So Trump flew to Florida for 24 hours and is back in Washington tonight? That’s an expensive round of golf.
— Schooley (@Rschooley) March 3, 2018
Not just golf — he also did a GOP fundraiser: money for him and his cronies, expenses billed to the rest of us schmucks! At heart, in his revanchist daydreams of a vanished America where men were men, women were body parts, ‘colored people’ knew their place, and foreigners were comic props, he’s just the World’s Greatest Tummler…
"He's now president for life. President for life. And he's great," Trump said. "And look, he was able to do that. I think it's great. Maybe we'll give that a shot some day." https://t.co/7c9ZqKx0kZ
— Garance Franke-Ruta (@thegarance) March 4, 2018
Just stitch him some f***ing epaulets already. https://t.co/oVD6tdhqSJ
— Zeddy (@Zeddary) March 4, 2018
"Is Hillary a happy person? Do you think she's happy?" he said. "When she goes home at night, does she say, 'What a great life?' I don't think so. You never know. I hope she's happy." https://t.co/fzPGckOVPL
— Jennifer Jacobs (@JenniferJJacobs) March 4, 2018
Happier than you, putz. Sure, there’s the neverending GOP tsuris about imaginary violations for her to bear, but she’s not the one in Robert Mueller’s cross-hairs.
***********
Then it was on to the Gridiron Dinner in DC, where “journalists” traditionally suck up to “poke gentle fun” at the sitting president:
Trump says he offered Sessions ride to Gridiron but he "recused himself." He says Bannon "leaked more than the Titanic." He adds that "I like turnover. I like chaos." He expresses frustration with Omarosa. "Omarosa you're the worst!" Also calls Pelosi "crazy" but a "fine woman."
— Josh Dawsey (@jdawsey1) March 4, 2018
So he’s just up there talking like it’s a press conference. https://t.co/26yA0b0qYo
— Dana Houle (@DanaHoule) March 4, 2018
Washington Post:
… Nothing about Trump’s attendance at the annual dinner of the Gridiron Club, an elite group of 65 top Washington journalists, made a lot of sense. But there he was at the Renaissance Washington Hotel, accompanied by the first lady, for the club’s 133rd annual gathering doing something he almost never does: observing the traditions that come along with the presidency, particularly the ones that involve performing social rituals.
Presidents since William McKinley, after all, have dutifully shown up at the Gridiron’s formal clambake, which has evolved into an evening of goofy entertainment by the journalists and jokey monologues by a prominent Republican and Democrat, and a mildly roast-y speech by the president…
But Trump found himself on the other end of the ribbing, too. Skits by Gridiron members included Fox News host Bret Baier making cracks about the Russia probe, singing to the tune of “You Can’t Hurry Love” with lyrics that included, “But how many Russians did the campaign meet?/Don Jr. in Trump Tower, about ‘adoption’ – sure.”
Trump, unsurprisingly, seemed to particularly enjoy the skits that took aim at his enemies. A dinner guest noted that the president got a good chuckle out of a song performed by CBS News’ John Dickerson about President Barack Obama’s luxurious post-White House life (set to the tune of “King of the Road”)…
(Yep, the DC press corps(e) will never get over President Obama treating them with the contempt they’d done so much to earn.)
Maybe the most controversial joke by @realDonaldTrump tonight:
"I like turnover. I like chaos. It really is good. Who is going to be the next to leave? Steve Miller or Melania?”
He did turn to his wife, who was in the audience, and ask if she still loved him.
— Michael D. Shear (@shearm) March 4, 2018
I swear for all his mugging & catchphrase prop comic edgelord bullshit he's never told nor understood an actual joke https://t.co/LrCmV5gILU
— Zeddy (@Zeddary) March 4, 2018
Poltico
… Trump said he calls Pence “the apprentice,” joking that the vice president “wakes up every morning and asks, has he been impeached yet.”
Of his time as host of NBC’s “The Apprentice” versus the White House, he said: “In one job I had to manage a cutthroat cast of characters, desperate for TV time, totally unprepared for their roles and their jobs and each week afraid of having their asses fired, and the other job I was the host of a smash television hit.”…
Addressing his ongoing feud with California Democrat Rep. Adam Schiff: “Leakin’ Adam, that guy leaks more than anyone. He’s on the phone so much he doesn’t have any time. He’s, hey, let’s call these guys at Jeff Zucker’s network.”
On how to reduce global warming: “We’re going to reduce the carbon footprint when we travel by shrinking the press pool so we only have room for Sean Hannity, Lou Dobbs and Judge Jeanine.”…
Earlier Saturday, the president had tweeted: “Mainstream Media in U.S. is being mocked all over the world. They’ve gone CRAZY!”
He later jabbed at the media once more in his address before making his exit, to return to the White House. “This might be the most fun I’ve had since watching your faces on election night.”…
BIG CLOSER!
POTUS in his speech at the Gridiron Club tonight said North Korea had “called up” and asked to begin talks but that he responded with “you have to denuke” first. Asking for more information as to what he meant —
— Jake Tapper (@jaketapper) March 4, 2018
Frankensteinbeck
Mean, self-glorifying asshole is mean, self-glorifying asshole. News at 11.
OzarkHillbilly
Sigh… been awake since 1:39. 3rd night in a row of either bad sleep or very little sleep at all. Can’t afford to take a nap today as I have too much to do, but I’m pretty sure my body is going to insist.
Citizen Alan
The funny thing is, for some definitions of funny anyway, is that my feelings towards shitgibbon have not changed at all since election night. There really was no way for them to get any worse. But every time he does something stupid or asinine or Criminal, my hatred of the people who voted for him grows worse. I literally want Trump voters to suffer badly for their actions.
Balconesfault
Trump’s monologue sounds like Alex Baldwin could do it on SNL without rewrite.
Frankensteinbeck
@Citizen Alan:
See, I lived among them, so mine hasn’t gotten any worse. I knew they were this bad. I was surprised to find out so many Hispanics believe they’re white and hate other Hispanics.
WereBear
Before he even took office I was telling people, “Nothing will surprise me. Nothing. My opinion is that low, mark my words.”
And they have been. Sadly, I was right. Still completely unsurprised. Plenty of other things.
Sm*t Cl*de
Michael Steele: The Preznit has lost his marbles.
OzarkHillbilly
@Balconesfault: SNL writers are now superfluous.
magurakurin
wait. what?
oh, Barry, we’re alarmed all right, but considering that you are an Army Ranger with three Purple Hearts, two Silver Stars and two Distinguished Service Crosses, I’m motherfuckin’ shitting my pants now.
and if this shit is true…for fuck’s sake someone tell the asshole he can’t drink Drano, ever, at no time. forcefully and with conviction.
WaPo Dark Days Inside the White House
rikyrah
@Citizen Alan:
They will never be forgiven
rikyrah
@WereBear:
I hear you
Dr. Ronnie James, D.O.
Ladies and Gentlemen…Rupert Pupkin!
Betty Cracker
Oscars are tonight, and I’ve only seen maybe three of the movies that are up for major awards. I need to step up my movie-going activities this year!
Dorothy A. Winsor (formerly Iowa Old Lady)
Hillary Clinton looks reasonably happy to me. The fact that Trump thinks (hopes) she’s not shows what a tiny person he is. But you knew that.
Ken
Dunno why, but “president for life” reminds me of that scene from Men in Black where Vincent D’Onofrio says “You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold dead hands” and the alien replies “Your proposal is acceptable”.
HinTN
@Betty Cracker: At a minimum, you must see The Shape of Water on the big screen.
Chyron HR
@Dorothy A. Winsor (formerly Iowa Old Lady):
She SHOULD be unhappy. We wouldn’t be in this situation if she hadn’t forced so many politically pure progressives to voluntarily surrender their country to literal nazis.
Betty Cracker
@HinTN: Really? I figured that was one of the movies I could safely see on a small screen without detracting from the experience. Dang.
Of all the movies I have seen that are up for major awards, I liked “I, Tonya” best. Looks like Margot Robbie has some fierce competition for Best Actress. I haven’t seen the performances she’s up against, but the actors are amazing. Robbie was pretty awesome, though.
I hated “Dunkirk,” though the cinematography was excellent. Wasn’t crazy about “Darkest Hour” either, though Oldman’s performance was solid. My husband picked out both of those movies!
Bess
@HinTN: I saw it on the back of someone else’s airplane seat. It was a great movie on only a tiny screen.
JGabriel
WaPo:
Trump gets a chuckle out of someone enjoying luxury? Trump?
Right.
Fuck that fucking piece of shit scumbag.
Just one more canuck
@Ken: careful now – i quoted that line in response to a comment and I was told quite piously that using a line from a comedy about aliens made me an ‘eliminationist’
randy khan
@Dorothy A. Winsor (formerly Iowa Old Lady):
I’ve always thought that Hillary is the kind of person who focuses on what she can do now, not what might have been. That probably makes her happier than a lot of losing Presidential candidates.
Bruce K
@randy khan: That tracks with when I met Hillary in 2004, at a women-for-Kerry event in New Jersey. The impression I got there was of a better person than the media gives her credit for being. It’s not her fault that the GOP turned her into their own Emannuel Goldstein.
Nicole
Trump has established that the only thing he’s good at is projection. If he’s speculating that Hillary is unhappy, well… no puppet, you’re the puppet.
debbie
@Sm*t Cl*de:
To borrow a metaphor, you can’t sail a ship as massive as this country after taking a couple shots of scotch and expect to dock it safely. Just ask Joseph Hazelwood.
Nicole
@Betty Cracker: “Get Out” was the best of them, but a lot of older (read, also white) Oscar voters said they didn’t bother to watch it, because horror isn’t Oscar worthy.
To which “The Silence of the Lambs” asks them if they are about a size 14.
Betty Cracker
@Nicole: That was my take too. I don’t believe in karma per se, but I have seen people’s terrible behavior come back to bite them on the ass in a most satisfactory way. Trump has been insulated by wealth and privilege so long. It must be a shock to get blowback for bad behavior.
SFAW
Since Yarrow appears to be sleeping (or otherwise occupied):
Tick, tock, motherfucker.
[N.B.: In case someone wants to point out that the line is not necessarily germane to the OP: that line is ALWAYS appropriate when dealing with Lying Littledick.]
debbie
@Betty Cracker:
Believe in it, Betty. Whether you call it karma or not, it’s a Law of the Universe: What goes around comes around. You get back what you put out. I’ve seen this happen time and time again.
Justice will come. I just hope my head doesn’t explode before then.
Nicole
@Betty Cracker:
Truth. I taught an after-school program for awhile in a combination of public and private schools and some of the private school kids were very… patience testing, shall we say. I think it was because of what you said- insulation from any sort of consequences.
Trump has spent most of his life unhappy, though. I knew guys like him growing up, but with a lot less money. My old riding instructor used to say, when we were riding a particularly difficult equine, that some horses have had their ears pinned back since the moment they dropped out of their mommas. I think the same can be said about some people. Unfortunately, some of those people are born rich and have the means and opportunity to take out their rage on innocent folk.
The ones I grew up knowing, on the other hand, are either in dead-end jobs or in jail. Well, except for one, who, unfortunately, is a defense contractor. So, you know, living off the government.
Brachiator
I hope that the Gridiron Club does something for, or make some donation to, charity. Otherwise I am mildly sickened by this assembly of smug, self-satisfied supposed “elite” of journalism kissing each other’s ass and the president’s ass.
It annoys me even more that Fox News is considered to be part of real journalism.
But I understand that social tradition quickly sprouts up, like weeds, around power centers. I was recently reading something about George Washington, and how he disliked the more ceremonial duties attached to the presidency, but gritted his false teeth and did them anyway.
I don’t have much to say about Trump. I hate him and don’t care if he can tell a joke. As long as he is president, the joke is on us. Can we please impeach him now?
mai naem mobile
I just cannot stand this POS asswipe . What a miserable human being and ofcourse the asshole has procreated and his little assholes have procreated so we have this asshole’s genes still in the population. I bet this asshole has never ever done an altruistic thing in his whOle shitty privileged life. I’ve met some stupid assholes in my life but nobody like this Orange Monster.
Dorothy A. Winsor (formerly Iowa Old Lady)
Hillary Clinton is a “good girl.” I recognize her because I’m a lot like her. She’s smart and was raised to work hard, but also to accept that, for much of her lifetime, her options were limited by her gender. “Accept” isn’t even the right word. For much of the time, she was trained not to notice it and to work hard anyway. She took refuge in being good and knowing that about herself. She had to pay less attention to what other people thought. So she learned to be happy even when life screwed her over. As happy as anyone is anyway.
El Caganer
@HinTN: Best movie I’ve ever seen about loneliness and being an outcast from society.
Magda in Black
@debbie:
Quoting my dear friend : “The worlds round for a reason.”
I have always taken great pleasure watching people hang themselves with their own rope.
With regard to the general topic of conservative humor : bitter, mean-spirited people = bitter mean-spirited “humor.”
El Caganer
Like everything else about him, Trump’s “sense of humor” is fake. This seems to be a conservative failing in general, although if someone can point me to a con who is genuinely (and consciously) funny, I would be happy to stand corrected.
Steve in the ATL
@Betty Cracker:
I do, and there are many days that that belief is the only thing that gets me out of bed
Villago Delenda Est
My hatred for this vile creature is infinite. There is no hell hot enough to adequately punish him for his many crimes.
Suzanne
@El Caganer: Agree. They are not funny.
Agent Orange himself is so fucking weird. His weirdness is pre-politics and maybe even pre-personality. He’s the kind of weird that is indicative of a host of unresolved shit from early childhood.
Feebog
So most of his jokes consisted of insults or barbs at enemies, staff and steel. Just like his tweets. Hw has no sense of humor, just mean spirited invective.
Kelly
@Citizen Alan:
Same.
I continue to be dismayed that just under 40% still approve. That’s a lot of people and those folks are going to be around us for long after trump moves on. I guess it’s useful to know the size of the problem.
Shell
It never fails. God help us when Republicans try to be funny.
Shell
Of the ones for Best Picture, “Get Out” kinda surprised me. Its a good and creepy movie but basically a ‘Stepford Wives’ retread.
Mike G
Imagine the stink if Obama said this.
mai naem mobile
@Suzanne: there is a theory out there that his mom wasn’t around when he was around 2 to three years old..IIRC she had a miscarriage and lost a ton of.birth and it took here a while to recover. Anyhow it was a crucial developmwntal age where you need a mother around. Add the strict asshole father and it probably fucks you up. I know from the couple of psych classes i took in college that his lack 0f empathy is a demonstration of fucked up growth development.
mai naem mobile
@Mike G: the ‘imagine if Obama had done X ‘ game would kill you . If Tim Geithner had taken his wife on a govt paid plane to see the eclipse. If his advisor had dumped some soon to be stinky stocks because of a POTUS decision. If Michelle had slapped his hand away. If Valerie Jarret had made millions off the Inauguration. If Craig Robinson was off trying to get real estate loans from Putin during the transition. My head is going to explode.
hitchhiker
Imagine Obama going for a laugh by wondering out loud if Mitt Romney is happy. Or If John McCain is happy. Imagine W going for a laugh by wondering if John Kerry is happy. Or ….
That Trump thinks this way — out loud, in front of an audience — is too much to take in. Every day I open my laptop hoping to learn that he’s gone. A stroke. A resignation. Anything. He’s the most toxic, dangerous, damaged human being I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen some doozies.
His ongoing presence in our lives is a horror that never gets lessened. It only gets uglier.
Ruckus
@Betty Cracker:
He’s had blowback from bad behavior before. Military school. Not actually being near as rich as he could be because of his personality and business savvy. Of course he’s dumb enough not to learn anything from it other than to be even more of a privileged jackass. Even a lot of privileged jackasses learn this around their 30s and a least polish the rough edges off so that it’s not quite so noticeable. Not this one. He’s been full on privileged jackass since he was an actual kid.
Ruckus
@OzarkHillbilly:
Five nights in the last week I couldn’t get to sleep before 2am, two of those before 3am. Three of those nights I had to get up at 6:30am to go to work. Yes it takes a toll on you.
Hope you get some sleep. Me too.
Mnemosyne
@Betty Cracker:
The Shape of Water has a compelling enough story and actors that it can play on the small screen, but the production design and visuals are amazing enough that it’s worth seeing on a big screen to appreciate it all.
Just keep in mind that, for all of the romanticism, there’s still some gory stuff. Del Toro is a horror director, after all, even when his horror movie has an optimistic ending.
Mnemosyne
Also, I can give you another reason why The Shape of Water has a good chance of winning both Best Picture and Best Director and Jordan Peele will probably get Best Original Screenplay: Peele is a first-time writer/director, and Del Toro has been a successful writer/director for almost 30 years. Oscars are often career achievement awards.
So, yes, race will be a factor, but not the only one and probably not even the most important one. Del Toro has paid dues with Hollywood that Peele has not. And I really can’t get too pissed that the Mexican immigrant is probably going to win.