Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Make the republican party small enough to drown in a bathtub.

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

In after Baud. Damn.

Pessimism assures that nothing of any importance will change.

If you can’t control your emotions, someone else will.

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

GOP baffled that ‘we don’t care if you die’ is not a winning slogan.

Teach a man to fish, and he’ll sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Do we throw up our hands or do we roll up our sleeves? (hint, door #2)

Republicans got rid of McCarthy. Democrats chose not to save him.

Let’s bury these fuckers at the polls 2 years from now.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires Republicans to act in good faith.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

The worst democrat is better than the best republican.

It is possible to do the right thing without the promise of a cookie.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

Republicans do not pay their debts.

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

Impressively dumb. Congratulations.

You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.

You are here: Home / Open Threads / Monday Afternoon Open Thread

Monday Afternoon Open Thread

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Earlier today on Twitter, “testical tanning” was a trending topic. Why? Because Tucker Carlson is projecting his personal concerns about “low T” onto the nation (or at least half of it).

The good doctor’s thread thoroughly debunks this nonsense. But there’s a possibility Carlson’s audience will roast their wedding tackle under a heat lamp, thus rendering themselves unable to reproduce and providing a long-term solution to our immediate fascism problem. I thought y’all should know.

Open thread!

Reader Interactions

199Comments

  2. 2.

    bluegirlfromwyo

    Carlson’s audience will roast their wedding tackle under a heat lamp, thus rendering themselves unable to reproduce and providing a long-term solution to our immediate fascism problem.

    Could FSM possibly love us that much?

  3. 3.

    Emma from Miami

    I have a vision of Tucker sitting in an ice bath to cool his “fever”  *snickersnort

  4. 4.

    Elie

    Honestly — its like these folks got infected with the stupid virus…  Could anyone take this seriously??

  6. 6.

    MagdaInBlack

    It’s been a long time since I’ve seen the phrase “wedding tackle” used. You made me spit my tea, Betty. Thank you !

  9. 9.

    germy

    After months of discouraging people from getting any COVID vaccines, while simultaneously refusing to answer if he himself was vaccinated, Tucker Carlson has finally given an answer. He says he is not vaccinated, and continues to refuse to be vaccinated against COVID-19.

    In December, Fox’s policy was changed, and all employees who worked in its New York City headquarters offices were required receive at least one coronavirus vaccination shot by Dec. 27.

    Fox News did not immediately respond to TheWrap’s request for comment.

    Does tucker broadcast remotely from his own mountain lair or is he an in-studio guy?  I don’t watch him so I don’t know.

  11. 11.

    trollhattan

    Welcome, assholes. And please enjoy our seven-buck/gallon diesel, you useless work-avoiding bags of goo. BTW I’ve phoned Antifa on the 1-800 line, and they should be reaching out presently.

    A group referred to as the “People’s Convoy” arrived in Sacramento on Monday morning, circling downtown streets and blaring horns in trucks and other vehicles. It’s the first of an apparent three-day stint of events planned at California’s state Capitol in protest of coronavirus restrictions. The first event, with a permit granted to the “Unified Americans Convoy of California” from 7 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday on the north side of the Capitol, is permitted for 200 attendees, California Highway Patrol permit records show. The second permit, given to “The Peoples Convoy California” for a demonstration on the west side of the Capitol, is scheduled from 1:30 p.m. to 6 p.m. for 300 attendees.

    Videos on social media and livestreams from attendees, though, showed that members of the convoy had spilled over from the north side and began to crash an unrelated, permitted event scheduled for the west side at 11 a.m. The event by the Prosecutors Alliance of California intended to give resources to crime survivors, according to its permit.

    https://www.sacbee.com/news/coronavirus/article260523052.html#storylink=cpy

    Is there anything more last-year than the trucker protest?

  13. 13.

    Joe Falco

    The phrase “tanned, rested and ready” will never be the same for presidential campaigns.

  14. 14.

    MattF

    So, the lil’Tucker (pun intended) is poking into an area of concern. Medically. Well, he’s getting into the age group where the condition of one’s prostate is a possible cause of anxiety. Needs some Flo-Max, I’d guess.

  15. 15.

    CaseyL

    It’s truly weird performances like this that make me wonder if there is anything at all animating Carlson other than a desperate, unquenchable need for attention.

  16. 16.

    jl

    Wait… the linked twitter tweets say that men have something called a tunica VAGINAlis? Proof of rampant feminization of our menfolk right there. These libs can’t hide the awful truth.

  17. 17.

    Scout211

    @trollhattan:

    It’s the first of an apparent three-day stint of events planned at California’s state Capitol in protest of coronavirus restrictions.

     

    What California coronavirus restrictions? Masks for healthcare workers and facilities? That’s the only one that I see right now.

    But let’s not confuse them and their performance with facts.

  18. 18.

    Suzanne

    But there’s a possibility Carlson’s audience will roast their wedding tackle under a heat lamp, thus rendering themselves unable to reproduce and providing a long-term solution to our immediate fascism problem.

    Naturally selecting themselves out of reproductive condition is not the worst thing.

  20. 20.

    MomSense

    I learned a couple weeks ago that Fucker has a place in Maine.  He apparently constructed a large barn which he has been using for his own tv studio.  The person who told me thinks he was spending most of his time here and not at the FUX studios.

  25. 25.

    Yutsano

    This is not the worst part. The worst part is he has supposedly spawned. His “children” are going to need so much therapy…

  26. 26.

    delk

    It’s Tucker’s ‘get-out-of-jail-free’ card. He can push any conspiracy theories and bigoted lies and if he gets called on it (or sued) he will say nobody should take him seriously. Would a serious news journalist have a segment on testes tanning?

  27. 27.

    JCJ

    I imagine the men who will put there balls under a sunlamp are likely the same that would take hydroxychloroquine (despite not having an autoimmune disorder) or ivermectin.

  29. 29.

    scav

    It’s certainly a new and somewhat unexpected twist to marketing oneself to one’s adoring fans: “Hey Guys!  We’re all insufficiently manly! Let’s have a spa day!”

  30. 30.

    Enhanced Voting Techniques

    You all do understand most of Tucker’s audience is older guys and  guys in the middle of a midlife crises are notorious for doing stupid shit and falling for obvious scams. God knows I went threw that with my own dad when he bought a sports truck and I had to saved him from some scammer cleaning my dad’s savings out by pretending to be my dad and just trolling that slimy huckster until the grifter got so pissed he stomped off in a huff.

  32. 32.

    hueyplong

    This story almost seems too good to be true.

    It’s like when the “tell them to drink bleach” thing actually came true.

    Surely Tucker can think of some magical home usage for mercury next.

  33. 33.

    jl

    @scav: IIRC, hot balls reduce sperm count. That’s the reason infections that produce fevers temporarily reduce fertility, and IIRC is not a special feature of covid.

    And of course, there is the no true Scotsman (would not wear a kilt) angle.

    Edit: Oh crap, I forgot that the kilt is a dress!! Difficult choices, hard decisions!

    Edit2: OTOH, true Scotsman can tan their balls at will, so there is that. I’ll watch the Tucker Balls show after all. Probably full of one weird tricks and secret tips like that.

  34. 34.

    Old School

    Who would have guessed this was possible?

    Beanstalk cryptocurrency loses $182m of reserves in flash ‘attack’

    Raider gains voting rights over digital currency and uses them to transfer contents of treasury

    The Beanstalk cryptocurrency has been stripped of reserves valued at more than $180m (£138m) in seconds, after an attacker used borrowed money to snap up enough voting rights to transfer the money away.
     

  35. 35.

    Kent

    “Great balls of fire!”

    Let’s see if we can get them to soak their balls in rubbing alcohol (or bourbon)  and set them on fire.  That would be even better.

  36. 36.

    Gravenstone

    Dare we tell Tuckems that it takes UV light, not red/infrared to cause tanning? Of course, that’d be a mighty sensitive area to inadvertently sunburn…

  37. 37.

    Mike in NC

    I have no doubt that Carlson likes to display his testicles to female staffers at FOX “News”. He’s going down the same path that got his predecesor Bill O fired for sexual harassment.

  38. 38.

    Roger Moore

    @Old School:

    I keep saying to anyone who will listen that cryptocurrency is an attempt to recreate the financial system without any regulation.  Since most of that regulation is there to control scams, you can imagine what the result looks like.

  40. 40.

    Tony Jay

    Ah yes, the New Conservative Man’s centrally-approved group activity. Tuckering the sin out of each others leathery golfbags three times a week while the womenfolk give quiet thanks for the conjugal hiatus brought on by too frequent ‘red-capping’.

    Silly bastards

  41. 41.

    Spanky

    Tanning is a response to UV light, not IR. So basically, absolutely everything remotely scientific about this shit show is wrong.

  42. 42.

    Dan B

    One favorite response to Tucker’s “bromeopathy” video is (paraphrasing), “I’m sitting next to my gay husband, leading my gay kife, reading a gay novel as research for my gay novel, and Tucker Carlson’s video is more gay than anything I’m doing.”  The video is more homoerotic than most gay porn.  It’s revealing of Tucker’s inner fantasy of naked young muscly men without any women getting in their fantasy.  This is why they want gays to be invisible.  We burst their life in their toxic masculinity world.

  44. 44.

    Redshift

    @Elie:

    Honestly — its like these folks got infected with the stupid virus…  Could anyone take this seriously??

    In the days of conservative mailing lists (snail mail) back in the 70s, they discovered that people who signed up for those lists were a gold mine for commercial marketing, and hence conservative “leaders” could make a bundle selling the lists. They’ve been selecting for gullibility in the decades since.

    So yeah, the people who watch Fox or OAN or listen to InfoWars absolutely believe this stuff, because the kind of people who would believe this stuff are who they’ve sought out for their audience. (That they’re also gullible enough to swallow all the non-commercial obvious BS is just a bonus.)

  45. 45.

    JPL

    @MomSense: Months ago, there was an article written about his studio in Maine.

    I found this, but am blocked from reading.   Since it’s a Bangor paper, maybe you have access.

    link

  49. 49.

    Dan B

    @jl: Prepare to have your inner homo revealed by Tucker’s sweaty fantasy.

    There should be a followip questionnaire:

    On a scale of one to six how much did your testosterone level increase after watching this?

  51. 51.

    MomSense

    @JPL: 
    I think the studio in Bryant Pond fell through. That was an old grange hall or something near his vacation house. This is something I hadn’t heard about. He apparently has a big property/compound in a completely different place with a large house and new barn.

  52. 52.

    Scout211

    Interesting take on why Carlson’s “unvaccinated” status does not violate Fox’s COVID policy.

     

    [Brian] Stelter is not the first guy you would expect to defend Carlson, but it’s a cut-and-dry case. If it is true that Carlson is not vaccinated, he is not violating any policy. Fox News’ headquarters are located in New York City where employees are required to have a vaccination against Covid to work in-office. This would put the company in compliance with New York City’s mandates for inoculations. Previously to this, the company offered a test-out option for those wishing to avoid the vaccine, which at the time was in compliance with New York City law.

    Tucker Carlson, however, is not based in New York and has regularly been hosting his show remotely. He frequently broadcasts from a custom-built studio near his home in Maine.

    This would not put him in violation of any known company policy. Carlson ditched Washington D.C. for the slower pace of Maine after a group of Antifa activists showed up at his D.C. home in 2018, vandalizing it and harassing his family.

  53. 53.

    scav

    Imagine all the manly manly bedrock patriots anxiously sending each other dick pics late at night desperate for reassurance that they’re tanned enough.  The covert glimpses and comparisons in public urinals. Oh! I hope they’re wearing bibs as they glug their bleach so if they dribble they don!t lose more virile coloration.

  57. 57.

    JPL

    @MomSense: I did search the NYTimes for the article that I saw, and it wasn’t there.   What I remember is that he and family stayed in Maine during the pandemic.   He did broadcast from home

    you could be neighbors.

  58. 58.

    Betty Cracker

    Speaking of sociopaths, Madison Cawthorn fired a staffer who has since filed a wrongful firing  complaint on FMLA grounds and is now spilling all kinds of tea. Story at Smoky Mountain News:

    Saying in a leaked recording that “we all want the ultimate goal of him never serving again,” Lisa Wiggins, a former caseworker and campaign aide to Rep. Madison Cawthorn (R-Henderson) has filed an employment-related campaign against the embattled congressman.

    “What he’s done to me was illegal, morally wrong, you name it, it’s been done,” Wiggins said in a phone call to David Wheeler, co-founder of nonpartisan advocacy PAC American Muckrakers, more commonly known as Fire Madison Cawthorn…

    Wiggins went on to make a number of other claims against her former employer, including more liquor bottles in the Hendersonville office than water bottles, and that she hadn’t seen the congressman she worked for since October…

    “As far as the candidate himself, I mean, he’s just a bad person. He’s a habitual liar and he’s going to say and do anything he can to your face but behind your back he’s completely opposite,” she said. “There’s some good stories I have – a lot of good stories.”

    Do tell, Ms. Wiggins!

  61. 61.

    Citizen Alan

    @Old School:  The thing that pisses me off the most about  Crypto currency is that when it finally inevitably collapses, every goddamned libertarian in the country will demand a government bail out.

  62. 62.

    Old School

    @JPL:

    I did search the NYTimes for the article that I saw, and it wasn’t there.

    Maybe because Tucker threatened the reporter.

    Fox News host Tucker Carlson lashed out on air at Belfast freelance reporter Murray Carpenter Monday, July 20, according to an Associated Press story published Tuesday in The New York Times, claiming that Carpenter was working on a piece for The Times in which the address of Carlson’s Maine home in Bryant Pond would be published. The story was to be about Carlson’s plans to spend more time at his Maine home, where he is reportedly building a broadcast studio.

    On his show Monday night, he broadcast the names of Carpenter and photographer Tristan Spinski, along with a photo of Carpenter, and threatened to publish their addresses and pictures of their homes. Some of his estimated 4 million viewers responded by publishing what they said were addresses for the two journalists, as well as a phone number for Carpenter and a photo of Spinski’s home, The AP said.

  63. 63.

    Hoodie

    @jl: Not many opportunities for tanning much of anything in Scotland . . .  This thing reeks of white male panic about powerlessness, otherwise known as empowering people other than white males.  This thing is so ridiculous it’s pretty clear that Carlson is just punking these dopes and laughing all the way to the bank.  Pure cynicism.

  64. 64.

    Calouste

    @Dan B: Reminds me of Dan Savage commenting about some Republican (maybe Rick Santorum): “He talks more about gay sex than I do, and I’m a gay sex therapist!”

  67. 67.

    Kay

    @Betty Cracker:

     I mean, he’s just a bad person

    Low quality hires. Madison Cawthorne will be considered a conservative statesman compared to the next crop. The standards just get lower and lower.

  68. 68.

    Scout211

    @Old School:

    I did a news search as well. The local reporting started with 2019 articles  about Carlson building a broadcast studio near his house, then articles in 2020 about Carlson being furious that the fact that he was building a studio was leaked, then more articles in 2020 about his decision to “scrap” his plans to build a studio (which in fact, was a lie because he did build the studio).  Then in 2021, his studio was ready to broadcast his show, announcing only that he had a “new set.”

    The article I posted at 52 uses his broadcast studio in Maine as the reason that Carlson is not violating Fox’s vaccination policy. He is based in Maine, not New York.

    Of course Antifa made him move to Maine.
    // ?

  69. 69.

    Brachiator

    THERE IS NOT “SO MUCH DATA” ON TESTICLE TANNING.

    THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO DATA ON TESTICLE TANNING.

    It is beyond strange to see right wing pundits and reporters go to increasingly dangerous and self-harming extremes as they try to cling desperately to insane ideological positions.

    Also, Tucker Carlson is not showing much testicular fortitude. The Democrats drove him…nuts.

  70. 70.

    Ruckus ??

    @Scout211:

    They likey started raising money for this over a year ago and it’s taken them this long to get the money to fuel the 6 pickups and get the permits. And damnit they are going through with it, reality be damned. I mean come on, when has reality ever been within a thousand miles of their wheelhouse?

  71. 71.

    Kay

    @Betty Cracker:

    The Fire Madison Cawthorn PAC endorsed another Cawthorn challenger, Republican Wendy Nevarez, and has encouraged Democrats to re-register as unaffiliated in advance of the April 22 deadline to vote against Cawthorn in the Republican Primary Election.“The ultimate goal of course is to get him out,” Wiggins said. “I’m working harder here than I did for his campaign two years ago, and I mean, I worked really hard two years ago.”

    Screw that. So the people they all call pedophiles are supposed to help them elect a slightly less disgusting far Right Republican so they don’t have to live with this embarrasing evidence of their shitty judgment?

    We’re all just in service to the Republican Party. It is unimagineable to her that a Democratic voter might have a different goal.

    I’d vote to keep him. He’s amusing and he doesn’t do any work anyway. He’s a plus.

  72. 72.

    Suzanne

    @Hoodie:

    This thing reeks of white male panic about powerlessness, otherwise known as empowering people other than white males. 

    Y’all know that I read Dreher’s batshit crazy blog to keep an eye on the crazy. (I may have to stop because the crazy is fucking terrifying, BTW.) But there have been a few interesting comments on the blog in the last couple of weeks. One commenter noted that drug use has stolen the dignity of the white working class and made them ashamed. Multiple commenters have pointed out that it’s the “elites” on the left who went to college who are kicking the asses of social conservatives at getting/staying married and having kids. On a different thread, someone noted that the left “doesn’t preach what they practice”. All in all, the sense I get is just abject terror. They’re so threatened by women, racial minorities, LGBTIQ+ because they are seeing that it’s not just that non-college-educated white men won’t have power in government, not just that they won’t make much money. It’s that they literally will not be able to take a leadership role in a family, they won’t ever have (legitimate) children to pass down a faith tradition, and they’ll probably get into drugs. And they see gay people making families and they’re jealous.

  73. 73.

    Jeffro

    “REPUBLICAN QUACK SCIENCE IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH”…probably too long for a bumper sticker, but maybe could be part of a t-shirt?

    DRINK BLEACH

    BRING UV LIGHT “INSIDE THE BODY”

    GUZZLE HORSE DEWORMER

    SKIP THE MASKS AND VACCINES

    TAN YOUR BALLS

    -GQP, 2022

  77. 77.

    wetzel

    Supposedly this End of Men montage is actually real.

    What doesn’t kill you makes your dong hurt.

    I love how they had a guy drinking raw eggs like Rocky. Drinking raw eggs gives you biotin (B7) deficiency. There is a protein in egg white, avidin, where avidin:biotin Kd dissociation constant is one of lowest measured, so at very low concentrations the avidin will saturate with biotin, and you don’t absorb any biotin and you get the vitamin deficiency.  That guy will experience thinning hair with progression to loss of all hair on the body; scaly, red rash around body openings, etc. Heck yeah!!! Tango and Cash!!!!

  81. 81.

    Suzanne

    @CaseyL: I am sure that a lot of the crazy right wing is closeted and self-hating gay, but I also think we underestimate how many of them are fucken jealous of gay men.

    I think a lot of straight white dudes (mostly Christian, mostly without college education) saw a specific life for themselves as a birthright. That life included being a patriarch and being able to afford stuff like new pickup trucks and to have your pretty, loving, and worshipful wife stay home with the kids, and she would think you were handsome even if you gained weight and didn’t take care of yourself (because self-care is what gay men and aging women do). And people would look up to you with gratitude as a provider because you were The Man.

    And instead, all the women that you want are practicing assortative mating and they make their own money and probably make more than you and they are not into you. And the beauty ideal has shifted and everyone laughed at the idea of Blake Shelton being considered sexy (but you kinda look like Blake Shelton). And you can’t afford that pickup truck and actually lots of people don’t think it’s cool anyway.

  88. 88.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Baud: If Mel Torme were alive he would reach down your throat and rip out your heart with his bare hands.

  90. 90.

    Matt McIrvin

    @Suzanne: It was just a few years ago that I remember conservatives gloating that they would inherit the Earth because liberals weren’t having babies (often they imagined that liberals were getting abortions all the time for kicks). Now… I suppose they imagine sinister conspiracies ruining it.

  92. 92.

    RaflW

    Goddamit. Some asshole Federal judge in FL just voided the mask mandate on planes. This country is run (or, at least part-run) by insane people. Fuck.

  93. 93.

    germy

    @RaflW:

    She  also believes paper money is unconstitutional.

     

    Mizelle takes an extreme approach to her originalist legal philosophy. In remarks to the Federalist Society, she discussed how she prepared for her clerkship with Justice Thomas, explaining, “by night I studied the original meaning of the constitution, like whether paper money is constitutional. It is not.”

  95. 95.

    Suzanne

    @Spanky: Oh, I agree. I don’t feel badly for them, really. I commented on a thread a few days ago about how I had read part of Michael Sandel’s book “The Tyranny of Merit”. And it’s a really interesting book and it has a lot of insight to offer to the current moment. But ultimately what conclusion I came to is that much of the white working class is really resentful that college-educated people, and women, and minorities, and gay people, etc…. are just doing better in life than they are, and they won’t be satisfied until they are doing better in life. And by “doing better”, I mean making more money.

    Sandel talks a lot about building a society of mutual and equal respect for one another, which I think we would all nodnodnod to. But it’s simply not going to happen that we’re all going to be economically on the same footing or that white men with less education are ever again going to make more bank than a woman with a degree. So where does that leave us? With a resentful cohort of whiny incel assholes. And ergo, I also come to the same FUCKEM conclusion.

  96. 96.

    Mike S (Now with a Democratic Congressperson!)

    @bluegirlfromwyo:  Has the NYT asked people in Ohio diners how they feel about Tucker’s movie yet

    @Suzanne:  I have heard that plumbers and electricians are raking in the cash.

  98. 98.

    West of the Rockies

    Hey, wingnuts, inject your junk with horse dewormer–it makes you super-duper manly!

  99. 99.

    Mike S (Now with a Democratic Congressperson!)

    @Baud: OK, I laughed our load or (LOLed if you are under xx years old.)

  100. 100.

    RaflW

    @Suzanne: This has been my central thesis about what has so totally warped Rod Dreher. He knows other people are enjoying sex, but he’s so bad at it that while he and his wife have managed to procreate, he knows he doesn’t satisfy his wife, and is probably so tormented by some unexamined fundy guilt (and, possibly, a hair trigger) that he doesn’t find sex to be a pleasure either.

    Ergo: No one should have sexy fun time. Especially two guys together (why that in particular is such a problem, I don’t want to even speculate. He should stay in his own terrible cishet misery club of one and not say another word in print. Eww.)

  102. 102.

    Anyway

    @Suzanne:

    But college degree is not a guarantor of anything. We hear about getting saddled with debt at a young age before beginning a career; degree-inflation means you don’t make much money starting out; young people live in parents basements etc etc.

    Young people don’t have it easy – what are these MAGAts so jealous of?

  104. 104.

    Suzanne

    @Matt McIrvin: I dated an airman for a short time before I met Mr. Suzanne. I went to a couple of functions at the AFB with him. I remember him speaking with great disdain about the “dependents”, aka some of his colleagues’ wives. Another friend of mine whose husband is in the Army talked to me about this, too, how a lot of the “military wives” are women who don’t have much education and don’t really have careers. And I guess it’s a big social divide and having a wife with an education and maybe a career is a big status symbol for some of these dudes. (Of course, having an independent career when your husband keeps getting sent all over the place is very difficult.)

    Anyway, the social conservatives still don’t think enough white babies are being born. But they are pissed AF that liberals are kicking their asses at it.

  107. 107.

    Dan B

    @CaseyL: I agree that Tuck may just be pandering to his base but it’s fascinating that he idolizes the hyper masculine rather than the Hemsworth, Ryan Reynolds, Chris Evans hunks who are so at ease with being thoughtful, funny, and empathetic.  Instead he goes for the Tom of Finland and gay Leather Daddy stereotype of masculinity.  They’re all going for hyper-dominant visions of manhood that are violent and often self destructive.  He seems to know he is not, and ne er has, or will be, an alpha male outside of his whining on TV.  In a crowd of hypermasculine men he would immediately be the butt of the joke.  He seems afraid of being teased as a wuss.

  108. 108.

    RaflW

    @germy: Oh my g-d, her lack of qualifications is stunning. Do businesses realize that by humping for Republicans, they’re helping install such utter legal morons that it’s a crapshoot how they might rule on cases they’re involved in?

    I’m sure the assumption is that, hey they’re conservative, it’s okay. But as Republicans start to threaten political retribution for biz’s that don’t toe the GOP line, these wildly reckless courts might just find whatever thinly disguised rationales they need to screw companies over. Brave new world we’re hurtling towards!

  109. 109.

    Suzanne

    @Anyway:

    But college degree is not a guarantor of anything. 

    Well, even with shit-tons of debt, it’s still generally a better financial decision than not (for most people). That’s not to say that going to college will ensure that you make lots of money, by no means. But still there is a significant gap in earning potential over a lifetime between college grads and non-college-grads.

    It’s also a status thing, and I think this is the most important part. Increasingly, college grads marry one another and concentrate their wealth. That used to not be the case. Even things like health and life expectancy and weight appear to correlate with having a degree.

  110. 110.

    debbie

    @Geminid:

    Letting you know the latest about JD Vance. Some people are unamused by Trump’s endorsement:

    Republican U.S. Senate candidate J.D. Vance got the announcement that most of his rivals had been seeking — an endorsement from former President Donald Trump. But some conservatives say they won’t vote for Vance and are now threatening they won’t back Trump either.

    The We the People Convention, a Tea Party group based in Portage County, had endorsed U.S. Senate candidate Mike Gibbons.

    Tom Zawistowski, the group’s president, said it appears Trump is listening to the same establishment advisors who staffed his administration with “RINOS” (Republicans In Name Only). Zawistowski said those same staffers undermined Trump’s presidency.

    Zawistowski noted nearly all of the Ohio Republican Party county chairmen signed a letter to Trump, asking him to not endorse Vance, a venture capitalist and the author of Hillbilly Elegy.

    The U.S. Senate candidate was once considered a “Never Trumper” and had said during the 2016 election that he “might have to hold his nose and vote for Hillary Clinton” instead of Trump. Zawistowski said Gibbons, an investment banker, is a true conservative.

    “Conservatives in Ohio do not accept this endorsement and will not vote for Vance,” Zawistowski said.

    Zawistowski says everyone he’s talked to in the past few days echoes that sentiment. He said Trump’s endorsement of Vance flies in the face of Ohioans who elected Trump.

    “Mr. President, you claim you won Ohio twice but let me be clear. You didn’t win Ohio. We the people worked our a—s off and elected you twice,” Zawistowski said.

    …

    Zawistowski said members of his group plan to voice their opposition at Trump’s planned rally in Delaware County Saturday.

    “President Trump needs us. We don’t need President Trump. We need conservative leadership and there are other voices out there that can provide that leadership,” Zawistowski says.

    Zawistowski suggested his group might instead back Florida Governor Ron DeSantis if he decided to take on Trump in a Republican primary for president in 2024

    (obviously, my bold)

  112. 112.

    Mike S (Now with a Democratic Congressperson!)

    @debbie: Yep, Drupf auditioned for the magats and won their endorsement, not the other way around. They wil absolutely turn on him if he strays from the magat line.

  114. 114.

    debbie

    Some of the replies might amuse the more juvenile among us.

    If you opened a testicle tanning salon, what would you name it?
    — Edwin (@edwinmundt) April 17, 2022

  119. 119.

    Ksmiami

    @bluegirlfromwyo: I say let them all injure themselves- I mean a Trump judge just announced that the CDC has no authority to limit the spread of disease… these people are beyond hope. Truly, may they all die painful long out deaths; our society will be much better off in the long run.

  122. 122.

    Suzanne

    @Ksmiami: Every time I think we’re reached Peak Stupid Shit, I’m proven totally fucken wrong. I mean, injecting bleach, eating horse paste and shitting oneself in the grocery store…. and that still wasn’t the pinnacle.

    Whatever. If this is what it means to be a coastal liberal elitist, I’m all in.

  123. 123.

    Origuy

    I’m wondering how this mask order will affect international flights. Foreign countries might say, “no mask, no land.” Judge Kimball may not care if Americans cannot fly out of the country, but airlines and their business customers may have other ideas. She should be put on the no-fly list herself.

  127. 127.

    Steve in the ATL

    I am in Panama City, Florida on business and OMG the humanity   I can’t even describe it.  I will need my memory erased after this

  128. 128.

    Mai Naem mobile

    I wonder if this has anything to do with the studies of men who have had COVID being more likely to have se×ual problems – there was the study of urologists finding the COVID virus in male genitalia months after having COVID. Also not being able to get it on as one could say.

  129. 129.

    wetzel

    A penis in time saves nine.

     

    Too many penises spoil the broth.

     

    A penis saved is a penis earned.

  130. 130.

    KenK

    Oh, this is such bullshit. I’ve been undergoing weekly UVB treatment for 11 years, and no signs of improved T-levels. All I have is a scorched scrotum to show for it…

  133. 133.

    Geminid

    @debbie: Interesting. This Saturday’s rally at the Delaware County Fairgrounds could be quite a show. I hope Vance gets booed.

    Trump already got Pennsylvania Republicans riled up over his endorsement of Dr. Oz, and the dynamic is similar to the one described in the story you excerpted. People want to blame Trump’s advisors for that one, but this Vance endorsement smells like a commercial transaction.

    And I don’t think any endorsement can get Ohioans to like J.D. Vance. The rest of the field isn’t much, but Vance and Mandel are two of the creepiest and most repulsive politicians around.

  135. 135.

    wetzel

    @germy:

    When I was three I had no sense

    I stuck my dick in an electric fence!!!!!

    I moved a little over and it burned my balls

    It made me mess my overalls!!!!!

  136. 136.

    Suzanne

    @RaflW:

    This has been my central thesis about what has so totally warped Rod Dreher. He knows other people are enjoying sex, but he’s so bad at it that while he and his wife have managed to procreate, he knows he doesn’t satisfy his wife, and is probably so tormented by some unexamined fundy guilt (and, possibly, a hair trigger) that he doesn’t find sex to be a pleasure either. 

    I also think that most of the crazy people of this type are secretly terrified that there isn’t a God. They really, really want there to be a God because they’re putting themselves through a lot of suffering and deprivation and weird guilt shit. And if there isn’t a God, then the joke is on them for inflicting that shit on themselves. They know that many of us laugh at them (because they’re stupid assholes shining lights on their balls) and the only thing that makes that bearable is the hope of a heavenly reward, or what non-Christians might call karma.

    Dreher is also one of those people who would be into Dungeons and Dragons if he wasn’t religious. There’s a type that needs that arcana, that convoluted rule structure. Things to memorize. Details and minute distinctions that they really want to matter.

    Nothing is pleasurable for these people, certainly not sex, but really not anything.

  138. 138.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @debbie: Gibbons is the most conventional R in the primary, no? And didn’t he recently endorse the Kinsleyan Gaffe that is Rick Scott’s economic platform?

    COLUMBUS — Mike Gibbons, a leading Republican Senate candidate from Ohio, said at a media event last fall that middle-class Americans don’t pay “any kind of a fair share” of income taxes.
    “The top 20% of earners in the United States pay 82% of federal income tax — and, if you do the math, and 45% to 50% don’t pay any income tax, you can see the middle class is not really paying any kind of a fair share, depending on how you want to define it,” Gibbons said.

  139. 139.

    Villago Delenda Est

    Geeze.  I never studied urology, but a female nurse friend informed me that she liked her men in briefs, not boxers, because it lowered fertility by scrunching up the scrotum and raising the heat of the testicles.  These dickweeds are just going fucking insane with this.  What is it like to walk around with sunburned balls, I wonder?  I’m not going to find out for myself, that’s for sure…

  141. 141.

    cain

     But there’s a possibility Carlson’s audience will roast their wedding tackle under a heat lamp, thus rendering themselves unable to reproduce and providing a long-term solution to our immediate fascism problem.

    Hope springs eternal. :-)

    They’ll still manage to blame Democrats and sue Nancy SMASH in some way. While Tucker’s balls stays clean and untanned.

  142. 142.

    Kathleen

    @debbie: Is DeWine still planning not to go do you know? I was a little suspicious about his latest positive CoVid test LOL.

    Do you mind sharing whom you are supporting in the primary (Whaley vs. Cranley)?

  145. 145.

    Geminid

    @debbie: I have this fantasy where Vance gets 18% on May 3rd, Timken gets 19%, Gibbons 20%, Mandel 21%, and Matt Dolan wins with 22%. This will never happen, and that’s probably a good thing for Tim Ryan.

  149. 149.

    Kathleen

    @Geminid: And that’s saying something considering Ohio’s Rethugs are an especially pernicious and toxic brand of vampires and ghouls.

  155. 155.

    debbie

    @Kathleen:

    Fran’s come down with COVID now. Like those two can’t spend one second apart!  ?

    DeWine was being very noncommittal about the rally. He has some sort of prior commitment and can’t promise he’ll be there. ??‍♀️

  156. 156.

    Geminid

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: State Senator Matt Dolan would be the conventional Republican in the race by the standards of ten years ago. Now he has the moderate conservative lane to himself and still seems to be running last.

    That Ohio party has gone off the deep end. Trump won the state by 8 points twice, and Republicans seem to think Ohio is now Arkansas.

  158. 158.

    Kathleen

    @debbie: Did it have something to do with the anniversary of Grant’s birth, or was that just a Twitter  meme, or is that an old guy’s version of “I need to stay home and wash my hair”?

  160. 160.

    wetzel

    Tuck’s Everlasting Penis Tanning Bed

     

    Tucker’s brown frankfurter

    Had flattened out to a hamburger

    He needed to tan it further

    So he built an ionic converter

    Into which to place his member

    A resonating chamber

    As brown as brown September

    In which to place his member

    The swirling radiation

    Was so damn satiating

    That now it’s brown like bacon

    And the skin has started flaking

  161. 161.

    Steeplejack

    I’ve been chuckling about “bromeopathic therapy” all day. I hear it in a Keanu Reeves stoner voice.

  162. 162.

    debbie

    @Geminid:

    I still don’t believe there will be a May 3 primary or even two separate primaries. The GOP has lost its grip on reality. Everyone’s trying to out-brinkmanship everybody else.

  164. 164.

    Geminid

    @debbie: I bet the TV and radio stations want to see a postponement. They’re making a lot of money on this primary. Their viewers and listeners probably wish it was over already.

  165. 165.

    Brachiator

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist:

    Mike Gibbons, a leading Republican Senate candidate from Ohio, said at a media event last fall that middle-class Americans don’t pay “any kind of a fair share” of income taxes.

    Interesting to see a Republican arguing out loud in favor of the rich.

  169. 169.

    Geminid

    @Brachiator: I read that Gibbons said this last fall on some Crain’s Business podcast. He probably thought he was speaking to a niche audience. But there’s no such thing now when you’re running for office.

  170. 170.

    Sister Machine Gun of Quiet Harmony

    @Suzanne:

    But ultimately what conclusion I came to is that much of the white working class is really resentful that college-educated people, and women, and minorities, and gay people, etc…. are just doing better in life than they are, and they won’t be satisfied until they are doing better in life. And by “doing better”, I mean making more money.

    I agree completely. Plus, they think we make all this money without doing ‘real’ work. As in, work that requires physical strength. The thing is that if they go into the trades, they start out making a lot more. Too many of them, though, are not responsible with that money. Without a consistent saving and a sound investment strategy, they will be in for a world of hurt later when their bodies wear out. Meanwhile, the college educated marry later, are more likely to invest for retirement, etc. They start out poor and do well later, right when the white working class are seeing their economic prospects shrink.

  171. 171.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    @Another Scott:

    our $80 million 3-year plan to save democracy from the ground up

    good to see somebody focusing on ground-up rather than the top-down solutions that have too often become the default in recent years

  173. 173.

    Ken

    @debbie: I still don’t believe there will be a May 3 primary or even two separate primaries. The GOP has lost its grip on reality.

    What are they going to have instead? Pistols at dawn? A steel cage death match? A replay of that scene in “The Dark Knight” where the Joker tells three thugs “I’ve only got one opening in my crew” and tosses a broken pool cue between them? A comparison of scrotal melanin content?

  174. 174.

    Suburban Mom

    Okay, since this is an open thread and the prior one is old, I’m delurking to point  out that state-level public school text requirements have a history as a source of shady dealing.  When a large system changes textbook requirements there are new deals to be cut, and money to be made.  I wouldn’t be one tiny bit surprised if the latest decision about Florida math texts turned out to be a way to suck up to Fox News and reward a few friendly producers of classroom materials.  Someone in Florida should keep an eye on who gets the contracts to supply the “acceptable” texts.

  177. 177.

    Kay

    @Suburban Mom:

    Thanks. The Indiana “ban CRT” bill went down because they were afraid of not qualifying for AP courses.

    The wrath of the AP parents – sent those Republicans scurrying away :)

  179. 179.

    Danielx

    The jokes, they write themselves…

    Although I will bet that right now somebody somewhere is filing a patent application for a Tucker-endorsed tanning light.

  181. 181.

    Danielx

    @Ken:

    A biting-off-live-bat-heads competition, per Ozzy, followed by all the R candidates being thrown into a pit of rabid wolverines. First to emerge alive wins.

  182. 182.

    RepubAnon

    @Roger Moore:  Precisely!  I can have my pay electronically deposited into my bank account, and pay for things electronically with a credit card.  I pay fees for this, and get the protection of rules such as being able to dispute inaccurate charges.  (Debit cards don’t have this protection – which is why I use credit cards.)

    The only advantage I see to cryptocurrencies other than the speculation bubbles is that it’s easier for my money to be stolen.

  185. 185.

    Suburban Mom

    @Kay: I’ve met those parents and they are scary.  Don’t ever get between the kid they consider to be Ivy or near Ivy bound and the last available seat in AP Physics.

  186. 186.

    laura

    @Dan B: my wag is that he’s a deeply closeted homosexual who’s sexual awakening in the Bay Area came at a time when Tom of Finland was errrrwhere- the actual ToF art material, the leather daddies in the Castro, the BAR, the whole scene and it’s both his imprint and deepest source of shame and uh oh feelings in the no no spot. His public facing persona is such an unfuckable square from the land of William F Buckley and his barely contained hysteria on the “rare occasions” that he turns to the subject of manliness just makes one wonder about his choices, his motivation and why, at the dimming of the day, he is such vile filth. If I’m off track, please steer me straight, constructive criticism is my jam!

  187. 187.

    TonyG

    There’s really nothing more MANLY than obediently doing whatever some dweeb on teevee tells you to do.  Obey your teevee!

  189. 189.

    Spanky

    @Baud: Exactly! Bookmark this as another example of Hogan’s “moderate” cred being the result of the MD legislature, and absolutely not his governing philosophy.

  191. 191.

    Ruckus ??

    @Suzanne:

    Well they only know one direction and that’s always the most stupid, because it doesn’t help anyone. Even the rich assholes who are stealing everything not tied down and some that is.

  192. 192.

    Bupalos

    @Suzanne: Hate to be the bearer of this news, but fascism isn’t actually genetically determined. And it flourishes best in societies that do this Us/Them thing.

  194. 194.

    Dan B

    @Jim, Foolish Literalist: His story begs several questions.

    Why would anyone grope him?  It would be like squeezing Wonder Bread. (Apologies to Wonder Bread.)

    Does he believe his ‘manly allure’ would make the gehz swoon?

    Would he ever go into a public restroom?  He seems like the fussy type who would hold it until he got to a first class hotel.

    Would he go to a public park?  Private clubs at private golf courses seem his modality.

    Everything screams prissy wimp.  (Emphasis on ‘screams’.)

  195. 195.

    Bupalos

    @Mike S (Now with a Democratic Congressperson!): yes agreed, this is true.   I don’t really know about this whole taxonomy of the right wing male.

    Its culture folks. The wingers who can stay off drugs out in exurbia make decent money and pair up with traditionalist women just fine. Frankly some tech school kid that goes right into a trade might be (strictly and myopically speaking) be  making a better financial choice than a lot of college kids.

    There are other reason why these are less likely to he happy marriages or happy people.

  196. 196.

    Bupalos

    @Mike S (Now with a Democratic Congressperson!): i’m not sure there is any “line.” More like just a demand to reflect their anger and bitterness. As long as Trump calls people names, refuses to respect anything decent, and generally affirms and projects the idea that all of morality is a scam and that nothing is true… well he’s golden. For a broad majority if his “supporters” that’s what matters. And there is basically zero chance he could ever stop doing any of thoae things because those aren’t thimgs he’s faking, that’s who he is.

  198. 198.

    Mai Naem mobile

    @Suburban Mom: i wonder if Rupert Murdoch is involved in text book publishing. I only know he’s involved in regulat book publishing. I remember from years ago that Texas was a big influence in school text books chosen. I’ve never understood why California wasn’t mentioned since its a larger state. I am guessing Florida has a big influence now as well with their increase in population.

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