I have decided to watch the entire Marvel Universe in order, so right now I am watching Brie Larson as Captain Marvel. She’s a touch of a teutonic goddess, no?
In other news, I have been trying all day to get my head around this Mike Johnson fellow- how do you become Speaker of the House and reach the age of 51 without having a bank account? I mean, this is not 1823 or even 1923. You simply can not function in this day and age without a bank account. Am I misunderstanding this? Does it just mean he doesn’t have enough money to report?
Crazy. This is weird as fuck, too:
House Speaker Mike Johnson and his teenage son used an “accountability” software program to monitor each other’s phones and other digital devices to scan for any “objectionable” activity, the lawmaker explained at an event at his Louisiana church event captured in a resurfaced video clip from last year.
It wasn’t immediately clear what objectionable activities Johnson and his son, who was 17 at the time, were targeting.
The website for the subscription-based “accountability” program named by Johnson, Covenant Eyes, targets porn. The first page of its site asks: “Struggling to quit watching porn?” It then warns: “You’re Not Alone.”
Johnson referred to his son in the interview as “my accountability partner.”
These guys are so fucking weird and sexually repressed. No wonder they are all miserable.
In news closer to home, I want to warn you all in advance that Steve is in declining health. He had some teeth removed a month ago, and had lost some weight and his blood sugar was a touch high (200). We put him on special food which is EXPENSIVE AS FUCK (60 bucks for a case of 24), and I’m giving him a lot, but he still feels like he is losing weight and just skin and bones compared to the Steve we all know.
I have another appointment on Tuesday with him, so we will investigate more.
I wanted you to know this because I don’t want to surprise you all with sudden bad news months from now. He may also just be aging- he was several years old when I got him, so he may be 12-14 years old. So who knows. He’s still happy and spends all day with me at the desk, so that is good.
Medium Cool – Song Lyrics!
schrodingers_cat
Have the doctors checked for his thyroid levels. My dear departed ginger cat started losing weight and it was a thyroid problem. She got 3 extra years with the thyroid medication.
mvr
Good luck (or even better good non-luck) at the Doctor this week with Steve.
SomeRandomGuy
Anything over 10 is old for a cat, but, cats who are indoor-only, and well cared for, may live into their 20s. This might be a minor issue that passes, or, it might – hey, I won’t lie to you! – or, it might be the beginning of the end. The only thing you’ll know for a while is who and how he is *right now*, so cherish that all you can, while keeping an eye open for changes. Good luck, friendly scritches, etc..
Soprano2
@schrodingers_cat: That was my first thought as well. I had several cats go through that. The last one was under 5lbs when she died.
Quiltingfool
I’m sorry about Steve’s health, but glad he still wants to hang out with you. Hope the vet visit goes well.
HumboldtBlue
At least Steve stayed home, Salad has moved two doors down to hang out with the neighbor’s older cat. Salad has gotta be 12-13 or even a bit older, and I think kitty dementia has played a role. He came and visited me on Friday, but he rarely comes home anymore.
Also, I am excited about this TV series coming next year. Shogun.
Alison Rose
Oh Steve :( Sending good thoughts your way, JC.
Frankensteinbeck
You don’t. He has one and he lied about it for years. He got away with it when nobody was paying attention, but now nosy folks want to know why he’s lying and what he’s hiding with that lie.
As I mentioned in a previous thread, I think it’s a show. All Johnson has to do is look at porn on some other device, and his son can show his wife and tell the outside world how pure Johnson is. It’s exactly the kind of pathological posturing that evangelicals love.
Wombat Probability Cloud
John, I had the same reaction as schrodingers_cat: It could be hyperthyroidism. We’ve had two older male cats who developed that and there were things we could do to extend their lives in comfortable ways. Regarding Johnson, as has been noted by the excellent Mark Sumner, he may be in serious debt, lying in his reporting, or gaming things by distributing things across numerous small-value accounts (below the reporting threshold). Seriously weird, though. I find myself looking forward to future revelations (without a capital T).
Dorothy A. Winsor
I’m glad Steve is happy and hanging around you. Life is good.
kjazz
Our cat just passed away in June (19 yrs young!), and she was on special low-carb diabetic food for past decade or so. It was always more expensive than regular food, but in the past couple years it shot up in price dramatically. So for the last year or so of her life, we ended up buying cheap cans of tuna and mixing them 1:1 ratio with her vet food. Saved money and gave her a mix of her favourite meal. Win-win!
MagdaInBlack
@Frankensteinbeck: Somebody got caught watching porn, else they wouldn’t need to be monitored.
Ohio Mom
Seems like only yesterday when Steve arrived, how time flies. I hope he remains comfortable and happy for as long as possible.
On the Mike Johnson lack of a bank account: A Democrat would be right out in front, clearing any confusion, explaining their personal financial systems, handing out their last twenty years of tax returns. It’s so Republican of Johnson to skirt the entire issue.
I hope there are scads of reporters digging into this mystery and that their findings are published/aired soon.
Matt McIrvin
@schrodingers_cat: My tortie Niobe had hyperthyroidism, and we probably gave her a little more time with the medication, but I’ve always wondered if we could have done better with radioiodine therapy, which was an option.
Frankensteinbeck
@MagdaInBlack:
Possible, but not at all necessary. Remember, it’s a show. They’re modern day Pharisees. Johnson is telling everyone how virtuous he is by providing proof that he doesn’t look at pornography. Proof in the hands of someone young enough to leak the information of how virtuous Johnson is. Proof that also doesn’t actually stop him from looking at porn, just stops him from using a specific phone to do it.
lamh36
@MagdaInBlack: Like…how much porn was being watched if they have to now monitor it…smh
lamh36
Sorry to hear about Steve, John.
Hope you hear some news from the vet to at the very least make thing a bt better for Steve maybe?
HinTN
Johnson is a lying fuck and a fraud, but he’s of the (R) tribe so what else is new.
(((((Steve)))) and Cole)
hells littlest angel
Johnson didn’t report having a bank account in his financial disclosures. His House pay is direct-deposited somewhere. maybe to some weird christian heavenly affinity credit union, but more likely to a bank of some kind. He’s a shady character, horn-rimmed glasses and slathered-on piety aside.
dmsilev
So, with regards to Speaker Johnson and his porn ‘accountability’ system, one point that was brought up by the Rolling Stone article is that this software by design scans all of your devices and sends the data to someone else. Supposedly just your chosen ‘partner’, but given the amount of sensitive information he has to deal with, ‘supposedly’ isn’t anywhere near good enough. Will he commit to never having this software on any device used to view government documents? Will he submit to verification of this commitment by government security professionals?
And as a follow-up, will he then use that Covenant-free device for viewing porn?
BigHank53
Could be Steve’s liver or kidney or thyroid or who the hell knows. Glad to hear he’s comfortable and happy to be with you. Nothing’s worse than seeing one of your little housemates miserable and you can’t help them. Best of luck to you both.
hells littlest angel
@Frankensteinbeck: Johnson can get back to us when he and his son are wearing wifi-connected smart cock rings (which is a thing I just made up but which probably is real).
Central Planning
A story I have heard about my big company is that they don’t care where you go/what you watch on the company device, they just want to make sure you’re using the software they want you to use to block spyware/malware/ransomeware etc. I’m not really one to test that, but also: who in their right mind wants to proactively check what 80k+ people are doing on their devices. How can that even scale?
sdhays
Mike Johnson seems like a hot house flower, raised with all his needs provided for him. He was even practically gifted a House seat with no one voting for him. Literally, no one, since Louisiana has this absurd rule that if you run unopposed, you aren’t even listed on the ballot.
I hope his sins come crashing down around him ASAP.
Geminid
I wonder if Steve the cat would like half and half. Thats fairly rich nutritionally. I know that cats really like milk.
Timill
Assuming that his (lack of) declaration is accurate, then there are no accounts in his or his family’s name with more than $1k in them and the accounts do not total more than $5K.
So: his and his wife’s incomes are direct-deposited in bank accounts which immediately transfer the money into other accounts that don’t have their names on them. Which to me means they’re some sort of “family business/trust”, probably set up as a church for the tax advantages. Which to me suggests a whole other set of tax fraud if people can look…
TS
@Ohio Mom:
Hope springs eternal but they will probably research which democratic party members have not reported bank accounts to give a both sides to the discussion
sdhays
@Central Planning: Endpoint detection, which any serious company uses, records a ridiculous amount of on-device activity, and nowadays that data can be scanned and analyzed at scale. You should assume any activity you execute on company devices is recorded. The company may not care at the moment (lots aren’t that sophisticated…yet), but I wouldn’t bet on it.
VFX Lurker
You may have done the right thing for your cat.
My cat has hyperthyroidism. She couldn’t keep down the pills, so we give her topical medication. We asked our vet about the radiation therapy, but she advised against it because our cat’s case wasn’t extreme enough. For our cat, there is a risk that the therapy could cause the pendulum to swing too far in the other direction, leaving her with hypothyroidism.
Our vet did have a cat with extreme hyperthyroidism, so our vet opted to use radiation therapy to treat that specific cat.
trnc
JC, thanks for the Steve update. I hope he rallies.
Yes, Mike Johnson is weird as fuck. I didn’t think anything could be much more weird than a father-daughter promise ring, but MJ sure as hell did figure out a way.
Central Planning
@sdhays: True. They don’t care about it until they want to get rid of you.
lowtechcyclist
@Frankensteinbeck:
There’s that, but let’s assume arguendo that watching porn is bad, and the ‘accountability partner’ bit actually keeps him from watching porn.
It doesn’t change anything. He’s still the same person, the person who wants to watch porn. As that Jesus guy would say, he’s still committing adultery in his heart. This demonstrates that if the Lord has any transformative power in people’s lives, none of it is happening in his life. Which is why he’s got to engage in workarounds like this instead.
Why bother being a Christian if that’s the sort of thing you’ve got to do to be able to pretend it’s doing something positive in your life?
And that’s the most positive spin on this ‘accountability partner’ bullshit that I can think of.
RSA
Good point!
Marina
It’s always worth having Steve’s blood pressure checked; treating blood pressure is both very easy and relatively cheap. Also check renal values.
Re: Johnson: where’s the investigation of Johnson “taking custody” of a 14-year old boy when he [Johnson] was 25? He refers to the boy [now adult/not talking to the media] as his “adopted” son, although he wasn’t adopted. He’s not in any family photos…
Cliosfanboy
I hope Steve will be OK…
Urza
@RSA: Their paycheck per month at least is over $5k after taxes using the max retirement deductions. Unless they spend every penny as it comes in, which is unlikely for the house in the Confederacy at least, thats flat out lies or someones a shopping addict.
RevRick
Enjoy your journey through the Marvel Universe. My wife and I are currently watching Ms. Larsen in Lessons in Chemistry on Apple TV, and the character she plays is “on the spectrum”as they say.
Losing a pet is always hard. Even when they’re pet mice. Or birds. Or dogs. Or cats.
Why is it we have such a hard time loving our fellow humans?
RevRick
@Urza: Unless he’s being paid in Benjamins, his paycheck has to go somewhere. Nowadays, our money is basically 1’s and 0’s being electronically transferred from one place to another, but there has to be a point of origin.
satby
@Geminid: once cats are weaned, they’re mostly lactose intolerant. So milk and cream isn’t actually good for them, though they do love it. You can give them lactose free milk, but they might just like a can of tuna better.
Hoping for the best for Steve. Like old people, a lot of old cats just get thinner. As long as they’re comfortable and happy they’re living their best lives because they live in the moment.
Odie Hugh Manatee
Sending good thoughts for Steve and his health!! Our Stewie turned 12 on the 2nd and has his first dental appointment on the 10th. He needs to lose a couple of pounds and we’ve been working on it.
If you want a laugh about the expensive food then think about how expensive his shit is when you clean his box…lol!
Urza
@RevRick: Lessons in Chemistry is decent. Kinda like how she keeps playing women who don’t care about all the social constructs holding women back.
Jackie
@schrodingers_cat: My senior cat started dropping weight and was diagnosed with diabetes. He gave me three bonus years of love thanks to daily insulin.
Another Scott
@hells littlest angel: I ass-u-me this is mostly, as you say, some reporting issue.
OpenSecrets.org has his personal financial disclosure reports for 2017 and 2018. It lists his mortgage banker as being “Citizens National Bank” (February 2013 mortgage loan) in his 2017 report (filed in 2018).
(Of course, there seem to be about a dozen different banks by that name, scattered all over the country.)
The House Clerk (supposedly) has links to all the reports by year, but all I see when I download one is a text file giving names and the filenames of the report, and seemingly the same thing in an XML file – I don’t see the actual reports.
He seemed to file a “90 day” extension for every report – he doesn’t seem to anxious to actually provide the limited information he does…
Dunno.
FWIW.
Cheers,
Scott.
RevRick
@Urza: Most of the men are royal jerks. But she forges on. (My wife read the book, so she knows where this is all heading .)
Lyrebird
Agreed.
Also… ew.
Barbara I
@Jackie: definitely agree about this possibly being diabetes. My cat Emily started eating voraciously and losing weight when she was about 8 years old. Her vet put her on one of the (then newer) long-acting human insulins. With twice daily injections, she lived another 6 good quality years.
lgerard
That is the same accountability software that Josh Duggar used
Obviously it does not work.
Mel
@schrodingers_cat: This was my first thought, as well. Years ago, our 16 year old Maine Coon mix boy had started losing weight, his fur felt less luxuriant, and he was a bit less energetic than usual, yet prowling the house all night. Blood tests showed a slight case of hyperthyroidism, and an ultrasound showed a little nodule in his left lobe.
Other MJS
If Johnson can’t get around the “accountability” app, he’s too stupid to be speaker of the … well, okay, maybe it works for him.
Ramalama
@MagdaInBlack: This anti-pron on app/software…is it shareware (gross) or does someone need to pay for it in order to download it? Google Pay doesn’t take money orders. What if the speaker is into crypto…or is it “chrysto” for the likes of him?
TF79
“She’s a touch of a teutonic goddess, no?“
Her stage strut in Scott Pilgrim vs the World as a rock goddess wearing ridiculous/awesome boots is simply wonderful. (Both Captain America and Captain Marvel are in that movie, come to think of it)
sab
@schrodingers_cat: Agreed. My StarScream had hyperthyroid, ate like a horse, drank constantly, successfully hid his throid medicine (I found pills squirreled away all over the house where he had spit them out), and just wasted away will zipping around.
sab
@Matt McIrvin: We did that with one cat and it worked out great, but the other cat didn’t have levels high enough that the radioiodine was an option.
Villago Delenda Est
Oh, dear, such sad news about Steve. I hope he soldiers through it. He’s such a handsome example of a mini-Lion.
eclare
Paws crossed here for the vet appt for Steve!
eclare
@HumboldtBlue:
I hate to hear that about Salad.
Frankensteinbeck
@lowtechcyclist:
Evangelicals believe that absolutely everyone is irredeemably guilty of sin in their heart, and only loud declarations of faith in Jesus matter. This isn’t a detail, it’s the central creed of their version of Christianity. What they think, what they do, doesn’t matter. They are the good guys because they shout Jesus loud enough.
Performative bullshit like an app that lets you show off how you don’t sin while not actually stopping you from sinning is exactly the kind of thing they love.
HumboldtBlue
@eclare:
He’s safe and cared for, but I had to cancel a vet appt because I wasn’t sure I could corral him, and turned out I was correct.
On a much lighter note, for those who know The Kid, Ken Griffey Jr. was on the sidelines at the Cowboys v Eagles game today as an accredited photographer.
Kristine
Best wishes for Steve.
Sad to hear about Salad. Pet dementia is hard.
JaySinWA
@Frankensteinbeck: I originally assumed the software was for monitoring Mike, but It seems more likely the other way around. Perhaps the kid was coerced into loading spyware on his system. Maybe it’s a mutual anti-porn buddy system, but my guess it was to control the kid and claim purity points as well.
Frankensteinbeck
@JaySinWA:
Dishonest, passive-aggressive, overcontrolling, manipulative and abusive bullshit is also one of their passions, especially in child-rearing.
JaySinWA
@Matt McIrvin: We went through radio iodine therapy with one cat when the medication wasn’t working. In retrospect while it added perhaps a year of life, it didn’t really improve the quality of life.
HumboldtBlue
@Kristine:
I am only guessing on that dementia, it could be something else like the neighbor lady is prettier than me, who knows with him. He left his original mama and moved in with me, so I ain’t even all that mad if he makes another choice, it’s always been about him.
If he’s content, I’m cool. Salad has always been him, he was never mine. We were just two hot and swinging bachelors, although I seem to have lost my Georg.
wjca
If there are other members of Congress claiming not to have bank accounts, of whatever party or no party, I have no problem at all with their finances getting a serious looking at. I know where I’d bet on the majority of said members being affiliated. But a thorough Housecleaning would be all to the good.
wjca
That might explain the lack of money in the bank. As I recall, crypto isn’t, technically, a bank. Of course, it seems like it would qualify as an asset of some kind (albeit a very shaky one)….
NotMax
Starting with what, Blade?
Or subjecting yourself to this marathon because dry cleaners lost the hairshirt?
;)
NotMax
@wjca
Billion dollar idea: Christcoin™.
//
HumboldtBlue
Funny man Francisco has some make-up tricks, ladies.
TaMara
@schrodingers_cat: I second this…Zander started raw thyroid a month ago after seeing similar symptoms, with no other indications of illness and it’s made a big difference. I’d still like to see him put some weight on, but he lost a pound when he had a bad tooth removed last year and hasn’t regained it, but also hasn’t lost anymore.
JaneE
Could be hyperthyroidism or diabetes. Both are treatable. I had a cat with hyperthyroidism and we did the radioactive iodine treatment. She 11 or 12 and lived another 6 years.
Odie Hugh Manatee
@HumboldtBlue:
We had a tuxedo kitty named Freddy who moved in with us for about a year and a half before moving into a neighbor’s place a few houses down. No chip & not neutered adult of about two-three years. We had him neutered and he was at home until he decided otherwise. Afterward he would stop by on occasion but the old couple doted on him and maybe he decided that a house of his own was better than sharing one with two other cats.
As long as he is happy, that’s all that matters! The old couple loved him dearly and he passed a few years ago.
thalarctosMaritimus
@HumboldtBlue: One day I was kind of alarmed when neither of a brother-sister pair I had came home.
It turned out they had both decided to move in with my neighbor, a self-proclaimed priestess of Bast. Apparently, they figured they could get a better deal there than at my place, and just decided one day to move in.
HumboldtBlue
@thalarctosMaritimus:
And here I was thinking it was the wet-food-afternoon-treat that was the draw, but hell, I can’t blame him for running with the priestesses.
El Cruzado
Our first cat was a fat blob for his first 10 years and then skin and bones for the next 7 until his time came so crossed fingers that you’ll still have a few years of Steve, even if less of him than before.
Lymie
@Matt McIrvin: yes, we did the radiation treatment and got 7 more years for it. Tweed was 21 when he died.
lowtechcyclist
@Frankensteinbeck:
I’ve spent a good chunk of my life around evangelicals, including five years of being on the faculty at an evangelical college. I’ve got a pretty good handle on what they purportedly believe.
They also believe, because the Bible says it, that when you make a commitment to Christ, you are ‘born again,’ that as 2 Cor. 5:17 says, you become a new person. This, by their own inerrant standards, is supposed to be transformative.
“Circumcision is nothing, uncircumcision is nothing, the only thing that counts is new creation!” says Paul in Galatians. Damned straight, Paul! This shit is real. This is my life experience. But it sure doesn’t seem to be happening with them, and this is why I hit them from this angle.
If all they can do is yell Jesus loudly, and say they’re saved because they said the right words and were dunked in water, but the transformative power of Christ is absent from their lives, then I know exactly what they’re missing, and why they’ve got to yell Jesus loudly to make up for it.
AM in NC
@hells littlest angel: There are no smart cocks, ringed or otherwise.
MomSense
@HumboldtBlue:
My friends had a cat keep showing up at their house and refusing to go home. They kept bringing her back until the owners said they thought she was happier with them and should stay if it was ok. They had recently lost their cat so they accepted. The cat’s favorite was their daughter and she went off to college. She played the piano and the house was now too quiet for the kitty. My friends are musicians – they teach harpsichord, violin and harp. So the kitty was in heaven with all the music. She was quite elderly and had a great last few years. The daughter visited and all was well.
Sorry to hear about Steve.
Ella in New Mexico
@schrodingers_cat: Agreed. Hyperthyroidsm causes weight loss and elevated glucose levels. We had a 19 y.o female Tuxedo who shrank to about 5 lbs with both conditions but hung around until she was 21 with treatment.
Ramalama
@NotMax:
Which begs the question: WWJM?
(What would Jesus mint)?
Chat Noir
@Jackie:
Mine too! He was losing weight but was eating and drinking normally so I took him in and he was diagnosed with diabetes. He had another 3½ years with us once he started the twice daily insulin. Both he and his littermate succumbed to pancreatitis. They were both my angels!
Paul in KY
@dmsilev: His ‘son’ has another accountability partner named Vlad…
Paul in KY
@dmsilev: Also leaves out any good ole ‘non electronic’ porn (of which there’s still alot).
BellaPea
Our cat, P’Nut, has been diagnosed with early kidney failure. Having said that, she is all of 19 years old and still eats and drinks well, uses the litter box normally and gets around fairly easily. She is losing some weight but still seems to be hanging in there. Cats are so resilient, you never know how long they are going to last. Hope Steve stays around for you for quite a while, John.
Manyakitty
Following, as Heisenberg has dropped from 18 down to 12 lbs in 6 months. His blood work is good, blood pressure is on the low side. The vet said sometimes UTIs show this way in senior cats (he’s 15) so we’re trying the antibiotic shot next.
All the best for Steve.