The Pope:
“I would not speak at this moment about homosexuality, but pedophilia which is another thing. And we would absolutely exclude pedophiles from the sacred ministry.”
“Who is guilty of pedophilia cannot be a priest,” he added.
The Pope said church officials were going through the seminaries that train would-be priests to make sure that those candidates have no such tendencies. “We’ll do all that is possible to have a strong discernment, because it is more important to have good priests than to have many priests.”
In other news, John McCain promises we will not torture Americans.
4tehlulz
Sadly, among the Opus Dei crowd, separating homosexuality and pedophilia is considered radical.
Jay B.
I hope he unveils the Church’s Pro-Puppy agenda next.
jake
Hey there now Mr. Cole. Are you suggesting Pope EggsBenedict is simply mouthing pious platitudes in an attempt to ward off another round of very expensive lawsuits?
All right then.
Let the alarms ring out through wingnuttia! Summon the Counter Inspection Brigade! The head worshipper of the scarlet woman didn’t lump the kw33rs in with the baby rapists!1
And I bet Bill Donohue is frantically insisting that Benny meant the homos are worse.
Blurg. Maybe I’ll work from home this Thursday.
ThymeZone
We will not torture Americans … but foreigners, fuck them. We’ll cut their nuts off and shove them down their throats if we have to, to Save American Lives. Whether they are guilty of anything or not, that’s not important, what’s important is that we use Every Means At Our Disposal to terrorize them into talking.
Am I missing anything? I think we should make sure that John McCain is seen as the Torture Candidate this fall. Clearly, he is the expert on the subject and we should make him the poster boy.
Tim F.
What does McCain think should be the penalty for torturing an American citizen? This not an idle question.
Davebo
A Priest and a Rabbi are sitting on a park bench when a 12 year old boy walks by.
The Priest leans to the Rabbi and says “Do you wanna fuck him?”
The Rabbi says “Out of what?”
Jen
He’s also against the modernized GI Bill.
The debates are going to be a bloodbath.
A one-way bloodbath.
A little like this video depicts.
We grow ’em a little weird down here, but we’re smarter than PA, by golly.
Dave S.
His Holiness’ next statement on this will include his appointment of Cardinal Law to head the relevant task force.
dbrown
It would be nice if the Pope outlined in some detail what the church will do – after trying so hard to hid the problem, that is the least he could do considering his and the previous Pope’s attempt to hide criminal actions. But like bushwhack and bloodly-hands cheney the coward, head’s of state get a pass when it comes to criminal activities.
ThymeZone
Five footer!
Punchy
What the hell does Matt Leinart have to do with the pope?
TheFountainHead
The guy is a Nazi, what do you want from him!!??
The Other Steve
Is it possible that persons who suffer from a sexual predilictions outside society’s norm are not drawn to the church? What I mean is, they themselves know that this is wrong, and they hope that by joining into the church they will rid themselves of these feelings. But the feelings are much stronger than they imagine, and there is no path by which they can get counseling. For to admit you want to fondle little boys would ostracize you as readily as actually commiting the act.
The Other Steve
Did you know George Bush is our first Catholic President?
Kennedy vowed to not listen to the Pope. George is the first President to consider him a higher authority.
DougJ
Not a huge fan of this pope but he came down hard on Legion of Christ for allegations of sexual abuse by its founder (who was also a Francist nut, but that part was okay, I guess).
Zifnab
A shame. It’ll get an idle answer.
jake
I’ve heard this argument before but I don’t know if anyone has ever done a study of pedophiles who have taken orders v. those who have not. I rather doubt it.
But I don’t know what you mean by there’s no way for a priest to get counseling. You’re supposed to scurry along to confession if you have a strong urge to committ a sin and in theory the guy on the other side of the screen will help you wrestle with your demons. The same goes for ostracism. The Church is being sued all over because they didn’t kick these guys out and (preferably) hand them over to the cops. Instead they told the victims to StFu and moved the perp. to a new gig. We call that aiding and abetting. Ostracism it ain’t.
I think it’s better say that the Church’s continued delusion that it can do no wrong makes it attractive to egomanics who think they can do no wrong.
Dennis - SGMM
FWIW, back in my Navy days in the late Sixties, a friend approached and after swearing me to secrecy told me that he was gay. When I asked him what in the hell made him join the Navy he said that he hoped that it would make him more hetero. Shit. At the time, the Navy was so uptight that it would give you a Bad Conduct Discharge if you came in and confessed your gayness – even if you’d never performed any homosexual acts while in the service. I told him to start pretending to pass out on the job. After a lot of testing they released him on a Medical.
g-rant
re: Pope “Eggs” Benedict
Conan O’Brien ca. 2005:
jake
That is so sad for so many reasons. But it’s nice he trusted you.
/Kumbaya moment.
cbear
That’s funny, I never knew Ted Nugent was gay.
Now I wonder what he actually does with all those farm-raised “wild” animals he hunts?
cbear
and the bear said, “You’re not really here to hunt, are you mister?”
Dennis - SGMM
I loved the Navy. I was born and raised in it. That my service would throw away a perfectly good sailor, no matter what, because of his sexual preferences was one of the several reasons that I left at the end of my then-current enlistment.
ed
So, the New Rule is no pedophiles can be priests. Excellent news! Any word about murderers? Can murderers be priests?
Zifnab
Judge not lest ye be labeled and Activist Judge.
Dennis - SGMM
Only if they recant and say twenty-five “Hail Mary’s.”
Michael D.
I would have titled this post:
“The Audacity of Pope”
jake
It’s not so funny because it’s true. Sadly, No! is on the case:
Brachiator
The Pope is dissembling with all the skills of a master rhetorician. Pedophilia is a crime. He is soft-peddling to get around the reasonable demand that offending priests — and those who protected them be prosecuted. Those who continue to stonewall, like Los Angeles Cardinal Mahoney, should be charged with obstruction of justice, and should be forced by papal authorities to co-operate with law enforcement.
Instead, he is sticking to the policy that priests who offend are above the law and can only be dealt with by the Church, not by any secular authority.
I tire of this bullshit, and all of the petty philosophizing over the nature of pedophilia or the tendencies of some who become priests. If it were an ordinary joe who was diddling little boys or girls, would there be as much discussion about counselling as a cure?
John Cole
Or, say cultists on a ranch in Texas?
Krista
Yeah, that’d be giving some people absolute fits, wouldn’t it.
Dennis - SGMM
Someone had to do it:
One Sunday, a priest asked one of the church janitor if he would cover his Confession shift for him — he said it was easy, since he had a sin list inside the booth which listed both sins and penance. The janitor agreed and took the booth early on Sunday morning. Soon people showed up.
“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I have committed adultery.”
“Adultery, eh?” the janitor said. “You sly devil. That’ll be three Hail Mary’s, plus five bucks.”
“Thank you, Father.”
Another person came into the booth. “Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I have embezzled money from work.”
“Embezzlement, eh? Naughty, naughty. That’ll be 5 Hail Mary’s, plus fourteen bucks.””Thank you, Father.” This was easy, the janitor thought. Another person came into the booth.
“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I have committed the sin of oral sex.””Oral sex, huh?” He looked at the list, but didn’t see oral sex there. So, he excused himself to look for help. He found an alter boy hanging out on the steps of the church.
“Excuse me,” the janitor said. “What does Father Matthew give for oral sex?”
“Well,” said the boy, “usually just milk and cookies, but sometimes a Snickers.”
cleek
it’s Waco 2008 !
and this time, they’re dressed like extras from Little House On The Prairie!
r€nato
John McCain would never countenance the torturing of Americans.
First they will be summarily stripped of their citizenship, right before they are waterboarded.
r€nato
How on earth do they do that, short of hooking them up to a penile plethysmograph and showing them pics of nude children?
I can imagine the screening goes something like this:
“The Catholic Church will not tolerate pedophilia under any circumstances whatsoever! Now, those of you who are pedophiles, raise your hands.”
…
“Nobody, eh? Alrighty then…”
bernarda
What is the Pope Benedickhead’s response to priests raping nuns and young girls, particularly in Africa?
http://www.natcath.com/NCR_Online/archives/031601/031601a.htm
http://www.priestsofdarkness.com/nuns.html
bernarda
More on the priests raping nuns stories.
http://www.feminist.org/news/newsbyte/uswirestory.asp?id=5369
Tim C
So, what is the plan for identifying pedophiles in the seminaries? Parades of naked alter boys and see who jumps in first?
r€nato
I think that’s what they call, “Friday”.