Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

The republican caucus is already covering themselves with something, and it’s not glory.

Let’s finish the job.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

I’d try pessimism, but it probably wouldn’t work.

Imperialist aggressors must be defeated, or the whole world loses.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.

In my day, never was longer.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

White supremacy is terrorism.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

Let’s not be the monsters we hate.

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

Wow, I can’t imagine what it was like to comment in morse code.

I like you, you’re my kind of trouble.

After roe, women are no longer free.

Nothing worth doing is easy.

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73Comments

  1. 1.

    demkat620

    Pimlico’s about 2 hours south of me. It is a perfect day here. About 75 partly sunny. Great day for what could be a really good race.

    Man I wish I was at Pimlico.

  2. 2.

    Incertus

    I’m trying to figure out why ESPN is still showing the 2008 World Series of Poker on an endless loop. Is there nothing else in the world of sports worth paying to air right now?

  3. 3.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Oh my God — Rachel Alexandra is running in the Preakness, too? This should be good!

    Too bad Calvin can’t be riding her.

    CORRECTION: apparently he’s dumped the Bird for her. Wow.

  5. 5.

    vacuumslayer

    Does anyone know about fiddleheads? I bought some on a whim shopping day and I wanna make a salad with them tonight. Suggestions?

    Failing that, anything cool I could do with broccolini? I try to work new–for me–foods into my repetoire…and sometimes I need a little help. Serving with burgers so it’s got to be something light.

  7. 7.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    FUCK! They’re playing “Anything You Can Do”. Not only is that a shitty song, it’s bad luck. It was played over and over again for Ruffian’s match race against Foolish Pleasure, and we all know how horribly that turned out.

    (Another awful parallel: the same jockey used to ride both horses, but he chose the filly in the match race.)

  10. 10.

    vacuumslayer

    @demkat620:

    He was perfect. Actually, I thought all the casting was just mind-blowingly good. I’m not a Trekkie, but I can’t imagine the fanboys and fangirls being disappointed.

  11. 11.

    Dave C

    We get hockey, we get horse-racing. But no NBA playoffs open threads? Why the lack of basketball love?

  12. 12.

    Elderta

    I don’t know why I’m so excited by this. I was a bit traumatized by the horse accidents at these big races in the last few years, but I really want this girl to kick those boys’ butts! Alas, I am in the middle of writing a paper and can’t watch live. Sigh…

  13. 13.

    gwangung

    He was perfect. Actually, I thought all the casting was just mind-blowingly good. I’m not a Trekkie, but I can’t imagine the fanboys and fangirls being disappointed.

    We’re not.

    The only problems are in some of the plotpoints (and I think you can guess which ones they are); casting, acting and the Vulcan themes are pretty much pitch perfect to the majority of the fan base.

  14. 14.

    smiley

    @vacuumslayer: Sure, put them in a clay pot with potting soil and some MiracleGro, water, wait a month or so. Then sell them to the nearest fern bar.

    BTW, FLOTUS commencement speech just started on CNN.

  15. 15.

    demkat620

    @gwangung: The only critique I had, the only one, (and it was minor) was the whole purpose of telling the fans, forget everything you thought you knew.

  16. 16.

    Incertus

    @vacuumslayer: A couple of my fanboy/girl friends have been, but they’re being ridiculous. They’re upset over the alternate timeline thing, as though that’s never been done in the history of Star Trek. I want to slap them.

  17. 17.

    vacuumslayer

    @gwangung:

    Plot points? Well, speaking for myself and myself only, I’m always thrown by time travel storylines. They always confuse the hell out of me. Always. Not proud of this, but it’s true. Was that the issue?

    Glad to hear you Trekkies liked it. I was happy for you all today. It was a terrific, enjoyable flick.

  18. 18.

    Nicole

    John, you are my favorite person of the day. Thank you for the Preakness thread!

    Previously on “As the Racetrack Turns”

    Superfilly, Rachel Alexandra, trashes the Kentucky Oaks field. Owner says women shouldn’t vote fillies shouldn’t run against colts because the Triple Crown is a showcase for future stallions. Calvin Borel rides her.

    Calvin Borel gives one of the best rides in Derby history and wins with Mine That Bird, a gelding. So much for future stallions. Somewhere, Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B Anthony smile.

    Rachel Alexandra is sold to Jess Jackson, who has a weird obsession with his horse Curlin and wants to buy him lots of hot girlfriends. He also sells kinda lame wine, but that’s not germane to this.

    Jess Jackson says RA is going in the Preakness and will pay the $100,000 supplement fee to nominate her. Somewhere, Elizabeth Cady Stanton high fives Susan B Anthony. Jess Jackson gets very excited at the thought of breeding a Preakness winner to a Preakness winner.

    Mine That Bird’s owner and Ahmet Zayed, owner of the 2nd place finisher, Pioneerof The Nile, allegedly conspire to keep RA out by entering crappy horses that were nominated to the Triple Crown race back before anyone knew they sucked. Only 14 horses can run in the Preakness. RA may be out of luck.

    Calvin Borel exercises Mine That Bird.

    Marylou Whitney, who is entering Luv Guv, a horse obviously named for Eliot Spitzer as the racing industry hates him, says she will pull Luv Guv from the race if necessary so that RA can run. Somewhere, Stanton and Anthony make out.

    Allen and Zayed back down.

    Calvin Borel dumps Mine That Bird for Rachel Alexandra because he says she’s the best horse he’s ever been on. Mike Smith is named as MTB’s rider. Racing fans smack their foreheads.

    I, who consider Rags to Riches’ victory over Curlin in the Belmont one of the greatest sporting event I’ve ever seen, but also very much want a Triple Crown, am still afraid my Derby pick, Fresian Fire, will come back and ruin the fun.

    Jess Jackson gives creepy interview about how Curlin likes the ladies.

    And there you have it.

  20. 20.

    gwangung

    @Incertus:

    They’re upset over the alternate timeline thing, as though that’s never been done in the history of Star Trek. I want to slap them.

    Like THAT’S never been done before either. I remember the old days on Usenet on rec.arts.startrek…glorious flaming and bitter fanboy arguments on theory, continuity and characterization…

    I feel….young again.

  22. 22.

    Incertus

    @vacuumslayer: The thing that made me happiest of all in this movie was (spoiler alert) that they didn’t “fix” the time travel problem. I’d have thrown popcorn at the screen if they had.

  23. 23.

    gwangung

    @vacuumslayer: Nah, it was the Extremely Impossibly Large Coincidence (but not the Large Scale ones) and the Galaxy-sized Deus Ex Machina….(but the ones who like the film forgave ’em for them…)

  24. 24.

    freelancer

    Horseracing?

    Ugh. Never got it, and the media attention has always been completely absurd, IMHO. 2 hours of pregame, followed by 1 ninety second lap. Are you serious? This isn’t for real, where’s Ashton?

    Apollo 9 Astronaut Rusty Schweickart interviewed on Skeptic’s Guide. Haven’t listed to it yet.

  26. 26.

    vacuumslayer

    @Incertus:
    Was there a time travel problem? Because if there was one, I missed it. As soon as time travel enters a plot, I just think “Um, ok. I guess.” They totally confuse me. I’m a very bright woman, but I’ve always had problems following time travel stories. Except for maybe Back to the Future. Yeah, my geek badge is seriously tarnished when it comes to that sort of thing. Last time travel film I tried to watch was a Spanish film called “Timecrimes” and, yeah, I barely followed that too.

  29. 29.

    SGEW

    When my friend took me to see Star Trek, I told him, “Ok, but if there’s a god damned time travel plot hook, I’m going to hold it against you: you know how much I hate fucking time travel in movies.”

    Not too long after this, I’m groaning and elbowing him in the theater. Time travel! Oh, how I loathe it as a plot device.

    So yeah, I hold it against him. But the rest of the movie was certainly entertaining enough (and remarkably well made – srsly!) that the egregiously bad plot points (marooned on an ice planet! meet cute with the cameo guest! groan! retch!) and the one preposterously bad casting choice (Winona Ryder as Spock’s mother?!?) were easily bearable.

  30. 30.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    I had fiddleheads a few times when I was a kid — and they’re great! — because my sister-in-law was from New Brunswick, but I haven’t cooked them myself.

    However, there’s a good chance that Krista, if she drops by from her fiddling workshop, could tell you something.

  32. 32.

    freelancer

    Last time travel film I tried to watch was a Spanish film called “Timecrimes” and, yeah, I barely followed that too.

    Timecrimes being remade in the US, by David Cronenberg.

    BTW, if you had trouble with that, don’t go near Primer. I love time travel, but that movie is on the edge of my comprehension.

  33. 33.

    JenJen

    @Nicole: There you are!! Just got home from some errands and thought I’d see if you were over here. So… aren’t you just a little bit nervous about her? I am…

    Happy Preakness!!

    @John Cole: Nicole knows a lot more than I do, trust me!! I was kind of born unto it, this horse racing tradition (my family was more into the trotters & pacers end, but we had a few thoroughbreds). Growing up on a horse farm will do that to you, and my paternal grandfather would literally recite racing stats to us. It just never leaves your blood.

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: As a kid, it took me, like, months to get over Ruffian. I still have her Breyer Horse statue. :-(

  34. 34.

    SGEW

    I just had some fiddleheads as a salad topping the other day. Lightly sauteed in olive oil, with a little salt, then plopped down over the salad. Very simple, very nice.

    [edit: And as far as time travel in movies goes, only Gilliam can seem to make it work (see, e.g., Time Bandits and Twelve Monkeys).]

  35. 35.

    El Cid

    Okay, this news story is just too good to pass up.

    An Iranian electoral rival to Ahmadinejad has criticized A’s Holocaust denial by claiming — correctly of course — that it served Israel’s interests.

    That is a clever move, in part because it’s one of those political moves which is obvious but which requires some level of insight and guts to do the bluntly obvious.

    ******************************

    Election rival blasts Ahmadinejad’s Holocaust denial

    By The Associated Press | Ha’aretz

    A reformist challenger to Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has criticized the hard-liner’s denial of the Holocaust, saying it has served Israel’s interests and pushed the country deeper into international isolation, a newspaper reported Saturday.

    Moderate cleric Mahdi Karroubi is one of two reformist candidates hoping to unseat Ahmadinejad in the June 12 presidential election. The former parliament speaker has said he would pursue a foreign policy of detente with the West and wouldn’t mind meeting President Barack Obama if it would help Iran’s national interests.

    “Ahmadinejad offered the greatest service to Israel by raising the Holocaust issue because the whole world stood to support Israel, Karroubi was quoted as saying by Etemad-e-Melli newspaper,” which he controls…

    …The leading reformist candidate, Mir Hossein Mousavi, has similarly slammed Ahmadinejad for waging a fierce rhetorical battle with the international community, leaving Iran with few friends to help protect its interests.

    “Today, excluding a few friends we’ve had for a long time, we have no appropriate interaction with the international community and are subject to threats,” Mousavi was quoted as saying by Aftab-e-Yazd newspaper…

  36. 36.

    Nicole

    @JenJen: You too! I want a Triple Crown, especially with a gelding, since he’ll be around for awhile, but yay for the filly!

    Freelancer- I think the short length of races is one of the reasons I like it. Suits my attention span.

    Well, and horses are pretty.

  37. 37.

    Svensker

    All the local markets here have fiddleheads lately. We tried them once — just sauteed them in butter with some garlic. Not bad. Kinda asparagus-y.

  38. 38.

    vacuumslayer

    @SGEW:

    I just had some fiddleheads as a salad topping the other day. Lightly sauteed in olive oil, with a little salt, then plopped down over the salad. Very simple, very nice.

    Yes!!!!

    I think I’m going the salad route, ‘cuz it’s light. Just blanch ’em and serve ’em in a regular salad.

    Timecrimes being remade in the US, by David Cronenberg.

    Oh my. That’s sure to be trippy and creepy.

  39. 39.

    DougJ

    I had fiddleheads a few times when I was a kid—and they’re great!—because my sister-in-law was from New Brunswick, but I haven’t cooked them myself.

    I had some last week while visiting my parents in Boston — crispy chicken with fiddleheads and ramps. Very good.

  40. 40.

    freelancer

    Nicole:

    Everybody has their thing. And they don’t have to justify it.
    I can watch 9 uninterrupted innings of baseball. On TV. In July.
    Also, I’m hopelessly addicted to MST3K-alums Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett’s newer project Rifftrax.

  41. 41.

    JenJen

    @Nicole: I’m torn… I worry about Rachel getting knocked around out of the gate, but that’s more to do with the past than with the filly herself. Can’t help but root for her, but it is really just a high-profile race and won’t have much of an effect on her career.

    But ohh, how I want a Triple Crown more!! So, gotta say I’m pulling for the colt, too. Can’t imagine being disappointed in this race at any rate.

  42. 42.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Well, slap my ass and call me a feminazi (then pull back your bleeding stump), because I’m rooting for the filly. We’ve waited 31 years for another Triple Crown, so we can surely wait one more year.

    (I just can’t watch.)

  43. 43.

    Nicole

    @JenJen: She’s a big girl- I think the getting knocked around bit is an excuse given by owners and trainers that have deeper issues than just running a girl horse against a boy horse. I poke fun, but they are just horses. ;) Curlin bumped Rags to Riches plenty down the stretch of the Belmont and she gave back just as good as she got.

    But yeah, I’ve been waiting for a Triple Crown since I picked Sunny’s Halo to win the Derby in 1983 (the first Derby I remember). I’ve had my heart broken so many times at Belmont… Smarty was the worst, but Charismatic was tough, too. It was hard to be bummed about Big Brown, huh? Heh.

  44. 44.

    DougJ

    Why is Maryland, My Maryland sung to the tune of Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree?

  46. 46.

    JenJen

    @Nicole: Plus, I didn’t realize she drew such a shitty position (13, good luck with that). Takes the knocked-around thing out of the equation, but really diminishes her chances, no? (ETA: Ha, Big Brown. I know, right? ;-))

    Look out for Papa Clem, everyone.

    Wow, real original state song, Maryland. Can’t believe I wasn’t aware of that. :-)

  47. 47.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Plus, I’ll feel bad if my little Cajun Calvin hopped off an eventual Triple Crown winner. I love that guy.

  51. 51.

    JL

    Jen or Nicole, Can you tell anything by the way the horses are approaching the gate? Big Drama seemed confident and Rachel seemed nonchalant.

  52. 52.

    JenJen

    @Laura W: TWO PINTS IMMEDIATELY, please. When does Crunchy Tunchy (with tiny chocolate chewable-Malkins) come out?

    @JL: Ummm. :-) I’m liking PioneeroftheNile, too. There are some good colts in this race, and they all drew better than Rachel. It’s raining though, and Mine That Bird loves the slop! ETA: Track announcers are saying the track is still pretty fast, though. RAIN HARDER, dammit!

  53. 53.

    Nicole

    @JL: Yes- if they’re really nervous they can blow the race before they’re even in the gate. I watched Purge completely melt down before the Belmont. He ran last.

  54. 54.

    demkat620

    @JenJen: Yeah, I think I like Pioneer of the Nile too.

    I don’t think we’re going to have a Triple Crown Winner.

  61. 61.

    Nicole

    I’m sorry for Mine That Bird, but frankly, all the people on the racing blog I frequent can stuff it right now after trashing him all week. Up theirs; the gelding is the real deal.

    And yay for the filly!!!!!!!! I cannot wait for the Belmont; please, please, crazy Jess, please run her…

  64. 64.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    OK, that made me cry. Crossed fingers, crying out to the tv “Hold on! Hold on!” And she did.

    (And I just now uncrossed my fingers).

    She’s incredible, but I don’t think she has a Belmont in her. I think Mine that Bird would have beaten her in the Derby, and if Calvin had stayed with him today and run up the rail, he could have beaten her.

    But OTOH, she was in 13 and had to run pretty wide most of the way. So, who knows?

  66. 66.

    D-Chance.

    The filly wins… check this off due to the jockey change and track position. Mine That Bird had a wider trip, and those extra couple of jumps made the difference.

    Although Borel is now saying that Rachel didn’t run her best race, so this could make for an interesting Belmont.

  67. 67.

    JenJen

    @Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse: First horse to ever win the Preakness from 13. Her move out of the gate was what won her the race. Go, Calvin Borel!! Wow.

    ETA: Like D-Chance said, Calvin says it wasn’t her best race and that was clear to all of us who have been following her. But coming around the last turn, c’mon, you knew she had it. Belmont? BRING IT.

    ETA2: A horsey-friend just texted from Turfway in Kentucky… he hit the Preakness trifecta in OTB. Sweet!!

  68. 68.

    Nicole

    Comrade Mary- you may be right, but there is no way in holy hell any of the jockeys would have let him have that rail today. And she ran way wide most of the race. Reminded me of Storm Flag Flying in the Juvy Fillies a few years ago.

    Argh; I have to go see a friend’s play right now- I’ll be back later for analysis. John, thanks again for the thread for the Balloon Juice racing fans!

    Early request for a Breeder’s Cup Thread?

  69. 69.

    Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse

    Yeah, Nicole, you’re right. Mike Smith was just saying that no one would let him through the rail.

    I’d like to see her in the Belmont if she’s fit. It’s a bit of a shame that until she runs in handicaps, she’s going to get that 5 pound weight advantage just because she’s a girl. She’s bigger than Mine That Bird, too.

    Hmm: Musket Man was third. He’s a bit of a dark horse, having won 5 times out of 8 this year. He seemed to fade in the stretch, but if he does have the capacity for distance, I wonder if he could be the Belmont spoiler?

  70. 70.

    demkat620

    Mine that Bird is an incredible horse. He was dead last again and ran another amazing race.

  71. 71.

    Nicole

    Mary- good point about Musket Man. He is always right there at the end. Could shape up to be the best race of the three.

    Oh- I meant “faze” not “phase.” I think all the Star Trek got me confused. Or I’m just stoopid.

  73. 73.

    Nicole

    @JenJen: Likewise, JenJen! Let’s do it again in three weeks. Both Mine That Bird and Rachel’s connections say if they come out of the race well they’re Belmont bound.

    Oh- the play. It was five short pieces. My friends’ play was good, but one of the other ones was, I think, the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Wait. Second worst. No, third worst. But definitely top five.

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