Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

There’s always a light at the end of the frog.

Hi god, it’s us. Thanks a heap, you’re having a great week and it’s only Thursday!

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

I’m starting to think Jesus may have made a mistake saving people with no questions asked.

It’s pointless to bring up problems that can only be solved with a time machine.

But frankly mr. cole, I’ll be happier when you get back to telling us to go fuck ourselves.

Innocent people don’t delay justice.

Well, whatever it is, it’s better than being a Republican.

Putin must be throwing ketchup at the walls.

Putting aside our relentless self-interest because the moral imperative is crystal clear.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

Second rate reporter says what?

Hot air and ill-informed banter

In short, I come down firmly on all sides of the issue.

Nothing says ‘pro-life’ like letting children go hungry.

Happy indictment week to all who celebrate!

This year has been the longest three days of putin’s life.

The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Let me file that under fuck it.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Jack be nimble, jack be quick, hurry up and indict this prick.

That’s my take and I am available for criticism at this time.

You are here: Home / Foreign Affairs / C.R.E.A.M. Open Thread: Guacamole Lovers, Rejoice!

C.R.E.A.M. Open Thread: Guacamole Lovers, Rejoice!

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Mexico broke into its Strategic Superlatives stockpile, so — as of 6:15am EDT — our imported avocados remain affordable…

For some reason, Democrats (and other sane people) fail to be overawed by the Squatter-in-Chief’s “accomplishment”!

Reader Interactions

136Comments

  1. 1.

    Baud

    Mexico will also offer jobs, healthcare and education according to its principles.

    Why couldn’t Trump negotiate that for Americans? #ArtoftheDeal

  2. 2.

    Baud

    Antes

    Mexico trabajará con los Estados Unidos sobre la problema del migrantes.

    Despues

    Mexico trabajará mucho con los Estados Unidos sobre la problema del migrantes.

  5. 5.

    Steve in the ATL

    This is an historic night! [emphasis added]

    — Chuck Schumer

    In case anyone needed one more reason to dislike Chuck Shumer.

  7. 7.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Steve in the ATL: “A historic is more common in both American and British English, but both usages are sufficiently common to be considered correct.”

  9. 9.

    Mai Naem mobile

    I wouldn’t be surprised that Trumpov being a small man with small ideas pulls this stuff so that his family can make money making bets on the stock market. I.hope there are some people at the SEC watching the trading patterns of Trumpov’s extended families. Also his equally crooked pals at Treasury,DOJ,State and Commerce. I would like these people in prison after 2020 for insider trading.

  11. 11.

    Steve in the ATL

    @Amir_Khalid: I do, in my head, when I read that construction

    @Gin & Tonic: I’m aware, but it’s still pretentious and stupid. Why is that ok but “an house” isn’t not? Makes no sense. It’s stupid. And pretentious.

  12. 12.

    Amir Khalid

    By the way, I just sent my very first user feedback to YouTube. I said, “Hey YouTube, fuck you and your new embedded advertising.”

  13. 13.

    Immanentize

    @Baud:
    “If English was good enough for our Lord and Saviour, it is good enough or the people of Texas”
    — Governor “Ma” Fergusson

  14. 14.

    NotMax

    @Amir Khalid

    If strictly following American English as opposed to British English, Chuck’s name ought to be pronounced SKOO-mer.

    :)

  15. 15.

    germy

    MEXICO HAS AGREED TO IMMEDIATELY BEGIN BUYING LARGE QUANTITIES OF AGRICULTURAL PRODUCT FROM OUR GREAT PATRIOT FARMERS!— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 8, 2019

    There is nothing in the joint declaration about any kind of commitment from Mexico, the 2nd largest market for US ag products, to buy more from American farmers… https://t.co/iNlefs59Vo— Meridith McGraw (@meridithmcgraw) June 8, 2019

  17. 17.

    Amir Khalid

    @NotMax:
    An excellent idea. I nominate his cousin Amy to take up changing the pronunciation of the family name.

  19. 19.

    zhena gogolia

    @germy:

    “Our great patriot farmers”

    He really isn’t shy about sounding like Iosif Vissarionovich Stalin, is he?

  20. 20.

    Amir Khalid

    @germy:
    If Trump says the Mexicans did agree to buy more American produce, then they did too, so there. Pout.

  21. 21.

    zhena gogolia

    @Amir Khalid:

    Do you mean the way the last few seconds of a video are ruined by superimposed ads for another video? I hate that! Is there any way to get rid of it?

  22. 22.

    chris

    @germy: See attached map. There are no shovels big enough for all the bullshit.

    Mexico was the #2 foreign customer for US agricultural products in 2018, according to Trump’s Department of Agriculture, with $19 billion in purchases. pic.twitter.com/rz24WnD2qR— Daniel Dale (@ddale8) 7 June 2019

  23. 23.

    germy

    I didn’t know this about Kamala’s sister:

    Maya Harris was an adviser to Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign and would likely have served in a Clinton administration had she won the White House, Politico reports.

    The Stanford-educated lawyer and progressive activist who became a mom at 17 also headed the American Civil Liberties Union of Northern California and helped edit manuscripts of Michelle Alexander’s best-selling The New Jim Crow about the need for criminal justice reform.

    https://www.theroot.com/family-affair-maya-harris-is-painted-as-the-face-and-p-1835341726

  26. 26.

    germy

    One of the thing that the media has not adjusted to after more than two years of Trump: He is much more likely to lie than tell the truthThere is no evidence that Trump struck a meaningful “deal on migrants”And yet here is the headline pic.twitter.com/BjmDH4ii9u— Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) June 8, 2019

    Trump did the exact same thing with North Korea. He hyped a landmark agreement when the North Koreans agreed to nothing. We’ll see what this “deal” is with Mexico…— Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) June 8, 2019

  27. 27.

    Amir Khalid

    @zhena gogolia:
    I’m seeing a pre-video ad, which I must watch (and listen to) for at least five seconds before the Skip Ad button is activated, the video interrupted twice or more by an ad with a five-second delay on the Skip Ad button, and an ad at the end of the video. I can click away just before the end of the video and avoid the last one, but the others infuriate me.

  32. 32.

    NotMax

    @Amir Khalid

    Never seen an ad of any sort on YouTube. Browser settings adjusted to let through the barest minimum of javascript necessary for a video to show up. With Firefox, that’s setting the NoScript add-on to allow only 2 sources: youtube.com and googlevideo.com.

  33. 33.

    Amir Khalid

    @Amir Khalid:
    While I’m on the subject, has anyone else noticed Internet adertising suddenly becoming much more aggressive of late? It seems that these days every time I fire up the intertubes, Adblock Plus has forgotten all my settings, including my very few whitelisted sites.

  35. 35.

    NotMax

    @Ajabu

    As spouse doesn’t become spice, one could hypothesize there are differing rules for the living versus the inaminate.

    ;)

  37. 37.

    Sab

    @Peking Man: Steve would probably insist on saying “a historic”, which sounds pretentious and awkward to many of us older people.

    Of course I still use a flip-phone.

  39. 39.

    NotMax

    @Amir Khalid

    Can get it here.

    Before Firefox changed to its current Quantum configuration, NoScript was spectacular and a snap to use. Post-Quantum, it is a clunkier interface and has a less flat learning curve but has improved muchly since the initial post-Quantum version.

  41. 41.

    pat

    If you want to get all huffy about “an historic day,” when will we start to make fun of the people right here on this blog who don’t know when to use it’s or its

    Hint: It’s is short for IT IS.

  43. 43.

    tokyokie

    @Immanentize: I usually pronounce “doughnuts” as though the first syllable rhymes with “tough,” but then I usually pronounce the “g” in “diaphragm” and give the “c” in “disciples” a hard pronunciation. And I do all that just to amuse myself by being annoying.

  45. 45.

    NotMax

    @pat

    A handy trick to keep in mind when using the possessive is to remember there is no apostrophe in his or hers, same as there isn’t one for its

  47. 47.

    Wag

    @Steve in the ATL:

    What do you have against proper grammar?

    The sentence constructions is absolutely correct. And it is certainly better than the ahistorical timeline in which we currently find ourselves.

  48. 48.

    Uncle Cosmo

    Worst St. Patrick’s day card I ever saw: Avocado walking down the street wearing a bowler hat with a stupid smile on its Mr-Potato-Head face & a stogie in its fake fingers. Inside caption: How are things in Guacamole?

  50. 50.

    tokyokie

    @Uncle Cosmo: I don’t think I’ve ever seen a St. Patrick’s Day card, but then the greeting-card industry prints cards for all sorts of occasions I don’t recognize.

  51. 51.

    hells littlest angel

    Hey, it’s a SIGNED AGREEMENT! No president has ever, I think, gotten one of those before.

  52. 52.

    germy

    @Sab:

    Steve would probably insist on saying “a historic”, which sounds pretentious and awkward to many of us older people.

    The trick is to leave a dramatic pause between “a” and “historic” (This is a . . . historic day!”)

  53. 53.

    Immanentize

    @pat: That “it’s” versus “its” happens in part because of autocorrect which is always adding apostrophe’s for some unknown reason.

  55. 55.

    Adam L Silverman

    1) The US is required by law to retain asylum seekers and asylees within the US by US statutory law, as well as Senate ratified treaty obligations that have the force of US statutory law. It cannot legally fob them off on a third country as their applications are processed.
    2) Mexico does not currently have the “National Guard” that is referenced in this report. As a result they do not have anyone to actually deploy to their southern border.
    3) We can infer from 1 and 2, that there is no “there, there” with this agreement. Mexico took advantage of the President being ignorant and bought itself 90 days. We’ll see what it does in 90 days.

  58. 58.

    germy

    @Adam L Silverman: The gullible editors of my local newspapers are printing the administration’s version of events. Which means it’ll be repeated on my local TV news.

  62. 62.

    Dorothy A. Winsor

    I’m on Volume 2 of the Mueller Report, and I’m struck again by how much all these people, including the president, lie, even when they have to know their lie will be uncovered. Or maybe they don’t know. Maybe they’re used to living in small worlds without the scrutiny and cross-checking they’re now being subjected to.

  64. 64.

    debbie

    @Steve in the ATL:

    If he were speaking that sentence, I think the “a” would have served as additional emphasis to “historic,” more so than “an” would, but what do i know — I think he’s snarking Trump, but in a way Trump will take as praise.

  65. 65.

    NotMax

    @Amir Khalid

    Whenever people wax enthusiastic over how reliable self-driving cars will be I have a one word response. “Autocorrect.”

    ;)

  66. 66.

    mrmoshpotato

    @germy: Lucky you!

    You have my sympathy. I can’t even stand the teaser commercials for the news.

    “Blah blah blah. You’ll never believe what happened. We investigate tonight at 9.” Oh shut up and get the game back on.

  71. 71.

    SFAW

    @Steve in the ATL:

    In case anyone needed one more reason to dislike Chuck Shumer.

    Schumer.

    And your just pissed because he was doing the pedant thing, and you don’t like the competition.

  72. 72.

    Amir Khalid

    @NotMax:
    I once had a colleague named Kenneth Teh. The first implementation of autocorrect on Microsoft Word, many years ago, would not let him type his surname.

  76. 76.

    SFAW

    @NotMax:

    If strictly following American English as opposed to British English, Chuck’s name ought to be pronounced SKOO-mer.

    Steve in the WTFKWHI fixed that by dropping the “c.”

  77. 77.

    Sab

    @NotMax: Year before last my accounting firm tried to using a scanning program to input data into the tax program. The results were hilarious.

  78. 78.

    Another Scott

    @Ajabu: I don’t know enough French to be even a novice, but …

    Renault
    Peugeot
    Escargot
    Deux
    Eau

    ‘How do you spell the ending “OO” sound in French?’
    ‘Any way you like!!1’

    It’s a good thing they have a bunch of brainiacs keeping the French language pure and consistent!

    ;-)

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  79. 79.

    NotMax

    Hm. Promo now on TCM for Medium Cool this coming Tuesday at 10 p.m. Eastern. A revolutionary act of film making at the time, wonder how (or if) it holds up fifty years on.

    One of those movies which stayed for months at the theater where I was an usher.

  81. 81.

    Sab

    @Another Scott: In Ohio we have a neighboring county, Geauga, pronounced “jee-aw-ghuh.” The national weather alerts pronounce it “go-guh”. Very weird to hear.

  82. 82.

    LC

    @Steve in the ATL:

    It makes perfect sense depending on how you pronounce “historic”. If the h is aspirated, it is going to be “a”. If it isn’t aspirated (because you don’t stress the first syllable for instance) it is going to sound more like a vowel, so you say “an”. It’s not pretentious, it is natural language. Are you against saying “it is an honour”? Do you object to saying an apron?

  84. 84.

    Another Scott

    @Sab: I never knew how to pronounce Bellefontaine, OH until I heard locals do it several times. My brother pronouncing it as if it were French didn’t help. ;-)

    Similarly, one can always tell transplants to the Atlanta area by hearing how they pronounce DeKalb County.

    Here in NoVA there’s a street called “Wythe” named after George Wythe. It’s pronounced “with”.

    Language is weird, especially American English.

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  85. 85.

    JAFD

    Al Sicherman, in his book ‘Caramel Knowledge’, had a reciye for ‘Mockagoule’, replacing the mashed avocado with softened butter.

    Thot I might have to dig it up and post it…

  87. 87.

    Steve in the ATL

    @Amir Khalid: as it should be. And has Patrick Swayze’s attempt at a southern accent in “North and South” been topped yet? Or bottomed, if you prefer.

    @LC: n honour, an apron, an hour all make sense because the initial “h” is not pronounced. In “history”, “historic”, “historian”, et al, the initial “h” is pronounced. Unless you’re Dick Van Dyke.

    @Another Scott: “ou”. As in “beaucoup” or just “où”, which means “where”

  88. 88.

    Kay

    @germy:

    MEXICO HAS AGREED TO IMMEDIATELY BEGIN BUYING LARGE QUANTITIES OF AGRICULTURAL PRODUCT FROM OUR GREAT PATRIOT FARMERS!

    Maybe it’s time for farmers to get their head out of their asses. “Mexico” doesn’t buy anything from them. The country doesn’t purchase agricultural products. Mexico agreed on behalf of large and small purchasers in Mexico to buy “large quantities”? Really? How does that work? Mexico orders purchasers to buy “more”? More than they need and can sell? More than they were planning on buying last Thursday when Trump shot off his mouth?

    If farmers don’t know this is complete and utter nonsense then they should lose their farms.

  89. 89.

    Steve in the ATL

    @Sab:

    In Ohio we have a neighboring county, Geauga, pronounced “jee-aw-ghuh.”

    That’s not far off of how many people in my adopted home state pronounce “Georgia”, though it’s usually closer to “jaw-ja”

  90. 90.

    mrmoshpotato

    @JAFD: Who doesn’t like dipping tortilla chips into a slab of butter?

    “Why is your blood pressure rising as I’m taking it?”
    “I’m think about buttered tortilla chips, Doc.”

  91. 91.

    Kay

    @germy:

    Donald Trump has so deluded our “great” farmers that they now believe the country of Mexico buys their products.

    Is “Mexico” buying cars too? A car per person? Or will they order Mexicans to purchase one each?

  92. 92.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Kay:

    Maybe it’s time for farmers to get their head out of their asses.

    That time was before casting their vote.

  93. 93.

    James E Powell

    @Steve in the ATL:

    It’s neither stupid nor pretentious. It’s just one of a very large number of differences among the English speaking peoples. I grew up hearing people say “an ‘istoric” and “an ‘istorian” so that’s what sounds right to me. I always knew there were differences on this, but this is the first time anyone seemed angry about it.

    @Dorothy A. Winsor:

    I thought it had something to do with history coming from French and house coming from German. Like maybe the “aitches” were pronounced differently or not at all back in the day.

  94. 94.

    Steeplejack

    @germy:

    God, that’s a real Trump tweet. I thought it was something from a spoof account like that DPRK North Korean one.

  95. 95.

    Steve in the ATL

    @Another Scott: you probably know this, but the French language developed when the Romans invaded Gaul. The Gaulois (heh) were too primitive to pronounce the full Latin words so they bailed on the endings.

    Much of the vocabulary and grammar are almost identical to Latin. Par example, the verb “to be”.

    Latin:
    Sum
    Es
    Est
    Sumus
    Estis
    Sunt

    French:
    Je suis
    Tu es
    Il/elle est
    Nous sommes
    Vous êtes (or estes, as the circumflex replace the “s”)
    Ils sommes

    Someone page Omnes to correct any mistakes I may have made.

  96. 96.

    Steve in the ATL

    @James E Powell: it’s a pet peeve; I don’t actually lose any sleep over it.

    And what Americans say “‘istorian” or “‘istoric”? Guests at dinner parties in Cambridge?

  97. 97.

    Kay

    @mrmoshpotato:

    You know, the whole thing is hysterical. People who have spent the last 200 years screaming that they are bootstrapping free marketeers believe THE PRESIDENT can engineer sales of their “products” to a STATE because he said so.
    They have nothing left. They have traded not just their supposed “ideological” beliefs for Dear Leader but everything they know to be true about what they sell and who they sell it to. It’s a cult. They’re cult members.

    He’s going to bankrupt them and they are still following him like zombies.

  103. 103.

    Gin & Tonic

    @Immanentize: My son and his (Mexican) girlfriend were over two weeks ago. Her English is very good (she took an MA in the US) but she must have had a brain fart when she stopped while writing something and asked “does ‘speech’ have an ‘a’?” I said, well “peach” does, so the answer is “no”.

  104. 104.

    scav

    H is where English digs deep and reveals its inner chaos. Line eveyone in the anglophone world up and have them intone “a(n) historic herb”

    I might beware the pronounceation of deux up there. Not that I’ve been to all the regions.

  107. 107.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Kay: Yup. Impossible to dig themselves out now financially or ideologically. Money doesn’t grow on trees, and they’d have to admit to themselves that they got taken for a ride for decades. (Dump’s not responsible for all of the past 40 years of voting against your best interests. But damn if he’s the best GOP conman.)

  108. 108.

    mrmoshpotato

    @NotMax: You’re all ridiculous, and years ago a buddy and I decided the plural of “moose” should be “meese.”

  109. 109.

    Kay

    @mrmoshpotato:

    Oh, you know in a way it doesn’t matter. I watched Chernobyl and what it’s about, to me, is lying. Boom. They could lie all they wanted. It blew up. The reactor doesn’t know or care what they say- it’s a machine. The lies piled up and piled up and then it blew up.

    Maybe Mexico can buy the farms at foreclosure and give them to the refugees, who are not even primarily Mexicans, I don’t think but since we’re lying about everything else I suppose we can lie about that too.

  110. 110.

    mrmoshpotato

    @Kay:

    Maybe Mexico can buy the farms at foreclosure and give them to the refugees

    I’m good with that.

  111. 111.

    Uncle Cosmo

    @tokyokie: Sent me by a woman I’d been on-off pursuing over many years, who’d introduced me to the local Irish pub music scene. Some years before she’d also posted me this valentine:

    Cover: Little doggie clutching big red heart, little hearts fluttering around, Handwritten lengend, Will you be my Valentine?
    Inside: It’s a thankless job, but someone has to do it.

    Considering both source & recipient, one of the more spot-on cards ever sent.

  112. 112.

    sdhays

    @Kay:

    …who are not even primarily Mexicans…

    They all come from “Mexican countries”, so it’s all good.

  113. 113.

    Peale

    @Kay: yep. The chinese government might have the power to order their ag companies where to buy soybeans, but Mexico? Next they’ll pretend that the president made them buy f150 trucks and air conditioners made in Indiana

  114. 114.

    soga98

    @Steve in the ATL:
    Yep Many French words have Latin parallels, eg “comme” as in “comme il faut” with”cum”. Few now realise that “cum grano salis” is “like grains of salt”, ie “sparingly”.

  116. 116.

    Peale

    @Adam L Silverman: maybe they can invite China to build a base and call them the national guard. Or Build one for Iran. Or put six Cubans there. Something might give Bolton a heart attack.

  117. 117.

    Another Scott

    Vicente Fox on Twitter isn’t too happy with Lopez’s “deal”. At least Google Translate’s version says he’s not. Dunno how much of it is politics and how much is Fox bringing up actual problems…

    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Cheers,
    Scott.

  118. 118.

    Aleta

    @germy: but only from the GREAT PATRIOT farmers. Any farmer who’s still hurting? It’s their own fault for insufficent donations of the patriotic kind.

  121. 121.

    Brachiator

    @Another Scott:

    Vicente Fox on Twitter isn’t too happy with Lopez’s “deal”. At least Google Translate’s version says he’s not. Dunno how much of it is politics and how much is Fox bringing up actual problems…

    Even though the Mexican government’s reaction is smart and reasonable, a number of Mexican friends and clients think that Mexico acts as though it is America’s lapdog. They are frustrated and angry at what they see as an unnecessary appeasement of America. In turn, this makes them cynical and fear that the their government will never be able to become strong and truly competent.

    Unfortunately, Trump is not aware of this sentiment, and probably would not care even if he knew, but his tactics work a raw nerve.

    ETA. I don’t know how widespread this sentiment might be among many Mexicans, but I was surprised at how vehement this feeling was among a diverse group of people who have expressed an opinion about these issues, and how similar their responses are.

  123. 123.

    joel hanes

    @Amir Khalid:

    Do people who do that in writing pronounce it “an ‘istoric night”?

    I do, or come awfully close. I shape my mouth for the h, but don’t aspirate to make the sound.

  124. 124.

    LuciaMia

    QUANTITIES OF AGRICULTURAL PRODUCT

    Can you make that any more vague, Dear Leader?

  125. 125.

    Brachiator

    @Steve in the ATL:

    An honour, an apron, an hour all make sense because the initial “h” is not pronounced.

    By these examples, shouldn’t “An istorian” be acceptable?

    I suspect that English didn’t sufficiently digest the Norman French “histoire.” Or also retained the Greek derived “historia.”

    Similarly, it’s “Quelle horreur,” silent h, but a horror movie.

    BTW, it used to be “a napron” (from naperon). And going the other way, it used to be “an otch,” instead of “a notch.”

  126. 126.

    LC

    @Steve in the ATL:

    In “history”, “historic”, “historian”, et al, the initial “h” is pronounced. Unless you’re Dick Van Dyke.

    But that’s nonsense. For many people, “historic” and “historian” have an unstressed first syllable, which means it resembles a vowel, so it gets “an”. That’s still common. Hell, I would say that in the northeast it is more common to have “an” than not. (The point of mentioning “apron” is that I thought if this is your argument, you would be opposed to the word and insist it go back to being “a napron”.)

    @Steve in the ATL:

    The Gaulois (heh) were too primitive to pronounce the full Latin words so they bailed on the endings.

    How charmingly bigoted of you. The romance languages evolved from Vulgar Latin, which had already started altering the grammatical case structure. “The barbarians were too primitive to speak well” is very classically classist though.

  127. 127.

    Ruckus

    @Dorothy A. Winsor:
    Most of the people around him are used to buying their way around anything they say. They just pay for their mistakes. Normal people don’t have the spare change to do that.

  131. 131.

    NotMax

    @waysel

    Even that is sort of fuzzy.

    It sounds right to the ear, for example, to say:

    Ed has a habit of offending.
    Ed is an habitual offender.

  132. 132.

    Dan B

    @Sab: I grew up in N Ohio so know how to pronounce Geauga. In WA state there are some doozies. Pronounce Puyallup, or Sequiam. Even local broadcasters don’t get them, and others, right.

  134. 134.

    Dan B

    @SFAW: Very good! For years I said poo-ya-loop while making a funny face because I knew it was the wrong pronunciation.

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