• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

JFC, are there no editors left at that goddamn rag?

The line between political reporting and fan fiction continues to blur.

Not rolling over. fuck you, make me.

Sadly, media malpractice has become standard practice.

The rest of the comments were smacking Boebert like she was a piñata.

Republicans firmly believe having an abortion is a very personal, very private decision between a woman and J.D. Vance.

Let the trolls come, and then ignore them. that’s the worst thing you can do to a troll.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires Republicans to act in good faith.

Washington Post Catch and Kill, not noticeably better than the Enquirer’s.

Republicans don’t lie to be believed, they lie to be repeated.

“In the future, this lab will be a museum. do not touch it.”

Shallow, uninformed, and lacking identity

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

The current Supreme Court is a dangerous, rogue court.

Those who are easily outraged are easily manipulated.

One way or another, he’s a liar.

Republicans: “Abortion is murder but you can take a bus to get one.” Easy peasy.

The lights are all blinking red.

You don’t get to peddle hatred on saturday and offer condolences on sunday.

Celebrate the fucking wins.

Republicans choose power over democracy, every day.

We cannot abandon the truth and remain a free nation.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Mobile Menu

  • Seattle Meet-up Post
  • 2025 Activism
  • Targeted Political Fundraising
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • COVID-19
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2025 Activism
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Elections / Election 2012 / Mike Huckabee and Colonel Mustard. Separated at Birth?

Mike Huckabee and Colonel Mustard. Separated at Birth?

by Tom Levenson|  March 2, 201111:16 pm| 112 Comments

This post is in: Election 2012, Open Threads, General Stupidity

FacebookTweetEmail

Just caught the TPM story on Mike Huckabee’s interview with the loathsome very serious Brian Fischer.

It’s been too long and meeting-packed a day to offer anything terribly substantial, but I gotta say that Huckabee is a at least reliable source of comedy these days.

It seems that the formerly cuddly weight loss advocate/presidential hopeful now concedes that Barack Obama did not actually grow up in Kenya.

Nice to know.

But no matter, says the former-governor-turned-self-parody.  The truth behind the lie misstatement remains.  Obama is an Islamo-fifth columnist untethered from American ways.  Actual quote:

“Most of us grew up going to Boy Scout meetings and, you know, our communities were filled with Rotary Clubs, not madrassas.”

That’s garden variety wingnut these days, of course.

__

But the … how to say it?…special moment in this interview came with Fischer’s diagnosis of the particular strain of anti-American sentiment that Obama, it seems, imbibed at his father’s knee:

…”what got lost in all the shuffle [i.e. the howls of rage and laughter at Huckabee’s Kenya nonsense] was the legitimate point that you were making is that we may have a president who has some fundamentally anti-American ideas, that may be rooted in a childhood where he had a father who was virulently anti-colonial, hated the British.”

Fischer then checked with Huckabee to see if  that really was the take-home from his remarks.

__

Yes indeedy replied the (almost, sorta) candidate: “Well, that’s exactly the point that I make in the book.”

__

You know who else was pretty virulently anti-imperialist, and did his best to get shut of the Brits?

John Adams, for one. (And/or insert favorite founding father here)

Morans.

Image:  George Stubbs, Soldiers of the 10th Dragoons, 1793

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « In The Annapolis Area?
Next Post: One percent doctrine »

Reader Interactions

112Comments

  1. 1.

    MikeJ

    March 2, 2011 at 11:20 pm

    I think if you asked my great great (x some number great) grandadday who fought at Cowpens his opinion of British colonialism he might have lined up with Obama’s dad, or the Obama’s dad in Huckleberry’s head.

  2. 2.

    General Stuck

    March 2, 2011 at 11:22 pm

    more testament the goopers got nothing but feeding off the trog tea tards and their padres from hell.

  3. 3.

    Rick Massimo

    March 2, 2011 at 11:23 pm

    Um, Mr. Huckabee? Mr. Fischer?

    THE PRESIDENT IS BLACK. HE’S BLACKITY BLACK BLACK. HA HA HA HA HA YES HE IS SUCK ON THAT.

    OK, thanks.

  4. 4.

    MattR

    March 2, 2011 at 11:25 pm

    @Rick Massimo: I’ve posted it before, but I am pretty sure this is all that the wingers hear when Obama speaks.

  5. 5.

    hildebrand

    March 2, 2011 at 11:27 pm

    And this is why Huckabee was not dismissed from Fox, as after this particular little faux pas, he will need his cushy gig for quite some time. Not ready for prime time, indeed.

  6. 6.

    Gina

    March 2, 2011 at 11:28 pm

    I wish my Patriot ancestor, Darius Daggett, would come alive again to bitch-slap that Huckleberry.

  7. 7.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 2, 2011 at 11:29 pm

    @MattR: Thanks for re-posting that. I like it.

    Ahem.

    Dear Mr. Huckabee,

    You do know this country was founded by revolution against the imperialistic Brits, right? Of course you do. You’re just a lying sack of shit who is pandering to the batshitcrazy in your party so you can win the primary, only to be thoroughly trounced by the Kenyan usurper son of a rebel-against-the-imperialistic-Brits Islofacist BLACK MAN in the actual 2012 presidential campaign.

    I request that you go to hell.

    Sincerely,

    asiangrrlMN (with rusty pitchfork in hand)

  8. 8.

    sfinny

    March 2, 2011 at 11:32 pm

    Well I couldn’t satisfy Huckabee’s requirements. In fact, I have been looking for my birth certificate for a couple of months. It was always kept in the same place, but while cleaning up my life, apparently I moved it. Anyways, the certificate itself does not include any of the information that others claim are required to run for president. If I recall correctly the birth certificate had my footprints, my name and time of birth, and nothing else.

  9. 9.

    Reader of the Most Depressing Blog Evah, Formerly Known as Chad N Freude

    March 2, 2011 at 11:33 pm

    I am somewhat bemused by the equation of anti-British with anti-American. (I would be somewhat amused if Huckabee’s audience had any critical thinking skills, but I believe that they don’t.)

  10. 10.

    J

    March 2, 2011 at 11:33 pm

    well I suppose there is the germ of a very bad point in there. The ‘Americans’ who fought against the British in the American Revolutionary war were (predominantly) British North Americans. If, contrary to fact Obama learned anti-colonialism at the knees of his father (about whose views I know nothing–and I certainly don’t want to assume that the wingnuts are right even about them), then his anti-British views might not be analogous to those of John Adams, but rather the dread hatred of white people, which is as we all know is the worst and most virulent form of racism and the one that has had the most terrible consequence throughout history (an outlook which Obama has, with diabolical cleverness, kept hidden through his entire life). whatever.

  11. 11.

    soonergrunt

    March 2, 2011 at 11:34 pm

    Off topic, but funnier than hell
    Sex Toy Demo At University Class Questioned

    Did a Northwestern University human sexuality professor go too far when he held an optional live-sex presentation on campus grounds?
    …
    On Feb. 21, Prof. John Michael Bailey, a psychology professor known for pushing the envelope, invited students from his human sexuality class to observe a non-student naked woman being stimulated with a motorized sex toy on stage, NBC station WMAQ reported.
    …
    About 120 students attended the demonstration, which was curated by Chicago sex tour guide Ken Melvoin-Berg, according to the Northwestern Daily student newspaper.
    …
    The session was billed as a question-and-answer session about fetishes with a demonstration at the end, said Pratik Shah, a senior math and economics student. Students were warned of the nature of the class several times, and some walked out before the demonstration.
    …
    “Then, just out of nowhere, the girl just takes her pants off, takes her shirt off, takes her underwear off,” Shah said.

    When you read the comments on the story on MSNBC, you will no doubt come to the conclusion that the people who are upset about the whole thing are the ones you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place.

  12. 12.

    Elisabeth

    March 2, 2011 at 11:34 pm

    @hildebrand:

    Interesting that possible GOP candidates Gingrich and Santorum can no longer appear on FNC but Huckabee can still have a show.

  13. 13.

    jl

    March 2, 2011 at 11:37 pm

    Franklin and Jefferson are good examples too, those radical Frenchie lovers!

  14. 14.

    Mark S.

    March 2, 2011 at 11:37 pm

    So people are supposed to like being colonized now?

    I can’t believe how racist this whole fucking thing is. What Huckabee (and Gingrich and D’Souza) are basically arguing is that these spearchuckers are unfit to rule themselves and should be kissing the ground white people walk on for being so nice and “civilizing” them.

  15. 15.

    MattR

    March 2, 2011 at 11:37 pm

    @sfinny: I just dug out my birth certificate from NY. It has my name, sex, DOB, birth city, parents name, date of issuance and the signature of the “Registrar of Vital Statistics”. That is it.

    My Presidential aspirations are screwed anyway because I have Canadian citizenship through my mother.

  16. 16.

    guckertgannon

    March 2, 2011 at 11:38 pm

    It’s been too long and meeting-packed a day

    Oh, the anonymity of the intertubes…I never imagined you as a meat packer…

  17. 17.

    General Stuck

    March 2, 2011 at 11:40 pm

    @soonergrunt:

    a motorized sex toy on stage,

    This is so modern, I am disappointed my college, all five of them, didn’t offer such a course. Gives a whole nuther meaning to the Energizer Bunnie banging that drum.

  18. 18.

    jl

    March 2, 2011 at 11:41 pm

    And Hamilton, our most Brit friendly founder was a big federal government, national industrial policy man, who did not believe unregulated free markets by themselves would lead to a decent society that gave all the citizens an opportunity to fulfill their potential.

    But, whatever.

    I guess by Huckabee’s line of thinking we should protect America and our precious youth from the baleful influence of Adams, Franklin and Jefferson. And ignore all the parts of Hamilton he doesn’t like.

  19. 19.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 2, 2011 at 11:42 pm

    @soonergrunt: Cool. Wish I had that class when I was in college.

    @MikeJ: You winz!

    @jl: There you go with your FACTS again. Way to ruin a perfectly good talking point.

  20. 20.

    Reader of the Most Depressing Blog Evah, Formerly Known as Chad N Freude

    March 2, 2011 at 11:43 pm

    @General Stuck: Both of those sentences are excessively funny. You have no idea how much it galls me to tell you that.

  21. 21.

    MikeJ

    March 2, 2011 at 11:43 pm

    @soonergrunt:
    Dear MSNBC,
    I attend a large midwestern university. I always thought your stories were made up until one day when I went to class…

  22. 22.

    soonergrunt

    March 2, 2011 at 11:44 pm

    @sfinny: That’s probably the hospital certificate. It’s suitable for framing, but not worth anything else.
    Your bureau of vital statistics has the important one.

  23. 23.

    Mark S.

    March 2, 2011 at 11:44 pm

    @hildebrand:

    Not ready for prime time, indeed.

    I’m not sure he’s ever been ready for prime time. I’ve read a lot of bloggers and commenters say they’re worried about him because he’s the only gooper who doesn’t have absolute, total contempt for the poor, but I think Obama would clean his clock.

  24. 24.

    soonergrunt

    March 2, 2011 at 11:44 pm

    @MikeJ: :)

  25. 25.

    jl

    March 2, 2011 at 11:45 pm

    @General Stuck: By motorized sex toy, do they mean a machine, or her boyfriend on a skateboard with a little motor?

    The linked story has no pix, not that I am disappointed or anything by that.

  26. 26.

    Reader of the Most Depressing Blog Evah, Formerly Known as Chad N Freude

    March 2, 2011 at 11:47 pm

    You all have it all wrong. The Founding Fathers (note that there were no Founding Mothers) all loved the British. Their views have been distorted by Liberal Historians to indoctrinate our children with subversive anti-American views to further the nefarious Liberal Agenda.

  27. 27.

    soonergrunt

    March 2, 2011 at 11:47 pm

    @MikeJ: I’m still laughing over here.
    That’s a win.

  28. 28.

    MikeJ

    March 2, 2011 at 11:48 pm

    @jl: Kink.com has done amazing things with a sawzall and a dildo.

    Having sawed down walls with a blade attached to one (dildos don’t go through 2x4s well), if I were a woman there is no way on earth I’d let one of those near my hoo-ha.

  29. 29.

    soonergrunt

    March 2, 2011 at 11:52 pm

    @MikeJ: Don’t let them anywhere near an impact driver or a rotary hammer then.

  30. 30.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 2, 2011 at 11:53 pm

    @MikeJ: As a woman with aforementioned hoo-ha, OUCHIE! What the hell? Why the hell would one need a dildo with a saw blade attached to it?

    @soonergrunt: Neither of those caused me to wince like the saw blade image in my head.

  31. 31.

    General Stuck

    March 2, 2011 at 11:54 pm

    @jl:

    The linked story has no pix,

    consider it theater of the mind. x rated

  32. 32.

    Thoughtful Black Co-Citizen

    March 2, 2011 at 11:57 pm

    I can’t wait until Tea Bagger gatherings are 50% Union Jack hoisters and 50% Gadsden flag wavers and the people in patriot fetish gear walk arm-in-arm with those in Red Coat drag.

    Of course, God will smack America off the globe for being too fucking silly. But it’ll be worth it.

  33. 33.

    Stefan

    March 2, 2011 at 11:58 pm

    …”what got lost in all the shuffle [i.e. the howls of rage and laughter at Huckabee’s Kenya nonsense] was the legitimate point that you were making is that we may have a president who has some fundamentally anti-American ideas, that may be rooted in a childhood where he had a father who was virulently anti-colonial, hated the British.”

    You know who else was virulently anti-colonial?

    The Founding Fathers. Hey, I’m just sayin’….

    And when exactly in the wingnut mind did it become “anti-American” to hate the British? Man, if that’s the case then I know a hell of a lot of anti-American Irish-Americans….

  34. 34.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:01 am

    “Then, just out of nowhere, the girl just takes her pants off, takes her shirt off, takes her underwear off,” Shah said.

    I have seen girls do this before. It usually doesn’t happen “just out of nowhere” but rather takes some time, what with all the buttons and buckles and zippers and whatnot to undo. There’s usually plenty of time for me to turn around and avert my eyes…..

  35. 35.

    MikeJ

    March 3, 2011 at 12:03 am

    @asiangrrlMN: There’s no actual saw blade attached when the models do their thing, but there is a 15 amp reciprocating saw motor driving the sex toy. Which would be like doing all of Led Zep at their prime at the same time times about 37.2.

  36. 36.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:03 am

    As a woman with aforementioned hoo-ha, OUCHIE! What the hell? Why the hell would one need a dildo with a saw blade attached to it?

    No no no. It doesn’t have a saw blade. I’d offer a link to a video, but this is a family blog.

  37. 37.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 3, 2011 at 12:04 am

    @Stefan: But why would you do that?

    Shit. Now I have to look.

    @MikeJ: OK. Reading this is enough. I get the picture. Still, ouch. (I’m relieved that there is no blade).

  38. 38.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:06 am

    There’s no actual saw blade attached when the models do their thing, but there is a 15 amp reciprocating saw motor driving the sex toy.

    God, I’m really going to miss stuff like that when civilization collapses and we’re all back to living in caves….

  39. 39.

    Nellcote

    March 3, 2011 at 12:06 am

    Most of us grew up going to Boy Scout meetings

    FWIW, Boy Scouts is an international organization. They even have them in Indonesia. You know who else was a boy scout? Prez Obama that’s who.

  40. 40.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 12:06 am

    You know who else didn’t care much for the British?

    The Founding Fathers, who fought a revolution against them.

    On edit: Looks like I owe Stefan a refreshing fizzy beverage!

  41. 41.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:07 am

    But why would you do that?

    Duh, so they can’t steal my precious bodily fluids, obviously.

    Seriously, if you have to ask….

  42. 42.

    Thoughtful Black Co-Citizen

    March 3, 2011 at 12:09 am

    @MikeJ: I actually saw a News of the Weird article involving an … um … improperly modified sawsaw and a trip to the ER …

    OK, this is making ME feel unwell.

  43. 43.

    TaMara (BHF)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:09 am

    Wait, I’m confused. Mike Huckabee is doing Col. Mustard with a chainsaw dildo?

  44. 44.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 12:11 am

    @Mark S.:

    I can’t believe how racist this whole fucking thing is. What Huckabee (and Gingrich and D’Souza) are basically arguing is that these spearchuckers are unfit to rule themselves and should be kissing the ground white people walk on for being so nice and “civilizing” them.

    At least Huckabee and Gingrich are white guys. D’Souza is your classic house negro type…a lover of his colonial masters, being an immigrant from India, where he grooved on the Raj and probably thought Gandhi was a commie-pinko fag or something.

  45. 45.

    General Stuck

    March 3, 2011 at 12:12 am

    @TaMara (BHF):

    This thread was hijacked by educational pRon. Instead of wingnut baby jeevus pRon. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference, but I know it when I see it.

  46. 46.

    sfinny

    March 3, 2011 at 12:12 am

    @@soonergrunt: But this certificate has been enough to get enrolled in college, get a passport, get a job. This was sufficient to get through any examination to date, but that has been more than twenty years ago. Could I make it through a check today? Don’t know.

  47. 47.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:12 am

    Shit. Now I have to look.

    There may be a website which may have a name that rhymes with something like, oh, say, duckingmachines.com….

  48. 48.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:13 am

    @MikeJ:

    Stealin’ my material….

  49. 49.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason (formerly frosty)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:13 am

    @MikeJ: We see what you did there.

  50. 50.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:14 am

    On edit: Looks like I owe Stefan a refreshing fizzy beverage!

    Eh, pay it forward.

  51. 51.

    PhoenixRising

    March 3, 2011 at 12:14 am

    @TaMara (BHF): Yeah, my guess is that Col. Mustard is doing Mike Huckabee in the Drawing Room with a Sawsall.

    Now let’s see which cards are in the envelope…

  52. 52.

    El Cid

    March 3, 2011 at 12:15 am

    I hate to keep having to mention this, but FDR and Churchill read out the Atlantic Charter during WWII which specifically advocated self-determination for all peoples — roughly 3 months before the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.

    …[The US and UK] respect the right of all peoples to choose the form of government under which they will live; and they wish to see sovereign rights and self government restored to those who have been forcibly deprived of them…

    In other words, anti-colonialism.

    (Churchill never signed it, anyway.)

    And since when did it become some sort of patriotic American behavior to support British colonial policies in Kenya?

  53. 53.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 3, 2011 at 12:16 am

    @Stefan: Suckingmachines? Truckingmachines? Pluckingmachines? I’m not getting it! (Sadly).

    @General Stuck: Well, Huckabee’s stupidity was easily dealt with in the first few comments. We have to amuse ourselves somehow for the rest of the thread!

  54. 54.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:16 am

    Did a Northwestern University human sexuality professor go too far when he held an optional live-sex presentation on campus grounds?

    Or, some say, did he not go far enough?

    Well, we’re gonna have to leave it there. Join us tomorrow when our guests are….

  55. 55.

    The Dangerman

    March 3, 2011 at 12:16 am

    @soonergrunt:

    Sex Toy Demo At University Class Questioned

    I’ll see your sex toy and raise you a sex robot:

    http://www.newtimesslo.com/news/5698/do-the-robot/

    They are, um … they will be here soon.

  56. 56.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:17 am

    No, no, it’s pluckingmachines. Right the third time.

    The things they do to those chickens….*shudder*

  57. 57.

    MikeJ

    March 3, 2011 at 12:18 am

    What’s amazing is how many of you recognized the trope I utilized in my dear MSNBC comment. You wouldn’t recognize it if you were all a buncha perverts.

    My people.

  58. 58.

    El Cid

    March 3, 2011 at 12:18 am

    @Mark S.: Those Kikuyu didn’t know how to use all those rich farmlands in the highlands anyway. The UK was doing them a favor by encouraging them to do other things than farm.

  59. 59.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:18 am

    They are, um … they will be here soon.

    And I, for one, welcome our new sex robot overlords…..

  60. 60.

    scav

    March 3, 2011 at 12:19 am

    @Thoughtful Black Co-Citizen:

    I can’t wait until Tea Bagger gatherings are 50% Union Jack hoisters and 50% Gadsden flag wavers and the people in patriot fetish gear walk arm-in-arm with those in Red Coat drag.

    Gotta adjust those stats slightly to include the fine true patriotic love-it-or-leave-it contingent flying the Stars and Bars.

    Of course, God will smack America off the globe for being too fucking silly. But it’ll be worth it.

    Agreed, although the competition is fierce in this category.

  61. 61.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason (formerly frosty)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:21 am

    @PhoenixRising: Bestest comment today. @MikeJ: Yeah, my wife and I used to do responsive readings from those columns right after we got married. Those were the days.

  62. 62.

    El Cid

    March 3, 2011 at 12:22 am

    @The Dangerman: Is Awesome-O fully functional?

  63. 63.

    Temporarily Max McGee (soon enough to be Andy K again)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:23 am

    @MikeJ:

    Again, I’ve used it here in the past. I went way beyond the intro, too…And in the voice of B.O.B., swinger and secret agent. Two Derby days ago, iirc.

  64. 64.

    Chris

    March 3, 2011 at 12:26 am

    Listen my children and you shall hear
    Of the midnight ride of Paul Revere,
    On the eighteenth of April, in Seventy-five;
    Hardly a man is now alive
    Who remembers that famous day and year.

    He said to his friend, “If the British march
    By land or sea from the town to-night,
    Hang a lantern aloft in the belfry arch
    Of the North Church tower as a signal light,–
    One if by land, and two if by sea;
    And I on the opposite shore will be,
    Ready to ride and spread the cheer
    Through every Middlesex village and tree,
    For the country folk to be up and make tea!”

  65. 65.

    techno

    March 3, 2011 at 12:27 am

    @Stefan:
    Hey it is not just the Irish-Americans who hate the Brits, there are a bunch of German-Americans who feel the same way. And the reason this is interesting is because those two groups are the largest ethnic minorities in USA.

    That this fact was trumped by British intelligence who managed to stampede USA into fighting WW I on their side may still be the most amazing propaganda triumph of all times.

  66. 66.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 3, 2011 at 12:28 am

    @El Cid: No, no, no. Your shtick is to mimic the ‘baggers with eerie precision that causes me to banish you to the virtual couch before hauling out the Communalis and dragging you back to bed. Get it right!

  67. 67.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 12:28 am

    @El Cid:

    (Churchill never signed it, anyway.)

    Because Churchill didn’t have a problem with the concept of colonial oppression, just the fact that the Germans were trying to horn in on the Brits’ action.

  68. 68.

    Stefan

    March 3, 2011 at 12:31 am

    Hey it is not just the Irish-Americans who hate the Brits, there are a bunch of German-Americans who feel the same way. And the reason this is interesting is because those two groups are the largest ethnic minorities in USA.

    Hey, I’m German-Irish. I have the best of both worlds — the easy lyrical wit of the Germans combined with the sober practicality of the Irish.

  69. 69.

    freelancer

    March 3, 2011 at 12:39 am

    @PhoenixRising:

    Yeah, my guess is that Col. Mustard is doing Mike Huckabee in the Drawing Room with a Sawsall.
    Now let’s see which cards are in the envelope…

    Dan Savage won the game.

  70. 70.

    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason (formerly frosty)

    March 3, 2011 at 12:39 am

    @Stefan: LOL. That’s better than my favorite description of Washington DC: A city with Northern charm and Southern efficiency.

  71. 71.

    techno

    March 3, 2011 at 12:40 am

    @Stefan:

    Hey, I’m German-Irish. I have the best of both worlds—the easy lyrical wit of the Germans combined with the sober practicality of the Irish.

    I have never heard that one. VERY funny!!

    Know plenty of Germans–not so many Irish. The Germans I know keep their opinions about being German to themselves–unless you make the mistake of passing them in their Audi A8s. The Irish on the other hand, however few I know, have been extremely colorful in their denunciation of all aspects of the Empire.

  72. 72.

    El Cid

    March 3, 2011 at 12:49 am

    @Villago Delenda Est: Churchill had a bit more of a problem with the concept of not having colonial oppression.

  73. 73.

    Joel

    March 3, 2011 at 1:05 am

    Considering that the republicans are the intellectual (using the term loosely) descendants of the Tory loyalists, Huckabee’s views are not too surprising…

  74. 74.

    J

    March 3, 2011 at 1:07 am

    @El Cid: “And since when did it become some sort of patriotic American behavior to support British colonial policies in Kenya?”

    Everything becomes clear when you realize that

    British = white

    Kenyan = black

    Anticolonial struggle of Kenyans against British = Black people who don’t know their place attacking their white betters

  75. 75.

    El Cid

    March 3, 2011 at 1:19 am

    @asiangrrlMN: I guess this is the kind of thing you say when you’re eatin’ all a bunch of ‘arugula’ and other for’n food and talkin’ about ‘oh I need Obama to give me money’ and such. I guess I’m ‘bitter’! Well, if I got to sleep on a couch, it’s a buncha damn better than sleepin’ in a China-owned gutter!

  76. 76.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 1:36 am

    @J:

    Of course, it’s lost on the Mike Huckabees of the world that the Kenyans were there first, in Kenya.

    Sort of like how the Mike Huckabees of the world really enjoy Red Dawn (“because we LIVE here!”) but don’t quite see how “Iraqi Insurgents” roughly translates into Arabic as “Woverines!”

  77. 77.

    asiangrrlMN

    March 3, 2011 at 1:41 am

    @El Cid: There he is! There’s the skeery Lipton Tea ‘Bagger I fake-married! Time for some sweet, anti-sockulist lovin’!

    @Villago Delenda Est: There you go again with your history and shit.

  78. 78.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 1:43 am

    Marine officer walks up to an Iraqi farmer.

    “Have you seen any foreign fighters in the area?”, he asks.

    The Iraqi farmer looks at him and says, “Yes, I have.”

    “Really, where abouts?”

    “Right in front of me.”

  79. 79.

    Yutsano

    March 3, 2011 at 1:52 am

    @freelancer: He is a sick sick sick man. And I’d still do him if he weren’t married. Wanker.

  80. 80.

    newhavenguy

    March 3, 2011 at 1:56 am

    Good god, it’s not even funny anymore. (and me, an atheist.)

    My mother was upset at me the other day for comparing Roger Ailes to Goebbels. And no, mom, I don’t mean to minimize the Holocaust by any means. This sort of thing is what scares the shit out of me.

    I don’t think for a moment that even in the worst Bush years we had become a “fascist” country, but I’d be a fool not to recognize some of the resonant political themes— national rebirth, enemies within and without, faith and will over mealy-mouthed liberal rationality, etc.

    Maybe I misread Robert Paxton badly, or else the American Right is 90% there— the only essential element missing (so far) is the violence, the heads getting beat every day by Real American Patriots, perhaps in brown uniforms. To date it has been mostly rhetoric, but my, what rhetoric it is.

    Throw in the American Curse, our own race hate thing, and it reminds me of those old Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups commercials— “Hey! You got your racism in my fascism!”

    Not to worry: it tastes great! Good to see Fuckabee’s on board. He seems like a nice guy who you could have a beer with, and maybe trade some funny jokes about welfare, cotton and certified mail. (wink wink dog whistle)

    Lunacy, racism and authoritarianism ascendant together in America. What could possibly go wrong?

  81. 81.

    Villago Delenda Est

    March 3, 2011 at 1:59 am

    @asiangrrlMN:

    I can’t help it. History Major (with a much better GPA than the pride of the Yale History department, George W. Bush).

  82. 82.

    ppcli

    March 3, 2011 at 2:06 am

    Sorry to be a pedant, but it’s my nature – I think the guy’s name is Bryan Fischer with a “y”.

    Amazing that Fischer guy still has a radio show after posting an article asserting that the genocide of the Native Americans was 100% deserved and proper, because they were not Christian. (And, when he took it down, presumably under pressure from his allies, he stated that he was removing it because America was not yet mature enough to have the important discussion, so it would be a “distraction”. Not granting it was morally off in any way.) Amazing that a presidential candidate would appear on a radio show of someone who would post such a thing. But then these are amazing times.

  83. 83.

    Zuzu's Petals

    March 3, 2011 at 2:12 am

    “Most of us grew up going to Boy Scout meetings and, you know, our communities were filled with Rotary Clubs, not madrassas.”

    Nice going, Huckster. You’ve just questioned the patriotism of every child of American missionaries, and of military personnel and government workers serving their country overseas.

  84. 84.

    Mark S.

    March 3, 2011 at 2:33 am

    Shorter Ben Smith:

    Sure Huckabee got some details wrong, but his underlying question is an important one: Does our Kenyan president really think blackity-blacks are capable of self-rule? Plus, he was totally liberal in college, being against nuclear warfare and being sympathetic to sub-human Palestinians.

  85. 85.

    JR (not the other JR)

    March 3, 2011 at 3:08 am

    I grew up in a Christian school in Alabama and was taught some pretty anti-colonial and anti-British values. That whole American Revolution thing with the “Redcoats”? Oh, but I see: “British” is a euphemism for “White”. And “most of us.” You know — “us.” Also, too.

  86. 86.

    JR (not the other JR)

    March 3, 2011 at 3:09 am

    I grew up in a Christian school in Alabama and was taught some pretty anti-colonial and anti-British values. That whole American Revolution thing with the “Redcoats”? Oh, but I see: “British” is a euphemism for “White”. And “most of us.” You know — us. Also, too.

  87. 87.

    Ronzoni

    March 3, 2011 at 5:10 am

    @sfinny:

    No

  88. 88.

    bob h

    March 3, 2011 at 5:51 am

    With Tucson in mind, I find any attempt to question Obama’s American-ness and demonize him as the “other” really dangerous and irresponsible. And he is going to be hitting the road big time next year, with numbers of the feeble-minded and violent listening to Huckabee.

  89. 89.

    Ian Preston

    March 3, 2011 at 5:55 am

    Just to be clear, some of us British aren’t ourselves too hot on that colonialism thing any more.

    As we retreat through history, discovering sympathy in certain sectors of American opinion for the losing reactionary side in increasingly distant battles where will this go to next? Divine right of kings? Feudalism?

  90. 90.

    nancydarling

    March 3, 2011 at 6:02 am

    This thread is why I would read this blog even if I didn’t learn stuff.

  91. 91.

    Lancelot Link

    March 3, 2011 at 6:17 am

    @Nellcote:
    FWIW, Boy Scouts is an international organization. They even have them in Indonesia.
    They have Rotary Clubs in Indonesia, too.

  92. 92.

    RSA

    March 3, 2011 at 7:35 am

    One thing I know is because he grew up in Mississippi Arkansas, Governor Huckabee’s view of the place of black people in our society, for example, is very different from that of the average American.

    Some people might say that the views of Governor Huckabee might be rooted in a childhood where he had exposure to virulent racism, even people who hated black people.

    I don’t know. Some of us grew up going to Boys’ Clubs rather than KKK meetings.

  93. 93.

    Hart Williams

    March 3, 2011 at 7:44 am

    Give Huckleberry a break. It’s got to be tough coming out of a dumbass Klan background, being sodomized by Scoutmasters and Rotarians, going all “fat-boy ministery” and then dumping the weight to take the Oprah show diet-book path back to respectability.

    It’s a long long way from bat-shit crazy. Fortunately for Huckleberry Hundt, he’s already saner than his base.

    Most UNfortunately for the rest of us.

    Shorter: fuck him and the bag of Doritos he’s got stashed behind his desk.

  94. 94.

    redoubt

    March 3, 2011 at 7:57 am

    @Villago Delenda Est: Remember, D’Souza used to date Ann Coulter–the whitest woman in America–so that makes him white by definition.

    Also, since D’Souza already covered this, Huckleberry is five months late.

  95. 95.

    rm

    March 3, 2011 at 8:07 am

    What we are not acknowledging here with our elite hair-splitting that regular Americans I think are not in approval of, in Huck’s defense, also, too, is that Kenya and Indonesia are both just provinces of Furrinstan, a dangerous and radical Other Country where Furriners plot against America all day. And Obama definitely spent his entire childhood there being raised by his father in a madrassa.

  96. 96.

    Scott P.

    March 3, 2011 at 8:38 am

    well I suppose there is the germ of a very bad point in there. The ‘Americans’ who fought against the British in the American Revolutionary war were (predominantly) British North Americans.

    It’s worth pointing out that for the last half of the Revolutionary War, approximately 25% of the soldiers in the Continental Army were black.

  97. 97.

    Scott P.

    March 3, 2011 at 8:44 am

    Also, read Larison on the rest of Huckabee’s interview, which shows how full of shit he is:

    http://www.amconmag.com/larison/2011/03/02/huckabees-anti-british-indonesians-and-hawaiian-madrassas/

  98. 98.

    Rick Taylor

    March 3, 2011 at 8:54 am

    I don’t remember Huckabee being this contemptible during the last election. I thought I even remembered him saying something along the lines of he though Obama was a good person who disagreed with. I guess that’s just not good enough if you’re a Republican these days.

  99. 99.

    soonergrunt

    March 3, 2011 at 9:27 am

    @ppcli: Fischer is the same guy that said that Salvatore Giunta, the Soldier who is the first living recipient of the Medal of Honor since the Viet Nam war is a pussy because he got the MoH primarily for risking his own life to save a wounded comrade from enemy capture, and not for primarily killing the enemy.
    The important thing when thinking about Bryan Fischer is not what he says, which is either lame or offensive and usually both, it’s who pays his bills. That would be the American Family Association.

  100. 100.

    Jamie

    March 3, 2011 at 9:41 am

    It’s quite odd to see American Politicians criticizing those who opposed the British Empire. Has anyone told them who the US was rebelling against in the Revolutionary War?

  101. 101.

    chopper

    March 3, 2011 at 9:47 am

    god, huckabee is so much fail. he’s like someone assembled him in a lab from parts of other failures.

    “obama grew up in kenya with an anti-colonial father! wait, what? he didn’t grow up in kenya? well, indonesia then! wait, what? he grew up with his step father? well, he didn’t grow up around rotary clubs and boy scout meetings! wait, what? he only spent a few years in indonesia, and grew up in the US? I’M STILL OUTRAGED!!”

  102. 102.

    WereBear

    March 3, 2011 at 10:10 am

    @soonergrunt: The important thing when thinking about Bryan Fischer is not what he says, which is either lame or offensive and usually both, it’s who pays his bills. That would be the American Family Association.

    So the American Family Association is pro-genocide and pro-oppression?

    Dang. This explains a lot.

  103. 103.

    rikryah

    March 3, 2011 at 11:57 am

    if you aren’t White…and aren’t anti-colonial..

    something is wrong with you.

  104. 104.

    john b

    March 3, 2011 at 12:04 pm

    doesn’t madrassa just mean school?

  105. 105.

    john b

    March 3, 2011 at 12:07 pm

    still in moderation. trying to say:

    “doesn’t madrasa just mean school?”

  106. 106.

    sparky

    March 3, 2011 at 12:13 pm

    hmmm…looks like Hucky messed up his talking points. but then, this IS the intellectual talking point; the um unitary theory of Obama. i am impressed that D’Sousa managed to turn his experiences/outlook in Obama’s with almost no one* noticing. but then i don’t get the R talking points memo.

    maybe next time he can write a book about how Sarah Palin is inside Andrew Sullivan’s head and how good=bad.

    *

    What about his weird instinct to dredge up the irrelevant topic of anti-colonialism in explaining Barack Obama’s run-of-the-mill center-left political agenda? Using the same phrasing:

    If Mr D’Souza hailed from a tiny Westernised elite that allied itself with the European colonialist project against the national independence movement of his own country, that would explain his monomania about anti-colonialism.

    when the Economist is agin you, you might be just right for Missouri.

  107. 107.

    Brachiator

    March 3, 2011 at 12:23 pm

    @Mark S.:

    I can’t believe how racist this whole fucking thing is.

    It’s been that way since day one of Obama entering the primary. Early on, of course, there were the coded claims that Obama was too “exotic,” “aristocratic,” etc.

    But now these clowns have just gone batshit crazy with their racial anxiety. In addition, Hucksterbee is picking up on D’Souza’s sick assimilationist spin. Politicians like Bobby Jindal or Nikki Haley have presumably washed away any traces of anti-colonialist original sin with their embrace of Roman Catholicism and Methodism, respectively, and most of all by their conversion to rock-ribbed Republicanism.

    In short, all this is code for “Obama hates white people, especially god fearing Real American(tm) Christian white people.”

    As a corollary, non white politicians must be able to offer palpable proof that neither they, their family or any ancestor has tainted them with the slightest trait of animosity toward white oppressors now or in the past.

    It’s just sad.

  108. 108.

    joe from Lowell

    March 3, 2011 at 12:32 pm

    Apparently, one’s attitude towards colonialism is genetic.

    How else could Barack Obama have “imbibed” anti-colonialism from a father who left his mother when she was pregnant with him, and visited him once when he was six?

  109. 109.

    Nutella

    March 3, 2011 at 1:39 pm

    @redoubt:

    D’Souza used to date Ann Coulter

    For real? Or is that just a really, really bad joke?

  110. 110.

    Brachiator

    March 3, 2011 at 2:31 pm

    @joe from Lowell:

    Apparently, one’s attitude towards colonialism is genetic. How else could Barack Obama have “imbibed” anti-colonialism from a father who left his mother when she was pregnant with him, and visited him once when he was six?

    These goons love to shuttle between the “Obama has un American values” to “Obama was born a Mooslim or anti-colonialist.” So whether their complaint is based on nature or nurture, they got it covered. And apparently, Obama wasn’t a boy scout, which apparently washes sins away.

  111. 111.

    soonergrunt

    March 3, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    @Nutella: It’s both at the same time.

  112. 112.

    Josh

    March 3, 2011 at 7:54 pm

    DeNewsa is not from the British part of India, though, am I right?

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

On The Road - Albatrossity - The Birds of May 3
Image by Albatrossity (7/31/25)

World Central Kitchen

Donate

Recent Comments

  • scav on The Ongoing Texas Tragedies (Jul 12, 2025 @ 12:30pm)
  • Omnes Omnibus on The Ongoing Texas Tragedies (Jul 12, 2025 @ 12:29pm)
  • prostratedragon on The Ongoing Texas Tragedies (Jul 12, 2025 @ 12:28pm)
  • Elizabelle on The Ongoing Texas Tragedies (Jul 12, 2025 @ 12:28pm)
  • Another Scott on The Ongoing Texas Tragedies (Jul 12, 2025 @ 12:26pm)

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
No Kings Protests June 14 2025

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)
Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Social Media

Balloon Juice
WaterGirl
TaMara
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
DougJ NYT Pitchbot
mistermix

Keeping Track

Legal Challenges (Lawfare)
Republicans Fleeing Town Halls (TPM)
21 Letters (to Borrow or Steal)
Search Donations from a Brand

Feeling Defeated?  If We Give Up, It's Game Over

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!