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You are here: Home / Most Pathetic Groan Yet

Most Pathetic Groan Yet

by John Cole|  November 7, 20046:38 pm| 11 Comments

This post is in: Democratic Stupidity

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This may be the most pathetic editorial wheeze I have seen post-election (via e-mailer Dave):

It’s near midnight Tuesday as I write this, and Dubya is in the fast lane back to the White House. I wish I could say I’m surprised or disappointed in my country. The truth is that I’m neither. The U.S. electorate performed as I knew it would, despite my protestations of hope and glimmers of optimism. I’m resigned — not to the idea of a neocon nation but to the fact that I will always feel alienated from the country I live in but can no longer consider my home. Home? That’s where you feel welcome. I don’t feel welcome in the United States right now. Home? That’s where you feel safe. I’ve never felt more threatened.

We are officially a minority, folks. We’ve always known that San Francisco was an oasis. Now we’re forced to acknowledge that it’s a ghetto, too. Look at the electoral map. We’re like a coastal preserve filled with threatened species: feminists, queers, liberals, leftists, pacifists, intellectuals, environmentalists, libertarians, people who drive hybrids.

That threatened group of Prius owners. The author also directs us to this hysterical website- Marry an American. Enjoy.

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Reader Interactions

11Comments

  1. 1.

    Dave Schuler

    November 7, 2004 at 7:04 pm

    I guess the lack of intellectuals on the Right is the reason that the Left has been intellectually bankrupt for the last 30 years.

  2. 2.

    DJ

    November 7, 2004 at 9:41 pm

    She does realize that Marry An American is parody, right?

  3. 3.

    DJ

    November 7, 2004 at 9:42 pm

    Crap, I meant it was satire. Not parody. Whatever.

  4. 4.

    shark

    November 7, 2004 at 10:14 pm

    We’re like a coastal preserve filled with threatened species: feminists, queers, liberals, leftists, pacifists, intellectuals, environmentalists, libertarians, people who drive hybrids.

    Too bad we can’t float them on an ark like Noah and reclaim SF as well….

  5. 5.

    Kimmitt

    November 7, 2004 at 11:24 pm

    That threatened group of Prius owners.

    It’s called “humor.”

  6. 6.

    mike from oregon

    November 8, 2004 at 1:38 am

    One man’s oasis, is what level headed Americans call a cesspool. Of course when you wake up every day and your sensibilities are constantly challenged and assaulted, eventually you get sucked in (no pun intended). The poor guy is about a deluded as they come.

  7. 7.

    Harry in Atlanta

    November 8, 2004 at 9:03 am

    “We’re like a coastal preserve filled with threatened species: feminists, queers, liberals, leftists, pacifists, intellectuals, environmentalists, libertarians, people who drive hybrids.”

    He forgot dumbasses, nitwits, closet jagoffs, sissies, sitz-pinklers, losers, wankers, crybabies, assholes, and condescending dipshits. There are some more but I’ve wasted about as much time as I am on this self-righteous turd’s blubbering.

  8. 8.

    Harry in Atlanta

    November 8, 2004 at 10:55 am

    Oh, I forgot felchers.

  9. 9.

    Sandi

    November 8, 2004 at 11:55 am

    -MIke from Oregon said:

    “One man’s oasis, is what level headed Americans call a cesspool.”

    Here is a map of the Oasis/cesspoll for the [supply word here] donks.

  10. 10.

    CadillaqJaq

    November 9, 2004 at 10:41 am

    Sandi, Michael Moore has construed a similar map… the Northern area in blue is referred to as “The United States of Canada.” The Southern area below is referred to as “Jesusland.”

    I guess he thinks that’s humorous. Al Francken would too I suppose. Yeah, everybody,let’s reach out to these folks and practice uniting rather than dividing. Where’s my olive branch?

Comments are closed.

Trackbacks

  1. American RealPolitik says:
    November 8, 2004 at 5:14 am

    I Groan in Unison with John Cole

    I was going to comment on this pathetic essay when I saw it over on Ballon Juice but as I typed I felt the bile rise…and now I have to

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