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You are here: Home / Politics / Impeachment / Late Night Open Thread: Perv Lawyers for the Blood Perv God

Late Night Open Thread: Perv Lawyers for the Blood Perv God

by Anne Laurie|  February 1, 20212:42 am| 24 Comments

This post is in: Impeachment, Open Threads, Trumpery

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Quite the dynamic duo for Trump:

* the prosecutor who got shredded at the ballot and on the witness stand for his secret agreement to let Bill Cosby walk

and

* one of Jeffrey Epstein's friends https://t.co/biBjoz2zTq pic.twitter.com/j1zg0MnCUV

— Max Kennerly (@MaxKennerly) January 31, 2021

Look at it from Donny Dollhand’s point of view (assuming you can stoop that low): Schoen and Castor were the lawyers for BIG RICH CELEBRITY HORNDOGS, and by association that means that DJT is a BIG RICH CELEBRITY (also, a horndog, which he probably finds comforting). Since he sees no reason to bother about what kind of job his lawyers are supposed to do — he’s secure knowing that the GOP Death Cult has the GOP Senate under its thrall, and besides it’s not as though Trump’s gonna pay those shysters — might as well be fronted by “the best in their class”...

As for the lawyers themselves, I assume some associates of the official Republican party showed up with a couple of ‘just tell us how many zeroes’ blank checks, plus maybe wink-wink promises of due consideration for the next sufficiently wealthy rapist-client. Or maybe there’s just no such thing as bad publicity, once you’ve publicly defended Bill Cosby or Jeffrey Epstein.

Exclusive, behind-the-scenes look at meeting of Trump legal team at Mar-a-Lago: pic.twitter.com/UzveWFeqHw

— Michael Beschloss (@BeschlossDC) January 31, 2021

trump hiring an impeachment attorney known for representing jeffrey epstein and the russian mob is a little on the nose but i realize we are not doing subtlety these days

— Peloton InfoSec Analyst (Incident Response) (@CalmSporting) January 31, 2021

Amazing he wasn't on the Trump impeachment defense a lot earlier than this. https://t.co/yfCbs2jj0m

— Tom Nichols (@RadioFreeTom) January 31, 2021

Trump wants a performative defense and not an actual defense because he knows that Republicans will acquit him no matter what he does https://t.co/LQoGGzzM7X

— Keren Goldenberg (@GoldenbergLaw) January 31, 2021

You can see Trump loosing all his lawyers as funny, or you can see it as tragic because he’s going to win no matter what because at least 45 Republican senators are amoral, spineless sedition apologists.

— Giantsecretspacehat (@Popehat) January 31, 2021

he is CLEARLY not taking advice from anyone with half a clue so realistically why would he even feel the need to pay for advice from the crazy lawyer bin that’s going to be just as bad as the advice he gives himself for free?

— kilgore trout, back in some form (@KT_So_It_Goes) January 31, 2021

he would absolutely love to just make a total mockery of the thing by not following any rules, just responding WRONG to anything he’s accused of, and making the republicans eat a big shit sandwich while he watches

— kilgore trout, back in some form (@KT_So_It_Goes) January 31, 2021

The Democrats will have, one hopes, tons of video showing Trump encouraging his cultists to commit a violent insurrection, killing police officers (and each other) while desecrating the seat of American legislative power. And the odds are that the Republicans will still vote to acquit, but there’s always hope for the Media Village Idiots that the defendant will, like William Jennings Bryant, succumb to an apoplexy from the excitement. (You think there’s not a Trump Impeachment Death Pool with either Maggie Haberman or Chuck Todd holding the bet book?)

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Reader Interactions

24Comments

  1. 1.

    Just Chuck

    February 1, 2021 at 2:46 am

    I lay odds that even these two will end up quitting.  No one can work with T.

  2. 2.

    opiejeanne

    February 1, 2021 at 3:14 am

    @Just Chuck:  I just told mr opiejeanne that they’ll be gone by Wednesday.

  3. 3.

    John Revolta

    February 1, 2021 at 3:19 am

    I was wondering if these two guys might not have been on the books already, or at least being talked to, in connection with Trumpf’s upcoming rape defamation suit by E. Jean Carroll. The guy can’t exactly be picky about his lawyers lately.

  4. 4.

    mrmoshpotato

    February 1, 2021 at 3:40 am

    and then in 2017, *tried to sue the Cosby victim*

    When Trump trash sends their people, they’re not sending their best.  They’re possibly on drugs.  They don’t prosecute criminals.  They try to sue the victims of rapists.  And some, I assume, are also the Kremlin’s bitches.

  5. 5.

    mrmoshpotato

    February 1, 2021 at 3:45 am

    he would absolutely love to just make a total mockery of the thing by not following any rules, just responding WRONG to anything he’s accused of, and making the republicans eat a big shit sandwich while he watches

    I hope the Trump trash Nazi party is hungry. Order up!

  6. 6.

    ?BillinGlendaleCA

    February 1, 2021 at 4:19 am

    @mrmoshpotato: Remember, Only The Best and Be Best!

     

  7. 7.

    NotMax

    February 1, 2021 at 4:20 am

    “He paid us in steaks? Goddamn, how long have these things been in the freezer?”

    //

  8. 8.

    mrmoshpotato

    February 1, 2021 at 4:28 am

    @NotMax: “Why do these all say ‘Use or freeze by 10/15/97’?”

    And it will always be hilarious and concerning that The Sharper Image was selling meat!

  9. 9.

    NotMax

    February 1, 2021 at 4:31 am

    Alternate snark.

    “Get a load of this. He wants us to sue the House of Representatives for libel.”

    //

  10. 10.

    JoyceH

    February 1, 2021 at 4:58 am

    If these lawyers came onboard after the other guys walked because the client wanted to make the stolen election argument, does that mean that they ARE willing to make that argument? Ought to be interesting.

  11. 11.

    NotMax

    February 1, 2021 at 5:03 am

    @JoyceH

    “You’ve heard the arguments we’ve been instructed by our client to present and based on those ask you acquit him as not being responsible by reason of insanity.”

  12. 12.

    Suburban Mom

    February 1, 2021 at 5:09 am

    @JoyceH: I was wondering the same, especially as one is from PA and the other from Georgia.  Sort of helps the narrative.

  13. 13.

    satby

    February 1, 2021 at 6:22 am

    testing… no comments for more than an hour?

  14. 14.

    Geminid

    February 1, 2021 at 6:27 am

    @satby: (test) Rabbit Rabbit! (test) Rabbit Rabbit!

  15. 15.

    sab

    February 1, 2021 at 6:30 am

    @Geminid: We always used to say that on the first day of the month. Is that still a thing?

  16. 16.

    prostratedragon

    February 1, 2021 at 6:33 am

    Rabbit rabbit. And Happy Birthday James P. Johnson!

    “Jungle Drums” by James Price Johnson; Marco Fumo, piano

  17. 17.

    SFAW

    February 1, 2021 at 6:34 am

    And the odds are that the Republicans will still vote to acquit

    Funny, I thought odds were given only on things for which the outcome was in doubt. The Party of TRAITORS will never let him be convicted.

  18. 18.

    Geminid

    February 1, 2021 at 6:40 am

    @sab: “Rabbit rabbit!” is still around, although I don’t think I heard it till a few years ago. I don’t know it’s origin, but I kind of like it.

  19. 19.

    lowtechcyclist

    February 1, 2021 at 6:45 am

    The Democrats should make it clear from the get-go: the Republican Party is on trial here.

    The case against Donald Trump is open-and-shut: not only did he incite the attack on the Capitol, he sat back and watched it on the teevee, and rather than using his Presidential powers to summon help to protect Congress, he kept on watching his must-see TV.

    This is all about whether the Republican Party is OK with this.

    They are, of course. But this is the Dems’ chance to put the full spotlight on that. And they should not just let it drop afterwards either.

  20. 20.

    montanareddog

    February 1, 2021 at 6:59 am

    @lowtechcyclist: The Dems should let it be known to the Repugs in the Senate that they (the Dems) actually want an acquittal as they plan to hammer Repugs with it henceforward, and that they look forward to Donnie being the 2024 candidate. Thus, Cleek guarantees a conviction and a disqualification from further office.

  21. 21.

    RepubAnon

    February 1, 2021 at 7:54 am

    @lowtechcyclist: Yes, I’d suggest that after Trump admits to inciting a coup, federal prosecutors step in and indict Trump based on his admissions.

  22. 22.

    trnc

    February 1, 2021 at 8:08 am

    @JoyceH: ​
     

    If these lawyers came onboard after the other guys walked because the client wanted to make the stolen election argument, does that mean that they ARE willing to make that argument?

    Still seems like a stretch, given that they have no evidence to work with. It’s one thing for Half Ass Nosferatu to try to argue voter fraud with no evidence in a non-televised court proceeding, and quite another to do it in front of 50 million or more live viewers.

  23. 23.

    Aziz, light!

    February 1, 2021 at 10:39 am

    Kent nailed this yesterday. Trump will turn this into the usual circus in which he is the ringmaster. The “jury” has already voted so he knows he will face no consequences. His cult will lap it up. Dems won’t be able to turn the outcome against the GOP in 2022 because the voters have the attention span of gnats.

  24. 24.

    wmd

    February 1, 2021 at 12:34 pm

    I want to see Pence under oath testifying about the call for him to be hanged, and questioned about what that means for the ability of Senators to do their jobs. Maybe bring in his family for similar questions.

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