From Salon:
… Fans who recall her earlier career know that actress and comic pioneer Lily Tomlin spent much of it circumspect about her sexuality. Sure, she openly acknowledged her collaborator Jane Wagner; she narrated the documentary “The Celluloid Closet” in 1995. But last year, Michael Musto said that Armistead Maupin, who wrote the narration for the film, had been displeased with “the absurdity of having a closeted person like her narrate” it. Tomlin didn’t officially come out until a 2000 interview with New York City cable-access TV program Gay USA. Back then, she explained, “I’m not going to make a big national case of it which is what, really, everybody would like to do, or some people. But in most articles, most people refer to Jane as my partner or my life-partner or whatever … We’ve been around so long and been through so much and I always kind of took a lot of stuff for granted. I also never wanted to be anybody’s spokesperson or poster person. You know, I see what happens to too many people.” A year earlier, she told Denver’s Out Front, “I never officially came out in any kind of really public way. I just always lived very simply and openly, but the press has never made a big fuss about me or said anything to me.”…
But on Monday evening, a mere 40 years after sitting down with Carson, she was eager to talk about her relationship and her plans. At an Academy of Television Arts & Sciences Pre-Emmy Performers Peer Group reception, Tomlin, who turns 74 in September, noted proudly that she and her 78-year-old partner, Wagner, have been together for 42 years. Then later, she revealed to E! that “We’re thinking maybe we’ll get married.” Calling the recent strides toward marriage equality “pretty remarkable,” she added, “You don’t really need to get married, but marriage is awfully nice. Everybody I know who got married, they say it really makes a difference. They feel very, very happy about it.”…
More anecdotes at the link.
The legalisms and the ceremony, ridiculous as they are, do make a difference. The Spousal Unit and I had been, shall we call it, dating for fifteen years — and sharing a house for sixteen — when we finally went through the formalities. We didn’t intend to have kids, we’d already bought our first house together, so apart from the not insignificant legal issues like joint taxes & health insurance we didn’t “have” to get married. And yet, after the confetti… well, we celebrated our twentieth offical anniversary at the beginning of the month. I hope Mss. Tomlin & Wagner get to do that, too.