• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

In my day, never was longer.

Don’t expect peaches from an apple tree.

Damn right I heard that as a threat.

Republicans are the party of chaos and catastrophe.

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

A lot of Dems talk about what the media tells them to talk about. Not helpful.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

“Squeaker” McCarthy

No offense, but this thread hasn’t been about you for quite a while.

This fight is for everything.

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

Technically true, but collectively nonsense

DeSantis transforms Florida into 1930s Germany with gators and theme parks.

“Can i answer the question? No you can not!”

In after Baud. Damn.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

Republican obstruction dressed up as bipartisanship. Again.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Optimism opens the door to great things.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Republicans in disarray!

I’d like to think you all would remain faithful to me if i ever tried to have some of you killed.

Mobile Menu

  • Winnable VA House Races
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • COVID-19 Coronavirus
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • War in Ukraine
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • 2021-22 Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Past Elections / Election 2018 / Tough as Texas

Tough as Texas

by John Cole|  October 8, 201811:41 pm| 69 Comments

This post is in: Election 2018

FacebookTweetEmail

Behold, the greatest political ad of the cycle:

Teeed.

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Open Thread: Taylor Swift Is No Longer the GOP’s ‘White Goddess’
Next Post: Late Night Horrorshow Open Thread: Nekkid Emperor Accepts the Public Submission of His New Lictor »

Reader Interactions

69Comments

  1. 1.

    debit

    October 8, 2018 at 11:44 pm

    Tough as tissue.

  2. 2.

    skerry

    October 8, 2018 at 11:44 pm

    Fantastic

  3. 3.

    J R in WV

    October 8, 2018 at 11:45 pm

    Great ad, really tough old guy telling it like it is about Ted. Tough as Texas, heh!

  4. 4.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    October 8, 2018 at 11:46 pm

    I think this will make Ted’s rage circuit overload

  5. 5.

    Cacti

    October 8, 2018 at 11:46 pm

    Heidi Cruz is voting Beto.

  6. 6.

    Flanders Other Neighbor

    October 8, 2018 at 11:51 pm

    I know I only grew up in Wisconsin, but he’s got a point. Woodshed.

  7. 7.

    guachi

    October 8, 2018 at 11:55 pm

    Teeed.

    Made me laugh more than it should. Juvenile taunting. Lol.

  8. 8.

    guachi

    October 8, 2018 at 11:57 pm

    Also, the ad works well on the radio.

  9. 9.

    Mike in NC

    October 8, 2018 at 11:59 pm

    Back in 2005 I spent three terrible weeks at Fort Hood in central Texas for a fake Operation Iraqi Freedom exercise where the temperatures were insane. Could barely venture outside during daylight hours it was so damn hot.

  10. 10.

    TomatoQueen

    October 9, 2018 at 12:00 am

    The disclaimer at the end disappoints. I was so hoping it was something from Kinky Friedman.

  11. 11.

    smike

    October 9, 2018 at 12:03 am

    @guachi:
    What better way to treat these “developmentally” challenged assholes? We have obviously treated them as equals for way too long.

  12. 12.

    SRW1

    October 9, 2018 at 12:05 am

    @Cacti:

    She’d have to have Ted around the house for at least a few weeks. Mighty big downside.

  13. 13.

    smike

    October 9, 2018 at 12:07 am

    @Mike in NC:
    It hasn’t gotten any better during the interim.

  14. 14.

    khead

    October 9, 2018 at 12:08 am

    This guy needs to be in the ESPN “C’mon man” segment this weekend.

  15. 15.

    Mary G

    October 9, 2018 at 12:11 am

    Sonny Carl Davies, or ‘Sonny’ as we call him—is actually a Texas treasure starring in Bernie (hence coffee shop), Thelma & Louise, Fast Times at Ridgemont High and many more.Never shy, he speaks his mind. And we love him for it. #BetoForTexas— Anne Bolynn #BOYCOTTNRA? (@RedAnneBolynn) October 9, 2018

  16. 16.

    Omnes Omnibus

    October 9, 2018 at 12:18 am

    @Flanders Other Neighbor: Don’t small talk Wisconsin. Ever.

  17. 17.

    Yutsano

    October 9, 2018 at 12:28 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: I’ll be there in a couple of weeks. Should be fun. Will probably overload on cheese.

  18. 18.

    Omnes Omnibus

    October 9, 2018 at 12:29 am

    @Yutsano: Where?

  19. 19.

    khead

    October 9, 2018 at 12:37 am

    So, Mrs. Khead is still in the hospital. The recovery from her surgery has taken a bit longer than expected. We were watching the Kavanaugh bullshit tonight when a nurse comes in to give meds. The nurse looks up at the TV and asks us if “that woman (Ford) had been arrested yet”. Good thing the nurse wasn’t checking MY blood pressure.

  20. 20.

    Yutsano

    October 9, 2018 at 12:40 am

    @Omnes Omnibus: Milwaukee from the 25th through the 29th. Staying at the Hyatt downtown.

    EDIT: the server issues are coming…

  21. 21.

    ruemara

    October 9, 2018 at 12:41 am

    @khead: Sorry she’s still in hospital. Sorry I wasn’t there to put the nurse in the hospital

  22. 22.

    Aleta

    October 9, 2018 at 12:42 am

    Pieter Hanson @Thatwasmymom
    That was my Mom. Sometimes the people we love do things that hurt us without realizing it. Let’s turn this around. I respect and #BelieveWomen . I never have and never will support #HimToo . I’m a proud Navy vet, Cat Dad and Ally. Also, Twitter, your meme game is on point.

    (The actual guy.)

  23. 23.

    ChrisH

    October 9, 2018 at 12:44 am

    This is the dude from Bernie! The best documentary of East Texas ever.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVmIqRcglvE

  24. 24.

    Mary G

    October 9, 2018 at 12:46 am

    Attention Betty and Adam! This isn’t suspicious at all, no.

    We've now heard from several people that Florida's online voter registration site is NOT letting people register to vote. FL registration deadline is TOMORROW to vote in the Midterms. @mrmidi recorded the error here. This is voter suppression. The state must EXTEND the deadline. pic.twitter.com/IHKeml0QPh— Samuel Sinyangwe (@samswey) October 9, 2018

  25. 25.

    SFAW

    October 9, 2018 at 12:57 am

    I’m appalled at that ad.

    It is SO UNCIVIL! [Not shrill, however. Only the wimmens are shrill. And Kthrugman.]

    Harumph! Strong letter to follow!

  26. 26.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 12:58 am

    @Mike in NC: Stay Phantom Warriors!

  27. 27.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:04 am

    @Mary G: I just checked the site. I’s up and let me check my registration. Since I’ve already got my absentee ballot, I wasn’t too worried. I’m not going to try to register as I’m already registered. So I don’t know what the issue is.

    Given that Hurricane Michael will start impacting the state tomorrow, I wouldn’t be surprised if they extend the registration deadline. Regardless, issues like this are why the Florida Democratic Party is supposed to have a competent chairperson and a high powered attorney.

  28. 28.

    Villago Delenda Est

    October 9, 2018 at 1:08 am

    Tough as a wussy. That’s our Rafael.

  29. 29.

    Doug R

    October 9, 2018 at 1:10 am

    @guachi:

    Also, the ad works well on the radio.

    Brilliant! Buy enough time on TV so that everybody sees it once-then SATURATE radio with it, with the occasional TV buy to reinforce.

  30. 30.

    Mnemosyne

    October 9, 2018 at 1:18 am

    @Aleta:

    That poor bastard. The worst part is that he has brothers who are already planning the many ways they’re going to taunt him about this for the rest of their lives. ?

  31. 31.

    Mike in Pasadena

    October 9, 2018 at 1:22 am

    I love it. Let’s see more ads like this. Kick ass!

  32. 32.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:22 am

    @Aleta:
    https://heavy.com/news/2018/10/pieter-hanson-him-too-himtoo-tweet/

  33. 33.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:23 am

    @Mnemosyne:
    https://heavy.com/news/2018/10/pieter-hanson-him-too-himtoo-tweet/

  34. 34.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:26 am

    Oh joy!

    Video of explosions at ammo depot in Ichnia, Chernihiv Oblast, northeast of Kyiv. 25 km exclusion zone in place, evacuation underway. Such events usually happen summer heat, but weather is cool now. https://t.co/4qmdsqf5l8

    — Euan MacDonald (@Euan_MacDonald) October 9, 2018

  35. 35.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 1:26 am

    @Adam L Silverman: it’s a funny story but I gotta say what we’re all thinking, there’s a reason that guy doesn’t go on solo dates with women, and it ain’t #metoo.

  36. 36.

    cthulhu

    October 9, 2018 at 1:28 am

    @Cacti:

    Heidi Cruz is voting Beto.

    It’s certainly none of my business but I have wondered about their marriage ever since that incident with the trooper finding her upset on the side of the freeway. Given a lot of people say Ted is a challenge to be friends with, I would think being married to him would tend to suck your soul away.

  37. 37.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:30 am

    @Major Major Major Major: It is what it is.

  38. 38.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 1:31 am

    @Adam L Silverman: not that there’s anything wrong with that!

  39. 39.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:34 am

    @Major Major Major Major: Never said there was.

  40. 40.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    October 9, 2018 at 1:36 am

    I’ll be damned

    Taylor Swift’s Instagram Post Has Caused A Massive Spike In Voter Registration
    Swift waded into politics on Sunday with a social media post encouraging her fans to register to vote before it was too late.

    Whatever works…

  41. 41.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 1:42 am

    @Adam L Silverman: didn’t say you did.

  42. 42.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 1:44 am

    We now appear to have empirical evidence of just how stupid Tom Friedman is:

    Wtf? https://t.co/cbHcjPtR1m

    — Noga Tarnopolsky (@NTarnopolsky) October 7, 2018

  43. 43.

    Chetan Murthy

    October 9, 2018 at 1:45 am

    @Adam L Silverman: Wow. that video is deceptive. You watch it and don’t realize it’s so far away (after a while). You see the big burst, so much light, and then things go calmer, and THEN you hear the big boom, and you realize: “wow, the camera is -quite- a distance from the ammo dump and STILL so much light!”

    I immediately wondered how (and even if) firefighters deal with these things. And then thought about fire-fighting such a fire on a ship, where it’s fight it and die, or don’t fight it, and die. Ugh.

  44. 44.

    Mnemosyne

    October 9, 2018 at 1:49 am

    @Adam L Silverman:

    I know — I saw it on Cole’s Twitter feed. That’s how I know his brothers are already planning the taunting to come at the holidays.

  45. 45.

    Shalimar

    October 9, 2018 at 1:51 am

    @Adam L Silverman: “Deleted twitter. Said her account was hacked.”

    Yep. Lies when challenged. His mother is definitely a natural Republican.

  46. 46.

    Mnemosyne

    October 9, 2018 at 1:53 am

    @Major Major Major Major:

    IIRC, Liberace’s mom believed until the day she died that her son had just never met the right woman.

  47. 47.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 1:59 am

    @Mnemosyne: Pet Shop Boys weren’t officially out until ‘94 IIRC.

    ETA: nor was Rob Halford. Judas Priest fans were somehow shocked!

  48. 48.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 2:02 am

    @Mnemosyne: I’ve never met the right woman. I’ve dated a lot of the wrong ones.

    Actually, that’s not quite true. I did meet the right one once. The timing was terrible and we split up about four months later and then I moved away. She got back in touch with me a couple of years later when I was living about 90 minutes to 2 hours away just as I started dating another one of the wrong ones.

  49. 49.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 2:07 am

    @Mnemosyne: I also feel like Liberace’s mom didn’t insist he was a ROCK RIBBED republican UBERMENSCH who can CRUSH FEMINAZIS with his MANLY MAN HANDS

  50. 50.

    Mnemosyne

    October 9, 2018 at 2:08 am

    @Major Major Major Major:

    I’m so old, I remember when Boy George was bisexual and Morrissey was celibate.

  51. 51.

    terry chay

    October 9, 2018 at 2:10 am

    someone needs to front page the #himtoo twitter thread right now.

    it brings a brief bit of horror followed by unending joy.

  52. 52.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 2:12 am

    @Mnemosyne: to be fair it kinda seems like Moz might have actually been a bit celibate.

  53. 53.

    Jay

    October 9, 2018 at 2:14 am

    @Adam L Silverman:

    Gotta try. It’s worth it every day.

  54. 54.

    Mnemosyne

    October 9, 2018 at 2:15 am

    @Major Major Major Major:

    Since it was around 1985, he probably was, if only for safety’s sake. But it was also definitely a dodge to avoid the stigma at the time — I’m not gay, I’m celibate!

  55. 55.

    Jay

    October 9, 2018 at 2:19 am

    @Adam L Silverman:

    Yup.

    The Moustache of Understanding’s Taxi Driver hasn’t ‘spained to him yet that Kashoggi’s in itty bitty pieces, buried out in the desert past Terringua.

  56. 56.

    Major Major Major Major

    October 9, 2018 at 2:19 am

    @Mnemosyne: I’m sure the clinical depression helped too.

  57. 57.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 2:22 am

    @Jay: Every year I was at USAWC I wound up supervising the colonel who was going through a terrible family breakup because of repeated deployments. I ended my last relationship up there when I was asked if I’d deploy for a few months and said yes if USAWC would clear me/deconflict my time – they did – just at the time that the woman I was dating decided to tell me she wanted to accelerate things. At that point I realized I can’t do the work I do and date, be in a relationship, be married. It is not fair to the other person in the relationship that I may well be gone for 3 to 6 to 12 to 24 months at a time and that there’s a real chance I may not come back whole or alive.

  58. 58.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 2:26 am

    @Jay: I wouldn’t eat the kibbeh at any events hosted at a Saudi embassy for a while…

  59. 59.

    Jay

    October 9, 2018 at 2:44 am

    @Adam L Silverman:

    My first marriage, I spent 6 of the first 8 months in Bosnia. Worth every moment until year 10.

    Second marriage, spent 3 weeks out of every month away for 4 years.

    We are now in year 28.

    Worth every moment.

  60. 60.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 2:46 am

    @Jay: That may be, and it may be worth every moment for you and your spouse, but it is not something I can inflict on someone else.

  61. 61.

    Adam L Silverman

    October 9, 2018 at 2:48 am

    And with that, I’m to bed.

  62. 62.

    Mel

    October 9, 2018 at 3:30 am

    @khead: This is when you report the nurse to hospital administration, and refuse to let her back in the room. Had to do that when a night nurse was four hours late with an iv antibiotic that had to be administered every 6 hours, and then told me that it didn’t matter if she forgot to give vital medications because no patient would ever get well unless they, “…prayed and begged Jesus to forgive [them] for being sinners.”. Yeah. Significant other was a lawyer at the time, and went straight to the admin office and lit them up.

    It turned out that she had been a nurse in a long-term care facility, dealing mostly with patients with severe cognitive or physical impairments, prior to starting at the hospital a week earlier. Who knows how many people who couldn’t speak up for themselves she might have been harassing, intimidating, or denying prescribed care to?

    Patients in hospitals and facilities are at the mercy of the caregivers. Most caregivers, esp. nurses, are very compassionate, and understand that the imbalance of power and the natural fear that comes from patients being ill / hospitalized makes it all the more important to keep personal judgments and politics out of patient interactions. Those few that do abuse the siruation need to be called on it, just as we would call an educator or a mental health professional out on that kind of grossly inappropriate, unprofessional behavior.

  63. 63.

    tokyokie

    October 9, 2018 at 4:59 am

    @Mel: IV antibiotics are the ones that are used only when more conventional oral meds do not kill the bacteria causing the infection. They tend to have greater side effects and are much, much more expensive. And they have to be administered according to a strict schedule in order to maintain a constant titer of the medication in the bloodstream before they’re excreted. If the titer level falls below an effective range, the antibiotic doesn’t work, and the infection grows worse. Most facilities allow the med to be given within an hour of the scheduled time, and with, say, a medication that’s administered once a week, being off by a couple of hours is not especially critical. But IV antibiotics? They have to be administered on time, every time. I’m hard-pressed to imagine what the night nurse might have been doing that took precedence over ensuring that an IV antibiotic was infused at the correct time, much less how she could have missed it by four hours.

  64. 64.

    rikyrah

    October 9, 2018 at 8:11 am

    This ad rocks!????

  65. 65.

    John Redford

    October 9, 2018 at 8:46 am

    The ad was directed by Texas’ best director, says the Guardian: Richard Linklater makes anti-Ted Cruz Campaign TV Spot. It’s hard to think of a conservative counterpart to Linklater. Michael Bay, sure, but he’s hardly Texan.

  66. 66.

    tobie

    October 9, 2018 at 9:51 am

    @khead: So sorry to hear about Mrs. khead. I hope she has a speedy recovery and returns home soon. If she’s in the hospital I’m thinking of in our Trump-lovin’ county, god damn. Someone in the hospital administration needs to tell the staff not to talk politics.

  67. 67.

    Mel

    October 9, 2018 at 12:32 pm

    @tokyokie: I am well aware of how antibiotics function, and the importance of timely and consistent administration, especially after dealing for nearly two decadeswith a serious autoimmune condition and with multiple immunosuppressive medications and their ensuing side effects. Hence, our dismay that I was allowed to just sleep, and not given the prescribed dose of antibiotic at the time clearly indicated on my chart.

    We fell asleep, exhausted from the events of the secondary infection which led to my being hospitalized to treat the infection. We assumed that the nursing staffer on duty would behave in a professional manner, and that we would not have to go searching for her when we awoke and realized that a scheduled dose had been completely missed. It was a rural hospital (no excuse) and shortstaffed (also no excuse).

    The nurse in question was suspended pending a hospital investigation, and a second nurse was called up from another unit to immediately administer the medication. In the ensuing 24 hours, we spoke with the hospital administratior, the Human Resources director, and also independently filed a complaint with the nursing board.

    We were informed by the hospital that the nurse in question had been hired after working in a long-term care facility. She was an lpn with no hospital experience. Whether her failure to do rounds and keep to medication schedules was related to laziness, religious objections to standard medical protocols, dislike of a patient who refused to state a religious preference, sociopathy, poor training, or a combination of the above, I cannot say.

    I was personally offended and made extremely alarmed by the fact that a person not professionally or legally qualified to do so was arbitrarily withholding deciding to withhold a prescribed, lifesaving medication, and attempting to justify the behavior by claiming that some sort of religious groveling can cure disease.

    Whatever the reason, she and any other healthcare worker who uses their innate position of power over patients to push a political, religious, or personal agenda needs to be reported and removed from direct patient care.

    The hospital at which the breach of care I encountered occurred agreed, and took immediate action, although I often wonder if a patient who was seriously ill and alone, without a loved one with a law degree present to advocate for them, would have been able to get that kind of immediate, thorough, transparent response.

  68. 68.

    J R in WV

    October 9, 2018 at 12:59 pm

    My wife spent 3 weeks in ICU on a vent with septic shock/pneumonia and serious lung infection requiring surgery. Then nearly 2 months recovering enough to be sent home. In all that time there was one nurse who was insufferable, she was the only one who wore a traditional white uniform with cap and all in the ICU to care for patients. Wouldn’t allow me to be with my wife, unlike 100% of the other nurses, who were ex-military men.

    I am certain the white uniform was deliberate in an attempt to avoid caring for patients in messy situations. At the end of her shift she left without notifying me (waiting in the ICU waiting room) that she was done with the difficult procedures that required her to keep me from my wife’s side, where I otherwise spent 18 hours a day. Don’t know her, wouldn’t recognize her, hope she finds another career more suitable for her skills, like repo of nice cars not being paid for.

  69. 69.

    Mel

    October 9, 2018 at 1:59 pm

    @J R in WV: Wow. I am so sorry that you guys had to deal with that, especially in the midst of such a truly frightening illness.

    I’m sure that your wife has told you a million times, but I just want to say it one more time: thank you for being there for her.

    When you are that ill, and that frightened, knowing that you have someone who loves you, even if they are temporarily on the other side of the door, can mean the difference between losing hope and fighting on. It means the world.

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

VA Purple House Delegates

Donate

Political Action

Postcard Writing Information

Recent Comments

  • Carlo Graziani on War for Ukraine Day 584: Congressman Quigley Votes No! (Sep 30, 2023 @ 7:09pm)
  • Sherparick on Meet Callie Cole (Sep 30, 2023 @ 7:09pm)
  • Andrya on War for Ukraine Day 584: Congressman Quigley Votes No! (Sep 30, 2023 @ 7:06pm)
  • Alison Rose on War for Ukraine Day 584: Congressman Quigley Votes No! (Sep 30, 2023 @ 7:05pm)
  • Another Scott on Cold Grey Dawn Open Thread: Sheriff Elon, Border Enforcer (Sep 30, 2023 @ 7:05pm)

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
We All Need A Little Kindness
What Has Biden Done for You Lately?

Balloon Juice Meetups!

All Meetups
Talk of Meetups – Meetup Planning

Fundraising 2023-24

Wis*Dems Supreme Court + SD-8

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Mailing List Signup
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)

Twitter / Spoutible

Balloon Juice (Spoutible)
WaterGirl (Spoutible)
TaMara (Spoutible)
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
TaMara
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
ActualCitizensUnited

Join the Fight!

Join the Fight Signup Form
All Join the Fight Posts

Balloon Juice for Ukraine

Donate

Cole & Friends Learn Español

Introductory Post
Cole & Friends Learn Español

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2023 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!