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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Late Night Open Thread

Late Night Open Thread

by John Cole|  October 29, 202311:26 pm| 72 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

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This was pretty damned genius:

Got a couple hearty laughs out of it.

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Previous Post: « Sunday Night Open Thread
Next Post: Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread: Dean Phillips Not Winning Over Democratic Hearts »

Reader Interactions

72Comments

  1. 1.

    Alison Rose

    October 29, 2023 at 11:31 pm

    “And what will 1,000 pounds be called, sir?”

    “Nothing.”

    I LOL’d.

  2. 2.

    SiubhanDuinne

    October 29, 2023 at 11:35 pm

    Oh, that’s brilliant. I’m literally weeping with mirth. Now I have to go watch it again.

  3. 3.

    Alison Rose

    October 29, 2023 at 11:39 pm

    The thing about taking the u out of (most) words cracked me up, too. Also reminded me of one of my favorite tweet-meme jokes.

    Tweet:

    Why is it “cancelled” in the UK but “canceled” in America?

    Reply:

    Cuz we gave you that L in 1776.

  4. 4.

    way2blue

    October 29, 2023 at 11:45 pm

    @Alison Rose:   Ah.  Good one.

  5. 5.

    WaterGirl

    October 29, 2023 at 11:46 pm

    I think that’s the funniest thing I have seen in quite awhile.

  6. 6.

    Memory Pallas

    October 29, 2023 at 11:46 pm

    “Glamor” just does not look glamorous .

  7. 7.

    mrmoshpotato

    October 29, 2023 at 11:47 pm

    I was hoping for another David Pumpkins skit last night.

  8. 8.

    gene108

    October 29, 2023 at 11:48 pm

    It is true. We do not switch to the metric system because we still have the freedom to be free.

    We will resist French Imperial hegemony in weights and measures for as long as it takes for the world to demand the same FREEDOM!!!

  9. 9.

    SiubhanDuinne

    October 29, 2023 at 11:49 pm

    I’ve now watched it three times in a row and I’m still shrieking with laughter. Jesus, that’s a funny bit.

  10. 10.

    eclare

    October 29, 2023 at 11:51 pm

    We had to learn a song about the immiment metric adoption in third grade.  I still remember some of the lyrics.  Talk about useless information stored deep in my brain.  They are next to the song lyrics I remember from a song celebrating Johnny Appleseed.

  11. 11.

    WaterGirl

    October 29, 2023 at 11:52 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne:  How’s the recovery going?

    When I typed “how” it came out “ow”, which I thought was fitting for my question!

  12. 12.

    WaterGirl

    October 29, 2023 at 11:52 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: You could see that “Washington” nearly burst out laughing at one part, but he managed to contain himself and not break character.

  13. 13.

    WaterGirl

    October 29, 2023 at 11:53 pm

    @SiubhanDuinne: And the one fellow was so very earnest.

  14. 14.

    Eric K

    October 29, 2023 at 11:55 pm

    Just started watching last nights show (on this skit now) so far they are batting 1.000, best SNL episode in years

  15. 15.

    dmsilev

    October 29, 2023 at 11:59 pm

    At least he didn’t try to explain clothing and shoe sizes.

  16. 16.

    SiubhanDuinne

    October 30, 2023 at 12:00 am

    @WaterGirl:

    Thanks for asking, WG. Almost all of the bruising has faded, and the cut over the eye is healing nicely. Forehead still has a couple of lumps that are tender to the touch, but all in all it could have been much worse. I haven’t even taken an Aleve since Wednesday.

  17. 17.

    SiubhanDuinne

    October 30, 2023 at 12:03 am

    @WaterGirl:

    Yes, that impressed me as well. Excellent self-control. He must have some kind of mind trick he uses to keep from corpsing.

  18. 18.

    WaterGirl

    October 30, 2023 at 12:04 am

    @SiubhanDuinne: Always a turning point when you realize you forgot to take your meds!  :-)

    Glad to hear it’s going so well.  You’ve been quiet her lately so I have been wondering.

  19. 19.

    BellyCat

    October 30, 2023 at 12:05 am

    the bit about “And all men will be free!” from the AA cast member. “You asked me about temperature.” With the response, “I did not!”

    Dying here…

  20. 20.

    mrmoshpotato

    October 30, 2023 at 12:16 am

    🎶Shake your ass on the Lake Beach🎶

  21. 21.

    Seanly

    October 30, 2023 at 12:18 am

    For the record, 1000 pounds is a kip. Well, 1000 pounds-force, mostly used by structural engineers like myself.

  22. 22.

    mvr

    October 30, 2023 at 12:20 am

    @BellyCat: Dying in more ways than one.

  23. 23.

    SiubhanDuinne

    October 30, 2023 at 12:21 am

    @WaterGirl:

    “So in football … there is no kicking?”

    [beat]

    “There’s a little kicking.”

    LOL

  24. 24.

    mrmoshpotato

    October 30, 2023 at 12:22 am

    @Seanly: Full service blog!

  25. 25.

    mrmoshpotato

    October 30, 2023 at 12:24 am

    Lake Beach skit

  26. 26.

    JaySinWA

    October 30, 2023 at 12:28 am

    @Seanly: I thought it was the half-ton as in half-ton pickup.

  27. 27.

    eclare

    October 30, 2023 at 12:28 am

    @mrmoshpotato:

    OMG that was hilarious!

  28. 28.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 12:30 am

    For what it’s worth, right now the Tory government in the UK is making a big pointless noise about bringing back Imperial weights and measures, because tradition, and did those feet in ancient times walk upon England’s mountains green, or something.

    (And when Americans comment on this, most of them don’t realize that we *don’t* use Imperial measures–our fluid volume units have the same names as the Imperial ones but they’re all different! Whoopee, fun times!)

  29. 29.

    Rose Weiss

    October 30, 2023 at 12:33 am

    Thanks for the biggest laugh I’ve had in a long time! That skit was hilarious. I loved the Black guy prominently  continuing to ask and being essentially ignored. So on point.

  30. 30.

    catbirdman

    October 30, 2023 at 12:38 am

    I can’t believe nobody’s mentioned Lake Beach yet — funniest thing I’ve seen on SNL since the Glory Days!

  31. 31.

    Yutsano

    October 30, 2023 at 12:45 am

    @Matt McIrvin: ​And for the love of Pete do not tell ANYONE that our Imperial system is actually based on metric units and has been since *checks notes*1893.

  32. 32.

    HumboldtBlue

    October 30, 2023 at 12:49 am

    That was hilarious.

  33. 33.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    October 30, 2023 at 12:57 am

    @gene108:

    After reading people in metric countries complaining about price increases at the gas pump, be happy we have not converted to the metric system. A per unit price change of .20 cents is only a $3.40 increase for 17 gallons. It’s $12.85 for the same amount of fuel in liters with that same .20 cent increase.

    The oil companies would love that to no end.

  34. 34.

    frosty

    October 30, 2023 at 1:00 am

    @mrmoshpotato: ​
     Good one!!

  35. 35.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 1:04 am

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: Aren’t the prices far higher in those countries because they have high gasoline taxes, not because they use metric?

  36. 36.

    mvr

    October 30, 2023 at 1:06 am

    @Matt McIrvin:

    As they should.

  37. 37.

    Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)

    October 30, 2023 at 1:13 am

    @Matt McIrvin:

    For what it’s worth, right now the Tory government in the UK is making a big pointless noise about bringing back Imperial weights and measures, because tradition, and did those feet in ancient times walk upon England’s mountains green, or something.

    The UK Tories have their finger on the pulse of the real issues people care about, just like the GOP /s

    I always like metric measurements. Way easier to convert than imperial and it’s more intuitive

  38. 38.

    Sandia Blanca

    October 30, 2023 at 1:18 am

    @mrmoshpotato: Yes, I kept hoping Tom Hanks would jump out and yell “Any questions?”

  39. 39.

    Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)

    October 30, 2023 at 1:18 am

    @gene108:

    I want my Freedom Fries!

  40. 40.

    Splitting Image

    October 30, 2023 at 1:19 am

    @Memory Pallas:

    “Glamor” just does not look glamorous .

    One of my favourite little bits of word trivia is that the word glamour is derived from grammar. The fact that glamour and glamor still rhyme with grammar regardless of how they are spelled (spelt?) is one of the fun little things about English that makes it so enjoyable for non-speakers to learn.

    I also love that words like row and bow rhyme in two different ways. It’s cute that anybody thought they could make English spelling seem rational by removing the “u” from a few words.

  41. 41.

    Ken

    October 30, 2023 at 1:21 am

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: Brilliant! Who are you parodying?

    (At least, I assume it’s a parody. “20 cents per unit” is obviously going to depend on the unit, and a 20 cents per gallon change would be a nickel a gallon change in a country using metric units. And dollars, but I understand there are a number of dollarized countries.)

  42. 42.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 1:29 am

    @Ken: I thought the reasoning was that using smaller units would make it easier for oil companies to hide a price hike because it would seem smaller in per-unit terms. In which case we should measure gasoline by dekaliters, obviously.

  43. 43.

    Balconesfault

    October 30, 2023 at 1:34 am

    @Eric K: The cold opening was f***ing horrible.   First because the ageism thing about Biden is so deadly stale writers should be openly mocked for resorting to it … secondly because Christopher Walkens talent was completely wasted … third because Mikey Day’s impression of Biden completely misses the mark to a degree it makes one wonder if he’s actually watched Biden talk, or just watched other comics doing their own parodies of Biden.

  44. 44.

    Villago Delenda Est

    October 30, 2023 at 1:35 am

    Here’s the despicable part: the military uses the metric system.

  45. 45.

    Goku (aka Amerikan Baka)

    October 30, 2023 at 1:40 am

    @Matt McIrvin:

    OT, but sorry if I was obnoxious or anything earlier today on the morning thread

  46. 46.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 1:49 am

    @Goku (aka Amerikan Baka): No problem, I don’t entirely remember what that was about.

  47. 47.

    StringOnAStick

    October 30, 2023 at 2:01 am

    It pains me that so much of my physics and chemistry education/testing was just unit conversion brain teasers, just so we could avoid going metric.  Canada decided to convert at the same time we were going to; we bailed out and they went ahead and did it.  Smart move.  I

    That sketch was brilliant.

  48. 48.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 2:15 am

    @StringOnAStick: My physics and chemistry education was pretty much all in metric. One exception was that the physics department machine shop still used US units, as I recall, because that was what the machine tools were calibrated in.

  49. 49.

    StringOnAStick

    October 30, 2023 at 2:24 am

    @Matt McIrvin: My first undergraduate physics prof made sure every exam was a garden of unit conversion delights.  We were allowed to have one 5×7 index card with unit conversion factors for each exam. What a fecking waste of time and effort.

  50. 50.

    wjca

    October 30, 2023 at 2:26 am

    @StringOnAStick: Canada decided to convert at the same time we were going to; we bailed out and they went ahead and did it.

    My suspicion is that we’re going to sneak over to it.  So gradually, and quietly, that the xenophobes and reactionaries don’t even notice.  Already in progress.

    Consider, for example, that the drinks you pick up at the grocery are all sold in (usually half) liter bottles.  Auto mechanics still need SAE wrenches and stuff for older cars.  But new cars?  Metric everywhere you look.  (And, for all us elitists, science and engineering courses routinely do things in metric.  Have for years.)  I’d guess that pretty much the last to go will be speed limits and highway mileage signs.  Just because even the densest will notice that.  But by then, it will be all over but the (impotent) shouting.

  51. 51.

    FastEdD

    October 30, 2023 at 2:47 am

    It’s like when I hit the wrong button on some sub-menu in the car. I look down and OMG I”M GOING 100!!

    That’s kilometers per hour dumbass. You’re going 62 mph. Nevermind.

  52. 52.

    opiejeanne

    October 30, 2023 at 3:07 am

    @wjca: I remember when the bigger soda bottles were switched from half gallons to 2 liters, and there was an ad campaign to let us know that we would actually get a little more soda for the same price. I just nodded my head and gave my kids some cold tapwater when they complained that they were thirsty, because I’m that kind of monster.

  53. 53.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    October 30, 2023 at 3:11 am

    @Matt McIrvin:

    Yes, but daily price changes are a huge complaint in Australia, for example. High prices are bad enough but daily swings in the per unit price (.10-.20 cents a liter) makes it worse. Fuel price swings are a huge issue for a lot of people in these countries.

    Would you rather pay .20 cents more per unit for 17 units or 64 units? Change to metric here and we get to feel their agony with every price change.

  54. 54.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    October 30, 2023 at 3:21 am

    @Ken:

    No parody. For example, in Australia there are daily price swings in some places that are quite large. The reason I am saying “unit” is that our units are gallons and theirs are liters. A 17 gallon fill here is a 64 liter fill there. If our price goes up .20 cents a gallon our increase is $3.40 at the pump for a 17 gallon fill. If their price goes up .20 cents a liter, the increase at the pump for them is almost $13.00 for that fill.

    I’m not talking about the cost of gas between our countries, just the effect of a small change in the price per unit and that there are fewer gallon units than liter units in a fill.

  55. 55.

    ColoradoGuy

    October 30, 2023 at 3:46 am

    It wasn’t until I went to a British school in Hong Kong (in the Sixties) that I realized Americans used a greatly simplified version of British Imperial units. I had to memorize medieval units like Rods, Chains, Furlongs, and weirdest of all, Stones, which are only used to weigh people. WTF? And a unit of time I’d never heard before, a “Fortnight” (14 days).

    Even stranger, Hong Kong used HK Dollars as a currency (100 cents to the dollar), while the UK-sourced math lessons were in the perverted Pounds/Shillings/Pence units, with Guineas (21 shillings) thrown in just for the added kink factor. I was baffled how the residents of the Isles weren’t driven completely insane by all this archaic medievalism in the simplest of daily transactions.

  56. 56.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 4:35 am

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: Yes, but why do you think the price swing per unit is the thing that would remain constant if one changes the unit system? Is there a mechanism that would determine that? Is it just because of a comparison between the US and Australia? If they measured in milliliters would the price swings be 1000 times as large?

  57. 57.

    Ruckus

    October 30, 2023 at 4:56 am

    On my front page I have a speech from Volodymyr Zelenskyy.

    The post shows me a different Y Tube. Definitely not Zelenskyy.

    I watched the one on the front page first and it didn’t seem to be as funny as the one up top……

  58. 58.

    Ruckus

    October 30, 2023 at 5:05 am

    OK I watched and enjoyed the clip in the actual post. And went back to the front page and the correct video showed up. It is funny.

    Now if I could only figure out why the clip from Adam’s Ukraine post was showing up in this one……

    OK I am not going to allow myself to go down that road, I might only have 25-30 yrs of life left……

  59. 59.

    Bruce K in ATH-GR

    October 30, 2023 at 5:31 am

    I get the impression that the US keeps the old system of measurements out of a sort of sociological inertia – a third of a billion people spread across a significant fraction of a pretty large continent is a lot to deal with, after all – while the UK does so out of sheer bloody-mindedness.

    It also strikes me as peculiar that the UK still measures vehicle fuel economy in miles per gallon, while selling fuel by the liter. I don’t demand everyone go metric – heck, my brain still works in Fahrenheit even after being in Greece for fifteen years – but is it too much to ask to be consistent?

  60. 60.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 6:21 am

    @Bruce K in ATH-GR: They measure fuel efficiency in miles per imperial gallon, and since imperial gallons are bigger that makes the numbers look mysteriously impressive to Americans. Just one place where that difference can trip you up.

  61. 61.

    M31

    October 30, 2023 at 6:58 am

    years ago I played that fun “Dictionary” game with super nerdy grad school friends, and one day we had “bring your own dictionary day” and along with the usual Latin and Klingon and Anglo-Saxon, someone brought a book called “A Dictionary of Obsolete Cornish Agricultural Terms” published in like 1832

    it was amazing

  62. 62.

    Central Planning

    October 30, 2023 at 7:03 am

    @Odie Hugh Manatee: ​
    What kind of math is that?
    A liter is slightly bigger than a quart, so really you need to change your gallon uplift to $0.80 to make it close to a $0.20 liter increase. And, you’re ultimately paying less filling up your tank if there’s a $0.20/liter increase vs a $0.80/gallon increase.

  63. 63.

    lowtechcyclist

    October 30, 2023 at 7:24 am

    Since I’m pushing 70, I’ve grown up with inches, feet, yards, ounces and pounds, ounces and pints (is a pint the same as a pound? I remember asking my dad – they’re both 16 ounces!), but aware of the silliness of the whole system.

    But when I became a parent and my son was at an age to try to explain our systems of measurement to him, I totally gave up, and let the school system try to teach it to him.  It was one thing to keep it straight for myself, but the idea of explaining it to a child was just too much.

    Fuck this stupid measurement system, I’m ready for metric anytime we want to switch.

    (Except temperature.  The 0°-100° Fahrenheit range almost perfectly encapsulates the range of temperatures that are tolerable to be outside in.  If the temp outdoors is below zero or above 100, then most all of us just stay the fuck inside unless we have little choice about it.)

  64. 64.

    lowtechcyclist

    October 30, 2023 at 7:35 am

    @Odie Hugh Manatee:

    daily swings in the per unit price (.10-.20 cents a liter)

    Those are pretty minuscule price swings though – fractions of a penny?!  .20 cents per liter is still less than a penny per gallon. ;-)

  65. 65.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 7:49 am

    @lowtechcyclist: The weight of a fluid ounce of water is close to a weight ounce, but, again, there’s variation between US and British fluid ounces. I honestly never got the hang of ounces– these small units are where metric really makes more sense to me.

  66. 66.

    Matt McIrvin

    October 30, 2023 at 7:56 am

    (There’s an old rhyme, “a pint’s a pound the world around”, but it’s not– that’s only nearly true for US pints, of water or something of similar density. But a liter of water is close to a kilogram the world around. At least at everyday temperatures and pressures.)

  67. 67.

    WaterGirl

    October 30, 2023 at 8:48 am

    @SiubhanDuinne: So great.  Brilliant concept, brilliant writing, perfect delivery.

  68. 68.

    Betty

    October 30, 2023 at 9:15 am

    So unfair that I am not allowed to watch it because of living outside the US. (Sulking)

  69. 69.

    Another Scott

    October 30, 2023 at 9:37 am

    @StringOnAStick: PV = nRT

    OK, what is “R”??

    R = 10.731577089016 psi⋅ft3⋅lbmol−1⋅°R−1
    R = 8.31446261815324 J⋅K−1⋅mol−1
    R = 8.31446261815324×10^7 erg⋅K−1⋅mol−1
    R = 8.20573660809596…×10^−5 m3⋅atm⋅K−1⋅mol−1
    …

    That little equation teaches one the importance of consistent units, but man, it made trying to memorize what R was a pain in the butt.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  70. 70.

    schrodingers_cat

    October 30, 2023 at 10:17 am

    @Matt McIrvin: Same here. I don’t recall using anything other than metric in any physics (or STEM) class other than some conversion exercises in the intro physics cousrse.

    ETA: IIRC many engineers still use the FPS system.

  71. 71.

    Brachiator

    October 30, 2023 at 11:29 am

    @Matt McIrvin:

    For what it’s worth, right now the Tory government in the UK is making a big pointless noise about bringing back Imperial weights and measures, because tradition, and did those feet in ancient times walk upon England’s mountains green, or something.

    Very apt reference. It’s so strange, and funny, that fervent BREXIT supporters are saying, “We can’t bring back the actual Empire, but at least we can bring back Imperial Measure. God save the King!”

    Too ridiculous for words.

  72. 72.

    Unkown known

    October 31, 2023 at 1:57 pm

    @Matt McIrvin:

    Metric wins on this front. It is very water-based.

    1 cubic centimetre of water weighs 1 gram, and heating it 1 Celsius (or Kelvin)  takes 1 calorie of energy

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