Christ mambo-dancing buff-carpenter Jesus. What an eejit the Romney is.
The EXCLUSIVE – Romney on Debates: Obama Will ‘Say Things That Aren’t True’ interview with George Aloysius Snuffleupagus is compelling viewing in the same way as is, say, America’s Funniest Home Videos.
There you have babies doing themselves injuries on glass coffee tables or bonking themselves in the eyes with sporks, accompanied by whacky boing noises and a laugh track, which you must admit is prime entertainment.
Over at the ABC, it’s very much the same – George tottering toward the fragile coffee table of journalistic integrity with a determined look*, while the Romney spouts inanities and calumnies, in between bouts of bashing itself very hard over its own head with, in turn, a natty white picnic chair, an ornamental plant and George’s left shoe, with a soundtrack of wingnut tears and Rush-Limbaugh-clutching-at-his-heart noises.
It defies belief. You must go and read/watch the whole thing. I suspect the lefty blogs will be all over it like nuns on a chip, so I’m just going to pick out a few of my favourite bits from George’s blogpost, rather than even trying to lampoon the entire thing…
The former governor told me he’s tempted to use Ronald Reagan’s famous line against President Carter in a 1980 debate, “There you go again” — the same line that Bill Clinton turned on Romney and the Republicans at the Democratic convention in Charlotte.
Do it, Mitt. Try and crack a snappy one liner that only non-Zombie Reagan could get away with, and which only Former President Bubba O’Bill could get away with recycling. Wait for some opportune moment, perhaps when President Obama has said something entirely true and innocuous about Obamacare giving people access to affordable healthcare. When you see your moment, do that smug, stiff turn-to-camera face you always use when you’re about to deliver a quip, and drop it in.
“There you go again.”
Try not to say “nigger” or “boy” or “darkie” at the end of that sentence, by the way. None of those would go down well. Then do your odd little laugh, smirk, cut, print. It will be a hit.
Obama will stagger under the force of your wit and babble incoherently (rather than, say, calmly ripping you a new arsehole in front of the entire world), and the Oval Office will be yours.
Romney told me the debates “may well be” the campaign’s make or break moment.
“Sometimes there’s something big that happens and they become deciding. Other times, it’s like, well, nothing really changed. We’re in the same spot we were before the debates. I can’t predict what’ll happen. But I think it’ll be revealing one way or the other,” he said.
The debates will either be decisive or indecisive, but will be revealing one way or the other.
Um.
Moving on.
“Well you know, beating an incumbent is never easy. The president exudes an air of likability and friendliness, which is endearing,” Romney told me.
It’s like an aerophobic Trobirand islander talking about snow.
The vocabulary may be there, but when Mitt says words like “friendliness” or “endearing” he… well, he thinks those things are something you exude, as if they are produced in android nice-glands somewhere beneath the magic undies and then pumped out through ducts in his synthetic skin. Except the whole system is on the fritz.
Democrats say Romney’s plan would cause a $2000 tax hike on the middle class – something Romney disputes and points to a number of studies that say his plan to cut taxes will not increase the deficit, including one by Harvard professor Martin Feldstein.
Feldstein says Romney’s math will work, but he would have to eliminate the home mortgage, charitable, state and local tax deductions for incomes greater than $100,000.
When I pressed Romney on that point, he conceded that he actually hadn’t read the Feldstein report that he and Paul Ryan cite on the campaign trail.
“I haven’t seen his precise study,” he said.
Mitt is, at core, a senior businessman. Indeed, a Chairman, CEO, and Sole Shareholder.
This – for those of you lucky enough never to have worked in a company run by a Romney – means that for the last thirty years, Mitt has not needed to read stuff.
It means that Mitt has risen high above the level in the company (and, I suspect, the campaign) where the actual work is done, where people read studies and analyse data, and occasionally attempt to craft (more or less) convincing narratives. These workers – who are called Associates, or Vice Presidents when the company wants them to think they are important – these actual workers write memos.
These memos are summarised into less and shorter memos by people slightly more senior, then less and shorter and more senior still, until there is a single memo addressed to Mitt, which is slipped onto his desk by his secretary and which says “tax cuts good, not deficit raise, economists say yes, yay olympics”.
Mitt will stick that memo into his slimline briefcase amongst dozens of other memos and gant charts and gender diversity policies that he will also never read, and which will all be thrown away unread a month from now when Mitt forgets his security pass and spills his decaf mocha full fat grande latte into the briefcase while trying to press the alarm button in the lift.
Chairman, CEO, and Sole Shareholderers also don’t have to answer questions very often, and certainly not outside friendly board meetings or corporate bumph videos. Mitt has spent the last thirty years having people say yes to him while he’s lying face down in a corporate trough like Ayn Rand at an all-you-can-scoff bourbon and bullshit buffet.
Now, apparently, some of the ladies and gentlemen of the media, and the President of the United Fucking States would like to ask Mitt some questions about stuff that he didn’t read.
The next few weeks are not going to be pretty, boys and girls.
Number one, reduce tax burdens on middle-income people. So no one can say my plan is going to raise taxes on middle-income people, because principle number one is keep the burden down on middle-income taxpayers,” he said.
Romney defined middle income as $200,000 to $250,000 a year and less.
Editor’s note: This blog has been updated to reflect that in responding to a question from ABC’s George Stephanopoulos, Mitt Romney defined middle income for Americans as $200,000-$250,000 and less.
“Number two, don’t reduce the share of taxes paid by the wealthiest. The top 5 percent will still pay the same share of taxes they pay today. That’s principle one, principle two. Principle three is create incentives for growth, make it easier for businesses to start and to add jobs. And finally, simplify the code, make it easier for people to pay their taxes than the way they have to now,” he said.
When I asked if he and his running mate, Rep. Paul Ryan, would specify which loopholes they would close in order to pay for the tax cuts, Romney said he’s relying on his experience as Massachusetts governor.
Nice editor’s note. I give it ten minutes into the first debate before the new arsehole ripping begins. Five more minutes until Romney begins to shudder and fizz, and three or four after that until smoke comes out and a tiny autistic alien being escapes from Mitt’s head on a little ejector seat.
[Image: Martin H. Simon/ABC. Unless ABC would like me to take it down, in which case I apologise unreservedly and beg to be excused so I can fix that right now. And sorry about the note immediately below this.]* Over at Cole’s comment thread, which contains much win, commenter lonesomerobot notes the following:
Wow Snuffalufagous, really?
a tough stand-in for a president who basically lies in debates.
So, are you going to put that in quotes or something? Or is that just your way – repeating something your interview subject said without adding any clarity?
Rhetorical, I already know the damn answer.
eyelessgame
“Number two, don’t reduce the share of taxes paid by the wealthiest. The top 5 percent will still pay the same share of taxes they pay today.”
You notice the bait-and-switch, right? Gone is the claim that it’s revenue-neutral.
Hint: An across-the-board tax cut of the same percentage to everybody will mean everyone winds up paying exactly the same *share of taxes* as they were paying before.
By saying the wealthy are only going to be paying the same share they’re paying today, when everyone gets the same across-the-board rate decrease *and* the wealthy lose some deductions, is exactly the same as saying the rich are going to get richer.
trollhattan
Have come to believe Willard’s best strategy now to November is to go into hiding.
PaulW
What this represents are two concepts:
1) Romney is getting out ahead of the debates in an attempt to “game the refs” as it were, trying to get the media and/or attentive voters to accept this meme of Obama being a “liar”.
2) Romney genuinely exists in this fantasy world where he is ALWAYS RIGHT and really winning this thing (just remember that smug smirk as he walked away from the podium two days ago: that was the expression of a man who thought he had won this game), and Obama and his supporters are always lying.
Either concept ought to make common-sense people disgusted with Romney. I hope to God they are.
beltane
I really did not want to watch this interview but you’ve done a good job of persuading me. If Romney does decide to go with the “there you go again” approach, the president may have no recourse other than to laugh in his unworthy opponent’s face, thus causing Mittbot’s operating system to crash.
My neighbors used to have a Ronald Reagan dog toy that squeaked when their golden retriever caught it. This chewed up dog toy had more heart, soul, judgment, and integrity than Mitt Romney can every hope to possess. To call Mitt an empty suit is an insult to the vacuum of space; Mitt is more anti-matter than empty space.
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
@trollhattan:
__
As I said last night, the poor Republicans spent decades diligently training the press corps to be nothing but stenographers, and then picked a candidate so tin-eared that all you have to do to make him look bad is to stick a microphone in his face and let it run. Fucking strategy, how does it work?
Jill
Have to say, Romney is a bit clever at the end. He ends the interviewing saying
“… I’m going up against someone who’s been in office for four years and whose record, as you pointed out from the beginning is really pretty bad….”
From the transcript I read, Stephanopoulous never personally made that point, Romney put those words in his mouth, and George doesn’t dispute it.
Chris
Depends on the audience. Half of his base would love it and the other half would “oh but LIBERALS are always RACIST towards whites and Christians and no one ever SAYS anything about it so it’s NOT FAIR that you’re objecting to THIS!”
comrade scott's agenda of rage
The guy really is a dick. He simply can’t seem to ever turn off the dickitude. Ever. It’s impressive in a dicktastic kinda way.
Lurking Canadian
Romney might be literally insane. He seems to live in a different reality than everybody else.
Richard
As I stated on the previous thread, it really sounds like he is going to try and do a Clint Eastwood and pretend that he’s debating an empty chair.
Somehow, I don’t think it’s going to work.
Xecky Gilchrist
@PaulW: (just remember that smug smirk as he walked away from the podium two days ago: that was the expression of a man who thought he had won this game)
Totally. I imagined the thought balloon with “Check and MATE!” hovering there (and somehow thought of the voice of Comic Book Guy.)
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
@PaulW:
__
He’s gaming the wrong refs. These days more low-info voters get their impressions of debates from the Saturday Night Live parody version than from the real thing. Rule #1 is don’t say anything that late night comedy writers can easily turn into parody. Rule #2 is try to get your opponent to break Rule #1. How does framing Obama as a liar turn into comedy gold? Natgannahappen.
Villago Delenda Est
Yes, things like:
“Mitt Romney is fully prepared to handle our relations with the rest of the world”
“Mitt Romney will think about all Americans when he finally unveils whatever policies he plans on implementing”
“Mitt Romney is the kindest, warmest, bravest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.”
jwb
@PaulW: Well, Mittwit probably only reads Rassmussen polls, which has now gone to sampling only Fox News voters in order to show Mittwit in the lead.
Dennis SGMM
Sarah,
Another masterpiece. I do wonder why Romney may choose the “There you go again,” line when he could so easily adopt “Fifty-four forty or fight,” or “Remember the Maine.”
eric
The truly interesting dynamic will be Romney trying to act like the only alpha male on stage. My guess is that he will so aggravate women voters he will get lowest percentage of female voters since Lincoln.
TooManyJens
Trying to figure out what this might mean will be my entertainment for the long meeting I have coming up.
I’m not sure which is worse, honestly — Mitt saying that middle income is $250K and below, or saying that $100K is not middle income. What does he think it is, exactly?
Tom Ames
I’m starting to think that Romney is a psychopath, in the clinical sense of the word. He clearly lacks any empathy (as shown by his high-school bullying, his dismissal of the concerns of the hospitalized mom, his ability to casually lay off factories full of workers, and even his treatment of his dog). He is narcissistic beyond belief (Winter Olympics tschotsckes emblazoned with his face) and will lie without hesitation.
We don’t necessarily need someone who is all warmth and fuzzinsess in the White House, as difficult decisions often need to be made.
But this guy is worse than LBJ and Nixon combined. He’s at the Putin level of psychopathy.
jibeaux
@Lurking Canadian: Oh, we just call them Republicans here.
dmsilev
Promise us you’ll never change.
Death Panel Truck
@beltane:
The wooden Indian my brother David and I stole from outside a cigar store on Fruitvale Boulevard in Yakima, Washington in the summer of 1979 had more charisma than Willard.
eric
@TooManyJens: $100,000 is not middle income it is a week in monte carlo.
beltane
LOL, the headlines of Comcast News for Dummies is all about Mitt’s “$250,000 is middle income” gaffe (not really a gaffe from Mitt’s perspective). If the Mitt interview is like AFV it’s more like those clips featuring a puppy chasing its own tail.
Monkey Business
Mr. President, please plant a size twelve and a half black patent leather cap toe in Mitt Romney’s sorry ass.
Then grab the mic and ask America if they can SMEEEEEEEEEEELELELELELELELELELELEL! WHAT BARACK! IS COOKIN!
Followed by ripping your shirt in half to reveal another shirt that says “I BRING IT”.
Just a suggestion.
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@Dennis SGMM:
Thankyou, dear.
I hope you might feel ok sometime soon. Or at least feel like you might feel ok sometime soon. xx
{That made more sense in my head}
c u n d gulag
Someone needs to punch his teeth in, break his jaw, and get it wired shut, to keep him from talking – and then blame it on some violent Liberal.
This will effectively keep him from putting his platinum foot in his mouth, and maybe generate some sympathy for the Mittster.
What a DICK!!!
Villago Delenda Est
@ThatLeftTurnInABQ:
Who got mocked in the last election cycle?
“John, can I call you a cab?”
“Mr. Puddles? I’ve got snausages for you, Mr. Puddles.”
“I can see Russia from my house!”
“Now it’s time for some fancy pageant walking”
We’ve seen how well you do when you’re exclusively the objects of mocking by late night TV comedians, Jon Stewart, and the SNL crew…
dmsilev
@TooManyJens:
Remember, this is the guy who once declared that $360K in speaking-fee income was “not very much money”. $250K is poor to him.
KG
@Chris: and the other 63% of the population would vote for anyone not named Mitt Romney
schrodinger's cat
@eric: Is it OK for Mormons to gamble?
BTW why are they sitting in those uncomfortable looking chairs?
MattR
While John is right that this take brass ones to attempt, it is also the only real choice that Romney has. When your campaign is built on statements that range from obfuscation to outright lying and the media is starting to pick up on that fact, the only choice you have is to try and preempt that by pushing the idea that the other side is the one that is loose with the truth.
Frankensteinbeck
I’m starting to think you’re right. Someone on his staff has told him that he’s only a couple of percentage points behind in national polling and since Obama can’t speak without a teleprompter, Romney just has to blow him away in the debates to clinch this thing. He believes he just has to use the skills he brings to business meetings.
Dennis SGMM
@Sarah, Proud and Tall:
Thank you.
This old heart of mine been broke a thousand times. I’ll be okay, just a little bit older and a little bit slower.
jl
A person has to know when to use schtick like ‘there you go again’. you have to put them in after your opponent says something that you are pretty sure the audience does not agree with, and does not contain a good score against you. Otherwise it could sound like you are reinforcing your opponents good point and backfire on you. it will come off like Putin’s “ah, you have scored a point” (by pointing out that if do that, I will end up like GW Bush).
You have to be a gifted politician, say, like Reagan or Bill Clinton.
So, surely nothing could go wrong with Romney over scheming how he is going to throw ‘there you go again’s all over the place like confetti and really show that inept Obama who’s presidential.
Richard
With every statement and interview, he seems less human.
jibeaux
@trollhattan: He’d probably gain ground by pretending to have the flu for a week or two.
trollhattan
Priorities, Willard haz them.
H/T TBogg
http://tbogg.firedoglake.com/2012/09/14/mitt-romneys-war-on-fap-americans/
Roger Moore
This reminds me of the joke about how information gets changed as it moves up the ladder. The engineers at the bottom say something is a pile of crap and stinks to high heaven. Each level of management uses more polite euphemisms (shit, manure, fertilizer, etc.) that gradually change the meaning until upper management is convinced that it’s the greatest thing since sliced bread.
ETA: Here’s the one:
jl
@Villago Delenda Est:
Thanks for that pro tip, which I will remember when I run for president.
An SNL or DS skit with robotic Romney taglines inserted in all the wrong places might be funny.
Villago Delenda Est
Sorry for the multiples. Our reliable friend, FYWP, strikes AGAIN!
KG
anyone know what’s going on in Missouri? Just looked at the polls since August 20, they go like this:
Romney +10
Obama +1
Romney +7
Romney +17
Romney +12
Romney +3
that last +3 is Rassmussen and dated 9/11… just seems weird to see things all over the place like that.
Yutsano
@schrodinger’s cat: Apparently it’s okay for Mormons to own ca$inos, as witnessed by their church.
trollhattan
@beltane:
To be fair, $250k wouldn’t go far in La Jolla, site of Casa Romney #? and the future car elevator.
Triassic Sands
Stretching the truth is common in political campaigns. Candidates frequently spin things to wring every ounce of benefit possible out of statistics and past events. However, in Romney’s case (and also with Ryan) there seems to be more and bigger just plain lies being told than I remember hearing in any other political campaign.
Of course, I’m biased, and fact-checkers are unreliable judges of political truth, but the R-boys really do seem to depend on lies more than even George W did. This raises (not “begs,” but raises) the question, Are these guys aware that they are lying or do they really believe what they’re saying, even though a simple review of facts would reveal their dishonesty?
Lying has been such an integral part of Romney’s political life, often necessitated by his willingness to completely change his position on important issues that I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a psychological mechanism that adjusts and readjusts the truth in his mind as needed.
Another curious point is that for someone who resorts to lies, even ridiculous, easily disproved lies, Romney is not a particularly skilled liar. His lies are obvious and rarely hidden beneath distracting or misleading verbiage. He just comes right out and says something that is obviously untrue and expects everyone to accept his statement as if he were Joseph Smith explaining what happened to those pesky golden tablets.
So. Question 1: is Romney aware he’s lying or has he become more skilled at lying to himself than he is at lying to us?
Question 2: Why, with all his practice, is Romney such a poor liar?
trollhattan
@jl:
RIP Phil Hartman, who would have been a profoundly deadly WillardBot12.
catclub
@Dennis SGMM: How about:
“Don’t lie until you see the whites of their eyes.”
Death Panel Truck
“@jl:
Willard thinks all he has to do is mock Obama and repeatedly call him a liar, and he’s got this thing locked up. “Facts? I don’t need no stinkin’ facts!”
jl
@Roger Moore:
“This design stinks like fresh crap stuck on your shoe” is transformed into “The design makes a strong impression”
I can see that happening to information in the Romney camp.
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@Villago Delenda Est:
I think I got them all. FYWPYFF.
beltane
@trollhattan: Mitt Romney is as familiar with the way of life of ordinary Americans as he is with the folklore of Tajikistan. The MSM used to call Obama “exotic”; to Mitt Romney, it is America itself that is exotic.
Napoleon
Awesome, Kansas has now asked for Obama’s birth certificate:
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/09/15/us/politics/kansas-election-officials-seek-copy-of-obamas-birth-certificate.html?hp
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@Roger Moore:
Nice.
Dennis SGMM
@Roger Moore:
Back in the day I was working in software dev for a large ISP. They paid a couple of mil for a piece of software that was supposed to auto-update our customers’ browsers to our latest and greatest offerings. The only problem was that the software caused every UNIX box we put it on to core dump. The answer to that from on high was that we had to fix it.
Citizen_X
Dude: not everybody can cover Freebird. Don’t even try.
I read his comment as a notice that, “If I go down in flames at the debate, we will deny it utterly.” So the orchestra can be playing Nearer My God to Thee, the deck can be listing thirty degrees, and Mitt will still be insisting that everything’s fine.
jl
@trollhattan: Hartman would be awesome. Dan Aykroyd is still around and would be good, but I don;t think he has kept himself in good enough shape to be a good Romney.
jibeaux
@Citizen_X: That would be a good song for the campaign events, actually. Religious, and in the public domain so no more angry press releases from bands telling him to fuck off.
trollhattan
@Citizen_X:
Fxt for greater Willard accuracy.
Villago Delenda Est
@Sarah, Proud and Tall:
Thank you ma’am. You’ve been missed.
@dmsilev:
What this guy said about our Sarah.
LanceThruster
I hope to see this exchange at some point.
PRESIDENT OBAMA [looking exasperated] – Maybe I’ll just use that thick skull of yours as a batterin’ ram, Romney.
ROMNEY [with trademark clueless grin] – Why, my head would just squash like an eggplant, Mr. President.
jl
@Citizen_X:
” The debates will either be decisive or indecisive, but will be revealing one way or the other. ”
translation
” If you shlubs don’t praise me the skies, I’m going to work on you chumps with a hypersonic centrifuge and spin you until you can’t stand up no more.”
Villago Delenda Est
@Napoleon:
I followed your link, and an ad popped up that warned me about the three warning signs of dementia.
I’m sure one of them is “you question Barack Obama’s eligibility to be President.”
IowaOldLady
I think Romney believes his own spin. I can’t decide if that’s more or less scary than it would be if he knew he was lying.
g
Seriously, WTF? I’ve read other stories that discuss Romney’s very peculiar approach to RAISING expectations for his performance in the debate, but this is just…er…stupid, tactically.
“Lemme tell you the kind of zingers I’m gonna pull on that guy!”
Christ! you don’t give away the punchline ahead of time.
Everyone knows that it’s better to lower expectations than to raise them. Is it that Romney’s ego won’t let him stop crowing about himself, or is that he’s just stupid?
Calouste
@Tom Ames:
Romney is quite a few levels ahead of Putin in psychopathy.
Putin has admitted that his photo ops were staged, that one of the purposes of them was to bring attention to endangered animals, he did that in an interview with a journalist who has written a critical book about him and his spokesman confirmed the truth of the interview.
Which of those four things can you see Romney do, or even getting close to doing?
trollhattan
@jl: Ackroyd owned Nixon and Carter (remember the Carter call-in show when he talked the kid down from a bad acid trip?) while Hartman owned Reagan and Clinton. His final SNL episode, they let him loose with Clinton, which was so good it had me squirming.
He’d have captured Willard’s repellant haughtyness (izzat a word?) and stiff physicality. No comedian comes to mind as a substitute, but then I didn’t imagine Julianne Moore would be so stupendous as Palin.
Richard
@trollhattan:
You know, come to think of it, every time Mitt opens his mouth, he sounds more and more like that Italian cruise ship captain who ran his boat aground.
LanceThruster
@Dennis SGMM:
I vote for “Tippecanoe and Mittens too!”
roc
@Triassic Sands:
One, he’s never had to actually convince anyone with his lies. He’s always been in charge. So what the audience thought of his BS would have had no bearing on whether he could go on to do whatever he wanted anyway.
You can see in his demeanor that even being *asked* about his statements, for clarification, let alone challenged on content, hits him like an insult. He’s never had to do more than deliver the fiction with an authoritative tone and a pleasant smile.
The only convincing he would need to do, would have been done “in quiet rooms” with perhaps some reticent board-member who could be individually reminded, by Romney and by his peers, out of earshot of the plebes, that he was not in the same boat as those on the shop floor and was about to make a shit-ton of money.
Secondly, consistency would also never have been stressed: getting caught in a lie would also have had no impact on whether he’d get to do what he wanted to do in the first place.
The lies themselves would be like smalltalk. You just say them to the assembled masses because people expect you to say *something*. So whatever convinces them to keep doing what they need to be doing to avoid a disruption is just fine.
Chris
@Triassic Sands:
I think movement conservatives have lived in their own bubble for so long that even if they’re vaguely aware that they’re not being honest, they couldn’t tell the difference anymore if they tried. And don’t forget the “we create our own reality folks.” It’s been in the works since the rise of talk radio and the conservative takeover of the party in 1994.
(Partly related: when was the first time conservatives took over the Republican Party? Not this generation, but the first one, before FDR. Was it the ditching of the Radical Republicans at the end of Reconstruction? Even sooner? The Gilded Age party definitely wasn’t Lincoln’s).
Villago Delenda Est
@Monkey Business:
“Excuse me while I whip this out…”
TG Chicago
So “middle income” is everybody in the bottom 95%? That’s a hell of a case of gastritis Romney’s got.
On the plus side, this means he has devised a plan to eliminate poverty in America! Now they’re all middle income!
LanceThruster
@trollhattan:
They could just put a new faceplate (a la “Westworld”) on Disney’s old animatronic Lincoln and have a pretty believable effect.
The Moar You Know
I’m forced to continually downgrade my estimate of Mitt’s intelligence. The man’s an imbecile.
jl
@g:
” you don’t give away the punchline ahead of time. ”
Romney seems to think that if you explain the joke before you tell it, it just has to work.
When he talks in front of an audience, to me, there are similarities between Romney and a really bad, and clueless, stand up comic.
He delivers the line, it bombs, you can see him thinking “well, my writers told me that one would work”, then trying to convince himself it worked, and then plunging into the next bomb.
Edit: for slogan, how about “In your heart, you know he’s tight”
cckids
@Lurking Canadian:
I think its the combo of 1) really really rich, you are in your own little world, with rules for others, not for you; 2) Mormon, which again, is very insulating & reality denying; and 3) Republican, which comes with a double-strength reality impervious bubble barrier, your own TV network to spin your version of the world & an army of like-minded minions.
Romney is like the perfect storm, his campaign may open a vortex to some parallel reality.
Yutsano
@Napoleon: Yay! Moar juicy birfer goodness!!
Chris
@Triassic Sands:
To this question – again “living in a conservative bubble” is part of the answer. He doesn’t have to convince these people of anything; fuck, most of his base lapped up the “Obama apologized to the terrorists!” shit and still does even days after it’s been debunked.
The other part is that lying successfully takes lots of practice and, like any other skill, you have to learn what works and what doesn’t. Since Romney’s ego can’t handle being told what doesn’t work, he’s incapable of learning from his mistakes.
trollhattan
@The Moar You Know:
Willard, to self, tonight: “Okay, I’ve got the Reagan line down cold. Next, ‘I knew Jack Kennedy, Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine and senator, you’re no Jack Kennedy.’ Yeah, I’ll use that one too. I’m so going to kill in these debates!”
IowaOldLady
@The Moar You Know: He is startlingly stupid. How does someone get through grad degrees at Harvard with that kind of superficial scratching at the surface of reality?
Villago Delenda Est
@g:
Both, I think.
As I’ve indicated before, not only does Rmoney not know his adversary (Obama), he doesn’t know himself.
Sun Tzu would have teaching points for months with OvenMitt.
Richard
@Chris:
These folks remind me of creationists, who justify being “liars for Christ” by convincing themselves that, by lying and distorting, they are somehow serving a higher “truth”.
Roger Moore
@trollhattan:
Sorry, but Mitt is chained to the mast. If the SS Republicans goes down in 2012, he’s going down with it.
beltane
@Calouste: I don’t think Putin is an actual psychopath. A brutal strongman, yes; a psychopath, no. He seems to be too self-aware to fit that definition.
One of my favorite Putin stories concerns his dog. He used to brag about how tough his dog was and how it was an absolute vicious beast compared to Bush’s Barney. Turns out that Putin’s dog was not a pitbull, a Rottweiler, a mastiff, or any other breed known for ferocity, but was instead a very sweet-faced Labrador retriever whose soft mouth couldn’t do much damage even if it wanted to. As far as dictatorial leaders go, Putin’s sense of humor is better than most.
Romney is truly a freak, a man who has never once set foot in the real world.
JustAnotherBob
@eric:
$100,000 is a week’s required contribution to the Mormon Church, Inc. in Mitt’s household.
He grimaces when forced write the check, he reports…
Chris
@The Moar You Know:
That quote about using “there you go again” made me think of a line from Richard Wright in “Black Boy” when he talks about the Communist Party – he says that the local CP is essentially practicing a superstitious ritual, assuming that they can repeat the results that the Leninists achieved in Russia simply by dressing the same way, reading the same books, and reciting the same things they said.
(That entire part of the book, when he’s describing the Communists and how fucking deluded they are, comes to mind frequently when looking at the modern GOP, actually).
Villago Delenda Est
@LanceThruster:
“Ma, ma, where’s my pa?
Can’t find his own ass ha ha ha!”
Roger Moore
@jl:
Something tells me his comedic timing is going to be absolutely abysmal. He may well try to use that line, but he’ll use it after Obama says something completely bland and non-controversial and then be surprised when it utterly fails to wow anyone.
schrodinger's cat
@Tom Ames: I don’t know much about Putin’s childhood, but was he born with a silver spoon in his mouth like Mittens? Mittens is not smart enough to be Putin.
beltane
@schrodinger’s cat: The last Russian leader who was stupid and entitled as Mitt was Nicholas II, another loving husband and father who couldn’t find a clue if his life depended on it. And we all know how well that turned out.
trollhattan
@Roger Moore:
Do you suppose he’s enough “one of them” to go down with them? I’ve never thought of Willard as a Republican Party insider so much as somebody who’s continually floating in on the grand Zeppelin of Willard’s cash and ego, tugging at their sleeves and pestering them to give him a turn.
In my estimation, he’ll unmoor the first Wednesday of November, make a note to self that he had poor campaign support, and go figure out how to turn his money into more money. They’ll blame him, but he’ll go full honey badger on them and not give a shit.
They do so deserve one another.
NonyNony
@Triassic Sands:
Is he lying? Or is he ‘spinning’? Or is to ‘brand management’? It isn’t a lie if you can use a euphemism to describe it!
Because he comes from a culture where nobody calls him on his lies. Seriously – his children won’t call him out for lying to him, nor will his wife. The people he employs won’t call him out on it. And the people who hire him would have to get into a lawsuit to call him on his lies and it isn’t worth it.
This isn’t even typical “Fox New tea party bubble” garbage. This is a top-level CEO who runs his family like an authoritarian douchenozzle bubble. Whether he believes his own lies or not is completely irrelevant because if he says the sky is orange and grass is purple as Patriarch of his family and God-king of his corporation, his “people” are supposed to just agree with him. And any outsiders can either agree with him or face his wrath.
What we’re seeing here is what we sometimes see when corporate executives decide to run for office. They come from a culture of feudalism[*] and this “democracy” stuff is hard for them to adjust to.
[*] Feudalism where knights and siege engines have been replaced by lawyers and contracts, and where feudal obligations have been formalized into management hierarchies and employment contracts instead of oaths of obedience, but more feudal than democratic.
trollhattan
@beltane:
Pretty sure Putin’s directly responsible for the death of a whole lot of Russian journalists.
Roger Moore
@Dennis SGMM:
I like
IkeMitt.Return to normalcy.
It’s the economy, stupid.
Darkrose
Romney went on to say, “Of course, he’d be even more likeable if he danced–maybe tap dancing–and sang a little, maybe. Those people are so talented, you know.”
JustAnotherBob
@roc:
This. Truth.
Sister Rail Gun of Warm Humanitarianism
We heard this on an NPR report early this afternoon. I thought my hubby was going to drive off the road, he was ranting so hard.
I have never seen him this pissed during an election. I blame Fark.
Roger Moore
@trollhattan:
I don’t think Mitt is going down with the ship because he’s personally committed and dedicated; he’ll go down to the ship because a modern Presidential candidate can’t escape the ship no matter how hard he tries. He’s either locked on the bridge or mounted on the bow as a figurehead, depending on his personal role in the party. He may know that the ship is sinking and desire desperately to escape, but it’s just not possible to do so. He’ll be arguing that he’s actually on a lifeboat the whole ride down to Davy Jones’ Locker.
Darkrose
@Monkey Business: I’m want “Mitt…there are white folks, and then there are ignorant motherfuckers like you.”
Felinious Wench
@jl:
Alec Baldwin could do a dead-on impression of Romney if they can get him to do it.
LanceThruster
@Darkrose:
Best followed by a friendly and magnanimous pat upon the head.
trollhattan
@Roger Moore:
FWIW I prefer your outcome to mine. :-)
beltane
@trollhattan: I don’t think he’s a nice person or a humane leader but that does not mean he is mentally ill in any way. Romney is just not right in the head.
JustAnotherBob
@Roger Moore:
Romney is more likely the final, necessary hole in the hull required to sink the SS Republican Party.
If he does as poorly as it appears he will the corporate wing will have to hire salvage divers to retrieve the remains and haul them into dry dock for a rebuild.
The future Republican party almost has to be a reformulation built on pro-business and slow cultural change with all the ‘hate people different than you’ left behind. They’re going to have to find a possible majority from more conservative people from all ethnic/racial/sexual orientation groups and try to ignore the party crazies.
Do that, and do it with an attitude of compromise and fixing problems, and the country will be fine. Nothing wrong with one party bringing most of the new ideas and the other party working to make sure the dreams are reasonable and the route well-chosen.
LanceThruster
@jl:
Out of curiosity, what sort of campaigner was his father?
trollhattan
@Felinious Wench:
Hmm, I think that could work. And he can basically stay in character from “30 Rock.”
I’m convinced Tina Fey cost McCain/Palin a million votes.
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@roc:
What you said.
trollhattan
@beltane:
I’ll grant that. Putin’s politics are an extension of his KGB past. Just better bennies.
Canuckistanian
Dennis, if he started chirping “54-40 or fight” that would be a declaration of war with Canada. And last time the US decided to try to bag our lands up to 54-40 it didn’t work out so well for y’all.
Xecky Gilchrist
he’s tempted to use Ronald Reagan’s famous line against President Carter in a 1980 debate, “There you go again”
This is just SO cargo-cult.
Frankensteinbeck
@trollhattan:
I think Putin is much more a candidate for socio- or psychopathy here. Guilt and social anxiety are weaknesses experienced by other people. He does whatever it takes to get what he wants and shows no sign of being bothered by it at all. Romney is just an out of touch callous moron who thinks poor people should hire a better accountant.
gene108
You know, one thing I realized, back in the 2000 election is the October 2000 attack on the USS Cole probably cost Al Gore a lot of votes.
It helped feed the notion that Clinton and by inference Gore were weak on national defense.
I have a feeling Republicans are secretly hoping for the same type of blow back with these bombings.
Outside of the right-wing media sphere, though, there’s very little traction about this being evidence of Obama’s weakness.
FormerSwingVoter
@The Moar You Know: Mitt Romney is actually dumber than Sarah Palin – it just doesn’t seem as blatant because Daddy paid for a top-tier education for him.
Bill Arnold
@Felinious Wench:
Alec Baldwin is heavily associated with WNYC (NPR New York City), doing a line of humorous (or irritating) fundraiser spots and a regular podcast. Great voice.
So him doing a Romney impression might be doable.
Felinious Wench
@trollhattan:
Yep, agree. She was devastatingly good as Palin.
I’m planning on watching The Daily Show every night until the election, just to see the joy on Jon Stewart’s face. He was incandescent over Clint Eastwood’s appearance at the RNC.
gene108
@JustAnotherBob:
He’ll have to do worse than Mondale in 1984 for their to be any shock to the system, followed up by a 2016 campaign, where conservative becomes a dirty word, like liberal became in 1988.
I don’t see the left having the media resources to pull it off.
LanceThruster
@gene108:
If the GOP is “secretly” hoping for it, Mossad can deliver it.
“False flag, will travel”
Roger Moore
@JustAnotherBob:
No. Romney is the symptom, not the cause, of the Republican problems. He’s only the captain because nobody better was willing to go anywhere near the bridge. All the trained officers are already on lifeboats fleeing the ship, leaving the midshipmen in charge.
LanceThruster
@JustAnotherBob:
It’s one of the amazing aspects of the showdown being depicted as a horserace. At some point in the process, a candidate can be shown to be completely incapable of doing the job, so much so that his or her own party agrees, but since the menu has already gone to the printer, their hands are tied. The money the media generates covering the horserace is contingent on the race being played out to its bitter end. At no point can they say, “Withdraw your incompetent boob and send in a sub.”
How effing stupid is this?
Kodos: It’s true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about it? It’s a two-party system. You have to vote for one of us.
Man 1: He’s right, this is a two-party system.
Man 2: Well I believe I’ll vote for a third-party candidate.
Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.
gogol's wife
@beltane:
No, I’m sorry, Putin is a cold-eyed murderer and has no sense of humor whatsoever. And if Romney is worse than he is, then we are in very grave danger indeed.
SiubhanDuinne
@schrodinger’s cat:
I’ll betcha $10,000 it is.
Liberty60
OT, but has anyone else noticed how insistent the right is now about polls being biased? Not just MSNBC or PPP, but any poll, anywhere, including Fox or WSJ.
Everytime I browse winger sites, they all seem to agree that RMoney is going to win by a landslide.
The prospect of them on Nov. 7th is almost creepy, like the quiet kid who is always picked on, promising to one day “show everybody”.
Chris
@Liberty60:
Polls do tend to be biased, I think, because of who can be readily reached – an immigrant with poor English skills working sixty hours a week to make ends meet is probably less likely to be polled than an upper middle class professional with flawless American English.
Wait. What do you mean, that’s not what they’re complaining about?
ETA: more seriously, there’s just an increasing number of conservatives who distrust the Republican power structure, up to and including Murdoch outlets like Fox and the WSJ. Thirty years of Reaganism in this country haven’t given them what they expected, the years of absolute control of the government at all levels by Bush in the 2000s didn’t give them what they expected, so they’ve gotten more and more paranoid and hysterical in searching out The RINO Traitors Within Who’re Sabotaging Our Glorious Revolution (one of the impulses behind the Tea Party Movement). The revolution’s eating its young; even Roger Ailes isn’t above suspicion anymore.
Mike
Thanks for the heads up, Mitt! We appreciate the advance scouting!
? Martin
I wanna see Romney drop an n-bomb in the debate and have Obama go over and turn his lights out. I would weep with delight.
? Martin
@Liberty60:
“I live in a rather special world. I only know one person who voted for
NixonObama. Where they are I don’t know. They’re outside my ken. But sometimes when I’m in atheaterliquor store I can feel them.”Updated for modern wingnut.
jl
” The revolution’s eating its young; even Roger Ailes isn’t above suspicion anymore. ”
And here I thought Ailes had that big Fox security force and bunker for Islamic and lefty threats. Ailes is crazy, but farsighted and shrewd in his crazy way. I didn’t see that coming, but I guess he did.
Petorado
Obama has been scoring points by telling the public all this trickle down economics has been tried over and over again and has consistently failed in doing what Repubs have said it will do. So now Romney wants to resurrect a stale old quote from the guy who sold us the con in the first place? Plays right into Obama’s hands.
jl
@Petorado:
Can we expected a double ‘there you go again’ moment in the debates? That would be fun.
Then at NRO a very involved Scholastic analysis of how, when Obama ‘there you go again’ed Romney’s ‘there you go again’, Obama was being logically inconsistent and self refuting, and therefore it didn’t count. Even though Obama got big audience laffs out of it? That would be fun too, but some one else would have makes a blog post out of the funny parts, because I would not read the whole thing.
SamR
Obama response: “Oh, are we recycling old quotes now? Well let me paraphrase a famous one. Governor, I didn’t know Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan wasn’t a friend of mine. But Governor, even I know—and even Republicans will agree—that you’re no Ronald Reagan.”
Petorado
@jl:
When Mitt uncorks his mechanical and insincere snark, with bonus smirk, Obama will eat hit lunch — and drink his milkshake.
I’m thinking Biden will recycle his old Rudy G. snap by claiming the Republican solution for everything is “A noun, a verb, and tax cuts.”
Soylent Green
Remarkably, no matter how the debates go or what idiotic things Mitt says between now and the election, he is still going to score about 49 percent of the popular vote.
TooManyJens
@jibeaux:
Then we’d just wonder why he didn’t run his antivirus software.
LanceThruster
@jl:
Rmoney will botched the line and say, “There I go again, also too.”
pete
Obama will win the debates, in part by not seeming to try to humiliate Romney. Mittens will do a valiant job of humiliating himself (and likely not even know it) and Obama will be all, “my opponent is a good person” and “venture capitalists have a role in our society, but Presidents have a broader remit.” This week’s “Gov. Romney seems to have a tendency to shoot first and aim later” was perfect — and I bet it drove Romney near insane. How could that, that, that person condescend to me? While Obama is all “just being helpful” … I’m really looking forward to the debates. They should be a master class in evisceration.
Allan
Tina Fey as Sarah Palin:
“Hey, can I call ya Joe? ‘Cause I practiced a couple zingers where I call ya Joe!”
Gex
You left Mitt a terrible option. He can follow that phrase with “boy.” And if he does, I’ll need a new TV because I will have difficulty not being violent for a moment.
The Other Chuck
@Petorado: Minus the noun and the verb.
Gex
@Gex: I see I have the reading comprehension of a gnat today. Nevermind.
Tom
Ole George probably made avery good contrbution and Mitt accepted the “gentlemen’s Cs” awarded at all the top schools. You would not believe the number of wealthy idiots I have met who graduated from the Harvard Law and Business Schools. Fortunately, the bar exam wbeeds out most of the incompetent lawbs.
W. Kiernan
The debates this year should be very amusing. But you know what would be nice? And by “nice,” I mean a massacre? If, instead of Obama debating Romney and Biden debating Ryan, it were Obama debating Ryan, and Biden debating Romney.
People call Ryan “intelligent,” which is completely absurd right on the face of it, since not only does he say that Ayn Rand is a good writer (thus revealing that he hasn’t read a half-dozen actually good novels in his entire life) but he also refers to Ayn Rand as a philosopher. Good grief! People also claim that he is a “wonk,” which is to say, he can solve arithmetic problems concerning public affairs. Now it’s pretty clear that Obama really is quite intelligent, and surely he’s ten times the “wonk” Ryan ever was. A debate between those two would be the intellectual equivalent of a prize fight between Lennox Lewis and Pee Wee Herman.
Then, having mopped up of the logical side of the election decision, we’d have the face-off where we decide who is the most humane and sympathetic of the candidates. Where decent, big-hearted Joseph Biden goes up against Willard M. Romney. At the very least, it would be Indiana Jones vs. HAL 9000. But if we really got lucky, Smilin’ Joe would provoke Romney so severely that the robot exterior would crack open, revealing the sulfurous contempt, the outright hatred, which Willard so obviously has for us lowly workies. We’ve seen a couple glimpses of it sneak out before – “Corporations are people, my friend,” “I’ll tell you what, ten thousand bucks? Ten thousand dollar bet?,” “I like being able to fire people!” – but we’d all like to see the mask come all the way off.
karen
So Romney is a Dalek! That explains everything!
SiubhanDuinne
@TooManyJens:
Ha!
I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet
@SiubhanDuinne: Oooh. Good catch.
Rick Perry should have known the Mormon rules – he could have had a better comeback and the race might have turned out a little differently…
http://www.lds.org/handbook/handbook-2-administering-the-church/selected-church-policies#21.1.19
Heh.
Cheers,
Scott.
ABL
I’ve only read half of this and it’s already my favorite post ever.
mclaren
@Lurking Canadian:
Narcissistic personality disorder and sociopathy aren’t classified as “insanity,” legally speaking. They’re recognized as mental disorders but paradoxically the patient suffering from them is not technically unaware of the difference between right and wrong. He just doesn’t care.
mclaren
@karen:
He’s a capitalist Dalek. Instead of droning Exterrrrrrminate! he buzzes Exterrrrrrrrminate jobs!
Sarah, Proud and Tall
@ABL:
Hee.
JR in WV
Here’s a comment I saw made in response to an article at the Washington Post, which appears to be abandoning its support of Willard in the wake of its absurd remarks about the murder of our ambassador:
“naksuthin wrote:
I am an independent.
After the 9/11 attacks, America, both Democrats and Republicans and Independents united behind President Bush in unity.
Even though Democrats could have scored points by criticizing and blaming Bush for ignoring the warning signs that an attack on the twin towers was eminent or for allowing the suicide attackers to come to the US and study in flight training schools…
Democrats gave Republican Bush their full support. During those difficult months the Republican’s President’s approval ratings soared to 90%…proof that Democrats were not playing partisan politics when America is attacked and were solidly behind
President Bush..
How different the Republican response to the unwarranted mob attacks on our embassy and the killing of our American Ambassador and three others.
I’ve been listening all day to Governor Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan criticize….not the attackers….but of President Obama.
And just finished listened to Mitt Romney’s foreign policy adviser place blame for the attack on President Obama.
Romney and his spokesperson said little about the unjust attackers and seemed save their venomous attacks for President Obama, who they accused of “sympathizing with the attackers”
That’s pretty sickening.
When America is under attack, you can count on Romney/Ryan to jettison patriotism and unity, to ignore the enemy…and launch an all out war against….. the Democratic President of the United States.
These traitors are no better than those who tear down the walls of our embassy. They make me sick.”
I can’t say it any better than this American voter.
Romney and his pals are no better than common thieves, trying to steal as much power as they can, any way they can. Attacking people who are doing the best job that can be done cleaning up a terrible situation created by Romney’s pals.
Unbelievable, if it wasn’t coming from Willard. Nothing is really unbelievable coming from him and his minions.
Disgusting!
Ruckus
@Roger Moore:
Once in the navy I was told to report to the Captains cabin to move the phone and if I didn’t get there in the next 2 minutes my ass would be fried.
Knocked on the door, get invited in, say hi capt. “What are you doing here?” Came to move the phone, was told it had to be done in the next 2 minutes or my ass was fried. “Unfuckingbelieveable. I told them I needed it moved and it could wait because it is a nothing deal.”
Now on this ship it went like this – Capt – XO- Eng officer – Electrical officer – me. Middle management couldn’t keep a simple order straight through 3 people.
BTW that capt and I got along just fine, unlike the assholes in between us. Only one who treated those who worked for him like they were human.
Ruckus
@The Moar You Know:
The man’s an imbecile.
Imbeciles are gona be mad!
We need to come up with a better reference for mittens. We keep lowering the level but we keep offending people doing that.
I suggest mittens is the foul odor of fresh dog shit that you stepped in in bare feet.
TenguPhule
After a single lesson of trying to teach the Republican party, Sun Tzu would have had both Ryan and Romney’s heads chopped off and then started again with the next two highest courtesans of the GOP, thus assuring their complete attention and utter obedience.
Applejinx
This kept me up last night a while- Obama does in fact have a killer, unanswerable judo move to counter Mitt trying to pull ‘gotchas’ of a personality nature.
All he has to do is go, “Please, Mister Romney- this is serious time. Focus.” like an exasperated teacher to a recalcitrant child.
This totally baits Romney to act worse and is probably one of the things Romney is watching for- any opportunity to grab a Reagan/Carter dynamic and play the folksy charismatic to Obama’s uptight humorless austere-guy.
But there’s a fatal flaw to that response- many, in fact.
Obama is not Carter- he’s metrosexual Abe Lincoln, gravitas helps him look more like the serious guy up against a clown.
Romney is not Reagan. He’s Dukakis (but less nice). He’ll smirk and come off incongruous.
Obama is not austere-guy, he’s stimulus soc1alist-guy. Austere-guy, policy-wise, is Romney and granny-starver Ryan. Them smirking and sneering is not a winning tactic.
The best thing Obama can do is bait Romney to be profoundly disrespectful and unserious even if it makes us rage and the wingnut base squee in delight- because it’s not laughing-guy offers candy and serious guy says eat your peas.
It’s serious guy offers candy if you’ll do your homework, and laughing guy steals your money and lies to your face and seems fucking insane. Laughing guy is the one offering austerity and belt-tightening as long as it’s your belt not his. And it’s only him laughing, everybody else is kinda staring. He’s NOT REAGAN. He’s really, really not.
Obama doesn’t need to do any sort of rhetorical counterpunch to make himself seem folksy or funky. All he has to do is be himself, unruffled, and let Romney spaz out and pretend to be folksy. Let Romney try to pretend to be likeable! Let the wingnuts and possibly the media believe he succeeded! I’m guessing it’ll be really, really creepy when he tries.