Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

I’d hate to be the candidate who lost to this guy.

I also would like a pony to improve my balloon juice experience.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

We know you aren’t a Democrat but since you seem confused let me help you.

Yeah, with this crowd one never knows.

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

“That’s what the insurrection act is for!”

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

If senate republicans had any shame, they’d die of it.

Let us savor the impending downfall of lawless scoundrels who richly deserve the trouble barreling their way.

Many life forms that would benefit from greater intelligence, sadly, do not have it.

Good lord, these people are nuts.

If you are still in the gop, you are either an extremist yourself, or in bed with those who are.

If you thought you’d already seen people saying the stupidest things possible on the internet, prepare yourselves.

I was confident that someone would point it out and thought why not me.

Live so that if you miss a day of work people aren’t hoping you’re dead.

Never give a known liar the benefit of the doubt.

The problem people have with Biden’s age is the color of the VPs skin.

We’re not going back!

Even though I know this is a bad idea, I’m off to do it anyway!

… riddled with inexplicable and elementary errors of law and fact

“Why isn’t this Snickers bar only a nickel?”

I’ve spoken to my cat about this, but it doesn’t seem to do any good.

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG!

BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG!

by | 124 Comments

This post is in: 

A Politico reporter tweets:

BIG BIG News in @playbookplus today: GOP leader McCarthy told Steering members he’d speak w/ HOYER to try to broker a deal: He would offer to remove Greene from one panel — Education and Labor — if Dems back off a House floor vote to remove her from both.

Imagine if you were so invested in beltway gossip that the hint of KevinMac offering this weak-ass “deal” is BIG BIG  news.

Also, imagine a mindset where Republicans offering a totally shit deal to Democrats is big news.  That’s been happening every hour on the hour since Biden was sworn in, and every day since St. Ronnie was President.  Still, I find the tweet entertaining because of the abject weakness and stupidity on display.

BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG!

On a somewhat related topic, I’ve been thinking about the contestants for the Starburst Prize:  Greene, Boebert and Noem.  I have to agree with Adam that Greene is in first place.  Noem actually did something, or should I say did nothing, in South Dakota, a state where 1 in 500 residents are now dead of COVID.  Even in post-truth Foxmerica, that has to matter.  Boebert is a petty grifter who might have lied about mileage reimbursement to raid her campaign fund.  Class A grifting is more sophisticated than this penny ante stuff.  Only Greene has retained the purity of essence necessary to capture the modern Republican Party.

(For those of you with short memories, the Starburst Prize is named after Rich Lowry’s comments on Sarah Palin.  That’s the actual prize pictured above, available on Etsy.  And, no, I’ve never tasted them, and though I agree that they’re a concoction, I doubt that they’re “Mexican”.)

Reader Interactions

124Comments

  4. 4.

    RepubAnon

    Reporter: “The Republicans offered Democrats a deal – if the Democrats do everything the Republicans want, they’ll stop with the Satanist cannibal accusations and limit themselves to calling Democrats ‘Traitors who hate America.’ In the spirit of national unity, shouldn’t Democrats accept this offer?”

    (/snark)

    NOTE: In real world negotiations, the response is “Hey, Republicans – you can’t be serious. What’s your real offer?”

  6. 6.

    Baud

    Not that it would be sufficient, but had Greene even apologized for the actions that led us to this point?

  7. 7.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @Baud:

    Not that it would be sufficient, but had Greene even apologized for the actions that led us to this point?

    Supposedly she said something at the private caucus meeting last night.  That’s it, and it sure ain’t much.

  8. 8.

    sdhays

    Is it really accurate to call Kevin McCarthy the “Leader” of the House Republicans? When was the last time he “led” them to do anything? Does he even deserve credit for Liz Cheney keeping her position?

  9. 9.

    Jersey Tomato

    I had Boebert pegged as the official Attention Whore of 117th Congress. She came out strong, waving around her My Pretty Pony pop-gun and giving Capitol tours to insurrectionists, but Greene has come from behind and is leaving her in the dust.

  12. 12.

    prufrock

    I don’t get Greene being a Starburst candidate.  She is not attractive enough.

    I know that is completely superficial, but this is the Starburst category we’re talking about.

  14. 14.

    karen marie

    @Baud: There is no apologizing that would be sufficient. She’s a crazy person and has no business on any committee, period.

  19. 19.

    david

    Josh Marshall@joshtpm · 8h

    lol apparently insurrection Boebert was driving 164 miles a day every day during the campaign – that’s what she billed her campaign for at least

    I’m not sure what the “lol” was about. My last job was in circulation management for a newspaper. Over 6+ years, I AVERAGED over 151 miles a day every day, and was never more than 90 miles away from the newspaper office.

    Now, do I believe she probably fudged the numbers? Logged a 90 mile journey as 150 miles? Absolutely. That’s a not-so-secret scheme that many/most delivery people employ to maximize their travel reimbursement checks and their deductions on their federal taxes. But, Liberal Twitter acts like this is some unicorn instead of SOP, like they never held a job in the real world among real people.

  22. 22.

    Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix

    @david:  Well, having grown up in the West and now living in the East, you can be liberal or conservative and not understand the vast distances people drive regularly out West.

    That said, Boebert’s pattern of reimbursement is way beyond fudging.  She claimed miles in months where she had zero campaign events, for example.

  23. 23.

    OzarkHillbilly

    @Joey Maloney: Funner fact: They recently figured out how: 2 pairs- one weak one strong- of muscles in their intestines do it.

    They why may never be known.

  25. 25.

    ant

    Greene is the the one who most obviously displays psycho/sociopathic traits. Therefore she’s the one they like the most.

    If someone else comes along who has more cowbell, they’ll switch their allegiance.

  26. 26.

    MontyTheClipArtMongoose

    Those look less like Picante Mexican Starbursts than they do Hungarian Croutons (paprika doused).

    Anyway, it’s 2021, & even Republicans are admitting gender & sexual fluidity (like Rob Portman’s live gay son), so could Rep. Wheels from NC12 be the tortoise to Taylor-Greene’s hare?

  28. 28.

    NotMax

    @OzarkHillbilly

    And thus the game of craps was born.

    :)

    Posted a link to a story about that discovery at the time but much too lazy at 4:30 in the morning to go digging for it.

  29. 29.

    MontyTheClipArtMongoose

    @ant: I contend MTG was generally normal, if not a little basic, when she enrolled at UGA back in the early 90s, but then she got FUH’d too good/hard by one of the usual GARspects & caught TEH DUMB.

  33. 33.

    SiubhanDuinne

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    They why may never be known.

    Some years, or perhaps decades, ago, I came across a theory that the wombats would stack their cubular poops to mark their territory. I believe that theory is now pretty well discredited, but I’m personally quite enchanted by the idea of wombat inukshuks.

  34. 34.

    narya

    I actually think they should take that “deal.” I think a floor vote could come back to haunt them, and it provides too much fodder for the right wing noise machines. Accept that, move on . . . and then quietly undercut her at every single opportunity. Way more effective, way less distraction.

  35. 35.

    WaterGirl

    @Baud: Nope.  She thinks those things don’t count because she did them before she was elected.

    I what world does a grown-up think they get a do-over like that?

  40. 40.

    Woodrow/asim

    @david:  Josh runs the Talking Points Memo website. He’s “Liberal,” but not even remotely part of the Liberal Twitter establishment.​

  41. 41.

    Wag

    That concoction looks like it’d be delicious after being thrown on the grill and wrapped in a tortilla.

  42. 42.

    Baud

    @david:

    The amount of miles isn’t crazy, but it does seem weird to have the same number of miles each day for someone who’s campaigning, as opposed to going to the same worksite every day.

  44. 44.

    Desargues

    Extremely funny to me is that Nikki Haley set her “respectable” future on fire early in the Trump Dark Ages, expecting she’ll inherit some mantle or something — and was clueless about the bug-eyed lunatics waiting in the wings. Like the “base” would choose her over any off-the-shelf white knuckledraggers who will Will Go There (TM).

    Bye, Felicia, um, I mean, Nikki!

    Looking forward to the 2024 Repuke convention, when the braying masses will scream “Lock Her Up!” at LIZ CHENEY. Will be a beaut. I hope she’ll have enough self-awareness to blame Immortal Old Daddy and Turdblossom for that. They wanted their wars and tax cuts, and there was no way t get that without letting the beast out of the cage. And now the beast has turned around and taken a big bite our of Daddy’s Girl Liz vanilla ass. Pass ALL the popcorn!

  49. 49.

    Kent

    @Baud:Not that it would be sufficient, but had Greene even apologized for the actions that led us to this point?

    She apologized to the GOP in private for making them look bad.  But she has not once apologized to anyone she has attacked from school shooting victims to Democratic politicians who she called to be assassinated.

    So no.

    If the Dems wanted to play games they should demand that Greene go to the floor of the House and apologize to everyone she has wronged, from the Stoneman Douglas shooting victims to every member of Congress that she called on to be killed.

    Otherwise no deal.

  51. 51.

    narya

    @RobertB: Oh I absolutely think they should do that! I actually think she’ll provide even MORE fodder, and enable the Rs to hang that stinking carcass around their OWN necks. Dub her “the member who thinks murdered children are fake” and call her that EVERY time, in EVERY committee meeting.

  54. 54.

    BruceFromOhio

    if Dems back off a House floor vote to remove her from both.

    Oh, child. Still using the training wheels.
    @germy: ​  Plenty of space for lurking. And the “GQP” thing is catching on.​

    ETA: OK, no bullshit. The House Speaker is not fucking around. This has the double-edge blade of putting McQarthy on the defensive, while firing a shot across the bow to the entire minority: pick a side, and be quick about it.

  57. 57.

    Geminid

    Colorado State Senator Kerry Donovan (Vail) has filed election paperwork to begin a campaign against CO 3rd Representative Lauren Boebert. She joins an attorney and a rancher who have already announced. Boebert defeated a decent, well financed Democrat last November by 6 points.

    Colorado will gain an eighth congressional seat for 2022, so the district will change somewhat. It’s southern border runs along the New Mexico line. While most of the 3rd falls between Utah and the Front Range, it extends east to Pueblo. There is will be lots of coverage of the CO 3rd contest in state and local media.

  61. 61.

    kindness

    Politico…..Hated the place when VandeHei & Harris started and ran it.  It got a little better when they left to form Axios but it still has that suck to it that apparently doesn’t wash nor wear off.

  65. 65.

    brantl

    Hey, MisterMix, please figure out some sort of snark font, would you? When I saw BIG, BIG…. I thought that NY attorneys had pullled Stump out of More-of-Lardo, and arrested him.

  67. 67.

    bmoak

    @Kent: 

    It’s a big district, but there were apparently two months where she did not have a single campaign event and one month where she only had one. Candidates couldn’t really do a lot of traditional small-town, press-the-flesh campaigning last years because of COVID restrictions.

  71. 71.

    Desargues

    @brantl: You should expect snark to be the default setting in Mr Mix’s posts. Just as simmering vitriol was DougJ’s older setting, before he got impulse control. Man, I miss that high. Used to make my day.

  72. 72.

    Kent

    @bmoak:

    @Kent:

    It’s a big district, but there were apparently two months where she did not have a single campaign event and one month where she only had one. Candidates couldn’t really do a lot of traditional small-town, press-the-flesh campaigning last years because of COVID restrictions.

    Not saying that she isn’t lying.  Just that it is very plausible that she drove that much.  Her district is larger than probably a dozen or more states.

  73. 73.

    Geminid

    @BruceFromOhio: Whoever wins the CO 3rd Democratic primary next summer will be carpet bombed with donations. Boebert is the kind of Republican Democrats love to hate. And what with reapportionment and Republican gerrymandering, Democrats may have to pick off some Republican seats just to hold their House majority. My loathsome VA 5th congressman will be a target as well.

  75. 75.

    oldster

    @MattF:

    I second your recommendation. It’s an interesting piece, and worth reading.

    Yes, a little jargony and English Department.  But some good insights.

  78. 78.

    BruceFromOhio

    @Geminid: ​
      The fundraising, GOTV, voter registration, all has to start now now now. Candidates need to know that voters, donors have their backs. GQP ratfucking of the voting process will continue apace in the legislatures, and voters have to get out ahead of it, or get trapped playing catch-up.

  79. 79.

    rp

    @kgus:  Cups of cut up fresh fruit sprinkled with chili powder are common in mexico. The starburst are probably a (gross) riff on that.

  82. 82.

    Jeffro

    Looks like at least one of the last remaining members of the GOP ‘gets it’: Romney Introduces Child Benefit of $3k for Millions of American Families.

    Smart!  Not enough to save the Grand Old Party, or get ol’ Mitt* elected, but smart(ish)

    *he has to be thinking, “Biden was 78 when he got elected…I know I can do this!…I’ll only be 77 in 2024!!”

    Romney’s new plan, like the one being explored by senior Democrats, would provide the benefit monthly by depositing it directly in taxpayer bank accounts. Advocates for expanding child benefits say they will make an enormous dent in child poverty in the United States, although some conservative scholars argue the benefits may discourage parents from pursuing employment. The extent of GOP support for Romney’s proposal is unclear.

    Further down the article, it’s pretty clear that this is not new money…just a classic Republican bait-and-switch…

    Unlike Democrats’ plan, Romney’s Family Security Act would be paid for, in part, by eliminating Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, a welfare program, as well as other existing federal tax credits for children and working families. Many Democrats are likely to oppose this part of Romney’s plan.

    Ah well, Mitt, you almost had me there!  Now back to the GQP with you!!

  83. 83.

    Tony Jay

    @prufrock:

    Sure it’s superficial, but when you’re talking about Republican voters and starbursts…..

    Anyway, I don’t get the theory that Greene wins the QILF award. In the pictures I’ve seen she looks like post-boxing career Mickey Rourke in a Goldust wig.

  84. 84.

    Betty Cracker

    McCarthy is pretending he doesn’t know how to pronounce “Q-on” and claims he doesn’t even know what it is. JFC. I’ve seen more dignified disavowals from people accused of farting.

  85. 85.

    Just Chuck

    Honestly it’s a tempting offer: nothing would torque the (R-Crazytown) representative more than getting knocked down by her fellow repubs.  With a stipulation that this doesn’t indemnify her for the next outburst, which will cost her another seat — perhaps her congressional one.

  86. 86.

    Scout211

    Noem seems to me to be more starbursty. Or maybe more like a Trumpette, Trumper? Trumpista?

    She smiles at the camera, all sparkly and well-styled, with great lighting and big hair, spouting off how great she is and how wonderful she is and how much she is the best, best,  best Governor evah! And then her nonactions have ended killing many citizens of her state.

    She is the heir apparent of the reality TV president. Boebert and Greene seem more obvious and over the top. Noem is more worrisome to me because she sells it, with sparkle.

  88. 88.

    Geminid

    @BruceFromOhio: Democrats in Virginia are on their toes, with a Democratic legislature that protects voting rights. The same is true for Colorado, I believe. I worry about states like Georgia, though. Lucy McBath in 2018 and Carolyn Bordeaux in 2020 hold seats in the north Atlanta suburbs that had been Republican for decades. Republicans in the state legislature will try to gerrymander one or both out of office. Kansas Republicans will try to do the same to Sharice Davids.

  90. 90.

    Keith P.

    How crazy is it that out of all the “Young Guns” (Cantor, Ryan, et al), McCarthy is the last man standing?

  95. 95.

    Jeffro

    @Scout211: Haley and Noem are worth worrying about, politically.

    Greene and Boebert are a concern only if they make it around the House metal detectors.

  96. 96.

    Geminid

    @Keith P.: Cantor lost a primary to a tea party type. Now his VA 7th District is held by Abigail Spanberger. Ryan retired of course, but maybe not permanently. The congressional Republicans still have a “Young Guns” program, though, that supports candidates thought to have a chance to flip seats.  Jim Oberweis, who lost narrowly to Congresswoman Lauren Underwood in the western Chicago suburbs, was in the Young Guns program. Oberweis is 70 years old.

  97. 97.

    MisterForkbeard

    @Betty Cracker: The whole thing is disingenuous trolling. That’s the entire GOP.

    Even about this, Greene wrote a published rant (which we have in writing – there’s no doubt she did this) about Jewish Space Lasers. She disingenuously says she doesn’t know anything about it. McCarthy disingenuously says he believes her and no one really knows what QAnon is anyway, it’s just not that serious. And then disingenuously attacks Democrats for trying to hold her accountable.

    I mean, that’s it. Lie to everyone. Gaslight all the time. Just make sure you end it with a farcical attack on Democrats.

  99. 99.

    H.E.Wolf

    @Jeffro: @Scout211: Haley and Noem are worth worrying about, politically.

     
    Wikepedia lists them both as age 49, which is almost at the “past sell date” for would-be sexy female politicians in the Republican party. Republicans tend to prefer them younger than that.

    One hasn’t heard much from Republicans about that Palin woman’s sexual appeal since she entered her 50s.

  100. 100.

    HalfAssedHomesteader

    Pretty sure those starbursts are harvested from cinema[1] floors.

    __________

    1 Big rooms people willingly sat in with other people to watch movies, sometimes even together.

  102. 102.

    Barbara

    @H.E.Wolf: ​My view is that Haley will have spent too long out of any official elected position. She left the U.N. at least one year before the end of Trump’s term. She was governor of South Carolina for, I think, just one term. She has some PAC that keeps sending me the same email over and over again about being “laser focused” on the 2022 midterms. But at this point she is more of a political operative than someone with a working political portfolio.

    Unless Noem finds a patron, I don’t see how she can master the kind of organizational and fund raising juggernaut you need to become president. South Dakota is a very small state, and my assumption is that she thinks she could win at the retail politics of Iowa and New Hampshire and jump start her way to bigger things. That didn’t work for Ted Cruz, but some of it will depend on who she is running against.​

  103. 103.

    The Moar You Know

    Mexican here. Never seen them.

    @Low Key Swagger:  I have. Seems to be more of a “SoCal Mexican” thing than an actual “Mexico Mexican” thing. The little market down by me has them.

  104. 104.

    burnspbesq

    Yes, they are sweet treats. Every Liverpool player will receive one the next time the team scores at home.

  105. 105.

    Miss Bianca

    @david: Yeah, most of these people have never been to CO CD-3. Distance driving in rural CO is a thing. Until this past year, I routinely put 20-25,000 miles on my car per year just driving between my various gigs. Going to Salida and back in one day, which I still do about once per week, puts a 120-mile rt on my odometer.

    That said, do I doubt that Boebert fudged her mileage, and do I blame her for putting in those miles campaigning during a fucking pandemic? Sure I do.

  106. 106.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @Four Seasons Total Landscaping mistermix: Well, having grown up in the West and now living in the East, you can be liberal or conservative and not understand the vast distances people drive regularly out West.

    I had a friend living in SLC seriously into drama who would drive to & from a Shakespeare festival in southern Utah on weekday evenings to catch a single play. Four hours each way – and she always showed up on time next day at the office.  Scared the crap out of this Easterner.​

  110. 110.

    artem1s

    @Barbara: 

    publicly apologize out of fear that an apology would be used against her in defamation suits.

    I think it has more to do with the death threats she will get. The GOP is fine with Dems having their families threatened by the wingnut conspiracy militias but they flee in panic when the attention is turned on them

  111. 111.

    VOR

    @Barbara:  Noem has more charisma than Ted Cruz, but then again I’ve scraped things off the bottom of my shoes with more charisma than Ted Cruz.

  112. 112.

    MisterForkbeard

    This thread is a little old, but I think one question is whether the reporter thinks the big news is that McCarthy tried to negotiate a weakass deal with Hoyer instead of Pelosi.

    Also: McCarthy should have just kicked her off the Education committee and said her presence there was not appropriate, given her past comments about education and school shootings, but that she might be reinstated over time if she’d shown growth. And then dared Dems to do more.

    But that would involve acknowledging that a Republican had done something wrong, and wouldn’t cause maximal harm to Democrats at the expense of the nation so that’s right out.

  114. 114.

    Barbara

    @MisterForkbeard: ​ I think McCarthy just truly isn’t strategic and basically has no idea how to deal with Greene. The fact that he wants to negotiate with Dems in order to decide the fate of a member of his own caucus is more than a tell — it’s a blaring siren that he is way, way over his head here.​

  117. 117.

    Ruckus

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Have to agree, even as a fact, fun?

    Or maybe our snark meters are still so out of wack because of the last 400 years that we’ve had to experience of the shitforbrains maladministration.

  118. 118.

    catclub

    @Baud: ​
     

    A fake but seemingly heart felt Oral Roberts type of mea culpa

    Is she going to promise the Lord will take her away if you don’t send enough money?

  119. 119.

    Ruckus

    @Betty Cracker:

    Back from my long walk, so I’m sure someone else has pointed this out but she really does have a rather punchable face.

    Not that I’m suggesting that, just that yes, she does, and she also seems to go out of her way to give numerous reasons to deserve one.

    To be one of the boys, do you have to play by boy’s rules?

  120. 120.

    Dopey-o

    @david: Now, do I believe she (Boebert) probably fudged the numbers? Logged a 90 mile journey as 150 miles? Absolutely. That’s a not-so-secret scheme that many/most delivery people employ to maximize their travel reimbursement checks and their deductions on their federal taxes. But, Liberal Twitter acts like this is some unicorn instead of SOP, like they never held a job in the real world among real people.

    Let’s see the receipts for gasoline / diesel purchases. Most of us who drive these kinds of routes keep logbooks, or pocket notebooks to record odometer readings.

    Or let’s just see the odometer. I know that my my repair shop / oil change / state safety inspection reports  mark down the odometer readings when my car enters their shop. As Aristotle once wrote “It ain’t rocket surgery!”

  122. 122.

    SteverinoCT

    @Dopey-o: 
    Technology to the rescue! To claim mileage, I have to calculate every trip on Google Maps, stops included, and go by that: it is embedded in the expensing app, so no fudging. If I go a different way, I have to add fake waypoints to force the route. And of course it automatically deducts the 50 miles of my normal commute if I drive straight from home.

  124. 124.

    J R in WV

    @Tony Jay: ​
     

    Anyway, I don’t get the theory that Greene wins the QILF award. In the pictures I’ve seen she looks like post-boxing career Mickey Rourke in a Goldust wig.

    We have a neighbor/acquaintance who has severe psychological problems, when she goes off her meds she can be very odd. She looks amazingly like Marjorie Greene in the face — quite shocking really.

    She got a job as an overnight custodian at the county high school, briefly. She was captured on video taking fish out of a large aquarium and fixing them for a lite night snack. Marjorie Q Greene has that same look about her. Stone crazy, off and on. No question about it. Also perhaps damaged sometime in the past, but that’s not the same as crazy, is it?

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