Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Democrats are back in array!

Something needs to be done about our bogus SCOTUS.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

He wakes up lying, and he lies all day.

Michigan is a great lesson for Dems everywhere: when you have power…use it!

When do the post office & the dmv weigh in on the wuhan virus?

Thanks to your bullshit, we are now under siege.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

The jury literally has a bell they can ring to force Trump to show up on command. Greatest thing ever!

If you tweet it in all caps, that makes it true!

Someone should tell Republicans that violence is the last refuge of the incompetent, or possibly the first.

I see no possible difficulties whatsoever with this fool-proof plan.

Hey Washington Post, “Democracy Dies in Darkness” is supposed to be a warning, not a mission statement.

In after Baud. Damn.

It’s a new day. Light all those Biden polls of young people on fire and throw away the ashes.

Anyone who bans teaching American history has no right to shape America’s future.

Biden: Oh no. We’ve upset Big Pharma again.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

Is it negotiation when the other party actually wants to shoot the hostage?

Russian mouthpiece, go fuck yourself.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

I’m pretty sure there’s only one Jack Smith.

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

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88Comments

  6. 6.

    Baud

    How long before the heart rejects him?

    You guys are so negative. I predict a Mr. Grinch-type ending to this story.

  9. 9.

    Nutella

    I’m not the first or even the 100th to say: What a waste of a heart that might have saved the life of a decent person.

    And I’m not the first or even the 100th to say: I’d much rather have my insurance payments contribute to the birth control pills of grad students than to this very expensive operation for someone who has had 5 heart attacks.

  10. 10.

    Corner Stone

    Why was the coder wasting time reading previous comments instead of doing her damn job?!

    And yes, I’ve already schmeared bear grease all over my body for when she arrives to physically assault me.

  12. 12.

    piratedan

    I like the changes thus far, the site looks “cleaner”, I like the lexicon being stashed in a more prominent place, I like the search empowerment by tags, authors etc. When my ship runs aground, I’ll throw some coin your way, seriously… I like the look and feel of the place JC.

  14. 14.

    inventor

    Wait a minute: Government health care paid for Cheney to get a heart transplant? Where the hell were the Death Panels?!?!

  18. 18.

    MikeJ

    @the ghost of cleek: Oddly, on the main page you do get author, even if it is on the bottom. Nothing on the comment page.

    I think author moved down in fixing my gripe about comment count.

  20. 20.

    Warren Terra

    Best Cheney comment I’ve seen was that this must be referred to as a heart implant operation, not a heart transplant operation.

    Best political comment I’ve seen tonight is about Willard, though, from The Stranger‘s Paul Constant:

    6:21 PM: Matt Romney posted to Twitter (my favorite part is bolded):

    my dad’s finally getting a little R&R this wkend. pic here at the movies today w me n my kids.

    Oh, man. Now I really want to know what Mitt Romney saw at the movies today. He’s with very little kids, so it probably wasn’t the Hunger Games… Oh, God. It was The Lorax, wasn’t it? Mitt Romney probably just watched the plasticky, Hollywood blockbusterization of the classic environmental kids’ book The Lorax. I bet you he fucking loved it. UPDATE: Nope, it was The Hunger Games. Which is even worse, really. Mitt Romney spent a good portion of today being entertained by a movie about the very poor murdering each other for the entertainment of the ridiculously wealthy. He probably didn’t even realize it was supposed to be a dystopian future.

  21. 21.

    Corner Stone

    @David Koch:

    Kooky Kucinich says he’s fine if Joe the Plummer wins his seat.

    Joe the Plumber is never mentioned. Either in your link or the embedded link the blurb comes from.

  27. 27.

    cckids

    @dp:

    I refuse to believe there weren’t more deserving potential recipients

    A-f*cking-men. Imagine if your loved one just passed and you find out that the Cheney got their heart. I think it would break mine.

  30. 30.

    Warren Terra

    @MikeJ:
    TPM does, of course. With 83% reporting, Rick got 50%, Willard is just over the critical 25% threshold, and Newt got shellacked at 16%.

  32. 32.

    eemom

    I’ve been researching survival rates/durations for heart transplantees.

    The older and sicker, the shorter. As you would expect.

    I do most unabashedly look forward to that motherfucker’s death.

  35. 35.

    David Koch

    Guys, Cheney didn’t get his heart from a “donor”.

    No, he shot some hunter in the face and stole his organs.

  41. 41.

    Concerned Citizen

    I don’t root for many people to drop dead. He’s on the top of the list. What a waste of a heart.

  45. 45.

    BonnyAnne

    @Narcissus:

    IIRC it varies by region (the entire country is broken up in transplant regions, each of which has different requirements, which is why Steve Jobs got is liver txp in Kentucky–they didn’t care if he had cancer, which will just about 100% rule you out on the west coast). Also, you only have to be listed before you hit the age limit; they don’t rule people out if they happen to live too long, as long as they were already on the list. So if he’s 71 now and waited 20 months he would have been listed at 69 or so.

    BUT BUT BUT some people get an LVAD (left ventricular assist device, like he had) as a stopgap, and some get one as a “destination” (i.e. “go home to die with it”). Clearly his was a bridge to transplant.

    He appears to have legitimately qualified for one. If you match all the requirements and are considered competent to manage the txp, you go on the list. Even if you are a war criminal.

  46. 46.

    WyldPirate

    I blame Obama for the fucked up shit on the site rebuild and for not stopping Cheney’s heart transplant.

  49. 49.

    Southern Beale

    The latest in wingnut fear porn is that FEMA has ordered 420 million survival meals, a 7000% increase, and WHAT DO THEY KNOW THAT YOU DON’T!ELEVEN!

    I somehow got on the e-mail list of gun nut/anti-tax activist Alan Gottlieb and this information was in his latest dispatch.

    I simply do not understand people who believe nutballs whose only purpose is to scare the crap out of people so they can sell them shit.

  50. 50.

    danielx

    Heart implant is about right. The OR protocols for replacing a lump of plutonium must be absolute hell. You didn’t really think he had a heart in there, did you?

  51. 51.

    chrome agnomen

    @eemom:

    when asked about this, i always reply that i want cheney to live 150 years–in exquisite pain every hour.

  52. 52.

    Martin

    Holy shit. Spent all day working outside only to find this site no longer looks like crap. Looking good so far.

  53. 53.

    WyldPirate

    @Baud:
    No….chumming for bait.

    Now shut the fuck up; you’re scaring the other fish with your dipshittery.

  54. 54.

    beabea

    Nice to come here after reading the barf-inducing comments on the Cheney heart implant story at HuffPo, which appear to have been posted by extremely earnest people trying extremely hard to prove that even though they are liberals, they really are nice people who can overlook a little war criminality and profiteering, and wish poor Mr. Cheney well. Because people are more important than politics, after all.

    And no, I don’t know what possessed me to read HuffPo comments.

  55. 55.

    Martin

    I have no doubt that Cheney went for a supply-side solution to his heart problem: repeatedly have people killed until a donor match came up.

  56. 56.

    Nicole

    I’m thrilled he got the transplant. According to the article, most recipients live at least five years after, which should be enough time for him to see Obama win this fall, and the Dems retain the White House in 2016.

    And then he will die from an asploded head.

  57. 57.

    mai naem

    The rules must have been changed cuz the age limit used to be 65 but its always different rules for Republicans. And I wish wish wish somebody would ask either Liz Cheney about the big bad gubmint paying for her daddy’s healthcare bills and why that is okay. But, nobody will ask her that.

  58. 58.

    Older

    I really really dislike the new look. Hurts my eyes, in some indefinable way. I can deal with font size, because I can adjust it, but the site still looks too stark, and kind of … high contrast. Or something. I dunno …

  59. 59.

    Bago

    If you can whine about taxpayer money paying for abortions, can someone complain about the taxpayer paying for a heart implant into a 71 year old man?

  60. 60.

    John M. Burt

    I’m not wishing for Cheney to die soon. As long as an unindicted scumbag is still alive (another example: Henry Kissinger), there is still the remote chance that he’ll face juistice some day.

    A forced landing in a country with the guts to prosecute is the most likely way that could happen, but my heart of hearts pictures a raid by a commando team in pale blue helmets . . . .

  61. 61.

    Jennifer

    The heart implant reminds me of a joke my dad pulled on me back around 1992.

    Dad says, did you hear about Pat Buchanan’s heart surgery?

    I hadn’t. Dad says, “yeah, they installed one.”

  62. 62.

    Punchy

    The whole blog looks diff. Whaddup wit dat? Did johnny walker take over Johnny Cole and barf out this new format? Oy….

  63. 63.

    Omnes Omnibus

    I rather like the new look. There are things like numbering comments that should be addressed, but overall it looks good.

  64. 64.

    Mnemosyne

    G said this is making him have second thoughts about being an organ donor (half-jokingly, but kidding on the square).

  65. 65.

    Mark S.

    Does SNL only have a new episode once a month now?

    It was weird watching jokes about Herman Cain being a frontrunner. It seems like a couple years ago Cain was still in the race.

  68. 68.

    Anne Laurie

    @Narcissus:

    Cheney is in his seventies. What’s the old-age cutoff for organ transplantation?

    According to Wikipedia, anyone over 60 is too old, as is anyone with a history of vascular leg problems (which IIRC Cheney’s had as well). Of course, in our imperfect world, it would be more surprising if Cheney weren’t to be given as many replacement hearts as he wanted to go through the not inconsiderable ordeal of transplant surgery to obtain…

  69. 69.

    Anne Laurie

    @Older:

    I can deal with font size, because I can adjust it, but the site still looks too stark, and kind of … high contrast.

    The new font is spindly. I’m guessing it looks better on hand-held devices, but it needs to be bolder to be readable on desktop monitors.

  70. 70.

    Death Panel Truck

    What a waste of a perfectly good heart. That’d be like giving Mickey Mantle a new fucking liver (oh wait, they did that. Son of a bitch died three months later.)

    I wouldn’t have given the evil bastard a baboon heart. Wait – those don’t work too well in humans, do they? On second thought…

  71. 71.

    Nutella

    Someone known to the Twitter as Brewkkake says:

    Dick Cheney’s doctors made medical history today when they managed to fit a human heart inside an asshole.

  72. 72.

    Triassic Sands

    As all good Amurkins can agree, it would be horrible if all Americans had insurance that would pay for a heart transplant at age 71. Why that would be just plain wrong.

    No, the country and its people are much better off restricting the availability of heart transplants to privileged war criminals.

    This is one of those threads where I’m supposed to pretend that Cheney is a human being worthy of respect and dignity. Sorry, that’s just too big a lie. This was one huge waste of a transplantable heart.

  75. 75.

    Triassic Sands

    @Death Panel Truck:

    I agree that neither Cheney nor Mantle should have received a transplanted organ.

    But Mantle was an alcoholic, not a war criminal — there is a difference. I wouldn’t lump them together in the same argument without specific recognition of their differences.

    1. Mantle hit what were probably the longest home runs ever.
    1a. Cheney started what were probably the most unnecessary wars ever.

    2. Mantle was very entertaining to watch at bat.
    2a. Cheney had people beaten to death with bats (for his own entertainment).

    3. Mantle wanted a new liver so he could go out and buy himself and his friends another round.
    3a. Cheney wanted a new heart because he’s still trying to figure out how to buy himself a place in heaven (on the governing committee).

    4. Mantle didn’t deserve a transplanted liver because he chose to destroy his own liver by drinking recklessly.
    4a. Cheney’s heart disease is likely a genetic failing and, thus, no fault of his own. Being a murderous thug was a choice.

    Etc.

    @Bago:

    If you can whine about taxpayer money paying for abortions, can someone complain about the taxpayer paying for a heart implant into a 71 year old man monster?

    Fine, as long as we’re in the business of denying health care to tens of millions of people, I am happy to complain about and object to giving a 71-year-old war criminal a heart transplant.

  76. 76.

    Elizabelle

    Appalling waste of a human heart that could have saved and served someone better.

    Maybe this is the opening act in Mr. Cheney eventually getting deserved retribution. Stay tuned.

  77. 77.

    joel hanes

    @eemom: Yes. Old and iniquitous as I am, yet may I hope to survive long enough to salute Cheney as Byron urged men to salute Castlereagh — also to sign the visitors’ registry at the Bush 43 presidential library.

  78. 78.

    GG

    @Mnemosyne: That was my first thought on hearing, or close. I have an organ donor card, but the idea of something like Cheney getting so much as my gall bladder, never mind something important, makes me really rethink the whole idea.

  82. 82.

    passerby

    I will adapt to changes.

    Though, I prefer the author’s name to appear under the post’s title.

    I will miss the numerical notations next to each comment.

    I will adapt to changes…I will adapt…will adapt…

  83. 83.

    passerby

    Also, I made edits and it indicated “changes saved” but I wasn’t take back to the thread.

    Also too, I will miss the numerical notation next to each comment. Numbered comments made it easier to navigate the thread.

    I will adapt.

  84. 84.

    bob h

    The anti-rejection drugs will make Cheney more susceptible to diseases like lymphoma and skin cancer. I know we are supposed to wish him well, but I cannot bring myself to do so.

    (Like the new look of the site)

  85. 85.

    Rand Careaga

    I have this mental image of the new heart writhing and struggling beneath the surgeon’s gloved hands, whimpering “Oh, God, no…please, no…I’ll be good…swear to God, I’ll be good…”

  86. 86.

    eemom

    @joel hanes:

    Old and iniquitous as I am, yet may I hope to survive long enough to salute Cheney as Byron urged men to salute Castlereagh

    I used teh Google, and the results of your splendiforous allusion are most worthy of sharing:

    Posterity will ne’er survey
    A nobler grave than this:
    Here lie the bones of Cheney:
    Stop, traveller, and piss.

    Well done, sir.

  87. 87.

    Rand Careaga

    In a special ceremony next week, the Vice-President’s former heart, encased in a one-meter diameter lead cylinder, will be lowered into a special concrete-lined shaft sunk 10,000 feet deep in geologically stable formations beneath Yucca Flats, Nevada.

  88. 88.

    TOP123

    @eemom: Late to this thread as usual, but I needed to add:

    The Castlereagh reference is doubly good: here’s Shelley on the same:

    I met Murder on the way –
    He had a mask like Castlereagh –
    Very smooth he looked, yet grim;
    Seven blood-hounds followed him;

    All were fat; and well they might
    Be in admirable plight,
    For one by one, and two by two,
    He tossed them human hearts to chew
    Which from his wide cloak he drew.

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