ALL YOUR CHAIRS ARE BELONG TO US:
Steve’s new thing is whenever I get up to rush and claim the seat and then refuse to get up. When Lily does this, I just pretend to not notice her and slowly lower my fat ass into the chair and she scrambles to the sides and climbs onto my lap. Not so with Mr. Catitude. He doesn’t flinch. I can attempt to sit, I can yell, I can clap my hands, and he just looks at me until I give up and pick him up and put him on my lap.
I’m never going to own another cat that isn’t a Maine Coon mix.
JPL
The moral of the story is don’t get up.
Fair Economist
Have you tried using the side effects of eating lots of beans?
TaMara (BHF)
A fine looking cat.
jheartney
Why should he get up? You’ve already warmed it for him, and after all, what else are humans for?
hildebrand
We have a feral cat whose mission in life is to trip me as I walk out the front door. I have never seen a cat move so damned fast – she materializes out of no-where, gets between my legs, and demands to be pet (she actually isn’t classically conditioned for table scraps like so many of the ferals down here). After I pet her, then she purrs loudly and moves off, content. If I neglect to take the few seconds to scratch her head there is a great deal of complaining and intentional tripping on my way out to the car.
Sonora
I love how much you love your cats.
Jerzy Russian
It must be a dangerous job, being between the chair and your big behind.
PurpleGirl
As it is said: dogs have owners, cats have staff.
Keith P.
One of my cats does that with my bed (moves right below the pillow, middle of the bed). However, when I try to lie in the bed off to the side, he’ll get up and position himself on my shoulder, head pressed against my neck. It’s like he just wants me to know he owns the bed, but really, he wants to have the choicest spot he can find.
Ripley
Anyone still want to mock Steve for having the good common sense to flee to another chair?
lahke
I am eagerly awaiting your discovery, in March or so, of what happens to Maine Coon fur on its way to springtime shedding. Your furminator will have met its match in those mats, you betcha.
John O
Very fond of my remaining Siamese for the same kind of reason. He’s a demanding cat, and takes no shit from the dog, either. Chatty as hell, and a whore for the luvin’ of the highest order. Every morning he won’t let me on my ‘puter until I’ve given him the vigorous head rub, as I call it, wherein I treat his head like I was trying to form a ball from Silly Putty. He digs it.
I love him. Nicholai. Nikki for short.
Alison
I love cats.
Percysowner
Maine Coons are special. I love mine with all my heart, even when he lays on my head after I’ve fallen asleep at night. They own everything and love your lap like nobody’s business.
Steeplejack
Note to night-shifters: the blog might get a little weird overnight. It doesn’t handle the time change well, especially the “fall back” one. Comments can show up out of order. At least that’s how it has been in the past. Maybe it was all fixed in the last upgrade.
Omnes Omnibus
@Steeplejack:
This is something new?
indycat32
My Willow follows me around and fusses at me until I pick her up so she can survey her domain from an appropriate height.
Anoniminous
Good friend of mine had a Maine Coon. 35lbs and 58″ from nose to tip of tail. Name of Conan – for obvious reasons. Sweetest
littlebig old thing with tons of personality.p.a.
@Steeplejack: the weird might get a little blog…
PeakVT
I can attempt to sit, I can yell, I can clap my hands, and he just looks at me until I give up and pick him up and put him on my lap.
I think I see the problem here.
Litlebritdiftrnt
Went to Loris band days today to see the show that I was told to be surprised about. Turned out DH wrote an entire half time show about how we met and married. While I knew about my old uniform being involved (because only I knew where it was in the house) I had no idea that my husband had conspired with my mother to get my wedding dress shipped from the UK as well as a white ensign, a UK flag, and a Royal Marines flag. The young girl that played me in the show was so nervous meeting me, she kept asking me how she should wear her hair, how the jacket should be closed, how the hat was worn. I will try to figure out how to upload the video to youtube so you guys can see it. I just loved the narration “this is a true story”. Twenty three years later we are still going strong. Sometimes you have to just accept that “I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe” actually works.
Ted & Hellen
LOU REED PORTRAIT, in tribute and for sale.
JPL
@Litlebritdiftrnt: It sounds as though, those worries about the trip were for naught. Have a wonderful time.
Elizabelle
@Ted & Hellen:
That’s really good.
different-church-lady
So just go ahead and sit on him. This isn’t rocket surgery.
Steeplejack
@Omnes Omnibus:
Point taken.
Omnes Omnibus
@Steeplejack: It is interesting that you have been able to note in advance one of the forms the weirdness might take. Your marker is down.
Litlebritdiftrnt
@JPL: The worries about the trip are still real, I can guarantee you that something will come up while I am gone that will cause the boss to be absolutely furious, it could be the fact that he spoke to a client who he didn’t know, it could be an unpaid bill that he couldn’t understand, it could be that he checks the messages and there is a strange message from a client that he does not even know that he represents. This is my life. I hate it.
srv
Looks like he’s already putting on weight.
Keith G
@Ted & Hellen: Awesome. I admire your effort/talent.
vtr
We have a male coon cat – most gorgeous cat I have ever seen. Keep a course toothed comb nearby, and comb Steve whenever he is in your your lap. He will love forever.
Thor Heyerdahl
@Steeplejack: “When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.” – Hunter S. Thompson
mdblanche
@Steeplejack: Well this is just the last straw. Defund and repeal Balloon Juice!
BGinCHI
Cole, if you’re looking down this thread: Mrs. BG is reading Wiley’s novel right now and just LOVING it.
So please pass along the info that he has another satisfied customer.
Southern Beale
My Maine Coon does the same thing. It’s like a war. I get up to pee and come back and guess who’s in my chair. And he will NOT move.
beergoggles
This is why I have big dogs. When they take my spot on the couch, I just sit on them and begin the test of wills to see who is uncomfortable enough to get out first… and I’m way too lazy to lose.
Bill E Pilgrim
@Steeplejack: You know my fingers are crossed, but sometimes I wonder if John Kerry was really the best choice here. The Democratic Party sometimes reminds me of the title of that new TV show, “Lost”.
John Cole
@BGinCHI: The new one or the old one?
Suzanne
Steve looks just like my dearly departed Nico (the best cat ever). Enjoy.
catclub
@hildebrand: We had a cat like that in our neighborhood. Extremely meatloaf-like tabby. The first name we gave was Tripper. Unfortunately, a serious biter/attacker – as in going for the ankle and holding on with both front paws.
The attacks were unpredictable. The not-very-attentive owner did not take these stories seriously until the cat attacked him. Then things changed.
Corner Stone
@Bill E Pilgrim:
He seems a little patrician, nee “French” to me, if you will.
Whatever happens, I just hope we focus on the Midwestern states and hope the gheys don’t sink us. Again.
Bill E Pilgrim
@Corner Stone: You’re out of order! You’re all out of order! You get a car! It’s out of order too!
raven
@Corner Stone: How bout them DAWGS!
Corner Stone
@raven:Do you mean the unranked squad from UG?
I suppose they’re adequate.
JPL
@Corner Stone: You mean the ranking system that has Baylor at 5 and NIU at 21 …. haha
Corner Stone
@JPL: Now that you mention it…yes. Where might I find UG on any of these lists?
Felonius Monk
Obviously, Steve has found his new bitch.
JPL
@Corner Stone: Yup .. Florida or Georgia could easily beat several of those teams…imo..
raven
@JPL: Don’t bother with him.
raven
@JPL: Since they already beat LSU and the jive ass Cocks you are right.
Corner Stone
@raven: Choo mad, bro?
raven
@Corner Stone: Hell no.
JPL
It will be interesting to see how the rankings play out. The Big 12 has four ranked teams under Texas who isn’t ranked.
Corner Stone
@Bill E Pilgrim: Bill, I have to tell you. I’m a little scared here, so don’t leave me.
What happens if we somehow *don”t* win the presidential election *and* something even worse happens? Like, God forbid, the Red Sox win a World Series for the first time since 1918?
*Shutter*
Steeplejack
@Corner Stone:
It’s “shudder.”
Highway Rob
@JPL: My Longhorns are just setting me up for disappointment. The voters have it right. I am convinced of this.
Corner Stone
@Steeplejack: She shudder done what?
YellowJournalism
@Ted & Hellen: I actually enjoy seeing your work. This one is one of my favorites so far, and I’m not a big Lou Reed fan.
KS in MA
@PurpleGirl: “As it is said: dogs have owners, cats have staff.”
Suggested edit: Cats and terriers have staff.
BGinCHI
@John Cole: Old one. Sorry.
New one not out until late January for regular people. Will try to make sure we invite him here for our writer series.
AdamK
@srv: A little tunchitude around the midriff methinks.
AdamK
@KS in MA: Pomeranians have a race of slave creatures.
fuckwit
wtf do you feed your cats to make ’em bloat up like that
Svensker
Good kitty. Hugs to you, Cole.
Joy in FL
Finally– a photo of Steve.
I loved seeing Rosie on the pillow.
Where’s Lily?
WereBear
Yeah, got snagged in my early twenties, have one now.
They are incredible. I never want to be without one.
radish
Well I hope you’re flattered. After many years of service to various small furry masters, one thing I’ve observed is that cats take location very seriously (you have to for quality napping I suppose). Good Places To Sit are absolutely critical, and spot-thievery is a significant and meaningful social ritual.
So you may not be at the top of the social pyramid, but at least it’s being acknowledged that you’re a respectable member of the household, with the ability to identify a Good Place To Sit.
Talentless Hack
@lahke: We had to take our Maine Coon mix to the vet to have her mats cut out That’s the other part of cattitude – no, you may NOT do this yourself. Only the nice girls at the vet can do it, and you’re going to get an earful both going there and the return trip. Ours is a female, brown like Steve, but with splotches of copper (like a not-quite new penny, also tabby) on her back. I’d love to see an all-copper cat like that.
Her other fun thing to do is bring her kills in the house and eat them on the living room carpet. Crunch, crunch go the bones. Nothing left but some feathers and the feet.
Talentless Hack
@Bill E Pilgrim: They remind me of the Buffalo Bills. They can be ahead three touchdowns and still find a way to lose.
sm*t cl*de
A fine looking cat.
A fine looking figure of two cats.