I’m 53. Whatever.
For my birthday, I asked the twittersphere for a favor:
It’s my birthday and I am 53, and for my birthday I would like you to please reply to this with pictures of your pets in costumes or party hats.
Pretty please.
— John Cole (@Johngcole) June 22, 2023
If you click on the link you are going to get hundreds of pets in hats and costumes. Their gift to me is my gift to you!
Still waiting on my fucking check from Soros, though.
Baud
Happy birthday, man. Glad to see you so happy these days
eclare
Happy birthday!
cain
Happy Birthday, young man! (you’re a year younger than me) – You have the “Herbie” number – 53! Ocho! :)
Also, asking for ‘pets in hats’ literally guarantees people going to a stable diffusion website and generating cats with hats ;)
Sorryforlaughing
Happy birthday!
TheronWare
Happy birthday 🎂!
FelonyGovt
Happy birthday!
Aren’t we all.
WaterGirl
That is the best idea. Ever.
Steeplejack
Happy birthday, Cole! 🥳 🎈 🎉 🎊 🎂
WaterGirl
@Sorryforlaughing: First rule of Balloon Juice:
Never be sorry for laughing!
Tom Levenson
Happiest of days, youngster!
mrmoshpotato
Obligatory
Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)
Happy Birthday! 🎂 🎉🎈🎊
satby
Looked and looked, but I don’t have any of my herd, past or present, in costume. So I just said Happy Birthday, and repeat the best wishes for an awesome coming year here.
J R in WV
Happy birthday, J G Cole, and congratulations on everything!
JPL
Little Finch says Happy Birthday, but I don’t wear hats.
trollhattan
Woo-hoo, enjoy! They’re a precious commodity, these orbits.
🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈
Jay
Happy Birthday John.
This place has been your gift to us.
SiubhanDuinne
I can hardly get pictures at all, so far, of the three feral cats that come around, let alone get close enough to put hats and costumes on them, but they all (Greymalkin, Hoover, and Hoover’s Kitten) wish you the happiest of birthdays!
CaseyL
🎂 ❤️🎉 Happy Birthday! 🎂 ❤️🎉
Geminid
Happy birthday!
Since 53 is a prime number, if anyone asks your age you can answer, “Let’s just say I’m in my prime.”
BeautifulPlumage
Happy Birthday! So glad you’ve found Joelle and can be on vacay with her during your BD. You sound much happier. Have a great one!
chrisanthemama
I’m not on the fcking Twitter-machine, and I don’t have a pet, but please enjoy these photos of snakes-with-hats. Oh, and HBD, Cole. SnakesWithHats – Serpentine millinery (reddit.com)
zhena gogolia
Happy birthday! Can’t think of anything original to say.
Joy in FL
Happy birthday, John. My cats also wish you happy birthday : )
Noskilz
Happy Birthday!
Alison Rose
Happy birthday, friend. My cat won’t let me put a stitch of fabric or anything else on her, but here’s a semi-decent AI drawing of Jerry Garcia in a birthday hat.
Convert to Judaism, it’ll come faster.
Omnes Omnibus
Happy birthday and thanks for providing this place.
BeautifulPlumage
Sooo many cute pics on your Twitter! Is Mike in Oly really good at Photoshop or are his cats really that cool?
misterpuff
Happy Birthday, Dude!
This is my favorite place.
Baud
@Alison Rose:
Y’all got that space laser network.
Alison Rose
@Baud: Yeah, so watch it. After centuries upon centuries of ill treatment, we ain’t afraid to use it.
OzarkHillbilly
Well done, John. May you have many more.
James E Powell
Happy Birthday! It’s a cliche, but true, you are 53 years young. Many happy years ahead.
Ohio Mom
Happy birthday and all the best in the coming year!
Anne Laurie
Many happy returns, Cole, and regards to Joelle for helping make this a happy birthday for you!
Subcommandante Yakbreath
Happy Birthday! My cat gang sends their very best wishes, though no pictures.
becca
Happy Birfday! I would send in a pic of my recently adopted Sadie, but she would eat anything I could manage to get on her before I could snap it. We’re going through the “everything is food or a toy” stage right now. It’s a stage, isn’t it? Please tell me it’s a stage.
Maxim
Happy birthday, John! This site is also your gift to us, every day. I hope your next trip around the sun brings you many good things.
Ivan X
I’m 53 too. I think Soros came through for me, but I can’t be sure because it was a black copter, pizza joint, possibly deep state operation. I did get the payoff in the end — I was hoping for cash, but it was a crypto wallet that I tried to cash out but Biden’s SEC is blocking all the fiat off-ramps. Still, I got mine. Maybe I had a leg up on Cole because I’m Jewish.
ETA: @Alison Rose got to the Jew joke first!
delphinium
Happy Birthday-may this year bring you much deserved joy!
Ruckus
John, Happy Birthday! Did you call your parents and thank them?
Still waiting on my fucking check from Soros, though.
I wouldn’t hold my breath.
It was lost in the mail.
The dog ate it.
A billionaire is going to write you a check…. His secretary cashed it at the local liquor store and laughed all the way to the bank at how few zeros it had.
zzyzx
I just have cats. They never let me put anything on them.
Mike in NC
Happy birthday! Mine is tomorrow. Shrimp tacos!
Sure Lurkalot
No pets but I’ll tilt my evening beer in a toast with fine words and gestures! Happy birthday!
terraformer
happy birthday, sir!
and may this place you’ve created that helped keep me sane in the aughts and since, may it also reach others and help keep them sane as well, forevermore
prostratedragon
Happy Birthday, kiddo! (There are people my age with 53-year-old offspring.) Since mrmoshpotato got there first with the Beatles, have a nice end-of-the-world singalong.
mvr
Happy Birthday John Cole! 53 means you were a young man when you created this Den of Jackals.
Meyerman
Happy Birthday, Cole! Would you just stop trying to make us happy while pretending to hate us all? The cognitive dissonance is exhausting. But seriously, many, many happy returns of the day!
JMG
Happy Birthday! Mine’s next week, I’m a little older than you, if we define “little” in terms of decades.
bbleh
Still waiting on my fucking check from Soros, though.
Oh that’s just what they tell you to say.
Happy birthday! Don’t spend it all in one place.
Redshift
Happy Birthday, John!
I missed your request on Twitter, but it doesn’t matter because if I put a hat on Joe the Bunny, there’s no way it would stay there long enough to get a photo.
Sparkedcat
Happy Birthday young man! My Soros check was sent to a Nigerian Prince by mistake. All I have to do is send $450.00 and the funds will be released immediately.
geg6
Happy birthday, John. Good wishes to you from Lovey, Koda and Cleo. None of whom will tolerate a hat.
Jackie
Happy Birthday, John! I don’t follow Twitter, but did you fulfill your birthday wish with pics of Steve, Max and Thurston bedecked?
Sebastian
Happy Birthday, John! All the best wishes!
Betty
Happy birthday, John. Best wishes for many happy years ahead!
Almost Retired
Happy Happy Birthday! I am temporarily petless, so I asked my oldest son to contribute a photo of the beloved Grand-dog, a quirky and loveable pit bull mix who is somewhere on the spectrum and loves wearing the many different colorful pajamas my wife buys for her (we’re a bit overdue for grandchildren). My son refused. “I am not giving you a photo for you to share with your creepy old imaginary internet friends.” So offensive. You all are not imaginary.
Alison Rose
@Ivan X: I’m quick on the draw when it comes to Heeb humor.
devore
Happy Birthday
🎂
lowtechcyclist
@Geminid:
It is a prime, but there are lots of those. (Infinitely many, of course.) I think of it more as a full deck + a joker.
Happy birthday, John, however you want to look at it, and I’m glad you get to celebrate it this year with someone special!
Sister Golden Bear
Happy birthday!
Msilaneous
Happy birthday!
Ivan X
@Alison Rose: I’ve noticed. It’s one of your superior traits.
kalakal
Happy birthday. No pets in hats ( the cats would kill me) but here’s a cute little doggo who believes every meal should be a party and brings some friends along*
Lunon
*At first I thought he must be lonely but there is another dog in the video
Ben Cisco 🇺🇸🎖️🖥️♦️
@Baud: HBD, young sir.
Wishing you all the best!
Alison Rose
@Ivan X: If only it earned a paycheck!
MazeDancer
Happy Birthday, John!
My pantherinni kitty Kai is among your hat wearers. Great idea and much fun for all. Pretty sure you get a b-day wish come true for every participating pet.
grandmaBear
@Almost Retired: I’m imaginary.
Denali5
Happy Birthday, John! You’re the best!
whatsleft
Happy Birthday JC! Thank you for making this jackal hangout come into being 🥰. And thanks to all those who are keeping it a top 10000 blog!
NJ Henderson
Happy birthday, John. I’ve been coming here for years and years, although I rarely post. Best wishes for everything ahead!
Rileys Enabler
Happy birthday! Riley won’t wear hats or outfits of any kind- ever- but she hopes you have a wonderful day all the same!
dww44
Happy Birthday, John. You are just a young thing. Here’s to many more birthdays and wedding anniversaries to celebrate!
kindness
The animal pics people tweeted back to John are awesome.
Happy Birthday Big Boy. Soon to be less big.
Joelle
Happy Purrrrthday My Love. I’m so happy I got to share it with you. Thank you for another purrrfect day. XXOO – Joelle
Mai Naem mobileI
Happy Birthday John. Hope you’re having a wonderful day. On Soros, you have to be asking the son Alex. George has retired so maybe you’ve been sending your demands to the wrong Soros.
A woman from anywhere (formerly Mohagan)
Happy Birthday John! And thanks for Balloon Juice, blogfather :-)
Lyrebird
@J R in WV: Rooting for you through this rough time healthwise!
And many happy returns JC!
SFBayAreaGal
Happy birthday John. I hope your day was full of love, laughter and fun.
Zelma
So young! Happy birthday. I have pictures of Bandit in costumes but no ability to post them. That’s what comes of being really old. Thank you for Balloon Juice.
MMM
Damn. You’re old. Rolly says come visit me again. We’ll always have #1.
Paul in KY
Most Happy Birthday, John. Have mine coming up at end of month.
Manyakitty
Happiest of birthdays to you! Hope it’s the best one yet!
Gregory
Happy birthday!