Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

You come for women, you’re gonna get your ass kicked.

The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Sadly, there is no cure for stupid.

“Until such time as the world ends, we will act as though it intends to spin on.”

Since we are repeating ourselves, let me just say fuck that.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

Republican speaker of the house Mike Johnson is the bland and smiling face of evil.

Whoever he was, that guy was nuts.

SCOTUS: It’s not “bribery” unless it comes from the Bribery region of France. Otherwise, it’s merely “sparkling malfeasance”.

Not so fun when the rabbit gets the gun, is it?

The fundamental promise of conservatism all over the world is a return to an idealized past that never existed.

Our messy unity will be our strength.

The next time the wall street journal editorial board speaks the truth will be the first.

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

It’s pointless to bring up problems that can only be solved with a time machine.

Black Jesus loves a paper trail.

Rupert, come get your orange boy, you petrified old dinosaur turd.

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

People really shouldn’t expect the government to help after they watched the GOP drown it in a bathtub.

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

’Where will you hide, Roberts, the laws all being flat?’

You are here: Home / John Cole Presents "Stories from the Road" / And Another Thing

Reader Interactions

133Comments

  2. 2.

    BigJimSlade

    LGM had some Spinal Tap post today, so the first thing I thought of when he said, “Arizona broke me” was Break Like the Wind, lol.

  4. 4.

    Hidalgo de Arizona

    Come back in three months and then you can have the Arizona summer *actually* break you.

  7. 7.

    Suzanne

    Just accept that you’re old and a snowbird now. You’re supposed to leave in mid-April. You can head back just before Thanksgiving.

  9. 9.

    Armadillo

    So the pricing will be like:

    $10/mo: three nude videos a day

    $20/mo: one nude video a day

    $30/mo: John Cole agrees to never send you nudes

    Sorry not sorry

  10. 10.

    geg6

    It was in the 50s, 60s and 70s the entire time you were gone.  As soon as you got started on your trip home, the weather turned to this shit.  I blame you.  Warmest winter I can remember and warmest February on record.  March started lovely.  Then Cole heads home and we’re freezing our asses off.  Fuck you, Cole.

  11. 11.

    HumboldtBlue

    Kentucky, a No. 3 seed, is about to get knocked out of the first round of March Madness!

  21. 21.

    lurker

    looks like Adam was so jealous of the onlyfans announcement the he bigfooted the post by posting one half an hour earlier…

     

    I have a hamster that has expressed great interest in seeing a Cole onlyfans channel and will subscribe at a premium level…

     

    Also, I will be investigating how a hamster can have a credit card and learn to talk…

  23. 23.

    Jackie

    John, you need a dog to snuggle up to, to stay warm! Albeit a puppers, get those long-johns on and dig out your wool socks.

  25. 25.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @lurker:  I have a hamster that has expressed great interest in seeing a Cole onlyfans channel and will subscribe at a premium level…

    Also, I will be investigating how a hamster can have a credit card and learn to talk…

    The actual unbelievable thing is that a credit card holding, talking hamster would show any interest in such an OnlyFans page.

  29. 29.

    Ksmiami

    Will the Only Fans subscription include naked mopping? Long term Balloon Juicers want to know…

  30. 30.

    Jackie

    @Juju: Kentucky is #3.

    I root for the underdogs and upsets 95% of March Madness. I have my bracket printed out but I only use it to mark who I hope will win at each level, and celebrate each underdog that beats the odds and advances one more level. I love love love it when the #1 seeds get booted out early lol!

  31. 31.

    oklahomo

    A pair of coverall with a convenient “hatch” will have money raining from the skies.  Or bombs.  Either way.

  34. 34.

    Brachiator

    Catching up with movies. I finally saw “Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning Part 1.” I loved the previous movie in the franchise, “Rogue Nation,” which expertly ratcheted up the tension with increasingly dazzling stunt work and villains with layered motives. I also like how Tom Cruise, whose company produces these films, generously involves the female stars in the narrative and action.

    “Dead Reckoning” brings back Rebecca Ferguson and adds the amazingly luminous Hayley Atwell to the proceedings. I don’t understand why Atwell is not a bigger star, especially given her appearances in the hugely successful Avengers films.

    Anyway, despite the cast and the expertly executed action set pieces, this movie is bloated and uninvolving. I think the main problem is that the stunts don’t really build to much of anything, and the action is stitched around a dull plot. Also, in the original TV series and some of the early films, the Impossible Mission Force is an expert group working for a mainly benign government. But this film comes up with a lame back story for the Tom Cruise character stolen from the old TV series “It Takes a Thief.” And so, the Cruise character is a talented criminal recruited by the government and forced to work for them. This is not really a spoiler since it is not particularly important to the story. It just brands his team as misfits who depend on one another. Isn’t that Fast and Furious?

    That this is pointlessly part one of a longer story means that the already over long film just comes to an unsatisfying halt, while the gears slowly crank up for the conclusion next year or whenever. The villains want something, but they are also dull and in the end I just didn’t care, which is too bad because I think that the cast really deserved a better film.

    By contrast, “The Burial,” on Amazon prime was a delightful gem.

    Willie E. Gary, an unconventional lawyer, helps Jeremiah Joseph O’Keefe, a funeral home owner with financial troubles, save his family business from a corporate behemoth.

    Jamie Foxx plays the attorney, Tommy Lee Jones is the funeral home owner, and they are a joy to watch. Despite his Oscar win for “Ray,” I think that Foxx is underrated. It’s fun to watch how he builds the character of the flamboyant lawyer and he and Jones play off one another very well.

    The supporting cast are all great, and there are nice little directing and story choices that elevate this film above the standard “little guy vs an evil corporation” tale.

  36. 36.

    Dangerman

    @Jackie: I love teams heavy with Upper Classmen (i.e. not the UK typical one and dones; I have no idea if that applies this year).

    My upset pick on Day 1 was Samford over Kansas. Mostly because I detest Kansas as much as Kentucky (although my heart softens with a picture of Ashley Judd).

    C’mon Samford.

  39. 39.

    Lyrebird

    @FastEdD:

    I’m into Onlygrans. They wear aprons and bake pies while you watch.

    Thanks – this lifted up my evening!

    I should look back and find the Youtube channel Betty Cracker mentioned, some British interviewer going around Italy to film nonnas making some of their favorite pasta dishes.

  40. 40.

    frosty

    No, actually, it really is fucking freezing here. Although I admit heading south for the winter is addictive. We just got back from our 10th Annual Snowbird Road Trip.

  42. 42.

    Omnes Omnibus

    @Jackie: I just want to see Wisconsin and Marquette face off in the Final Four.  I didn’t go to either of them, but it would be great for the state.

  43. 43.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Ksmiami: ​
     This is indeed a subject of enormous interest.
    Totally OT: Oregon has advanced in March Madness by taking South Carolina out.

  48. 48.

    The Kropenhagen Interpretation

    I just started watching Night Court for the first time since childhood.

    How old have I gotten that Inthink John Larroquette circa 1984 was cute.

  51. 51.

    Jackie

    @Dangerman: I’m a lifelong eastern Washingtonian, so I will root for WSU and Gonzaga (although I’ve lost my rose colored glasses on them after YEARS of 💔,) but otherwise… GOOO UNDERDOGS!

  52. 52.

    Villago Delenda Est

    @Jackie: I though the subject of the thread was the absolute horror of a possible Cole OnlyFans account.  So naturally I indicated OT even though others (such as yourself) have made comments on March Madness.

  54. 54.

    The Kropenhagen Interpretation

    @Villago Delenda Est: I’ve been advised only even number Star Trek movies.

    How is this movie

    ETA: I never noticed he kinda has freckles

    EATA: Ah, the Search for Spock. Perhaps I’ll give 2 a rewatch first.

  55. 55.

    Jager

    @oklahomo:

    Speaking of trapdoors. I wandered into my old man’s office at the car store after school one day. He was wrapping up a truck deal with a grizzled farmer. The farmer wrote a check and left. I asked my dad why the guy smelled so bad, dad replied, “His wife sews him into his long johns around Thanksgiving, and doesn’t cut him out of them until the spring thaw.”

  56. 56.

    Mike in NC

    WV was one of our very favorite trips when we got married: Antietam battlefield, Shepperdstown, Bavarian Inn, and Harper’s Ferry. Fantastic sample of our history.

  58. 58.

    Jackie

    Now this is OT!

    Ken Buck says a final FU!! to his fellow Republicans by being the first GQPer to sign the Dem’s discharge position!😂👍🏻

    Rep. Ken Buck (Colo.) became the first GOP member to sign the House Democrats’ aid discharge position on Thursday, just one day before he is set to retire from Congress.

    Though Buck is retiring on Friday, his name will remain on the petition until a successor is elected. Colorado Gov. Jared Polis (D) said last week a special election to fill his seat will likely be aligned with the state’s primary election on June 25. If his successor also signs on to the petition, Buck’s name will be removed.

    thehill.com/homenews/house/4548713-ken-buck-becomes-first-republican-to-sign-democrats-discharge-pet…

  59. 59.

    The Kropenhagen Interpretation

    @Jackie: Sometimes even retirement doesn’t bring Republicans around to doing the right thing. Good for him.

  61. 61.

    The Kropenhagen Interpretation

    @Jackie: I’m sure, at a minimum, it will bring him some measure of peace.

    Low key I thought you meant retiring to the marijuana industry. I wasn’t expecting that link. It certainly fits, though.

  63. 63.

    Odie Hugh Manatee

    Hey John, maybe you can model chaps in a rainbow pattern that look like overalls. Sans pants of course. Now I wouldn’t be interested in subscribing, just offering suggestions that might enhance your traffic and cash flow.

    👀

  64. 64.

    SmallAxe

    Lmao it’s literally 70° right now at 8:30 at night in Phoenix, this is as nice as it gets. Low of 52 overnight ffs put on sweatshirt Cole

  65. 65.

    NotMax

    If it’s any consolation, been unseasonably chilly on Maui the past fortnight or so, also too. As in dropping into the 50s and briefly flirting with the high 40s some nights at my elevation. Even in daytime, have been a spate of days this month in the middle 60s.

  71. 71.

    CaseyL

    …Weren’t you going to go to bed early?  Some of your feeling of freezing could be fatigue.

    I wish I had some good advice.  Maybe put a heating blanket on the sofa, or your office chair, so you can stand to be out of bed?  Hopefully the cats will be extra cuddly!

  72. 72.

    Mousebumples

    @Omnes Omnibus: I just want to see Wisconsin and Marquette face off in the Final Four. I didn’t go to either of them, but it would be great for the state.

    I think they’re in the same regional this year, but I’d be happy with an a Elite Eight faceoff.

    Also wondering if my alma mater can bust some brackets…

  74. 74.

    Lyrebird

    @Omnes Omnibus: Howdy Omnes,

    I just got into a rant about human dignity (of immigrants in this case) in the Donnie thread a few posts down, was thinking of you because you’re strong on that point.

  75. 75.

    Redshift

    I was a little worried when you talked about it being warm enough to leave the cats in the car, JC, because it sure wasn’t back east. But I assumed you’d checked for the places you were likely to be spending nights on the way.

  78. 78.

    Redshift

    Oh, hey! I saw a cybertruck in the wild for the first time ever. It was parked on the street in DC, not too far from the White House. (We were taking my cousin in law around to see the monuments.)

  79. 79.

    Dangerman

    Hold on. Samford making a run.

    75-79. 5:58 to play

    ETA: 78-79. 5:15. Guess I wasn’t a complete dolt.

  80. 80.

    Jackie

    Zags won handily. WSU Cougs squeaked by to win their first NCAA playoff game since 2008!

    I’m off to a good start!😁🏀🏀

  84. 84.

    Jackie

    Apparently the NCAA brackets are busted according to the “experts.” That’s what makes the whole March Madness Maddening!😂

  85. 85.

    Dangerman

    Apologies to any Samford Bulldogs out there. I jinxed them. Helluva run though. No over yet. Just mostly over in a Billy Crystal kinda way.

  89. 89.

    Redshift

    @dmsilev: At night, it didn’t look too bad. Meaning not too bad for a mid-range vehicle, butt ugly for something demanding a luxury price.

    Also, being parked in a line of cars at the curb makes it even more obvious it’s a car, but any kind of “truck.”

  90. 90.

    Jackie

    TIFG canceled his trip to Arizona because he’s broke 😂

    Former President Donald Trump is facing mounting financial difficulties in his campaign — to the point where he is reportedly being forced to triage which states he can afford to hold rallies in.

    According to a new CNN report, Trump was planning to hold a rally in Arizona last weekend, on the same day he rallied in Ohio to support his endorsed Senate candidate Bernie Moreno, but backed out at the last minute.

    “On Wednesday, Biden was in Arizona to announce $8.5 billion going toward a new Intel chip processing plant outside of Phoenix, returning to a state he visited twice in the second half of last year,” reported Edward Isaac-Dovere and Kristen Holmes.

    “Trump had been looking at a trip to the state – which went for Biden by just 10,457 votes in 2020 – for last weekend, the same day as his Ohio rally. But those plans were scrapped after clinching the presidential nomination, with two sources citing a desire to save money and attend a more politically advantageous event in Ohio rallying for Moreno.”

    The Trump campaign is being significantly outraised by the Biden campaign and has faced other complications, including warnings from the Federal Election Commission to stop accepting illegal contributions.

  96. 96.

    TS

    @Jackie:

    including warnings from the Federal Election Commission to stop accepting illegal contributions.

    Has he ever had a warning about spending his election campaign funds on unrelated legal expenses? I cannot believe he can do this unimpeded?

  99. 99.

    Citizen Alan

    @Armadillo:  I dunno. I’ve been fascinated by the thought of him naked-mopping for as long as I have been following this blog. Perhaps in a train wreck sort of way but still.

  102. 102.

    Yutsano

    @Jackie: Wazzu should have so lost that game. But instead they scored enough in the last two minutes and got out of a big jam early!

  103. 103.

    Martin

    @TS: Who is going to stop him? The FEC has been deadlocked on everything for as long as I can remember.

  104. 104.

    piratedan

    @Yutsano: that Cougar team is like biting on tinfoil, they don’t look like anything extraordinary but all they do is play solid, disciplined hoops and do their best to not beat themselves.

  105. 105.

    Tony Jay

    Huh? I thought there already was a Cole Onlyfans channel. What the hell have I been watching for the last three months?

    ETA – Now that I ponder it, the Attenborough voiceover and the heavy concentration on salmon and hibernation narratives should have been a clue.

  106. 106.

    Manyakitty

    @Redshift: I saw one driving through a parking lot in Tampa the other day. Response from one of our dinner companions: “Sorry about your penis.”

  108. 108.

    Baud

    @Jay:

    High gas prices will hand the election to Trump and destroy Ukraine.  We saw how people reacted a few years ago when prices spiked.

  109. 109.

    TBone

    Poetic justice: a great way to start the day. Every day, as predicted, is getting worse and worse for Dotard. Comment of the Day (it’s still early though):

    “I read through the order and I have to admit my favorite part is when he empowers Barbara Jones to hire any and all outside professionals to help guard against wrongful transfer or dissipation of any of his assets and Donald Trump has to pay for it,” Kirschner said. “It is, I think, poetic justice that Donald Trump will be hiring the watchdogs that are keeping guard over Donald Trump to make sure he does not mishandle any of his assets.”

    rawstory.com/trump-poetic-justice-monitoring/

    The Reaper 😎

  110. 110.

    TBone

    I’m telling hubby (who is scheduled for surgery in a few hours) that our furnace needs the yearly maintenance (cleaning, filter change) and he says don’t bother.  I’m not buying that, isn’t it supposed to be done yearly or am I being too proactive here?  It was done last March.  The system is as OLD as I am.

  111. 111.

    Jay

    @Baud:

    ruZZian oil fuels the entire ruZZian war machine, that and stolen Ukrainian grain.

    Every single ruZZian “Oil Company” has merc units fighting against Ukraine, funded by barely sanctioned oil.

    The US has become, a nation of pussies, no longer a reliable ally to anyone.

  112. 112.

    Jay

    @TBone:

    Cleaning, is no biggie, got a shop vac and a wire brush?

    Ditto for filter changes, got a hardware store near by?

    I can walk you through it if you want.

  113. 113.

    TBone

    @Jay: thank you!  You have inspired me to watch a YouToob video or 2 and do it myself (saving the $200+ for spending on upcoming roof repairs and surgery co-pays).  Hubby fixed our trip lever tub drain and a toilet recently with the aid of such videos.  We can do it!

  114. 114.

    Jay

    @TBone:

    Yeah, you can. And yeah, you save money.

    The only key thing, is the heat exchanger. If there are any cracks, holes, broken seams, Carbon Monoxide poisoning.

    Give it a good scrub with a brass wire brush, vacuum it off well, look for any cracks, holes, broken seams.

    It’s just a few hours job done right.

  115. 115.

    Baud

    @Jay:

    Agree. Other countries shouldn’t count on us until we get our house in order. But some countries like Ukraine have few alternatives.

  116. 116.

    Jay

    @Baud:

    Ukraine isn’t going to stop hitting ruZZian refineries.

    Their life is on the line,

    yours is not,

    Yet

    So it’s just “you are doing it wrong” comments in the US NatSec Pussy Brigade.

    Cowards all.

  121. 121.

    Jay

    @TBone:

    yeah done right, it’s just a few hours job.

    Never seen it done right.

    They just change out the filters, ($20), vacuum the lint out, bill you $200 to $375, and leave in under an hour.

  122. 122.

    TBone

    @Jay: we were lucky, for once.  Usually don’t get such competence in these parts, but we stumbled on to a guy who does a really good job of it (“Farmer” Andy is his name) through our heating oil company.  He’s done such a good job previously that the old furnace looks shiny new when he’s done, which is why I’m confident that, this year, we can do it ourselves and have him come back next year instead.  I’ll be taking my magnifying glass (under the bright light of my “deer spotting” LED lamp) to the heat exchanger after wire brush & shop vac.  Glad we’ll be using the vac for something other than cleaning up water in the basement!  Your advice is greatly appreciated!

  123. 123.

    Jay

    @TBone:

    Don’t forget a mirror, to inspect the parts of the heat exchanger you can’t see in line of sight

    “Farmer” Andy sounds like a mench.

  124. 124.

    lowtechcyclist

    @TBone: ​
     

    Glad we’ll be using the vac for something other than cleaning up water in the basement!

    Are you kidding? A decent wet/dry vac beats a Swiss army knife with all the things it can do. I’ve got a Ridgid wet/dry vac, and you can take the motor off the body of the vac, put the attachments into the exhaust, and use it as a blower. It’s what I use to blow the leaves off the deck and driveway. Before I got the leaf-guard kind of gutters, I used to hook up a U-bend attachment to it and use to to clean the gutters! And I occasionally even use it to vacuum the basement.

    Hadn’t thought of using it to clean the HVAC system, I’ll have to give that a try. :-)

  125. 125.

    Manyakitty

    @TBone: FWIW, I change the furnace filter every other month. We have cats and a cigarette smoker in the house and it makes a difference.

  126. 126.

    BellyCat

    Five years ago, furnace would not turn on at beginning of heating season. Newer hot water radiator furnace with circuit boards.

    Two HVAC guys came to clean and diagnose. Paid $400 for cleaning and diagnosis that it needed a new $1,800 circuit board to work. I ordered one myself for $800 and installed it. Still didn’t work.

    I hit up YouTube and called manufacturer. Both old and new circuit boards checked out fine.

    Turns out a spider had crawled down the exhaust duct and built a nest at the combustion valve, blocking air intake! I put a screen in the exhaust duct and haven’t had a problem since.

    Conclusion: Furnace “cleaning” is a racket. You can and will do a better job than 99% of the so-called pros charging a fixed fee, motivated to get in and out as fast as possible.

  127. 127.

    TBone

    Thanks, everyone!  I’ve got a handheld mirror (I used to use it for makeup back when I wore that stuff).  The oil filters are a always gloppy mess so I’m ready to bag that up.  Will watch several videos before our attempt!  Hubby is in hospital having surgery right now, so it’ll be a week or 3 before this job gets tackled.  I’m his only nurse and he’s not allowed to move around much (or lift anything heavy like a gallon of milk) so he doesn’t have an arterial blowout.  Keeping him down won’t be easy, he’s a goer!  Lots of videos will be helpful!

    Oh, and as far as vacuums, I’ve got one for each job in this house. Hardwood floors, carpets, kitty litter, and wet/gloppy messes each has its own sucker upper 😊 plus an electric leaf blower for blowjobs.

  128. 128.

    evodevo

    @TBone: ​
    Yes…for a fuel oil furnace, a yearly checkup IS necessary. The scum buildup can make the thing go up like a candle if it isn’t dealt with on a timely basis. Watched a neighbor’s trailer go up because of “furnace neglect” – and HE was a firefighter…should really have known better, but he WAS a dumbass.

  129. 129.

    Paul in KY

    @HumboldtBlue: I’m ready to part ways with Cal. Whatever he had (getting absolute best Freshmen & playing great D) is gone.

    2015 broke the magic. If you can’t win NCAAs with that team, you won’t ever, IMO.

  132. 132.

    Paul in KY

    John, just saw that Little River Band is playing up at Summerfest in Milwaukee. Late June I think.

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