I am in a shitty little microtel that is under construction somewhere in the middle of nowhere and I really mean that. Yesterday I drove to charlotte, stayed the night, then this morning got up and dropped off a car full of stuff at my parents winter rental at Isle of Palms, SC, took 15 minutes to help Devon get it in the house (teamwork makes the dream work), high-fived her and turned around and drove back. I made it all but about three hours and said enough.
Nothing of note to report, although I did have an amusing interaction at a Starbucks somewhere in South Carolina. I ordered a latte, and tried to hand them a tip and they presented a tip jar and I had to decide who got the tip, and it was marked up as “Frosty the Snowman” or “Jack Frost.” And because I have no internal monologue I just blurted out “Frost the Snowman of course he was a jolly happy soul fuck Jack Frost nipping at your nose the bastard” and dropped it in the right slot and watched the poor girl mouth “wow” as I drove off.
Everything is fine.
Baud
Jack Frost is probably the name of the owner.
zzyzx
I admit I’m looking forward to Musk suddenly having to familiarize himself with Germany’s anti hate speech laws. This might get interesting.
middlelee
Thanks for a good laugh.
C Nelson Reilly
Frosty was a socialist
satby
@middlelee: RIGHT??
Never change John!
Steeplejack
I like road trips. I haven’t taken one in a while.
By coincidence, today I took the doughty Kia in for its annual state inspection and made an appointment next Tuesday for its annual service. I also want them to check out a vibration and slight noise from the left front tire area. I wonder whether it could be the bearings. I’ve had this for about two months and have been slightly reluctant to go anywhere beyond local driving. It would be nice to take a long day trip somewhere or go to Rehoboth Beach for a few days.
The K-Whip is a 2009 Rondo with only about 70,000 miles on it. It runs very well, and it’s worth it to keep it in top condition. I want my (hypothetical) next vehicle to be an electric car or a hovercraft, whichever comes first.
Ken
That sounds like the setup for a version of “The Man Who Knew Too Much”, where your babble accidentally matches a countersign and the barista hands you an envelope with fifty thousand dollars and the missing classified materials from the Mar-a-Lago file folders.
HeleninEire
@middlelee: Swear to God. I laughed out loud.
la caterina
@satby: RIGHT!! Over the years here I’ve discovered a funny Cole story to be more therapeutic than any anti-anxiety medication Pharma has on offer. Thanks, Cole!
Raoul Paste
Best thing I have read all day
Baud
I just watched Elvis, so a “snowman” brings up a different image in my mind.
Edmund Dantes
LMAO. Wish I could have been in line to see and hear it.
Classic
geg6
Never change, Cole.
Gin & Tonic
Dude rides a bicycle across a tennis net. Really.
JCJ
@HeleninEire: Not only did I laugh out loud, I then read it to my wife and daughter who also laughed out loud. They also agreed with the sentiment.
satby
For more amusement, I present this whole Jack E. Smith Twitter AMA
(Parody account)
Amir Khalid
@zzyzx:
Elon will decide a German law against hate speech doesn’t apply to American free-speech absolutist him. He will get into a fight with the German Government over this, and eventually lose. That is something to look forwaed to.
zzyzx
@Amir Khalid: much to my surprise, the post was deleted by Twitter for violating rules.
Lyrebird
@la caterina: I can believe it!
Thanks JC!
RaflW
Cleaning, packing, putting up kayaks and shit, and driving 5 hours in our trusty but rattly 2000 Corolla today means this is my first peek at this high quality website today. Hello, all!
Has the demand letter to Melon Tusk on behalf of thousands of laid off employees made the rounds here yet? It’s sooo delightful. (I didn’t find a news story about it, so sadly have to link to a tweet.)
mrmoshpotato
Cole. Bringing Christmas cheer both far and near!
BlueGuitarist
@Ken: lol
BlueGuitarist
@RaflW:
Very interesting
Lyrebird
But that is perfect. The lawyer who wrote the letter had some fun, and using Twitter to share the demand letter around the world is the icing on top.
HumboldtBlue
As for dads, I just had a good 35 minute convo with my pop who remains in hospital but who sounds a million times better than last week and who feels a million times better as well, so that’s encouraging. Now he just wants to get the hell out of the hospital, as it’s driving him batty, but he may have to endure another day or two until oxygen levels get better.
If you need something to read, here’s a piece by AB Stoddard about Trump and the GOP and how they are fucked because they rode that Trump train, and now he’s willing to drive it not just off the tracks but over the cliffs and into the sea if needed.
mrmoshpotato
@HumboldtBlue: Good to hear your dad’s feeling better. Hope he has a full recovery.
HumboldtBlue
@mrmoshpotato:
Thanks, it was good to hear him.
Anoniminous
Nothing in South Carolina is in the middle of nowhere.
Ruckus
@Anoniminous:
I was stationed at Charleston SC – 50 + yrs ago.
There indeed is middle of no where in SC. Doesn’t look like that though.
And driving down some of the back roads was actually breath taking. Once driving along a road which was cut out of the whatever they are trees like a tunnel I saw a truck with huge circular blade saws mounted on a bar which was shaped the same as the tree tunnels. It drove down the road and trimmed everything from about 4 ft up, around and over, both sides of the road, all at one time. Amazing looking. Also just a tad dangerous.
AJ of the Mustard Search and Rescue Team
Where else in all the internet can you get this exquisite content?
Where, I ask you?
NOWHERE!
ColoradoGuy
Elmo is about to discover that California labor law doesn’t f*** around. The state has sued mega-companies before and taken them to the cleaners. (I was part of a class-action case where California sued CBS and won.)
Likewise, the Germans don’t f*** around with Nazi imagery, pro-Nazi talk, or Holocaust denialism. They are flat-out illegal in Germany and carry prison terms. If he’s not careful, he could end up with an Interpol arrest warrant.
lurker
@HumboldtBlue: very glad to hear the good news … keep on keeping on, enjoy a break in the rain when you get a chance, and if I were you be thankful for a little more time with dad … there are typically worse things in life.
lowtechcyclist
@Ruckus:
I was in grad school there ~30 years ago, at USC in Columbia. My fiancee had an instructorship at Georgia Southern for a year, and I can attest that the drive from Columbia, SC to Statesboro, GA takes one through the middle of nowhere.
But since Cole said he stopped when he was about 3 hours from home, I expect his ‘middle of nowhere’ was in WV or possibly VA somewhere, depending on his route.
Ohio Mom
@RaflW: Lots of people who have no contact with attorneys think legal writing is a mishmash of stuffy boilerplate (“Enclosed please find”) sprinkled with Whereas and Heretofore, but one thing I learned from my otherwise turkey of a FIL (now gone twenty years) is that lawyers can have a lot of fun with their correspondence.
You just know drafting that letter was a highlight of that attorney’s day.
Nukular Biskits
John Cole is my role model.
BruceFromOhio
The world needs you to get out more often.
The Moar You Know
As a former Starbucks employee, let me just reassure you that this will not even be in the top 10 of “weirdo customers” that she deals with during the course of her shift.