These are the people standing in front of your local reproductive services clinic, assuming you’re lucky enough to live where reproductive services clinics haven’t been firebombed or otherwise destroyed by forced-birth domestic terrorists, shading from the harmless-if-clueless to the very, very dangerous.
Bingo Ladies Gone Bad: Probably 85% of the “regulars”, the ones who show up on the bus from God’s Love Evangelical Church of the Risen Spirit Incorporated or the whitest of the local white-bread outburbs every week. They’re the women (mostly women) shoving their homeschooled kids in front of the news camera as they shriek “Don’t kill your babies! Repent or you’ll burn in the eternal fire!” And most of them are exactly as sincere about their deeply held anti-abortion belief as the average male sports fan standing on the next street corner, yelling “Go Sox! Yankees suck!” for another anchorpod’s evening news segment. It’s an afternoon out of the house, a socially excusable way to spend some quality time bonding with their friends. And the ‘Choose Life’ ladies don’t get beer, but the sports fans don’t get bonus points towards their version of heaven.
These are also the people of the “Choice for Me, But Not for Thee” contingent who ensure that abortion rates are just as high in the Heartland(tm) as they are among us godless liberals. Every abortion services provider has stories about the “pro-life” protestor who shows up in the front room, looking to get rid of a little “medical problem” for themselves or their teenage daughter. But Jesus knows that *they* are good people who made a mistake, or were victims of an unfortunate accident! Not like all those sluts and parasites sitting in the waiting room with them — those people are just murderers! In other words, many of the Bingo Ladies are really members of the Church of the Hypocrites, just like the rest of us.
Next up: Hobbyists & Little Hitlers
geg6
Ha! This is my staff assistant. You know, the one who is on her fifth divorce, whose son won’t come home from college voluntarily, and who has endless plastic surgery. But nothing wrong with her!!! No! She’s saved, you see. Not like a godless slut like me who never gave birth, never married, and who has had 2 longterm relationships in 30 years. She rushed to mention this today and I just stared at her and walked into my office without a word. For the rest of the day. I wanted to punch her. Even more than usual.
Laura W
Forget it. Delete.
LD50
‘Vagina Outrage’ would make a splendid band name.
jenniebee
For the record, Red Sox fandom is how children in my family were taught delayment of gratification. For my generation it was a damned effective strategy.
I am so sick of these discussions about abortion that treat the woman getting the abortion as a non-entity. The only questions anybody seems to care about are “is the fetus a person” and “is abortion murder” and nothing I’ve seen here yet asks the question, “even if the fetus was a full human person citizen voter what have you, does it have a special right to turn a woman into a vessel for nine months?”
I’m so tired of this “abortion is murder” crap. If abortion is murder then forcing a woman to have her body occupied by a fetus against her will and without her consent is rape.
Fulcanelli
@geg6: Kansas is a death penalty state. Her new Hero’s not a happy camper, nor will he be in the future. Remember that look she had on her face as she told you the news, you’ll need it.
freelancer
Humble request, A front-pager seriously needs to look at and post Olbermann’s final segment tonight.
It was sobering, humble, and brilliant. Combined with the Sullivan segment, it nutshelled everything that has occurred in the last 48 hours, and at least one appropriate response to it, and other Eliminationist rhetoric.
gex
@jenniebee: Listen, if you don’t pay your rent, you get evicted. It is very important for government to enforce property rights.
JGabriel
Just a suggestion, but maybe that should be: Vauxtrage?
.
geg6
Fulcanelli: Thanks. You’re right. But she makes me nuts. She brought it up because she knew it would send me round the bend. The same as her playing Christian music at our reception desk or her often stated sorrow at my lack of faith. And since I am the only non-religious staffer who must share her and we all, in fact, reluctantly inherited her as she’s been there longer than even me, she gets away with it. All subtle, but she knows exactly what she’s up to.
Bad Horse's Filly
Yup, mine, too.
I am sick of being held hostage by these people. I saw a photo of a protest sign I thought said it all. Terrorist, Hypocrit, Murderer.
Robertdsc-iphone
I wonder where La Belle Palin fits in in the Field Guide.
beltane
I’ve always wanted to know why the various right-wing spokeswomen on TV are not in a perpetual state of pregnancy. Either they are not fulfilling their wifely duties (a sin), their husbands are engaging in extramarital sex with all kinds of men, women and/or animals (all kinds of sin there), they are barren (that would mean Jesus is angry at them), or they are using birth control methods of some kind (more sin, alas).
Any way you slice it, these women are surely bound for hell and should not be listened to by anyone.
Little Dreamer
@geg6:
geg, I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life, some eerily similar to what you allude to here, that does not mean I ever stood out in front of an abortion clinic and protested (no, actually, I was one who got harrassed).
Let’s not make generalizations about mistakes people have made and apply them to ideologies, please?
Zifnab
@beltane:
No. These women are given special “spokeswoman” dispensations. You’re not actually required to practice what you preach.
Dave C
@freelancer:
It was quite good, though I wished he had made an effort to debunk some of the statements from O’Reilly that aired in those clips.
Little Dreamer
@Robertdsc-iphone:
She falls under the militant mommy who forces her daughter to give birth because of her own ideological bent, and then bribes the daughter to leave the baby’s daddy by offering the new teenaged mom her first car.
asiangrrlMN
@geg6: :Wait a minute, where are you working? I would think this would fall under religious, um, shut-the-fuck-up law?
Anne Laurie, I like this series already. Woot!
Zifnab, see, Schaefly, Phyllis and Palin, Sarah as prime examples of this.
jenniebee
@Bad Horse’s Filly: but kids today, I tell ya, they just don’t understand quixotic passions.
Well, the Cubs fans still do. But being a Cubs fan is kind of like being a Red Sox fan without all the tantalizing close calls that get your hopes up and then teach you to deal with disappointment. Profound disappointment.
freelancer
@Dave C:
Yeah, the phrases I used when I wrote on it:
“Two Inches Up From Carnival Barking”
and
“When he’s humble and sobering; when Olbermann has the facts on his side, he’s worth all the bullshit.”
—
I don’t have cable anymore, but I’ve seen enough BillO, and read enough of his prose to know that he’s well accustomed with pompous, self-righteous, assassinate-y language.
Fulcanelli
@beltane:
I think their Husbands call it ‘puttin from the rough’…
Dave C
I don’t know if y’all have been reading Obsidian Wings today, but Hilzoy has been on fire.
geg6
Little Dreamer: I only point to her mistakes because of the hypocritical nature of the woman. She seems to have no problem pointing out what she considers my moral flaws: my eating and drinking habits (though I am thinner, exercise regularly, and have better health at age 50 than she at the same age), my lack of religion (though her brand of Xianity is unrecognizable compared to the recorded teachings of her savior), and my repugnant personal life in which I have had the sum total two SOs since age 20. I really don’t give a damn about other people’s lives but if they feel the need to pronounce upon my choices? Well, then let’s examine who has the better judgment in life, know what I mean?
Incertus
@jenniebee: Try being a fan of the Cubs and the New Orleans Saints sometime. It gets ugly.
I’ve often wondered how these forced-pregnancy advocates look at women who are pregnant and seeking an abortion–as a victim or as a crime scene? Because they’re obviously not willing to call the women criminals.
Little Dreamer
@geg6:
Okay, just making sure you know that others who made some similar choices/mistakes aren’t always that batshit crazy. ;)
Slaney Black
I worked a pro-life march back in my young wingnut years. (Sorry). That post describes 80%+ of the people there. Can’t wait for the next update…Certainly remember the Little Hitlers too. Hobbyists? That should be a good one.
My personal “favorite” is the Irish-voodoo Catholic priest. The one with all the miraculous trinkets and end-of-days talk that would make Jack van Impe blush. Normal routine goes about like this…
But, my good friend:
Me too. Damn anal-retentive Calvinist/Jansenist parenting… No wonder they call us “Massholes.”
gbear
I drove past the local Planned Parenthood clinic this evening to see if there was any sort of vigil or protest happening, but the only thing in front of the clinic was a satellite van for a local TV station. A guy was recently convicted of ramming a van into the front of the clinic. At the end of his trial, his mom was telling the judge that he should be lenient because the guy was only doing what the voice of god was telling him to do. These people are certifiably deranged but everyone cuts them slack because they’re ‘religious’.
I’m always tempted to walk thru the protesters and donate $1 to the clinic for each of them, then go out and announce what I’d done, but I doubt that the clinic is thrilled about strangers of any type coming into the building or making waves out front.
TenguPhule
This is an insult to the sincerity of male sports fans everywhere,
Little Dreamer
Hey lady, I got news for ya, there’s a designation for that in the DSM mental health manuals (several editions), people who hear voices are paranoid schizophrenic and need to be on some serious medications and be monitored. Get your son to a mental clinic pronto!
TenguPhule
For those who ‘repent’, they’re victims.
The rest are sluts who deserve to be punished for having more fun then them.
SATSQ.
geg6
asiangrrlMN: Believe it or not, I work as an administrator at a well-known public university. The problem is it is a very small campus of that university and to make a big deal out of this would not be good politics for my, hopefully, rapidly winding down career (ha! As if, after the 401k got the beat down). And it’s all so subtle; unless we’re alone, usually, she is rarely up front about it. It’s quite the conservative (with a little “c”) campus climate. Most here are mostly political progressives (not her though), but are also quite the small town religious mindset. I am considered quite the exotic because I am openly non-religious, openly uninterested in marriage or children, and known to do unusual things like drink alcohol, travel (sometimes even outside the US!), eat odd foods like sushi, and manage a household without a man unless I decide to stay at my SO’s.
Little Dreamer
@gbear:
Actually the clinic where I was in FL and got harrassed, I went out and confronted them and argued religion with them for a while (I had time, my appointment wasn’t for a while). I set a few of them straight on the fact that their Jesus wouldn’t know them.
That said, I’m sure they were back on the street corner the next week.
;)
Ivan Ivanovich Renko
@Incertus: Pfeh.
Come to Cleveland.
asiangrrlMN
@geg6: Ah, got it. Well, then carry on with your sly undercutting of her crap. By the way, you sound like me. I think I like you.
@gbear: Yeah. I read about that. He’s mentally ill. He needs help. He won’t get it. Better he be in jail than ramming clinics. By the way, the local NARAL is planning a candlelight vigil at Loring Park tomorrow night from 9 pm to 9:30 pm. Just FYI.
Jeff Berardi
So… they’re completely sincere?
In all seriousness, does it bother anyone else that politics, religion, and sports all seem to be just different forms of the same basic human behavior? Heard mentality. Our side is great because we are great; your side sucks because they suck. We will win because we will win. No thinking allowed. No questioning. No nuance. Every fact presented must be bent to fit into the predetermined framework of The Team. It seems to me that the wingnuttery in the world can be explained by this simple human tendency, either participating in it or exploiting it.
Personally, I don’t really have any religious or political affiliations. I am quite the Red Sox fan, but I allow myself that because it doesn’t typically involve anyone getting killed. I mean, it happens, but it’s quite rare.
gbear
@asiangrrlMN: Thanks for that info. I’ll try to make it. Look for a fat old guy with an green Itasca State Park baseball hat.
Calming Influence
Back of the envelope calculation:
Current US population: 304,000,000
Current US birth rate: 14.18 births/1,000 population (2008 est.)
Population of the US in thousands: 304,059,724/1000 =304,060
Number of births in the US per year: 304,060 x 14.18 = 4,311,567
Number of births in the US per day: 4,311,567/365 = 11,813
Human gestation period: ~38 weeks (266 days)
Number of US pregnancies on any given day: 265 x 11,813 = 3,130,445
Number of pregnancies in the US past the 20th week on any given day: 38/20 =1.9; 3,130,445/ 1.9 = 1,647,603
.
O.K., now I speculate: What percentage of pregnancies past 20 weeks (the low number for the definition of “late term”) might be dangerous to the mother? 1% seems way too high. 1/10th of 1%? still too high. How about 1/1,000th of 1%? That’s one out of every 100,000 pregnancies. That’s a really small number.
.
That would equal 1,647,603 x 0.00001 = 16.5 women at any given time experiencing a life-threatening late-term pregnancy in the US.
.
And the few doctors in the US still willing to save their lives? They risk being shot for it.
TenguPhule
And you’d be fucking wrong and low.
Now factor in things like fatal genetic defects, severe risk of infertility damage, horrific mutations and you begin to understand why the few places still doing the procedure are booked solid.
Calming Influence
@TenguPhule: @37
Yup. Scare most of them away, and then say that the ones who have the balls to stand up to these terrorists are performing so many late-term abortions, they must just love killing babies…
Anne Laurie
Right now she’s in Part Deux, which I’m saving for tomorrow afternoon/evening, because you guys deserve a respite and my blood pressure medication can only do so much.
If anyone’s got suggestions for types or specific public figures (I’m looking at you, Slaney, with theft in my heart) I would be most interested in your ideas.
asiangrrlMN
@gbear: If I go, I’m the fat Asian chick with hair to her ass and tats. I don’t think you’d be able to miss me. Plus, I’ll most likely be wearing black as I wear black quite a bit. Wait, you are Asian, too, right? That’ll make it much easier.
@Calming Influence: Rachel had a great segment on how it’s nearly impossible for women to get abortions in certain counties in the US. North Dakota and South Dakota each only have one doctor who performs them (as does Mississippi). This is the real goal of the anti-abortionists–to make it so hard to obtain abortions, that it doesn’t matter if they are technically legal.
vishnu schizt
Good god Anne Laurie I love you. Luckily I don’t run into these dimfucks often since l live in the People’s Republik of Portland Oregon. Though if you drive 10 minutes outside the commune, the mega churches and Tonya Harding wannabees are rampant. I prefer to stay with the DFH’s. Keep it up Anne Laurie I await your next dispatch with great anticipation.
Slaney Black
What I want to know is, what are they doing out in public at all???? Don’t no one care about being respectable anymore?
eemom
I share the rage and the boiled over blood pressure (as noted in my comment about Sullyhole earlier) — but for a slight pressure-easing touch, thought I’d ask if anyone ever saw the movie “Citizen Ruth”?
A brilliant, darkly comedic take on this issue as to which there is absolutely nothing funny.
Amanda
@freelancer: Agree with you about the excellence of Olbermann’s final segment tonight, altho I gotta say (and totally not saying this to you, just riffing off your comment)…
Was I the only one bothered by the fact that KO couldn’t find one woman to be on his show to discuss abortion rights? And instead he had on Andrew Sullivan who I can’t say I was that impressed with. And Sullivan proceeded to go on and on about how awful abortion is, how he hates late term abortion and tho comments on his own website pricked his conscience on that subject, he’d still like to see late term abortion outlawed. WTF??
In what magical fantasy land does Andrew Sullivan live in where fetal anomolies and other medical emergencies/complications late in pregnancy will somehow never happen again if we wish hard enough? In what universe where we put 500 obstacles in front of women who want an abortion will we never see late term abortions even tho women are DELAYED on purpose? In what universe will a woman’s future fertility or health never again be endangered late in pregnancy for any number of reasons that are not and never will be under her control — ie nature and bad luck?
I find it hard to believe that the crack Countdown booking team can’t do much better.
I was far, far more impressed and moved by Rachel’s interview with the amazing and courageous Dr. Susan Wicklund. They both did a great job of making this issue (abortion rights) and this tragedy (Dr. Tiller’s murder) personal and real. Dr. Wicklund’s perspective is almost never heard unencumbered in our public dialogue. Major kudos to Rachel for having Dr. Wicklund on her show.
Dr. Wicklund interview:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26315908/
Oh and the description of anti-choice protesters in the original post? Spot on and priceless. Thanks for the laugh on a day where it was hard to find the laughter.
Slaney Black
The same magical fantasy land where you can somehow be a gay pro-life pro-pr0n Catholic Thatcherite Burkean anti-racist anti-affirmative-action whatever the fuck else he’s calling himself this week.
Just a block or two down the elven gumdrop highway from Rod Dreher’s crunchy-conservative hippy commune where no one has sex, ever.
asiangrrlMN
@Amanda: You weren’t the only one, Amanda. Check out…mumble mumble thread in which eemom and I were ranting about Sully, too. She’s 100, and I’m 101. I also was pretty mad that no one had a female until Rachel brought on Dr. Wicklund (and friend of Dr. Tiller’s).
Amanda
@Slaney Black: Okay, thanks for laugh numero 2 of the evening! I think that’s one of the best descriptions of Sully I’ve ever read.
mannemalon
Envision the symphony of a million wingnut popcorn kernels popping if a law was created to allow abortion doctors to carry concealed weapons.
Calming Influence
Read the most well-researched analysis of who these people are, and the way they think:
Bob Altemeyer’s – The Authoritarians
Read it for free, or buy a cost-of-printing only copy from lulu and leave it in the laundromat when you’re done with it.
The truth is out there.
Slaney Black
@Calming Influence: That was a little long and pluggy, but tnx.
Amanda
@asiangrrlMN: Thanks for the link to the earlier thread — had missed that one…
Ninerdave
@Slaney Black:
I absolutely love Jack Van Impe and his wife Rexella! (which, no joke, my spell checker tells me should be spelled Rectal). That show is absolutely hysterical.
@geg6: Can’t you start bringing in a copy of the Satanic Bible or something to keep at your desk or better in the desk drawer closest too her? Hell if they fire you, you’ve got a hell of a law suit and might be able to reinvigorate that 401k of yours. haha
Calming Influence
@Slaney Black: @50
Sorry, I should have edited, but it’s very important that we all understand that this authoritarian mindset isn’t the result of lack of information or failure to see the big picture; they truly perceive the world differently. They do not look at evidence objectively. They do not do well at logical reasoning if it conflicts even slightly with their worldview.
Both right-wing and left-wing terrorists are born and nurtured from this authoritarian mindset, and we need to understand that to combat it.
Bob Altermeyer is the leading researcher on the authoritarian personality, and John Dean relied heavily on Altermeyer’s research in his book ‘Conservatives Without Conscience’. (which you should also buy and leave in the laundromat when you’re finished with it :)
Slaney Black
Calming Influence: Not to worry Bob! I see a lot of truth in what you write. I posted this on another thread…
Have you ever come across that baring-the-teeth thing in the course of your researches? It’s something I never noticed until years after I flipped. Scared me I’d watched that expression so many times without being creeped the f’ out.
The Raven
Hee.
Oh, someOne was:
Slaney Black
I saw Chomsky talk about this once. On one level I agreed with him. On another level, I realized that complete disdain for such phenomena accounts for 65% of his complete inability to move public opinion with his analysis.
Cain
@vishnu schizt:
Yeah, I’ve been to the Planned Parenthood locally here and it seems fairly secure with no crazies around. Generally, everybody in the portland area are progressives (hey 60K people showed up for Obama.. grandest sight I ever saw.. take it with me to the grave)
cain
Little Dreamer
@Amanda:
Perhaps I’m wrong, but it seems since Rachel got her own show, Keith doesn’t feature many females anymore and Rachel features more speakers of both genders. I didn’t notice this much before, thanks for asking. I just know that I look forward to Richard Wolffe on Keith’s show quite often.
BDeevDad
Question is which herd is more difficult to escape from? I’d say sports, at least it seems that way WRT when I read the comments here.
asiangrrlMN
@Little Dreamer: Oooh, Richard Wolffe. Yum.
TenguPhule
Please remember to always go for a kill shot when hunting as it is unsporting to leave them wounded and running.
Also, be sure to clean the carcass immediately as there are several large scent glands located near the ass which will taint the meat if not removed quickly.
Finally, never kill more then can be utilized in a timely fashion. Suggested uses include: pig feed, yard fertilizer, FOX producer’s dinner catering and shark chum.
Calming Influence
I guess I’m trying to push the idea that whining about how stupid and ignorant they are, as entertaining as that may be, is not likely to change things. (And be assured that I include myself deeply in the middle of the whiners.) After reading Bob Altermeyer’s work, I’ll admit that I don’t have any good ideas about how to combat authoritarianism. Maybe if more people understand what it is, like you folks, someone will come up with an idea…
Little Dreamer
@Calming Influence:
You mean the very fact that I want to take Bill O’Reilly’s sagging and ugly nutsack into my gloved hand and squeeze until it pops means I may have been influenced by this?
But I would NEVER do it, at least I don’t think I would. Give me time, I may get around to it.
Little Dreamer
@asiangrrlMN:
Well, yes, he is cute… but I appreciate his intellect. ;)
matoko_chan
The prolifers are fakes and poseurs. If they relly cared about teh Unborn they would be protesting the wholesale manufacture of embryos in fertilty therapy, thousands of “human lives” destined to be preserved in the frozen life-in-death of terminal cryostasis, until their use-by date expires and they get flushed.
If those women relly cared about stopping the icy genocide of legions of teh Unborn, they could volunteer their own personal uterii as host wombs.
And I don’t think the prolife movement can recover from this.
Prolife sentiment was trending up in the polls, but the Ross Douthat mask has slipped, and we all saw the true face of the prolife movement– Scott Roeder.
Blue Raven
I must agree with one observation… I am quite sincere in my statement year after year that the Yankees suck. In fact, they’re starting to do so in reality, not just in my opinion, so it’s not as if I’m wrong anymore.
Aside from that nitpick, Anne, I am even more glad than ever that you got picked to blog here. This issue needs more female voices desperately. We have too many men trying to speak for us on both sides (sorry, Keith, but you blew the guest list badly tonight). Our stories, damn it. Our bodies, our rights, our fucking stories.
freelancer
Ladies in the thread,
As a straight white male atheist, it just struck me as noteworthy that someone thoughtful who, while gay, foreign, and Catholic, seemed to me to be at first glance the complete opposite ideologue to my position, such as Sully, was able to elucidate it in a way where I felt him more of an ally than other atheists who’ve commented publicly.
Aside from Anne Laurie’s post and the posts Sully and DougJ have printed of the anecdotes of the women who have benefited from the services of Dr Tiller, I haven’t felt a real need for the online presence of the female story. This is probably, most obviously out of my own ignorance, and that the woman I’ve been dating has given me enough feedback on the subject that I felt I was in the right.
Outside of that, I can see that there is a moral imperative to go on the hunt for everyone that would threaten liberty.
I particularly would like to entertain and Anne’s idea of recruiting GYN’s to serve in the Nat’l Guard in embattled sections of the country.
Hell, Drive 30 min out of the metro area of Omaha (and many other areas), and you’re sure to see backasswards, self-made anti-choice signs that litter the farmers’ fields of the midwest.
Omaha voted in Obama and our new Democratic Mayor Jim Suttle, but it’s the rural/retarded segment of the Nebraskan population that we have to blame for Ben Nelson, Mike Johanns, Lee Terry, and Jeff Fortenberry. Sorry, but we’re getting there.
And, anyways, I agree with you in the first place, the first and most prominent voices on this should have been women, most notably the women who have bittersweetly benefited from this physician’s necessary services.
Phoenician in a time of Romans
@geg6: Can’t you start bringing in a copy of the Satanic Bible or something to keep at your desk or better in the desk drawer closest too her
Or, you know, look into drawing up voudon veves. Or do something wierd involving voodoo dolls. Or aboriginal pointing-the-bone ceremonies.
Apsaras
And Surprise Surprise Surprise, along comes Will Saletan on Slate.com to equate Dr. Tiller with his murderer. Please reserve an update for his ilk, Anne.
AkaDad
Would it be wrong to take pictures of protesters at abortion clinics, then post them on a site called Potential Domestic Terrorists?
Laura W
@Amanda:
That was, by far, the best segment I’ve seen on tv since the killing. I thought about it long after watching it twice last night.
Edit: I was especially moved by the Dr.’s assertion that women who have had abortions step forward and say so, giving back up to the physicians that perform them. Her point about people not realizing how common they are is so true. I mean, it’s not something you put on your resume or online dating profile.
Doug
99% vent, 1% insight.
I prefer my spleen with a dash of wit. For example:
“I’ll be interested to hear how more guns could have prevented this.”
So basically, what xj – not the auto said.
schrodinger's cat
Why do religious fundamentalists of all stripes obsess about controlling women and their sexuality.
jenniebee
@AkaDad: There’s a clinic near me and every Saturday there are about five protesters out in front of it. I’m tempted to go up there this weekend with a camera and a notebook, get pictures and take down their license plate numbers.
Not to do anything with them, but just to bone up on my stalking skillz. Let’s see how they like it when the tables are turned.
Comrade Darkness
@geg6: How about framed bible quotes of things I’m sure she doesn’t want to hear about? Start with passages about religious hypocrisy and then move on to Lot and his daughter…
There is endless material there I’m sure she’ll hate to face every day. Fun times.
Persia
@Apsaras: I stopped reading Saletan after the ‘hey, maybe blacks really are stupid’ article, and have never regretted it.
Kathy in St. Louis
I’ve always wondered how the conservative Republican congressmen and senators, who run every 2 or 6 years on a pro-life platform turned out to be such terrific parents. Even though they must devote 80 hour weeks to campaigning, fund raising, their government duties, meeting with lobbyists (oh, wait that comes under fundraising, doesn’t it?), they still have time to be fabulous parents. Now how do I know this? Because even though my friends and neighbors, relatives and acquaintances have occasionally, gone through the diffucult task of dealing with a teen pregnancy, their kids never have a child out of wedlock. Now some truly nasty people out there might assume that those politicians are totally full of it and when it’s their daughter pregnant, or their son fathering a child outside the bonds of holy matrimony, they do what many others do and chose abortion. I’d rather think that it’s their excellent parenting skills. Those skills are probably akin to their office management skills and excellent marriages, since none of the female staffers in their offices seem to turn up preggers, either. They could also just be lucky, or hypocritical. All this thinking is giving me a headache.