Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The choice is between normal and crazy.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

The Giant Orange Man Baby is having a bad day.

Republicans don’t lie to be believed, they lie to be repeated.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Ron DeSantis, the grand wizard, oops, governor of FL.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

They think we are photo bombing their nice little lives.

Found liable for massive fraud, is required to post a massive bond, gets a break, then files a *fraudulent* bond!

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

In my day, never was longer.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!

I was promised a recession.

I was confident that someone would point it out and thought why not me.

Don’t expect peaches from an apple tree.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Republican speaker of the house Mike Johnson is the bland and smiling face of evil.

“That’s what the insurrection act is for!”

Glad to see john eastman going through some things.

Prediction: the gop will rethink its strategy of boycotting future committees.

Consistently wrong since 2002

You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2017 / Literal Horse’s Ass

Reader Interactions

165Comments

  2. 2.

    Just the Facts

    CNN analysts–who have exit data they aren’t allowed divulge on air–are sounding like Moore has won.

    And oh look: JD Fucking Vance as a CNN analyst.

  5. 5.

    Schlemazel

    I read the horse thing and he is getting toasted but good! I wish that had come out sooner as THAT probably would hurt him more than pedophilia. CLown looks like a kid riding a carousel.

  7. 7.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Happy Hanukkah, for those who partake.

    And the rest of you, as well!

    Good to see that Roy Moore is getting from the horsey set what Sarah Palin got from actual hunters.

  8. 8.

    Steeplejack (phone)

    I haven’t ridden a horse in 40 years, but I’ve seen a lot of cowboy movies, and Moore is not sitting on that horse right. He looks like he’s either about to fall off or trying to go into recliner mode.

  11. 11.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Just the Facts: Given that the Alabama Secretary of State is going to destroy the election results right after he announces them, this entire thing is tainted. Moore’s votes are as legit as every Trump vote cast in Wisconsin was.

  13. 13.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Steeplejack (phone): I noticed that during the primary when he did the same thing. He does not look comfortable in that saddle.

    ETA: Apparently there’s also now some question as to which horse he was riding. He told the press it was Sassy. But he told the press he was riding Sassy when he did the same stunt during the primary. And the pictures clearly indicate that they’re two different horses.

  15. 15.

    bupalos

    It’s Point-and-Laugh-at-America night in America!! Don’t disappoint us, Amabammy, we know you won’t!!!

  18. 18.

    Kathleen

    @Dorothy A. Winsor (formerly Iowa Old Lady): Al Giordano has some interesting insights on that in his latest newsletter (I get newsletter by donating to his Fund For Authentic Journalism). He says if Moore wins (and he thought he probably would) we Dems need to make Republicans own him at every turn. Al helps me stay focused on the power we have by doing the work, which I really need. While we have to be realistic (and I think Rumara made some excellent points) we have to remember that we have power.

  20. 20.

    Anne Laurie

    From what little I remember about equitation (shut up, almost every little girl goes through a horse-mad phase, even if we only get to read exhaustively), that’s what they call a “pushbutton” horse — one so well trained, all the rider has to do is sit there and not do anything blatantly stupid. He’s doing his best, but he’s really uncomfortable with both his rider and all the media mob. But Ol’ Roy is showing off for the cameras, leaning off-balance, yanking on the poor beast’s mouth, and generally riding like a tv-western actor instead of someone who’s actually acquainted with horseback riding.

    If his family can’t persuade him to give up this brand of idiot showmanship, Moore’s gonna push his luck too far and end up dying after he’s thrown, dragged, and possibly stomped by the animal he’s abusing.

  23. 23.

    Leto

    @schrodingers_cat: That he’s like them “true” ‘Muricans of western spirit, freedom loving, and little one shot gun tottin’ protectors of feedums… and stuff… or something…

  27. 27.

    dexwood

    @Anne Laurie:
    -If his family can’t persuade him to give up this brand of idiot showmanship, Moore’s gonna push his luck too far and end up dying after he’s thrown, dragged, and possibly stomped by the animal he’s abusing.-

    Don’t tease me like that, getting my hopes up.

  28. 28.

    schrodingers_cat

    OT I got an email from SPLC and they are looking for volunteers, mainly lawyers (not necessarily immigration lawyers) because most immigrants up for immigration violations, sometimes facing deportation, go up before an immigration judge without any representation, even children. Link here

  29. 29.

    The Moar You Know

    What a fucking yokehead. Nobody rides horses in the street in Alabama.

    Only place I’ve ever seen horses ridden in the street is, of all places, the beach town in SoCal that I grew up in, and still live in today. Last horses I saw ridden to the beach were probably a decade ago.

  30. 30.

    Anne Laurie

    @Adam L Silverman:

    Apparently there’s also now some question as to which horse he was riding. He told the press it was Sassy. But he told the press he was riding Sassy when he did the same stunt during the primary. And the pictures clearly indicate that they’re two different horses.

    Whatever horse he plants his arse on, that’s Sassy. He doesn’t care enough to distinguish one animal from another (even assuming he’s still cognitively capable of doing so).

    Suspect his family/employees have two or three exquistely trained, similar-enough-for-teevee pintos they can swap out as needed.

  35. 35.

    JoJo

    @Just the Facts: Didn’t we all kind of know that was coming? American conservatism is a cesspit, and has been one for a long time. This is just the latest example. The rest of us will just have to keep fighting.

  39. 39.

    MisterForkbeard

    @Just the Facts: I’m not surprised – it’s Alabama.

    On the other hand, it’s pretty clear we need to kick Alabama out of the country. Possibly into a near-Sol orbit. It’s probably the only way to get it clean again.

  40. 40.

    Just the Facts

    From Benchmark Politics (Shareblue):

    The last statewide poll of Alabama shows Trump at +23% approval rating, but the EXIT polls show a tie in approval rating. This actually shows a very high Dem turnout.

    Hmmm…

    It could also indicate a relatively LOW Rep turnout.

  43. 43.

    MJS

    @JoJo: Jesus, can we at least let the polls close before we begin the post mortem? Or should we just throw the towel in on 2018 while we’re at it, to save time?

  46. 46.

    JPL

    @MJS: Alabama voters have nothing to do with the rest of the nation. Forty-five percent of those who voted did not believe the females. Several more thought he should be forgiven. Truthfully Jones probably lost votes because he convicted Klan members for the Birmingham Church bombing.
    Alabama is a world into its own.

    or at least I hope so.

  52. 52.

    NotMax

    Used to be a politician (also a rancher) here known for being on horseback on the side of the road waving at traffic, in lieu of having sign wavers. So popular (good, progressive guy) that he was overwhelmingly re-elected after dying in a plane crash.

    Community equestrian facility now named in his honor.

    He was never cuckoo enough to ride on the streets. Pick-up with horse trailer used to get to and from his roadside campaigning.

  54. 54.

    Adam L Silverman

    @Anne Laurie: This is the horse he rode for the primary:
    https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/09/alabama-senate-race-live-results-trump-strange-moore/541176/

    Notice it isn’t a paint. He said that was his horse and her name was Sassy.

    This is the horse he rode today:
    http://www.abc15.com/news/national/roy-moore-rides-a-horse-to-the-polls-again

    Which he says is named Sassy. The horse he rode today is the one his wife rode to vote during the primary. So which is it?

  58. 58.

    Roger Moore

    @MJS:

    So the doom foretelling exit polls are incomplete at best.

    The conspiracy theorists will tell you they’re the final numbers the Alabama Secretary of State has cooked up in advance now that he’s allowed to destroy the ballots and prevent any kind of audit.

  59. 59.

    Miss Bianca

    OK, so at first I couldn’t get the Twitter link to upload, so I was wondering WTF everyone was talking about. Then I finally saw it and OMG that man’s seat is TERRIBLE. His hands are BEYOND terrible. Horse Twitter was right to pour scorn on him. He looks like ten pounds of shit in a five-lb bag. It’s a testament to that poor little horse’s training that he didn’t buck the bastard off.

    Seriously, WTF with that dude? Would he ride a motorcycle if he’d never sat on one before? Just a poseur all the way round.

    ETA: Or what Anne Laurie said.

  60. 60.

    MisterForkbeard

    @Adam L Silverman: Like John McCain, he doesn’t know how many horses/houses he owns.

    But back then, the media had the grace to act like maybe he should be embarrassed about it.

  62. 62.

    Another Scott

    @schrodingers_cat: It gives the press something to talk about, something other than their actual policies and positions and likely votes.

    Like Fred Thompson’s pickup truck. Like Scott Brown’s pickup truck…

    :-/

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  67. 67.

    Leto

    @Adam L Silverman: Ah, but if you can do one you should, theoretically, be able to do the other! Also we, royal commenter we, can’t embed tweets like you did (per schrodingers_cat’s comment above). Otherwise everyone would know that my post at 61 is a Ted Cruz knee slapper.

  71. 71.

    Leto

    @Miss Bianca: Apparently he’s been bucked off before:

    Former Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore broke several ribs in a horse-riding accident on Sunday — the same day that former Gov. Bob Riley suffered a similar injury after crashing his motorcycle in Alaska.
    Moore, a Republican candidate for president, was thrown from a horse while riding on his farm near Gadsden in Etowah County, according to Rich Hobson executive director for the Foundation for Moral Law.

    …..

    Hobson said several of Moore’s ribs were broken or cracked. He said Moore was recovering at home and expected to get back on the horse – and the campaign trail – as soon as possible.

    Roy Moore injured in Etowah County horse riding accident June 29, 2011

  72. 72.

    Steeplejack

    @Adam L Silverman:

    It’s like he, or maybe even the saddle itself, is positioned too far back on the horse. And there’s this weird effect where it looks like he’s too big for the horse. Dunno what that’s about. Will wait for the horsey people to weigh in.

  76. 76.

    Schlemazel

    @Adam L Silverman:
    Why not both? I had a friend who used to joke that if he ever cheated on his wife it would be with a woman of the same name so he wouldn’t screw up & call either by the wrong name.

  77. 77.

    Miss Bianca

    @Adam L Silverman: : )

    Yeah, I wish it wasn’t all the right-wing assholes who thought they were making some kind of point about what bad-ass cowboys they are who are the ones riding horses to work. Lefty equestrian Congresscritters, come on! Show ’em how it’s *really* done!

  81. 81.

    GregB

    The saddest part of today us that we don’t have the incisive analysis of Mark Halperin and Harold Ford to look forward to hearing.

    Saw reported exit polling placing African-American voter turnout at 35% and support for Trump at 41%.

    Moore might be in trouble.

  83. 83.

    TenguPhule

    @Anne Laurie:

    If his family can’t persuade him to give up this brand of idiot showmanship, Moore’s gonna push his luck too far and end up dying after he’s thrown, dragged, and possibly stomped by the animal he’s abusing.

    You almost make this sound like a bad thing.

  86. 86.

    Mary G

    @Leto:

    Moore, a Republican candidate for president

    I did not know he ran for president. How far the Republican party has fallen in only six years.

    Commoners like us can embed tweets; the picture or gif or whatever won’t show, but the link does.

    AP: "Shelby County Probate Judge Jim Fuhrmeister says turnout appears higher than normal among young people and black voters in Tuesday's balloting."https://t.co/UCvyrR1iCA— Sahil Kapur (@sahilkapur) December 12, 2017

  89. 89.

    TenguPhule

    @Roger Moore:

    The conspiracy theorists will tell you they’re the final numbers the Alabama Secretary of State has cooked up in advance now that he’s allowed to destroy the ballots and prevent any kind of audit.

    And yet we can’t dismiss them out of hand because this wouldn’t be the least crazy/stupid/illegal shit the Republicans have done this year.

  90. 90.

    PVDMichael

    I’ve convinced myself tonight’s outcomes are win win:

    Jones win. Clearly amazing. There will still be some 51-49 votes but every R Senator can be characterized as the “deciding vote” for whatever nonsense they come up with…

    Moore wins. A milquetoast friend of Mitch will be replaced by a vile monster who will give Mitch occasional grief. The vile monster will be excellent for fundraising and the party of “Trump and Moore” should result in a really large, really female, really Democratic Class of 2018.

  93. 93.

    Yellowdog

    @MisterForkbeard: Phil Ochs wrote a song Heres to the State of Mississippi with the line “Mississippi, find yourself another country to be part of.” I’m sure we can recycle it for Alabama.

  96. 96.

    schrodingers_cat

    BTW another important election is coming up. Assembly elections for Gujarat (Modi’s and Mohandas K Gandhi’s home state) are coming up on the 14th. Modi’s party has slipped in popularity but will that be enough for the opposition to win? My cynical take is that the entire brouhaha about Padmavati movie was to turn out the mouth breathing base. We will see if that worked.

  97. 97.

    JoJo

    @MJS: I hope you’re right. It’s not like my prognosticating skills are very good anyway. I told anyone that would listen that there was no way Trump could actually win the Presidency, and we all know how that turned out. I’ve just been very pessimistic about this particular election in this particular state. I’m far more optimistic about 2018 as a whole.

  98. 98.

    Kathleen

    @rikyrah: That’s exactly what I was thinking. I’m meeting a friend next week who managed campaign for first Democrat to win a position (Clerk of Courts) in the courthouse in 100 years.

    https://courtclerk.org/general-information/about-the-clerk/meet-aftab-pureval/

    I want to pick his brain about supporting voter rights. County Dems are in process of reorganizing. If Dems aren’t best channel, I’m going to approach League of Women Voters. Hamilton County has gone blue in last 3 presidential elections, but I want to make sure voting process is transparent. I thought Al’s thread was so inspiring.

  99. 99.

    smintheus

    The ‘It’s not fair to accuse me after so many years’ defense usually comes into play with:

    a) Nazis who tortured and murdered innocent people
    b) Klansmen who tortured and murdered innocent people
    c) Psychos who tortured and murdered innocent children
    d) Pederasts who were enticed by devious, lustful children

    Which one of those is Roy Moore?

  104. 104.

    Ruckus

    @JoJo:
    They have been digging for a long time, you’d expect them to have hit something by now. As competent as they are we should have expected them to hit cesspool rather than gold.

  105. 105.

    Leto

    @Mary G: Yeah, the regular /link feature works well enough. I just wished for a bit more function here in the comments. No biggie!

  106. 106.

    Kathleen

    @PVDMichael: That was another point Giordano made in his newsletter. If Moore is elected, he will prove to be a royal pain in the ass in his dealings with other Rethugs, especially McConnell.

  111. 111.

    MomSense

    @Anne Laurie:

    My western relatives are cowboys and they already have their 18 month old riding just such a gentle horse. They run a yuuge ranch out in Wyoming. The photos she sends me are incredible. He’s such a little guy to be sitting in the saddle, hands on the reins, and a lasso at his side. I’m amazed they make cowboy boots in his size.

  112. 112.

    MJS

    @JoJo: I don’t know who’s going to win either. I was just commenting on the tendency for knee-jerk pessimism that can sometimes be found here. Trump won the electoral college, not the popular vote. There are real indications that he is dead weight on Republicans right now (Virginia, Oklahoma, etc.). Let’s just see what the voters do.

  117. 117.

    TenguPhule

    @MJS:

    I was just commenting on the tendency for knee-jerk pessimism that can sometimes be found here.

    Speaking of which, the Net Neutrality Vote is in two days.

    Just in case anyone might have forgotten it while we self-crucified ourselves.

  118. 118.

    Schlemazel

    @schrodingers_cat:
    The Trinity ones are Italian made. They take every Western trope to their ridiculous conclusion and are a hoot. The comedy is on purpose but they paly the roles straight

  121. 121.

    Schlemazel

    @?BillinGlendaleCA:
    I didn’t know that. Sounds like fun.

    I had no idea what to expect the first time I saw Blazing Saddles. I knew Brooks so assumed it was a comedy but I was unprepared for it. There was a full house and many time it was impossible to hear the movie for the laughter.

  126. 126.

    JPL

    @MJS: I live in GA and I was thrilled that Ossoff came so close, so I don’t discount the 2018 elections. We might still flip the sixth.

  127. 127.

    Mnemosyne

    @The Moar You Know:

    I live and work near the LA Equestrian Center, and Riverside Drive is still zoned for horses as “Rancho Equestrian.” People ride and drive their horses past my car every day.

    IIRC, Compton also has equestrian zones, which was unexpected given its reputation.

  132. 132.

    KithKanan

    @TenguPhule: I find it amusing that the examples of the Western genre cited so far in this thread are:

    1) A series of westerns produced by Italians, filmed in Spain, and that started with a western shot-for-shot-remake of an Akira Kurosawa film.

    2) A different western remake of a different Akira Kurosawa film.

  135. 135.

    TenguPhule

    @KithKanan: In all fairness, that’s because most of the original westerns are racist and sexist as shit. And Eastwood’s stuff is even worse.

  138. 138.

    Mnemosyne

    @KithKanan:

    1) A series of westerns produced by Italians, filmed in Spain, and that started with a western shot-for-shot-remake of an Akira Kurosawa film.

    2) A different western remake of a different Akira Kurosawa film.

    Yep. I mean, not a single person thought to recommend The Searchers or My Darling Clementine? Not even The Man Who Shot Liberty Valence?

  140. 140.

    Roger Moore

    @TenguPhule:

    Watch the Magnificent Seven to get a better appreciation of the genre.

    I liked the Kurosawa version better. I guess the same could be said of A Fistfull of Dollars.

  143. 143.

    Geeno

    @KithKanan: Yeah – that’s cause the genre in the US was really developed for children – all those Tom Mix films and the like. Sure they later made some where there was swearing, but the themes addressed never really grew up until we got some foreign influence.

  144. 144.

    Mnemosyne

    @TenguPhule:

    I don’t have time to get into it right now because I have to do actual work at work today, but there’s a marked difference between pre-WWII westerns and post-WWII ones, even by the same directors. It’s hard to believe sometimes that the same guy directed Stagecoach and The Searchers.

  147. 147.

    TenguPhule

    @smintheus:

    Has it been proven yet that Moore was a Nazi?

    It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

    Wants to kill gays, hates the American Constitution, wants to reinstitute slavery.

    Walks like a Nazi, Quacks like Nazi….

  150. 150.

    Miss Bianca

    @Mnemosyne: I just watched “The Searchers” and I was appalled at what a sorry piece of trash it was. “Classic” racist, sexist Western garbage. With added “ethnic humor”!

  152. 152.

    debbie

    @Shana:

    I suddenly remembered that song a couple hours ago, and I haven’t stopped snickering since. I wish I knew how to cue it to the clip of Moore’s entrance on hoof, and then send it to my Trumpie family members!

  153. 153.

    TerryC

    I planned and enjoyed an all day birthday event for my 70th last April August. it was my 35th birthday party, because I don’t often have them.

    My neighbor brought over the gentlest of his 24 horses for four hours so that adults and kids could do “pony rides.” Of course, I had to get up on her, too.

    Horses don’t like me but she was okay. My point is that at age 70 I am in pretty good shape, but once up on that horse, I felt pretty weak and unable to adjust my body and so forth.

    Moore was probably barely able to stay up there.

  155. 155.

    Mnemosyne

    @Miss Bianca:

    And yet, compare it to one of Ford’s pre-war Westerns and you’ll see that he was actually struggling with racism in that film even though he managed to perpetuate racist stereotypes at the same time. The “humor” with Look really doesn’t hold up well (to say the least!) but it’s supposed to be a shock for the audience when she gets killed trying to help them that this (to them) adorable character could be killed off. For 1956 audiences, it was like Ford killed off Martin’s dog, and I use that phrase deliberately.

  156. 156.

    Miss Bianca

    @Mnemosyne: I dunno….I’ve seen some John Ford pre-war Westerns. I’d call “Stagecoach”, for example, a superior film in almost all respects – especially acting.

    It’s just that i’ve heard what a masterpeice “The Searchers” was supposed to be my whole life, and I found it a stunningly mediocre film, even compared to other John Ford films. Plot holes and character inconsistencies you could drive a..well, a stagecoach through, for one thing. Plus, those wacky Swedish immigrants! YMMV.

  158. 158.

    B.B.A.

    @TenguPhule: Oddly, the KKK cohort was rabidly anti-Nazi, I think because a lot of Nazis were stinking Catholics in thrall to the Whore of Babylon.

  159. 159.

    No One You Know

    @TenguPhule: Called my representative, who is already a strong NO against the bill, to thank her and her staff for their service. The staffer seemed a little startled! Surprise the people who defend us with appreciation–they get little enough of it.

  161. 161.

    bemused

    @Adam L Silverman:

    The first Sassy probably had had enough and wouldn’t let him get on without doing injury to him.

    I know next to nothing about horses and riding but the first time I saw him ride even I could see he was a terrible rider and I really felt sorry for the horse.

  162. 162.

    piratedan

    speaking on Westerns….

    The Magnificient Seven, yes its an adaptation, but its really a complete film, someone did a great translation of the themes and the scenery and score do make it a classic in its own right…

    Stagecoach, Three Godfathers, The Oxbow Incident are great examples of the genre earlier, High Noon I think stands out as well. In the 60’s there were reflections of the current culture and they became much less black and white on the surface but its hard to pigeonhole anything into a genre that went from Hud and Hombre to Cat Ballou and Paint Your Wagon to recent homages like Silverado.

  163. 163.

    Tony Jay

    @B.B.A.:

    Oddly, the KKK cohort was rabidly anti-Nazi

    Yeah, but if the Klan of the 20’s had ‘better’ leadership, nipped the Stephenson scandal in the bud and harnessed the votes of its members to achieve political power, that anti-Nazi attitude wouldn’t have lasted, not officially at least. Both far-Right factions had far too much to gain from co-operation, and otherwise they had so many hates in common.

  164. 164.

    frosty

    @Mnemosyne: Cat Ballou?

    Or on a more serious note, “Lonely Are the Brave” Kirk Douglas, set in modern (1962) times. I haven’t seen any of the John Ford classics in 30-odd years, so I don’t know how well they’ve held up.

    For a less squinty, cheesy Clint Eastwood western, try “The Outlaw Josey Wales”. Bonus his sidekick is played by Chief Dan George and it’s a relatively true tale of the Kansas-Nebraska wars.

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