Mark Halperin’s one-time influence in Washington (people really read The Note, as disturbing as that is) is a dark stain on our nation’s history. The Flying Spaghetti Monster would be well within his rights to obliterate our entire civilization as punishment, or perhaps as part of a teachable moment.
This is even dumber than usual:
Pairs who could negotiate a CR/debt deal: Gene Sperling-Josh Bolten, Bill Clinton-George W. Bush, Ron Klain-James A Baker 3d . #justdoit
— Mark Halperin (@MarkHalperin) September 29, 2013
.@jonathanmprince Which leads to a solution how?
— Mark Halperin (@MarkHalperin) September 29, 2013
W and James Baker could negotiate whatever they wanted, the Cruzers wouldn’t accept it. W and James Baker are RINOs. QED.
Hill Dweller
Halperin makes Fournier look objective.
Baud
If only Obama had offered the GOP some type of Grand Bargain and not taken any discussion of tax increases off the table, we wouldn’t be in this mess.
Violet
How long before Ted Cruz fails conservativism and is shown to be a RINO?
Chris
I just noticed the Newsmax Headline: “Romney: Fix Political Dysfunction in DC.”
Who’s this “Romney” character again? I forget.
WereBear
I know I’m not the only person aghast at the stupidity on display here.
The Republicans are holding a gun to the head of every person on earth. To get their way… which has already been democratically rejected… and the result of which would be also disastrous.
Ya know, at some point we must discard stupidity, because this really is getting into malice territory.
PsiFighter37
Nice to note that none of those Republicans are in government right now, either.
Seriously, someone should kindly tell Mark Fucking Halperin (how the fuck did he even get a job, he is by far the worst ‘reporter’, if you can call him that, that covers Washington politics) that the issue is that THERE ARE NO FUCKING REPUBLICANS WHO ARE SANE (OR WHO ARE SANE AND HAS LIVE GONADS) WILLING TO TELL THE GOP TO GET WITH THE FUCKING PROGRAM.
I wish I could get paid the kind of money Mark Fucking Halperin does to play fantasy political football.
Asshole.
John O
God does not love me enough to give me a Clinton-Bush “negotiation.”
That could be the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen MH say. Craptacular.
geg6
I know there is a person to whom the title “stupidest man on the planet” has already been awarded, but I have always believed that title belongs to Halperin. I can feel myself losing IQ points any time I read something he’s written, heard something he’s said or even just had his name brought up in conversation.
Damn you, Doug J, for erasing another few points!
Wag
@Violet:
27 days. One day for each percentile in the mythic 27%.
PsiFighter37
@geg6: Mark Halperin is a TMZ reporter at heart who somehow ended up writing about politics. The man treats it like it’s the goddamn entertainment industry.
Mike E
Did he just call PBO a dick?!
Jim, Foolish Literalist
Wait… he’s saying this could happen now? he thinks Ted Cruz and Virginia Foxx are going to give their proxies to George W Bush, much less James Baker? He thinks they’re going to sit down and parlay with Bill Clinton because Orrin Hatch is pretending to be nostalgic for the “jerk” he voted to impeach?
Mort Halperin, Mark is a prototype for Luke Russert
nineone
@WereBear:
All that, and they’re still going to lose.
Morans.
As for Halperin, I am shocked that he didn’t suggest his t.v. Hubby, Morning Joke, for the job of Great White Problem Solver. And Mika! can be First MILF – er, um Mommy. Yeah, First Mommy.
ppcli
More pairs who would be able to negotiate a CR/Debt deal:
Obama-Sperling, Obama-Clinton, Obama-Bush II, Obama – Bolten, Obama-Klain, Obama – Baker.
Pairs who would not be able to negotiate a CR/Debt deal:
Cruz-Sperling, Cruz-Clinton, Cruz-Bush II, Cruz – Bolten, Cruz-Klain, Cruz – Baker.
Unless the second of those pairs were prepared to give Cruz everything he demanded and receive nothing in return.
Steeplejack
Halperin’s idiocy and meta-idiocy create a black hole of, well, über-idiocy. The whole point of a legislative body is to negotiate and come up with agreed-upon solutions. The ludicrous idea that we need to send in outside “envoys” to mediate between apparently implacable enemies serves only to confirm how insane the Republicans have become in their bubble—and what contortions their media enablers will go through to avoid recognizing that.
Mark S.
I had to google Gene Sperling and Ron Klain. But I think I can come up with some random pairs as well:
Aaron Spelling–FDR
John Adams–Thomas Jefferson
Jed Bartlett–Jeb Bush
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
Well, duh. To the Canadian born Rafael Cruz, they’re pretty much all squishes. He’s the only real conservative macho dude, with the possible exception of his wingman Mike Lee.
Short Bus Bully
This is a perfect example of our supposed betters not realizing even a little bit what’s going on in the reality outside their Village. The Mongols are laying siege demanding 100% capitulation or they raze the place and kill everyone (guess what they do if we DO capitulate?), and Halperin et al want to hug it out.
Fucking bunch of Nevelle Chamberlains…
Heliopause
Another pair that can solve this (or anything); God, Jesus, the Holy Ghost.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Mark S.: Walter White and LBJ
Mr Tulkinghorn and Lynne Cheney
Tony Soprano and Barbara Bush
Newt Gingrich and Lucille Bluth
rdldot
What’s really sad, and not being said, is that Obama is having an easier time talking to the new Iranian president than the GOP. That’s how bad they are.
mai naem
Don’t forget John McCain. McCain-Bush, McCain-Clinton, McCain-Sperling, McCain-Obama. Oops, no McCain-Cruz.
Villago Delenda Est
@PsiFighter37:
Well, he worked at the Mouse. Of course it’s about entertainment. Every “news” division of every network is about entertainment. Entertainment is what attracts eyeballs, which is what they sell to their true customers, the advertisers.
It’s all about the benjamins, always.
Heliopause
Speaking of pairs that can solve stuff, anybody else getting the “video that conservatives want banned” ads all over the place?
Citizen_X
@Mark S.: Seriously. Why not suggest Yoda – Walter White and Galadriel – Bismarck while we’re at it?
rdldot
I know this isn’t an open thread, but this is driving me crazy and hopefully someone here can help. For the last week I have been getting this message whenever I open up or refresh BJ.
‘Do you want to open or save analytics.js from a.sitemeter.com?’
Does anyone know how I can get rid of this message?
Botsplainer
@Short Bus Bully:
Halperin will make out just fine in the crash. He is puzzled over why people are upset over these tough choices.
He’s also made my list of “pundits whose skulls meet the sweet spot of my baseball bat” if they get their desired societal collapse. The bat will, of course, be wood, as that is a far more satisfying sound and more appropriate to tradition.
Villago Delenda Est
@Jim, Foolish Literalist:
Lord Voldemort and Gandalf the White.
Julius Caesar and Attila the Hun
Pontius Pilate and Mohammed
Darth Sidious and Gul Dukat.
Mark S.
@Citizen_X:
Yoda=Game Changer
Bill E Pilgrim
@mai naem: You forgot McCain-McCain.
But I don’t like McCain! Don’t you have something without McCain?
(Chorus of Sunday talk show hosts:)
Oh we love McCain! We’re having McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-Bowles-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-Matalin-McCain!
Villago Delenda Est
@Mark S.:
Obi-Wan Kenobi sees Mark Halperin in a bar. Halperin recites his list of people who could cut a deal.
Obi-Wan looks at him hard, and says “You want to go home and rethink your life”.
Halperin says “I want to go home and rethank my wife.”
Obi-Wan facepalms. “I’m not going in there again, it’s pointless and hopeless.”
I'mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet
@rdldot: A quick Google indicates it seems to be a bug that has popped up recently in some Sitemeter stuff. It seems to be restricted to Internet Explorer. The only posted solution seems to be to use a different browser, like Chrome, until it is fixed.
HTH a little.
Cheers,
Scott.
Eric
Peanut butter and jelly. Qed
Villago Delenda Est
@Bill E Pilgrim:
“Matalin is off”
“Well, can I have McCain instead of Matalin then?”
“You want to have McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-Bowles-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain-McCain?”
Villago Delenda Est
@I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet:
Never mind until it is fixed. Never use that damn piece of shit Internet Exploder ever again.
Alex S.
Siskel and Ebert! Sonny and Cher! Matt Santos and Arnold Vinick! Spock and Spock from the Mirror Universe! Head and Desk!
Patrick
Ever since Mark Halperin called the President of the United States the d-word on TV, I could literally give a rats a** what he has to say. My dish rag is more important than little Halperin.
Seriously, he is a disrespectful pundit with an agenda. He is no different than Rush Limbaugh.
Jim, Foolish Literalist
@Patrick: Christ, I’d forgotten all about that. The little half smile on his face like a three year old trying out a swear at his parents’ dinner party.
Professor
@Mike E: That must be good for John McCain!
Bill E Pilgrim
BTW how, pray tell, could two Presidents, in office during different decades not to mention both in the Executive Branch, “negotiate” any sort of “CR/debt deal”?
Or am I looking for too much sense from Halperin, okay, never mind, question asked and answered.
Edit: Or is he suggesting that they could actually negotiate a deal now, as elder statesmen? Which then leads to Prince’s question about how this gets anyone anywhere, okay never mind again. Halperin is not worth the scratching one’s head, any more than it was worth trying to figure out how McCain’s forgetting how many houses he owned on live TV was bad for his opponent in the election.
rdldot
@I’mNotSureWhoIWantToBeYet: ok – thanks. Don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to just google it. Thanks for doing the heavy lifting for me!
Professor
@Jim, Foolish Literalist: Affirmative Action
Patrick
@Professor:
Oh yes, no matter how bad the news was for John McCain, every time Mark “d**k” Halperin would be there claiming it instead was good news for John McCain. And as we know, McCain got slaughtered in the election.
This guy has no credibility whatsoever. He is just a spokesperson for the GOP.
WereBear
Mork and DeMint!
Paula Deen and Neil deGrasse Tyson!
Eric Cantor and a Star-Bellied Sneetch!
Anoniminous
Been looking for a good recent example of the Dunning-Kruger Effect for an upcoming lecture series.
Thanks!
Bill E Pilgrim
A floor wax and a dessert topping!
Less filling and better tasting!
Two girls and one cup!
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
You can’t just make an assertion like that without quantifying how influential it is and offering some evidence. I don’t know anyone who reads The Note.
Jerzy Russian
@WereBear:
OK, that one is just weird.
Bill E Pilgrim
@Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader: I’m pretty sure “read” was past tense there. Halperin doesn’t seem to be involved with it anymore, and yes, a lot of people did read it at one time. None of them include anyone I know personally either, but it was being linked and cited all over the Village at one point.
Edit: Yeah: “In April 2007, Halperin left his post as editor of The Note”
Villago Delenda Est
@Heliopause:
Yes, and remarkably, there are no hot babes in it, it’s more paranoid crap about Obama.
The reason there are no hot babes? They’re all in Obama’s harem, of course.
eyelessgame
Wait. Halperin’s second comment is actually a reply to his own first comment, right?
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
Jack Welch and The Last Unicorn
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
Joe The Plumber and Mr. Goodwrench
Randy P
@ppcli:
I don’t know who Klain is. I read that as Khan (as in Khaaaann!) and thought “yeah, he’d probably be a more good-faith negotiating partner than Cruz”.
@WereBear:
Well since you’re going for classic literature, I’ll say “A North-going Zax and a South-going Zax”
Eric
Pilate and jesus
Brutus and marc antony
Jock and rash
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
Alfred Nobel and The Unabomber
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
Adolf Hitler and Anne Frank
Villago Delenda Est
@Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader:
You just had to go there and bring the wrath of Godwin down on all of us, didn’t you?
WereBear
That human-headed fly from the original The Fly
and
Ronald Reagan’s head in a jar!
gogol's wife
@Heliopause:
It’s much better than the t o e n a i l s.
I like this “pairs” game. Putin and Medvedev, anyone?
Shirley Temple and Jane Withers.
Cary Grant and Randolph Scott.
Ben Cisco (onboard the Defiant)
Sarah Palin and a potted plant.
I’ll take the potted plant plus the points.
Keith P.
This all comes down to Rush Limbaugh’s speech at CPAC a few years ago (the one where he showed up sweaty and bloated to all hell and back with the half-unbuttoned black shirt) where he said compromise meaning the GOP lays down their demands, and the Democrats accept it. That’s what it’s been for the last 5 years.
Professor
@Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader: Anybody knows what happened to Jack Welch?
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
@WereBear: Nice!
Just Some Fuckhead, Thought Leader
@Professor: Judging from this Twitter feed, his Alzheimer’s has good days and bad days.
dmsilev
@Keith P.:
That doesn’t really narrow things down very much.
SFAW
@Keith P.:
Doesn’t really narrow it down, now does it?
ETA: That was too weird. On the plus side, I’m thinking like dms!
dmsilev
@SFAW: Should I be flattered or worried?
SFAW
@dmsilev:
Probably both. My comment was meant as flattery, because I think you’re generally pretty funny (by intent, of course, as opposed to Caribou Klaus Barbie). But it’s probably not a good idea for you to be associated with me, because of … well, ya know … uh, let’s just leave it at that.
Ruckus
@Eric:
Jock and rash
Funny and fitting.
Lurking Canadian
@Heliopause: depending who you ask, that is either zero persons, one person or three persons. I think you’d need to go back to the third century to find somebody who thought it was two.
janut
Joan Crawford and the Pepsi guys.
danielx
Mark (“This is good news for John McCain”) Halperin misses the blindingly obvious, which is that the Republican nihilists in the House aren’t interested in a deal. Their view is that W (He Who Must Not Be Named) is and was a RINO, never mind James Baker or other Republican consigliere/fixers. This is especially true since for them, history began in January of 2009. As far as they’re concerned, the deal is that Obama act like he’s a stand-in for Willard Romney and give them everything they want and they won’t destroy the economy and the country’s international credit.
Until next time. Because their idea seems to be that it’s perfectly okay to do something they know is stupid because they don’t know what will happen and it might all come out okay (much like walking into a room filled with black powder while holding a lit candle).
And why not, says I – what is in the interests of individual members has nothing to do with the country’s best interests. The only thing the likes of Louie Gohmert have to fear is being primaried. The fact that they’re idiots and cruel assholes doesn’t effect their electoral fates, since the worse they are the better their constituents like it. That Louie and his ilk get elected and re-elected say volumes about those constituents…
Keith P.
@SFAW: I was actually going to add “yeah, I know, ‘which one?'” to the bit about Limbaugh, but I think the black shirt appearance may have been unique enough…usually he’s sweaty and bloated in a golf shirt. He did a slimming session shortly after this particular CPAC appearance, too. Not sure what kind of diet he went on (or maybe it was just a few marathon dialysis sessions), but he looked to have dropped 50 or so pounds in something like 6 months. Kind of weight loss you see in alcoholics going cold turkey.
Raenelle
You ain’t gonna learn what you don’t want to know.
Doug Milhous J
@janut:
DON’T FUCK WITH ME FELLAS.
So good. So so good.
SFAW
@Keith P.:
Or speedfreaks. Not that anyone uses that term anymore.
AxelFoley
@mai naem:
I was gonna go with the obvious one–McCain-Feingold.
pseudonymous in nc
The most pernicious bit of Halperin’s nonsense is the idea that policy needs to be placed in the hands of the once-elected and unelected. People like them. In sane countries, policy is decided by the elected.