A former Department of Justice employee who threw a sandwich at a federal agent during Donald Trump’s law enforcement surge in Washington DC was found not guilty of assault by a DC jury on Thursday in the latest legal rebuke of the federal intervention.
As George Conway versified: [Warning! That link goes to Conway peforming what follows in a rendition that is not for the faint of ear.]
I threw the sandwich, but I did not throw the condimentsI threw the sandwich, but I didn’t throw the condimentsAll around Washington D.C.They’re trying to track me downThey say they want to bring me in guiltyFor the spilling of some mayonnaiseFor wasting all the dijon, but I say
I threw the sandwich, but I swear it had bad provoloneI threw the sandwich, and they say it is a capicola offenseJudge Pirro always hated meBecause she thought I stole her wineEvery time I poured a glassShe said, give me that, it’s mineShe said, all of that wine is mineAnd I sayI threw the sandwich, but I did not throw the condiments, oh noI threw the sandwich, but I didn’t throw the condiments, oh no



