Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Weird. Rome has an American Pope and America has a Russian President.

Authoritarian republicans are opposed to freedom for the rest of us.

Second rate reporter says what?

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

“In the future, this lab will be a museum. do not touch it.”

If you voted for Trump, you don’t get to speak about ethics, morals, or rule of law.

Just because you believe it, that does not make it true.

Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls 2 years from now.

Fear or fury? The choice is ours.

Shut up, hissy kitty!

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

75% of people clapping liked the show!

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Their boy Ron is an empty plastic cup that will never know pudding.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

People identifying as christian while ignoring christ and his teachings is a strange thing indeed.

They want us to be overwhelmed and exhausted. Focus. Resist. Oppose.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

She burned that motherfucker down, and I am so here for it. Thank you, Caroline Kennedy.

They punch you in the face and then start crying because their fist hurts.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / View From Your Couch

View From Your Couch

by | 143 Comments

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Haven’t had one of these in a while:

BTW, I read this and all I could think of is that Massa’s office must have been like a congressional Reno 911:

“I’m gonna show you a lot more than tickle fights,” said Massa. He also added: “Can you imagine transporting back to this today? It looks like an orgy in Caligula. And anybody that’s been in the Navy knows it.”

Lt. Dangle.

Reader Interactions

143Comments

  3. 3.

    Ekim

    I never had one tickle fight in 27 years in the Coast Guard Reserve. I guess it’s a Navy thing.

  4. 4.

    Mnemosyne

    G went to high school with the guy who plays Lt. Dangle.

    I dunno, I thought it was funny.

  8. 8.

    MikeJ

    @Ekim:

    I never had one tickle fight in 27 years in the Coast Guard Reserve. I guess it’s a Navy thing.

    I think the rule is that if you’re out of sight of land, it’s not gay. Which would rule out a lot of coasties.

    Maybe you should transfer to one of the icebreakers or other deep water ships, if you’re into that.

  11. 11.

    wenchacha

    I’m watching Massa unravel on Glenn Beck’s show via Countdown. Sweet.

    This is so very sad. Massa isn’t my rep, but I live in the next district. He came across really well back when he was going up against crazy-ass Randy Kuhl. Maybe that’s what blinded me.

    A friend told me that she had heard Massa was not that bright, after he had been elected. That was never the vibe I got, but OMG, it’s painfully obvious now.

    I really wish New York would stop being so fucked up.

  14. 14.

    mai naem

    Is Eric Massa an intentional trojan horse for the Repubs? And, yeah I know “trojan” shouldn’t be a term anywhere in this conversation.

  15. 15.

    Max

    I accepted a job offer in Vancouver, WA today! Very excited. Bye bye Bay Area. Hello Metro-Portland.

    Still have to see the firm offer letter and all, but we’ve agreed in principle. principal?

    Max +1

  23. 23.

    General Egali Tarian Stuck

    The last one of these, I think I pulled an ass muscle trying to stretch far enough with the camera with a zoom lens. And still keep my pinkies in the frame with the computer screen.

  26. 26.

    chopper

    “he said he wanted to have a tickle fight, but he flashed me and i could see his penis and scrotums.”

    jesus, i miss reno 911.

  27. 27.

    Max

    @demkat620: It does. I have a little survivor guilt for those out of work, because I have a perfectly good job, and this is for a little more money in a cheaper area, but fuck it, I have worked hard for many years to get to this point, so I’m not going to let guilt get me down.

    Congrats to AMomAnon, I see her hubby got a job too.

    Damn Obama.

  28. 28.

    General Egali Tarian Stuck

    @Max: Congrats Max!!

    I spent some time in and around Portland years ago, in fact only a month after MT. St. Helen’s blew. there still was ash laying around. About the most hippyfied big city I was ever in. And the coast line is gorgeous, but foggy and rainy.

  29. 29.

    chopper

    @Max:

    nice. i’m planning on heading out that way in a few years, as soon as the wife finishes her never-ending phD.

  34. 34.

    Chat Noir

    @Max: Hurrah and excellent news! Danny the Wheaten Nerd says congrats. In honor of your job offer, he’s napping in the bedroom.

  35. 35.

    Montysano

    Home sick today (the residual effect from hauling 12 teens to a Unitarian conference last weekend), so I watched A Serious Man.….. and then, a few hours later, I watched it again. Anyone who can mix Hendrix’s “Machine Gun” with Jewish mysticism is aces in my book.

  37. 37.

    demo woman

    OMG.. Washington Post has the interview up..and it starts with Beck and his black board and what to watch for. One question that was not on the black board was is this man nuts?

  40. 40.

    Max

    Thanks everyone! This really is the best community.

    @AsiangrllMN – a thread this morning.

  44. 44.

    MikeJ

    Hey jeffreyw, you ever make tortillas? Thank gopod I picked up a backup batch at the store, because the ones I made are about 73 times too thick. I was doing flour, not masa (didn’t want to think about Rahm’s dick with dinner).

    The pork is still in the crack pot and looks like it will be yummy though.

  46. 46.

    rootless-e

    Goes to show about Rahm who back in 2006 said

    “NY-29 (Map)

    Eric Massa is a fighting Democrat in the 29th district in New York facing freshman Congressman Randy Kuhl. After the first term is when most new Congressmen are defeated, so this is a good time to go after Kuhl. Massa's military background and whip-smart common sense leadership style make him perfect for this rural district.”

    Oh, wait, that wasn’t Rahm. It was NETROOTS.

    http://firedoglake.com/2006/07/29/blue-america-eric-massa-ny-29/

  51. 51.

    mr. whipple

    With these two jobs today I think we’ve moved unemployment from 10.4 to 10.399999999999999999999.

  53. 53.

    Anne Laurie

    @Max:

    I accepted a job offer in Vancouver, WA today! Very excited. Bye bye Bay Area. Hello Metro-Portland.

    Congratulations, Max!

    Maybe when you move up there, it could be an excuse for a Portland-area Balloon-Juice get-together? (Which I can suggest with impunity ‘cuz I’m on the other side of the country.)

  58. 58.

    mr. whipple

    @gbear:

    “I celebrate your success!”

    Indeed. I think I’ll get rip rolling drunk and call in sick tomorrow.

  59. 59.

    Anne Laurie

    @asiangrrlMN:

    A Mom Anon, I hope you see this. Congrats on your hubby getting a job! I’m doing a happy dance for you.

    Seconded (if you’ll accept ‘chair dancing’)!

  60. 60.

    West of the Cascades

    John, if you ever want to make a few bucks, put up a http://www.tunchcam.com website and point it at your futon. There are people who I’m sure would pay good money for that (God knows people pay good money for lots of strange things on the internet).

    BTW the first person who registers that website and tries to sell it to John has to go on a sail with Eric Massa …

  61. 61.

    demo woman

    I watched the Beck clip with Massa that was on the Washington Post and I just have one plea……………………………..Can we stop gerrymandering now.
    Gee… I’m stuck with Tom Price down here and it appears that the way sections are carved out you have no choice but put in folks that are maybe out of their element or just plain nutty.
    Massa was out of his comfort zone and Price is nutty.

  62. 62.

    General Egali Tarian Stuck

    @Anne Laurie:

    (Which I can suggest with impunity ‘cuz I’m on the other side of the country.)

    I know we all take it for granted. But sometimes, it just strikes me as awesome that we can type out a few words and push a button and in seconds, or less, another human can read it thousands of miles away.

  63. 63.

    Annie

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    LOL. There was a little double entendre there….

    @Max:

    Congrats. This sounds fantastic….

    @chopper:

    As someone who went through the never ending process, my sympathies….I still have the scars and nightmares…

  64. 64.

    Ash Can

    OK, now there’s an ad for a gay military dating service in the left margin, which the light-hearted banter here has snagged. I love this joint.

  67. 67.

    mr. whipple

    @Ash Can:

    “OK, now there’s an ad for a gay military dating service in the left margin, which the light-hearted banter here has snagged.”

    I got one for pizza. Maybe Google is doing some sort of targeting. :)

  69. 69.

    MikeJ

    @jeffreyw: I will survive on the store bought. Perhaps next week I’ll go see mom and do the corn tortillas. She grew up in the south. She can make anything with cornmeal work.

  71. 71.

    Ash Can

    @mr. whipple:

    Maybe Google is doing some sort of targeting. :)

    Sounds good to me. I’m a straight female, and find the fellow pictured in the ad very easy on the eyes. If Teh Google wants to toss a few cute boys my way, I won’t complain.

  75. 75.

    Max

    @demo woman: I wonder what’s up with cancer thing he originally referenced.

    Haven’t heard him say much about that.

    If he’s really sick, then I do feel bad. If that was b.s., then pox on him.

  76. 76.

    Anne Laurie

    But regarding Eric ‘Hot Mess’ Massa… from what I’ve seen so far, it may be less about sexual orientation and more about (deeply inappropriate) power displays. “I’m in a position of superiority, and will prove it by demonstrating I can do anything I want to you, including simulating physical assault/rape” is a deeply-rooted form of primitive mammalian social interaction that’s gotten any number of tree shrews, monkeys, apes, dogs, cats, and human-men-with-more-testosterone-than-brains into trouble when they lost the thread. Maybe he’s “really” gay, or maybe he’s just the equivalent of one of those leg-humping dogs who can’t be trusted out of his crate when company comes over?

  77. 77.

    ajr22

    The expression Massa used to explaining what he said to his male intern “I should be facking you” is full of win. He is clearly a raging heterosexual.

  78. 78.

    Mike in NC

    Back in the day, a standard shipboard joke went, “Did you hear about the guy who reenlisted? He didn’t want to leave his buddies behind”.

  80. 80.

    demo woman

    @Max: We have all these cut out sections for congress and try to pick out a winner and sometimes we screw up. He was definitely out of his element. He did do one thing right and that was to make Beck look like a bigger asshole than he was already. I do hope that he is okay though health wise.

  81. 81.

    HRA

    Congratulations Max! Don’t worry about your present job. Someone will fill it and they will most likely need it.

    Congratulations to MomAnon’s husband.

    Good news !

  82. 82.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Ash Can: I just have the standard Project Wonderful, Contemporary Artists, and Glassy-Eyed $6 shirt guy. Now I can go back to not looking.

    Though, an ad for Alice in Wonderland with Alan Rickman as the Caterpillar would be much appreciate. I’m just sayin’.

  83. 83.

    demo woman

    @Max: One more thing we need pics of the new abode!….

    Is anyone watching Massa on Larry King Live?

  84. 84.

    mai naem

    I just did a loan at Kiva and was going around the website. Of the various Kiva lending groups the Atheist/Agnostic/Freethinker group is the biggest loaner at about 1.6 mil followed by the Christian lending group at 1 mil. Methinks BartBoy Stupak should spend more time on the love thy neighbor bit in christianity than the stick your nose in other people’s bidness bit.

  85. 85.

    Annie

    OT. Just cleaned the area rugs today. Only to have one of our cats just do a kinda of sitting thing while he rubbed his butt all the way down one rug. At first we laughed, now, I am thinking, Yuk, what is that all about? Do we need to clean again?

  86. 86.

    RedKitten

    With these two jobs today I think we’ve moved unemployment from 10.4 to 10.399999999999999999999.

    Well, um…funny you should mention that. :)

    I had an interview a couple of weeks ago, and this morning, I got a call from one of my references, saying that they called him and that from what they were saying, it sounds like I have the job. : ) So now I’m waiting for the actual offer, and all day today, was jumping like an idiot every time the phone rang. Nothing today, though — hopefully I’ll hear from them tomorrow, because the suspense is just killing me.

  87. 87.

    SIA

    @wenchacha:

    I really wish New York would stop being so fucked up.

    Don’t worry – Georgia will always top NY on the embarrassment factor.

  89. 89.

    SIA

    @Max: Congrats! You’re leaving one beautiful place for another beautiful place! What does Max think?

  90. 90.

    Bonnie L. McLellan

    @Max:
    Welcome, neighbor! Lots of people live in the Couv and love it, but I am not one of them. Consider living in PDX and commuting- the reverse commute across the bridge is okay at rush hour. I live within walking distance of 2 Powells stores, Hawthorne, Belmont, and Broadway Streets and downtown. AND I have a big dog and grow my own apples and blueberries. The symphony is very good. The cops are very dangerous. This is the best place I’ve ever lived. Welcome

  91. 91.

    demo woman

    @SIA: lol . We can’t raise cigarette taxes in our state because congressfolk are concerned that might mean their kids will smoke pot instead. Yeah, it will take a long time before other states can beat that.

  92. 92.

    mai naem

    The Larry King Massa interview is a classic. Massa to King-“When’s the last time you had a political argument with a man naked?”
    IMHO I don’t think Massa is doing himself any favors having us visualize Larry King nekkid.

  94. 94.

    SIA

    @demo woman:

    One question that was not on the black board was is this man nuts?

    Which one? Or both?!

    Glenn looked so sad once he realized he wasn’t gonna be scoopin’ ta shit.

  95. 95.

    demo woman

    @mai naem: Thank you.. please keep blogging but now I’m going to drink bleach to try to clean the image from by brain..

  96. 96.

    Max

    @RedKitten: May my good fortune rub off on you.

    @Bonnie – I kind of like the idea of no state income tax by working/living in Vancouver. After the high costs of living in the Bay Area, I am looking forward to a little discretionary income.

    I haven’t had “savings” since I moved to this state.

    @SIA – I’m sure once Max seeing the creeks and waterfalls and trails and mountains, he’ll feel like he’s in paradise.

    BTW – Massa is making Larry seem lucid. How crazy is that shit?

  97. 97.

    Annie

    @RedKitten:

    Great news. Usually they don’t check references unless they are going to offer. The call may not come tomorrow. So, try to relax, and kisses to the little man…Our hearts are with you…

  100. 100.

    SIA

    @Anne Laurie:

    A Mom Anon, I hope you see this. Congrats on your hubby getting a job! I’m doing a happy dance for you.

    Thirded, MomAnon! I know that’s a weight off your shoulders.

  102. 102.

    RedKitten

    @demo woman: The baby is doing great. He’s got two brand-new teeth, and just yesterday, figured out how to get to a sitting up position from a lying-down position. It was weird, because just last week I was helping him sit up, and he just couldn’t keep his balance, so I figured he was nowhere near ready. Yesterday I’m in the kitchen prepping supper, and he’s laying on the floor gnawing on his Sophie giraffe, and I turn around to look at him, and he’s sitting up, just as calm as you please, looking at me.

    Oh, I just added two new pictures of him at my url. I think you can see the teeth in question in one of the photos.

  103. 103.

    Joseph Nobles

    Do you know how many gay porn sites are going to be releasing Tickle Fight videos in the next week or so? Chi Chi Larue probably already has a script on Massa’s life story in production.

  105. 105.

    SIA

    @demo woman: I wish Tom Price, Paul Broun, Jack Kingston and the gang would smoke ’em a funny cigarette. Jeez.

    PS And I wish Saxby Chambliss would be caught with a live boy AND a dead girl.

    PPS And may I have a unicorn and HCR please?

  106. 106.

    Ash Can

    One question that was not on the black board was is this man nuts?

    Somehow this makes me envision Rahm quoting that Rocky Horror ad-lib to Massa in the shower: “I always knew you were crazy, Eric, but now I can see youre nuts.”

  107. 107.

    Tattoosydney

    Plus this. Elephant rescued from a Thai work camp is on her first pregnancy. Two days ago, doctors decide that the baby has died during labour. This morning, baby born, against all expectations alive and (although weakly) kicking. Entire city of Sydney goes awwww.

  113. 113.

    Anne Laurie

    @RedKitten:

    I had an interview a couple of weeks ago, and this morning, I got a call from one of my references, saying that they called him and that from what they were saying, it sounds like I have the job. : ) So now I’m waiting for the actual offer…

    I’ll be holding those positive thoughts for you, RedKitten!

  114. 114.

    Mike in NC

    Georgia will always top NY on the embarrassment factor.

    SC wants to have a word with you…

  115. 115.

    Joseph Nobles

    @SIA:

    LOL! As in:

    Jane Hamsher is throwing a fit over the passage of the Senate health care bill and I don’t give a Hot Massa Tickle if she does.

  117. 117.

    Annie

    @Ash Can:

    Thanks. I just read the link to scooting. I think I will take him for a checkup…He seems fine, running all over the place and purring constantly as he always does…Sometimes it is hard to tell when they are not fine…Come tomorrow at 5:00am, I am sure he will bite my fingers, and look at me with the look that says…”why is breakfast late.”

  118. 118.

    Anne Laurie

    @Annie:

    Just cleaned the area rugs today. Only to have one of our cats just do a kinda of sitting thing while he rubbed his butt all the way down one rug. At first we laughed, now, I am thinking, Yuk, what is that all about? Do we need to clean again?

    Your cat is scent-marking ‘his’ rug, but by human-cleanliness standards this probably doesn’t demand a re-cleaning. Keep in mind that a cat who lovingly rubs his forehead against you is also scent-marking, and us ungifted primates can’t even tell that we’ve been “branded”. (Unlike dogs, cats almost never have problems with their anal sacs. I have heard of cats ‘scooting’ but only when they’ve managed to eat something like string or tinsel, if you get the picture, and if that was your guy’s problem you would have gotten the picture.)

  124. 124.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Annie: Um, my Shadow will do that when he has a dingleberry clinging to his rear. Just sayin’.

    @Tattoosydney: Awwwwwwww! (And, yay on gay marriage in DC!).

    @RedKitten: YAY! Crossing all my fingers and toes for you. P.S. Good lord, but does SamKitten get more adorable by the day.

  125. 125.

    Zuzu's Petals

    Jon Stewart just schooled, and I mean SCHOOLED, that douchebag Marc Thiessen on the DOJ lawyer issue. Went to overtime, all viewable at his website:

  126. 126.

    FlipYrWhig

    Yeah, that guy Thiessen was like the archetypal right-wing dillweed, like the people who wrote for the campus conservative newspaper. Paunchy, argumentative, pugnacious, and–always a dead giveaway–completely unfunny but sure he’s quite the quipster. He was like Jonah Goldberg without the minor self-deprecating streak. It was seriously making my pulse race. He was _that_ big of a douchebag that I was itching for a physical fight.

  127. 127.

    Yutsano

    @asiangrrlMN: I’m enjoying all this positive news tonight, however I’m having a touch of the sad. The Dawg is shipping out to his post tomorrow. The good news is I caught him RIGHT as I got home from work and we got to say good journey to each other properly. So I’m not sad as in “I’ll never see or hear from him again” sad, but he’s gonna be one continent away and he’s worried about doing a good job. Enough of that though, YAY NEW JOBS!!

  130. 130.

    FlipYrWhig

    @Zuzu’s Petals: I’ve never seen someone do that much talking over the host while _simultaneously_ saying that he wasn’t getting a fair chance to speak. I thought Ari Fleischer was the most skin-crawl-inducing Bush functionary, with Alberto Gonzalez a strong second, but Thiessen is rapidly climbing the ranks.

  132. 132.

    Yutsano

    @asiangrrlMN: He’s being nervous over nothing, he’ll do awesome. I’m actually trying to compose an e-mail to him in my head but I’m thinking I need to sleep on it right now. I think, and again I could be overanalyzing it, but he might just have been trying to get me to blink on the L word first tonight. Instead, I told him the way I think we express that; I said I’d miss him.

  134. 134.

    Yutsano

    @Tattoosydney: Who’s young? I’m getting up there you whippersnapper! Okay so he’s a pup next to me (it’s not drastic, only nine years difference) and I don’t need to have him say it. I can always tell when he’s being really serious because he talks a bit faster. Or I just know how he is.

  136. 136.

    Zuzu's Petals

    @FlipYrWhig:

    I’ve never seen someone do that much talking over the host while simultaneously saying that he wasn’t getting a fair chance to speak.

    God, no kidding.

  139. 139.

    Liz

    That dog on your lap looks suspiciously like mine. Although I don’t allow mine on the couch.

    And allow me to say that I learn an awful lot in these threads.

  141. 141.

    Ron

    @wenchacha: I don’t live in Massa’s district, but I do work in it. (I’m in Michael “Oops, I don’t know if I really like healthcare reform anymore” Arcuri’s district). Massa ran as a progressive, but his voting record was kind of iffy on that. (ISTR he voted against both cap and trade and the house version of HCR) and frankly I imagine his base is just as happy to seem him gone, especially after making a fool of himself. Unfortunately I think his district goes back in the republican column, as mine will too most likely.

  143. 143.

    Dr. Morpheus

    @wenchacha:

    I’m watching Massa unravel on Glenn Beck’s show via Countdown. Sweet.
    __
    This is so very sad. Massa isn’t my rep, but I live in the next district. He came across really well back when he was going up against crazy-ass Randy Kuhl. Maybe that’s what blinded me.
    __
    A friend told me that she had heard Massa was not that bright, after he had been elected. That was never the vibe I got, but OMG, it’s painfully obvious now.
    __
    I really wish New York would stop being so fucked up.

    Oh, cheer up, there’s always the Carolinas to out do the craziness that crawls out of New York.

    And then they’re my home state, Illinois…Need I say more….

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