.

    Bullshit. If that were true, someone somewhere would have mentioned it before now.

    She delivered the speech well, but it was a wasted opportunity. She already had the base just by being picked–she needed to go after independents. She didn’t–in fact, the more I hear, the more it sounds like she actively turned them off. Also, Biden can totally take the gloves off now.

Comments are closed.

Trackbacks

  1. […] of Palin’s accomplishments so far, by Tim over on Balloon Juice. Among other accomplishments: So far she has falsely claimed to have won a Miss Congeniality prize at a beauty pageant, she denied any contact with the anti-American fringe Alaska Independence Party (multiple sources confirm that she attended their convention in 1994, she sent a video address this year and her husband was a longtime registered member), she claimed that she opposed the Bridge to Nowhere when her gubernatorial campaign was predicated on supporting it. […]