Excellent piece by Mark Warren at the Esquire Political Blog on why “The Republicans Pray for Rain — and Rick Perry“:
Lord knows they’d like to water the tree of liberty here in Texas — right now, before it’s too dang late — as the Obammunists pillage and seize everything that’s not tied down, and hollow out the Constitution and enslave us and subvert our food pyramid. Trouble is, it hasn’t rained in, like, a year down here. All the trees are parched, and a bunch of them are on fire. And so as a 21st century man, the governor, Rick Perry, did the only reasonable thing recently and had a resolution passed through the legislature asking for all of his fellow Texans — Mooslims and everybody — to pray for rain:
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NOW, THEREFORE, I, RICK PERRY, Governor of Texas, under the authority vested in me by the Constitution and Statutes of the State of Texas, do hereby proclaim the three-day period from Friday, April 22, 2011, to Sunday, April 24, 2011, as Days of Prayer for Rain in the State of Texas. I urge Texans of all faiths and traditions to offer prayers on that day for the healing of our land, the rebuilding of our communities and the restoration of our normal way of life.
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After heated debate on the House floor, the resolution passed. A late amendment, which also would have had Texans “baying at the moon,” in an effort to “show God we’re serious,” was narrowly defeated…
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Especially now that Perry has increasingly become the subject of Republican powerbroker fantasies, take a good look at his rain resolution. You might think that such a bit of legislative frippery is but a curio, a moment of lightness in a schedule full of grave executive consequence, but friend, you would be mistaken. For in my beloved homeland of Texas, the governor can veto bills, appoint members of state agencies and commissions, suggest resolutions asking the Almighty to do stuff, and that is all. I make this point chiefly because the nation still — after much recent experience with Texan heads of state — hasn’t quite grokked to the fact that, while it may prepare you for some things in life, the Texas governorship might not be the best out-of-town warm-up for the American presidency.
[…] __
Witness this year’s gruesome session of the Texas Legislature, which began in January and saw the state facing a $27 billion budget shortfall. As Perry revs the engines and gets his message together to run for president, you will likely not see much about this dire condition when the Texas Miracle is mentioned, nor will you see much about the bloodletting that just took place to place to balance the books. Because that kind of talk would also lead to the obvious fact that Perry has presided over a drastic withdrawal of support for public education in Texas – $4 billion cut, this year alone, which is projected to lead to the loss of thousands of teachers, among other bad consequences… That kind of talk might also lead to the fact that although Texas is second in the nation in population, it ranks forty-fifth in level of tax per capita. Texas, in fact, hasn’t had a new tax bill in more than twenty years, opting instead to divest in the future and implement savage cuts in essential services. And it might lead to the recognition that part of the Texas Miracle has 10% of the state’s population working for the minimum wage, the highest percentage in the country. Or that more than a quarter of Texans are uninsured. Or that Texas has no state income tax, and so relies on the sales tax, the most regressive kind of tax there is, and shifts the burden for education and other vital services to strapped local governments that rely on the property tax. That is not how the future is created.
Much, much more — including details of Perry’s overnight conversion from conservative Democrat to proto-teabagger Republican — at the link. Click over now, and thank me later.
Cat Lady
You forgot the “We Are All Mayans Now” tag, since human sacrifice can’t be far behind.
cathyx
Texas is second in the nation in population and it ranks forty-fifth in level of tax per capita.
Sounds like Texas needs to raise taxes on the lower and middle income people.
Sko Hayes
His futile prayers don’t seem to be working, as May was even drier than April.
I live in western Kansas, and it’s just as bad here, but at least I don’t expect some so-called “merciful” being to fix it for me.
Hey, maybe we should do a reverse Pat Robertson here and ask why is Texas being punished by God?
geg6
The Cat has a point. Human sacrifice has about as much effect on rainfall totals as prayer.
The GOP thinks Governor Good Hair will be their savior from the Kenyan Mooslem hordes? Seriously? The guy who was calling for secession a few short months ago? Really? Go for it Goopers! Please!
PeakVT
I’d like to think having a conservative, secessionist, airhead Republican from Texas on the ticket would turn off even the lowest of low-info swing voters. I really would.
Constance Reader
10% making minimum wage…and that doesn’t even tell the whole story. The minimum wage is $7.75/hour, but vast number of jobs in this state (not just \service sector, but also clerical/admin office jobs, jobs in all sectors requiring a some education or training beyond high school) pay only $8/hour which is effectively minimum wage. If you added in those jobs…well, I really don’t want to think about what that percentage would be.
cathyx
It’s because of all the fags who live there.
Boudica
Minimum wage is $7.25. But point well-taken. I’ve got two more years in Texas till my youngest graduates HS and then I’m outta here.
Roger Moore
@Sko Hayes:
Because of teh ghey. SATSQ.
Yutsano
One of the few things Washington State does right: our minimum wage is $8.50, adjusted to the cost of living avreage every year. Which means it hasn’t gone up in two years because COLA hasn’t, but I bet that changes this year. Highest minimum wage in the country. At this rate we’ll be on parity with Canada soon.
PeakVT
@Constance Reader: Texas has the third highest inequality out of the 50 states.
Davis X. Machina
@PeakVT:
The GOP secret is that political appeals to the inner peasant work.
I wouldn’t count on the median voter’s grasp of modern notions like cause-and-effect and his or her ability to perform the hedonistic calculus to save the Republic.
And it’s not the low-information voters who scare me. It’s the high-misinformation voters.
Third Eye Open
Since it’s the sabbath, I won’t be doing anything that involves research, but are there any BJers who can point to Perry’s leadership with regards to water-issues, specifically conservation? Seriously, I want to know what they plan on doing for Plan-B? Is Plan-B:Run?
As a much smarter person than I once said, “Pray to God, but row away from the rocks”
Constance Reader
Boudica @ 8: I have several friends who have made the same decision, they’ve set a deadline and then are emigrating to the relatively sane Pacific northwest or Atlantic northeast. And others of us are seriously considering it.
WereBear
I believe Texas is following Arizona’s lead; these policies are designed to outsource their poor, unemployed, and ill.
Maybe I think that way because I spent my adolescence in Florida; and decided to make my adult life ELSEWHERE. But I think they will also drive away the middle class, too; at least, once they grind them down to becoming poor, unemployed, and ill.
Because all they really want is the rich people. This makes them think that it is, also, all they really need.
Brian S
I think the standard joke answer is something along the lines of “because God is jealous he’s not a Texan” or something similar.
It’s not something I normally admit in polite company, but I was born in Texas. My parents left when I was 7 and I’ve never felt the need to return except for cursory visits. When I used to drive I-40 from Arkansas to New Mexico on vacation, I’d stop for gas in Oklahoma and then not stop again until I was in Tucumcari. It’s small of me, I know but I can live with that.
Linda Featheringill
They pray for “healing of our land, the rebuilding of our communities and the restoration of our normal way of life”
The desire, in the midst of changes, for restoration of a normal way of life is most understandable. We all feel that way from time to time. The Texans have my sympathy.
I’ve lived in Texas and still have extended family there. These family members are all made up of that blend of intelligence, native wisdom, and outright stupidity that only the American Southwest can produce.
To all the folks in Texas, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Colorado, and parts of Kansas that are undergoing extreme drought:
Life moves forward. You can’t go back. Anybody who tells you that things don’t have to change is lying to you. Rick Perry is lying to you. James Inhofe is lying to you.
Climate change is coming. I’m sorry, but it is.
Davis X. Machina
A society composed of croppies and the people up in an teach mór (the Big House) is stable, if you can produce and tolerate a certain level of violence and coercion. In the long sweep of history, it’s been the norm.
Self-government isn’t just hard work, it’s unproven.
Remember what Zhou Enlai said when asked about the Enlightenment: “It’s too soon to tell.”
S. cerevisiae
I have read in several places over the years that there are some serious (ghey) skeletons in Perry’s closet that could cause him some trouble with the talibangicals. I have no idea if there is any truth to this, but do any of the local folks know anything about this?
WereBear
At least, I’m sure that will be the party line.
Why the disbelief of godless liberals should be more powerful than the prayers of the faithful was never explained to me, back in the day. I can’t find the link now, but there was a blogger explaining that Communism so frightened Christians that they agreed to an unholy alliance if there ever was one: they would blend their sweet Jesus with the Chamber of Commerce and begin the task of encouraging mammon worship, instead.
And now we have Republican Christianity; the most twisted philosophy since the strangulation/hashish hookup of the Thuggees in India.
RossInDetroit
This bit is awesome. If it could be distilled to a bumper sticker I’d buy a thousand. Too many words, though, so it will go unnoticed by most.
nancydarling
I think it was Molly who said that being governor of Texas qualified you to be the lieutenant governor.
For news of fracking and water, check this link:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/43443146/ns/business-us_business#
JPL
S. cerevisiae @ 19.. I read a few rumors years ago. One of Kay Bailey Hutchinson’s aides tried to broach the subject and it was treated as dirty politics trying to hurt the good christian.
also, too.. wink, wink, it’s okay if you are a repub
Villago Delenda Est
Easy.
George W. Bush, Rick Perry.
All the justification any deity could ever want for punishing Texas.
Josie
@S. cerevisiae #19: That has always been the gossip, but I have never seen any proof or specificity.
Maybe we should keep the fact that Perry is a nincompoop to ourselves so that the Republicans will actually nominate him. If all the horrible things he has done in Texas come to light plus the aversion many people have to Texas politicians (I wonder why), running against him would be a piece of cake.
Linda Featheringill
Rumor of Perry’s gay past:
http://gawker.com/5327245/kay-bailey-hutchisons-seo-says-rick-perry-is-gay
Not definitive, but out there.
Linda Featheringill
Also, Google “rick perry gay” and find quite a bit of stuff.
JPL
Perry will win a he said, he said argument. Now pictures would be a game changer.
Lolis
I live in Texas and I saw a poll that showed Perry was only five points higher than Obama for job approval. For Texas, those are god awful numbers for Rick Perry.
Dennis SGMM
If Perry runs the media won’t cover the facts; that many of the jobs created are low/minimum wage, or that Texas is $27Bn in the hole, etc., etc. Nope, the myriad voices of adulation for Serious Republicans will trumpet “Job creation!” and “Lower Taxes!” The media no longer lets facts get in the way of a good story and one of the best is a horse race for the presidency. The Republican candidate this time around will get a turd polishing of epic proportions.
azlib
I lived in Texas for 37 years until I moved about 11 years ago. Fortunately, I lived in Austin which is comparatively a liberal oasis in a sea of deep Red. But I did get to see the workings of the legislature and the rest of the government as they came to town every two years. What I found out is the Governor has very little power. It is the Lt. Governor who is the presides over the Senate where the real power lies. Also since many heads of departments in Texas are elected officials, the Governor ends up having little executive authority.
The long and the short of it is you can be Governor of Texas with little in the way of executive experience or much control over the legislative agenda. So the ‘Pray for Rain” resolution is a perfect metaphor for the power of the Texas Governor.
The Sheriff's A Ni-
Toss George W. Bush, Federal stimulus cash, and the secession comment around Perry’s neck and watch the fucker sink like a stone. But he may come off as less crazy than Bachmann and he’s not Romney, so he’s the newest Obi-Wan to the Village GOP Leias. (This after Huckabee, Daniels, and Christie all left the lightsaber at the cantina.)
jinxtigr
Yeah, but turd polishing is like trying to build a thing out of one pound of concrete.
If you want to build a six inch thing out of one pound of concrete, you’ll get a very tough, solid thing. It’ll be what you expect. It’ll be really hard to break.
If you want to build a three foot thing out of one pound of concrete, you can still say ‘it’s concrete! This thing is tough!’ but you’re stretching it kinda far- there will be weaknesses there, even though it’ll still look like a big concrete thing, unassailable.
If you want to build a ten foot thing out of one pound of concrete- ha! Good luck even getting it to hold together. You’re making it so brittle and fragile that a kid could knock holes in it. It’ll look like a huge concrete thing up to the point that holes get knocked in it, at which point your trick is obvious to any fool.
If you want to build a hundred foot thing out of one pound of concrete- don’t even show anybody the thing. It won’t even build, like a Sarah Palin presidency, or Obama being a flaming progressive revolutionary. So many things work against it that you can’t really even pretend, you can only tell a story about the thing you secretly made and how wonderful it is. People who believe you have to believe you on faith alone, you can’t even help them (maybe Photoshop?)
This always happens. Bullshit is traditional, but you simply can’t expand it indefinitely, no matter how eager people are to believe. It’s like a law of physics applied to the social sphere.
maya
Oh noes! Please tell us that won’t affect the iconic Texas HS cheerleader squads?
DZ
@Yutsano:
Oregon’s minimum wage is also $8.50 per hour. You are only tied for the highest
DZ
@Yutsano:
Also, too, long live the forest Republic of Cascadia.
Nellcote
There Will Be Water
Seanly
I can’t believe that 10% minimum wage is the highest percentage in the land. Coz here in SC, seems like all they pay is minimum wage…
handsmile
Contrary to what may appear to be my frequent practice around these parts, I’m not a paid shill for the Guardian newspaper. (I read it daily to be better informed on international events and as a welcome corrective to the crayon-scribbling of press releases that comprises so much U.S. journamalism.)
At the link is their article on the current Justin Bieber (hair so very important!) of the Republican Party and their media enablers:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/jun/19/rick-perry-republican-conference
Do please note the ardent prose recounting Perry’s attributes, both personal and political. Any distaste with This Month’s Flavor is confined to the article’s penultimate paragraph.
At Booman’s place, he has written a thoughtful piece detailing the prospects of a brokered 2012 Republican convention. It resonates with my own belief that the eventual nominee will not have suffered through the attritional warfare of the primary campaign.
A White (in all senses) knight to save the GOP will be summoned by public acclaim, a romance fable to make the Villagers swoon. Christie/Rubio is the ticket I fear the most.
Yutsano
I realized after posting and edit time I was off by a digit: it’s $8.55, and virtually guaranteed to go up this year. But yeah, I’m still waiting for the flood of businesses to go screaming to another state. Oh also forgot: no lower wage scales for tip earners either. EVERYONE gets at least $8.55 period.
srv
As the state cuts funding, the counties are getting hammered. When I was back a month ago, people were running around screaming about 20% raises in their property appraisals. On houses they can’t sell. With county commissioners and assessors who are all Republican.
I’ve given up trying to be polite and not laughing in their faces.
AAA Bonds
Rick “Rainmaker” Perry?
I can’t see him.
He’s in the dead zone . . .
Hawes
I’ve felt for a few months now that Perry would be the White Knight candidate for the right wing of the Right Wing.
And if the Texas/petro money came to him, he could challenge Romney.
But part of my hope for that was because Perry is the National version of Sharrrrron Angle. I think he can credibly take on Romney for the nomination, but he gets crushed in the general.
And I think he knows that, too.
AAA Bonds
I mean did anyone else read that book because Jesus fucking Christ
James E. Powell
@ Davis X. Machina
I think you are dead on with the inner peasant analysis. But add to it the American cult of the individual. Every one of us is brought up to believe that each of us is responsible for our economic circumstances. The notion that we have things in common that we ought to address in common is anathema.
This weekend on CSPAN2, an author of a book on FDR and the New Deal talks at length about how hard it was, even in the depths of the Great Depression, to sell the ideas that we are all in this together and that the rich have different interests from the rest of us.
JustBeingPedantic
@Yutsano
The minimum wage in the state of Washington is all the way up to $8.67.
bryanD
The active ingredient in any Rick Perry 2012 presidential contendership boogaloo is gross liberal naivete regarding political topography.
Why, just whallago Perry was notorious among Texas conservatives for his support of the NAFTA Superhighway and European-owned toll roads and concomitant eminent domain issues attached to these involving veterans’ state parks, cemeteries, Baptist girls’ homes, and so on.
It got so bad, that Perry had to retreat behind a crazy ghost-written Boy Scouts of America book to show that he wasn’t a fucking comanchero.
catmandoodo
Where is Molly Ivins when we need her the most–she could deflate that windbag is three paragraphs or less
booda
Watching this burst of Perry-mania happen in the national media is really bizarre from the perspective inside Texas. Nobody really likes Rick Perry here. Not even Republicans. A large portion of the population just will not EVER pull the lever for a Dem – even if he/she is clearly the superior candidate. Perry keeps getting re-elected by default – nobody else wants the crappy job of gov except Dems, and they only want it to prove that Democrats exist in this state.
Most of my family here are hardcore Limbaugh conservatives and, therefore, are naturally immune to facts even when they impact their lives directly. My mother is going broke trying to care for an elderly aunt while the state pols try to slash Medicare and Medicaid that she desperately needs. Yet, she listens to Rush, sings the praises of Ayn Rand, and is an enthusiastic member of the Paul Ryan fan club. No logic can penetrate the fog of rabid liberal-hate.