But what the hell happened to the alfalfa and broccoli sprout production in this country? I can’t find the damned things anywhere, and I absolutely love them.
I had all the boys over for a big spaghetti and meatball dinner yesterday, and after all that cooking and cleaning, I decided I just wanted to have some Jewish soul food for dinner. Bagel, cream cheese, capers, thinly sliced red onion, smoked salmon, SPROUTS, and then topped with fresh tomato and salt and pepper.
But they had no sprouts, so I had to go with a partial sammich for dinner. And they have been absent from my groceries for over a year. What happened? I asked and they told me they couldn’t be shipped safely.
How can this be? We send nuclear waste cross country. Every day on the highway I see trucks laden with chemicals and petrol. How can we possibly not be able to ship fucking alfalfa sprouts safely? WTF?
Why has the free market not figured this out yet?
Also, I kind of snickered a couple of hours ago when I caught myself peering into the fridge bellowing “WHERE THE HELL ARE MY CAPERS?”
Issues, I have them.
TheMightyTrowel
There have been a couple of really high profile food poisoning incidents associated with sprouts in recent years. This German/EU case is the one that most immediately leaps to mind.
gogol's wife
Since when are sprouts Jewish soul food?
JoyceH
Alfalfa sprouts are the only type of sprouts my grocery carries. I miss the big old mung beans, so I ordered a sprouter. Can sprout four little trays of different sprouts, so I also got a sampler to try out new things. Right now I’m sprouting adzuki and marrowfat pea.
lamh36
ok, this is def not a problem I’m used to in my urban ethnic fam & relations…lol.
if I was to ask my uncle (who works at the produce) section of the grocery store in NOLA this, he would look tame like “Alfa-what”..lol
ruemara
Honey, you can grow them yourself. You can find sprout starting kits online. If you have a good asian market near you, mung bean sprouts with salted black beans is the shiznit. At least when you’re a college student who needs to spend no more than 25 cents per serving on breakie. Throw in half a scallion pancake and you are eating well.
Omnes Omnibus
Shouldn’t the sprouts go with tofu?
Betty Cracker
Since I’m not a rabbit, I don’t eat sprouts, so haven’t noticed their absence. But yeah, it is weird that transportation is cites as the issue. Sounds fishy to me. Maybe sprouts are the ideal salmonella carrier or something.
gogol's wife
@Omnes Omnibus:
Yeah, and brown rice. Not bagel and lox.
LiberalTarian
There are some people who don’t think you should eat alfalfa anything.
TheMightyTrowel
@gogol’s wife: You don’t like brown rice?!? What are you, some sort of ricist?
gogol's wife
@efgoldman:
Maybe it was Nova.
Gin & Tonic
@efgoldman: Prolly doesn’t even know the difference.
The Other Chuck
The problem is you live in WEST VIRGINIA.
Here in San Francisco, I can get sprouts anywhere they sell, like, food.
Southern Beale
Don’t know about sprouts but it’s been so wet and cool in the southeast this year that a lot of crops have really suffered. WaPo did a story on it.
Yatsuno
Or, y’know, grow your own. Healthier and safer than the stores these days.
@TheMightyTrowel: There were several in the US as well, so there must have been some major supply breakdown somewhere. I’ll have to check if I see them here anywhere.
Omnes Omnibus
@efgoldman: I call it smoked salmon unless it is in close proximity to a bagel.
BillinGlendaleCA
I blame Obama.
NotMax
Sprouts and capers are not Jewish garnishes. Dilettante-ish ones, perhaps.
But then smoked salmon ain’t either; Nova-style lox is.
Gin & Tonic
@Omnes Omnibus: Calling smoked salmon lox doesn’t make it lox.
Cacti
Actual thread title from Democratic Underground:
“Bradley Manning wishing he’d just shot an unarmed black teenager.”
Q: What’s another name for ironic hipster racism?
A: Racism
Culture of Truth
Obama.
NotMax
Repeated from previous thread only because it fits this one so well.
True story.
Something I overheard one time at a NYC deli/nosherie:
Woman #1 (gentile) was waxing enthusiastic about the first bagel with lox and cream cheese she had ever tasted, mere moments before.
Woman #2: “Now let me tell you about the rest of the religion.”
scav
@Gin & Tonic: Smoked salmon standards have gotten so lox . . .
gogol's wife
Oy, with the puns already . . .
Gin & Tonic
@scav: Puns were downstairs, last I checked.
Culture of Truth
What about a mapcap crime movie involving stealing a transport of valuable capers?
Davis X. Machina
@Gin & Tonic: You can make your own ‘smoked’ salmon to have with your home-grown sprouts. Farm-raised salmon needs a little help, and turning it into less-than-fully-assed gravlax does the trick. I add liquid smoke (Wright’s, not Colgin’s) to Alton Brown’s basic recipe, and skip the dill.
Oh, and broccoli sprouts and capers and raw onions…
gbear
They kept trying to ship the sprouts and the nuclear waste in the same truck.
Gin & Tonic
@Culture of Truth: There was a line in The Adventures of Nick Danger about “stuffed, like an anchovy, with last night’s capers.”
The Dangerman
@scav:
Stop, you’re giving me a haddock…
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
Alfalfa sprouts degrade really quickly, and that’s why safe shipping is a problem. Also, alfalfa is a great drought crop, so it’s like to fare poorly with lots of rain.
But mainly, it’s hard to keep them fresh, so that’s why you aren’t going to see them. Grow your own.
I want to see these studies – and the methodologies – that show alfalfa spouts increase inflammation as the linked chiropractor claims. Any cites?
Keith P.
Capers with lox is a must for me, but I’d never heard of sprouts on it, too. Haven’t noticed sprouts being MIA….my store usually has alfalfa and broccosprouts.
schrodinger's cat
Smoked salmon goes great with scrambled eggs and toast for a decadent breakfast. Add caviar if you want to be even more decadent.
ruemara
@Davis X. Machina: OOoo I may try that. I love making Gravlax.
scav
@Gin & Tonic: Buns rise to the occasion.
runs
Davis X. Machina
@Cacti: DemocraticUnderground.com, huh? They’re ordinarily on the other side of the emo-prog event horizon there — no information can get in or out…
gogol's wife
Thread needs some Theodore Bikel. Main shtetele Belz:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8iLkctciEY
NotMax
Next week, on a very special episode of Balloon Juice, Mr. Cole misplaces a jar of schmaltz.
Davis X. Machina
@schrodinger’s cat: James Beard used to heat Scotch and butter up in a saucepan, scissor smoked salmon into it, and then use that as a pasta topping.
It’s wicked pissah.
MikeJ
@Davis X. Machina:
That is the main thing I do not miss about the east coast. Thank F-M for the pacific salmon varieties.
schrodinger's cat
For a minute I thought it was wheat grass, that my boss kitteh loves.
Gin & Tonic
@Davis X. Machina: While I’m one of those annoying purists on the terminology, I actually prefer sable for eating.
Davis X. Machina
@efgoldman: My wife, from Newark, taught me to do them up that way. I have no doubt it’s not echt — she’s got aging hippie sisters who are probably the original deviants.
Omnes Omnibus
@Gin & Tonic: Fuck it, I prefer the Scottish stuff anyway.
RandomMonster
Cole, I’m going to teach a man to fish. Or, as it were, to sprout: http://sproutpeople.org
These folks have been at it for years, and they know their shit. Trust them, and get sproutin’.
Bobby Thomson
I kind of snickered when I read that without a critical r.
Davis X. Machina
@Gin & Tonic: I brought a whitefish back from a Wegman’s last weekend, and had whitefish salad. I don’t know why, since in Maine we’re otherwise tuchis-deep in fish, and lakes, it’s so hard to get it. OTOH, there’s a one-pound bag of looks ‘meh’/tastes great Duck Trap Farm salmon trim that’s the best buy in the business routinely available at Shaws’. Making it pretty really drives up salmon prices.
David in NY
@efgoldman: isn’t goyim plural? My wife would have said “the goy,” I think. Which, come to think of it, sounds slightly more offensive (to a goy).
Omnes Omnibus
@schrodinger’s cat: Very James Bond.
RandomMonster
@Davis X. Machina: Duck Trap IS a great company. I buy their smoked trout all the time.
glaukopis
I occasionally have problems finding organic soy spouts (my bird loves them), but mung bean, alfalfa, mixed mini-sprouts (including radish) not a problem here.
gbear
@efgoldman: For me it was at about 53.
Gin & Tonic
@Davis X. Machina: Wish I had a Wegman’s here. Love smoked whitefish salad, but that’s something I can’t eat often. Otherwise I live for my every-few-months pilgrimages to Russ & Daughters.
Gin & Tonic
@David in NY: Doesn’t sound particularly offensive to this goy.
NotMax
@efgoldman
A sandwich of pieces of meat from the chicken used to make a soup placed between slices of real Jewish rye (with seeds) which have been slathered with schmaltz is just shy of pure nirvana.
p.a.
@Culture of Truth: the great caper caper?
My Sunday breakfast: smoked salmon eggs Benedict. English muffin, cream cheese, salmon, tomato, soft poached egg, hollandaise, capers and onion. Mmmmmmmm
David in NY
@Gin & Tonic: You never heard my mother-in-law say it. (“My greatest failure in life was that my daughter married a goy.” Made worse by, “Of course R [the younger daughter] did too, but her husband would have converted.” Which was a total lie. My suspicion was that WASP goys were worse than Italian goys to her.)
JerryN
Sprouts??? Bubbelah, the only kind of sprout my lantslaite cook with are Brussles.
schrodinger's cat
@Omnes Omnibus: Actually I stole the idea from my Norwegian friend who served it for Christmas breakfast.
schrodinger's cat
@Davis X. Machina: I don’t drink scotch but that does sound delicious.
NotMax
@efgoldman
Is sacramental wine goy sauce?
David in NY
@efgoldman: A guy who puts sprouts on a bagel with lox and cream cheese — are you kidding? Boy needs a trip to Russ & Daughters.
schrodinger's cat
I am not to fond of bagels, probably I haven’t eaten the real good ones. Too dense.
Gin & Tonic
@efgoldman: Um, Horton’s in E.P.? Evelyn’s in Tiverton? Flo’s in Middletown? Champlin’s in Narragansett? Aunt Carrie’s in Point Judith? Up the scale, Matunuck Oyster?
Omnes Omnibus
@schrodinger’s cat: I got from the Bond books when I was a kid.
TooManyJens
Before I looked more closely at the picture, I thought this was going to be a thread about the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@efgoldman: I’m pretty sure he doesn’t, actually.
David in NY
Somehow this seems right: the Andrews’ sisters “Bei mir bist du shoen”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe2UXccid40
Davis X. Machina
@Gin & Tonic: Those are all south of Providence, no? I think e.g. lives in the NE corner of the state. Point Judith is the home of the best scallops and swordfish I have ever had….
Roger Moore
@LiberalTarian:
Somebody doesn’t know crap about immunology. I saw this and had to laugh:
For those of you who don’t know anything about immunology, this is exactly backward. Inflammatory arthritis and lupus (and other autoimmune diseases) are caused by an overactive immune system, not one that’s been inhibited. If somebody can’t get even that level of stuff right, they should be ignored or, even better, laughed at.
NotMax
@David in NY
Start him out easy with a trip to Zabar’s, then a stop at the Carnegie Deli.
By then he’ll be prepped for the pilgrimage downtown for the real stuff.
David in NY
@schrodinger’s cat: Wait. For bagels, dense is GOOD. Somehow midwesterners or such (I am one actually) have got their hands on the industry and turned bagels into Wonder Bread.
And then, there’s Montreal bagels, but that’s a different story. You’d really hate them. Dense to the point of wooden.
Gin & Tonic
@Davis X. Machina: They are. But when he chooses to live practically in Mass, it seems churlish to complain that the closest fried seafood is in Mass. There are plenty of viable options within the great State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations
Felonius Monk
I would imagine they are right next to your god-damned mustard!
Nobody can lose track of their foodstuffs like you can, John.
geg6
I’m not Jewish but that doesn’t sound very Jewish to me, Cole. But it does sound delish.
NotMax
Continuing in the spirit of the Judaic-related videos being linked, let’s eat.
Gin & Tonic
@David in NY: Ah, Montreal bagels. You want a flame war, there’s a way to start one. Mac-vs-PC aint’ got nothing on Fairmount vs St. Viateur, let alone Montreal vs NYC. Have you ever had a really fresh one? They’re really something, but they’re only good for an hour or two.
TheMightyTrowel
@Roger Moore: Oh my god! world upside down! medical advice on the internet was wrong! I may have to retreat into a cave and shun society now that my trust has been so sorely broken!
NotMax
Arrgh. Bad linky. Corrected:
Continuing in the spirit of the Judaic-related videos being linked, let’s eat.
Tata
Here in Central Jersey, yer basic Italians and Peoples of the Book have developed certain borrowed habits. For instance, at dinnertime, my Sicilian grandmother and Jewish mother-in-law were virtually interchangeable except where vegetables were cooked or overcooked. Anyhoo, capers on bagels, lox, cream cheese and red onion: what’s not to love?
scav
@David in NY: Ah, yes, and for the random, I’m fairly sure I picked this version up from here at some point. Adding to random, I somehow got from Goy/Goyim to Dissociative Identity Disorder to Iatrogenesis, the last of which I am so keeping for scrabble and babble.
Davis X. Machina
@Gin & Tonic: If you’re a Bostonian, south of ACI Cranston it’s all “Here be dragons” except for Newport.
Roger Moore
@TheMightyTrowel:
I know. When has a chiropractor ever steered you wrong before?
Villago Delenda Est
Well, it’s profitable, but not profitable enough.
So fuck it.
Gin & Tonic
@Davis X. Machina: Good point.
gogol's wife
@Gin & Tonic:
I have a St. Viateur T-shirt! They’re good, but I prefer H&H circa 1980.
smike
I used to make bean sprouts by loading a bunch of beans in a quart canning jar and letting them soak for a while. You then pour the water off and replace the ‘cap’ part of the jar with some cheesecloth. Rinse the beans and then lean it mouth down into a bowl and put the bowl in a cabinet. Rinse the beans at least daily. Here is an example of googling ‘bean sprouts in a jar’:
http://www.seriouseats.com/2011/04/how-to-grow-bean-sprouts-in-a-jar.html
Epicurus
John, acknowledging that you have a problem is the first step towards recovery. Sprouts on a lox bagel? Meshugah…
Angela
@Roger Moore: The Lupus Foundation ( and my rheumatologist) do tell those diagnosed with lupus to not eat alfalfa.
From the Lupus Foundation website -One food for people with lupus to avoid is alfalfa. Alfalfa tablets have been associated with reports of a lupus-like syndrome or lupus flares. The lupus-like effects may include muscle pain, fatigue, abnormal blood test results, changes in how the immune system functions, and kidney problems. These reactions may be due to the amino acid L-canavanine (found in alfalfa seeds and sprouts, but not in leaves), which can activate the immune system and increase inflammation.
Gin & Tonic
@gogol’s wife: I think 33-year-old bagels would be pretty dry.
David in NY
@Gin & Tonic: My wife’s mother and sister were Montreal Jews and so, yes, I’ve had them. My wife keeps trying to get me to this place in Brooklyn (Mile End) for them and some smoked meat, but I’ve evaded it so far.
Mike in NC
Never in my life heard of sprouts on a bagel. Must be a WV thang.
David in NY
@gogol’s wife: You have a supply of H&H 1980? I mean they used to be really good (dense, sorry schroedinger’s c), but a little hard to imagine having them now.
Omnes Omnibus
@Mike in NC: It might have come from California.
scav
@Omnes Omnibus: ‘zackly. @Mike in NC: Sprouts on a bagel, pure 70s alternative West Coast granola Bread&Roses Café staple.
Feebog
@ Davis X Machina:
Scotch, butter and smoked salmon over pasta? I’m there, going to try this as soon as I buy a new bottle of scotch.
TheMightyTrowel
@Roger Moore: I feel… manipulated…
(here all week! try your waiter! tip the veal!)
Gin & Tonic
@David in NY:
I loved that quote.
NotMax
@many entries above
Whatever those things (sometimes frozen, sometimes ‘fresh’) are in supermarkets that are marketed as bagels – they’re not. They’re bagel-shaped impostors, a doughy equivalent of tofurkey.
“Nobody doesn’t like Sara Lee” is fallacious advertising when it comes to their entry.
burnspbesq
I’m about to start a cross-country flame war.
The pastrami at Langer’s in LA is better than either Stage or Carnegie.
Suck it, Noo Yawkas.
Roger Moore
@Angela:
Note, though, that she still has it backward; she’s saying that alfalfa hurts the immune system and that’s what causes the problem. I think this is a classic case of somebody assuming that a stronger immune system is better and a weaker one is worse. It turns out that’s not the case, and an overactive immune system can cause as many problems as one that’s too weak.
Omnes Omnibus
@burnspbesq: Chicago does better meat than New York or LA.
Roger Moore
@NotMax:
I believe the technical description is “round rolls with holes in the middle”. Yes, I bake my own bagels.
kindness
I prefer raddish sprouts. Gives a little heat.
TheMightyTrowel
@Omnes Omnibus: So Upton Sinclair has told us.
burnspbesq
@TheMightyTrowel:
Ca, c’est froid.
Omnes Omnibus
@TheMightyTrowel: Turn of the prior century meatpacking was ugly everywhere, but at least it gave us the Green Bay Packers.
ETA: Hell, it’s probably ugly now.
NotMax
@RogerMoore
One small consolation is the lack of mass marketing of bialys.
Mike in NC
@Omnes Omnibus: @scav: My first job out of college was in Cambridge near MIT, and I soon discovered an awesome bagel bakery in Brookline during my commute that I stopped at every week.
As for California, I never even saw a single bagel the year I was stationed there, but did love being introduced to some awesome Korean, Japanese, and Filipino cuisine.
seaboogie
@David in NY: Yay Montreal bagels! They are dense as hell, but a lot skinnier with a big hole in the middle so that you get the right ratio of bagel to toppings….
burnspbesq
Plaintiff’s Exhibit 1.
http://www.foodrepublic.com/2012/07/31/sorry-new-york-los-angeles-has-country%E2%80%99s-two-best
Felonius Monk
@NotMax: Best bagels come from the Monticello Bagel Bakery in Monticello, NY — beats anything I’ve had anywhere else including the City — but then again, I haven’t tried every one in the City, so I’m open to suggestions.
MomSense
Shoot, I have plenty of capers as they are about the only thing that not devoured by my boys within 15 minutes of taking them out of the grocery bag.
BillinGlendaleCA
@burnspbesq: I’ve been to Langer’s, but don’t like the pastrami. Langer’s is OK, but when I went, avoiding the junkies was a challenge.
David in NY
@Gin & Tonic: I have eaten at Schwartz’s, I’m pretty sure, dragged there by the Montreal family. OK if you like that sort of thing, and plenty of atmosphere.
karen marie
@TheMightyTrowel: peeps at my grocery store said that’s why they stopped selling mung sprouts. Chinese grocery still sells them, however.
Redshirt
I just lick the store brand cream cheese right off the Pepperidge Farm bagel. Yum! I love bagels.
meepers
@RandomMonster: Agreed here. I have a Sproutmaster from this site, and it’s been great. I buy my seeds from Sprout People or Sprout House, rinse twice daily, and when the sprouts are ready, put the whole tray in the fridge. Between uses I soak the trays and lids in Oxiclean for a few hours to kill off any fungus, and then I’m ready to go again. I’ve had great Broccoli mixes, Dill mixes, straight Mung beans, and spicy radish mixes using this system.
joel hanes
Here is a somewhat more credible argument against eating alfalfa sprouts, ever.
joel hanes
And here is one reason that many groceries carry far fewer sprouts than they did a decade or so ago, especially alfalfa sprouts.
joel hanes
We grew our own sprouts in college, in the dark cabinet under the sink, with equipment no more complicated than a Mason jar, a square of nylon netting from a friend’s discarded pantyhose, and a plastic bowl.
mung sprouts are great, but our suprise favorite was lentil sprouts, which taste quite a bit like garden-fresh petite peas.
LiberalTarian
@joel hanes:
Sorry I didn’t find a better reference for the protein in the sprouts. I like yours though.
I’d been looking for Sally Fallon’s quote re alfalfa sprouts and didn’t have enough time to dig.
I have a different form of autoimmune kidney disease, but if its bad for lupus it’s bad for me.
Lots of other good seeds out there for sprouts. My favorites are onion and spicy clover–radish and sunflower seed are also very tasty. So easy to grow.
manyakitty
@efgoldman: Dude. It’s irreplaceable. I render my own when the kosher butchers run low on it. No other way to make potato kugel.
manyakitty
@Roger Moore: Me too. In fact, I also bake my own bagel DOGS. Mmmmm
Joy
Jesus! I read “peering into my fridge” and thought it said “peeing in my fridge”. I need new glasses.
Original Lee
Cinnamon-raisin bagel with roasted garlic hummus. Yum! That is all.
Matt
@a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q):
“increasing inflammation” is basically woomeister-speak for “S’cuse me while I whip this pseudoscientific claim out”.
Susanne
SPROUTS?!!? On the sacramental breakfast? What’s next? Pastrami and mayo on white bread? My parents are rolling over in their graves.
mrmike
@Original Lee:
Cinnamon-raisin bagel
That’s not a bagel. That’s a doughnut.
bcinaz
What happened to sprouts is E. coli and Salmonella. Victory for deregulation! Sprout your own, John, it’s really EASY. Also too – Listeria.
Luci
I see everyone else has weighed in on the sprouts thing, but I’ll add my bit. :) They’re super easy to make, and you can feel virtuous about it, as they’re super cheap too. You can usually find alfalfa seeds in a co-op or someplace like that, and a tablespoon of them will make a whole jar full. They’re fresher than what you can buy, and you can always have a supply on hand for sammich making. I did it for many years in a quart jar. If you don’t have cheesecloth, just put a few nail holes in the lid of the quart jar for air, and there you go… a sprout maker. As someone else said… directions are online. It takes no time at all and is really kind of cool to watch them grow. Now… about the capers… I cannot help you with that, as I’ve never made, or bought them. ;)