Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Of course you can have champagne before noon. That’s why orange juice was invented.

Since we are repeating ourselves, let me just say fuck that.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

Incompetence, fear, or corruption? why not all three?

It’s all just conspiracy shit beamed down from the mothership.

Oh FFS you might as well trust a 6-year-old with a flamethrower.

Today’s gop: why go just far enough when too far is right there?

At some point, the ability to learn is a factor of character, not IQ.

If you thought you’d already seen people saying the stupidest things possible on the internet, prepare yourselves.

Jesus, Mary, & Joseph how is that election even close?

We’ve had enough carrots to last a lifetime. break out the sticks.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

A democracy can’t function when people can’t distinguish facts from lies.

The current Supreme Court is a dangerous, rogue court.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

You can’t attract Republican voters. You can only out organize them.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

Sadly, media malpractice has become standard practice.

It is possible to do the right thing without the promise of a cookie.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Motown is Joe-Town!

You are here: Home / Erick Erickson’s Brutally Embarrassing Love Letter to Herman Cain

Erick Erickson’s Brutally Embarrassing Love Letter to Herman Cain

by | 73 Comments

This post is in: 

Disappointed Erick Erickson is disappointed.

 Erick Erickson has a sad about Herman Cain:

Herman,

I owe you a good bit of my present career in radio. You leaving opened the door for me.

I still believe you can win the Republican nomination.

I still believe you can beat Barack Obama.

I still believe you can be one of the most inspiring Presidents since Ronald Reagan.

The Herman Cain I know would not and could not do what you are accused of. And I know it is incredibly unfair to ask you, in effect, to prove a negative. How the hell does one prove one did not do something?

But Herman, part of your refreshing appeal is your willingness to say things like “I don’t know” and “I’ll surround myself with the best people who do know.”

It is abundantly obvious to a lot of us Herman that you are not living up to your own words. You said you would surround yourself with the best people — the competent people to help you.

Last week, J.D. Gordon had a disastrous performance on a Blackberry on Geraldo’s show. His performance set the tone for the Monday news shows, all of which pointed out that your own communications vice president would not deny the story.

Then Mark Block went on TV to blame Curt Anderson only to walk it back the next day.

This week, Mark Block again went on TV, said he had verified the identify of a reporter as the son of your accuser, and got it totally wrong. But he said it was verified. It was a lie.

Herman, you said you’d surround yourself with the best people and you’ve surrounded yourself with Class A failures. The problems you are facing are problems of campaign staffing. You’ve failed to live up to your own standard of hiring the best people.

I still believe you can win. But to do so, you must fire your staff and start over. It is the only way forward for you. This communications strategy has been an unmitigated disaster. And if this story doesn’t kill your campaign, the one about Mark Block initially running your campaign through a 501(c)(3) surely will.

Herman, you must reboot for victory.

Your friend,
Erick

I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING.

“Refreshing appeal”?  Seriously?

Did Erickson wander down to a neighborhood elementary school and pay an eight year old in Milk Duds for this tripe?

How embarrassing.

[cross-posted at Angry Black Chronicles]

Reader Interactions

73Comments

  1. 1.

    Martin

    Herman, you said you’d surround yourself with the best people and you’ve surrounded yourself with Class A failures.

    Yes, that would be Republicans he’s surrounded himself with, Herr Erick.

  2. 2.

    Steve

    For a completely dishonest and not entirely literate person, Erick is actually pretty good at this game. This is not the first time I’ve seen the “I’m so sad your campaign is crashing and burning” routine from him. It’s a great way to distance yourself from a failed candidate without pissing off his followers.

  5. 5.

    TenguPhule

    Herman, you must reboot for victory.

    404 Error, Intelligence not found.

    If you feel you have received this message in error, you haven’t.

  6. 6.

    dmsilev

    The Herman Cain I know would not and could not do what you are accused of. And I know it is incredibly unfair to ask you, in effect, to prove a negative. How the hell does one prove one did not do something?

    Well, Cain did make sure to mention that there are thousands of women he *hasn’t* harassed for every one who is accusing him. That’s a start, right?

  7. 7.

    Rick Massimo

    And I know it is incredibly unfair to ask you, in effect, to prove a negative. How the hell does one prove one did not do something?

    Yeah, how the hell does one prove he’s not a goat-fking child molester?

    Anyway, according to Erick Erickson, Herman Cain’s big flaw is not hiring people who are as awesome as Herman Cain is. Maybe the surrounding of oneself with Class A failures is a sign of something? Just maybe?

    Oh fk. I just realized. He’s applying for a job with the Cain campaign. That’s what he’s doing.

    Well, he MIGHT have to give his CNN gig if he gets one. MIGHT …

  9. 9.

    GregB

    The newest rightwing line to repeat over and over is now:

    You can’t prove a negative.

    Of course it was only a few years ago when we were lectured about how much character counts and that those with character would avoid the appearance of impropriety.

    Seems like only yesterday.

  11. 11.

    Jay in Oregon

    I owe you a good bit of my present career in radio. You leaving opened the door for me.

    This looks like the most left-handed compliment/passive-aggressive shiv-between-the-ribs ever.

  13. 13.

    JGabriel

    Erick Erickson:

    Herman, you must reboot for victory.

    Herman Cain:

    But … these boots are fine. I just cleaned them on Sunday.

    .

  14. 14.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    @TenguPhule:

    404 Error, Intelligence not found

    I think that’s actually a 999 error.

    “Herman, you must reboot for victory” really ought to be immortalized as a tag, also too.

  15. 15.

    Redshift

    Earlier this week, Ewick actually said that Cain needed to “put this thing to bed,” but that it “keeps dribbling out.”

    If Cain were running a real campaign (and for some reason thought Ewickson were worth bothering with), the only response to any of this would be “STOP HELPING!!”

  18. 18.

    Redshift

    I owe you a good bit of my present career in radio. You leaving opened the door for me.

    Well, there’s another strike against Cain that I didn’t know about…

  20. 20.

    c u n d gulag

    Yes CNN – Erick Erickson – a worthy hire.

    What, everyone else you considered for the job was so drunk or high after an “Appreciating Ronald Reagan” get-together was discovered to be choking or vomiting to death, too stupid to remember that breathing is an involuntary reflex?

    And you keep Erick on?

    He must be your Jerry Sandusky and have pictures of Wolf, and the ‘Worst Fucking Political Team in the History of the Entire Fucking Planet’ schtupping little boys – or Candy Crowley eating them – literally!

  21. 21.

    SpotWeld

    Anyone else read the first few lines and start hearing the opening theme to Pokemon in thier head?

  24. 24.

    JCT

    I still believe you can be one of the most inspiring Presidents since Ronald Reagan.

    Wow. How cool, Herman can say idiotic things regarding foreign policy just like Reagan and he isn’t even suffering from early Alzheimer’s!

    Ewick is a numbskull.

  25. 25.

    Redshift

    @Linda Featheringill:

    So the question arises in my twisted brain: Does Herman just have no respect for females or does he have no respect for anybody [except the Kochs]?

    Tough question. It reminds me of the award-show incident where Kanye West declared “George Bush doesn’t care about black people” — my first thought was, that’s not quite right; George Bush doesn’t care about anybody.

  29. 29.

    John O

    @JGabriel:

    Funny, I was just thinking God doesn’t love me enough to make the Herminator the nominee.

    Zandar’s post about these folks doing disservice to clowns was right on.

  30. 30.

    Catsy

    I saw that this morning. For the most part they are trying not to freak out in public, but if you read between the lines I think a lot of the wingnuts are starting to realize how screwed they are with this shark-jumping contest masquerading as a primary. The only people Not Named Romney who have any chance of winning the primary are people they should pray never do.

  32. 32.

    scav

    Herman, you must reboot for victory.

    Tell me you can see that over a fuzzy little kitten with its paw tenderly placed on your keyboard. (f-stop ~4)

    Is he always like this?

    Also, I want Nancy Smash in a tiara.

  33. 33.

    Cacti

    The Herman Cain I know loves and respects women.

    Because he said to me “That’s what I tell all my bitches.”

  34. 34.

    dmsilev

    The comments on that RedState article are hilarious. You’ve got Perry acolytes slamming Cain true believers (and vice versa), a lone voice pointing out that Mitt Romney will probably win, suggestions of various Fox anchors who would be best suited as Cain communications spokesdroids, an attack on Erick for supporting “local democrats”, etc.

    I’m pretty sure it took until March or April of 2008 for the liberal blogosphere to get this polarized.

  35. 35.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Herman Cain is pigshit, and so is anyone who supports him.

    This means you, son of Fuckerson.

  40. 40.

    JGabriel

    So. I’m playing Skyrim and I decide to try Erick, Son of Erick’s advice and Reboot For Victory!

    Now I’ve lost all my settings, all my progress, and all my carefully selected avatar choices.

    I’m warning you, Herman, don’t take any fucking advice from Erickson. You’ll just lose everything and have to start from scratch, and that’s if you’re lucky and don’t trash your install. Reboot for Victory, my ass.

    .

  43. 43.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    Herman, you said you’d surround yourself with the best people and you’ve surrounded yourself with Class A failures.

    Deja vu! Didn’t this same thing happen with Dubya?

  44. 44.

    Redshift

    It is abundantly obvious to a lot of us Herman that you are not living up to your own words. You said you would surround yourself with the best people — the competent people to help you.

    You know, a moderately intelligent reaction to someone saying “I don’t know a lot, but I know enough to hire people who know more and judge whether or not their advice is good” is to at least say “I find that hard to believe.” Even someone who isn’t as bright might remember that we just had a president who declared the same thing, and it was a big enough disaster that even conservatives don’t mention his name and try to convince themselves that he wasn’t “really” conservative.

    But at a bare minimum, if you have someone who makes that declaration and then hires people, not as highly technical experts but as direct subordinates running the nuts and bolts of his organization, who are complete incompetents, the only rational conclusion is not that he should be believed about hiring competent help, but that he’s as incompetent at that as at everything else!

  46. 46.

    Belafon (formerly anonevent)

    But Herman, part of your refreshing appeal is your willingness to say things like “I don’t know” and “I’ll surround myself with the best people who do know.”

    I believe some guy named George Bush said and did the same thing. And therefore, the man we elected never ran the country.

  47. 47.

    JGabriel

    @quannlace:

    Jesus, this letter’s for real, not a parodY? How much bourbon has Erickson been drinking?

    Erick doesn’t need bourbon to sound like a parody, just a keyboard. Or a camera. Or a microphone.

    Or a mirror.

    .

  48. 48.

    Lawnguylander

    I won’t be doing a damn bit of searching to see if my memory is correct but I think he wrote an even more embarrassing plea to Fred Thompson in 2008 begging him to get back in the race after his campaign fizzled out.

  51. 51.

    Redshift

    @dmsilev: He just needs to figure out what they should all mail to Romney (flip flops, maybe?) and then they can smirk together and bask in the glow of the vast influence of wingnut bloggers.

  53. 53.

    Brachiator

    So who is Erick Erickson, and why should anyone give a rat’s ass about what he writes?

    Herman, you said you’d surround yourself with the best people and you’ve surrounded yourself with Class A failures. The problems you are facing are problems of campaign staffing.

    What a sad attempt at misdirection. The problem is not the people Cain surrounds himself with. The problem is Cain.

  55. 55.

    Tiger Woods

    Herman has a point, what about all the 1000’s of women I didn’t cheat on my wife with. Don’t I get any credit for that? You know I coulda if I wanted to/had the time. Instead, its the same ol’ dozen or so. As I see it, I was 99% faithful.

  57. 57.

    feebog

    Love the closing:

    And if this story doesn’t kill your campaign, the one about Mark Block initially running your campaign through a 501©(3) surely will.

    In other words, we havn’t even gotten to the illegal stuff yet. Hermy, your goose is cooked. So long and thanks for the fish.

  58. 58.

    ET

    I still believe you can be one of the most inspiring Presidents since Ronald Reagan.

    Is there another quote the better illustrates the utter cluelessness of Erik? I am no fan of Reagan but I just had to laugh in the “you’re just so sad” way.

  59. 59.

    Calouste

    @Brachiator:

    Cain hired those people, didn’t he? Of course E.E. is a bit too blinded by his Cain-love to make the logical connection that Cain is surrounded by Class A failures because Cain thought they were the best people.

  60. 60.

    The Tragically Flip

    I still believe you can be one of the most inspiring Presidents since Ronald Reagan.

    If that’s not damning by faint praise, I don’t know what is. 4 post-Reagan presidents, 2 Democrats, and 2 Bushes. Bush Sr. raised taxes and is dead to the right, so Erique here is saying that Cain probably won’t rise to the inspirational level of George W. Bush, but might beat out Bush Sr and some socialists traitors.

    Cain: He’ll be one of the top 5 Presidents since Reagan!

  64. 64.

    JGabriel

    @JCT:

    How cool, Herman can say idiotic things regarding foreign policy just like Reagan and he isn’t even suffering from early Alzheimer’s!

    Now, now, we can’t be sure that Cain isn’t suffering from Alzheimer’s. After all, you can’t disprove a negative.

    .

  65. 65.

    Howard Appel

    I think that one of the reasons that the Herminator’s fund-raising has kept up is that we few, we fortunate few, liberals are contributing to him in the hope that he will be their nominee. He would so drag down the entire republican ticket!!!!!

  66. 66.

    quannlace

    training to be Kristol’s successor in the “always aggressively wrong about everything” chair?

    No, sorry, that title is still held by Dick Morris.

  68. 68.

    karen marie

    @Redshift: I don’t know if he’s up to it. There are a lot of contenders for that honor.

    @ET: It’s exactly that kind of judgment that CNN felt made him qualified to be a political opinionator.

  69. 69.

    Steve

    A lot of people seem to think Erickson is writing this from a place of deep sincerity. I don’t think so, myself.

  70. 70.

    JGabriel

    @Steve:

    A lot of people seem to think Erickson is writing this from a place of deep sincerity.

    I don’t think Erick would know how to find a place of deep sincerity even if a GPS gave him perfect directions. And if he somehow stumbled into one anyway, I’m sure he’d vandalize it.

    .

  73. 73.

    NCSteve

    But Herman, part of your refreshing appeal is your willingness to say things like “I don’t know” and “I’ll surround myself with the best people who do know.”

    Republicans often seem to find candidates who say that “refreshingly appealing.” Certainly, it was “refreshingly appealing” when “I am a proudly ignorant hack of barely average intelligence and that’s what makes me better than that smarty smart smartypants smartass intellectual running against me!” candidates Warren G. Harding and George W. Bush were nominated. And that worked out great, both times.

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