Mark Halperin has outdone himself today, claiming that the McCain housing gaffe is bad for Obama.
No. Seriously:
For service to the cause, it is with much pride that I award you the Second Golden McPenis, for meritorious service to McCain’s scrotum. Well done, Mark. You earned it.
Congratulations.
TR
When Cokie and George S. are openly scoffing at you, you know you’ve outdone yourself. What a fucking idiot.
Davis X. Machina
Halperin: fellacious, or fallacious? Fallacious, or fellacious?
It’s so hard to make the call….
Jake
He’s either a pure schill for Team McCain, or simply not that bright (or both). At least his nonsense got a little pushback from the other folks on the panel. Still, Cokie concludes by saying that it’s a close election and so of course all this kind of stuff is going to be used. Of course. Because everyone knows they wouldn’t be used in an election that wasn’t close. Christ she’s dumb.
Such a transparent line from Team McCain. They’re just looking for excuses to use all kinds of crap against Obama. “Well we really don’t want to use this stuff, because, you know, John’s an honorable POW, but the Obama campaign is really forcing our hand here.”
I think we can anticipate a new stunt each day this week from Team McCain, to try to get equal coverage on the nets. Look for them to release a new attack ad each day, picking on whichever convention speaker utters anything that could be remotely considered a slight.
maxbaer (not the original)
It’s too bad that Barack has forced McPOW to go negative.
smiley
Just shows you how much real damage the McCain camp thinks housegate has done. Good. Keep at it Team Obama. Halperin is clearly in the tank for McCain.
GSD
Halperin not only deserves the Golden McPenis for that performance, he also deserves several Oak Leaf Clusterfucks.
That was some audacious McBush fluffery.
-GSD
anne
Yeah, it’s pretty much everything IS EXCELLENT NEWS!… FOR JOHN MCCAIN!!
Barbar
Halperin is a graduate of Harvard College.
Dennis - SGMM
Doesn’t the “look what you made me do” argument kind of undercut McCain’s image as an iron-willed POW? Just askin’.
Jake
So is Bill Kristol. Apparently that school’s a douchebag magnet.
NR
Josh Marshall had the best response to this I’ve seen:
Dennis - SGMM
OTOH, Frank Rich in NYT, Last Call for Change We Can Believe In
Jim Henley
Mark Halperin needs to realize that, Bush-lawyer apologetics aside, brainboarding is torture. Stop brainboarding me, Mark Halperin!
NewUnansweredQuestions
First, the McCains remind us that we have to count the Hanoi Hilton first among the array of McCain homes that are important here.
Second, I confer the First And Maybe Last TZ Award for Meritorious Use of a Golden Phallus in a Graphic Presentation in a Political Blog.
Kudos. This is fine work, and I tip the TZ cap to you.
Robert M.
Consider the application of Halperin’s logic to McCain’s foreign policy:
dr. bloor
Halperin is a typical case of a guy who’s not all that clever to begin with trying to be too clever by half, which results in…I dunno, 3/8ths clever? In this particular case, he’s also trying to prove how big his journalistic penis is by being boldly contrarian.
That quick shot of Cokie’s reaction is priceless–“I can’t believe there’s someone dumber that I am sitting at this table.”
NewUnansweredQuestions
This is called Damning With Faint Praise.
But actually, this remark is a Slap In The Face to all dumb people. She’s not just dumb, she’s Olympic Gold Dumb.
smiley
OT. Sorry but I’ve gotten hooked on reading the stupid over at TalkLeft (I blame John). From comments:
The Other Steve
Send feedback to ABC.
Nothing rude, just point out that halperin is an embarassment and a joke.
Darkness
God, I love that trophy. As much as I would like to peer at its amusing aspect more often, thanks for keeping it in reserve and maintaining its integrity.
With a trophy like that, integrity is key.
You must move in very livable circles. I discovered this eons ago. And, frankly, anywhere Bush II got a degree is a useless pust-oozing scab on the backside of higher education.
“Oh, I went to Yale.”
“Ah, they gave Bush a degree. So, I should trust your credentials . . . why?”
Come to think of it McSame may have caught on from Bush I in terms of furtherance of his offspring’s future, by paying extra big bucks to their private schools to grease the way for them.
Jake
Some of us should sockpuppet and see how far off the stupid ledge we can walk the folks over at TalkLeft. Let’s face it, we’ve no chance of convincing them they’re wrong, so we might as well have some fun and go the other way.
Someone should suggest, for example, that this whole thing got started when NASA decided to fake the moon landing.
jrg
Shorter Halperin:
“The fact that McCain does not know how many houses he owns is great news for McCain, because otherwise I never would have taken this opportunity to mention Rezco or Wright.”
See? Even when the GOP engages in racist BS and guilt by association, it’s still the Dem’s fault.
I’d like to take this moment to remind everyone that John Kerry’s war record would have never have been attacked had he not run for president as a Democrat.
smiley
Go for it. Unfortunately, however, after they go over the stupid ledge they’d land on the batshit crazy ledge that is NOQUARTER. I refuse to click on links to that site anymore.
DougJ
Do you guys ever read back issues of The Note (when Halperin was writing it)? Some of the stuff is just amazing:
Here’s a personal favorite (describing an answer Bush gave to a question at a presser in January 2006:
What’s remarkable is that someone this dumb is so familiar with obscure Bruce Springsteen and Elvis Costello lyrics.
DougJ
Sorry I forgot the link. LINK.
jake
[Wipes grape juice off monitor]
Awesome. You might want to go ahead and make a new tag for Journalistic Integrity, Service & Merit, John. It’s going to get worse. Much worse.
With a bit more respect the poster will even spell her name correctly. Damn people, leave them rats alone.
rob!
do the kneepads Mark Halperin uses have the McCain ’08 logo on them?
Dreggas
You know what irritates me. I visited the vietnam memorial in washington when I was a kid. I bought a POW/MIA t-shirt to support the vets. It was one of the few times I saw my father get teary eyed (he’s a Vietnam vet too). McCain has so cheapened the memory of the 55k + names on that wall with his Hanoi Hilton shit that he should be tied to a pole and bitch slapped by every Vietnam Vet still alive.
DougJ
I went there and the place is most certainly a douchebag magnet. I’m not even sure “magnet” captures how powerfully it pulls douchebags in.
Libby
Warning: Blogwhore because I’m too lazy to get the link directly to the video. The Jed Report keeps putting on the hits. Meet Mr. McMansion.
sparky
i think ABC rather than Halperin deserves the award. after all, they are paying him.
Halperin’s just doing what courtiers have been doing since, oh, forever: flattering his owners, bamboozling the public.
besides, awards like this will only encourage further relentless lickery. sad when you see so many bright people think the way to get ahead is to continue to lick someone else’s whatever.
Singularity
Sadly, for a lot of his generation (and mine), that sort of pop-culture awareness is what passes for intellectual acuity. It’s what happens when people watch Kevin Smith movies and read “High Fidelity” and mistake witty for wise. It’s good to know all the words to “Allison” but it doesn’t make you Mencken.
DougJ
Sadly, for a lot of his generation (and mine), that sort of pop-culture awareness is what passes for intellectual acuity. It’s what happens when people watch Kevin Smith movies and read “High Fidelity” and mistake witty for wise. It’s good to know all the words to “Allison” but it doesn’t make you Mencken.
Did you just wander in here from the University of Chicago Committee on Social Thought or something?
evap
Even Georgie Boy was taken aback by Halperin’s comments. And was it just Halperin, or did Cokie actually sound less idiotic than usual?
Libby
Oh, and just a stray thought, but shouldn’t wankery like Halperin’s get some kind of limp dick award? Your trophy, which is beautiful, is almost too good for him.
Dennis - SGMM
Where do I sign? Are you going to start a separate sign-up for those vets of Iraq and Afghanistan? McCain has been writing a lot of checks on their service while attempting to deny them benefits with his Senate votes.
Michael57
In fairness to fair Harvard, I believe a Senator Obama spent some time there as well.
Douchebags are found everywhere. Harvard is only relevant ot Halperin because you don’t necessarily associate stupidity with the Ivies, that’s all.
The Dangerman
I swear, I was watching, and the moment George Will started talking, I hit the mute and didn’t hear this shit live. What a fucking idiot.
It’s coming. Team Obama is going to say something about something about, say, diversity and Team McCain is going to respond by yelling “N***er” and then blame Team Obama for making them do it.
Mr. Tactful
Hey, I found out the REAL reason Obama chose Biden:
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2067218/posts
Thank God for FreeRepublic.
myiq2xu
Isn’t that the purpose of this place?
Tim (The Other One)
“Halperin is a graduate of Harvard College.”
So much for that Ivy League “bump” !
Jake
Oh goody, the resident asshat makes an appearance.
colleeniem
Speaking of stupid, when I listened to some Repubs talking today, (Tim Paulenty (sp?) and Arlen Specter), defending McCain, they both brought up McCain’s experience as a POW being the hardship that defines him, and how that experience makes him able to connect to the common man.
This is beyond self-parody. This a full-blown meme gone deliciously haywire.
wobbly
Jeez, not one of these candidates EVER attended a public high school, let alone graduated from one.
All hot house plants.
smiley
Sorry to go OT again in this thread but there’s another pro Obama music video out by Dave Stewart. Claims it’s not an endorsement. Yeah right.
Joshua Norton
Why? According to all of them, nothing that happened to him was “torture”. Just a little frat hazing. Their definition, not mine.
Ninerdave
Halprin doesn’t need knee pads, his knees are toughened up from years of slurping on the current presidential p*nis (don’t wanna get modded!).
He had the logo tattooed directly onto his knee cap.
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
His guards in the Hanoi Hilton were common men – it’s hard to imagine he took a shine to the “common man” as a result.
The logical deduction is that he want to “connect” with the common man alright dontcha know – he wants to kill us all.
Except for the ones who draw crosses in the dirt. They get a free pass.
bufoboreas
Halprin is very deserving of the prestigious McPenis. However, let’s not forget George Will in the segment before the one posted. George decided with regard to Homegate that the all Presidential candidates are wealthy and it is time to move on. He apparently forgot that we only move on when a Republican is dinged for hypocrisy and the big lie. We only move on after we all know that Edwards has a 24,000 sq/ft home and therefore, can’t talk about poverty, that Gore can’t talk about energy because he has a 10,000 sq/ft home, Kerry is a kept Frenchman etc, that Obama can’t talk about anything because he is a smartypants argula eating, latte drinking elitist. Now that people are hearing about McCain’s cappucinos, ferragamos, his prenup etc, its time to focus on the issues. By the way, did you know he was a POW?
Dennis - SGMM
Who among us hasn’t confessed to waging germ warfare?
dave
The Other Steve: Thanks for the link. I took a brief break and left a comment there. It probably won’t do much good…after all, how long have we been politely pointing out that Halperin, in a just world, couldn’t get a job with “MY Weekly Reader”, and yet, there he is, week after week, on The Mouse Network’s flagship Sunday yak show. Still, as many as possible need to write in, if only to show the network suits that their Sunday morning audience isn’t just composed of comatose victims of Saturday night’s binge drinking.
Maxwel
How about fellacious fluffery.
J. Michael Neal
You clearly haven’t dealt with enough people from
DartmouthFaber College.Jon H
“In fairness to fair Harvard, I believe a Senator Obama spent some time there as well.”
The mileage definitely varies. Kristol got his BA and PhD from there. Bush got an MBA there. Even Susan fucking Estrich edited the law review.
On the other hand, the students, professors, and postdocs I work with at the medical school are sharper than hell.
Glen
John,
Your handsome statue should go for good fellatio. Halpern’s performance was more like the, “Ow! Jebus! Get off my d**k you clumsy whore!” variety.
Jon H
Halpern’s statue should feature a Candiru fish.
pansypoo
kookie didn’t agree with him?!?!?
jake
Most people come by empathy naturally. John McCain had it beaten into him with a rubber hose.
What.
The.
Tap-dancing.
Pyrotechnic.
Fuck?
Yes, I know there are Americans who have absolutely shitty lives but unless I’ve missed something it isn’t common for Americans to be treated like POWs during Vietnam. I thought the thing about being a POW (or at least a POW named John McCain) was it was an unusual experience that no one could possibly really understand unless they’d experienced the same thing. Sort of laying in the crypt for three days. Now we learn that being a POW is just like struggling to pay the bills. Or something. Anyway, being a POW trumps the heiress wife and more houses than one can count. Vote McCain, he’s just like you, DON’T ASK QUESTIONS, YOU’LL INSULT THE POW!
Holy fuck. I can’t wait until McCain tells a group of pregnant women that he understands hard labour or that nine months of being unable to move around is nothing. He once spent five years being unable to move around!
Libby
I believe I read that there were 600 other POWs. As Avedon pointed out the other day, if that’s the criteria, we should start vetting them. There’s bound to be a few who are much better candidates than McInsane.
Just Some Fuckhead
hehe
abiodun
Jake-
I’ll take both:
1-the guy is not that bright
2- He is a McCain shill
Davis X. Machina
“
Comparative linguists might want to note how strongly typed English is for word order, since “Ow! Jebus! Get my d**k off, you clumsy whore!” is a completely different sentence, by virtue of moving just one word just one space in sequence.
(See, children, this is why grad school is a very, very bad thing…)
PeterJ
600? Forget about just the presidency. We should fill all the top spots in the three branches with former POWs.
Nine for the Supreme Court, 535 for Congress, and lets say 25 for the presidency.
And there might even be enough left to replace some of the media bobbleheads.
Just Some Fuckhead
Yawn.
chopper
BTW, people don’t seem to remember that mcthuselah was pimping the POW creds far earlier in the year. from a GOP debate in january:
(note: the question is about the economy. ECONOMY.)
so let me translate: POW. POW. POW. islam is scary. the democrats are traitors. POW. reagan is teh awesome, and also POW.
Heshe
Don’t forget to dip the award in shit before you send it.
harlana pepper
That was pure delusional gibberish.
John McCain
Umm.. John McCain’s you know what is a lot smaller and wrinklier than the one on that gold award. :D
smiley
Don’t remember where I got this (maybe here, maybe Avedon) but check this out.
harlana pepper
Apparently, Ron Fournier is a Harvard man of sorts.
Jake
He seems to have this tendency to repeat lines. It’s like a little tic he has.
“I know how to win wars. I know how to win wars.”
It’s a dead giveaway that he’s lying through his yellow, POWed teeth.
Rick
It’s time to resurrect the long ignored KEATING FIVE SCANDAL, and McCain’s slap-in-the-face discipline issued by his peers in the U.S. Senate. Kind o’ makes Obama’s supposed ties to Tony Resko seem trivial. St. John has too many exploitable, gaping chinks in his armor to go around throwing his unbearable fits of faux moral indignation. Just another Republican “hero” with clay feet.
Just Some Fuckhead
Odd that, since McCain’s contribution to the only war he served in was to get shot down and make propaganda videos for the enemy. Maybe he’s touting his success helping the North Vietnamese drive us out of Vietnam?
D0n Camillo
Who won the first? If it wasn’t Ron Fournier, I hope John is working on sculpting a third McPenis.
jake
And one POW to rule them all and in darkness bind them.
w vincentz
If he knows how to “win wars”, “win wars”, how come the “surge” that has been soooo successful (doncha know?), the surge, my friends, that’s been so important to “winning” the “war” (occupation) in Iraq…hey, it worked dammit, so how come there are still about 145,000 US troops there? If they’ve “won”, shouldn’t there be some parades here in the USA?
On a side note…though I didn’t go to Harvard, do you think that if I shove a five pound bag of russet potatoes up my butt, I can get on tee-vee like Halperin too?
KRK
Have to share a funny comment from this thread at The Field:
Though I think a subliminal “O DAMN” might have been intentional.
DougJ
Doesn’t mean they’re not douchebags.
Jon H
“Doesn’t mean they’re not douchebags.”
I don’t consider douchebags to be ‘sharper than hell’.
Jon H
“Doesn’t mean they’re not douchebags.”
Also, the thing with douchebags is that their lazy douchebaggery eventually dulls whatever mental ability they originally had.
That kind of laziness might work with the Weekly Standard, NRO, or in dealing with the Texas legislature, but it doesn’t work in neuroscience.
rumpole
Doug Feith just got dethroned.
t jasper parnell
OT: John McCain defends himself from charges of carpetbagging in 1982:
See, he never traded on his POW status to overcome legitimate criticism, cause he’s all reticent and manly.
LiberalTarian
OK, watched it.
So, Mr. Halperin, what will McPOW come back with when the ads start regarding his voting against bills to help veterans or McPOW’s skipping votes altogether on vet issues?
McCain’s whole “I lived in a box as a POW” does nothing for the hundreds of thousands of vets who have lived in a box under freeways at home in their own country because their government has broken faith with them. Shit, it has only been recently our government admitted the harm that Agent Orange did to exposed soldiers. (Wait, did they actually admit it???) And, what about Iraq’s vets with PTSD? What has McPOW ever done for them???
Jeez. I can’t get that clip out of my mind. What a bunch of cheeze whiz masquerading as informed comment. :(
lampwick
We’ve all been Prisoners Of W for the past eight years; doesn’t that count for something?
LiberalTarian
Crap. I wish we could edit. :(
manahmanah
KRK-
OBAMA/BIDEN = BABE DOMAIN
Its the secret plan to secure women voters.
Downpuppy
McCain – from Vietnam to Bomb bomb bomb Iran – has built his entire career on the notion that bombing is a good thing. Now he switched – will anybody notice?
(Of course not, but I couldn’t help asking)
David
Shouldn’t there be a “This post is GREAT NEWS for John McCain” tag?
dmsilev
Preach it.
And the next time McCain says that he worked with Jim Webb to bring about a new GI Bill, Webb should stand up and say “John McCain is lying. He worked to defeat the new GI Bill, saying that it was too generous to our troops. Then he didn’t even have the guts to show up and vote on the final bill. Now, he’s trying to take credit for something he opposed. Is this John McCain’s idea of straight talk?”
-dms
Will Hunting
Let’s go up to Hahvad and beat up some smahht kids.
Mainieac
All I want to know is if Obama is going to run aggressive, assholistic ads during the Republican convention like the Republicans are doing for the Democratic convention.
Libby
That one has been making the rounds Smiley. I saw it. I got a new one today while I was surfing, from 2000 when Rove no doubt doing the oppo for the media. Check this out. Excerpt:
The instructor added that McCain was “positively one of the weakest students to pass our way, and received consistently poor marks and a number of Dangerous Down grades assigned by more than one instructor. He had no real ability and was clearly out of his element in an airplane, and way over his head even as a junior naval officer.”
“McCain had roughly 20 hours in combat,” explains Bill Bell, a veteran of Vietnam and chief of the U.S. Office for POW/MIA Affairs — the first official U.S. representative in Vietnam since the 1973 fall of Saigon. “Since McCain got 28 medals,” Bell continues, “that equals out to about a medal-and-a-half for each hour he spent in combat. There were infantry guys — grunts on the ground — who had more than 7,000 hours in combat and I can tell you that there were times and situations where I’m sure a prison cell would have looked pretty good to them by comparison. The question really is how many guys got that number of medals for not being shot down.”
The guy crashed three planes, ruined another by flying too low and hitting power lines and one exploded on deck. It didn’t say it in this piece, but I feel sure I read somewhere that it happened because he was screwing around instead of taking off like he was supposed to.
I don’t really want to diminish his service though. He served honorably. It’s just that it wasn’t particularly exemplary or notable. He served, just like thousands of others who probably deserve even more honor than he does. That’s what really pisses me off when he plays the POW card.
D-Chance.
Away in a manger, no crib for His bed… and, yes, K-Lo’s kids are already on it.
t jasper parnell
McCain on the Foreestal:
via
w vincentz
Sooo…If I get shot down while committing genocide on a civilian population (Hanoi- Operation Rolling Thunder), get captured and later hang “war hero” on myself, can I run for President too?
Martin
You know when McCain couldn’t vote on vet issues? When he was a POW held against his will. Are you attacking his service?
And do you know when he didn’t get any vet benefits? Yep. When he was a POW. And look at him now – almost President. Clearly these benefits are unnecessary.
See how easy that is? Geez. Get with the program.
Wes
Damn! I miss all the great new features. Who won the first Golden McPenis?
Mike G
That kind of laziness might work with the Weekly Standard, NRO, or in dealing with the Texas legislature, but it doesn’t work in neuroscience.
The advantage of working in a technical/scientific field is that the proportion of douchebags tends to be lower than in fields like law, politics, management and sales.
If you’re a fast-talking incompetent, you’ll be found out pretty quickly in a field where you can’t bullshit your way past bad results.
zuzu's petals
Well, except that the Reagans thought you were a scumbag for walking out on your wife and kids.
LA Times
Dennis - SGMM
McCain commanded VA-174 (Attack Squadron 174) then located at NAS Cecil Field, Florida. The squadron’s job was to train to train pilots and maintenance personnel transitioning to the Navy’s A-7 attack aircraft from the A-4. The squadron did not deploy outside of Cecil Field although detachments were sent for pilot carrier qualification to carriers at sea.
VA-174 was the Navy’s biggest squadron at the time that McCain commanded it. When McCain took command, the training syllabuses for pilots and maintenance personnel had already been developed, the procedures and the table of organization were in place. McCain took his place in a smoothly running machine.
In his autobiography, McCain claims that he took bold steps to improve the readiness of the squadron. Here’s an excerpt from an article in the LA Times regarding that claim:
I was in NavAir in the late Sixties and early Seventies. I served a tour with the Brown Water Navy in the Mekong Delta. McCain is one of the small number of Naval Aviators who were known as asshole pilots – not because of their personalities but because they were careless and thoughtless. McCain has wrapped himself in the mantle of the POW. Fine, except that there were over 600 other Vietnam war POW’s, all of whom were tortured and most of whom did not find it necessary to confess to practicing germ warfare or other atrocities.
jake
People who supposedly support someone with the last name of Clinton should just shut the hell up.
Bootlegger
That stuff on military.com is just too much. If The Whippersnapper were so inclined he could so easily throw McCain under the swiftboat (excuse the mixed methaphors). But I think this is one punch he won’t throw, instead it seems he actually does more damage by not throwing it when evyeone knows he can.
xephyr
Mark Halperin, what a lying sack of unpatriotic crap. A pox on his house.
HRA
Other POWs were imprisoned a lot longer than McCain. One of them has written about his being at the Naval Academy with him and already having been in the Hanoi Hilton 3 years before McCain was brought there. BTW, he was not the only one there longer than McCain. Yes, the POW usage is getting on a lot of people’s nerves.
As for Halperin, I knew he was a McCain supporter the first time I saw him on MSNBC. All I can say is if McCain stops too quickly they will have to remove Halperin out surgically.
jbarntt
Dear John Cole,
Even the Democratic Underground seldom gets to the idiocy of your post.
McCain’s scrotum
Are you serious ? Your post would argue against it. In fact your post would argue that you are a partisan hack without a single brain cell.
Good God man, come to your senses.
Your interest in McCain’s private parts is interesting; it says something about you, but nothing about him.
Delia
He couldn’t help being a scumbag. He’d been a POW, you know.
sarsipius
Win.
TenguPhule
That’s between you and Fuckstain, jbarntt.
cmorenc
George W. Bush is an Ivy (Yale undergrad, Harvard MBA) but OTOH he got into both programs back in the era when being a legacy (Yale) and having powerful family connections (Harvard) were far more potent forces toward overcoming otherwise mediocre qualificatons and intellect. IN SHORT back forty years ago, the Ivies had an affirmative action program for stupid people from powerful families, the better to support the endowment with.
Nowdays there still is something of an a.a. program for bright kids with connections – but in an age when the Ivies could select any one of a half-dozen kids with equally strong paper qualifications, all it will do is, assuming you can pass the threshhold to be among that half-dozen, give you a huge leg up to be the one among them handed the prize slot.
Douche baggery, however is a personality disorder, not a measure of one’s intellectual capacity. A hallmark characteristic trait of douche baggery is the strong inclination by a person to apply whatever talents they have toward pursuit and defense of unwise, misantrhopic ends. See, e.g. Supreme Court Justice Anton Scalia for one of the most perfect example imaginable of great intellectual capacity totally uncoupled with any human wisdom. Bill Kristol is another.
Rome Again
Actually, jbarntt, if you knew anything of which you speak, you’d find that John Cole is very “bi-partisan”. He used to love Republicans, but now he is into Democrats. ;)
euZoia
manahmanah Says:
KRK-
OBAMA/BIDEN = BABE DOMAIN
Its the secret plan to secure women voters.
***
Looks like the plan is active! There’s actually a Babe Domain for Obama Biden website at Babe-Domain.com. Women submit pics (SFW) with campaign stickers etc, and write why they support the ticket. You can vote them up and buy stuff with their photos on it. Pretty cool idea. I want to see all the beautiful Obama supporters sending photos.