Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

Is it irresponsible to speculate? It is irresponsible not to.

The GOP couldn’t organize an orgy in a whorehouse with a fist full of 50s.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

Despite his magical powers, I don’t think Trump is thinking this through, to be honest.

Sitting here in limbo waiting for the dice to roll

Roe isn’t about choice, it’s about freedom.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Do not shrug your shoulders and accept the normalization of untruths.

Putin dreamed of ending NATO, and now it’s Finnish-ed.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

We’ll be taking my thoughts and prayers to the ballot box.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

Just because you believe it, that doesn’t make it true.

They’re not red states to be hated; they are voter suppression states to be fixed.

Red lights blinking on democracy’s dashboard

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Open Thread

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For the both of you who noticed my absence, sorry about that. Having unemployment and fatherhood roll up at about the same tends to focus the mind on something other than yabbling about politics. You know what would be awesome though? Paid maternity leave. Maybe one of the eight thousand interest groups with ‘family’ in the title could try campaigning for that.

Don’t worry about me; out of however many job contests I have enough silver medals to win a pentathlon. Clearly people think that I am at least pretty good at what I do. Some ongoing conversations sound very promising so the wife will more likely have some free babycare for a bit rather than a permanent lump on the couch.

In other news, if you ever wondered whether dobermans can swim, the answer is a qualified yes. Only people who have followed Max for a while can appreciate how much courage the little guy is showing here.

Reader Interactions

81Comments

  1. 1.

    raven

    Bohdi did the same thing last week. He’ll crash through the waves at Hatteras but he fooled around forever going off a 2 ft dock after a ball.

  5. 5.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    For the both of you who noticed my absence, sorry about that.

    Me and who else, Tim? Prolly Corner Stone. He builds a virtual Balloon Juice in a shoebox per thread and populates them with little figurines made out of paper and paper clips. Pretty incredible actually.

    I just have a good memory.

  6. 6.

    Elizabelle

    Cruising TPM, I see that Howard Kurtz has joined Fox News (no surprise) and that Stephen Colbert’s mom, Lorna, died last week, aged 92. (Did not know that.)

  7. 7.

    gogol's wife

    I wuv Max. So sweet. Good luck with the job search. If I were king of the world, you would have your own TV show for $1,000,000/week showing Max videos.

  9. 9.

    bill d

    @Elizabelle:

    I’ll give Kurtz oneto two months there based on his own stupidity. He’ll try one of his beign “all news networks are guilty” comparisons and bring up something minor FoxNews did, FoxNews will balk and Kurtz will be dumbfounded.

  11. 11.

    Svensker

    Sequester got ya? So sorry. What a dumb system we have.

    Congrats on the baby! It’s unclear from what you wrote but has he/she/both arrived yet? Tell all!

    I wuv Max.

  15. 15.

    Yatsuno

    Y U BE MEAN TO TEH MAXPUPPEH???

    I keed, of course. Dobies are not really known for their swimming abilities. A Lab would jump right off the dock and get the stick.

  18. 18.

    Schlemizel

    Oddly, all those “family” organizations seem to support permanent maternity leave. Payment would come from the moms husband because he is the HoH

  19. 19.

    muddy

    My dog swims really low and often snaps at the water in front of his snout. It looks like he is biting his way across.

  20. 20.

    Poopyman

    @Tim F.: I got out-sequestered in March, and I can say it’s done wonders for the garden. Once the weather moves into the standard hot & dry of high summer it’ll be sucky, but right now I’m enjoying the great outdoors.

    Except looking for work sucks up entirely too much time.

  21. 21.

    burnspbesq

    Yes, emoprogs, you were wrong about Justice Kagan, and if it took her righteous rant of a dissent in American Express for you to realize that, you’re even dumber than I previously thought you were.

    P.S. Yes, the majority got it wrong, but if you think it means the inevitable demise of the class action, stop yer whining and start lobbying. Congress has the power to overrule the Supreme Court’s interpretation of the Federal Arbitration Act by amending the statute. If you want agreements that preclude class arbitration to be unenforceable, get off your asses and use the damn political process to make it so.

  22. 22.

    Yatsuno

    @Schlemizel: They can’t offer paid maternity leave! How could they DARE to inconvenience a jerb creator in such a fashion? Why, those silly wimminz shouldn’t even be VOTING, much less working!

    /wingnut, in a moment of honesty

  24. 24.

    burnspbesq

    @Yatsuno:

    Oddly enough, your employer allowed me to take six weeks off when the kid was born, with pay. I was going crazy after two weeks, begging them to send some of my files to the house so I could work while spouse and kid were both napping, and they wouldn’t.

  28. 28.

    Yatsuno

    @burnspbesq: Michele Bachmann ha two of her kids while working at the IRS. She spent more time on maternity leave than actually working. Granted they paid me while I was out for my back, but I had to pay that back, in fact I still am. I will be taking advantage of this when the new hips come about.

  29. 29.

    TooManyJens

    @bill d:

    I’ll give Kurtz oneto two months there based on his own stupidity. He’ll try one of his beign “all news networks are guilty” comparisons and bring up something minor FoxNews did, FoxNews will balk and Kurtz will be dumbfounded.

    Not necessarily. He now has a job where he doesn’t have to parrot “both sides do it,” so why would he bother?

  30. 30.

    Southern Beale

    You know what would be awesome though? Paid maternity leave. Maybe one of the eight thousand interest groups with ‘family’ in the title could try campaigning for that.

    That would require them to actually care about anything that’s not a fetus. Not gonna happen.

    In the meantime, gay conversion group Exodus International has shut down, with an apology from its president for all of the hurt its caused.

  33. 33.

    peach flavored shampoo

    Are you really ever unemployed when you work for B-J? Surprised you’re not living the good life with that check John sends you each month.

  34. 34.

    Face

    What you really need to do to get hired is go get a PhD in a science or bioscience field, preferably from a Eastern-ish school, like something in Philly or Pittsburgh. Then post-doc a few years, and you’ll have hiring directors creaming their jeans (what’s the chick version of this? Milking their bras?).

    Wait, what?

  37. 37.

    burnspbesq

    @Yatsuno:

    She spent more time on maternity leave than actually working.

    Which is probably a good thing, on balance. Trying to imagine her standing up in front of Judge Cohen (a well-known serial abuser of bad or unprepared government lawyers) in the Tax Court is giving me a bad case of the giggles.

  39. 39.

    Another Halocene Human

    @MikeJ: Why do I have a feeling the actual ruling takes away as it gives?

    I mean, yeah, that whole sitch was bullshit but I smell agenda.

  40. 40.

    Violet

    OMG! That is the cutest video. Look at Max working so hard to get the stick! Good doggie!

    Glad you are doing well. I trust you’ll keep us updated on both Baby F. and your job hunt.

  41. 41.

    Another Halocene Human

    @Southern Beale: I thought it was pretty big of him to acknowledge that their discredited psychobabble blames parents for kids turning out gay and how fucking hurtful that is. (As if it’s blameworthy anyhow.)

  42. 42.

    Another Halocene Human

    @ Tim

    I had a post but FYWP ateded it about how maternity leave in much of Europe passed with support of nativist right wing patriarchal racist dickbags. Unless I’m missing something. (I’m not saying the Left opposed it, I’m just saying the Right didn’t have pure intentions.)

    So I’m wondering how you build a majority coalition for it in the US.

  44. 44.

    Chyron HR

    @Face:

    Then post-doc a few years, and you’ll have hiring directors creaming their jeans (what’s the chick version of this? Milking their bras?).

    I believe the term is, “not a dry seat in the house”.

  45. 45.

    TheMightyTrowel

    @Punchy: if you don’t think women can cream their jeans, you clearly have not pleased enough women.

    Also best of luck to you Tim. We’ve all been there, but it still feels like shit every time they say no. The right one will find you.

  48. 48.

    Betty Cracker

    Your dobie swims like a boxer dog, i.e., tries to go UP, not FORWARD. My dogs were better swimmers as pups. Maybe the puppy fat keeps them afloat?

  50. 50.

    peach flavored shampoo

    If you got Aaron Hernandez in your keeper league, you may be truly screwed. Unless you have him in your prison league.

    He just turned in his cell phone to the police in pieces, and his home security system in pieces too. Seems like the work of an innocent man.

  54. 54.

    MikeJ

    @Southern Beale: In that case I can tell you exactly what the fuckstick was thinking:

    1) 11,000 signatures! There’s no way they actually check each and every one of these!
    2) If you believe you can get away with something, you have an obligation to do it. It’s amazing how many people[1] believe that if you get away with something it’s proof that the victim a)is stupid b)is evil or c) secretly wants you to.

    [1] internet libertarians.

  56. 56.

    Another Halocene Human

    @MikeJ: Well, the Reich Wing has used their twisted interpretation of the first amendment to defend taking Federal dollars and then turning around and using those dollars in discriminatory programs. Usually in terms of hiring and employee procedures on their side because they can only get away with some much mandatory-proselytizing-to-get-fed and so on on the client side before AU or ACLU shows up with lawyers.

    I’m just concerned that they struck a political clause which, granted, sounds kind of ridiculous, which will open up to WATB Dominionist orgs being able to belly up for federal dollars which they have no intention of spending in the way that Congress intended, and using this decision to wave away the fact that their core mission is 180 from what the program services are supposed to be. So, let’s say Pregnancy Crisis Centers trying to supplant PP and going for state monies for provision of free medical care. Even if state regulators know that hinky stuff is going on. This gives them more cover to deflect and deny.

  57. 57.

    Roger Moore

    @Southern Beale:

    In the meantime, gay conversion group Exodus International has shut down, with an apology from its president for all of the hurt its caused.

    Wow, that seems like an unusually genuine and honest apology. I think the guy still has a way to go, but it’s a hell of a start.

  58. 58.

    Another Halocene Human

    @bill d: Yes! And it seems like liberal trolling about the size of the bill did some good because the GOP lost control of the message and their faux-populist rank and file threw a fit their corporate masters weren’t expecting–hahahahaha

    No doubt this isn’t over and Big Agra will get paid.

    I wish they’d stop funding unsustainable agriculture with no benefit to the American people. No, we do NOT need to grow our own cotton. If we’re so paranoid about foreign fibers ditch hemp is quite hardy stuff in NA. No we do NOT need more fucking cattle ranches on environmentally sensitive land. (Why can’t Americans learn to love goat meat?) No, we do NOT need to embargo Brazilian ethanol and turn feed corn into fuel. Christ almighty!

  59. 59.

    MikeJ

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Dominionist orgs being able to belly up for federal dollars which they have no intention of spending in the way that Congress intended,

    That really has nothing to do with this. The money for the program still has to be spent within the terms of the program. The court said you can’t mandate speech outside the bounds of the program.

  60. 60.

    Roger Moore

    @Face:

    what’s the chick version of this? Milking their bras?

    People usually talk about women’s panties getting wet, but I’m not sure what the active form of that is.

  61. 61.

    Another Halocene Human

    @MikeJ: Ie, why doesn’t the battered woman (who has been threatened with death, & more) left the abuser? She must be codependent/crazy/secretly in love with it.

  62. 62.

    ruemara

    Sorry to hear of the unemp fairy visiting you, but congratulations on the fresh new human about to enter your life. raise her/him right: ninja training.

    Just heard from a job I was authorised to apply to by the state system. They said I wasn’t authorised. I’m at the point where, as an editor, I’d write a number of helpful suggestions back to the author to tone back the pathos and deal with things more realistically, because it just feels like the writer is indulging in melodrama. God needs a better editor.

  63. 63.

    Roger Moore

    @Another Halocene Human:

    So I’m wondering how you build a majority coalition for it in the US.

    I think you could probably do some of the same thing. Convince the right wing filth that maternity leave will help the whites outreproduce Those People, and they’ll fight to see who can support it the most strongly.

  64. 64.

    JPL

    @peach flavored shampoo: The guy is innocent until proven guilty. Admittedly it doesn’t look good but there could be a reasonable explanation. For example, he could be hiding the fact that he murdered someone.
    Tim Tebow is now saying help me jesus, I joined a f..ked up team.

  65. 65.

    quannlace

    I wondered why there wasn’t anybody pestering us to call our Congress critter, lately.

  67. 67.

    Another Halocene Human

    @MikeJ: Yeah, but we’re already dealing with cases where faith-based groups that took money through the Bush-and-now-Obama-the-big-fat-sucker’s faith-based programs are violating federal law in the way they administer those programs.

    My fear is it’s like the Patent Office. Patent fees are too low plus that money gets plowed into the General Fund and not the USPTO, so everything gets rubberstamped instead of having clerks do basic reviews for prior art. This completely destroys the utility of the patent system and by basically giving up on any sort of gateway and “letting the courts sort it out” they put patent trollery on steroids. It’s causing real economic damage (to say the least).

    You take a group that is anti-reproductive rights and give them monies to administer reproductive health programs and now you have to wait for the right person to do a test lawsuit and let that wind its way through the courts and then have the consent decree and then five years later get caught again, rinse, repeat; meanwhile the directors live in mansions and buy boats and the organizations have built brand new HQs with the federal $$$ and thousands of families deal with the misery wrought by their malfeasance.

    How can the government avoid running money through troll groups now?

  68. 68.

    Another Halocene Human

    @Roger Moore: But they’re stone cold convinced that all brown people have a special hookup with every Great Society program (and it siphons money out of their social security and medicare that they EARNED).

    And then the left in this country is very much enamored with the overpopulation notion. Lot of them do not care for subsidizing child rearing where it’s seen as benefiting parents. (Most liberals rationalize that HUD, food stamps, free school lunch, head start, is for the children. But parents staying home from work is a bridge too far.)

  69. 69.

    MikeJ

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Yeah, but we’re already dealing with cases where faith-based groups that took money through the Bush-and-now-Obama-the-big-fat-sucker’s faith-based programs are violating federal law in the way they administer those programs

    That may be, but that is a different issue.

    Groups that receive funding to implement programs have to implement the program. Specifically what that entails is written into the grant, and grants can be and are cut off all the time for failure to perform.

  72. 72.

    Roger Moore

    @JPL:
    If he did actually destroy his phone and security tapes, he’s almost certainly guilty of destroying evidence, which could result in a lengthy spell in prison even if he is never convicted of murder.

  73. 73.

    gogol's wife

    @quannlace:

    Ooh, right, Tim F.’s show could combine Max videos with phone-a-thons for righteous issues. I wish I were a network executive.

  78. 78.

    Central Planning

    I got laid off in July, 2001. That was the best summer ever.

    Who would have known the joy of being able to be home with 3 kids (newborn, 2, 4)? I didn’t expect it to be so fun because I was conditioned to be at work 8-5 every day (and then some).

    Great times!

  79. 79.

    YoohooCthulhu

    Ahh, the sequester. The amount of “creative accounting” I’ve seen arise at my research institute in the last several months is something to behold. I’m currently an employee of a university I’ve never visited because it allows us to save ~80% on indirect costs. The other possibility my boss was considering was reforming his lab as a company which rents laboratory space from our research institute.

    Suffice it to say, things are hard all around.

  80. 80.

    RSA

    For the both of you who noticed my absence…

    I was here when you joined John as the very first BJ co-blogger. Fun times. (Not being a dog person, I don’t have much to say about recent posts, though.)

    Best of luck on the job hunt. And congratulations on Baby F.!

  81. 81.

    DanR2

    Wow. I don’t question Max’s courage, but–holy shit–our cocker spaniel looks like a dolphin compared to Max in the water.

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