I have no idea what is in the air, but my dogs are driving me damned nuts. Rosie in particular. They’ve been walked multiple times, they’ve been fed, groomed, petted, loved, and it still is not enough. Rosie is walking in between my legs pacing as I sit here trying to work, every now and then letting out a sigh to let me know just how bored she is and just how awful I am. Then she sits down on my feet to let me know she is here, and if I move, she growls and grumps. Then, every now and then she will itch herself out of boredom, making as much noise as she possibly can with her collar, looking at me with those damned JRT eyes just so I know she is bored and WANTS TO DO SOMETHING.
I’m trying to get something done with a software package I have never used before, and she’s doing everything she can to make me mental. I have got to get my yard fenced in.
The Bobs
Get a treadmill.
Kristine
Change in seasons? Coolness in the air? Even my old guy wants to spend more time outside, and the Gaby Bomb would stay outside 24/7 if I let her. Squirrels are out burying nuts. Chipmunks. Lots to chase and bark at.
I’d be toast w/o a fenced yard.
Pavlov's Dog
Dude – Fence/Doggie door, end of story.
gbear
Substitute ‘Obama’ for ‘she’ and you have a pretty good description of a teabagger.
BGinCHI
@The Bobs: Agreed. That dog could be powering Cole’s entire operation.
martha
Earthquakes? In WV? (Yes, grasping at straws on your behalf)
(Sorry, parroting an old ad for Berkeley Farms milk…”Farms, in Berkeley?”)…
slag
I’ve experienced this with my cats. They know when I’m tense or focused and do everything in their power to exacerbate the problem and frustrate the hell out of me.
Either that or they annoy me all the time, and I really only just notice it when I’m tense or focused.
One of those two.
Mary G
You could get her one of those puzzle toys that you put treats in, so she has something to work on.
Or perhaps she is perturbed that she has not had her picture taken for a long, long time and knows her faithful fans miss seeing her.
j low
A fence won’t help at all. They won’t run around or do anything outside unless you are there to watch them do it.
Comrade Colette Collaboratrice
Lock them in the bathroom. That’s what I used to do with my cats when they wouldn’t shut up.
@martha: Moooooo…
Corner Stone
That’s called a “woman” or “female” John.
They don’t much care for it when you call them a “software package”.
kdaug
Weird. The Golden Retriever has been the same way today, wanting to invade my ~3 inches of personal space or stand directly in front of wherever I’m trying to go. At 105 lbs., he can put up quite a blocking maneuver.
(The German Shepard pup has seemed normal, but since she was born in April this is her first fall and she can’t know what’s coming. But still, dogs, this is Texas. It doesn’t get that damn cold.)
LT
Yeah, then put them into the yard and move to another town. They can drive you even more nuts from outside, believe me. (But they should have a fenced yard anyway so they can go play all day, of course.)
John Cole
@Corner Stone: Actually, it’s Adobe InDesign and I am ready to break shit.
srv
Now you know how progressives feel about Obama.
You’ll just have to keep punching us, because we don’t want you kicking your dogs.
eemom
That.
Also, how dare you tag doggies under “Assholes”?!? Grrrrrr……
arguingwithsignposts
@John Cole:
Have you used Quark XPress before? It’s not that different.
ETA: At least it’s not Flash or Dreamweaver.
kdaug
@slag:
This. I’m learning Mudbox 2011, and every time I get intense or confused (coming from a ZBrush background) one of the dogs is going to ring the bell to go outside, scratch the door to come back in, or step on my foot.
It’s like frakin’ clockwork.
licensed to kill time
I used to dogsit a Tibetan terrier. It was the neediest dog I have ever met in my life, bar none. That dog would follow me everywhere with a worried expression on his moppy face, sit in front of me and whine while I was reading, go crazy if I got out of his line of sight for two seconds. I was always SO glad when his owners came back and took him off my hands.
I love dogs. But that dog was just a PITA.
Rosalita sounds like kind of a PITA (I know you love her anyway!) and I bet a fenced in yard would help get her out of your face and give her some self-generated exercise. Maybe.
LT
InhDesign? I laid out an entire book in that. And I remember nothing about it! (I use Quark all the time, and they said we were going to have to switch to InDesign, so I learned it – and they never switched.) You’re probably learning it in much more depth than I did, hence the madness.
slag
@John Cole: When in doubt, YouTube it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1afdyWyWI5k
garbo
I’m with The Bobs. But I’m envisioning a treadmill/webcam/monitor combo that allows us all to pitch in and entertain Rosie when John’s under the gun. Perhaps we could get her interested in staring contests.
jrg
My dog can’t resist licking, getting in your face, jumping up on the couch, etc, when someone’s working.
It drives my wife crazy. I’m used to it. I find it amusing.
bystander
Fence? JRT in the backyard bored and unsupervised = holes in the yard, me thinks. I second the suggestion for a puzzle toy filled with treats. But, you’ll need more than one if Lily decides it looks like fun.
valdivia
OT but I am off to a DNC event here in DC with Obama. Because I am still an Obot I am very excited to get to go to this thing. will report from the ground about what the other Obots were like.
slag
@kdaug:
Wait. Your dogs ring a bell when they want something from you? That is awesome! Have they learned how to call you Jeeves yet?
John Cole
@LT: No. All I am trying to do is take a picture from powerpoint to indesign and then set up a “bleed” for a business card we need printed. I’ve never dealt with this shit before, and am just doing it for a co-worker who is sick and near hospitalized with bronchitis.
I can get the picture in Indesign no problem, but have no idea how to size it- not to mention, the data I was given was in inches, and InDesign is in pixels…..
cs
I have a fenced backyard. It doesn’t help. I let the beasts outside so they’ll play and leave me alone for a bit, and then five minutes later there will be this cacophony of deep bass barks because someone was walking down the sidewalk or there’s a cat on the neighbor’s deck. Once I caught them barking at a piece of paper blowing down the street.
Anyways, I have to run out and get them, since I can’t in good conscience let the dogs bark their idiot heads off and I can’t seem to train them to bark only when axe murderers or Republicans are in the yard. And then the sad eyes, listless pacing, and general guilt-inducing behavior starts up again.
Kristine
It does drive my dogs nuts when I sit at the home office desk and try to work. They will not leave me alone. If I go out to the living room and sit on the couch, they both go to sleep.
Omnes Omnibus
@John Cole:
This is the exact reason DougJ was wrong when he said we don’t need to learn long division anymore.
jl
I third the treadmill. Now, decision is whether you hook it up to a generator for electricity, or dig a well so Rosie can pump the water.
To the rest of the BJ crew: I don’t want to break the hideous news to poor Cole, but his days are numbered. As reported recently by the hapless Cole himself, Tunch launched an exploratory attack recently and chipped Cole’s tooth. The other pets saw it and have decided to move in for the slow kill, one millimeter, or one brain cell, at a time. Horrible to even think about it. Probably, nothing to be done by now. It’s too late.
slag
@John Cole:
Can’t you select the type of measurement you want to use in InDesign? Just like with Photoshop and Illustrator?
James Hare
@John Cole:
Adobe tries to get that reaction from their users. It is an affirmation of their reason for existence. Every time an Adobe user cries in a fit of frustration an Adobe executive gets an erection.
arguingwithsignposts
@John Cole:
JC, under preferences, you can change the ID measurements to inches (it should default into picas, not pixels, fwiw – which is bullshit publishing industry measurements). You can resize the image by using the white arrow tool, clicking on the image, and then holding down the shift key while moving one of the corner points. Then you’ll need to use the black arrow tool to resize the image box using the same method. Just make sure the image hangs about 1/4 inch over the edges of the card width/height where you need it to bleed.
ETA: there’s probably a slightly easier way to do it, but the motherboard on my office comp. with ID on it fried out yesterday, so this is from memory.
catclub
@jrg:
“It drives my wife crazy. I’m used to it. I find it amusing.”
The difference between women who need to get stuff done at home and the men who just hang around there.
(I am in the second category.)
cs
@John Cole:
It’s been a while since I’ve used InDesign, but you should be able to set the rulers to inches via the preferences.
Does the imported picture not have any handles for resizing?
The one thing I remember about InDesign was how annoying it was to learn for quick jobs. I’m sure it would seem logical, more or less, if you used it daily, but I had similar frustrations when I was trying to get a quick one-off project done.
meh
oops as I think I deleted my last post – try using these guys to help you with InDesign.
http://www.kelbytraining.com/online/courses.html&category=indesign
kdaug
@slag: Awesome? Not so much. Pain in the ass? Bingo.
But yeah, we have a nylon strap thing with sleigh bells on it hanging next to the back door. Dogs are trained to ring it when they want to go outside. Half the time, of course, one rings it just to see if the other one wants to go outside and play.
We’ve moved to the “If you ring the damn bell, you are going outside NOW” rule. And of course, once one goes out, the other will ring the bell two minutes later to go out too.
Omnes Omnibus
@jl: I must respectfully disagree with some of your conclusions. My guess is that Rosie is aware that Tunch is planning to spring his trap at the desk where Cole is currently working (and soon), she is simply doing her best to communicate to him the urgent need to be somewhere else where it is safe. Poor girl, Cole just does not seem to understand the danger he is in.
Is it possible that Tunch has mastered the can opener?
kdaug
@Omnes Omnibus: Third variable – DPI on the print side. Yet another PITA.
Glenndacious Greenwaldian (formerly tim)
Fenced in yard is an excellent idea. That energy needs to BURN, and you can’t have a dog running your daily schedule; that’s not good for either one of you.
Treadmill for winter time and rainy days. I bet she would LIKE that a lot. seriously.
slag
@James Hare:
I know some people who work for Adobe, and I’m pretty sure they could verify this claim.
JenJen
You too? Rocco the Aussie is being pretty chill, but Strider’s pulling the “I wanna go out every five minutes” routine.
It’s a beautiful day, so I’ve been humoring the dog. Still, yeah, something’s in the air, and this restless thing is unusual for my little animal family.
John Cole
I’m seriously ready to scream. Anyone with InDesign skills want a 2 minute job?
Ben
Pigears… the only way to bribe your pups. Just gotta do it sometimes.
catclub
@slag:
“I know some people who work for Adobe, and I’m pretty sure they could verify this claim.”
Hands on experience is not always best.
Salient
You win bonus points for posting this under the “Assholes” category. Ha.
MikeJ
@slag: Sadly, all they ever want is for him is to fix the misunderstanding between Gussie Finknottle and Madeline Bassett (of course). It’s enough to make thy knotted and combined locks to part and each particular hair to stand on end, like quills upon the fretful porpentine.
Anonymous37
I guess all that dogwhistle politicking is having an effect on someone …
You get it? “Dogwhistle”?
Laugh, goddammit! Laugh at my joke!
Jules
My dogs are driving me nuts because it is “ismellsomethingiwanttokill” season.
The windows are open and at night they keep getting a whiff of the wild things that live around us (possums and deer) and they barkandbarkandbark and then I let them out and they barkandbarkandbark while running back and forth from one side of the yard to another.
I don’t know what I would do if we did not have a fenced in yard.
The rat terrier mix has spent the last week just looking “very concerned”all the time.
stuckinred
@Mary G: A Kong. Put peanut butter on a piece of milkbone and jam it in there.
Delia
@cs:
So sad and so true. The fact is, dogs do not consider staring at a meaningless little lighted screen and occasionally pressing buttons to be work or to have any interest whatsoever. Work is doing stuff in the yard. Gardening or building things. That is interesting and my dog will sit contentedly and watch me do that for hours. Computers? Never.
slag
@MikeJ: But I’ll bet he forbears, if that’s the word I want. Like Patience on a Monument.
stuckinred
My dogs understand, “get the fuck out of here” very well.
kdaug
@Delia: Or, for our German Shepherd, playing pool. She cannot resist putting her front paws on the table and watching each shot (or occasionally going after the cue while you’re lining up a shot).
Golden couldn’t care less, though, so YMMV.
Poopyman
Oh! It’s Cole!
I saw the title and thought it was Hamsher and her poodles.
Dennis SGMM
@John Cole:
Don’t have InDesign on the machine here. Try going to Edit>Preferences>Units and set from pixels to inches. That will clear up one bit for you anyway.
Just Some Fuckhead
John, why don’t you scroll back to the last “My Dogs Are Driving Me Insane” post and see if you can find any points of commonality between then and now.
LT
@John Cole: My book – no images. Sorry, but it looks like brighter minds are on it. Good luck.
HyperIon
@Just Some Fuckhead wrote:
that’s what i thought also.
Cathie from Canada
Rosie is trying to warn you about the coming nuclear war, but will you listen? No.
Well, she tried…..
Journeywoman
I’d be happy to do it for you, but I’m at work and not on a computer with InDesign at the moment. :o( What arguingwithsignposts said is one way to do it, but if you need to get the picture to a specific size, this is another way.
Basically, InDesign has image content (controlled by the white arrow) and the image frame (controlled by the black arrow). You need to get the content to the size you need, then make the frame fit; if the content is the wrong proportions, you adjust the frame so you only see the portion you care about. So:
1. Choose the white arrow and click on the picture.
2. Look at the options palette (probably at the top of the screen) which should show X & Y coordinates, L and W dimensions, etc. Going from memory here, but there should be a little chain link icon between length and width – click on it.
3. Type one of the dimensions you need into either L or W and watch it resize. Make sure *both* sides are AT LEAST as big as you need them to be, though one might be bigger. You may not be able to see all of the picture right now – we’re about to fix that.
4. Click on the black arrow and right-click on the picture – there should be a menu choice called “Fitting Options” or something to that effect. Choose “Fit frame to content.”
5. Is the image not the right proportions you need? Using the black arrow, either drag one of the side points in until the size matches what you need (for example, making a 5×7 image 5×6), or click on the image and use the L &W boxes in the palette again. You may need to turn OFF the chain link icon you turned on before.
Position the graphic so it’s hanging off the page by the amount of bleed they need (which hopefully they told you).
Hope this helps…
Just Some Fuckhead
@HyperIon:
Prolly something simple like the two times he wore Axe Body Spray for Men or something.
Linda Featheringill
@kdaug:
I’m happy to see that you don’t spoil your pets. Nice, disciplined family you have there.
[I would never, never, ever, every spoil my babies. :-)]
Journeywoman
P.S. It’s also true that you can edit the preferences to display inches, but you can override the current setting at any point by simply typing “5 in” (for example) into the sizing boxes I mention above.
kommrade reproductive vigor
If you’re having the same weather as DC she may be trying to tell you the house is about to get washed off its foundation and into the nearest river.
alhutch
JC – I’m at work right now and can do this. Just sent you an e-mail.
As far as Rosie goes, sounds like a terrier to me.
Cheryl from Maryland
@slag: Ah, the great PG.
trollhattan
@Journeywoman:
Also, too, (if I understand the prob correctly)
Set up the document with bleeds via “document setup” “more options” accessed via the “file” pulldown menu.
Draw a frame using the rectangle frame tool the exact size and location you want.
“Place” the picture into the frame, accessed under file pulldown.
“Fit” “contents (photo) to frame” into the frame via “fitting” under the “object” pulldown menu.
any luck?
TrishB
@John Cole: I hate to be Captain Obvious, but have you Googled “pixels to inches conversion?”
trollhattan
@John Cole:
Also, also, too part deux, units are selected in the same document setup dialogue box, via the box in the far upper left corner. There ye find inches.
LarryB
John,
I feel your pain. I have a border collie with similar issues. I’ve had success with a short leash tied to a heavy chair. Similar idea to crating: The leash lets the dog know where he/she is supposed to be, which calms them down.
Larry
kdaug
@Linda Featheringill:
Yeah, we “every spoil” our babies on a regular basis. Still easier than human children.
El Cid
Uh oh. Once again the UN is showing a very mean face at Israel.
Of course, the US rejects it, because, you know, sometimes you just can’t help but repeatedly shoot a civilian on a boat who’s trying to bring aid to people whose children and pregnant women are suffering intense anemia.
Ed Marshall
@John Cole:
set indesign to inches
asiangrrlMN
@El Cid: In a dog thread, no less? Must you?
By the way–my cats. They are taking their tenth nap of the day, per usual. I was able to rewrite a story and send it to Glimmer Train to meet a contest deadline. I am going to keep submitting to them until they accept something just so I’ll leave them alone. This piece would actually fit, somewhat, in their literary journal as it’s literate (I’m usually much more vernacular), poetic, has no sex and no swearing.
Wombat
Get a dog door and an invisible fence. My dogs entertain themselves and leave me alone.
Yellowdog
@John Cole: InDesign is HORRIBLE. I hate it! You have my utmost sympathies.
Tim F.
I took Max to the park for an hour and a half of chasing ball and jumping on other dogs, and now he won’t stop whining for attention. He’s chewing on the wall. I keep telling myself that around two years they calm down. He’s four months old.
Zuzu's Petals
Dear BJ friends –
Everyone was so supportive when I posted last weekend about my 19-yr-old Maine Coon who was “winding down.”
So I’m sorry for not giving any updates since then. Quite honestly, I wasn’t sure how it was going to go for him.
He spent three days at the animal hospital, with IVs for severe dehydration, and x-rays and ultrasounds that revealed no single reason for his nosedive. In the meantime, he lost his appetite and couldn’t walk at all.
So I brought him home yesterday, and today the vet came to my home and gave him a shot as I held him in my lap. It was so quick, and so peaceful as we sat in the backyard with all the comforting noises of the world going about its everyday business.
Tomorrow I will take him to a family-run pet crematorium and then scatter his ashes in one of his favorite shady spots out back.
Thank you all again for the wonderful support. It meant a lot.
Rest in peace, Giblet.
Gozer
I’m just north of Philly and I bet it’s the tropical storm’s sloppy seconds driving Rosie insane. I can hear my neighbour’s dog from all the way across the street having a mental fit.
EDIT: I know you’re near the other end of the state, but animals have a knack for those things.
Zuzu's Petals
@Zuzu’s Petals:
This is the actual comment I was thinking of. Sorry.
Lots of good advice from everyone.
Kristine
@Zuzu’s Petals: I am so sorry.
LT
@Zuzu’s Petals: Oh oh oh. Me and my wife did that with her 19-year-old Aussie cattle dog three years ago. And my boss with his 14-year-old, which came to work every day, just a few weeks ago. It is a trip how quick it is. Very very not fun.
Hang in there, ZP. We’re thinking of you.
stuckinred
@Zuzu’s Petals: It’s the second best thing you will ever do for a dog. You’d already done the first with your love.
El Cid
@asiangrrlMN: I swear I was trying to comment in the ‘Terrorism’ thread.
There’s something weird that goes on in Firefox in which when you’re in the comments box on one page, if you hit “tab”, instead of going to the “submit” button, all of a sudden you jump down to a completely different post way below the post you’re supposed to be on.
Sorry.
LT
@Ed Marshall:
This comment…
…probably has Cole picking pieces of glass out of his arms where he just couldn’t take it anymore.
Cat Lady
@Zuzu’s Petals:
Now i haz a big sad. 19 though, wow. What a lucky guy, to live long and end in peace. We’ll see them all later, and until then RIP all you sweet souls.
JCT
@John Cole: Oh, I’m sorry for you, John. I’ve been using Photoshop since it was on floppy disks (stop laughing) and Illustrator for *years* but InDesign makes me want to jump out the window.
Poopyman
@Zuzu’s Petals:
Very sorry to hear that, ZZP. It hurts now, but that was the best goodbye you could possibly have given him, to be at home and in your lap, feeling the breeze. To be so well for so long means you gave him a great life as well.
Mourn and honor him, and know you gave him a wonderful life.
quaint irene
Ummm, if you’re like the rest of the entire east coast today, STORMS!
My Katie woke me up around 7 this morning, just as the first wave of heavy rain was heaving in. By midday we had a lull, and now we’re just waiting for the next deluge and high winds to start. At least according to our local weather guys, with their usual apocalyptic forcasting.
Keith G
@Zuzu’s Petals:
Peace to your big guy. As I recall, he was a great looking dude. I will give my two girls (who are currently playing in an empty box) an extra belly scritch in honor of the intrepid Giblet.
Anne Laurie
@Wombat:
__
I have heard nothing but bad things about ‘invisible fences’ and terriers. Basically, the ‘shock’ has to be dialed up pretty high before they pay any attention at all. Then when the terrier’s prey drive kicks in, they barrel right through the pain anyway, but — assuming they don’t end up as roadkill — they’re too smart to walk back through the barrier and get another shock. So you end up barricading your dog outside your territory… and if you’re lucky, their barking & howling will get your neighbors’ attention and they’ll call you rather than the police.
JCT
@Jules: This!
Our naughty beagles were running around the backyard a few weeks ago doing exactly what you describe…. until all of a sudden I noticed eau de skunk waft through the window…
Dashed outside and was almost knocked ass over tea kettle by the little beagle who dove into the living room to rub her face all over my couch before I could tackle her. Skunked right between the eyes dumb dog….
Strong thoughts your way ZZP, I held my little Trixie during the shot a few years ago, could swear I felt her soul lift free. Greatest kindness in the world is to comfort someone at the end.
Anne Laurie
@Zuzu’s Petals: I’m so sorry to hear that you lost your old friend. You’ll be in my prayers, and I hope that the good memories — not least being able to let him go peacefully & in his own home — will provide some consolation.
Dave Trowbridge
Stop complaining and crate train them. Both you and they will be happier–and you will be able to transport them safely.
Being in the crate is NOT punishment.If you do it right, it becomes he dog’s den, a safe place where nothing bad ever happens.
slag
@Zuzu’s Petals: I’m so sorry for your loss! Giblet was adorable and his memory will be with you always.
I only hope that my 13-year old (presumably) Maine Coon lives as long as your Giblet did and dies as peacefully. It’s a good life–snuggling curled up on a knitted blanket with a paw over your face. We can make it last only so long, I suppose.
Zuzu's Petals
Thanks so much to all for your good thoughts for my kitty. It means a lot.
He had a good run for starting out as the runt of a litter living in the parking lot of my son’s apartment building.
Ash Can
@Zuzu’s Petals: So sorry to hear that. Condolences on your loss. You gave Giblet a long, good life.
Delia
@Zuzu’s Petals:
My condolences on the loss of your beautiful companion. I once had a Maine coon who looked a lot like yours. He was the best cat I’ve ever had and the pet my children grew up with. He’s been gone fifteen years and I still miss him.
Liberty60
First speak to them in a calm, soothing yet commanding voice;
Tell them on no uncertain terms that you will take them to the local Vietnamese restaurant and sell them “on the hoof” if they don’t behave.
Dog is My Co-Pilot
We have a fenced back yard, but our female golden still can’t get enough attention. She constantly wants to be petted, scratched or otherwise touched in some way. And if you don’t, she’ll flip your hand with her nose, lean against you or put her head in your lap until you cave. She’s the most maddening dog I’ve ever owned, yet it’s hard to be upset with her for too long. There are times, though, especially when I’m tired that I get a little impatient with her and have to tell her to go lie down somewhere.
hilzoy
Zuzu’s Petals: I’m so sorry. Knowing it was the right thing to do for his sake doesn’t help at all, I find.
(Annika, who I think might have been part Maine Coon with a tail like a feather boa, only furry, got a very aggressive kind of mouth cancer last year. I got her when she was 3 weeks old; she was almost 14 when I took her to the vet for the last time.)
It’s so tough. I’m so sorry.
DaddyJ
@Yellowdog: No, John, InDesign rocks, but only if you’ve been doing page layout day in and day out since 1988.
Like the folks say, first off, set your Preferences > Units & Increments to Inches.
Then Place your pic. Click to put it where you want. Then hold down cmd-shift (on a Mac, disremember what it is on Windows) and drag a corner box to resize and scale proportionally.
It gets confusing ’cause there’s two different picture manipulation tools: a black arrow, which manipulates the box, and a white arrow, which manipulates the image inside the box.
Good luck!
asiangrrlMN
@Zuzu’s Petals: I have been thinking about you and Giblet, ZP. My deepest condolences to you on his loss. May he peek in on you from time to time to make sure you’re all right. Play freely on the other side, sweet Giblet.
@El Cid: I’m just busting your chops. Carry on!
@hilzoy: Beautiful girl. Sorry for your loss, too.
suzanne
As a former graphic designer, please let me assure you that InDesign kicks Quark XPress’s ass in every way. I have been training some of my students in how to use InDesign, and though there’s definitely a learning curve, it’s wonderful in comparison to what we had before.
Make sure you “package” the file when you’re all done, though, not just “save”.
Zuzu's Petals
Ash,Delia, Hilzoy, asiangrrlMN –
Again, thank you. (Annika looks like she was a lovely cat with a lovely name.)
Here’s a funny pic of Giblet from a couple of years ago (posted last year), after an extreme haircut. He’s the third one down.
Calming Influence
John, you just need to get another dog. The more you’re outnumbered, the less significant you become, and the hounds will only think about you when they’re hungry.