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Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Republicans cannot even be trusted with their own money.

People are complicated. Love is not.

People really shouldn’t expect the government to help after they watched the GOP drown it in a bathtub.

Our messy unity will be our strength.

They punch you in the face and then start crying because their fist hurts.

The Giant Orange Man Baby is having a bad day.

I like political parties that aren’t owned by foreign adversaries.

Do we throw up our hands or do we roll up our sleeves? (hint, door #2)

A norm that restrains only one side really is not a norm – it is a trap.

Also, are you sure you want people to rate your comments?

We do not need to pander to people who do not like what we stand for.

Sometimes the world just tells you your cat is here.

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

The unpunished coup was a training exercise.

The most dangerous place for a black man in America is in a white man’s imagination.

The snowflake in chief appeared visibly frustrated when questioned by a reporter about egg prices.

Oh FFS you might as well trust a 6-year-old with a flamethrower.

“When somebody takes the time to draw up a playbook, they’re gonna use it.”

This has so much WTF written all over it that it is hard to comprehend.

Not all heroes wear capes.

Weird. Rome has an American Pope and America has a Russian President.

My right to basic bodily autonomy is not on the table. that’s the new deal.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

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You are here: Home / Archives for 2009

Archives for 2009

If You Blow Yourself Up, I’ll Shoot!

by John Cole|  December 26, 200910:05 am| 57 Comments

This post is in: Clown Shoes

Without a doubt, the dumbest attempt to politicize the event on the plane yesterday that I have seen so far:

clueless

I suppose me might as well impose a death penalty on all suicide bombers, too.

If You Blow Yourself Up, I’ll Shoot!Post + Comments (57)

More “Fiscal Conservatism” from the Budget Hawks

by John Cole|  December 26, 20098:46 am| 79 Comments

This post is in: Assholes, Democratic Stupidity

It never stops:

Landrieu said she would not support the final legislation if negotiators tinkered with the Senate proposal for taxing high-cost insurance plans.

“I can only support a bill if the Cadillac plans are taxed at the level they are in the Senate [bill,]” said Landrieu. “It’s not because I’m thrilled about taxing those plans, which I’m not, but it is the No. 1 cost-containment measure in the bill. It’s what is going to drive costs down over time.”

Nelson said he would not support the final bill if it included the House proposal to impose a tax surcharge on individuals earning more than $500,000 and families earning more than $1 million.

“I’ve already said that would be a deal-breaker,” said Nelson.

Lincoln also said she has great concern. “If it moves very much at all from where we are, it’s going to be hard,” she said.

Shorter blue dogs- it is imperative we tax union workers and others making 60k a year with good benefits, but leave Paris Hilton alone. I’m sure Broder and Hiatt will love this definition of “sacrifice.”

Why do we even have a House? They simply are not co-equal branches.

More “Fiscal Conservatism” from the Budget HawksPost + Comments (79)

Open Thread

by John Cole|  December 26, 20098:21 am| 62 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

Good morning, fellow O-bots. I hope you all have your decoder rings ready, as the message from Obama central should be getting here soon.

Also, Happy Boxing Day.

Open ThreadPost + Comments (62)

The Other Message from the Pope This Christmas

by John Cole|  December 25, 20099:47 pm| 115 Comments

This post is in: Domestic Politics, War on Terror aka GSAVE®

By now you have heard there was an incident on a plane headed to Detroit. I’m not going to speculate about what happened because the reports are all over the place, and I do not want to minimize the seriousness of it, but I will state that I think we all know the kind of media freak-out we are about to have over this event. Peter King and the usual suspects are already running over people to get in front of cameras. With that in mind, I’d like to bring you the other message from the Vatican this holiday:

The Vatican will review its security procedures after a woman jumped a barrier and rushed at Pope Benedict XVI for the second time in two years.

But the Vatican’s top spokesman warned that it was impossible to guarantee 100% security around the pontiff. This time the woman managed to knock the Pope down before being pulled away by guards.

***

Vatican press chief the Rev Federico Lombardi said it was unrealistic to think the Vatican could ensure 100% security for the Pope, considering he was regularly surrounded by tens of thousands of people for his weekly audiences, Masses, papal greetings and other events. “It seems that they intervened at the earliest possible moment in a situation in which ‘zero risk’ cannot be achieved,” he said.

There are no zero risk situations in life for the Pope, and there are none for you, either. I hope our elected leaders keep that in mind.

The Other Message from the Pope This ChristmasPost + Comments (115)

An Old Pet Pic

by John Cole|  December 25, 20097:34 pm| 72 Comments

This post is in: Cat Blogging, Dog Blogging

Scanned some pics of the old Cole pets- one of my projects is to digitize all our old photo albums, but the current scanner is crap, so I will probably do that this summer. At any rate, here is a picture of two of my childhood pets:

ajaxpurrpuff

Ajax was a scruffy mutt I got a week or so before Christmas in 1979. He was a great little dog, although a rotten dog. He could run away and get in the creek in 30 seconds, loved eating spaghetti and getting it all over his whiskers, and would refuse to come if you called unless he was convinced you could see him, which meant that you would find my mom in the yard yelling “AJAX, I SEE YOU.” His nickname was “swampfoot” because he could get get his feet uber filthy in no time.

The cat is the greatest cat who ever lived, named Mr. Purr Puff (my sister Devon named him). He was a big cat, and the most laid back cat ever. He only had a half a tail (as you can see here) because the rest got cut off in a dorm fire escape door. He lived for close to twenty years, mainly because he was the laziest cat to ever live (for the last few years of Purr Puff’s life, my father was fond of saying “All my kids are out of college, I’m close to retirement, and my only goal left in life is to outlive that god damned cat.” You can not tell from this picture, but he was actually bigger than Tunch, but not fat. Wait till I find some pictures of my sister dressing him up in doll clothes.

An Old Pet PicPost + Comments (72)

It’s the Thought That Counts

by John Cole|  December 25, 20097:13 pm| 27 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads

Here is my favorite picture from the Cole family Christmas. Here is my younger sister who is sort of the family diva, and who, much like her older brother and your bloghost, does not have much of an internal monologue or poker face. I believer her fiancee once referred to her as “un-filtered.” At any rate, here is Anne’s reaction to receiving this gag gift from my other sister:

annesneer

My other sister Devon had worn that to an “Ugly Christmas Sweater” party and decided to give it to Anne as a joke. You can see her to the right of the picture laughing.

It’s the Thought That CountsPost + Comments (27)

Open Thread: Seasonal Music

by Anne Laurie|  December 25, 20096:50 pm| 33 Comments

This post is in: Music, Open Threads

Thank you AsianGrrrl for a new and glorious companionable version of my favorite carol:

When advances in teleportation-booth technology permit the Balloon Juice community to get together for the holidays, we can pretend we’ll sound like this. (Hey, I have a very nice singing voice, just no ear for the right pitch.)

We may go out for Chinese food, because the Spousal Unit is lollygagging about taking off for his familial obligations in upper lower Michigan. Please be nice — meaning: no “Little Drummer Boy”.

Open Thread: Seasonal MusicPost + Comments (33)

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