Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

They love authoritarianism, but only when they get to be the authoritarians.

The US Supreme Court is on the ballot in november.

The words do not have to be perfect.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

Following reporting rules is only for the little people, apparently.

The willow is too close to the house.

How can republicans represent us when they don’t trust women?

It may be funny to you motherfucker, but it’s not funny to me.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

Tide comes in. Tide goes out. You can’t explain that.

Stamping your little feets and demanding that they see how important you are? Not working anymore.

They think we are photo bombing their nice little lives.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

🎶 Those boots were made for mockin’ 🎵

Speaker Mike Johnson is a vile traitor to the House and the Constitution.

When they say they’re pro-life, they don’t mean yours.

Too often we confuse noise with substance. too often we confuse setbacks with defeat.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

This fight is for everything.

It’s a good piece. click on over. but then come back!!

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Relentless negativity is not a sign that you are more realistic.

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118Comments

  5. 5.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    She’s a beautiful woman, but the whole accent schtick wears out fast, IMHO.

    SNL seems to me to have really fallen off a cliff since Amy Poehler left. Kristen Wig is supposed to be the stand out, I just don’t find her that funny. I do like the guy they have doing Mitt Romney. “America looked at our campaign and said, “Eh, okay””

  13. 13.

    stickler

    @p.a.: P.A., if boobs can’t save the show, then the show can’t be saved. Channeling Dr. McCoy: “He’s dead, Jim.” (“He,” of course, being the show.)

    Not that I’ve watched SNL since about 1992, of course, when it really could have used more boobs and they probably wouldn’t have been enough anyhow.

  16. 16.

    SatanicPanic

    Has SNL ever been that funny? I’ve always thought that show was about 20% brilliance and 80% dumb filler, even during its heyday.

  21. 21.

    Dork

    Happy Bunny Day, yall. Today we celebrate Zombie Hippie emerging from his grave, looking for BRAINS. Prolly angry that the Romans ganked his Berks.

  29. 29.

    danielx

    Very little can help SNL at this point – I don’t think the ghost of John Belushi would do it, nor yet anybody’s breasts. Perhaps a decent burial is the only thing left…

  30. 30.

    Yutsano

    @danielx: It’s time for SNL to get to a dignified end. Go out on a high note with a retrospective of the best of the last 30 years then turn out the lights quietly. End with dignity as opposed to a cancellation letter.

  32. 32.

    magurakurin

    @stickler: wow, I’m old. I remember seeing SNL in 1975 and thinking by around 1982 that the mine was more or less played out. I guess that show goes up and down. A lot of good comics have made their start over all those years. I haven’t seen the show in well over two decades, but, as an example, I love Will Ferrell.

  33. 33.

    SatanicPanic

    @wasabi gasp: There have been some very funny people on the show- Eddie Murphy, Bill Murray, Maya Rudolph, but I never thought, oh I’ll turn this on and be laughing for an hour and a half.

  34. 34.

    magurakurin

    @SatanicPanic: I’d say so. The first couple of years were very funny and pretty edgy for its day. I would definitely say that Belushi and crew were THAT funny.

  35. 35.

    Gex

    I did not find that to be a problem. But I get really stupid when Sofia Vergara is in view, so maybe that is just right for tolerating SNL.

  36. 36.

    piratedan

    @danielx: i dunno, good writers, talented comedians, the idea and format is just as valid as ever, just the folks making the decisions about what constitutes talent appear to be lacking. Used to be oodles of young folks working the clubs or working in various incarnations of performing groups for sketch or impromptu comedy in the 70’s and 80’s. Can’t say if that is still the case or not, but if its a matter of finding talent, they aren’t trying hard enough.

  38. 38.

    SatanicPanic

    @magurakurin: I’ve seen shows from that era, and they were funny, but not that funny, but then that’s probably because a lot of the jokes were topical and so I wouldn’t get them. I remember the Dana Carvey/Mike Myers years and people thought those shows were soooo funny, but I was not amused by those two at all. Maybe it’s just me. I like the years when Will Ferrell were on the most. That wasn’t that long ago so maybe there’s hope for the show.

  40. 40.

    megamahan

    John, with the recent talk about your conversion, I’m interested in reading some of your older stuff (I started coming here sometime in 2008 or 2009). Which post are you most embarrassed by? Which pre-conversion post are you still proudest of? Which pre-conversion post is still most legitimately funny and witty regardless of political affiliation?

  42. 42.

    WyldPirate

    Little Boots, have you ever considered seeking a prescription for benzodiazepenes?

  45. 45.

    BigSouthern

    I find SNL is a lot like pro wrestling. For most people, it’s never going to be quite as good as when you first got into it, even if there are discernible peaks and valleys of quality. My SNL will always be those years spanning from when Norm McDonald was Weekend Update anchor (best to ever do it IMHO) through the Darrell Hammond as Clinton and Will Ferrell as Bush years to around Ferrell’s departure. I’m sure it will get better than it is now, even though for me it’ll probably never be as good as it was then.

    Of course, wrestling is different. While they’re not all currently being used exactly as I like, any company with Dolph Ziggler, Alberto Del Rio, Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes, CM Punk, and Chris Jericho on the roster is doing something correct.

  51. 51.

    Spaghetti Lee

    I liked SNL a lot during the Fey/Poehler era. Haven’t watched must since then, though more out of apathy than “Oh my God, this sucks” revulsion.

    Didn’t it have two existential crises in the early 80’s and then the early 90’s, and then went through a sort of renaissance afterwards? Hopefully that will happen again. One thing I hope they don’t do if they’re grasping for ideas is go for ‘internet humor’, like you find in stupid Youtube videos and Adult Swim and such. One, it kind of sucks anyway, and they wouldn’t be good enough at it to even rise to that level.

  52. 52.

    Spaghetti Lee

    There’s 10 drunk/stoned people in the dorm common area watching The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo and providing commentary. Unfortunately, it’s not the amusing kind of drunk commentary.

  54. 54.

    NotMax

    Anyone else remember Charles Rocket torpedoing his career with one ill-timed vocalization?

    Oh, and Franco is still dead.

  55. 55.

    patrick II

    I was watching the Masters today and watched an Exxon/Mobil commercials about how much they support teachers, and especially how important it is for students to learn math and science.

    This is the same company that has spent millions on front operations which push anti-climate change propaganda and misrepresents scientific studies and accuse scientists of distorting their findings for increased funding. The ad makes it seem they are all for science. It irks me to think how ad campaigns can manipulate they reality of who they are.

    I saw in the paper that 78 year old Charles Manson is up for parole. He should put ads on tv saying how he is helping the careers of beautiful young pregnant actresses and perhaps people will believe that too.

  56. 56.

    Joseph Nobles

    @PeakVT: Oh, jeez. If only that didn’t say Fucking, I’d post it on Facebook before I stopped laughing at it. Which isn’t yet.

    But I don’t want to make my mama cry on Easter. I’ll have to make one that says, “I’m Over This Lag.”

  57. 57.

    WyldPirate

    @Little Boots:

    You should take them on a regular basis and maybe seek help for the OCD thing you have going on.

    A nice, stout indica strain, preferably in an edible form, might do wonders for you as well.

  58. 58.

    freelancer

    @Little Boots:

    The dude isn’t Beetlejuice. Plus, at this point, responding to you is only reinforcing your constant pecking of the switch. You are turning BJ into your own personal Skinner Box.

  60. 60.

    GregB

    SNL was so boring I went to the bathroom and took a 20 minute Derb and then flushed twice.

  65. 65.

    Mnemosyne

    I had one of those “only in Los Angeles” dilemmas today: do you tip the bike valet when he brings your bike back to you after you’re done shopping?

    I went with “yes” because it’s rarely incorrect to tip someone, but it was a bit surreal.

  69. 69.

    Uriel

    That even Sofia Vergara’s breasts can not make it watchable. Discuss.

    I don’t understand why you would want us to discuss the sad, sad day when all the earlier foreshadowings of some sort of inherent instability in your obviously tenuous grasp on reality finally blossomed into something so similar to full blown psychosis that your commentary became indistinguishable from the ravings of the basest lunatic, but it’s your call I guess-

  72. 72.

    Yutsano

    @Mnemosyne: I think yes. It’s no different from a car valet. He performed the service, and unless there was a sign specifically saying no tips you did the right thing. Starving actors gotta pay rent too you know. :)

  73. 73.

    wasabi gasp

    @SatanicPanic: Eddie Murphy had something special. Like he was being there. In the moment. A hungry young comedian who just tuned in and channeled it.

    I hardly catch the show anymore – and this probably doesn’t speak well of the show as a whole – but when I do, Alec Baldwin is the one doing it for me.

  74. 74.

    FlipYrWhig

    By far the worst musical guest to ever appear on the show. Lana Del Rey was appallingly bad. Those twerps were horrifying. Can’t sing, can’t dance, no charisma, what the fuck was that?

  78. 78.

    Atticus Dogsbody

    Don’t masturbate during the day, you find that you’ll be able to better maintain your interest in breasts during the evening.

  79. 79.

    FlipYrWhig

    SNL is always much worse than you remember it to be, and then when you watch old ones, you realize that it was pretty bad even then. It’s kind of like Democrats. They always seem like they must have been better 20 years ago.

  80. 80.

    wasabi gasp

    @FlipYrWhig: At least that Simpson girl can dance, amirite?

    I know this may be just me, but I found watching a human being make those Florence and the Machine noises to be pretty frightening.

  81. 81.

    Little Boots

    @Atticus Dogsbody:

    Lord Tallyrand, Napoleon’s Foreign Minister, insisted that his secretaries masterbate before coming to work, just so they wouldn’t be distracted during work.

    as long as we’re on this subject.

  82. 82.

    freelancer

    @FlipYrWhig:

    Democrats twenty years ago are worthy of romanticizing?

    I was just a kid, but man, none of my progressive heroes are born of that era.

  85. 85.

    Mnemosyne

    @Yutsano:

    Yeah, like I said, it’s hard go wrong by overtipping service workers, so I gave him some cash.

    Though the valets on this side of town tend to be Latino, so probably not an actor. It was more likely a donation towards the business he’s going to open someday. (I almost said “restaurant,” but then decided that would be a little too Brooksian of a stereotype.)

  86. 86.

    Little Boots

    we need a revolution. but we have lost the taste, and even the idea what that means.

  87. 87.

    FlipYrWhig

    @freelancer: No, what I mean is, it always seems like there was a golden age, compared to the shit reality of the present, but there never really was one, and twenty years from now people will be saying that SNL was only good when Taran Killam was on it and the last good Democrat was Obama.

  88. 88.

    FlipYrWhig

    @wasabi gasp: Yeah, I disliked Florence and the Machine too. I normally like The Shins, but they were lousy on the show too. But this was uniquely atrocious. It made me nostalgic for the golden age of boy bands, like 98 Degrees.

  89. 89.

    Little Boots

    incidentally, this is why I like John Cole so much. he has seen the black heart of conservatism. sometimes you have to be it to see it.

    that is why I bother him so much.

  104. 104.

    freelancer

    @Death Panel Truck:

    What’s SNL?

    Really, I only remember it from the ’92, ’96, and 2000 Presidential elections.

    As far as satire goes, Mr. Show slayed more dragons in 4 short seasons.

  105. 105.

    asiangrrlMN

    @Gex: Kinda like me and Salma Hayek.

    @Mnemosyne: That’s my normal response, too. Tip rather than not.

    SNL – I really just prefer to see clips from time to time. I can’t remember ever liking more than three or four skits from any given show.

    @Little Boots: Don’t ever change.

  106. 106.

    El Cid

    Pffft, SNL was only good during 19XX to 19XX when they had XXXXX on and I really liked it. Ever since XXXXX left they’ve gone downhill and sucked.

  108. 108.

    El Cid

    I just watched the episode, and I liked a lot of the skits. Like too much SNL stuff, many go on just way too long. But the Mitt intro was good; I loved “Almost Pizza”, and Drunk Uncle is still a great character. If it hadn’t gone on so long, the Pantene commercial was pretty funny too.

  109. 109.

    RossInDetroit

    Late to the party, and I’m the last guy who should be commenting on television, but there used to be a chance that SNL would surprise you. Every few years it needs to forget what it is and reinvent itself so it’s surprising again. Because when it figures out what it is and just keeps doing that it becomes predictable, which is death for comedy.

  110. 110.

    RossInDetroit

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I can’t remember ever liking more than three or four skits from any given show.

    I’m not a TV watcher but I’ll occasionally sit still for SNL if there’s an interesting musical guest. But unless the show’s a real barn burner that night (rare) I figure I haven’t missed anything if I bail after the first music segment. Usually I’m right.

  111. 111.

    FDRLincoln

    The Mitt Romney stuff was funny, but then I like Jason Sudekis. The rest of the show wasn’t very good this week.

    SNL is erratic. Sometimes good, more often bad…pretty much like any other form of entertainment.

  112. 112.

    Joel

    At its apex, Saturday Night Live might have five watchable sketches in a single episode, and maybe two or three genuinely funny ones. Something like this one, for example. At its worst, which is more often than not, Saturday Night Live scores a zero on both fronts.

    The “worst” of Saturday Night Live covers the late eighties (post Eddie Murphy, before Phil Hartman), the mid nineties (when they had Chris Elliot and Jay Mohr), most of the post-Tina Fey episodes and any episode that featured Chris Kattan in it.

    I would say this is due to other venues pulling away good talent, but that can’t explain all of it. For example, Saturday Night Live was plenty good in the early nineties (Phil Hartman, Mike Myers, Dana Carvey, Chris Farley, etc..) and there was also a proliferation of sketch comedy on the air at the time. Obviously, you’d never expect Saturday Night Live to do anything as edgy as the State, but they were funny at the time, none the less.

    Postscript: I think Chris Rock was so much better post-Saturday Night Live, that I hardly rate his time there (although Nat X and I’m Chillin’ were pretty funny).

  114. 114.

    Bubblegum Tate

    @BigSouthern:

    Norm McDonald was Weekend Update anchor (best to ever do it IMHO)

    Norm MacDonald is fucking hilarious. His Weekend Update run was amazing.

  115. 115.

    CarolDuhart2

    @Yutsano: You know, I agree with you. Saturday nights at 11:30 just doesn’t have the same spark as back when the choices were between it and some 1930’s comedy or a test pattern. Back then you could get the absolute best talent always. Nowadays, between re-runs, Comedy Central, and podcasts, it just doesn’t have that top of the mountain talent and edge.

    So let SNL go out on a high note and towards that eternal life of DVD box sets instead. Of course, what would replace SNL is anybody’s guess, and it’s become a habit for many. But it won’t be stale, whatever it is.

  117. 117.

    Milwauken

    @Bubblegum Tate:

    Norm was hilarious. Once he apologized for describing Michael Jackson a pedophile, “when what I should have said was ‘a homosexual pedophile. Michael Jackson is a homosexual pedophile. Weekend Update apologizes for the error.”

  118. 118.

    priscianusjr

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    SNL seems to me to have really fallen off a cliff since Amy Poehler left. . . .I do like the guy they have doing Mitt Romney. “America looked at our campaign and said, “Eh, okay””

    Saturday Night Live has been “falling off a cliff” for the last 30 years. But thanks for the tip about the Mitt Romney guy, whose name, as I found out, is Jason Sudeikis. I thought that was really funny — up to the standard of The Daily Show or Colbert.

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