If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to see an aged but well connected shlub vainly guess how to stand at attention in a uniform that’s never been inspected or tailored, enjoy your feast pic.twitter.com/BVJe9TVwbq
— Adam Weinstein (@AdamWeinstein) June 10, 2019
But he’ll settle for… whatever this is:
The 47-year-old O-1, commissioned alone by the VP whose political party he ran, at a full press conference in choker whites. This is such a fucking joke https://t.co/8m5tG5YX6J
— Adam Weinstein (@AdamWeinstein) June 10, 2019
I chuckled at the Reince Navy news but reserved major judgment when it was first floated awhile back. Strings had to be pulled, but maybe he really wanted to serve, right? If he’d just done it quietly, fine. But this fucking organized pony show makes the grift total and obvious
— Adam Weinstein (@AdamWeinstein) June 10, 2019
To be fair, "Make the grift total and obvious" is pretty much the party slogan these days.
— Bryce Dubee (@Dubeeous) June 10, 2019
I hear both Gilbert AND Sullivan attended.
— Andy Gill (@andygill17) June 10, 2019
47 year old Ensign? What is this, the “Make-A-Wish” Foundation?
— All The Winning… (@sockalexis2003) June 11, 2019
What he wants is to serve his pockets with a pension. He's in the Reserves. He'll never see the inside of a ship, either as he's assigned to Human Resources.
— AUNTIE LILO (@LiloAuntie) June 11, 2019
I could see him balancing a ball on his nose, and eating raw mackerel, but beyond that?
— Damien MacCearnaigh (@MrMuncherToYou) June 11, 2019
Naw. I spent more than 2 decades in uniform. I've seen this shit more times than I can count.
It's a joke. He's a joke. It's just something rich people do so they can hang a portrait of themselves in uniform over the mantle.
— Stonekettle (@Stonekettle) June 10, 2019
Is this where we start getting thr banana republic officials with nonsense fruit salad?
— * jon hendry * ??♂️ (@JonathanWHendry) June 10, 2019
Rented Valor.
— Topical Text Goes Here (@borgdad) June 11, 2019
Laundry officer on the USS MCCAIN!!
— Jeffrey L. O'Malley (@icebergdad) June 10, 2019
He can't find a job. #ETTD
— REDACTED (@mrshellwinger) June 11, 2019
oatler.
I say he’s a spinach-Nazi and to spinach-hell with him.
plato
Everything the totus thug’s admin touches turns into shit.
Amir Khalid
Exempted from basic officer training, freshly commissioned, and already a medal on his chest? What did he get that for?
stibbert
This guy’s greatest service to the nation will be paying his dry-cleaning bills.
Omnes Omnibus
Get the fucking uniform tailored, for Christ’s sake.
opiejeanne
@Amir Khalid: For making his bed every morning.
Omnes Omnibus
@Amir Khalid: It is the National Defense Service Medal. Anyone who serves/d during a time of actual hostilities receives that medal.
ETA: If you remember “A Few Good Men,” it was the one medal that Tom Cruise had on his uniform.
arrieve
I’m never awake for the late night open threads, but I woke up feeling sick and couldn’t go back to sleep. Then I made the mistake of looking at this picture. Holy crap on a cracker, cannot take Bizarro World right now.
Amir Khalid
@Omnes Omnibus:
I thought you had to have served to get the medal. That is, on your first day you won’t have earned it yet.
Waynski
@Amir Khalid: I think the medal is a participation medal.
David ??Merry Christmas?? Koch
Worst local production of Mister Roberts – EVAH!
Amir Khalid
@Waynski:
You mean, like in kindergarten? I suppose I find that apt.
tokyokie
My nephew got married in his Navy whites a few years back. But then, he was on active duty and it meant he didn’t have to rent a tux.
tokyokie
@Amir Khalid: The only difference is he won’t do any finger-painting while wearing his whites.
Arclite
Wow, Twitter was brutal.
Arclite
Not really related to anything, but revisiting Doug and Bob McKenzie’s hit single with Geddy Lee is pure joy.
Waynski
@Amir Khalid: It’s exactly what I mean. Like in kindergarten. Glad you find it apt. Actually, if you look closely at the medal, it looks like it has a smiley face on it.
Grung_e_gene
@Amir Khalid: National Defense (automatic and open-ended since 09/11/01)
Mel
@Amir Khalid: I think that’s the Grift Scouts badge for “best imitation of a surly tween-aged girl who just got detention.” Seriously, that posture and expression take me right back to teaching 7th grade. All that’s missing is a dramatic eye roll and a “Hello Kitty bookbag. My grandfather was in the Navy during WWIi. I think I can hear him rolling over in his grave over this latest debacle.
How is your guitar playing going? Your guitar adventures have inspired me, and I’m thinking about getting a banjo and playing again. It’s been a couple of decades and some arthritic fingers since I played regularly though, so it will probably be like starting from square one again!
Omnes Omnibus
@Amir Khalid:
MFA
That’s not the one they award for vainglorious service?
JR
This is pretty much how the French military was organized circa 1789
Amir Khalid
@Mel:
I think I am slowly improving. I was a little afraid at first, as a lefty learning to play right-handed at my age, but now I think I can do it.
mrmoshpotato
@Arclite: Thank you Arclite. That was hilarious.
JoyceH
Retired Navy officer here. And when I was Priebus’ age, I’d been RETIRED for SIX years.
biff murphy
With no prior military experience…The general age requirement for the Navy Reserve is that you must be between the ages of 18-39 and be able to have 20 years of total service by age 60… As an ex-navy man find it reprehensible that this toad could join the navy with no prior military, no boot camp, no schooling, just political connections, fuck this toad. Really.
Dorothy A. Winsor
I somehow missed hearing about this until I saw this picture just now. WTF? Why do they do this to themselves? Was there no one around to say this is a bad idea?
JoyceH
@Dorothy A. Winsor: But Vlad thinks it’s a great idea. Like back in the old Soviet days when every military unit had a “political officer” whose job was to ensure correct thinking and party loyalty. Just call him Comrade Commissar.
Zinsky
Fascists have always liked dressing up in military regalia. It gives them an illusory sense of power and dominance they lack in their personal lives. It is sexually stimulating to many and properly gives them a boner. I’m sure Reince’s tiny organ was at attention throughout the entire ceremony. Sick deviants…
Another Scott
@biff murphy: Military.com has more.
tl;dr – there are reasonable policies that let oldsters take up special positions when they normally would be too old. Whether Preibus should be one of those exceptions is something I can’t answer. One thing that does give me a bit of hope that this isn’t an over-the-top grift is that he’s going in as the lowest officer possible, not a Captain or something…
FWIW.
Cheers,
Scott.
J R in WV
I was an E-2 when I enlisted, at the point of a gun, during the Vietnam draft. I was an E-2 years later when I was honorably discharged, after working my ass off, doing what I was told.
This is an insult to every working enlisted in the military, ever. Of course, now he has to follow the orders of every officer in the USN.
MattF
Maybe he’s trying to get back onto Trump’s staff. ‘Why wasn’t I invited to the party? Would a uniform help? Can I be a general?’
Barbara
I would die of embarrassment if I did this.
Ken B
Does this mean he’s under the UCMJ?
Eural Joiner
@Arclite:
Just picked up Geddy’s Big Book of Bass for a musician friend as a surprise gift – it is a beautiful, beautiful book and just fascinating even for a non-musician :)
Mike R
@JoyceH: Perfect.
lee
@Ken B: Yes.
I also want to know WTF is going on here? Does this sort of thing happen on a regular basis (vanity commissions)?
ottercliff
Somebody is getting ready to run for office!
And who wouldn’t vote for a man who earned a medal on their first day in the Navy Reserves?
He’ll be an Admiral by Christmas…….
Aleta
If he ever had to go before a judge, a selfless service record would come in handy.
Faithful Lurker
I don’t know very much about military protocol but doesn’t he now have to follow the orders of the commander in chief? His mouth is shut and he’ll get a pension soon.
Cermet
@Faithful Lurker: No, that is enlisted. An officer must uphold the Constitution first and foremost. He must follow lawful orders only and that, the orange fart cloud is incapable of issuing.
...now I try to be amused
The National Defense Service Medal even goes to cadets. It truly is a participation award.
Quaker in a Basement
Were they all out of pirate costumes?
L85NJGT
Did McConnell blackball him from a Kentucky Colonel commission?
@lee:
Back in the day one could pull some favors (or put up some money to equip a unit) and wangle a state commission, and during the big war they pulled in specialized skill sets for key areas (filmmaker John Ford was a Commander). But at his age, the rank and job they gave him is “are you fucking serious?”
Nick Schuldig
@Omnes Omnibus: @Omnes Omnibus:
Back in my day we called that the “mess hall ribbon”. You got one for getting your first meal down. Used to be it was only for enlisted folks, and seeing it on an officer was a sign of someone who came up through ranks. Since then, though, they’ve given it it all officers.
Omnes Omnibus
@Nick Schuldig: When was your day? I have never seen anything that indicates that it was ever an enlisted only award. The only awards that are enlisted
only in the army at least IIRC are the Good Conduct Medal and the NCO Professional Development Ribbon.
Mike G
We’re almost down to the corruption and grift levels of the Civil War era, when well-connected politician-clowns could be commissioned as generals.
Nick Schulig
@Omnes Omnibus:
Inducted Jan ’67. Some time in the late 80s I saw a LtC give a talk and noted his “national service” ribbon. Afterwards I asked if he’d been enlisted. He knew right away why I’d asked. Maybe the change had been so recent that he could have been self-conscious about it. Told me no, that ribbon is for officers now, too. It used to mean nearly nothing, and now means less.
Looking forward to the day that officers get good conduct medals. That would be like getting a C in your own department in grad school. But they do covet that colorful stuff on their dress uniforms.