Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’m sure you banged some questionable people yourself. We’re allowed to grow past that.

I didn’t have alien invasion on my 2023 BINGO card.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

Every reporter and pundit should have to declare if they ever vacationed with a billionaire.

People are weird.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

This blog will pay for itself.

When someone says they “love freedom”, rest assured they don’t mean yours.

A consequence of cucumbers

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

Why is it so hard for them to condemn hate?

This must be what justice looks like, not vengeful, just peaceful exuberance.

Accused of treason; bitches about the ratings. I am in awe.

There is no compromise when it comes to body autonomy. You either have it or you don’t.

The problem people have with Biden’s age is the color of the VPs skin.

Jack Smith: “Why did you start campaigning in the middle of my investigation?!”

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

Let there be snark.

“Let’s not pretend [Trump] wants to engage in high-minded discourse.”

Let me file that under fuck it.

They are lying in pursuit of an agenda.

The arc of the moral universe doesn’t bend itself. it’s up to us.

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Reader Interactions

115Comments

  4. 4.

    zmulls

    I’d Google “recipe mango chutney” and find one that was fairly easy to do but didn’t contain any prefab packaged ingredients.

    I would probably google “recipe mango chutney red onion” or whatever other essential ingredient I wanted.

    (I say chutney rather than relish cause I think that’s what you really want).

    And I did not Bing it. Nor will I.

  6. 6.

    schrodinger's cat

    I’d like to make a mango relish for it.

    How ripe is the mango? Fresh or frozen, my suggestions depend on your answer.

  9. 9.

    General Winfield Stuck

    All my Mangoes belong to Purl the Parakeet. And if I don’t deliver, all hell breaks loose.

    Olive oil, onion and garlic powder. Be the man you always wanted to be.

  10. 10.

    dave

    Mango, chopped cranberries, a bit of lemon juice and maybe some chopped fresh jalepeno. A good dry rub on the loin let it sit for an hour or two then grill over indirect heat, about 30 minutes per pound to 165 degrees.

  12. 12.

    Germane Jackson

    –“Do you have any suggestions?”

    –“I suggest you order something.”

  13. 13.

    Buzz Kelly

    I’m a Florida native, and mango salsa is a natural down here. Friends of mine love this.

    1 or two ripe mangos, peeled and diced.
    One sm. can of fruit cocktail w/juice
    One or two jalapeno peppers, seeded and diced fine
    Juice of one lime
    Fist of finely chopped cilantro.
    Salt and pepper to taste
    Let sit in refrigerator a few hours, or overnight, then serve.

    Depending on how much heat you like or don’t, increase jalapenos or increase mango/fruit cocktail. Enjoy!

  15. 15.

    Bertie Wooster

    I’d do chopped mango, red onion, jalapeno and cilantro. Toss with lemon juice, salt and pepper, and a dash of olive oil.

  20. 20.

    LM

    Weird story:
    A friend of mine, after many a mango over many a year, broke out in a horrendous head-to-toe rash. Her dermatologist told her to wear latex gloves when peeling mangoes because mango skins contain a toxin similar to poison ivy’s. As with poison oak or ivy, a person might come in contact many times without incident, but then one unlucky day, might end up writing a huge check to a dermatologist for the pleasure of that nice mango salsa or sorbet.
    So if you’ve got some gloves on hand (so to speak), you might make that step one.

  21. 21.

    MCA

    No chutney recipe here, but my wife and I are big fans of a really simple pork tenderloin that utilizes mango chutney. Is that good enough?

    Mix approximately equal parts curry powder and Dijon mustard. Spread over the tenderloin. You can let it sit for a while, but it’s obviously not a marinade, so you can toss it straight on the grill. Might want to leave some curry/mustard in reserve to reapply as you flip the meat, too. After grilling, carve into medallions, plate, and spread a mild mango chutney on top. Cuts the heat beautifully. Serve with a spinach salad with mandarin oranges, toasted almonds and poppyseed dressing, and some couscous on the side.

  23. 23.

    General Winfield Stuck

    OT (or food for thought)

    After hearing various wingnuts obsessing over Sotomayor’s “wise Latina” remark, Lindsay Graham is currently taking his pound of flesh and prattling on about how unfair it is that he couldn’t say something similar (anymore), lest he get crucified. It just strikes me as a crackers lament that they can no longer voice their racist epithets in public and must now huddle in bathroom stalls and whisper them as sweet nothings into one another’s ear, or something along those lines.

  24. 24.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    After hearing various wingnuts obsessing over Sotomayor’s “wise Latina” remark, Lindsay Graham is currently taking his pound of flesh and prattling on about how unfair it is that he couldn’t say something similar (anymore), lest he get crucified.

    Lindsay Graham is a smart crossdresser.

  25. 25.

    Keith G

    Take the loin, put in freezer til really hard, travel to DC, and beat Lindsay Graham to a bloody pulp. I’ll buy you a new roast.

    (I’m listening to his questioning of Sotomayor. He is a f*ck.)

    I need to take a walk and find some puppies and little kittens to snuggle.

  26. 26.

    JK

    OT

    In addition to throwing out the first pitch at tonight’s baseball all-star game, Obama will reportedly spend an inning or two in the broadcast booth during the game.

    Michael Steele: I’ll Woo Blacks To GOP With “Fried Chicken And Potato Salad”
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bil-browning/steele-gop-woos-blacks-wi_b_231534.html

    Alberto Gonzales: Sotomayor Should Explain Herself To GOP
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/14/alberto-gonzales-sotomayo_n_231241.html

    http://www.politicalpartytime.org track parties for members of Congress or congressional candidates that happen all year round in Washington, D.C. and beyond.

  27. 27.

    JenJen

    Shorter Lindsey Graham: “Hey, would you mind trying on this Burqa? Just want to see if it fits, Judge Sotomayor. And by the way, how fast can you type ‘Burqa?’ Oh, and 9/11.”

    Is there a more sexist tool in the Senate than this jackass? And does he really serve any purpose other than being John McCain’s wingman? I mean, really.

  29. 29.

    Screamin' Demon

    Think Fast

    I’m familiar with most of Pink Floyd’s oeuvre, but I can’t recall a song with “think fast” in the lyrics. From the Atom Heart Mother LP, maybe? I’ve only heard it once, ’cause it sucks. Even the band hated it.

  31. 31.

    Dreggas

    everyone else beat me to it. Mango chutney is the way to go. Gives a little kick along with the sweetness.

  32. 32.

    The Cat Who Would Be Tunch

    Need mango relish? Bah. I humbly submit that “real” mangoes only come from the subcontinent.

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    Lindsay Graham is currently taking his pound of flesh and prattling on about how unfair it is that he couldn’t say something similar (anymore), lest he get crucified.

    What killed me was his intro into that topic: “I hope one day there will be more women serving in elected office in the Middle East”.

    Why don’t you focus on your own country first, Senator, and set an example for the rest of the world?

  34. 34.

    JK

    @JenJen:

    Is there a more sexist tool in the Senate than this jackass?

    John McCain. He cynically thought Hillary’s female supporters would vote for him if he picked Palin as his running mate. I can’t think of too many things more sexist than that.

  35. 35.

    Quicksand

    Um, canned fruit cocktail? Nuh uh.

    Mango salsa. Easy, needs no cooking:

    Diced mango. Diced red onion. Diced peppers (I’d mix some red bell peppers and green jalapenos). A fresh herb (cilantro, mint, parsley, or basil perhaps). Maybe a little olive oil to give it some gloss. Salt and pepper to taste.

  36. 36.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    @JenJen:

    Is there a more sexist tool in the Senate than this jackass? And does he really serve any purpose other than being John McCain’s wingman? I mean, really.

    Did you mean pivotman?

  38. 38.

    Quicksand

    @Demon:

    I’m familiar with most of Pink Floyd’s oeuvre, but I can’t recall a song with “think fast” in the lyrics.

    It’s from the Surgeon General Pick album, remember?

  39. 39.

    The Moar You Know

    Bah. Putting mango and other such “fruity” delicacies on Real American Meat™ are for those of the effete liberal persuasion. The following condiments are acceptable:

    Salt
    Pepper
    BBQ sauce
    Sand
    Grilled onions
    Pieces of chrome from your bumper
    Char from your uber-manly barbeque pit (needs to be 9′ x 9′ to qualify)

  40. 40.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @The Cat Who Would Be Tunch:

    “I hope one day there will be more women serving in elected office in the Middle East”.

    Shorter Graham — everybody knows we goopers are total fuckups Sonia, but we’ll always have La Surge.

  41. 41.

    LarryB

    Prepare a couple hours before eating for best flavor

    1 mango
    1/3 large cucumber, peeled and seeded
    1 tomato
    1 or 2 serrano peppers, minced fine
    (optional) cilantro or mint

    Chop and toss

    If it’s bland, add a pinch of salt
    If it’s bitter, add a dollop of honey or mirin (a sweet Japanese cooking wine)

    Delicious!

  42. 42.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Thank you Moar. I would add smoker’s cough sputum to your fine list.

  43. 43.

    JenJen

    @General Winfield Stuck:

    It just strikes me as a crackers lament that they can no longer voice their racist epithets in public and must now huddle in bathroom stalls and whisper them as sweet nothings into one another’s ear, or something along those lines.

    Who needs a bathroom stall? David Brooks’ inner thigh meets the same end.

  44. 44.

    SFAW

    And does he really serve any purpose other than being John McCain’s wingman? I mean, really.

    Does this mean we’ll have to listen to him campaign for Preznit on the platform “He’s best buddies with a guy who spent seven years as a POW during Vietnam, so you MAY NOT QUESTION his love of country (nor anything else)!”

    Or something. Also.

  45. 45.

    Leelee for Obama

    @Keith G:

    For the win!

    I keep hoping one of these assholes will suddenly stop short, remain quiet a few moments and then say “Sorry, I just ran out of crap!”

    (Hat tip to Stephen Colbert on his report of Christos’ installation at City Hall a few years back. I laughed till I pee’d!)

  46. 46.

    Joy

    Mango, cilantro, lime or lemon juice, green onions, diced red pepper and jalapeno pepper. Muy deliciosa y linda!

  48. 48.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    I would add smoker’s cough sputum to your fine list.

    If none available, Black Gunpowder sprinklings will do. You can use smokeless but keep it quiet. Explosive tastiness.

  51. 51.

    Billy K

    You guys are all getting ahead of yourselves. Calm down. Don’t be incited by the words, “Think fast.”

    Now…. John…. do you have a Mango? Because you’re gonna need one.

  55. 55.

    Face

    @The Moar You Know: Have to agree with this. What you’re making sounds more like a WOmango relish. Why not add some candles and chardanay, some mood lighting, and fancy matching silverware?

    You’d have to beat down (off?) Andrew Sullivan to keep him out of your house. Or something.

  56. 56.

    Keith

    I suggest building a time machine to return to 2003 where mango relish/chutney belongs.

  57. 57.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    Who else has teeth marks on their flat screen now thanks to ninerdave?

  58. 58.

    Laura W

    @Face:

    chardanay

    It’s “Chardonnay”, but I am sure you are proud that you don’t know how to spell it.
    Chardonnay sucks. Chambourcin and Viognier are the sizzzzzling sexy hot grapes for Summer of 2009.

    Edit: Hating on Norah Jones?
    I’m going over to the Oprah message boards. There is too much testosterone in this place tonight.

  59. 59.

    Billy K

    @Keith:

    I suggest building a time machine to return to 2003 where mango relish/chutney belongs.

    Not enough time. Can he just put on a Norah Jones record and talk about how awesome it’s gonna be to invade Iraq?

  60. 60.

    Richard Hausman

    Simple:

    Chutney
    1 mango cut into 1/2-inch dice
    3 tablespoons lemon juice from 1 small lemon
    1 tablespoon chopped fresh cilantro leaves

    Mix together then set aside until the roast is done, then serve the chutney alongside the pork slices.

  63. 63.

    Some Guy

    I love these kinds of posts. They are sort “be my life coach.” It always becomes a kind of open thread but loop around back to the query. Kind of general chat with a mango anchor.

    I really enjoy that you ask for help, John.

  64. 64.

    tisalaska

    Easy…dice mango, add fresh chopped cilantro, red onion, jalapeno pepper, lime juice all to your taste..a little avocado will be great too..yummmm

  66. 66.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @Colette:

    the people who moved and gave him to me named him that, because they thought he was a girl. He wasn’t, with purplish nasal coloring. Plus he’s colored white and light blue which is sort of p(ea)urlish, I guess.

  67. 67.

    aimai

    I chop up my mango and add chopped red onion, lime juice, cilantro, chopped jalapeno, thai basil, crushed toasted cumin if I’m swinging that way. If I had an avocado I’d throw that in as well.

    Another way to do it is to quickly sautee spices like onion seed, coriander, cumin and salt and red pepper in a little oil and then add the mango and some onion and even raisins for a more cooked version.

    Its all good.

    aimai

  68. 68.

    Jay B.

    the citrus, cilantro, red onion, jalapeno salsa recipe is a can’t miss — but if you want to try something a little different, I’d try to warm a little garlic in olive oil — but on very low — then add some balsamic, then cut up some mango and let that warm up a bit (again just warm, not cook).

    Then throw it on your cooked pork (salt and pepper).

    That or go all out and do allspice, mango, thyme, habanaros/scotch bonnets, ginger, pepper and salt and jerk that bastard.

  69. 69.

    Laura W

    I’m bummed I did not make an effort to see Maher in Greenville, SC.
    It’s not so very far from me.
    This is turning into a very funny interview, actually.

  70. 70.

    Jay B.

    @aimai:

    It really is weird how often over the years we often we post something similar within minutes of each other — i didn’t even see yours before posting, but I was thinking raisins. Hope all’s well.

  72. 72.

    RedKitten

    It’s “Chardonnay”, but I am sure you are proud that you don’t know how to spell it. Chardonnay sucks. Chambourcin and Viognier are the sizzzzzling sexy hot grapes for Summer of 2009.

    Chardonnay — blech. Way too sweet.

    OT: I had my 36-week ultrasound yesterday, and it turns out that I’ve done such a kickass job controlling my gestational diabetes that the baby is of a perfectly normal weight and size (Spawn of Krista currently weighs just a smidge over 6 lbs.), and there should be no need for a c-section. After all the hard work, frustration, tears, food measuring, and desperate longing for ice cream, it’s damn gratifying to know that this is paying off.

  73. 73.

    HumboldtBlue

    Just skip the cilantro chopping and grab your bottle of dish soap and add a few dollops of that. You’ll get the same flavor and taste as you do from a “Fist full of Cilantro”

  74. 74.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @RedKitten:

    it’s damn gratifying to know that this is paying off.

    Great news!. Not much longer:)

    edit- then do it all over again with Krista Spawn 2

  77. 77.

    demkat620

    Uh-oh look out. Roger Simon is on Hardball defending Sarah Palin. Again.

    And then he’ll have to take on CNN. They have a poll that says Sarah ain’t all that and a bag of chips.

    Maybe Roger could call Pat Buchanan and they could cry on each others shoulders.

  79. 79.

    blondie

    Cooks Illustrated just sent me their 2009 Cooking for Two book- it has a spice rubbed pork tenderloin and mango relish recipe that looks so easy-

    chili powder- 2tsp, cocoa powder 1/2 tsp, salt (coat, brown in ovensafe skillet and cook @ 425 for 12-15 min, tent for 10-15 more)

    1/2 mango, 2 tbsp fresh cilantro, 1 tbsp lime juice 1 small shallot 1 tsp minced jalapeno, salt to taste.

    Not to sales-pitch, but I want almost everything in this book.

  82. 82.

    cdmarine

    Oh, God yes! This mango salsa is to die for, and is absolutely the prettiest damn salsa you’ve ever seen (the pictures really do not do it justice, trust me):

    http://www.yumsugar.com/2693533

    (This is not my site, BTW. But I have made this salsa, and it is dee-lish.)

  84. 84.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    : I eat bacon with every meal. Last night I made a pastrami sub with provolone and bacon.

    Well, at least you won’t be late for yer heart attack.

  86. 86.

    mai naem

    I prefer to use hard mangoes which are more tart and not as sweet. Dice a mango, add one to two tsp cayenne pepper, a teaspoon of salt and a teaspoon of lemon juice. Let sit for a couple of hours.

  87. 87.

    JenJen

    Oh Christ. Karl Rove (the real one) is now following me on Twitter.

    I’m pretty sure The Imperial March was playing as I discovered this disturbing piece of information.

    @JK: Ya think? I don’t know. He didn’t even really smirk.

  88. 88.

    cdmarine

    Oh wow! There’s another “Colette” here. How did I not notice that? Nice to meet you.

  89. 89.

    Bob

    This isn’t off-topic if your local feline overlord is named “Mango”.

    Humans are easily controlled:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/8147566.stm

    Cats ‘exploit’ humans by purring

    Cat owners may have suspected as much, but it seems our feline friends have found a way to manipulate us humans.

    Researchers at the University of Sussex have discovered that cats use a “soliciting purr” to overpower their owners and garner attention and food.

    – – BBC Science News, Monday, 13 July 2009

  90. 90.

    Kineslaw

    I like mint, red onion, jalapeno or serrano peppers, lime juice, mango, salt and pepper for my mango salsa.

    If you need to clear your sinuses make a gastrique. Red wine vinegar and blackberry (or other) preserves. Reduce on medium by at least 2/3. I always add it to my pork and mango menu.

  91. 91.

    JK

    @JenJen:

    Karl Rove (the real one) is now following me on Twitter

    Good luck with that one.

    I got the impression that Maher decided not to go for a cheap laugh with that line by Matthews.

  93. 93.

    General Winfield Stuck

    I just heard Vinnie Cannistrano tell us that the Cheney’s Death Squad program never was activated because we used to it to kill the wrong person in Kenya. Duh!

  94. 94.

    SGEW

    Cat owners may have suspected definitively known as much, but it seems our feline friends have found a way to manipulate us humans.

    fixt

  96. 96.

    Nylund

    John, did you use to make things like mango relish back when you were a wingnut? Or did you only start doing that once we pulled you over from the dark side?

  97. 97.

    JenJen

    @Nylund:

    John, did you use to make things like mango relish back when you were a wingnut? Or did you only start doing that once we pulled you over from the dark side?

    To be fair, there’s no arugula in chutney. ;-)

  98. 98.

    Laura W

    @JenJen: Wow. I’m confused. I might’ve been in the kitchen overseeing my chicky breasts on the Foreman Grill. Do you mean when Maher was asked about a woman or marriage or whatever trite, banal shit Tweety was spewing?

    Do you have a sad that Maher did not mention you, JenJen?

  100. 100.

    JenJen

    @Laura W: You know, I’m sure the video will emerge, but Tweety said something about “having people to bang” in the South, and in that Tweety-way, he didn’t mean anything sexual; I think he meant “bang” as in “hit” or fuck-if-I-know. Translating Tweety is a fool’s errand.

    I think upon reflection that maybe JK was right… Maher decided it was a Family Show and decided not to hit the pitch. :-)

  101. 101.

    R-Jud

    @RedKitten:

    (Spawn of Krista currently weighs just a smidge over 6 lbs.), and there should be no need for a c-section.

    Nice work. Four (or five or six or seven, if yours is like mine) weeks to go!

    Mango: it is so nice frozen and blended into a smoothie with lime juice. Especially if you then add vodka or tequila to said smoothie. I would go make one now, but I’m drinking a bottle of Bully Hill Love My Goat that my sister packed in my suitcase for me. I love that kid. My sister, I mean. Not the goat.

  105. 105.

    demkat620

    @Laura W: Even better Lawrence O’D to replace Joe and Mika in the morning.

    I caught 20 minutes of that crap this morning and wanted to throw up. Why was Mr. Campbell Brown and Liz Chee-knee and Mark Halperin on my tv this morning.

  106. 106.

    JenJen

    @demkat620: Yeah, WTF was up with Halperin, Mika, Dan Senor and Liz Cheney all ganging up on Eugene Robinson this morning? It was nauseating.

    Halperin is only out-douched by Lindsey Graham today, for my money.

  107. 107.

    Laura W

    @JenJen: Oh, I’ve been working behind the scenes, supporting you in silence. You know…all Barbara Hershey “Beaches”-like, in your shadow, you’re my hero, blah blah.

    Did you not see me state that you and I were Co-Presidents of the “Juicers 4 Mika Fan Club” in an earlier thread?
    I think our schedules are just out of sync right now. Don’t worry. We’ll prolly both get our periods on the same day soon and we’ll be right back in the flow of things together.

  108. 108.

    General Winfield Stuck

    @JK:

    I reckon now someone should ask Simpson what is it religious wingnuts don’t get about Blue America, say like in North Carolina and Indiana.

  110. 110.

    Laura W

    @demkat620: Fuckhead LOVES it when I talk about my period in public.
    He’s a freak.
    (Thread needed some yin energy anyway. Way too much yang starting to ooze around.)

  112. 112.

    JenJen

    @Laura W: Totally missed that! We’ve definitely been off lately… glad to see you’re still feeling the Mika-lurve!

    I’m sure the ovums will take care of themselves shortly, obvs. ;-)

  113. 113.

    Docrailgun

    Don’t do it!

    Mango chutney is something Bobby Flay would put on his pork loin.

    You don’t want to be like Bobby Flay, man.

  114. 114.

    Anne Laurie

    I had my 36-week ultrasound yesterday, and it turns out that I’ve done such a kickass job controlling my gestational diabetes that the baby is of a perfectly normal weight and size (Spawn of Krista currently weighs just a smidge over 6 lbs.), and there should be no need for a c-section. After all the hard work, frustration, tears, food measuring, and desperate longing for ice cream, it’s damn gratifying to know that this is paying off.

    Congratulations, Krista! and/or RedKitten!

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